I broked up in last month and doing no contact since 10 days ...i talked to her best friend about whole situation and now she's on my side to help me in getting my ex back ...her best friend advice me That what if we together make her jealous by making her curious and anxious that her best friend is showing interest in me....and want to be in relationship with me Does it gonna work
Vinay Singh that will only make matters worse! I would NOT recommend doing that. Just stay no contact and work on yourself. Any tactics to try and make an ex jealous may backfire!
Finchopolis I am still not sure, not sure if there’s a soul there either. I always knew she had an empathy issue she can turn on the charm on and off too easily. Possible Sociopath...
Yesterday I had a dinner with my ex after 2 years and 3 months after breakup. I've been in no contact from day one, he reached out several times but with no direct wish to meet/ repair things. I also made no mistakes like begging etc. as I saw breaking up as major betrayal from his side. The words he said yesterday LITERALLY repeat what Craig has always said: "Initially your silence and respecting my decision were relieving for me but with time it has become the worst punishment. I really hoped that you would call and lash out but you never did..." You can imagine how speechless I was. He wants to see me again but now it is my turn to decide if it is right for me. I am in a fantastic place internally right now as this time has brought me tremendous growth in spite of awful pain I experienced.
Man move on, she can’t find another one like you in two years and that was the real reason she came back. For me if she leave me to find another one that is the point of no return.
I like what Margaret said, “if you’ve been attached to someone you can’t just detached from them unless you grieve” so if your ex have loved and cared for u at one point in their life, they can not totally move on unless they process the loss of you, and if they’re in a rebound they are just delaying the grieving process.
My ex grieved the relationship while she was still in it. She would randomly start crying and ask me to hold her. I thought maybe she was going through some family issues...nope. She was crying because she was letting go of me while I was sitting there trying to make her feel better. She finally left me when she vastly improved her life and I became "not good enough" for her. She came over, broke up with me, went to a friends house and then to a football game the next day. It's been a month and half and I've heard nothing from her. I don't think I ever will. It almost feels like she's using my pain to motivate and improve her life even more.
@@emanuelmarcus4602 then you should also use your pain to motivate yourself and improve your own life. make it about you, not her. work on yourself and move on. life's unfair, people rarely treat us the way we deserve to be treated but there's nothing we can do. we can't control what others think or how they feel, so our only option is really to try and use all the shit that happens to us in our favour. I know your comment is 8 months old and I really hope you're over it now, but I'm in that situation right now. my ex of 3 years got a cool job and started meeting cool people and all of a sudden realised he didn't need me anymore. I tried HARD to get him to change his mind but he wouldn't take me back, and roughly a month after we split, I heard he'd already started seeing someone else. I cried every day for 2 months straight until I decided enough was enough, cut all contact with him and started working on self improvement (in my case through studying, going to therapy, improving my art and exercising). one month in, I realised I no longer wanted to be with him. I feel no anger towards him, I just feel that I deserve better. it's not an easy process and it certainly doesn't happen overnight, but it is the ONLY way
@@Polly1589 That sounds awful, I am sorry for you. But tbh I think you can grieve in advance just to a certain degree. Image you know someone close is going to die, you can prepare for that moment when they will pass, you can cry and be sad before but once they are gone it hits differently and often isn’t the way you thought it was going to be
shav12 my ex has a new bf and she definitely grieved. If they get someone new they are just delaying the grieve. Mine writes me every few months and it’s every single time about her being sorry for breaking my hearth and that her new bf is being abusive. Last time she wrote me was this Thursday and she told me she isn’t over our relationship.
Anyone that can turn cold and unrecognisable - and unable to communicate like an adult, is either hiding something, or they are emotionally immature in my opinion.. I value loyalty - seems to be sadly lacking these days.
Idk It was hard at first to go no contact but it's been 3 1/2 months and I'm not hurt about it anymore I actually feel very much ok with it. Though I do love him I focused on God and let myself heal and fully accepted change is ok. Honestly if he come back ok and if not ok. Can't control the future so left it alone, gave it to God and feel amazing 🤗
I have been in no contact for 1 and a half months. She reached out to me about a week ago and told me "she has been concerned about me", "she was honestly so surprised I didn't reach out to her" and that "she felt we hadn't talked through the breakup". I told her I appreciated the thoughtfulness and that she is welcome to meet with me when I am back in town, she said she'd "Love that". Thank you Coach! Regardless of how our eventual discussion turns out, I feel happy, healthy, and more secure than I ever have.
you guys really need to do a lot more on short term relationships and breakups ... 3-4 months.. the beginnings of falling in love then having it all come to a sudden end! Hurst's more than my 18 year marriage ending..
I rather breakup the first couple of months than years later after having a child and stuck dealing with co parenting and moving out plus splitting the baby time on the holidays so are yall sure breaking up during the first couple cut your losses and move on at least you can just move on without having a child or something legally binding to that person
So much truth in this. I was also married before but actually recently had a breakup after ~2 months which hurts so much worse and affects me so much more. Just glad I'm not alone because this doesn't make sense 😅
Look, there are nearly 8 billion people on this earth. No matter how much your ex meant to you, he or she is not the only one you can have a relationship with. If you were dumped as a man, man up and get on down the road. Either she comes back or she doesn’t but do NOT wait for her. You will miss so many cool broads while waiting for the one who didn’t value you when she had you. Plus, she may never come back and you have to understand that, but living on a prayer will only hurt you. Stay strong, happy New Year!!
True, move on... if the relationship is not mutually sacrificial, then it’s toxic. Take that 8 billion and cut that in half to separate genders so that’s 4 billion. Take that 4 billion and cut that in half,considering the already married/taken people so that’s 2 billion. Take that 2 billion and cut that in half, for those that adults are not able to marry or be in a relationship, 1 billion left. Take that 1 billion and cut that in half for those that are minors (underage) that’s 500 million left. Take half out to narrow it down that interests are different, that’s 250 million. Out of that Take half out that fall within the age group u prefer (obviously 8 billion ppl are not all over 21), that’s 125 million, so let’s take out half for those that are just not compatible and that’s 62 million 500 thousand, take that and divide into the preferences you are looking for: religion, eye color, hair color, political preferences, hobbies, nationality, education, financial level,physical stature, height, language, with kids, no kids, married before, never married, virgins, etc. and what are you left with? My point is, it dwindles down and it feels like there is not enough good, quality, connections there are out there to make. Definitely not the 8 billion number range. The ones remaining and seeking should work on themselves, get your mindset better, get your emotions more grounded. Value yourself that if one of those dwindled down 8 billion breaks your heart, it’s easier to recover and change for the better. Change to be a better person, if not for the next relationship but for oneself.
You're right but sometimes if people think that they can rekindle things then they should. If people think that this particular person has future potential they have a right to 'indirectly' pursue one more time. If things don't work out, then yes... there are so much fish in the sea!!!
It was great. It was beautiful. He understood me. I messed up. I let my insecurities control me. I allowed someone to convince me my ex was someone he wasn’t. I finally let him go. I still feel ❤him. I’m just living life without him.
I am on Day 1😢 i just cry n cry but wont let him know no matter how much i want to call i aint doing it. He beat me chwat n i always forgive but now i am The bad one of how i been tracking of his actions.
It's getting harder and harder to not text him that I miss him. I really want him back and my whole world was just destroyed when he broke up with me. I just want to hug him. I miss our cuddles and staying up watching TV together. I hope he misses me too even though I doubt he does. I'm so scared that he is completely over me. I really want him back. I hope he changes his mind.
I think about these same things a lot. I wish i could hug him and watch tv or a movie and snuggle up like we used to. But I know he won’t feel or miss these things because he avoids these negative feelings. I’m tired of feeling hurt because of him.
I did the handwritten letter within the first few days of the breakup... ugh...Then I found these videos. It's been a week since he broke off the engagement and I'm on day 4 of NC. It's tough man.
Update? My heart goes to you. I'm blessed mine was long distance so I didn't have the chance to do the very very bad things like stalking or handwritten letters
D30 Was distraught and experienced first panic attack today....... Have a lot of work to do on myself but I swear your videos help so much Craig! Thank you for everything you do for us.
It's ridiculous to assume that "the one who did the breaking up" is less hurt, because there is very likely a painful reason they HAD to end things, not by choice, but because they were being treated badly or they were cheated on, so they had no choice b/c to stay would destroy their self-respect, or their sanity.
Bullshit, i dont mean you are but the excuse is. While there are silly people who show you their true colours. There is more than enough afraid little boys and girls (emotional maturity) that this is not true
Most break ups don't happen for these reasons, and obviously dumpers usually don't feel as hurt. Especially right after the break up. Unless they actually had to break up while still having feelings for their partner. Which is pretty rare
I broke no contact and she said that the past few weeks that she was "severely depressed ". I asked her why, she said because she hurt me and fear of losing me..She even sent a note and said she thinks about me often and misses me.. I made a mistake and wrote a letter after that and talked and text back and forth. She said in a text that she was afraid I'd try to rekindle and shed have to say no. I'm no contact once again....This is a relationship that started in November 2020.. It's a LDR but we were together often and made many memories quickly. My heart is broken...
Its almost 6mos but it feels like it still the day she broke up with me. 🙁 She reach out yesterday asking about the password of my account. What to do? 😑
6 months on & you get clarity... kicked to the kerb , lost everything apart from myself & with the help of my good friends & family, I gotten through the worst & moving on xx
@@songsforsale427 too late.. Already give it to her thru viber. Just the plain password. No other messages from me. I think its just a direct indirect message because she did not open the account. I know because that account will show when is the last log in. I miss her so badly and i still cry😭😭.
I have to disagree with stating the dumper doesn’t have a support system. In my experience, especially with this last painful breakup, he knew for a long while he’d breakup with me and had a support system ready for him. Meanwhile I was left alone, in shock, and too embarrassed to reach out to anyone. I’ve had to manage all of this on my own with the exception of all the confusing “getting your ex” back videos.
Walking away from my ex was a no brainer after getting broken up with over email after 7 years together. I value myself way too much to get treated like that. How my ex may feel doesn't compare to how much better I deserve.
DonnaNoble MD .... mine was going into 4 years and he lined the next girl up and ghosted me. No emails, no voicemail, nothing. Happened around the time I got hit by a car too... after that I think I was just pretty disgusted and turned off by his behavior. So no thoughts about wanting him back, think I deserve better than that. I’ve blocked him since. If he can’t even handle a breakup like a mature adult, I don’t think I need to expect too much from him. I saw his true colors, end of story. I hope I learn from my experience to learn to have Better judgement and to heal my attachment trauma so it doesn’t happen again.
@J J people do weird things. A lot of humans can't handle guilt, so they do whatever they can to have the easiest way out for themselves. That said, definitely grateful to have walked away with immediacy, strength beyond what I thought I'd ever have.
I ended my connection with someone I love very much but I didn’t feel I was priority and I have expressed it as much as I could - I’m forcing myself to no contact. It hurts because the person is not reaching out to me to try to mend this or work it out and it’s making me feel I was right in feeling I wasn’t a priority. I can’t pursue. I have value to the right person that will fight for us. If there is no contact then the person is not the one meant to be. I just need to move onwards.
Yes, you did the right thing. I wish l did that because l felt l wasn't his priority. I hung in there and it ended badly. He found someone else & left me, but l wish l left him first
Topkat I’m so sorry for the pain of your experience :( Hurt people hurt people. Just remember it was just him that didn’t know how to love you and it is his actions thereafter prove to you he wasn’t worthy for you nor could he see the true value of all you could have offered. Stay strong... heal... and never settle for anything less than a champion for your heart.
I ran into him today at the gym, last time I saw him was almost a month ago, we talked, he seemed happy to see me, or he was just being polite, I was being cheerful. I hope I can find a way to somehow show him that I can now see why he broke up with me (he said he wasn't happy anymore, I can see now it was because of my anxiety) and that I'm DOING THE WORK to improve myself (have bought your first 5 workbooks) and become the best version of myself. I love him so much, and I know he loves me too, we were together for 3+ years, but I'm afraid that if I can't help him see that I'm finally changing, that it won't cross his mind to come back. And tbh, I wouldn't consider it coming back, either, if I were him... I was quite a bitch... Hope everyone is feeling a little better each day, hang in there fellas!
Wow! I have A LOT of respect for you after reading your comment. Honest. I hope one day soon to be where you are inside with all of this. Similar situation here. Thank you for your post and my sincerest best wishes for you going forward!
@Andrew Peters In regards to your response to Cecilia k. You are so right as to the power of admitting/expressing just that. A LOT OF POWER! He'll of an observation, Andrew!
My ex is DEFINITELY not feeling any of these feelings you've mentioned. She is very good at 'switching off' and crack on without being troubled by her decision. She texted me to say I can't do this anymore, it's best if we call it a day....after 8 months dating/together. She says no longer loves me, only as a friend and it stops there. As much as I would love to believe she is going through all of the above mentioned in your video, she is perfectly fine by her decision and happy. Now that's annoying, if only I was a fly on the wall in her house to see what she's like since breaking up with me.
Daughter going through heartbreak. Watching your videos and sharing the information with her. She has gone no contact. First time she has ever handled a break up this way. Hopefully it works.😊
It will work. She may not get him back but she will go stronger and heal faster. But it’s not just about going no contact but also about taking space to learn and grow and do personal growth. You either get the ex back or find someone new. Either way it works and you win.
It's impossible to say when the pain will end, but it WILL become less and subside in time. It depends on many factors. The most important thing to do is acknowledge what you feel and process it. Don't let it dominate your daily life if possible, but truly experience what you feel and look at things from both a rational and emotional perspective to see the whole picture of the relationship and what it meant to you. Your post was 2 months ago. How are you feeling now?
She broke up with me over letter...typed even lol. Never responded after she sent it. The first couple of weeks really suck but after awhile it honestly gets 100x better.
My ex was very passive aggressive and gave me the silent treatment regularly if we had disagreements. So this is really no different. He never wanted to connect and that’s why we broke up in the first place. Good riddance.
I actually broke things off w my xbf. I didn't not want him in my life. I wanted him to change. We were still seeing each other 3 years later and I hoped we were getting back together. Then he met his current woman. He's been w her 3 years. I know he still misses me and I miss him too. My heart has done a full 180. I took so much for granted. Nobody else I date even compares to him. Hopefully in time your x will feel the same way about you. I wish you the best.
I understand all this... but when they were your bestfriend and lover and is your whole world... what's one supposed to do... it's human nature! - How one gets from that to being enemies is beyond me and as far as I am concerned it's completely F'd up! How much space does someone need... how much time is enough... seriously... by that time the dumpie would have moved on and quite possibly no longer want's them in their life... that's the big conundrum.... see F'd up! THIS WHOLE THING IS COMPLETELY CONFUSING AND SERIOUSLY, WHAT'S THE POINT! It's over and nothing will fix it! Why would your ex reach out ? They left. Their choice and what's done is done. Especially when you know that's their attitude towards life. " My choice is made and there is no going back, it's final!" - What do you do when they say that and you know they mean it ?? Case closed... move on. DONE!
You.take care of yourself. Do what you.have to do to find peace in your broken heart. Most of all.keep hope in your heart. You loved once.you can love again.
My ex has been very friendly, flirtatious and tactile towards me. He was very complimentary and offered to buy me a drink. I went NC after he dumped me by text 5 months ago and have been focusing on myself. I’ve bumped into him twice - Nov and Christmas at social gatherings) I was cool, calm and collected. He mentioned that we should ‘catch up!’ He sent a NY text. I replied and a few messages exchanged. He said that he’s going to call me!! What does this mean? An apology, interest, curiosity..?? I’m not sure whether he’s seeing someone else. Not sure I want him back and feeling a bit confused.
Play it cool. Wait until they make a commitment. If they want sex its a personal decision for you. But if you are not ok with fwb they need to tell you they want to comeback.
My ex wrote me on Thursday night and she compared me a lot to her new bf. She says she thinks she is in a toxic relationship. She also told me she isn’t over our relationship and she kept comparing us telling me about all the bad things her new boyfriend does which I never would’ve done. But she also says she doesn’t want to break up with him because she loves him and she isn’t sure if she still likes me that much. She wrote me a lot of messages she instantly deleted so I could see them but her boyfriend can’t. She said it’s not very grownup hang on something from the past. Over the time of me and her writing she said we would be like soulmates. So to summarize it: she thinks I have a lot of better trades then her bf does, but she still loves him even to he is abusive.
my ex put a restraining order on me because I got upset. I hit the refrigerator and yelled at her. Im stupid and ashamed. But she kicked me out of the house, got a new boyfriend all in 1 week of the fight....weve been together for 3 amazing years.....this all happened so fast. I hope she talks to me one day. i will always love her. no matter what she does to try and hurt me...she also killed my cannabis plants on purpose to upset me. its so messed up.
If they lined up somebody else, that is when you know its TRULY OVER. You should never take them back because you should never be a second choice or a plan B. You are worth more than that.
Am struggling with no contact after two weeks. So unsettled and separation anxiety. It’s physically and emotionally painful and I’m struggling to detach and disconnect. I can’t think clearly with this brain fog. My heart hurts and he’s caused so much damage. I have to watch these videos daily and have constant contact with family and friends to feel safe. This is torture
I broke-up with a man who was the love of my life, but he did not want to spend the time with me that I needed, so I broke up with him. Shortly afterwards he had a heart attack. I always felt that the brake-up was responsible. That thought stays with me to this day.
Thank you coach!!! You guys are the best 💕💕💕💕. 30 days not contact today. I’m devastated it. I can’t believe that we cared so much about each other and now he acts like he doesn’t care. I know he loves me and I love him very much. I don’t know if I ever want to go back with him, because I don’t want to get my heart broken anymore. I want to move on and be happy again with myself. I was very much happy before I met him and my life was good. Now my life is a shitshow and I can hardly get out of bed. Tomorrow I’m forcing myself to go to the Gym and start taking care of myself. I need to recover myself. I don’t want to be like the people in other comments that after 1 year, 2 years, 3 years... still hanging on their ex... NO NO NO... I’m still dreaming on us getting back together and dreaming that he will contact me but I don’t know if I can ever trust that he will not dump me again... I’m moving on...
Thanks guy's, i'm in the early process of no contact here & struggling like not sleeping much, loosing weight. But thank you for giving me faith & your video's are slowly helping me.Thanks again!!
i really want my ex back even though i think about her as a heartless and selfish person, i think she doesnt think about me, she doesnt care what will happen to me, she's probably just talking to other people because she said she wanted to be alone but is always online... i really want to stop... i really want to stop loving her... why cant i, why is it so easy for her to just forget me and leave me to die, why is it so easy for her and so hard for me, why do i still love her after all this pain, cutting and starving myself
10:15 😂 that made me chuckel haha, its been 8 days since the breakup, and 7 days of no contact for me. I'm doing much better having so much insight from this channel, I've started focusing on myself more and putting less focus on her. I think I've done the hardest parts of grieving so far, however next week might be difficult with my bday and valentines coming up. I hope I can glide through those days in a good way
He told me everything he was going through a week before he broke up with me. I was really understanding since he was really stressed and going through alot. I was the only person he was close to and he knew he wasnt doing all he could for me anymore. When he eventually broke up with me i told him he needed to do this to make changes in his life and to do something for himself finally. I didn’t cry alot and just kept my feelings out of it and encouraged him to do the right thing and also told him i care about him and to take care of himself. He stressed that he wants to be in my life still and text but i told him that I cant do that now. So i have only texted him once and we broke up 2 days ago, i am now leaving him alone to better himself and I know I have to work on myself too. I love him so much but i also stressed if he wants back in my life he needs to really tell me as i wont try . He said pretty much he would come back eventually but i wont hold on it. I hope he finds himself but im letting him go until the time is right thank you for your videos
He's a coworker. I'm an empath. He doesn't have to say a word. I sense everything just by his presence. Right now, he's frustrated with me not paying attention to him. He's with someone else. I will continue to work on myself while he contemplates the decision he made letting me go.
It was all working out amazing... We had some great moments together.... But one day she told me that there's a lot of peer pressure on her and she wants to live alone and told me to manage somehow.... I sorta begged her. But she didn't listen and went her way... On that day I went home and uploaded some quotes as story like (Cry only for cuts and stitches and not for bastards and bitches) ... I was very angry and uploaded these just because of my anger.... Few days later I came to know indirectly that she was really hurt with my quotes... And she had a thought in her mind that I'm taking a revenge on her...... I literally want her back and there's a slight possibility too considering the great times we had together.... Watching your videos and I'm in the no contact period from that day onwards.... I see her everyday (common workplace) and maybe she has moved on... .not sure... Pls help me out .... Should I stay in the no contact period ?? It's been like about two months ... Okay update : I just came to know that she's in a relationship with someone ( who was her friend ) ... And her new boyfriend texted me if I'm okay with this.... I replied very calmly that I'm okay and it's her decision after all..... But when I looked at his pic I laughed like hell.... But inside I was hurts like hell...
I was the one who broke it off, but it still hurts. I love him, but he wasn't giving me what I needed--his time. He is on the road for work a lot, but we talk a lot throughout the day so I miss him. I just can't accept the breadcrumbs anymore. I need more, though it hurts now.
Aisha Naushahi I’m so sorry! I know how hard it is. My ex and I have remained in communication. Some days I’m not sure if that’s a good idea or not. He just kept trying to contact me and I gave in because I do love him still. But I’m open to meeting the one God has for me.
Aisha Naushahi I’m sure the workbooks will help tremendously! These coaches know what they’re talking about. By the time you’re finished, you may not even want him back. By the way, I’m sure he misses you too. But sometimes we need a lot more than someone can give us. You’re worth a lot and you need someone who will recognize your worth!❤️
This is me exactly! I had to do the break up, for my mental health as things she said and did made me insecure, needy and jealous to the point I tried to take my own life. I have so many mixed feelings daily. We tried to stay in contact, then I did a month no contact, I broke it, called her, said text after saying it was nice to hear my voice, good to talk. Texting wasn't good, so I had to tell her I couldn't stay in contact anymore. It's been 3 weeks now. Still feels like day 1!
So many mixed signals. Also, Coach Craig was right on about direct-indirect. Remember, life waits for No one. Live yours, if your ex decides they want to be a part; it's up to you.
I needed to know my ex will be hurt as well, although I don't believe she will be my level of deep in sadness (I really dipped to the lowest pit of hell).
I never dated this person (i.e. we have been best friends for a few years and together almost all of the time) and he was in love with me, but when I fell in love with him he had lost feelings for me. He said he loved me but was not in love with me anymore. I think I had gotten a bit too dependent on him and that was maybe a turn off. He is a good man. I tried no contact (not sure if it works in these situations), but he would initiate contact once in a while and is still nice to me. I acknowledged my mistakes and went away for a month. It has been four months. Is it possible to still revive those feelings in him? He is acting like "just friends". Thank you for your videos! You guys are amazing! :)
Broke up with my partner a month and half ago... I didn most the mistakes you shouldn't do, finally did some no contact, only for a short while because something happened, and I swallowed my pride and reached out. They get back with me shortly and we ended staying the night with each other. It was amazing, he agreed, and I know there's still a spark there. Unfortunately he seems to be set on not being with me still. Feel shitty for being good enough to lay with but not be with him. I told him I out my foot down on friends with benefits a long time ago. It hurts to walk away, but told him if he changes his mind, give me a holler. Until then I'm focusing what I want and need for myself. I have to accept he may never reach out too and that's terrifying, but I know Im worth more then what was going on.
I can't be the only one who isn't sub and or following the Instagram to not let your ex know what you're up to while in no contact while working on yourself and or getting them back XD
It’s so true because I was the one that broke up with him and I feel horrible. I think I’m grieving more than him. I’m in pain and want to reach out to him but I’m so strong-willed I will not. I need to take a stand. He did reach out to me with the “hey” and a “what’s up” text. I replied hours later with a “do you miss me? I know you do” text and he replied “you are the disappearing queen”. I haven’t responded and it’s been 3 days and he hasn’t either but I know he will be contacting me first again. I’m too strong now, he made me this way all the hurt, heartache, and heartbreak now I’m numb to it all. I still miss him, I’m still in love with him but emotionally I’m exhausted and it is not healthy for me to continue on this way and although it hurts so bad and cuts like a knife I have to make the decision to move on with my life.
Don Smith He loves to play mind games and I’m so tired of it. Over these last few months I have done a lot of soul searching and I have healed and totally over him now. over the past few months he has been calling me but I’ve been ignoring all of his calls. It’s too funny because I just got a text from him last night out of the blue it was a Nelson Mandela quote talking about holding grudges, being bitter and angry lol. He thinks I’m bitter and angry when really I am not...I seriously like moved on. Life is so short to be still playing these childish games and I know that there is so much better out there for me. You know what I’m saying?🙂
Got broken up with 4 days before our anniversary for something i did, i was going to do the grand gesture and handwritten note for our anniversary , thankfully watched your videos ... hes actually the one who told me to watch you.. im trying to do no contact but he reaches out to me for random things maybe one /2 times a day . Our lives were so intertwined its hard to seperate everything abruptly... as soon as i feel im making progress i hear from him again and i just have an anxiety attack.
Shana.... if the pictures are correct in your profile then you are beautiful and you do not need to wait on some guy that let you go... go find someone else which will be easy for you
Dana Bacon same here I never thought that a girl would have so much power over me. It’s just a horrible feeling to go through this kinda pain. I even dream about her almost every night. Definitely work on yourself and make them regret ever leaving you.
Diego Elizarraras I’m still having dreams of him. I had a 3 min convo with him. He seems to be just fine. It made my heart shatter knowing he isn’t worried about me whatsoever even though I’m working the frontlines right now. I’m really broken
Dana Bacon just saw this reply hope you’re doing better. I can definitely say it’s got a lot better still think about her from time to time but if doesn’t hurt like it used to. Stay strong 👸
Patti Hilton hey you got this Ik for a fact that it will pass. I was engaged to my ex so I can definitely say I experienced a brutal breakup and was depressed and even suicidal at one point. But I made it and Ik you can too. Grieve and cry as much as much as you need to get all the pain out. But try and do something productive each day and stay active and social. The key here is to work on getting your happiness back and self worth up. In a few months time or even sooner you’ll look back at this and say it was a pretty good life lesson that changed you for the better. And don’t worry about finding someone. Once you complete all the steps and are at a spot in your life where you’re happy I’m positive the right person will step into your life.
I have been thinking I was in a pretty good position to have my ex reach out. It's been 2 weeks now... but then I came the the comments and it seems like it is actually pretty rare that people are successful??? Especially girls that want their ex-boyfriends back. Seems like a lot more guys get their ex-girlfriends to contact them. I'm feeling hopeless again...
I've been following your videos & thank you so much! I did the no contact.. not a full month, but it still worked. We've broken up after 17yrs! I was miserable a month ago.. not the tables are turning😊. I love him so I'm not moving on anytime soon, but I am living my life & giving him hell!
@@Hannah-vw8xd he try to only contact me about our son. He's rude at times & mean, but I know it's because he's fighting himself trying to hate me because he loves me. I don't want him back right now, but I would love it in the future. Breaking up is extremely hard. The no communication thing is tough! I try & fail so much at that lol.
I did the breakup.. I regret it the minute I walked out. 5 month later and I'm still waiting for her to apologize for our break up.. :( still working on self improvement, by the way...
I know my ex is grieving and time is needed to heal. His mind has control over his heart despite what he said. I know he hasn’t told friends about the break up and he’s still holding onto my stuff. It’s been 2 weeks and hasn’t contacted me and I haven’t contacted him either. I’m doing okay and in a much happy place and letting go.
Hello happy new year to the both of you I hope this year is going to be better for all of us, thank you for your video it was very helpful, but what about men and women that don’t grieve and move on to relationship from relationship, that is what my ex-boyfriend has done for the past four years he doesn’t let himself grieve and finds a replacement is there any videos on that, or can you make a video and help us understand how they move from relationship to relationship without any grieving thank you
I’ve been loving, caring, and supportive to my ex girlfriend. But we had a huge fight because she wanted to leave me but I didn’t want us to break up. But she did anyways. She broke my heart. But after a awhile (2 weeks) she called me. I was just, working on myself. Plus I was on a trip. But now she hasn’t reached out, and I miss her. She was my everything. I wish I could have her in my arms. But it doesn’t work like that. My heart cries, my mind thinks. What should I do?
It was hard to move on after break up and been dumped. It took me more than 1 year to grieve, feeling sad and lost. However, within more than 1 year, I also applied no contact in order for me to focus and heal myself gradually. I made it even it took more than 1 year. Right now Im keep moving forward, plan my goal and be a better version of myself without telling my ex any information about me and keep no contact.
yes grieving is a process during no contact but watching the one you love so much in another relationship and they let the other stay at the house you once shared is another emotion. Yet still I will continue too stay quite and unknown while i work on myself for ME. She does not deserve me. Stay Strong EVeryone.. there is hope and someone will come along and never let you go
@@bazsacko5105 Words are easy, my friend. I feel your fear on this due to such a scenario would be the point of NO return for ANYONE, who has any self-respect for themselves. Scary to EVEN THINK ABOUT, let alone read about in ones comment. Best of luck to you and yo us ALL!
Thank you. I hadn't really looked at it that way before, that he might be feeling all sorts of emotions like I am going through. I just thought he'd be hurting or happy, no in between emotions. I find comfort in this and I will give him grace.
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I broked up in last month and doing no contact since 10 days ...i talked to her best friend about whole situation and now she's on my side to help me in getting my ex back ...her best friend advice me
That what if we together make her jealous by making her curious and anxious that her best friend is showing interest in me....and want to be in relationship with me
Does it gonna work
Vinay Singh that will only make matters worse! I would NOT recommend doing that. Just stay no contact and work on yourself. Any tactics to try and make an ex jealous may backfire!
Again, what about work every day?
To elaborate, when you see them every day at work and need to talk.
I really like coach margret I wonder how much it cost to have a session with her
Was unaware my ex had a heart.
🤣 same!
Cold heart
Finchopolis I am still not sure, not sure if there’s a soul there either. I always knew she had an empathy issue she can turn on the charm on and off too easily. Possible Sociopath...
Lmao I agree with your comment
Finchopolis 😂😂😂🤚🏽me too🤣🤣
Yesterday I had a dinner with my ex after 2 years and 3 months after breakup. I've been in no contact from day one, he reached out several times but with no direct wish to meet/ repair things. I also made no mistakes like begging etc. as I saw breaking up as major betrayal from his side. The words he said yesterday LITERALLY repeat what Craig has always said: "Initially your silence and respecting my decision were relieving for me but with time it has become the worst punishment. I really hoped that you would call and lash out but you never did..." You can imagine how speechless I was. He wants to see me again but now it is my turn to decide if it is right for me. I am in a fantastic place internally right now as this time has brought me tremendous growth in spite of awful pain I experienced.
This is so encouraging to read.
This is very inspiring...
In your case, WHY would you jeopardize the happiness you have now by returning to the one that smashed your heart? 2 years? Move on darling...
Oh dear…. Move on already
Man move on, she can’t find another one like you in two years and that was the real reason she came back. For me if she leave me to find another one that is the point of no return.
I like what Margaret said, “if you’ve been attached to someone you can’t just detached from them unless you grieve” so if your ex have loved and cared for u at one point in their life, they can not totally move on unless they process the loss of you, and if they’re in a rebound they are just delaying the grieving process.
Will they go through the same process for the rebound too?
I dated my best friend, but I was the rebound. We loved each other very much.
My ex grieved the relationship while she was still in it. She would randomly start crying and ask me to hold her. I thought maybe she was going through some family issues...nope. She was crying because she was letting go of me while I was sitting there trying to make her feel better. She finally left me when she vastly improved her life and I became "not good enough" for her. She came over, broke up with me, went to a friends house and then to a football game the next day. It's been a month and half and I've heard nothing from her. I don't think I ever will. It almost feels like she's using my pain to motivate and improve her life even more.
@@emanuelmarcus4602 then you should also use your pain to motivate yourself and improve your own life. make it about you, not her. work on yourself and move on. life's unfair, people rarely treat us the way we deserve to be treated but there's nothing we can do. we can't control what others think or how they feel, so our only option is really to try and use all the shit that happens to us in our favour.
I know your comment is 8 months old and I really hope you're over it now, but I'm in that situation right now. my ex of 3 years got a cool job and started meeting cool people and all of a sudden realised he didn't need me anymore. I tried HARD to get him to change his mind but he wouldn't take me back, and roughly a month after we split, I heard he'd already started seeing someone else. I cried every day for 2 months straight until I decided enough was enough, cut all contact with him and started working on self improvement (in my case through studying, going to therapy, improving my art and exercising). one month in, I realised I no longer wanted to be with him. I feel no anger towards him, I just feel that I deserve better. it's not an easy process and it certainly doesn't happen overnight, but it is the ONLY way
Very true! My ex really cared for me, since we’ve been together for 5 years.
@@Polly1589 That sounds awful, I am sorry for you. But tbh I think you can grieve in advance just to a certain degree. Image you know someone close is going to die, you can prepare for that moment when they will pass, you can cry and be sad before but once they are gone it hits differently and often isn’t the way you thought it was going to be
It’s good to know that they are grieving and feeling depressed too.
Unfortunately it's more than likely for a day or two.
@@alwaysalways1392 Yes... if they are 100% avoidant, that's right xD And as you may know, it's really rare to see that grade of avoidance.
Maybe some. My ex of 3 years had a guy lined up so I doubt she grieved at all
my ex is grieving and depressed all the time because they're depressed all the time anyway lol
shav12 my ex has a new bf and she definitely grieved. If they get someone new they are just delaying the grieve. Mine writes me every few months and it’s every single time about her being sorry for breaking my hearth and that her new bf is being abusive. Last time she wrote me was this Thursday and she told me she isn’t over our relationship.
To the wrong person, you'll never have any worth. But to the right person, you'll mean everything.
U so right I had the wrong men
My recent ex meant everything to me, but unfortunately, I never had any worth for him
That's way too black and white, I don't agree at all
So powerfully true.
Anyone that can turn cold and unrecognisable - and unable to communicate like an adult, is either hiding something, or they are emotionally immature in my opinion.. I value loyalty - seems to be sadly lacking these days.
Loved this expression
Margaret is the type of grandmom I want to have. I can imagine her comforting me in my darkest moments.
I want Coach Margaret too ❤️
Same 🥰
Idk It was hard at first to go no contact but it's been 3 1/2 months and I'm not hurt about it anymore I actually feel very much ok with it. Though I do love him I focused on God and let myself heal and fully accepted change is ok. Honestly if he come back ok and if not ok. Can't control the future so left it alone, gave it to God and feel amazing 🤗
Can i kindly ask did he come back?😩
Lord bless you and wish you the best
I’m proud of you❤️
@Rick Hanson updateee???
53 days...
I have been in no contact for 1 and a half months. She reached out to me about a week ago and told me "she has been concerned about me", "she was honestly so surprised I didn't reach out to her" and that "she felt we hadn't talked through the breakup". I told her I appreciated the thoughtfulness and that she is welcome to meet with me when I am back in town, she said she'd "Love that". Thank you Coach! Regardless of how our eventual discussion turns out, I feel happy, healthy, and more secure than I ever have.
Your secure because she's back
you guys really need to do a lot more on short term relationships and breakups ... 3-4 months.. the beginnings of falling in love then having it all come to a sudden end! Hurst's more than my 18 year marriage ending..
SJ Agree... :(
amen
I rather breakup the first couple of months than years later after having a child and stuck dealing with co parenting and moving out plus splitting the baby time on the holidays so are yall sure breaking up during the first couple cut your losses and move on at least you can just move on without having a child or something legally binding to that person
So much truth in this. I was also married before but actually recently had a breakup after ~2 months which hurts so much worse and affects me so much more. Just glad I'm not alone because this doesn't make sense 😅
@@ty8255 Well that's why. You spelled separate wrong. Just kidding ! I know it hurts like hell. In the long run she did you a favor !
You guys are truly amazing. It's the both of you that are currently pulling me through the roughest break-up of my life so far. Thank you so much.
❤️💪
keep strong
Keep strong!
Look, there are nearly 8 billion people on this earth. No matter how much your ex meant to you, he or she is not the only one you can have a relationship with. If you were dumped as a man, man up and get on down the road. Either she comes back or she doesn’t but do NOT wait for her. You will miss so many cool broads while waiting for the one who didn’t value you when she had you. Plus, she may never come back and you have to understand that, but living on a prayer will only hurt you. Stay strong, happy New Year!!
Amen brother NC works with or without your ex
True, move on... if the relationship is not mutually sacrificial, then it’s toxic.
Take that 8 billion and cut that in half to separate genders so that’s 4 billion. Take that 4 billion and cut that in half,considering the already married/taken people so that’s 2 billion. Take that 2 billion and cut that in half, for those that adults are not able to marry or be in a relationship, 1 billion left. Take that 1 billion and cut that in half for those that are minors (underage) that’s 500 million left. Take half out to narrow it down that interests are different, that’s 250 million. Out of that Take half out that fall within the age group u prefer (obviously 8 billion ppl are not all over 21), that’s 125 million, so let’s take out half for those that are just not compatible and that’s 62 million 500 thousand, take that and divide into the preferences you are looking for: religion, eye color, hair color, political preferences, hobbies, nationality, education, financial level,physical stature, height, language, with kids, no kids, married before, never married, virgins, etc. and what are you left with? My point is, it dwindles down and it feels like there is not enough good, quality, connections there are out there to make. Definitely not the 8 billion number range. The ones remaining and seeking should work on themselves, get your mindset better, get your emotions more grounded. Value yourself that if one of those dwindled down 8 billion breaks your heart, it’s easier to recover and change for the better. Change to be a better person, if not for the next relationship but for oneself.
You're right but sometimes if people think that they can rekindle things then they should. If people think that this particular person has future potential they have a right to 'indirectly' pursue one more time. If things don't work out, then yes... there are so much fish in the sea!!!
And that is the beauty of NC.
@@InnKogNeeto Plus.that guy.had a lousy attitude lots.of broads out there. Thats way.she left.him he is probably nothing but.a fk boy.
Let them go, I was in a relationship for 7 years and now she’s with someone else. I’m doing no contact to better my life and move forward ❤️🙌🏼
did she ever reached out?❤
@@Swiss_Girl eventually but I’m good without her
@@Himothy_xx good for you😃 I am on day 15 of no contact…
It's like sitting down with my brother and grandmother for a chat. I love it!
Brother? 🤮 😜
It was great. It was beautiful. He understood me. I messed up. I let my insecurities control me. I allowed someone to convince me my ex was someone he wasn’t. I finally let him go. I still feel ❤him. I’m just living life without him.
Margaret is so sweet!!
She’s beyond amazing
Judy Jack-Burton I find her very likable as well.
I would so love to speak to Margaret
@@CoachCraigKenneth yes she's amazing
Hello beautiful angle how are you doing
day 5 of no contact. i almost broke it today. im so sad without him
5 days are nothing. Keep no contact Up, it will Help you.
how did it go? I am on day 14 of the breakup/no contact😞
I am on Day 1😢 i just cry n cry but wont let him know no matter how much i want to call i aint doing it. He beat me chwat n i always forgive but now i am The bad one of how i been tracking of his actions.
@@Missy-d9qI am so so sorry!!! please stay strong! it will get better I promise! go no contact!
I miss Coach Margaret! She's so sweet! God bless her soul!❤
It's getting harder and harder to not text him that I miss him. I really want him back and my whole world was just destroyed when he broke up with me. I just want to hug him. I miss our cuddles and staying up watching TV together. I hope he misses me too even though I doubt he does. I'm so scared that he is completely over me. I really want him back. I hope he changes his mind.
I think about these same things a lot. I wish i could hug him and watch tv or a movie and snuggle up like we used to. But I know he won’t feel or miss these things because he avoids these negative feelings. I’m tired of feeling hurt because of him.
Me too
I know that feeling cause I was mentally obsessed with my ex
update?❤
Im just tired of trying to date and have a relationship...all of this is too much 😔😔😔😔😔 like its easier to just be alone..
I did the handwritten letter within the first few days of the breakup... ugh...Then I found these videos. It's been a week since he broke off the engagement and I'm on day 4 of NC. It's tough man.
Update? My heart goes to you. I'm blessed mine was long distance so I didn't have the chance to do the very very bad things like stalking or handwritten letters
D30 Was distraught and experienced first panic attack today....... Have a lot of work to do on myself but I swear your videos help so much Craig! Thank you for everything you do for us.
My ex said he did the grieving in the relationship behind my back. I was so pissed at him for that
Margaret is flat out amazing!!!
Watched this video 2.5 months ago when i was 15 days into nc. Thought i didn't need to see it again. I was wrong. I feel powerful again.
update?❤
This old lady gives great advice. We always learn more from the experienced.
Old lady. That is very rude to say
It's ridiculous to assume that "the one who did the breaking up" is less hurt, because there is very likely a painful reason they HAD to end things, not by choice, but because they were being treated badly or they were cheated on, so they had no choice b/c to stay would destroy their self-respect, or their sanity.
Bullshit, i dont mean you are but the excuse is.
While there are silly people who show you their true colours.
There is more than enough afraid little boys and girls (emotional maturity) that this is not true
Most break ups don't happen for these reasons, and obviously dumpers usually don't feel as hurt. Especially right after the break up.
Unless they actually had to break up while still having feelings for their partner. Which is pretty rare
..... or they thought they had better options?
Your comment is emotionally charged and illogical.
My ex told me I would always be in his heart. We just didn't fit, very different people and yet we had a bond.
I broke no contact and she said that the past few weeks that she was "severely depressed ". I asked her why, she said because she hurt me and fear of losing me..She even sent a note and said she thinks about me often and misses me.. I made a mistake and wrote a letter after that and talked and text back and forth. She said in a text that she was afraid I'd try to rekindle and shed have to say no. I'm no contact once again....This is a relationship that started in November 2020.. It's a LDR but we were together often and made many memories quickly. My heart is broken...
Update
It’s been almost a year now, and I’m still hurting so much. I’m afraid it will never stop.
Its almost 6mos but it feels like it still the day she broke up with me. 🙁 She reach out yesterday asking about the password of my account. What to do? 😑
6 months on & you get clarity... kicked to the kerb , lost everything apart from myself & with the help of my good friends & family, I gotten through the worst & moving on xx
The critic you don’t know they’re not coming back.
@@songsforsale427 too late.. Already give it to her thru viber. Just the plain password. No other messages from me. I think its just a direct indirect message because she did not open the account. I know because that account will show when is the last log in. I miss her so badly and i still cry😭😭.
mai mai sounds like the indirect direct contact coach speaks about.
I have to disagree with stating the dumper doesn’t have a support system. In my experience, especially with this last painful breakup, he knew for a long while he’d breakup with me and had a support system ready for him. Meanwhile I was left alone, in shock, and too embarrassed to reach out to anyone. I’ve had to manage all of this on my own with the exception of all the confusing “getting your ex” back videos.
Walking away from my ex was a no brainer after getting broken up with over email after 7 years together. I value myself way too much to get treated like that. How my ex may feel doesn't compare to how much better I deserve.
Moxy ThePirate kudos to you
I was with mine for 8 years (engaged for the last 4) and I got a voicemail
DonnaNoble MD .... mine was going into 4 years and he lined the next girl up and ghosted me. No emails, no voicemail, nothing. Happened around the time I got hit by a car too... after that I think I was just pretty disgusted and turned off by his behavior. So no thoughts about wanting him back, think I deserve better than that. I’ve blocked him since. If he can’t even handle a breakup like a mature adult, I don’t think I need to expect too much from him. I saw his true colors, end of story. I hope I learn from my experience to learn to have Better judgement and to heal my attachment trauma so it doesn’t happen again.
@J J people do weird things. A lot of humans can't handle guilt, so they do whatever they can to have the easiest way out for themselves. That said, definitely grateful to have walked away with immediacy, strength beyond what I thought I'd ever have.
Mine was phone call and I thought that was bad but an email??! That’s shameful
My ex is very selfish would be surprised if he missed me or has a heart
I was taught if someone has a question about me or someone else, then let them go! I'm no "second choice." The one for me is SURE about me!
I loved this. I'm sure my ex is grieving too. Thank you for that approach!
I ended my connection with someone I love very much but I didn’t feel I was priority and I have expressed it as much as I could - I’m forcing myself to no contact. It hurts because the person is not reaching out to me to try to mend this or work it out and it’s making me feel I was right in feeling I wasn’t a priority. I can’t pursue. I have value to the right person that will fight for us. If there is no contact then the person is not the one meant to be. I just need to move onwards.
Yes, you did the right thing. I wish l did that because l felt l wasn't his priority. I hung in there and it ended badly. He found someone else & left me, but l wish l left him first
Topkat I’m so sorry for the pain of your experience :( Hurt people hurt people. Just remember it was just him that didn’t know how to love you and it is his actions thereafter prove to you he wasn’t worthy for you nor could he see the true value of all you could have offered. Stay strong... heal... and never settle for anything less than a champion for your heart.
I was the person on the other end of your story. I've tried to work it out but she's not having it. 1 month NC so far be we split in April.
I know exactly how you feel. I broke up with my partner who played me & haven't heard a peep from her. She's with her side chick now
I have been grieving for 4 years now. Not ready to see another man. Still empty and a big hole in my heart
I ran into him today at the gym, last time I saw him was almost a month ago, we talked, he seemed happy to see me, or he was just being polite, I was being cheerful.
I hope I can find a way to somehow show him that I can now see why he broke up with me (he said he wasn't happy anymore, I can see now it was because of my anxiety) and that I'm DOING THE WORK to improve myself (have bought your first 5 workbooks) and become the best version of myself.
I love him so much, and I know he loves me too, we were together for 3+ years, but I'm afraid that if I can't help him see that I'm finally changing, that it won't cross his mind to come back. And tbh, I wouldn't consider it coming back, either, if I were him... I was quite a bitch...
Hope everyone is feeling a little better each day, hang in there fellas!
Wow! I have A LOT of respect for you after reading your comment. Honest. I hope one day soon to be where you are inside with all of this. Similar situation here. Thank you for your post and my sincerest best wishes for you going forward!
@Andrew Peters In regards to your response to Cecilia k. You are so right as to the power of admitting/expressing just that. A LOT OF POWER! He'll of an observation, Andrew!
How are you doing now?
I guess cheating is in the group of abusive things
My ex is DEFINITELY not feeling any of these feelings you've mentioned. She is very good at 'switching off' and crack on without being troubled by her decision. She texted me to say I can't do this anymore, it's best if we call it a day....after 8 months dating/together. She says no longer loves me, only as a friend and it stops there. As much as I would love to believe she is going through all of the above mentioned in your video, she is perfectly fine by her decision and happy. Now that's annoying, if only I was a fly on the wall in her house to see what she's like since breaking up with me.
Daughter going through heartbreak. Watching your videos and sharing the information with her. She has gone no contact. First time she has ever handled a break up this way. Hopefully it works.😊
It will work. She may not get him back but she will go stronger and heal faster. But it’s not just about going no contact but also about taking space to learn and grow and do personal growth. You either get the ex back or find someone new. Either way it works and you win.
Stacey Smith so sweet of you
Did he come back?
You are the best mom in the world tbh.
the mom i wish i had :"(
God, these videos literally have saved me from self destructing. Thank God for both you. You are angels from Heaven. ❤️
Perfect timing. Needed to hear all that. Thank you coaches. Appreciate you both very much 💕
It gets better
Hello beautiful angle💕💕💕
Currently 11 pm where I am at and I can relate hard core. It’s been four months also and he is with someone else since we broke up . One day at a time
Hoping you are doing way better now
How are you? Did his rebound fail?
Been in no-contact now 11 months since the breakup in May 2022 and Feel the grief from him broke my heart . 💔
I'm very sorry for your loss. 🫂
My heart is broken. 9 weeks on. I don’t know when the pain will end 😥
My heart broke, my soul split 26 days ago. Give you a hug, it will end some day.
My heart is broken too. Stay busy and work on yourself. That’s all we can do.
It's impossible to say when the pain will end, but it WILL become less and subside in time. It depends on many factors. The most important thing to do is acknowledge what you feel and process it. Don't let it dominate your daily life if possible, but truly experience what you feel and look at things from both a rational and emotional perspective to see the whole picture of the relationship and what it meant to you. Your post was 2 months ago. How are you feeling now?
Hey.. it's getting better by now.
Hugs.
@@michellezheng9881 did ur ex cm bk?
She broke up with me over letter...typed even lol. Never responded after she sent it. The first couple of weeks really suck but after awhile it honestly gets 100x better.
I want my husband back. You say a lot of things that relate to me but it upsets me. I will not give up on him.
CARMEL COHEN i feel the same way as you do.
What is the situation now
My ex was very passive aggressive and gave me the silent treatment regularly if we had disagreements. So this is really no different. He never wanted to connect and that’s why we broke up in the first place. Good riddance.
6 String Therapy: Well now he is dating someone else so I don’t even think about dating him again. It’s water under the bridge and I wish him well...
This was a good one....do more on the perspective of a woman that broke up with a guy and her thinking.
I actually broke things off w my xbf. I didn't not want him in my life. I wanted him to change. We were still seeing each other 3 years later and I hoped we were getting back together. Then he met his current woman. He's been w her 3 years. I know he still misses me and I miss him too. My heart has done a full 180. I took so much for granted. Nobody else I date even compares to him. Hopefully in time your x will feel the same way about you. I wish you the best.
@@patticakesintexas have you straight up asked him if he wants to see you again? What were the things you wanted him to change on?
I'm with Margaret...I can see the visual!! One thought gets off...another terrible one gets on!! Good one coach Craig!!
I understand all this... but when they were your bestfriend and lover and is your whole world... what's one supposed to do... it's human nature! - How one gets from that to being enemies is beyond me and as far as I am concerned it's completely F'd up!
How much space does someone need... how much time is enough... seriously... by that time the dumpie would have moved on and quite possibly no longer want's them in their life... that's the big conundrum.... see F'd up!
THIS WHOLE THING IS COMPLETELY CONFUSING AND SERIOUSLY, WHAT'S THE POINT!
It's over and nothing will fix it!
Why would your ex reach out ? They left. Their choice and what's done is done. Especially when you know that's their attitude towards life. " My choice is made and there is no going back, it's final!" - What do you do when they say that and you know they mean it ??
Case closed... move on. DONE!
You.take care of yourself. Do what you.have to do to find peace in your broken heart. Most of all.keep hope in your heart. You loved once.you can love again.
It really is, Nathan. You are so right, it really is F'd up. Best wishes, brother!
@@barbarariley3488 Thank you, Barbara. Very same to you as well!
Surrender your feelings, heal day by day and accept the situation.
Margarets wisdom never gets old..I miss that sweet lady
My ex has been very friendly, flirtatious and tactile towards me. He was very complimentary and offered to buy me a drink. I went NC after he dumped me by text 5 months ago and have been focusing on myself. I’ve bumped into him twice - Nov and Christmas at social gatherings) I was cool, calm and collected. He mentioned that we should ‘catch up!’ He sent a NY text. I replied and a few messages exchanged. He said that he’s going to call me!!
What does this mean? An apology, interest, curiosity..??
I’m not sure whether he’s seeing someone else. Not sure I want him back and feeling a bit confused.
J Dee how’s it going? What is the reason for dumping you?
Play it cool. Wait until they make a commitment. If they want sex its a personal decision for you. But if you are not ok with fwb they need to tell you they want to comeback.
lol @ coach Margaret’s travel agency joke at end of video. Helpful as always.
My ex wrote me on Thursday night and she compared me a lot to her new bf. She says she thinks she is in a toxic relationship. She also told me she isn’t over our relationship and she kept comparing us telling me about all the bad things her new boyfriend does which I never would’ve done. But she also says she doesn’t want to break up with him because she loves him and she isn’t sure if she still likes me that much. She wrote me a lot of messages she instantly deleted so I could see them but her boyfriend can’t. She said it’s not very grownup hang on something from the past. Over the time of me and her writing she said we would be like soulmates.
So to summarize it: she thinks I have a lot of better trades then her bf does, but she still loves him even to he is abusive.
Be bad. A little. Minimal necessary force. Be a bad boy.
… *what???* … … *what* the *FUCK?*
my ex put a restraining order on me because I got upset. I hit the refrigerator and yelled at her. Im stupid and ashamed. But she kicked me out of the house, got a new boyfriend all in 1 week of the fight....weve been together for 3 amazing years.....this all happened so fast. I hope she talks to me one day. i will always love her. no matter what she does to try and hurt me...she also killed my cannabis plants on purpose to upset me. its so messed up.
Did she ever come back to you? How are you doing now?
If they lined up somebody else, that is when you know its TRULY OVER. You should never take them back because you should never be a second choice or a plan B. You are worth more than that.
Lord Help Me. I just broke up with my girl three days ago. This is not my first time but I’m feeling miserable.
Am struggling with no contact after two weeks. So unsettled and separation anxiety. It’s physically and emotionally painful and I’m struggling to detach and disconnect. I can’t think clearly with this brain fog. My heart hurts and he’s caused so much damage. I have to watch these videos daily and have constant contact with family and friends to feel safe. This is torture
I broke-up with a man who was the love of my life, but he did not want to spend the time with me that I needed, so I broke up with him. Shortly afterwards he had a heart attack. I always felt that the brake-up was responsible. That thought stays with me to this day.
Love, a heart attack is a long time coming... it wasnt you x
Thank you coach!!! You guys are the best 💕💕💕💕.
30 days not contact today. I’m devastated it. I can’t believe that we cared so much about each other and now he acts like he doesn’t care. I know he loves me and I love him very much. I don’t know if I ever want to go back with him, because I don’t want to get my heart broken anymore. I want to move on and be happy again with myself. I was very much happy before I met him and my life was good. Now my life is a shitshow and I can hardly get out of bed. Tomorrow I’m forcing myself to go to the Gym and start taking care of myself. I need to recover myself. I don’t want to be like the people in other comments that after 1 year, 2 years, 3 years... still hanging on their ex... NO NO NO... I’m still dreaming on us getting back together and dreaming that he will contact me but I don’t know if I can ever trust that he will not dump me again... I’m moving on...
Update?
Update?
Thanks guy's, i'm in the early process of no contact here & struggling like not sleeping much, loosing weight. But thank you for giving me faith & your video's are slowly helping me.Thanks again!!
music man 67 I feel you
For Affair and Abusive relationships, it always takes two people to tangle. Not all "victims" are the victims.
Coach, 67 people disliked your video. Perhaps they are your former girl friends 😂
i really want my ex back even though i think about her as a heartless and selfish person, i think she doesnt think about me, she doesnt care what will happen to me, she's probably just talking to other people because she said she wanted to be alone but is always online... i really want to stop... i really want to stop loving her... why cant i, why is it so easy for her to just forget me and leave me to die, why is it so easy for her and so hard for me, why do i still love her after all this pain, cutting and starving myself
10:15 😂 that made me chuckel haha, its been 8 days since the breakup, and 7 days of no contact for me. I'm doing much better having so much insight from this channel, I've started focusing on myself more and putting less focus on her. I think I've done the hardest parts of grieving so far, however next week might be difficult with my bday and valentines coming up. I hope I can glide through those days in a good way
He told me everything he was going through a week before he broke up with me. I was really understanding since he was really stressed and going through alot. I was the only person he was close to and he knew he wasnt doing all he could for me anymore. When he eventually broke up with me i told him he needed to do this to make changes in his life and to do something for himself finally. I didn’t cry alot and just kept my feelings out of it and encouraged him to do the right thing and also told him i care about him and to take care of himself. He stressed that he wants to be in my life still and text but i told him that I cant do that now. So i have only texted him once and we broke up 2 days ago, i am now leaving him alone to better himself and I know I have to work on myself too. I love him so much but i also stressed if he wants back in my life he needs to really tell me as i wont try . He said pretty much he would come back eventually but i wont hold on it. I hope he finds himself but im letting him go until the time is right thank you for your videos
I love that you share your own experiences. Makes things more real.
I wonder if you realize how helpful these videos are.
Guys one of the best contents you will get on RUclips.
He's a coworker. I'm an empath. He doesn't have to say a word. I sense everything just by his presence. Right now, he's frustrated with me not paying attention to him. He's with someone else. I will continue to work on myself while he contemplates the decision he made letting me go.
It was all working out amazing... We had some great moments together.... But one day she told me that there's a lot of peer pressure on her and she wants to live alone and told me to manage somehow.... I sorta begged her. But she didn't listen and went her way... On that day I went home and uploaded some quotes as story like (Cry only for cuts and stitches and not for bastards and bitches) ... I was very angry and uploaded these just because of my anger.... Few days later I came to know indirectly that she was really hurt with my quotes... And she had a thought in her mind that I'm taking a revenge on her...... I literally want her back and there's a slight possibility too considering the great times we had together.... Watching your videos and I'm in the no contact period from that day onwards.... I see her everyday (common workplace) and maybe she has moved on... .not sure... Pls help me out .... Should I stay in the no contact period ?? It's been like about two months ...
Okay update : I just came to know that she's in a relationship with someone ( who was her friend ) ... And her new boyfriend texted me if I'm okay with this.... I replied very calmly that I'm okay and it's her decision after all..... But when I looked at his pic I laughed like hell.... But inside I was hurts like hell...
I was the one who broke it off, but it still hurts. I love him, but he wasn't giving me what I needed--his time. He is on the road for work a lot, but we talk a lot throughout the day so I miss him. I just can't accept the breadcrumbs anymore. I need more, though it hurts now.
Aisha Naushahi I’m so sorry! I know how hard it is. My ex and I have remained in communication. Some days I’m not sure if that’s a good idea or not. He just kept trying to contact me and I gave in because I do love him still. But I’m open to meeting the one God has for me.
Aisha Naushahi I’m sure the workbooks will help tremendously! These coaches know what they’re talking about. By the time you’re finished, you may not even want him back. By the way, I’m sure he misses you too. But sometimes we need a lot more than someone can give us. You’re worth a lot and you need someone who will recognize your worth!❤️
This is me exactly! I had to do the break up, for my mental health as things she said and did made me insecure, needy and jealous to the point I tried to take my own life. I have so many mixed feelings daily. We tried to stay in contact, then I did a month no contact, I broke it, called her, said text after saying it was nice to hear my voice, good to talk. Texting wasn't good, so I had to tell her I couldn't stay in contact anymore. It's been 3 weeks now. Still feels like day 1!
@@alexislaura9487 thanks but no! Why do you people post these silly comments! It's just spam!
So many mixed signals. Also, Coach Craig was right on about direct-indirect. Remember, life waits for No one. Live yours, if your ex decides they want to be a part; it's up to you.
I needed to know my ex will be hurt as well, although I don't believe she will be my level of deep in sadness (I really dipped to the lowest pit of hell).
@@alexislaura9487 they ask 200usd and I do not want to give that money to someone I do not believe will deliver.
My ex told me she grieved us while we were still together.
Thanks Coach Margaret for bringing up third party information. This is very important!
I never dated this person (i.e. we have been best friends for a few years and together almost all of the time) and he was in love with me, but when I fell in love with him he had lost feelings for me. He said he loved me but was not in love with me anymore. I think I had gotten a bit too dependent on him and that was maybe a turn off. He is a good man. I tried no contact (not sure if it works in these situations), but he would initiate contact once in a while and is still nice to me. I acknowledged my mistakes and went away for a month. It has been four months. Is it possible to still revive those feelings in him? He is acting like "just friends". Thank you for your videos! You guys are amazing! :)
Keep no contact. Any updates? Hopefully you found someone better
Broke up with my partner a month and half ago...
I didn most the mistakes you shouldn't do, finally did some no contact, only for a short while because something happened, and I swallowed my pride and reached out. They get back with me shortly and we ended staying the night with each other. It was amazing, he agreed, and I know there's still a spark there. Unfortunately he seems to be set on not being with me still. Feel shitty for being good enough to lay with but not be with him. I told him I out my foot down on friends with benefits a long time ago. It hurts to walk away, but told him if he changes his mind, give me a holler. Until then I'm focusing what I want and need for myself. I have to accept he may never reach out too and that's terrifying, but I know Im worth more then what was going on.
I can't be the only one who isn't sub and or following the Instagram to not let your ex know what you're up to while in no contact while working on yourself and or getting them back XD
It’s so true because I was the one that broke up with him and I feel horrible. I think I’m grieving more than him. I’m in pain and want to reach out to him but I’m so strong-willed I will not.
I need to take a stand. He did reach out to me with the “hey” and a “what’s up” text. I replied hours later with a “do you miss me? I know you do” text and he replied “you are the disappearing queen”. I haven’t responded and it’s been 3 days and he hasn’t either but I know he will be contacting me first again.
I’m too strong now, he made me this way all the hurt, heartache, and heartbreak now I’m numb to it all. I still miss him, I’m still in love with him but emotionally I’m exhausted and it is not healthy for me to continue on this way and although it hurts so bad and cuts like a knife I have to make the decision to move on with my life.
Don Smith He loves to play mind games and I’m so tired of it. Over these last few months I have done a lot of soul searching and I have healed and totally over him now.
over the past few months he has been calling me but I’ve been ignoring all of his calls. It’s too funny because I just got a text from him last night out of the blue it was a Nelson Mandela quote talking about holding grudges, being bitter and angry lol.
He thinks I’m bitter and angry when really I am not...I seriously like moved on. Life is so short to be still playing these childish games and I know that there is so much better out there for me. You know what I’m saying?🙂
Got broken up with 4 days before our anniversary for something i did, i was going to do the grand gesture and handwritten note for our anniversary , thankfully watched your videos ... hes actually the one who told me to watch you.. im trying to do no contact but he reaches out to me for random things maybe one /2 times a day . Our lives were so intertwined its hard to seperate everything abruptly... as soon as i feel im making progress i hear from him again and i just have an anxiety attack.
What if they were talking to someone else before they decided to end it... do they still feel these things?
Probably not
people have hearts, its human to feel
Shana.... if the pictures are correct in your profile then you are beautiful and you do not need to wait on some guy that let you go... go find someone else which will be easy for you
Physically gut wrenching. I miss him so damn much
Dana Bacon same here I never thought that a girl would have so much power over me. It’s just a horrible feeling to go through this kinda pain. I even dream about her almost every night. Definitely work on yourself and make them regret ever leaving you.
Diego Elizarraras I’m still having dreams of him. I had a 3 min convo with him. He seems to be just fine. It made my heart shatter knowing he isn’t worried about me whatsoever even though I’m working the frontlines right now. I’m really broken
Dana Bacon just saw this reply hope you’re doing better. I can definitely say it’s got a lot better still think about her from time to time but if doesn’t hurt like it used to. Stay strong 👸
Patti Hilton hey you got this Ik for a fact that it will pass. I was engaged to my ex so I can definitely say I experienced a brutal breakup and was depressed and even suicidal at one point. But I made it and Ik you can too. Grieve and cry as much as much as you need to get all the pain out. But try and do something productive each day and stay active and social. The key here is to work on getting your happiness back and self worth up. In a few months time or even sooner you’ll look back at this and say it was a pretty good life lesson that changed you for the better. And don’t worry about finding someone. Once you complete all the steps and are at a spot in your life where you’re happy I’m positive the right person will step into your life.
@@diegoelizarraras5909 THANK YOU!!!! I'm really trying. I appreciate your kind and encouraging words 🙏❣️.
I have been thinking I was in a pretty good position to have my ex reach out. It's been 2 weeks now... but then I came the the comments and it seems like it is actually pretty rare that people are successful??? Especially girls that want their ex-boyfriends back. Seems like a lot more guys get their ex-girlfriends to contact them. I'm feeling hopeless again...
How are things today?
I've been following your videos & thank you so much! I did the no contact.. not a full month, but it still worked. We've broken up after 17yrs! I was miserable a month ago.. not the tables are turning😊. I love him so I'm not moving on anytime soon, but I am living my life & giving him hell!
Wow, how are things now? Glad the tables turned 💅🏼
@@Hannah-vw8xd he try to only contact me about our son. He's rude at times & mean, but I know it's because he's fighting himself trying to hate me because he loves me. I don't want him back right now, but I would love it in the future. Breaking up is extremely hard. The no communication thing is tough! I try & fail so much at that lol.
My ex wants me to talk and stay as friends.9 months affair .the worst part is after 10 months of breakup I still suffer.why is that? 4 months full NC
Excellent, thank you. Margaret, what a precious lady, surely missed…
I did the breakup.. I regret it the minute I walked out. 5 month later and I'm still waiting for her to apologize for our break up.. :( still working on self improvement, by the way...
If you broke up with her you should reach out
@@ZeCostas yep lol
I miss my ex and he told me that wants me happy and to move on that it was not the right moment. I just miss him a lot
I know my ex is grieving and time is needed to heal. His mind has control over his heart despite what he said. I know he hasn’t told friends about the break up and he’s still holding onto my stuff. It’s been 2 weeks and hasn’t contacted me and I haven’t contacted him either.
I’m doing okay and in a much happy place and letting go.
Wise Hero did he reach out?
Hello happy new year to the both of you I hope this year is going to be better for all of us, thank you for your video it was very helpful, but what about men and women that don’t grieve and move on to relationship from relationship, that is what my ex-boyfriend has done for the past four years he doesn’t let himself grieve and finds a replacement is there any videos on that, or can you make a video and help us understand how they move from relationship to relationship without any grieving thank you
Mine did that also. He had new girlfriend lined up before he broke up with me & yes I believe he is a narcissist. It really hurts
I’m grateful for this insight. Have been trying to get the perspective of the person who left me. I thank you.
I’ve been loving, caring, and supportive to my ex girlfriend. But we had a huge fight because she wanted to leave me but I didn’t want us to break up. But she did anyways. She broke my heart. But after a awhile (2 weeks) she called me. I was just, working on myself. Plus I was on a trip. But now she hasn’t reached out, and I miss her. She was my everything. I wish I could have her in my arms. But it doesn’t work like that. My heart cries, my mind thinks. What should I do?
My ex made me heartless
Same
It was hard to move on after break up and been dumped. It took me more than 1 year to grieve, feeling sad and lost. However, within more than 1 year, I also applied no contact in order for me to focus and heal myself gradually. I made it even it took more than 1 year. Right now Im keep moving forward, plan my goal and be a better version of myself without telling my ex any information about me and keep no contact.
updates?
@@eathanp2044 I'm getting better in my life.
yes grieving is a process during no contact but watching the one you love so much in another relationship and they let the other stay at the house you once shared is another emotion. Yet still I will continue too stay quite and unknown while i work on myself for ME. She does not deserve me. Stay Strong EVeryone.. there is hope and someone will come along and never let you go
Ray Perez dreading the day this happens
@@bazsacko5105 Words are easy, my friend. I feel your fear on this due to such a scenario would be the point of NO return for ANYONE, who has any self-respect for themselves. Scary to EVEN THINK ABOUT, let alone read about in ones comment. Best of luck to you and yo us ALL!
Thank you. I hadn't really looked at it that way before, that he might be feeling all sorts of emotions like I am going through. I just thought he'd be hurting or happy, no in between emotions. I find comfort in this and I will give him grace.