hunniebe alexa But you need to know if he is can make you satisfied in bed because if he is boring as dead log then you’ll be frustrated as hell lol . 😁😁😁😉😉😉 You shouldn’t sleep to a guy and expect him to commit with you after because you’ll get hurt , you should decide to do that stuff as adult no blaming after it happened;)
Have women ever wondered what men would do if all women suddenly didn't base such a large portion of their self-worth on their body, without warning, in one day? And what if it was typical for women to say that they didn't like guys just because they were good in bed or know how to present themselves in a charming way in the first few weeks/months of knowing them while ignoring oxytocin, obviously remarking all of the sexual advances from men that would more-often be indulged after this just for the fun of it? Wondering about pregnancy? No worries. *Abortion.* What if women still talked about great sex, but with *NOTICEABLY less* excitement and expression? What is it those celebrity guys who get girls say to everyone when they get the girl(s), "She wants what I have"? And the guys base a big part of their self-worth on this, don't they? This is what they get praise for. Guys have built entire *careers* out of it to teach other guys *JUST TO HAVE WHAT WOMEN WANT.* What would they do if you didn't care about their swooning techniques & bedroom 'martial arts' and spent MUCH less time going on about it? Our countries would be going in very different directions, wouldn't they? How would men react if this happened? Is this not just a gigantic feminist chess-move that has been cooking for generations? Men would react in many ways, and panic would definitely be one reaction for many men if they have based their career on RELATIONSHIPS because they would suddenly have NO idea how to teach their consumers/students and their career would crumble. Eh, who knows? I'm probably just crazy and I'm totally projecting an ulterior motive through these questions for my own benefit. Let's just say your assumption is justified. Why not? You don't have to be moved at all. You can just be safe with your pots of "gold." Stay where you are. You can even put words in my mouth if you want. I'll tell you, though, that being a visionary and having the courage to imagine things being different and better somehow refuels my faith in humanity; or rather in humanity's potential.
I'm grateful, I haven't slept with the man I care about. All of a sudden, it seems he either has a change of heart about me or has lost interest. It's easier to cut off communication and walk away. When you haven't given him your all.
I've been in long term relationships where the love making is constant and satisfying (or as satisfying as it can get after some time) and the relationship can still fail. I think you really hit the jackpot when you find someone that is intellectually compatible with you as well as attractive (to you). That way when the hormones stop, you will still want to spend the rest of your life with that person cause you both see life so similarly.
Same here….it got to the point where if we didn’t have sex or had bad sex…it made me feel like the relationship was in a bad place 😩 little did I know the fact that I based our relationship on the sex cus that’s all he really offered was what made the relationship bad in the first place :(
This happened to me I was married to an abusive man when I met a young man at his work I was so nice and kind to him For some reason he started staring into my eyes constantly and I couldn't understand why Then I didn't see him for a few weeks at his work . Don't ask me why I started missing him and kept thinking about him all the time This never happened to me before I didn't go into that store for a couple of months , so I could get him out of my head . I bumped into him recently and asked me if I have divorced my husband yet , which I am going to do . I am old enough to be his mother but I look younger than my age I think he is a player lol
Empress Qi He's not teaching anyone to play games. This guy is probably the most well informed, woman-empowering relationship expert I've encountered on RUclips. He's explaining how to avoid games and artificiality.
In the past, I fell in love with a guy who is not physically my type because he's always there for me and a good listener. After being intimate with him, I instantly felt more in love! He suddenly became handsome in my eyes!!!! 😂 So yeah. It's too dangerous.
It's lame if people do it for arbitrary melodogmatic self-superior rigid moralistic reasons, for sure. However, yep, it's fascinatingly true that often scientific reality is the original basis for humans forming so many overblown rigid moralisms, and this is one of those cases. Yeah, sex impairs judgment, so when making big decisions, people should make the judgment (or at least most of it) before having the sex.
True.Never give up the "diamond".Once a man got his orgasm,he cleans and go home like nothing happens.That is what marriage is for.unless if a girl is a prostitute,she'd take the money first.
“Try to be the director of your thoughts and feelings, It’s not because you think or feel something it is the truth.” I needed these words - My anxiety has been high and I appreciate these words!
I overvalue everyone, so you understand how hard my life it is..in other words, I project my own kindness, consideration and forgiveness to others, unfortunately...people are not as good as we think 🤔
I don’t think it’s possible 🤔. Maybe just stop caring altogether. That’s the true secret. Do your thing and if someone wants to walk out...just let them. There is never a guarantee even about tomorrow let alone with human relationships.
Personally I don't think it has anything to do with how the woman is. It's all about the man. If they're into other women look at other women and get intrested that's on them! Nothing to do with his partner or the other women.
I partially disagree. There are men will always be looking for someone else because they don't have the drive to settle on one woman but there are men who will start looking elsewhere because they don't like how they are being treated. Doesn't necessarily mean they will cheat but if they aren't satisfied with their partner they will be more inclined to become interested in other women or to look. Saying it's all about the man is pretty much saying you can't do anything wrong which isn't true at all. I've seen female friends drive their partners away because of their own behavior (being overly jealous, paranoid, controlling, nagging, demanding, not affectionate anymore etc) and then blame it all on them. Of course men do this too. As humans we can be controlled by our ego (I'd say most of us are) and when our ego is hurt it's hard to admit that we might have played a part.
I know quite a few women who have been cheated on (due to work) and I have to say, that for the most part, it is all on the man. Some men womanize, etc no matter how wonderful and beautiful their partner is and how much she meets his needs. Most of the women were shocked because everything in their relationship were great... both happy, shared goals and values, great friends, etc. I believe most cheaters are simply narcissists and the more they bond, the more he feels a need to look elsewhere to feel in control or because he’s entitled.
Obviously it’s not the same with everyone. My boyfriend and I got physically close fast, but he still can’t get enough of me. I think it’s more about attitude than anything- if they need to go, they should go. Be confident, love you first.
Dont even marry anyone else. Love your home and surround yourself with everything filled with love in your home. Spend time alone with yourself and love you first
My husband left me 3 years ago. I had the mindset of what you said in your comment. I was perfectly fine, got over my husband. Well, I started a new job and am extremely attracted to a man that isn't the right guy. I'm pretty sure he feels the same way. I have no control and I almost wish I would've never met him. I feel so lonely and sad now. I've been numb the last 3 years. But now I'm feeling lonely, vulnerable.... I don't understand how a crush can cause so many emotions in me. I want to go back to how I was.
I don't sleep with anyone and keep men in an arm's length and keep them guessing. I live my life and let them know if they need to be part of it then to work for it. Don't make him your life and give your self away. They don't appreciate they like working for it. Let them.
yes ....true. ...men love to work for it and they will appreciate u more ....when women give in to men easily they become bored and the relationship doesn't last
Intelligent persons will know the personality of a person before the physical connection. Commitment and stability is real. But many persons are coward in commitment and stable relationships.
1:30 you are already wrong. I feel closer to a man when I see him making sacrifices for me and going out his way to make me happy. Whether it is genuine or not that makes me feel closer. I've been in sexual relationships where I've just felt it served it's purpose and I lose interest. A man that has invested in me has a better chance at keeping me interested. It's important to realize while in a relationship both partners will find others attractive. Also, if someone wants to cheat they will convince themselves why it's ok no matter how much sex you are having.
Scientifically and Emotionally, a woman will always tend to find excuses for guys and will subconsciously fall into these mistakes.. this video illustrated how Women in general act and react in a relationship. Very organised and delightful content. Thank you so much for this beautiful video. All the best for the new video..
No not ALWAYS. The chemical reaction happens, but we don't always let it bowl us over. As he pointed out you can step back and reflect rationally on the feelings, otherwise no one would ever say no to a potential partner that they're not compatible with.
Such a timely video. I just started a new relationship and flying high. I do not like this seeming lack of control of my feelings and frequently just want to run from the experience. After a painful divorce nearly 10 ago, I’ve had no interest of possibly going through the pain again. Here I am now getting to know an amazing man and freaking out about these “happy emotions”. You are right..things he used to say that made me smile have less impact on me. I need more and more time to talk to him each day and he expresses the same need. Not to mention it is a long distance relationship, so the longing to see one another makes it worse. Again my instinct is to run, solely because I’m scared of being hurt and falling from this high. He hasn’t done or said anything that is a red flag. As a social worker, I’m constantly looking. Your information makes it easier to know where my feelings are coming from so I can manage it all. You’ve saved the day and possibly the relationship.
...i can relate completely!!!! allowing ourselves to "fall in love" can be such a terrifying thing.....how i cope with this perceived fear is i tell myself that if it doesn't work out i still have myself and my great life. i lived without him once and I can do it again! we will survive, as you are fully aware....all the best to you xo
Dawna , That’s exactly what I’ve been telling myself through the whole amazing time of getting to know him. I had a great life before and it will be just as great, no matter how this turns out. Love of “self” always comes first!! xo
I would suggest to try the unavailable period of two weeks let him know you are doing things to help other people in a compassionate way. Help disabled, elderly. Read the bible to children. Adopt a wise mom. BUT do stay in touch with him. Care about his conversation
That's why people need to be more rational and have a long term perspective rather than being in they feelings all the time, only for instant gratification.
Brian, I just wanted to say that I love your videos. You bring a down to earth approach to relationships that is so refreshing. All your videos have actual value, unlike lot of other dating advice videos on RUclips. Keep up the good work, Brian.
VERY SMART....A LOT OF WOMEN DON'T KNOW ABOUT OXYTOCIN! RELEASE!! 🌈👁👁🌈 IN SHORT, IT IS WISE FOR WOMEN TO TAKE THEIR TIME TO GET TO KNOW A MAN BEFORE THEY EVEN GO THERE! OR EVEN ASSUME , THE GUY IS RIGHT OR GOOD FOR THEM!!
I have a new one lurking in the background who is cute. I scream in my mind, "Oxytocin!" And " Stay out of bed, stay out of trouble," has been my mantra.
I don’t think I have ever commented on any of your videos Brian.., I really appreciate these... this one, especially, was very thought provoking... being a nurse, I really appreciate the physiological aspects of emotional attachments... thankful to hear “why” this happens... it makes so much sense now!!! We, as women, need to pay more attention to what is happening in relationships so that things will have positive -instead of negative outcomes... thanks again!!! 😊
Why would you advise a woman to make love to a man she isn't married to? Would you advise that to your daughter, if you have one?? This is why so many children grow up without fathers and women have several different baby daddies. Plus everyone knows the opposite occurs. Sleeping with a guy makes him less likely to stick around or marry you. Men lose respect and the awe for the woman after he sleeps with her. She loses value in his eyes.
Maybe because this isn't the 16th century lol. Someone shouldn't necessarily leap into sex right away, sure, there's a good basis for waiting a while, but marriage? Really? What a ridiculously arbitrary line to draw, and a totally unrealistic and excessively committed one which directly ruins people's lives with legal/financial drama, because people like you pressure them into signing a bunch of contracts before they can fulfill some basic physiological needs which enrich the relationship ... Just, seriously, yikes. Get with the times, and the science, and lay off the ridiculously archaic nonsensical rhetoric like recommending sex wait until marriage, or the absolutely inane part at the end where you're blatantly sexist against guys and making up myths about how they work. Your comment really helps no one, and perpetuates harms that affect men and us women alike.
women lose respect for a guy when he gives his attention for free to her. The same woman who is making you wait couldn't wait for Chad to get inside her. So just walk away and let them enjoy their cats.
@@mariobros7834 I'm really impressed at the advanced technology it must take for you to be able to press buttons on a keyboard when you're clearly a two-dimensional caricature of an actual being
Well it's a fornicator & those who believe in divorces world ; can't you see he talked this clip out for the Laws Of The Lands, which live by the carnal flesh of the mind , which are Natural for them to do, for the natural man do the things of the flesh; while the Spiritual man do that which is Spiritual & both are in contradiction with each other . As written , leave them alone for they both shall walk into the ditch
no if you understand man love pain and uncertainty. and if you are spiritualy under the influence of infinite spirit you will love your self more and will never put him on pedestal.
I never understand what's happening and why I did all this silly things that I already know It's not okay Until I heard you Thank you for this amazing explaining
You are a blessing! You are really helping me. I am guilty of that way of thinking. My relationship is hanging on by a thread, but i think we can work it out thanks to your advice.
I experience this with someone I text with. We have never been on a date 🤦🏻♀️ so strange to have a huge crush on someone that is not interested enough to ask me out.
When u sleep w/ a man u release vasopressin which makes him feel territorial w/ u. Also, territorial of your place(Apt.) if that's where you're intimate.
Discovered that a similar feeling a few years back...and we hadn't even held hands! We have kept physical distance (we are both older adults) but text & phone are only 2 to 3 times a wk.
Brian... your knowledge rings true based on my study and experience. I’ve watched nearly every video, not only for myself where I am, now, but to learn from mistakes of the past and prevent heartache in the future. I appreciate the work that you do, as it’s measured and results-oriented. Because of that, it’s as digestible to men as it is to women. That’s crucial, as to enact these lessons, both parties need to understand each step of the equation. Thank you!
Funny that some women think they're safe by being single or not sleeping with a man. You can create oxytocin just from holding hands or hugging. So are you going to never touch a man the rest of your life? 😂 you can't control your hormones. In the video he's saying you'll create oxytocin when you date or meet a guy, but don't mistake that for true love and don't become needy. He's not saying stay away and hide in a cave your whole life. He also didn't say sleep with everyone you meet.... He said IF YOU WANT TO it's a way of having a man bond with you. That's not something new, it's biology.
Thank you for the video.. It is hard finding videos about men being committed and not attracted to other woman once they are with a partner. Because the internet is full of videos about men cheating and trying to make it sound normal that men are made to want many woman... I'm lucky to have a man who only have "eyes" for me.. Other woman just not do it for him..
I was about to sleep with a guy who Id wanted for ages, I walked out because the oxytocin was so high in me I didn’t know if i could handle any more. It was enough for now.
Stay by yourself. You have no problems. Being needy is not good. If you like being alone, don't get into a relationship. Nothing but arguments. It's actually good to spend time alone. It builds your confidence and self-reliance. You feel really proud of yourself if you can do things on your own. Less stress equals a longer life. Stress is a killer.
Just as much as hairs become invisible to men once they have been clipped or shaved from their skin, their socks and underpants become invisible once they have been removed from the body (hence, those items being left on the floor for indefinite periods of time).
thank you for incorporating science into this it really helps us understand the why in what we feel you’re a blessing thank you so much hope your kindness in helping us comes back to your tenfold ❤️🧿🙏🏽
This explains my worry about feeling love for my partner/husband of 37 years but not that rush of in love at the beginning. I was wondering if something was wrong with me. Due to mental (his family stole his inheritance which stole our plan for the future and his plans to take care of me) as well as physical issues we have dealt with the last few years we are no longer intimate. We hug and give each other a peck on the lips every day, but now I understand the distance I feel and can do something to change it. Thank you!!
@@successful363 You've missed the point of my message. It's not about the money, it was about the family struggle with the whole process. If you can't be positive and say something supportive, don't comment on others mental struggles.
“If you want to keep your man from looking at other girls, try not falling in love with him in the first place! Then you won’t be jealous! Or try having sex with him! Guys like that!” -most videos on this subject matter
I'm not sure I heard the second thing right. The first thing he said was that oxytocin keeps us glued to a man. Well, I was in a relationship for 10 years and I remember clearly that sex was the last thing that made me feel bonded to him although sex was one of my priorities in the relationship. After sex, all I felt it that my body was "happy", but my heart was intact although I am super sensitive. And cuddling was a no for me. It just felt wrong. I felt more intimate with him if he showed it with his actions. The second thing I am not sure I heard correctly is that "men need sex to feel bonded and have their oxytocine levels rise"?? Like, if you have sex with him, he will feel the bond. Like, in what Universe? It is a recipe for disaster and let me take you for granted a bit. It is a VERY generalized advice and sex works if you are already fully committed. But as I said, sex did zero in my relationship.
I get a lot of oxytocin from myself daily - I feel loved up with myself and life 24/7 and I don't think any guy can compete with that and meet my needs.
Asexualise My Asexual Life we need to bottle that!!!! If I could get the same oxytocin fix off my own self I’ll finally be able to get all my goals and aspirations accomplished! This business of feeling addicted to a Man for connection and love is very over rated and in more cases than not very disappointing and disillusioning. I’m 44 and just so over it!
@@madeinhisimage3447 Awww thank you so much. I self-date a lot which helps. I go out to the cinema and for meals on my own. I go out dancing on my own too. I be my own best coach to myself. Give myself a hug and a kiss. I am a hyper-romantic person and I see romance in most things. I even thing a gnome looks romantic - so cute most of the time. I am a Disney girl and like dressing up for myself. I like looking beautiful for me. When I go to the cinema, it's one of the most magical feelings in the world, especially with myself. I think I am living that fairytale that people say you can't have in a relationship, so if I can't get that from being with a guy, when I get that feeling from being with me, then what's the point? I think I will be unhappy, unless I really do find a guy who wants the type of magical world of quirky feeling that I live in. It may be unrealistic to get that from a guy, but if I get that from myself and I exist, then why is it so hard to find a guy like me, who wants to maintain that feeling with me and for me naturally, because he loves that too. I don't want to go back to a 'normal' boring life and be miserable. I love being in my own magical world, theme parks, zoos, aquariums, Shrek Adventureland, a theatre show, or just simply watching a kids movie at kid's club at the weekend - love doing that! The more I talk about this stuff, the more I just want to keep my life the way it is in this regard and keep improving others areas of it and myself. Why should I settle for any less of a fairytale world that I currently enjoy? Ludicrous. Sacrifice my world for a world more 'normal', no thank, I would be so bored after a short time. I like my candle to burn brightly. The world is your oyster as a solo artist of life, which I am currently better and happier with. I just miss kissing as guy if I am honest, that is it, and I can't just do that with anyone, it has to be a guy I feel safe around and am highly aesthetically attracted to - which is usually mostly younger foreign guys. I think you will accomplish all your goals, ambitions and dreams, go get 'em!
@@AsexualiseMyAsexualLife I am exactly the same ! Always happy in my own company and prefer to go out and holiday alone (often feel guilty for not asking friends along !) I also miss kissing and cuddling if I'm being honest but the cons to being in a relationship far outweigh the pros to me. I'm so self sufficient and secure that it would take someone very special to ever change my mind. Thought I was the only person in the world who felt this way !!
Hi all! I made a guy angry by asking him why he worked so much and for long hours. It's weird to my mind how could someone went mad. Honestly, I felt a bit of empathy because I used to work for long hours too, was tired or annoyed. I didn't ask with the feeling of mothering him, I asked to know why. Apparently he hates that question because others used to advice him on he shouldn't work that long. That was he told me. Of course I still don't know why he works so much. End of story
Thank you Brian for your very interesting and clear to understand videos. Regarding this one, I suffered a lot during the years I was with my ex as even if we were making a terrific love together, he was always looking at attractive women and had a eye connection with them in my presence... we finally broke up because of that mainly. At the beginning I could not trust what I thought I saw but after a while it was obvious... he answered that it was not true and when he was joking with them, he was asking me You made me happy should I have become dull ??
Simple trick treat Men as desert.itz good if he is around,but you are not needy of them at all.Have your own life.people will come,people will leave.Who meant to be there will be there no matter what.The one who want to leave will leave no matter how much emotionally intelligent you become.
It takes 2 to tango.. he should be worried about losing someone like me... know ur worth and don't settle for less. If I'm gonna waste energy everyday thinking of how to keep him interested, he's not worth it...better for him to man up and do his share of the work... equal give and take. Sorry for the bulldozerish intonation, guess I'm just stirred up by this topic. :)
Thank you so much for this video. Now I understand myself more and why I want to be with him all the the time for me this is crazy I have only had one hug from him once and that was over a year ago and I only get to see him once a week and then we can only talk because we can't be alone together we have no privacy I don't think he remembers our hug. And because of the the circumstances we have to meet in we are very restricted we have rowed split up then come back together again a lot of times but we both love each other I am hoping our situation changes for the better. Now I understand the reason for my craving for him there are a lot of beautiful women where I am and he flirts with them this hurts me and I wish I wasn't having to cope with this I wake up in the night thinking of him I have to fight texting him too many times this is driving me crazy 😭
After 2 yrs nearly consistent texting/talking we're meeting for the first time in his country in Nov. He says he wants to cuddle me, hold me, and more. Very sweet. I guess we'll see what happens. We push and pull, and until we meet in person too hard to tell what will result. I'm super excited to travel 7,800 miles to see him.
That's super cute. Anything can happen but I've heard great stories from people who met and grew close through long-distance relationships like that. Best of luck!
@@ItsAsparageese I guess since not physically together we share more of the deeper parts of ourselves. We make each other laugh a lot too. Its said a man falls in love with his eyes, a woman with her ears. Mutual attraction and I love his Afrikaans accent, and he likes my NYC accent!
Isn't all this advice just exactly what Christianity, Islam, and Judaism have always said? Basically, no sex before a serious commitment called marriage? Atheists don't seem to realise that these traditional attitudes actually protected women from unscrupulous men, unwanted pregnancies, and horrible feelings of insecurity. I'm not saying all religious marriages are happy, but I do think there is a higher chance that the wives will be happier than in the misogynistic culture we have now, which evaluates women solely by how they look, (a very masculine outlook), and not by other lasting and much more important qualities they might have.
I dont think i have ever been blind to the faults of guys ive been in relationships with. But rather chosen to accept him or fall for him despite his faults. I know now (age 40 & with one divorce behind me) that is pretty sad. I mean, to give them loving excuses. With the end result being them giving me a broken heart or an unfullfilling relationship. I cant even say I was blind... I saw it and yet I rode the oxytocin high. Perhaps I should be more forgiving of myself? I was high on the hormones & wished rather than belived for the relationship to work just because oxytocin etc feels pretty nice?.. Now I try to keep my eyes more "sober" and less accomodating to faults that affect me negatively. We all have faults of course, no one's perfect. But really need to keep an eye out for faults that effect me negatively or that can be borne without too much discomfort. Someone else said, you need to be able to stand the guy, even on his bad days. That's when it will work.
I have heard it before, and I think it's some of the best and simplistic advice ever. It has saved me from bad choices and the wrong men. If you we're to have a Son with the Man, just ask yourself if he turned out exactly like the Man that you are feeling this attachment to, " would you be PROUD of the Man your Son would one day grow up to become"? You alone will feel the answer from your heart that Your Soul has been trying to get you to LISTEN for, but when we're not SILENT within our inner being and Spirit, we ignore it or misinterpret it and then we feel confused and torn. So, I have experienced it as a waking me up from that daze and spell I'm feeling in the moments and present. For me it becomes more important to delay gratification and to come back to the REALITY of What I pictured (have been Creating) my life and VISION to be. It All aligns and flows without the struggle, because it's not forced into place as so often, people do in relationships. I wish you All, that You find Love, Happiness, and Peace within and without, love of Self and Love for Others, and Adventures All Around You! As I have grown with age, experiences, and time it has changed my beliefs, thoughts and attitude have grown too. So now " It's Follow Your Bliss and Re-Follow Your Heart, Listen to your Soul and trust your Source, Silent your fears and steady your waves, Sweep away your tears and all that enslaves, strip away the rules and myths of time, Life's a trip and then you die, so enjoy the ride its twists and turnarounds, Take a breath and wait to exhale as you surf the tide and dive the deep, find your Life's best ..is to just treasure This Moment in the PRESENT"
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You do NOT need to sleep with a man if you don't know how he feels about you!
But you got to go for a test drive lol
@Daniel H. my fiance passed away
hunniebe alexa But you need to know if he is can make you satisfied in bed because if he is boring as dead log then you’ll be frustrated as hell lol . 😁😁😁😉😉😉 You shouldn’t sleep to a guy and expect him to commit with you after because you’ll get hurt , you should decide to do that stuff as adult no blaming after it happened;)
You never need to sleep with a man!
Have women ever wondered what men would do if all women suddenly didn't base such a large portion of their self-worth on their body, without warning, in one day? And what if it was typical for women to say that they didn't like guys just because they were good in bed or know how to present themselves in a charming way in the first few weeks/months of knowing them while ignoring oxytocin, obviously remarking all of the sexual advances from men that would more-often be indulged after this just for the fun of it?
Wondering about pregnancy? No worries. *Abortion.*
What if women still talked about great sex, but with *NOTICEABLY less* excitement and expression? What is it those celebrity guys who get girls say to everyone when they get the girl(s), "She wants what I have"? And the guys base a big part of their self-worth on this, don't they? This is what they get praise for. Guys have built entire *careers* out of it to teach other guys *JUST TO HAVE WHAT WOMEN WANT.* What would they do if you didn't care about their swooning techniques & bedroom 'martial arts' and spent MUCH less time going on about it? Our countries would be going in very different directions, wouldn't they?
How would men react if this happened?
Is this not just a gigantic feminist chess-move that has been cooking for generations? Men would react in many ways, and panic would definitely be one reaction for many men if they have based their career on RELATIONSHIPS because they would suddenly have NO idea how to teach their consumers/students and their career would crumble.
Eh, who knows? I'm probably just crazy and I'm totally projecting an ulterior motive through these questions for my own benefit. Let's just say your assumption is justified. Why not? You don't have to be moved at all. You can just be safe with your pots of "gold." Stay where you are. You can even put words in my mouth if you want. I'll tell you, though, that being a visionary and having the courage to imagine things being different and better somehow refuels my faith in humanity; or rather in humanity's potential.
I'm grateful, I haven't slept with the man I care about. All of a sudden, it seems he either has a change of heart about me or has lost interest.
It's easier to cut off communication and walk away. When you haven't given him your all.
Yes!!
True
Yep!!
@@patricialee-adolfsson677 he is afraid of the friendzone. Good riddens you don’t need him
Don’t give men your all until there is a ring on your left hand
I've been in long term relationships where the love making is constant and satisfying (or as satisfying as it can get after some time) and the relationship can still fail. I think you really hit the jackpot when you find someone that is intellectually compatible with you as well as attractive (to you). That way when the hormones stop, you will still want to spend the rest of your life with that person cause you both see life so similarly.
Same here….it got to the point where if we didn’t have sex or had bad sex…it made me feel like the relationship was in a bad place 😩 little did I know the fact that I based our relationship on the sex cus that’s all he really offered was what made the relationship bad in the first place :(
@@katscandance same with my guy ... if no sex I feel like it is over
Married 50 years and we are still in love-not the same as the beginning but even deeper. ❤Staying power and commitment are the key.
His voice is so soothing and easy to listen to. Wise too. He should talk to high school girls before they go crazy.
This happened to me I was married to an abusive man when I met a young man at his work I was so nice and kind to him For some reason he started staring into my eyes constantly and I couldn't understand why Then I didn't see him for a few weeks at his work . Don't ask me why I started missing him and kept thinking about him all the time This never happened to me before I didn't go into that store for a couple of months , so I could get him out of my head . I bumped into him recently and asked me if I have divorced my husband yet , which I am going to do . I am old enough to be his mother but I look younger than my age I think he is a player lol
Hell no. Stop teaching girls relationships are a game.
Empress Qi He's not teaching anyone to play games. This guy is probably the most well informed, woman-empowering relationship expert I've encountered on RUclips. He's explaining how to avoid games and artificiality.
😂
CrZy du bist Indian i CH bist Sir Lanka
Best way to get a guy is to keep him guessing by marrying someone else.
LOL
You said it girl!!!!! I’m sure getting to that point now!
😂😂😂🤣😭
YEAHHHHHH
LOLOL
In the past, I fell in love with a guy who is not physically my type because he's always there for me and a good listener. After being intimate with him, I instantly felt more in love! He suddenly became handsome in my eyes!!!! 😂 So yeah. It's too dangerous.
Did u end up with him?if not wat happened
Same and we’re still together. 5 years
Omg Same.
Soooooo true!! Our dog's getting in the way
@@nik0l370 he’s an aspect of good karma in your life
Enjoy 😊
You do NOT need to sleep with a man to keep him interested in you or keep him from wandering. If you do, you shouldn’t be worried about him anyway.
💯
@@agentdark64 ummm literally no.
Well said. I can’t believe that in 2022 Women are being told to sleep with a man too stop him from straying.
That is why waiting to have sex is important. It's not lame to wait, it's science.
It's lame if people do it for arbitrary melodogmatic self-superior rigid moralistic reasons, for sure. However, yep, it's fascinatingly true that often scientific reality is the original basis for humans forming so many overblown rigid moralisms, and this is one of those cases. Yeah, sex impairs judgment, so when making big decisions, people should make the judgment (or at least most of it) before having the sex.
Brina Lee Well people get cheated on in marriages and very long term relationships all the time sooooooo.....????
Yup both waited until marriage best decision ever
True.Never give up the "diamond".Once a man got his orgasm,he cleans and go home like nothing happens.That is what marriage is for.unless if a girl is a prostitute,she'd take the money first.
Amen
Oxytocin nearly fucked up my life😂
Lol😂😂
Hahaha
😂😂😂
“Try to be the director of your thoughts and feelings, It’s not because you think or feel something it is the truth.” I needed these words - My anxiety has been high and I appreciate these words!
I overvalue everyone, so you understand how hard my life it is..in other words, I project my own kindness, consideration and forgiveness to others, unfortunately...people are not as good as we think 🤔
KAIJU MECHA sounds like you need to raise your self worth
I can relate. The struggle is real.
KAIJU MECHA...check out SheRaSeven1’s channel. She’ll set you straight!
Well Stop It!! 😘
Oh my GOD I have this same problem 🤦🏾♀️
My best advice don’t give em all. Love yourself first !!❤️
Very True
I don’t think it’s possible 🤔. Maybe just stop caring altogether. That’s the true secret. Do your thing and if someone wants to walk out...just let them. There is never a guarantee even about tomorrow let alone with human relationships.
Deepthoughts Herenow watch sheraseven girl she says the same
Danielle Jones Lol!!! That’s hilarious I’ve been watching her channel for years. LOV her!!!!!!!🌹🌷💐🌺🥀
Agreed. Especially with human relationships.
This is so true! And yeah sounds exactly like her 😂
Have you noticed the guys you don't want persue you the hardest? It's a catch and release game. Gotta be smart how you play it.
Personally I don't think it has anything to do with how the woman is. It's all about the man. If they're into other women look at other women and get intrested that's on them! Nothing to do with his partner or the other women.
Bob Salazar but it’s the man’s fault she’s not into him....
@Bob Salazar Good point.
I partially disagree. There are men will always be looking for someone else because they don't have the drive to settle on one woman but there are men who will start looking elsewhere because they don't like how they are being treated. Doesn't necessarily mean they will cheat but if they aren't satisfied with their partner they will be more inclined to become interested in other women or to look. Saying it's all about the man is pretty much saying you can't do anything wrong which isn't true at all. I've seen female friends drive their partners away because of their own behavior (being overly jealous, paranoid, controlling, nagging, demanding, not affectionate anymore etc) and then blame it all on them. Of course men do this too. As humans we can be controlled by our ego (I'd say most of us are) and when our ego is hurt it's hard to admit that we might have played a part.
I know quite a few women who have been cheated on (due to work) and I have to say, that for the most part, it is all on the man. Some men womanize, etc no matter how wonderful and beautiful their partner is and how much she meets his needs. Most of the women were shocked because everything in their relationship were great... both happy, shared goals and values, great friends, etc. I believe most cheaters are simply narcissists and the more they bond, the more he feels a need to look elsewhere to feel in control or because he’s entitled.
Bob Salazar You obviously haven’t dated many men. Lol.
Obviously it’s not the same with everyone. My boyfriend and I got physically close fast, but he still can’t get enough of me. I think it’s more about attitude than anything- if they need to go, they should go. Be confident, love you first.
Dont even marry anyone else. Love your home and surround yourself with everything filled with love in your home. Spend time alone with yourself and love you first
My husband left me 3 years ago. I had the mindset of what you said in your comment. I was perfectly fine, got over my husband.
Well, I started a new job and am extremely attracted to a man that isn't the right guy. I'm pretty sure he feels the same way. I have no control and I almost wish I would've never met him. I feel so lonely and sad now. I've been numb the last 3 years. But now I'm feeling lonely, vulnerable....
I don't understand how a crush can cause so many emotions in me. I want to go back to how I was.
I don't sleep with anyone and keep men in an arm's length and keep them guessing. I live my life and let them know if they need to be part of it then to work for it. Don't make him your life and give your self away. They don't appreciate they like working for it. Let them.
What a proud narc !
@@mia_maia and your point? If valuing yourself means being a narcessis to you then I guess I'm a proud one at that.
I wish you to meet a highly valuable and mature man one day.. but that crap won't work with him though.
@@a.b.2850 I have and he's amazing human being. Know your worth.
yes ....true. ...men love to work for it and they will appreciate u more ....when women give in to men easily they become bored and the relationship doesn't last
A man needs to work for what they want...value yourself
Intelligent persons will know the personality of a person before the physical connection. Commitment and stability is real.
But many persons are coward in commitment and stable relationships.
1:30 you are already wrong. I feel closer to a man when I see him making sacrifices for me and going out his way to make me happy. Whether it is genuine or not that makes me feel closer. I've been in sexual relationships where I've just felt it served it's purpose and I lose interest. A man that has invested in me has a better chance at keeping me interested. It's important to realize while in a relationship both partners will find others attractive. Also, if someone wants to cheat they will convince themselves why it's ok no matter how much sex you are having.
So true ...its the choice of the person not mine..
Cece E 💯🙌🏻
Great comment sex doesn't bond me to a man a guy who knows what he wants and can express it is more of a turn on to me
You are absolutely right
Off course there are some woman ... but overall the most woman has that problem!
Being single makes me happier
Scientifically and Emotionally, a woman will always tend to find excuses for guys and will subconsciously fall into these mistakes.. this video illustrated how Women in general act and react in a relationship. Very organised and delightful content. Thank you so much for this beautiful video. All the best for the new video..
No not ALWAYS. The chemical reaction happens, but we don't always let it bowl us over. As he pointed out you can step back and reflect rationally on the feelings, otherwise no one would ever say no to a potential partner that they're not compatible with.
Starts @ 6:40
I'm still confused was it simply make love to him and cuddle?
Thanks 😝
Shit I had missed it too 😂
@@celeste7469me too
Such a timely video. I just started a new relationship and flying high. I do not like this seeming lack of control of my feelings and frequently just want to run from the experience. After a painful divorce nearly 10 ago, I’ve had no interest of possibly going through the pain again. Here I am now getting to know an amazing man and freaking out about these “happy emotions”.
You are right..things he used to say that made me smile have less impact on me. I need more and more time to talk to him each day and he expresses the same need. Not to mention it is a long distance relationship, so the longing to see one another makes it worse.
Again my instinct is to run, solely because I’m scared of being hurt and falling from this high. He hasn’t done or
said anything that is a red flag. As a social worker, I’m constantly looking. Your information makes it easier to know where my feelings are coming from so I can manage it all. You’ve saved the day and possibly the relationship.
...i can relate completely!!!! allowing ourselves to "fall in love" can be such a terrifying thing.....how i cope with this perceived fear is i tell myself that if it doesn't work out i still have myself and my great life. i lived without him once and I can do it again! we will survive, as you are fully aware....all the best to you xo
Dawna , That’s exactly what I’ve been telling myself through the whole amazing time of getting to know him. I had a great life before and it will be just as great, no matter how this turns out. Love of “self” always comes first!! xo
@@open2417 yes, it does! xo
Enjoy it. I don't think I'll ever feel like they again. Embrace it.
I would suggest to try the unavailable period of two weeks let him know you are doing things to help other people in a compassionate way. Help disabled, elderly. Read the bible to children. Adopt a wise mom. BUT do stay in touch with him. Care about his conversation
The heart is deceitfully wicked above all things, who can know it!
Proverbs?
The Narrative Jeremiah 17:9
@@lizzyflip7578 Thank you
That's why people need to be more rational and have a long term perspective rather than being in they feelings all the time, only for instant gratification.
Great reminder!!!
Brian, I just wanted to say that I love your videos. You bring a down to earth approach to relationships that is so refreshing. All your videos have actual value, unlike lot of other dating advice videos on RUclips. Keep up the good work, Brian.
Toxitocin if he's a narsasist
Good one! Lol.
😆
LMAO dying
@@lolacookie453 😁😂
Nice 👍
VERY SMART....A LOT OF WOMEN DON'T KNOW ABOUT OXYTOCIN! RELEASE!! 🌈👁👁🌈
IN SHORT, IT IS WISE FOR WOMEN TO TAKE THEIR
TIME TO GET TO KNOW A MAN BEFORE THEY EVEN GO THERE! OR EVEN ASSUME , THE GUY IS RIGHT OR GOOD FOR THEM!!
new subscriber here. your voice sir is very calming. Its like im listening to a pastor. Full of wisdom.
I really do like the neurochemistry explanations you bring up. As a scientific person, I enjoy that part in your videos 👌🏼
SAAAMEE
I have a new one lurking in the background who is cute. I scream in my mind, "Oxytocin!" And " Stay out of bed, stay out of trouble," has been my mantra.
That's the hard part of falling in love for someone, to avoid sex to get to know them better.
Thank you Dr Brian, I really needed this. Coz I met a guy recently and feel super excited and happy when I'm with him. Now I understand why.
I don’t think I have ever commented on any of your videos Brian.., I really appreciate these... this one, especially, was very thought provoking... being a nurse, I really appreciate the physiological aspects of emotional attachments... thankful to hear “why” this happens... it makes so much sense now!!! We, as women, need to pay more attention to what is happening in relationships so that things will have positive -instead of negative outcomes... thanks again!!! 😊
Why would you advise a woman to make love to a man she isn't married to? Would you advise that to your daughter, if you have one?? This is why so many children grow up without fathers and women have several different baby daddies. Plus everyone knows the opposite occurs. Sleeping with a guy makes him less likely to stick around or marry you. Men lose respect and the awe for the woman after he sleeps with her. She loses value in his eyes.
I took it he meant that part for women who are already in relationships as it was in with the stuff about hairs in the sink.
Maybe because this isn't the 16th century lol. Someone shouldn't necessarily leap into sex right away, sure, there's a good basis for waiting a while, but marriage? Really? What a ridiculously arbitrary line to draw, and a totally unrealistic and excessively committed one which directly ruins people's lives with legal/financial drama, because people like you pressure them into signing a bunch of contracts before they can fulfill some basic physiological needs which enrich the relationship ... Just, seriously, yikes. Get with the times, and the science, and lay off the ridiculously archaic nonsensical rhetoric like recommending sex wait until marriage, or the absolutely inane part at the end where you're blatantly sexist against guys and making up myths about how they work. Your comment really helps no one, and perpetuates harms that affect men and us women alike.
women lose respect for a guy when he gives his attention for free to her. The same woman who is making you wait couldn't wait for Chad to get inside her. So just walk away and let them enjoy their cats.
@@mariobros7834 I'm really impressed at the advanced technology it must take for you to be able to press buttons on a keyboard when you're clearly a two-dimensional caricature of an actual being
Well it's a fornicator & those who believe in divorces world ; can't you see he talked this clip out for the Laws Of The Lands, which live by the carnal flesh of the mind , which are Natural for them to do, for the natural man do the things of the flesh; while the Spiritual man do that which is Spiritual & both are in contradiction with each other . As written , leave them alone for they both shall walk into the ditch
no if you understand man love pain and uncertainty. and if you are spiritualy under the influence of infinite spirit you will love your self more and will never put him on pedestal.
I never understand what's happening and why I did all this silly things that I already know It's not okay
Until I heard you
Thank you for this amazing explaining
You are a blessing! You are really helping me. I am guilty of that way of thinking. My relationship is hanging on by a thread, but i think we can work it out thanks to your advice.
This is probably the single most usefully informative video I've seen yet. Thanks, Brian!
I dont agree cimpletely. I met the love of my lufe who gives me still after 12 years all these hormones
Rosa Maria Ortiz Pino I'm not sure many of the people watching these videos will believe in soul mates. 🤷🏻♀️
I agree though 👏🏻
You are extremely blessed! It's a rare thing.
I experience this with someone I text with. We have never been on a date 🤦🏻♀️ so strange to have a huge crush on someone that is not interested enough to ask me out.
When u sleep w/ a man u release vasopressin which makes him feel territorial w/ u. Also, territorial of your place(Apt.) if that's where you're intimate.
Omg really?
Blind to their own beard hairs...yaaaa..😂😂
You're funny!!
Never to his girl's hair in the shower though. 🙃😉
It becomes hard after you feel like you’re being undervalued
Discovered that a similar feeling a few years back...and we hadn't even held hands! We have kept physical distance (we are both older adults) but text & phone are only 2 to 3 times a wk.
I think I’m in love with Brian Nox 😆
SAME 😂❤️
He's so cute, isn't he?
Brian just released oxytocin in my brain
Brian... your knowledge rings true based on my study and experience. I’ve watched nearly every video, not only for myself where I am, now, but to learn from mistakes of the past and prevent heartache in the future. I appreciate the work that you do, as it’s measured and results-oriented. Because of that, it’s as digestible to men as it is to women. That’s crucial, as to enact these lessons, both parties need to understand each step of the equation. Thank you!
Funny that some women think they're safe by being single or not sleeping with a man. You can create oxytocin just from holding hands or hugging. So are you going to never touch a man the rest of your life? 😂 you can't control your hormones. In the video he's saying you'll create oxytocin when you date or meet a guy, but don't mistake that for true love and don't become needy. He's not saying stay away and hide in a cave your whole life. He also didn't say sleep with everyone you meet.... He said IF YOU WANT TO it's a way of having a man bond with you. That's not something new, it's biology.
You just shifted my mind completely, I really appreciate it!
Thank you for the video..
It is hard finding videos about men being committed and not attracted to other woman once they are with a partner. Because the internet is full of videos about men cheating and trying to make it sound normal that men are made to want many woman...
I'm lucky to have a man who only have "eyes" for me.. Other woman just not do it for him..
i started watching your video because youtube recommends it but now i can't stop watching all of your videos, Thank you so much
You are perfectly right! I never have Sex during the First month! I want to get to know him before Oxytocin does its work 👍
This is why I have been so Reluctant to get in a relationship. I tend to just like dating more exciting
Happiness starts within ourselves, then a relationship people need to learn how to get know other good before those touching feelings starts and sex
I was about to sleep with a guy who Id wanted for ages, I walked out because the oxytocin was so high in me I didn’t know if i could handle any more. It was enough for now.
Stay by yourself. You have no problems. Being needy is not good. If you like being alone, don't get into a relationship. Nothing but arguments. It's actually good to spend time alone. It builds your confidence and self-reliance. You feel really proud of yourself if you can do things on your own. Less stress equals a longer life. Stress is a killer.
I ❤️ your videos. You have a unique way of getting your message across so we GET IT.
I’m learning so much and seeing so clearly the mistakes I have made in the past. Thank you
Awesome! Subtly i will absorb all of these... Been reflecting
the guy i was dating left me after being intimate maybe his oxytocin was out of order 🤔
LOL I laughed so hard, "out of order" 🤣🤣🤣
LOL I laughed so hard, "out of order" 🤣🤣🤣
I laughed so loud ' out of order'
I bursted out laughing!
I really don’t think sleeping with a guy will deter him from looking at other women
Do what makes you comfortable and confident. Lay and communicate your boundaries.
💖 Thank you ! This is the second day I am watching the video's and I watch them twice not to miss anything.
Just as much as hairs become invisible to men once they have been clipped or shaved from their skin, their socks and underpants become invisible once they have been removed from the body (hence, those items being left on the floor for indefinite periods of time).
thank you for incorporating science into this it really helps us understand the why in what we feel you’re a blessing thank you so much hope your kindness in helping us comes back to your tenfold ❤️🧿🙏🏽
This explains my worry about feeling love for my partner/husband of 37 years but not that rush of in love at the beginning. I was wondering if something was wrong with me. Due to mental (his family stole his inheritance which stole our plan for the future and his plans to take care of me) as well as physical issues we have dealt with the last few years we are no longer intimate. We hug and give each other a peck on the lips every day, but now I understand the distance I feel and can do something to change it. Thank you!!
@@smurfvolvo I'm the one with the money currently. He is the one that has mental issues related to his ability to provide and ED. Funny? NOT!
Diane Eby you're not a good digger..it's a man's duty to provide for his woman so don't feel bad for wanting what's best for you
@@successful363 You've missed the point of my message. It's not about the money, it was about the family struggle with the whole process. If you can't be positive and say something supportive, don't comment on others mental struggles.
@@beautymellz5600 he had mental issues because he felt he could not support me. He is old school. My responsibility for myself.
“If you want to keep your man from looking at other girls, try not falling in love with him in the first place! Then you won’t be jealous! Or try having sex with him! Guys like that!” -most videos on this subject matter
Amen to the overflow!! I love your channel, your content, your humor, and thank you for being so kind as well!!
❤
It actually feels good to be single than be mindful and tricky to keep him to myself ....
I wish i had seen this video sooner before making mistakes. But it's never too late to learn
I'm not sure I heard the second thing right. The first thing he said was that oxytocin keeps us glued to a man. Well, I was in a relationship for 10 years and I remember clearly that sex was the last thing that made me feel bonded to him although sex was one of my priorities in the relationship. After sex, all I felt it that my body was "happy", but my heart was intact although I am super sensitive. And cuddling was a no for me. It just felt wrong. I felt more intimate with him if he showed it with his actions.
The second thing I am not sure I heard correctly is that "men need sex to feel bonded and have their oxytocine levels rise"?? Like, if you have sex with him, he will feel the bond. Like, in what Universe? It is a recipe for disaster and let me take you for granted a bit. It is a VERY generalized advice and sex works if you are already fully committed. But as I said, sex did zero in my relationship.
Probably the best relationship video ever. Thank you!!!!!!!!!
thank you so much brian..now i understands why. i really learned a lot from your videos.keep posting new videos.
Brian. I think you are just Brilliant! Thank you so much- amazing how these simple techniques actually work.. and so quickly. !!
I get a lot of oxytocin from myself daily - I feel loved up with myself and life 24/7 and I don't think any guy can compete with that and meet my needs.
Asexualise My Asexual Life we need to bottle that!!!! If I could get the same oxytocin fix off my own self I’ll finally be able to get all my goals and aspirations accomplished! This business of feeling addicted to a Man for connection and love is very over rated and in more cases than not very disappointing and disillusioning. I’m 44 and just so over it!
@@madeinhisimage3447 Awww thank you so much. I self-date a lot which helps. I go out to the cinema and for meals on my own. I go out dancing on my own too. I be my own best coach to myself. Give myself a hug and a kiss. I am a hyper-romantic person and I see romance in most things. I even thing a gnome looks romantic - so cute most of the time. I am a Disney girl and like dressing up for myself. I like looking beautiful for me. When I go to the cinema, it's one of the most magical feelings in the world, especially with myself. I think I am living that fairytale that people say you can't have in a relationship, so if I can't get that from being with a guy, when I get that feeling from being with me, then what's the point? I think I will be unhappy, unless I really do find a guy who wants the type of magical world of quirky feeling that I live in. It may be unrealistic to get that from a guy, but if I get that from myself and I exist, then why is it so hard to find a guy like me, who wants to maintain that feeling with me and for me naturally, because he loves that too. I don't want to go back to a 'normal' boring life and be miserable. I love being in my own magical world, theme parks, zoos, aquariums, Shrek Adventureland, a theatre show, or just simply watching a kids movie at kid's club at the weekend - love doing that! The more I talk about this stuff, the more I just want to keep my life the way it is in this regard and keep improving others areas of it and myself. Why should I settle for any less of a fairytale world that I currently enjoy? Ludicrous. Sacrifice my world for a world more 'normal', no thank, I would be so bored after a short time. I like my candle to burn brightly. The world is your oyster as a solo artist of life, which I am currently better and happier with. I just miss kissing as guy if I am honest, that is it, and I can't just do that with anyone, it has to be a guy I feel safe around and am highly aesthetically attracted to - which is usually mostly younger foreign guys. I think you will accomplish all your goals, ambitions and dreams, go get 'em!
I Love this!!
@@KandyKoatedKrafts Thank you Kandice x
@@AsexualiseMyAsexualLife I am exactly the same ! Always happy in my own company and prefer to go out and holiday alone (often feel guilty for not asking friends along !) I also miss kissing and cuddling if I'm being honest but the cons to being in a relationship far outweigh the pros to me. I'm so self sufficient and secure that it would take someone very special to ever change my mind. Thought I was the only person in the world who felt this way !!
Excellent insight! Thank you Brian! ❤️
I need some oxytocin right now 😂😂😂
Hi all! I made a guy angry by asking him why he worked so much and for long hours. It's weird to my mind how could someone went mad. Honestly, I felt a bit of empathy because I used to work for long hours too, was tired or annoyed. I didn't ask with the feeling of mothering him, I asked to know why. Apparently he hates that question because others used to advice him on he shouldn't work that long. That was he told me. Of course I still don't know why he works so much. End of story
WOW! I SOOOO needed this video just at this moment. Thanks so much for putting this out!
Loved the cheeky comment about beard hair 😁
You give the best relationship advice ever! 😍😍and you’re the cutest you always make me laugh! Men really don’t notice most messes they make hehe.
I really like you Brian, your soft-spoken voice makes me feel good 👍
Thank you Brian for your very interesting and clear to understand videos. Regarding this one, I suffered a lot during the years I was with my ex as even if we were making a terrific love together, he was always looking at attractive women and had a eye connection with them in my presence... we finally broke up because of that mainly. At the beginning I could not trust what I thought I saw but after a while it was obvious... he answered that it was not true and when he was joking with them, he was asking me You made me happy should I have become dull ??
This happened to me this week! I thought I was crazy. Oxytocin. I see. 😂
U can't do anything to prevent him from flirting with other girls if he wants to. Get rid of him very quickly.
Holy shit!
Thanks for clearing it up Brian. That's why I'm hooked on this miserable loser with the sweet hugs and cute smile.
Your awesome I really like what you say and the way you express yourself I love listening to your advice
how much time does it take to get out of this phase and start seeing him for who he really is?
Another gem 💖💖💖 Thank you so much Geert!
After sex women get attached, guys run! 🤣
I had no idea!!! Im really impressed. It makes sense
Simple trick treat Men as desert.itz good if he is around,but you are not needy of them at all.Have your own life.people will come,people will leave.Who meant to be there will be there no matter what.The one who want to leave will leave no matter how much emotionally intelligent you become.
Really...guess what...we women fall out of love for men too. How about a video about how men should act to attract a woman.
It takes 2 to tango.. he should be worried about losing someone like me... know ur worth and don't settle for less. If I'm gonna waste energy everyday thinking of how to keep him interested, he's not worth it...better for him to man up and do his share of the work... equal give and take.
Sorry for the bulldozerish intonation, guess I'm just stirred up by this topic. :)
Thank you so much for this video. Now I understand myself more and why I want to be with him all the the time for me this is crazy I have only had one hug from him once and that was over a year ago and I only get to see him once a week and then we can only talk because we can't be alone together we have no privacy I don't think he remembers our hug. And because of the the circumstances we have to meet in we are very restricted we have rowed split up then come back together again a lot of times but we both love each other I am hoping our situation changes for the better. Now I understand the reason for my craving for him there are a lot of beautiful women where I am and he flirts with them this hurts me and I wish I wasn't having to cope with this I wake up in the night thinking of him I have to fight texting him too many times this is driving me crazy 😭
Move on! Find someone that can make you happier, like when you were younger and trusted your gut instinct. Still the same process.
After 2 yrs nearly consistent texting/talking we're meeting for the first time in his country in Nov. He says he wants to cuddle me, hold me, and more. Very sweet. I guess we'll see what happens. We push and pull, and until we meet in person too hard to tell what will result. I'm super excited to travel 7,800 miles to see him.
That's super cute. Anything can happen but I've heard great stories from people who met and grew close through long-distance relationships like that. Best of luck!
How was it?
@@marjoriea9079 Going in early Nov. -- springtime in Cape Town! 😊
@@ItsAsparageese I guess since not physically together we share more of the deeper parts of ourselves. We make each other laugh a lot too. Its said a man falls in love with his eyes, a woman with her ears. Mutual attraction and I love his Afrikaans accent, and he likes my NYC accent!
Are you sending him money?
Isn't all this advice just exactly what Christianity, Islam, and Judaism have always said? Basically, no sex before a serious commitment called marriage? Atheists don't seem to realise that these traditional attitudes actually protected women from unscrupulous men, unwanted pregnancies, and horrible feelings of insecurity. I'm not saying all religious marriages are happy, but I do think there is a higher chance that the wives will be happier than in the misogynistic culture we have now, which evaluates women solely by how they look, (a very masculine outlook), and not by other lasting and much more important qualities they might have.
I dont think i have ever been blind to the faults of guys ive been in relationships with. But rather chosen to accept him or fall for him despite his faults. I know now (age 40 & with one divorce behind me) that is pretty sad. I mean, to give them loving excuses. With the end result being them giving me a broken heart or an unfullfilling relationship. I cant even say I was blind... I saw it and yet I rode the oxytocin high. Perhaps I should be more forgiving of myself? I was high on the hormones & wished rather than belived for the relationship to work just because oxytocin etc feels pretty nice?.. Now I try to keep my eyes more "sober" and less accomodating to faults that affect me negatively. We all have faults of course, no one's perfect. But really need to keep an eye out for faults that effect me negatively or that can be borne without too much discomfort. Someone else said, you need to be able to stand the guy, even on his bad days. That's when it will work.
Same here, I've seen their faults but accept them if I feel it's worth it, sometimes that has come back to bite me
I have heard it before, and I think it's some of the best and simplistic advice ever. It has saved me from bad choices and the wrong men. If you we're to have a Son with the Man, just ask yourself if he turned out exactly like the Man that you are feeling this attachment to, " would you be PROUD of the Man your Son would one day grow up to become"? You alone will feel the answer from your heart that Your Soul has been trying to get you to LISTEN for, but when we're not SILENT within our inner being and Spirit, we ignore it or misinterpret it and then we feel confused and torn. So, I have experienced it as a waking me up from that daze and spell I'm feeling in the moments and present. For me it becomes more important to delay gratification and to come back to the REALITY of What I pictured (have been Creating) my life and VISION to be. It All aligns and flows without the struggle, because it's not forced into place as so often, people do in relationships. I wish you All, that You find Love, Happiness, and Peace within and without, love of Self and Love for Others, and Adventures All Around You! As I have grown with age, experiences, and time it has changed my beliefs, thoughts and attitude have grown too. So now " It's Follow Your Bliss and Re-Follow Your Heart, Listen to your Soul and trust your Source, Silent your fears and steady your waves, Sweep away your tears and all that enslaves, strip away the rules and myths of time, Life's a trip and then you die, so enjoy the ride its twists and turnarounds, Take a breath and wait to exhale as you surf the tide and dive the deep, find your Life's best ..is to just treasure This Moment in the PRESENT"
If you want a man to choose you above all other women. Lead him on while keeping him in the friend zone 🙄 they love that shit lol 😂