Workplace Bullying Is the Cult of Personality: Emotional Labor & Subordinates’ Intuition Claire Hunt
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- Опубликовано: 25 мар 2024
- A community-organizing forum where targets of workplace bullying can share experiences in a support group so you can know
1. You’re not crazy. Workplace bullying is real, and your feelings are valid.
2. You’re not alone. Unfortunately, others have experienced the same thing.
If my words resonate with you, please subscribe, turn on notifications, like and share my videos, and comment.
Read my 117-page essay in five parts on workplace bullying on my website.
• Workplace Bullying Part I: www.clairehuntonline.com/p/wo...
• Workplace Bullying Part II: www.clairehuntonline.com/p/wo...
• Workplace Bullying Part III: www.clairehuntonline.com/p/wo...
• Workplace Bullying Part IV: www.clairehuntonline.com/p/wo...
• Workplace Bullying Part V: www.clairehuntonline.com/p/wo...
#workplacebullying #narcissism #narcissisticpersonalitydisorder #NPD #narcissisticabuse #clairehunt #clairehuntonline
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"I'm making myself small in order to accommodate your ego."
"I've learned how to source my needs internally."
These sentences hit me.
I need memorize every world Claire is saying because I know is true and Claire is my idol and role model ❤
Thank you for talking about the things no one will talk about. Thank you for expressing the anger I've been feeling lately. I'm generally a pretty empathetic person but lately I've been feeling so angry from working with the public and dealing with coworkers as you described so well. Omg. I needed this today. I've been afraid one day I'd lose it and go off on the abusive customers and stupid coworkers. I feel like I'm Colombo and everyone thinks I'm too stupid to know where the rat stench is coming from.
It's too much. Emotional labor is INAUTHENTIC, and it's exhausting to maintain a false facade all day. Like I said in the video, studies show that emotional labor adversely affects your health. We have to do everything in our power not to internalize it. Because that's what abusive people want: they want us to take on their toxicity and process it for them. I for one refuse. I love the Colombo reference. If people really think you're stupid, use that to your advantage. I love being underestimated.
@@clairehuntonline omg thank you!! Yes being underestimated is definitely something to use to my advantage. Thanks for pointing that out. I just saw this.
The bunny ears are a major synchronicity for me! LOL
I don't care what political views you have. You speak to my soul and represent what I've been through. That's it. Simple. ❤
Excellent commentary Claire. It’s very exhausting to be the emotional dumping ground for narcs and others who can’t regulate their emotions. I had an ex coworker who got mad at me because I didn’t console her when her mom was sick. This was the same woman who bullied me and turned our coworkers against me. I was like IDGAF. It was cold but I didn’t care. I always noticed that little smirk they had when they dumped on me.
Or the ones who have stressful home lives and dump it on you because they feel you have a “perfect life”. It’s giving jealousy.
💯 they hate that they are married yet want all the benefits of marriage.
They dump on you because you are more emotionally expansive than they are. A lot of these people are pretty much two-note wonders: it's just rage and pathological jealousy. People who are unconscious, unevolved, and low-vibrational have no emotional depth or range. I know you are a water sign, so you probably look like an emotional "expert" to sick people. I spoke in another video about how bullying is a maladaptive and dysfunctional attempt to get unconditional love - just like children do. They act out, and, then, they come back for absolution and forgiveness, so they know that they are unconditionally loved. That's why that woman expected you to extend empathy to her after she bullied you. You're not "cold." You have boundaries. You owe bullies nothing. I ain't nobody mama, and I'm not Jesus Christ. If people want forgiveness and unconditional love, they can read the Bible or go to church or something, but they don't come to me about it.
I can relate. I have a narc sister in law that has bullied me for years and suddenly I was evil when I didn’t wish her happy Mother’s Day. These people are so far gone.
@@clairehuntonline This comment is so helpful. You literally just described the dynamics behind a situation I'm dealing with now. Thank you!
@@clairehuntonline "Two note wonders" lol! I love how you come up with these phrases!
You’re always dropping gems 💎 rebuking these toxic coworkers 🗣
I hope for all of you that you will find a good workplace without a bully breathing at you. They do exist. I used to think that there was no such thing as a reasonable workplace. But there is.
You’re one of the last few people still keeping it real 🪴🌞.
your insights have helped so much from internalizing the horrific bullying, harassment and sabotage I have experienced in toxic workplaces. it is too much to deal with, I have had to living very below my means because I am scared to re-enter the workplace as it is.
Same. The financial toll of workplace bullying is catastrophic. There's also a lot of shame around that because our culture overprioritizes money. But at least I never sacrificed my integrity, and I still have my inner peace. No one who ever bullied me can say the same.
You probably can’t get to all the comments but really appreciate your candor, Claire. You have identified intentional games people are playing. We like to deny any of this stuff is intentional and make excuses for them which encourages the bad behavior.
I worked in hospitality and property management and I was stunned at the two-facedness in both given service industries. The more I tried to appease the "customer" and care about their concerns, the more I was hated by management. Looking back on those experiences, I think they expected me to pour my emotional labor onto them. The bottom line, they were jealous. Working with the public is stressful enough, I shouldn't, or customer service employees shouldn't have to treat their bosses and co-workers in the same manner as treating the customer. After all, isn't the goal to make repeat customers? But that is not what happens in these toxic workplace environments, which are gaslighting good employees that their emotional labor is neither appreciated nor should they expect to be compensated for it because it shows their lack of competence. Corporate America has lost the plot IMO
They hated your rapport with the clients because it didn't include them. Narcissists have to be at the center of everything because they need their supply. A lot of workplace bullying is basically one big popularity contest because workplace bullies never graduated from high school. If you are well liked, you will be targeted.
You're on the spot with those observations. I'm tired of performing emotional labor.
Claire, how can you be so on point ? How woke are you ? Knowledge is a painful road, but we get so enlightened by staying in the right lane!
Exactly 🎉
'get me another beer b****!' 🤣🤣your one liners in this one had me cracking up!
This is the best video I've watch my entire life. This lady should be a president of the US for she understands the unjustice of society industrialized catastrophy.
Claire, I'm starting to see that you only have 2k subscribers because you're the only one that isn't coddling these people and telling it how it really is. Everyone else keeps preaching compassion over strength, but I guess that's what empaths want to hear because in some twisted way, even though we despise these people, they remind us of our sanity.
I have 2,000+ subscribers because my videos are too long and intellectual. We are living in an incredibly superficial era of "swipe left" and instant gratification - where everyone wants easy answers and simple solutions and no one likes to think. Also, I believe the amateur witch I worked with at the tutoring center five years ago attempted spellwork against my channel. It will only backfire on her bigtime. I don't let anyone come between me and my success.
@@clairehuntonline I noticed that the people who go hard at the NPD aren't very popular as opposed to the people who have compassion for the NPD and want to coddle him/her seem to be very popular. I would hypothesize that's so because NPD's are flooding these channels to see how people feel about them. I'm sure in their twisted minds, it gives them pleasure to see how many people they've harmed.
Claire should easily have 20K subscribers. I agree with her comment that people want easy and simple. They want the 3 simple steps you have to take in order to become a multi-millionaire and have financial freedom for the rest of your life so you never have to work again. Except, in reality, that's oversimplified and it doesn't exist. She breaks down workplace dynamics and tells the truth as it is and (many) people prefer the easy, delusional route. They want to relax, not think about what they really need to do to succeed.
Wow I love the info you’re providing. I’ve been learning about narcissism for almost 2 years now, but you explain things so well. Thank you!!
Yes bullying for 30 years, so relatable... healing this trauma is hard
The unsaid expectations listed starting at @24:35 are spot on, imo. I've come to realize that a key indicator of narcissistic personality is that the person will become offended not simply by what is actually said or done to them, but equally by what is *not* said or done. You didn't play your role in the interaction in the way they wanted, did not provide the validation they expected, so you are now relegated to the "bad" list. You may be left spinning your wheels trying to figure out what you did to offend them, but it's probably not something you actually did, but rather something you didn't do. Emotionally healthy people might feel disappointed that you didn't reciprocate an interest in them or didn't pick up on the fact that they were feeling insecure and fishing for compliments, but they don''t make you an enemy or punish you because of it.
Exactly. I've stated before that workplace bullies really, really, really believe that you hurt them first. And it's usually because you didn't give them what they wanted - which they NEVER articulate directly and which is not in your job description to begin with. It's all so pathetic and immature and such a waste of our time and energy. As I said in this video, we all get disappointed from time to time, but we don't take it personally. And bullies call us "too sensitive."
Wow that's so insightful and such a powerful statement and the way you sum up what seems to be an endless cycle of resigning or being terminated for choosing to protect my energy and walking into the work place, my place of EMPLOYMENT! And actually DO MY JOB !! instead of participating in the workplace ANTICS ! and the way they try everything to make you feel as though you are such a monster, for not allowing them to SUCK YOU DRY !! excuse I digress lol 😂😂I just wanted to say thank! you
Claire Hunt, you're the best.
another banger
It’s terrifying how similar our experiences are
I don't feel so alone anymore, thank you for putting my thoughts into words.
Yet again, truth has spoken! I appreciate your skillful ability to speak about the crux of surface level issues in the workplace and US culture, refreshing 😊🌟💫✨️
Have you looked at how being pretty negatively impacts you at work sometimes.
Thank you fir pointing out the mammy and WOC 🥰
i love the easter-egg 🐇
Claire These bullys are saying I smell one went on Fmla to try to get rid of me also says i make her head ans stomach hurt .These folks are miserable. Im waiting for this person to comeback from fmla and see what will happen. When you upload every time you explain these people you are on point.
You should watch my video on "nose-holding." I still get it everywhere I go. They are afraid of you. What is FMLA?
@@clairehuntonline sorry for the late response family medical act leave.
I apologize for not heeding your warning about those who work in HR watching these videos, but please know that even though I work in HR, I also have very real concerns with HR as a whole but that's beside the point. I am 24 and I am an administrator, and I am also on the autism spectrum so I've always had social woes, but having this kind of problem in on office environment has been a wild ride, especially since I got out of the Navy and into the "real world". I've noticed these patterns, especially in the department I work in and this concept of emotional labor has been weighing on my mind for some time now. I think to myself often about how my personality correlates with my workflow, but the way you describe this concept is showing me that I may be more privy to the absurdity of others, even moreso than coworkers who are 35+ years old.
Fair enough. I do have a video entitled, "HUMAN RESOURCES IS EVIL" that you might not want to watch! HR has really burned a lot of people, and they are pretty much universally hated on this channel. Companies need to either fold HR into the legal department or completely restructure HR so that it is forced to serve the interest of individual employees, not management. There are so many people on the spectrum who watch my videos that I am beginning to think that there is a strong correlation between neurodivergence and being targeted. I work in public schools, and, the two times I have witnessed bullying inside the classroom, both targets were non-neurotypical. Might do a video on that. Thank you for your military service.
I swear I’m going to stop spamming your channel but you just keep speaking to me. I have in past years been so guilty of perpetuating “women have small brains” type viewpoints so that I had an excuse to remain docile, small, and to continue hiding. The more I heal and see possibilities for myself the more sickened I am by even thinking those things. I don’t even know if I really believed them. They were convenient so I could stay in bed and not have to make decisions for my life or have to do things. I suspect other women do this too. Now my goal is to be a financially independent business owner and I’m soooo close. Oh, how things change.
No problem. Thank you for watching and commenting. That's internalized misogyny. Every member of every protected class in the world has internalized prejudice about his/her own class until we unlearn it. At this point the worst misogynists in the world are other women. I was raised by an abusive mother so struggled with a ton of my own misogyny for years. Try to practice self-compassion. Things serve their purpose in your life until they don't anymore. Yes, playing "possum" so as not to assume any responsibility is a common coping mechanism. You should watch my tradwife video. Congratulations on your business.
I totally get what you are saying about emotional labor in most workplaces. It's draining for me. I felt less exhausted after 8 hours working in a factory or as a janitor than I did working the same 8 hours in a restaurant or retail store. Ironically, the factory and janitor work was better paying. Recently discovered your channel. I like your work. I'm now a subscriber.
The exhaustion is because parasitic vampires are draining your life force, and I have a video on that entitled, "Workplace Bullies Are Energy Vampires." Soul-sucking predators. That's why I keep saying all of this is spiritual and energetic, and most targets are sensitives. If you are sensitive and have to be around this stuff, you have to learn how to protect your energy like your life depends on it. I'll be doing another video about that later this year.
Amen, sister.
Thanks!
Thank you!!
THIS IS THE BEST AND MOST HELPHFUL VIDEO I'VE EVER WATCH❤❤❤❤❤ CLAIRE IS A GENIUS❤❤❤❤❤
I love how you are a 'godless liberal' and you can still criticize new age toxic positivity.
You are awesome! You are always on point and have workplace bullying down to a science ❤
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 Amennn.
Love it!
45:26 that russian reference made me laugh
Speaking the truth!!
Excellent
THIS IS VERY VERY GOOD. XO MANY THX ANGELA FROM MT.
Thank you ❤
Thx Claire 💯💝💝💝
Resonates.....❤
This is such a great channel! You are speaking facts!
Thanks for sharing… take care
ALL FACTS!!!!!! Absolute Truth 💯 💡💡💡-Xclusyph Icon
I watch you everyday at work and my question is are ur jokes scripted or all off the top.u crak some pretty good ones.
I WOULD VOTE FOR CLAIRE AS PRESIDENT OF UNITED STATES ❤ LOVE HER INTELLIGENCE ❤
Are you non neurotypical?