I think the issue that woman have with 50/50 is that woman are working just as much as the man & contributing financially but then coming home and doing 100% of the housework and child care. This is coming from a married mother who works full time. A lot of men use providing as an excuse not to help around the house.
Correct if I’m a housewife I can only do that full time without working if I work to I’m not being only one cookin n cleaning n helping the kids but the father should be able to help with kids homework baths from time to time for bonding it’s his kids too
Respectfully, this is often NOT the case. I live in a middle to upper middle class neighborhood. Most of the families could survive with a single income but most have dual incomes. Most of the men do yard work as well as home maintenance. Most of these families actually have maid services that clean up the house. Ultimately, what I'm saying is that you'll find plenty of millennial men that contribute sufficiently to the household duties.
@@RemIsNice you might want to come out of Pleasantville cuz majority of women out here are having the same complaints. Im sure these women wish they can afford maid service to help them out cuz the men ain't doing it.
Thank you for sharing this perspective on marriage. I never knew this. I had an unrealistic expectation on what it takes to make a marriage works. I never knew I had to go 50/50. I totally get it. Your videos are needed. Thank you
All household duties should be 50/50 regardless, but me personally I don't like 50/50 financially especially if he makes more money than I do then he should be covering rent and bills. Doesn’t take 2 incomes to cover one set of bills. My income should take care of something else such as paying off debts, saving for different categories such as shopping, date nights, vacations, new home, new car, emergency fund, etc. That's just how I feel about it.
Idc about the 50/50 cus if I had a team mate. It would be easier because I wouldn’t have to pay the bills on my own. I would like a partner that we could both live comfortable. I want Character,reliability, respect, love
Go watch universe guru she is very well versed on relationships and how to get your man to see you as a priority by invoking his emotional response like their family members do. They only do that for them because they known him longer but if you take that space they have to fall in line behind you. You can’t be threatened you have to come across as if you care bout them too but you make him see your needs as more important.
I agree with the sentiment that a husband and wife should be partners, in every sense of the word. The problem starts to rear it's ugly head when the man works, and the woman works... But the man also expects the woman who works to work, cook, clean, help the kids with homework, give them baths, put them to bed and then take care of her wifely duties. Then it becomes a demand on us instead of a partnership. Then, the man works so hard ( physically) that he is tired, and wants to be pleased but puts no energy into pleasing his wife after SHE worked, helped the kids with homework, cooked, gave them baths, ect. Not to mention we have to dedicate time for God, praying, rebuking, meditating... It becomes 75/25 or 80/20. It never actually gets to 50/50 or 100/100... We just want acknowledgement that our role and duties matter. We want our efforts in lovemaking to be reciprocal. We just want our man to invest as much emotionally as we do. So we can be on the same page in our journey and purpose.
Right this video ignores this so bad. So many women, especially black women, over decades have complained about it not truly being 50/50 for real. That’s really when infidelity happens, the wife is worn down so bad that she neglects her looks and doesn’t want to be touched so the husband goes out to cheat. And a lot of the time, we don’t know what we’re getting into until we’re in the marriage already and having to deal with it.
Did you hear what he said, he said if it’s 50/50 then the man should share the Household duties. Don’t get a man that’s wants you to pay 50/50 and wants you to do all the housework, that’s not the man for you.
@@MersayW we don’t know what a man will do after getting married. Just cuz he says he’ll help with housework doesn’t mean he actually will or sometimes they’ll act like they’re incompetent just so they won’t be asked to help anymore. That’s a real thing.
I felt like Tony acknowledged your concerns but he was speaking to women who think they don’t have to work or contribute to the household because they are women due to this idea of a 100% provider man. It’s arrogant to assume someone wants to just care for you completely as an adult. All humans are flawed and if you have someone who helps you in anyway you should be thankful. Don’t settle for scraps but also don’t piss on good efforts.
more single woman are buying houses than single men lmfao and i know tons of woman that have 10k in savings including more than that' and that's my mother! hahaha like what😂better off single than with a dust bucket.
I think reasonable women should contribute. It doesn’t necessarily mean equally. But women should contribute tbh. I always think of my brothers in situations like this and I wouldn’t want them drowning in bills while their wife feels she shouldn’t have to contribute anything.
50/50 isn't a problem if the man is also doing 50% of the domestic work and is taking care of the kids 50% of the time. The problem is that rarely happens. Women almost always end up sacrificing more in marriage and relationships. One of reasons I would never have kids with a man unless I was wealthy enough to hire a nanny and a part time maid so I can still pursue my purpose and career goals. Otherwise it isn't worth it for women who don't want to be a SAHM.
Right don’t leave the domestic work out more likely man without character morals is going to get home same time kick off shoes n want u to handle the kids by urself just because ur the mom I dnt mind help payn bills n working a lot women are working now more then men
😂😂😂😂😂🤣 someone asked me what am I bringing to the table but just because he asked me that question it was a no go. I do have something to bring to the table but if you have to ask me that question you’re not for me..
This is one of the few things that I disagree with Tony on. You’re supposed to live BELOW YOUR MEANS, unless you’re living in poverty. If you’re living in poverty, you shouldn’t be seeking a wife to join you until you have basic STABILITY. Regardless to the economy, a wife can’t fully respect a husband who won’t fully provide. I’ve lived this life, and it took sacrifice to live within my husband’s means. He was a security guard, but he INSISTED on being the sole provider, because he was taught this by a man who also lived this. I had my own money, and he refused to spend a dime of it on our household bills. I’m proud of him for that, and I’m proud of myself for being willing to sacrifice material luxuries, and keeping up with the Jones’s for a higher principle. Tony, I’ve heard you say that you don’t believe in living below your means. You want to live AT your means, and that’s fine for your family, but not a good financial or economic principle. Not living below your means means that the average person will always be strained and stressed out trying to keep above water. The man ALWAYS sacrifices some respect when he needs a woman to pay for basic NEEDS. The man also sacrifices some respect whenever he’s willing to work his wife just so that he can enjoy more luxuries. The women and children pay a price too. It’s definitely doable for those who live by a principle. Any man who can abstain from sex based on a principle, can definitely PAY ALL BILLS in any economy. Our forefathers did this, and took pride in it. Our modern men need to strengthen their will and resolve to be men, and us women must let them and REQUIRE them to be men. Yes, the wives must fulfill their domestic duties as well. If you are 50/50, then I agree that chores should be 50/50. But if we’re being honest, we must admit that masculinity isn’t wired that way.
@MH-wj5ui everyone's MEANS isn't to live nicely.... what one person's life look like doesn't mean that's what everyone else's life should look like ESPECIALLY if they're not putting in the same amount of effort and performing at high levels
@@taxcitybagtalk Your response is contradictory. Again, educating oneself on what it takes to live nicely and respectably is at an all time high due to inflation. People need to have realistic expectations of availability of partners that can provide on one income per family. A review of the middle class income and the cost of housing alone does not make this feasible to the majority.
Not here. That's foolish. He will pay 100% of the bills AND still do whatever he needs to do around the house. I will never be that desperate for a man to where his only contribution would be to pay the bills. I can do that myself easily.
I have a friend that left her guy because of 50/50. He makes 6 times the salary she make. This is unfair. She would literally be struggling while he is just fine. When incomes aren’t the same, it should be based off percentages.
Totally agree with you! 👏 I read about a male doctor who expected his girlfriend who was doing her residency, to pay him 50/50 rent towards his condo. So, she was earning way less, but contributing toward his condo without ownership in it and they could break up at anytime... 🤦🙄
A husband that makes more than his wife should pay the bulk of the bill. (Mortgage) If you want a 50/50 partnership get a roommate. A good man provides for his family. A good woman manages the household makes a house a home. 💯
@@J_Elle30 I agree with Tony’s video. This situation doesn’t apply to the general audience he was targeting. I don’t think he would say to 50/50 in this situation. I brought this up because there are men like this that want to go 50/50 when it’s clearly unfair.
Agree but Tony referring to marraige n b honest some guys cheat when they payin fifty fifty cus they not all way in love cause if so wouldn’t want to be fifty he would want to provide more than half atleast 80 percent because in reality she’s cookn cleaning for him handing other needs
This! 🙌 my parents are both accountants and they taught me to live off of 30K that I made waitressing all throughout college while being happy, fast forward 6 years later, I still live that way making way more with 2 degrees, child free and patiently waiting for my boyfriend to propose so we can move on to the next phase of life together, learning to live on 30K saved me in this economy.
Agree. Tony should take some financial management and accounting classes sounds like. If they almost lost their home and keep having to sell purses, it may be time to reconsider getting them or downsizing.
Tony i have listened to you for a while. This may be the only post that i do not agree with you. Some people are very happy with life not making A million dollars and having 5 cars in the garage. There is nothing wrong with having one car. As if that woman was less of a lady because she had one car. But she also didnt pay any bills in her home. Thats being financially savvy. Many of us are wise earners and financially smart. You seem to be profiling your assets in this post and expensive material items are only worldly possessions. Im a 6 figure single woman and I live very comfortable. You dont need to prove anything to anyone but your wife. Im not sure how bragging on your lifestyle is helpful here . . .😊
For years, decades women (especially black women) have been paying and still expected to pay 50/50 of the finances. Which has often turned into the woman paying 80 percent, then 100 percent if the man looses his job or stops being consistently employed. Wanting to and having to pay 50/50 of finances are two different things. A woman shouldn't have to go 59/50 on finances if she doesn't want to. Especially taking care of children and the house most of the time.🙏🙏🙏
This is probably by far the only video of yours I 100% disagree with. This isn’t even on brand for you. Nothing you talk about even faintly ties to going 50/50 with a man. You weren’t a “bum” when your wife met you. Nor looking for a woman to take care of you. You had vision and was already independent. Statistics reveal more women are financially contributing at least 50% or more to their households. Singles moms contribute 100%. If a woman can do it alone, why can’t a man? The way women are down bad right now and being financially taking advantage by men from ALL walks of life, this is a very very dangerous narrative to push. You see it yourself everyday. 50/50 is the new “have my cake and eat it too” for A LOT of men. There may men that are genuinely in these positions and will provide in their success season, but that is among the FEW. I saw the wedding post you’re referring to in your video and I could tell it was a false story. A new narrative to push by toxic and red-pill men to distract us from the news of passport bros being murdered overseas. We have to do better and not fall for clickbait. Ladies, protect yourselves and your wombs. 50/50 may sound logical, until you are burdened with children, a husband, and still your portion of 50. Bless.
God created men to provide so he should provide. If a woman wants to help him that should be her choice and not obligatory. Of course any good woman will help her man if he is struggling but that man must be her husband not her boyfriend.
Agree. Plus Tony was talking about the early days of their marriage when they were early 20s. He himself said by the time he was 28 things were different.
Genesis 2 18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a HELPER who is just right for him.” 24 This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
No disrespect intended Tony but I must disagree on this one. Yes, your good lady wife took over financially when the times called for it but most women will if children are part of the picture. If no kids were born yet would your wife have done the same? I don't think a woman should ever go 50/50 financially with any man. It benefits the man and wears a woman out. I don't care if it's just a one person tent a couple has to sleep in, you can be guaranteed it will be "her" job to clean it lol. Studies show time and time again that women do the vast majority of domestic/ childcare even when bills are split evenly. As I said, nothing but respect for you and your wife but your take on this is wrong.
Yea I couldn’t agree with this one. I’m single and I refuse to have a man lead me and be the head but I’m paying half the bills and then do all the housework when I come home too while he kicks his feet up. I’m all for partnership and am willing to work part time but I’m not entering a marriage where I have to work just as hard as my husband to make life work. I can do that alone just like I’m doing now. I understand that hard times hit which is why I’m willing to work part time so that I wouldn’t have gaps in my resume to where I’d be un-hirable
@@deasyastarr well said. Another thing Tony didn't really think about on this one is he's part of a tiny fraction of 1% of men who make 250k plus. 99.99% of men out there will never make enough to be a sole provider so a woman would be 50/50 for decades the vast majority of the time 🤷♀️
@@angelicaangel2624 maybe it’s because I don’t have dreams of having this crazy luxurious lifestyle that I’m looking to have a 80/20 marriage when it comes to finances. I’m fine with living in a two bedroom house or apartment, having decent cars, and pretty much doing the same things for my self care that I’m able to maintain now. I don’t want designer clothes and bags and I’m fine with at least one nice vacation a year. I don’t think it takes a millionaire for two people to live comfortably and I don’t want children so that’s less money to spend. I guess so many women want this over the top lifestyle so maybe he’s talking to them and not me lol
@@deasyastarrlet’s be real, Your being reasonable and compromising as a 31 year old man, the obsession with lifestyle today is astronomical. I see a ton of women here bucking the message cause it finally doesn’t agree with their narrative. 75k is the median household income in the US. I make over six figures but I also help my mom (I pay the mortgage she does the smaller bills) why? Cause she works in daycare and sacrificed for me to come to America. I pretty much have given up on dating. Because since my salary Is all that matters it will always be cut short and I see it as a duty to help my mom.
@@Pandering_equalsmoney I mean I can’t knock what other women want, they’ll just need to find a man who can provide the lifestyle they’re trying to live and men need to find women that they are able to provide for or live within their means with. Sadly social media has created this heard mentality where a lot of people aren’t inclined to just be themselves and choose the life path that’s most true to them because I’m sure many people would not want to have the exact same lifestyle as everybody else if they weren’t worried about competing and worried about what someone else has to say about their lifestyle. A lot of people end up unhappy that way.
Um we still in the time but they not providing still being treated like property cheated on beat on and they have several family too. All that and they have the audacity to have their hand out. Its never 50/50 women have a heavy load. I see it worldwide. Get your money ladies. Leave these dusties
Many of us can take care of ourselves without a man. If the man cannot do anything for you besides intimacy and paying half the bills you are NOT gaining anything. The only thing that changes is you can afford a bigger space to live by having two incomes. You can have that with a roommate! Plus doing this 50/50 thing you end up with more meals to cook, more laundry, and more cleaning. Men aren’t as tidy as women on average, plus helping all the kids since we are better at it. I recommend all men and women look at the couples of men and women in their 60s/70s where the women worked full time. Almost every single time the woman looks way way way older than the man. That’s not fair to the woman! Women end up looking a mess when they have all that added stress!!! My husband pays the major household bills and I am willing to live within his means. When I was working at the start of the marriage (even from homr) I wasn’t able to be the best wife I could be and focus on my husband when I wanted to. As soon as I stopped working I got pregnant that same month!! And remember! For the man to even take you as a wife back in the day the man had to prove he could care for you and provide for you!
I broke it off with a man who wanted me to go 50/50. If he can't afford a woman, then he doesn't deserve one. I told him I wasn't cooking, cleaning, and paying bills. He wasn't going to get a sandwich out of me. He also thought he was going to be the head. Not in this lifetime or the next. Women have 100% control of what they allow.
Women have been taught that a man’s love goes where his money goes. If he doesn’t want to share his money with her, she doesn’t feel that he really loves her. 50/50 for some men is not because they can’t afford it. For some it’s , I’m not sharing my money with you!
Tony I’m definitely a supporter of your work and have been rocking with you for years. But this fear and scarcity mindset you are pushing on ladies regarding men providing is wild. Telling them that they have to go back to accepting another family and no voting rights to get that is crazy. Yes I agree that they need to be partners, and it can’t be all about what they are receiving…..but how about just living within the means a man can provide and the woman taking care of him? That is a thing. A man doesn’t need to make millions to provide
I love your channel Tony been a follow for years but I will have to disagree.If I have to go 50/50 with a man financially he is just a roommate and shouldn't ask me to sleep with him then if he don't want to have to take care of kids too because what if I get pregnant I will have to stay home anyway on maternally leave.I say a man should at least be able to rent a house in a decent neighborhood it doesn't have to be expensive.
I think Tony is absolutely right about a woman supporting her man (husband) in times of need, but i think he missed addressing the issue of so many men these days lacking ambition and direction..
Im thankful for my husband. We started off as 50/50 in the beginning of our marriage, I had no problem with that because he always treated me like a Queen and helped around the house. Fast forward to now we are 80/20. He pays all the major bills, insurance, and for dates. I just do the grocery shopping & pay for miscellaneous things ❤
Scripture says a man should be providing for his family, I think it’s different a woman working having an incoming and supporting when needed but it is the man’s role to provide for his family, no woman can give 100% to her family AND BE working and paying bills speaking as a mother
Also, many American parents are not paying for weddings, and that’s okay. It would better serve a couple to opt for a cost friendly wedding.☺️ I like the idea of a small wedding honeymoon combo.💍🏝️ Inform family & friends about y’all’s decision and keep it moving.💓
i feel like in today’s culture, they automatically resort to the financial aspect regarding 50/50 when within a relationship, 50/50 is NOT just about finances. like you said, it’s the teamwork
Is Mrs Gaskins really having that nice life ...I wonder or it's all a talk, big, fat talk of Mr Tony, while she does all the actual work while he is laying on his sofa, busy being an "influencer" and still wanting her to do full 50/50?
This is so spot on. Some women THINK they want a marriage where the man pays 100% but like you said you’re not just doing nothing. I’ll add if he’s trying REALLY trying, DONT LISTEN TO FAMILY regarding your partner. Stay the course.
This video just confirmed a whole lot for me. My instincts where right. My goodness. Wow. And in most culture the man pay for everything gladly. In my culture, it shows he can take care of his wife. A lot of single women that I know have more than 10k sitting in their accounts. This? Wow . Not surprised though.
💯 Spot on. We’re the only ethnic group debating this nonsense. Glad I was raised within a family were men lovingly, and without resentment provided for their household. We’re not mules.
Marriage is a total partnership and each spouse has their role to play. My husband and I embrace pretty traditional gender roles so he works full time and pays all of our bills while I work part-time for ‘fun money’ (hair, nails, makeup, etc.) but I take care of pretty much everything at home. We are older though, so he’s had time to build a career that earns enough to pay for the household. That takes time. I left a six figure position to spend time at home with our young child and honestly, running a household is just as much work as any other full time job, if not more. My hubby barely has to lift a finger when he’s home and that’s an even exchange in our book. These ladies who want 100% providers are not wrong but I hope they are willing to play their own position in the household, and take care of everything. Also, not matter how much your man makes (mine makes in the mid $300k range) you still have to be responsible and live on a budget. Being with a provider doesn’t mean you have free range to just spend into oblivion on material items.
I don't understand why a woman want a job to depend on their mate. Anything could happen to him and when it does, you should be in a financial place that can help take care of the bills just like he did. Not only that, if it doesn't work you lose yourself in that type of behavior. To each is on I just don't understand that thinking. Females don't think longevity.
@@darlenebernard4288 That's why my education (I have a master's degree) and work history are already established. If necessary, can get back into the working world very easily. Of course, I also have plenty of savings and life insurance as well just in case anything unforeseen happens. I am not going to let fear of what might happen keep me from enjoying my family and my life and my hustle days are over. I am happy to depend on my amazing husband.
To list all the luxury handbags, cars & items your wife possess when you said yourself in a previous video she is very private & do not brag & boast, well you just did it for her🤷🏾♀️ I think you came off very superficial in this video. No one needed to know you make a million dollars a year. You could’ve gotten your message across without naming or price pointing anything you and your wife own. This video was very disappointing .
I don't see the humor your wife isn't paying 50/50. The labor a woman puts in around the house and working a job isn't 50/50. I don't need a roommate when I can provide for myself 100 percent and don't have to put up with a headache.
😂 super Blocked , he was strictly talking finance on some areas , Woman these days ,and she would be the same woman looking for a man to pay from them nails and Hair
Yup, I believe it. A lot of men from a particular generation felt this way. My neighbor was one of those men. His wife worked but he said he didn't need or want her money. He felt like that was "roommate" behavior.
@@LS-ph5qtplus, back then there was no such thing as a daycare…women had to stay home to look after the children and home. Everything was cooked homemade because there were no already prepared meals or fast foods. Women’s work was at home while the men left to work.
Yeah I think this is one of those “what works for you may not work for me. As a widow 8 years now. My husband and I was married 15 1/2 years when he passed 20 years together. Long story short we had the conversation before we married. I asked how he felt with me staying home. He said wait til he got to a particular place of income bracket. I agreed. GOD moved differently and I ended up home before time Hubby was not where he originally planned. He suggested I stayed at home and not go back after a series of events happened. Our FAITH was our currency! I always knew GOD had me and when I got married my FAITH never stop! We had GOD’S FAVOUR! Times were tight at times like most. We had two vehicles and a home built from the ground. It’s our heart posture and we both loved GOD. We weren’t perfect. GOD kept us. I always had my husband’s back and he always had mine. He even brought his checks home to me. We had shared accounts. So even direct deposits He brought the check receipts to me. Now I never was a gold digger so I’m sure he saw that right away. That makes a difference.
My dad / grandad & uncle raised me to know men look after their women & my dad always said you shouldn’t have to ask a man for nothing …. They should just give , only bums ask for 50/50 they wouldn’t embarrass themselves to ask a woman for 50/50
If you tell me that we’re going half-and-half, I’m gone. If you say that you were going to provide for me, whatever you can provide, but what you have.. and if you want more then you’re gonna have to step up. One thing you will have to do is put the roof over my head. I’ll pay the utilities if I had kids that were under age I would buy all the food not just a portion.. if you lose your job I’ll foot the bill until you get another one. if you take too long work at McDonald’s..
Partnership ends when it’s time for men who are not 100% providers to step up and manage the home and the children 🙄 I know Tony speaks to women, but it needs to be said that a lot of men who are not 100% providers are blind on what’s required from them in modern day marriages/family.
Men understand that tho . That’s why the marriage rate dropped and more men from 2023 on further aren’t having kids as much anymore either. More men are smartening up more than you might think. More men found out it’s better being a bachelor doing what you want and free and without kids
@@nakooshaalbert8884 I think it’s important for a reasonable man, whose primary audience is men, to get men hip to what’s going on with modern relationships. I think this would help a lot since social media has such a huge impact on culture now.
I think most women don't have a problem going 50/50 on bills...the issue is the husband still expecting her to do all the housework and child rearing. Then there's also the fear of building with a man, going 50/50 with him...all for him to leave you for someone else when he gets up then pays 100 for her...
Tony’s right! My husband loves that I'm a stay-at-home wife and being a 100% provider. I'm stress-free and peaceful which in turn makes us both happy. 💅🏾
I'm not married yet and don't have kids.These comments are a little scary..lol.Glad to see your comment....although I plan on contributing to the houusehold.
@@djredd1225 Thank you for clarification, however, I must underline that even if a woman does not work a job, she can still contribute financially by uplifting her husband with her presence and the little things she does to make his life better. Incidentally, this is the reason why girlfriends get heartbroken after contributing to a man's success and the man leaves her in a better state than how she found him, while she is in a worse state. The presence of a woman, especially an excellent one, is contribution to a man's life, especially a forward-thinking husband.
Facts! It just costs too much to live nowadays. I make 6 figs and I'm looking at getting a part time job now too lol. Inflation has affected us all and it's just not realistic to believe you won't have to contribute something to the bills. Focus on partnership and stop listening to what's on social media like TG said
I realized that too. Maybe if the man earn 500k or more and y’all live below your means it might be doable but how many people earn that much realistically 🤷🏾♀️
My sister works but he pays whole mortgage she works part time she’s married but nope she don’t got designer but she was able to stay to stay home first few months her kids were born she has to work to get the groceries n lite bill phone bill due to inflation but she’s blessed to not able to work full time if she don’t want to
Actually you need to read the scriptures because Jezebel was not a whore she was a married woman who controlled her husband through manipulation and rebellion. Church traditions calls her a whore but the Bible never does.
I’m sorry Tony I’m gonna have to disagree with you. I finally made six figures as a nurse and when I see that there’s so many men that truly refused to put in work go to school get a degree get to the professional level it’s ridiculous, especially black men and then, they come to you and they want you to go 50-50, and then cook and clean makes no sense.
I hollered when he said “she-witch!” That’s exactly what they are though 💯 we’ve gotten so far away from what marriage really is and it’s so much delusion out here. Literally I saw a woman in her 30s saying she wants a man to come save her. Nobody is coming to save you. You have to save yourself.
i listened to the whole video before commenting hoping that Tony would discuss what a productive family structure looks like. I remember the difference it made as a child when my mom worked vs. when she didn’t work. We all want to be there for our children the same way his wife is there for his. Where Tony hit the nail on the head was when he talked about lifestyle. We have to be comfortable living on our husband’s income and willing to make lifestyle changes that match it so we can still be a homemaker (and good homemakers can do this on a budget) The lady in that story was crazy and i believe she was an anomaly. Most women will help their man financially when necessary. I think the conversation is misunderstood by Tony because when women talk abt a man being 100% provider, it’s about him having the mindset to WANT to be; not necessarily that he is right now (even Tony said a half decent man will want to do this) but so many men say they don’t and that’s where women are upset, because some men don’t even have the mindset to ever want to provide
My Dad provided (and still provides) for my Mom and their children (us). ***He never required my mom pay for anything NOR did he ever ask her, "What do you bring to the table?"*** ========================= My Dad said he was ready to get married and wanted to have a family (since he grew up as an only child with a single mother). ======================== Later in their marriage, my Mom did earn money ( part time---for herself --and for their teenage daughters (us)--and/or for anything extra), but only because she WANTED to (not because my Dad required her to do so). ======================== ======================= P.S. They did NOT have a big wedding/reception/party. ****They had a traditional ceremony in a church (wedding dress/suit/bridesmaids/etc.) and a little reception at a friends apartment.****They opted for a trip (honeymoon). ===================== ====================
I pray my husband and I sit down, evaluate, and pray about how to approach our finances that will not bring stress, strain, or resentment to our foundation. Finances is a subject that is barely discussed beyond the surface, from realistic lens, or thoroughly navigated but sex, sexual positions, how many times a day is 🙄🤦🏾♀️ finances, expenses and all things money related must be discussed before marriage along with addressing and handling individual debts before coming together collectively.
Thank you for your perspective, Tony. I will say that the Bible doesn’t say the woman provides as we all know. There are single mothers working full time and being the primary caretaker for their kids. Those women are stressed and upset (many). In a fifty fifty relationship nothing changes for that lady really. Cause she’s still working full time and being the primary caretaker of the children. Let’s say most people have been in that situation of fifty-fifty.. Perhaps a man when he was young was fifty fifty with his wife or she paid most of the bills. Just because it might have happened for that man or woman, doesn’t mean they should encourage other people to do that. I found that men and woman when they have been in a certain situation they know it might not be that good but they would feel embarrassed to say it was wrong so instead they say it’s okay to do. Women are not designed to bear the stress of full time work to pay half the bills plus care for the children. Nothing wrong with a lady working but it should be an option. If it’s going to mean the kids get less care then she should be able to stay home. A good wife, if she sees the man is doing everything he has to - him working two jobs- and they still can’t make ends meet then she would of course look for work as a helpmate. Just my opinion. Thanks for everything. Life works different for everyone. Some men may say it’s fine to marry when they can’t fully support the family but some men will say they can’t marry until they can support the family. It just depends on what you want for your life.
I am actually surprised at all the negative comments on what Tony is saying. I make 6-figures as a single woman and I realized that I must be willing to help out the house finances if needed. I see marriage as a team effort. It would be awesome for my husband to provide 100% but that is not realistic to expect in every season of life because life will life. Hard times come for everyone. I think 60-40 is still acceptable and 50-50 happens more than people on the internet assumes. At the end of the day I want an integral spouse who is all in for our family. That kinda man will do what it takes to provide for us and I am willing to help him accomplish that goal for our family.
The reason that women are being more vocal about 50/50 is because women of certain cultures and those who were raised to be provided for saw so many women getting mistreated and having to pay so much just to get left and the man went to the next woman and provided for them. They saw this and felt bad because they never had to deal with that and they knew how much more valuable they felt and were treated and they spread the word to let them know they don’t have to deal with certain things. Now i don’t agree to bleed a man’s pockets dry and without savings either but the message was spread to get women who were being overly giving and overly sacrificing out of that space because women are not as strong as men and are more fragile when overworked.
I come from a traditional African background and seeing what my mom went through I WANT to work. I’m too valuable not to. My gifts are meant to be shared and I’ll be damned if I don’t get paid well over six figures to share my gifts with the world. I’ll find a partner in due time. I just live my life in the meantime. You’re helping more lives than you know Tony. Your wife is a woman who is also touching lives because she speaks through you. Y’all have taught me so much and allow me to live my life in a genuine way. I’ll definitely book a session one day just to say thank you but in the meantime I enjoy hearing all of your viewpoints.
Because he's horrible with his money. Why on earth does his wife have 3 cars and multiple designer bags when he claims it's "tight"? Plus who needs 3 cars for a single person? These people are idiots. I expect to be fully provided for but I learned at a very early age, about living within or even below your means. It was the best thing I ever learned.
He bragged about his wife cars, her handbags, the fact that she don’t have to work, he pays all the bills & funds her lifestyle but he makes 1 million dollars a year but its tight. Make it make sense. Please.
Love your video, but this 50/50 needs to be looked into more deeper, women need help around the home, pickup ,cleaning, shopping, this need to be address too. Thank you
And like he said good for you…but don’t forget you could lose it all and your man can be down hard one day and you’ll have to sacrifice some things if you don’t want to help work.
@@Bloom2Grow you are absolutely right. I'm widowed now, tho. 😢 Im so blessed and grateful that hubby still takes care of me. I'd do anything to have him back, tho.
😂😂😂 the only time I’ve ever disagreed with Tony. Seems no one in the comments agree as well. Rephrase and come back to us Tony cos how can you say u provide 100% and are asking us to go 50/50? Do you have a second family or are you abusive? No. But you are providing 100%. A woman will always do her part no matter how the world changes. A man should too. Bless you 🙏🏾
Honestly his last few videos have been on him leaning up on this headboard giving lazy & just talking to be talking just to stay in the atmosphere! He has been giving horrible advice lately. The smoke is settling.
I’m surprised I found THIS video! I had a heated argument with my guy & wanted to play TGs video about not dating a BB&D Man who wanna go 50/50. This is not the one I was expecting…I have to find the old videos dated at 5 years back. The message is dramatically different.
It never gets old when he impersonates a woman 😂 that’s why a person can watch 45 min of a video, because it’s just that person’s personality with a need to hear message
Uncle tony it’s different when he alway provide and then he can’t of course the wife will step in and help ! But going 50-50 from jump is a BIG NO NO !
As a single mother of 2 I will Not be doing 50/50. Unless I “HAVE” to. Especially if he wants children. My child birth experiences were traumatic. My situation alone might disqualify me 😂😂😂😂😂 Maybe in another life. But I’m definitely going to enjoy my little ole single life. You only have one life to live 😊😌. Like these videos!
I honestly hate this discussion because it’s not one size fits all. Some women are very high earners and don’t mind splitting bills. Some men are nurturers and don’t mind cooking and taking care of the kids. When I worked outside the home my husband had dinner on the table everyday when I got home. And even though I made more than him (we both make 6 figures), he paid the mortgage and took care of insurance and stuff while I paid for groceries and utilities. I hate cooking and he loves to cook, and that’s perfect for me so I don’t mind paying a few bills because money is just money to me. It’s teamwork, plain and simple. You split the responsibilities in whatever way is most comfortable for BOTH of you.
I was taught by my father that a man of the house should pay majority of the bills. Not 50 50. If he can’t afford that then he needs to put his head down and work harder until he can. And if he wants to mess up the house hold he worked so hard for because he now got the money that is a stupid man who will never be great
I have always made more money in my relationships & the men wanted 50/50. I pray to meet a man who will be a 100% provider , I just don’t even think I ever will . Where are these men with the mentality and ability to provide 100%? I have accepted to be my own provider if that’s God’s will for me.
Sometimes it boils down to culture. I live in a predominantly Jewish neighborhood for over 20 years, with approx. 30 Jewish families on my street and none of the women work outside the home. The husbands are the sole providers. We're all in the same year, 2024.
I AM A PROVERBS 31 WOMAN. BEEN SINCE THE 1970'S !!! MY CANDLE DOES NOT GO OUT BY NIGHT.... LOYAL FAITHFUL GOOD COOK, CREATIVE, ENTREPRENEUR IAL, ETC. AND STILL ENDED UP ALONE TAKING CARE OF MY TWO KIDS. 😮
People need to do what works for them. Most people do 50/50. There are plenty of husbands pay all the bills and women on tik tok still complaining . People need to do what works and not believe everything on the internet
A man can't carry a child 50% of the time. He can't breastfeed 50% of the time. His total body/chemistry can't carry 50% of what she goes through. It seems also that men just don't consider what struggle "love" does to a woman. We can have any arrangement we come up with but don't pretend not to understand the effects 'cause Yada done said it. And if he didn't say it, look at the state of our "community."
Women have worked harder with much less rights and say so for ages. Being pregnant for 9 months doesnt equate to putting up financially in a household especially when you both work.
I don’t disagree with him often but I do not want a struggle love and it seems that’s what his wife had to do in order to be with him as a millionaire. Amazing that y’all have a good life style now but you are an exception to the rule. If a woman builds a man up or help him in a rough time, he will most likely leave you but you loved her to stay. I don’t believe a man should necessarily do 100% of the finances but more than 50% is acceptable.
I am so glad he realized his home came first. His wife spoke the truth about his family's priorities being out of order. He truly loves his wife and family. God bless you both!
@@texcoco41Truthfully I haven’t looked at the comments 😅 but I’m thankful for your comment because you clarified what is being said and you are absolutely correct. Any woman or man who opposes what Coach says is someone who does not want marriage. 💯🤞🏾✨
I think this may be a little bit out of touch with most women actually experience although you are correct in your sentiment the reality is most men either dont know how to cook and clean or still apply to traditional values where the woman does all the cooking and cleaning and taking care of the kids even when she works. So women know going 50/50 financially actually means 70/30 in the fullness of the relationship since she's still going to have to do the bulk of everything else. Just most womens reality
In some of TG's previous videos, he talks extensively about the numerous material possessions he owns, such as cars, and so on. However, this comes across as boasting to some viewers. As a new viewer of his videos, I have noticed that he also shares valuable insights and appears to be humble.
He is 100% boasting and bragging about all the material items his wife has but says he makes 1 million dollars a year but its still tight🤷🏾♀️ That sounds like he is living well above his means with all the superficialness. His message for sure can get lost in that.
Umm Tony you have my upmost respect. You’re being realistic and as much as I want the soft life and a man that’s willing to assist in such, I do not have to be delusional in my attempt to do so. Thanks for touching on colorism as well.
Men aren’t our slaves, they are supposed to be our leaders and the head of household- This is God’s order period. 50/50 isn’t in the Bible anywhere regarding marriages. What I am saying has nothing to do with a jezebel spirit either- I’m talking about emotionally healed God-fearing women because we may lay low but we do in fact exist. If our husbands go through a Job season, that’s one thing. In that case, of course we are going to be there to be the extra support because of the season our marriage is in. But I’m going to have to draw that line in the sand with TG because if we’re going to bring up a Proverbs 31 woman, let’s talk about how she was able to be that kind of woman. Her husband was respected at the city gates. Clearly he was a model type husband if his wife was able to do so much -not only in their home but also outside of the home for the community. I doubt that he was requiring her to be a super wife- it was a glorious byproduct of a marriage and a household that was IN ORDER. We aren’t called to finish raising another woman’s grown son into being our husband. I’m happy that worked out well for TG and his wife but that doesn’t work out very well for the average woman. In the garden, God didn’t make Eve first and then tell her to teach Adam how to see the vision for their life. That’s out of order. I expect you to know this and not make secular provisions for a depraved society. So are you trying to be a voice for the women in the body of Christ or women of the world who aren’t even thinking about God? I need to know. P.S. I prefer not to be blocked- I actually enjoy your content. Just not this one so much. Just a voice crying out in the wilderness saying make straight the way of the Lord🗣️
This was such a very real topic of discussion here! Great work!!! Many women dont realize that yes there are men that can pay 100% but they are not in abundance and/or they may be controlling or not generous. If they were in abundance, every woman would have one. I'm not advocating for 50/50, but what im saying is take each situation as it comes. Every relationship is unique. Make a choice that's going to work for you. Every woman is not going to have a man who can pay 100 or who will pay 100. That's just the truth.
I wish you would really support your wife just being qualified. Possibly…some of the qualities she showed (during the interview) were some of the same qualities shown when you picked her as a wife. Why would the hiring agent have to be prejudice to pick your wife over others. Were you prejudice in your pick of her or was she just the best choice for you. ❤
Ladies, unless we find another Tony Gaskins, I believe it not wise to put our financial fate in the hands of a MAN., or anyone for that matter. Find your gifts and talents, make money off of that, and enjoy your life as best as you can, because the man we desire may never show up. Keep pushing and praying ladies. I speak from a peaceful heart, therefore am not triggered by Tony’s message. I endorse it 100% 🙌🙏🏻
I think the issue that woman have with 50/50 is that woman are working just as much as the man & contributing financially but then coming home and doing 100% of the housework and child care. This is coming from a married mother who works full time. A lot of men use providing as an excuse not to help around the house.
Correct if I’m a housewife I can only do that full time without working if I work to I’m not being only one cookin n cleaning n helping the kids but the father should be able to help with kids homework baths from time to time for bonding it’s his kids too
Facts
Respectfully, this is often NOT the case. I live in a middle to upper middle class neighborhood. Most of the families could survive with a single income but most have dual incomes. Most of the men do yard work as well as home maintenance. Most of these families actually have maid services that clean up the house.
Ultimately, what I'm saying is that you'll find plenty of millennial men that contribute sufficiently to the household duties.
@@RemIsNice you might want to come out of Pleasantville cuz majority of women out here are having the same complaints. Im sure these women wish they can afford maid service to help them out cuz the men ain't doing it.
I was married also and my ex wasn't providing, he wasn't doing ish around the house. He was my 3 rd child ain't nobody got time for that
Thank you for sharing this perspective on marriage. I never knew this. I had an unrealistic expectation on what it takes to make a marriage works. I never knew I had to go 50/50. I totally get it. Your videos are needed. Thank you
(7:50) SHOULD you always living at your income level? We still have to be good stewards of what God gives us.
All household duties should be 50/50 regardless, but me personally I don't like 50/50 financially especially if he makes more money than I do then he should be covering rent and bills. Doesn’t take 2 incomes to cover one set of bills. My income should take care of something else such as paying off debts, saving for different categories such as shopping, date nights, vacations, new home, new car, emergency fund, etc. That's just how I feel about it.
This is so honest
Idc about the 50/50 cus if I had a team mate. It would be easier because I wouldn’t have to pay the bills on my own. I would like a partner that we could both live comfortable. I want Character,reliability, respect, love
Now, lets do a video on how men take care of their mom and sisters but the wife is going without. 💯👌🏾
Go watch universe guru she is very well versed on relationships and how to get your man to see you as a priority by invoking his emotional response like their family members do. They only do that for them because they known him longer but if you take that space they have to fall in line behind you. You can’t be threatened you have to come across as if you care bout them too but you make him see your needs as more important.
Also taking care of their grown children..
THAT PART!!!
Christian men shouldn't be behaving this way. Now for secular men thats a whole other can of worms
@daniidivinity I've asked many men this question and they always give the same answer, mom and sisters are blood, their wife is not.
I agree with the sentiment that a husband and wife should be partners, in every sense of the word. The problem starts to rear it's ugly head when the man works, and the woman works... But the man also expects the woman who works to work, cook, clean, help the kids with homework, give them baths, put them to bed and then take care of her wifely duties. Then it becomes a demand on us instead of a partnership. Then, the man works so hard ( physically) that he is tired, and wants to be pleased but puts no energy into pleasing his wife after SHE worked, helped the kids with homework, cooked, gave them baths, ect. Not to mention we have to dedicate time for God, praying, rebuking, meditating... It becomes 75/25 or 80/20. It never actually gets to 50/50 or 100/100...
We just want acknowledgement that our role and duties matter. We want our efforts in lovemaking to be reciprocal. We just want our man to invest as much emotionally as we do. So we can be on the same page in our journey and purpose.
Right this video ignores this so bad. So many women, especially black women, over decades have complained about it not truly being 50/50 for real. That’s really when infidelity happens, the wife is worn down so bad that she neglects her looks and doesn’t want to be touched so the husband goes out to cheat. And a lot of the time, we don’t know what we’re getting into until we’re in the marriage already and having to deal with it.
exactly!!
Did you hear what he said, he said if it’s 50/50 then the man should share the Household duties. Don’t get a man that’s wants you to pay 50/50 and wants you to do all the housework, that’s not the man for you.
@@MersayW we don’t know what a man will do after getting married. Just cuz he says he’ll help with housework doesn’t mean he actually will or sometimes they’ll act like they’re incompetent just so they won’t be asked to help anymore. That’s a real thing.
I felt like Tony acknowledged your concerns but he was speaking to women who think they don’t have to work or contribute to the household because they are women due to this idea of a 100% provider man. It’s arrogant to assume someone wants to just care for you completely as an adult. All humans are flawed and if you have someone who helps you in anyway you should be thankful. Don’t settle for scraps but also don’t piss on good efforts.
I’m single with no kids, and I’m swimming in cash 🙌🏾❤️💪🏾 Didn’t realize how blessed I was.
WE WINNING OVER HERE😂🎉👏🏾👏🏾
@@Twister_numba24 okkkkkkurrrr, period 🙋🏾♀️💁🏾♀️
Me too 🙌🏾
@@cordneydriver316 ❤️❤️❤️❤️
more single woman are buying houses than single men lmfao and i know tons of woman that have 10k in savings including more than that' and that's my mother! hahaha like what😂better off single than with a dust bucket.
Couples gotta do what works for them. 👌🏾
I will agree with RC BLAKES on that one..a man wanting 50/50 is a bozo period.
Me too.
Unless that’s just the financial circumstances they are in at the time. Otherwise 50/50 sounds a bit selfish coming from a man, that can provide.
Same
I think reasonable women should contribute. It doesn’t necessarily mean equally. But women should contribute tbh. I always think of my brothers in situations like this and I wouldn’t want them drowning in bills while their wife feels she shouldn’t have to contribute anything.
@EsiriE I think your brothers should aim for it though. A woman is freed to do a lot fir husband and home when she doesn't have to worry about money.
50/50 isn't a problem if the man is also doing 50% of the domestic work and is taking care of the kids 50% of the time. The problem is that rarely happens. Women almost always end up sacrificing more in marriage and relationships. One of reasons I would never have kids with a man unless I was wealthy enough to hire a nanny and a part time maid so I can still pursue my purpose and career goals. Otherwise it isn't worth it for women who don't want to be a SAHM.
Right don’t leave the domestic work out more likely man without character morals is going to get home same time kick off shoes n want u to handle the kids by urself just because ur the mom I dnt mind help payn bills n working a lot women are working now more then men
What’s a SAHM
@@GodDogPassport Stay at home mom
@@rayofsunshine1267 thank you I’m a dog mom so don’t know mommy acronyms.
Yes!
😂😂😂😂😂🤣 someone asked me what am I bringing to the table but just because he asked me that question it was a no go. I do have something to bring to the table but if you have to ask me that question you’re not for me..
Yeah that’s corney to hear somthing like that it seems very rehearsed
I agree
Same here! I stopped talking to a guy who asked me that!
WORD SIS!!!
This video I am not agreeing with, women can 100 percent take care of themselves and the ones that cant can go get a dusty man.
This is one of the few things that I disagree with Tony on.
You’re supposed to live BELOW YOUR MEANS, unless you’re living in poverty. If you’re living in poverty, you shouldn’t be seeking a wife to join you until you have basic STABILITY.
Regardless to the economy, a wife can’t fully respect a husband who won’t fully provide.
I’ve lived this life, and it took sacrifice to live within my husband’s means. He was a security guard, but he INSISTED on being the sole provider, because he was taught this by a man who also lived this.
I had my own money, and he refused to spend a dime of it on our household bills. I’m proud of him for that, and I’m proud of myself for being willing to sacrifice material luxuries, and keeping up with the Jones’s for a higher principle.
Tony, I’ve heard you say that you don’t believe in living below your means. You want to live AT your means, and that’s fine for your family, but not a good financial or economic principle.
Not living below your means means that the average person will always be strained and stressed out trying to keep above water.
The man ALWAYS sacrifices some respect when he needs a woman to pay for basic NEEDS. The man also sacrifices some respect whenever he’s willing to work his wife just so that he can enjoy more luxuries. The women and children pay a price too.
It’s definitely doable for those who live by a principle. Any man who can abstain from sex based on a principle, can definitely PAY ALL BILLS in any economy. Our forefathers did this, and took pride in it.
Our modern men need to strengthen their will and resolve to be men, and us women must let them and REQUIRE them to be men.
Yes, the wives must fulfill their domestic duties as well. If you are 50/50, then I agree that chores should be 50/50. But if we’re being honest, we must admit that masculinity isn’t wired that way.
This is the exact comment that I was looking for. ❤️
You need to look at the cost of living. Below your means is not possible to live nicely.
Classy and truthful response👏🏽
@MH-wj5ui everyone's MEANS isn't to live nicely.... what one person's life look like doesn't mean that's what everyone else's life should look like ESPECIALLY if they're not putting in the same amount of effort and performing at high levels
@@taxcitybagtalk Your response is contradictory. Again, educating oneself on what it takes to live nicely and respectably is at an all time high due to inflation. People need to have realistic expectations of availability of partners that can provide on one income per family. A review of the middle class income and the cost of housing alone does not make this feasible to the majority.
I’m not doing 50/50, I’m sorry. I can just die alone.😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂
😂😂😂
Not at this big ol age 🤣🤣💯
If my husband pays 100% of the bills, provides for all of my needs and I don’t have to work, what do you think I will do? Whatever he says!
PERIOD!
THANK YOU
Especially if he’s good leader & sweet and loving. Of course I’ll be submissive and do whatever I can to please him
Not here. That's foolish. He will pay 100% of the bills AND still do whatever he needs to do around the house. I will never be that desperate for a man to where his only contribution would be to pay the bills. I can do that myself easily.
I have a friend that left her guy because of 50/50. He makes 6 times the salary she make. This is unfair. She would literally be struggling while he is just fine. When incomes aren’t the same, it should be based off percentages.
Totally agree with you! 👏 I read about a male doctor who expected his girlfriend who was doing her residency, to pay him 50/50 rent towards his condo. So, she was earning way less, but contributing toward his condo without ownership in it and they could break up at anytime... 🤦🙄
A husband that makes more than his wife should pay the bulk of the bill. (Mortgage) If you want a 50/50 partnership get a roommate. A good man provides for his family. A good woman manages the household makes a house a home. 💯
@@J_Elle30 I agree with Tony’s video. This situation doesn’t apply to the general audience he was targeting. I don’t think he would say to 50/50 in this situation. I brought this up because there are men like this that want to go 50/50 when it’s clearly unfair.
Agree but Tony referring to marraige n b honest some guys cheat when they payin fifty fifty cus they not all way in love cause if so wouldn’t want to be fifty he would want to provide more than half atleast 80 percent because in reality she’s cookn cleaning for him handing other needs
Ain’t no way I get men who makes that much more than me n give me Pennie’s it’s like he’s givn unify $100 a month wen he makes 10k a month
Just b/c we make more money don't mean we should spend more money. 💯
Exactly! Unfortunately, most ppl can't resist "lifestyle creep". The more they make, the more money they spend.
This! 🙌 my parents are both accountants and they taught me to live off of 30K that I made waitressing all throughout college while being happy, fast forward 6 years later, I still live that way making way more with 2 degrees, child free and patiently waiting for my boyfriend to propose so we can move on to the next phase of life together, learning to live on 30K saved me in this economy.
Exactly, that's why so many people are hood rich and not wealthy.....📌📍‼️
Agree. Tony should take some financial management and accounting classes sounds like. If they almost lost their home and keep having to sell purses, it may be time to reconsider getting them or downsizing.
Tony i have listened to you for a while. This may be the only post that i do not agree with you. Some people are very happy with life not making A million dollars and having 5 cars in the garage. There is nothing wrong with having one car. As if that woman was less of a lady because she had one car. But she also didnt pay any bills in her home. Thats being financially savvy. Many of us are wise earners and financially smart. You seem to be profiling your assets in this post and expensive material items are only worldly possessions. Im a 6 figure single woman and I live very comfortable. You dont need to prove anything to anyone but your wife. Im not sure how bragging on your lifestyle is helpful here . . .😊
I agree 100%!!
For years, decades women (especially black women) have been paying and still expected to pay 50/50 of the finances. Which has often turned into the woman paying 80 percent, then 100 percent if the man looses his job or stops being consistently employed. Wanting to and having to pay 50/50 of finances are two different things. A woman shouldn't have to go 59/50 on finances if she doesn't want to. Especially taking care of children and the house most of the time.🙏🙏🙏
This is probably by far the only video of yours I 100% disagree with. This isn’t even on brand for you. Nothing you talk about even faintly ties to going 50/50 with a man. You weren’t a “bum” when your wife met you. Nor looking for a woman to take care of you. You had vision and was already independent.
Statistics reveal more women are financially contributing at least 50% or more to their households. Singles moms contribute 100%. If a woman can do it alone, why can’t a man?
The way women are down bad right now and being financially taking advantage by men from ALL walks of life, this is a very very dangerous narrative to push. You see it yourself everyday. 50/50 is the new “have my cake and eat it too” for A LOT of men. There may men that are genuinely in these positions and will provide in their success season, but that is among the FEW.
I saw the wedding post you’re referring to in your video and I could tell it was a false story. A new narrative to push by toxic and red-pill men to distract us from the news of passport bros being murdered overseas. We have to do better and not fall for clickbait.
Ladies, protect yourselves and your wombs. 50/50 may sound logical, until you are burdened with children, a husband, and still your portion of 50.
Bless.
So now you gonna block us cuz we disagree? 😂😂
Tony, you sound like you living above your means … thats all
God created men to provide so he should provide. If a woman wants to help him that should be her choice and not obligatory. Of course any good woman will help her man if he is struggling but that man must be her husband not her boyfriend.
I agree ☝️
Agree. Plus Tony was talking about the early days of their marriage when they were early 20s. He himself said by the time he was 28 things were different.
Genesis 2
18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a HELPER who is just right for him.”
24 This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
God created women to be a helpmate to man. You need to put your reading glasses on and read again..
Im fine with 80/20. If he falls on hard times, no problem.. i got him.. but I dont even think my man would allow me to pay 50/50 🤷🏾♀️
No disrespect intended Tony but I must disagree on this one. Yes, your good lady wife took over financially when the times called for it but most women will if children are part of the picture. If no kids were born yet would your wife have done the same? I don't think a woman should ever go 50/50 financially with any man. It benefits the man and wears a woman out. I don't care if it's just a one person tent a couple has to sleep in, you can be guaranteed it will be "her" job to clean it lol. Studies show time and time again that women do the vast majority of domestic/ childcare even when bills are split evenly. As I said, nothing but respect for you and your wife but your take on this is wrong.
Yea I couldn’t agree with this one. I’m single and I refuse to have a man lead me and be the head but I’m paying half the bills and then do all the housework when I come home too while he kicks his feet up. I’m all for partnership and am willing to work part time but I’m not entering a marriage where I have to work just as hard as my husband to make life work. I can do that alone just like I’m doing now. I understand that hard times hit which is why I’m willing to work part time so that I wouldn’t have gaps in my resume to where I’d be un-hirable
@@deasyastarr well said. Another thing Tony didn't really think about on this one is he's part of a tiny fraction of 1% of men who make 250k plus. 99.99% of men out there will never make enough to be a sole provider so a woman would be 50/50 for decades the vast majority of the time 🤷♀️
@@angelicaangel2624 maybe it’s because I don’t have dreams of having this crazy luxurious lifestyle that I’m looking to have a 80/20 marriage when it comes to finances. I’m fine with living in a two bedroom house or apartment, having decent cars, and pretty much doing the same things for my self care that I’m able to maintain now. I don’t want designer clothes and bags and I’m fine with at least one nice vacation a year. I don’t think it takes a millionaire for two people to live comfortably and I don’t want children so that’s less money to spend. I guess so many women want this over the top lifestyle so maybe he’s talking to them and not me lol
@@deasyastarrlet’s be real, Your being reasonable and compromising as a 31 year old man, the obsession with lifestyle today is astronomical. I see a ton of women here bucking the message cause it finally doesn’t agree with their narrative. 75k is the median household income in the US. I make over six figures but I also help my mom (I pay the mortgage she does the smaller bills) why? Cause she works in daycare and sacrificed for me to come to America. I pretty much have given up on dating. Because since my salary Is all that matters it will always be cut short and I see it as a duty to help my mom.
@@Pandering_equalsmoney I mean I can’t knock what other women want, they’ll just need to find a man who can provide the lifestyle they’re trying to live and men need to find women that they are able to provide for or live within their means with. Sadly social media has created this heard mentality where a lot of people aren’t inclined to just be themselves and choose the life path that’s most true to them because I’m sure many people would not want to have the exact same lifestyle as everybody else if they weren’t worried about competing and worried about what someone else has to say about their lifestyle. A lot of people end up unhappy that way.
Um we still in the time but they not providing still being treated like property cheated on beat on and they have several family too. All that and they have the audacity to have their hand out. Its never 50/50 women have a heavy load. I see it worldwide. Get your money ladies. Leave these dusties
True facts 💯
Many of us can take care of ourselves without a man. If the man cannot do anything for you besides intimacy and paying half the bills you are NOT gaining anything.
The only thing that changes is you can afford a bigger space to live by having two incomes. You can have that with a roommate!
Plus doing this 50/50 thing you end up with more meals to cook, more laundry, and more cleaning. Men aren’t as tidy as women on average, plus helping all the kids since we are better at it.
I recommend all men and women look at the couples of men and women in their 60s/70s where the women worked full time. Almost every single time the woman looks way way way older than the man.
That’s not fair to the woman! Women end up looking a mess when they have all that added stress!!!
My husband pays the major household bills and I am willing to live within his means. When I was working at the start of the marriage (even from homr) I wasn’t able to be the best wife I could be and focus on my husband when I wanted to. As soon as I stopped working I got pregnant that same month!!
And remember! For the man to even take you as a wife back in the day the man had to prove he could care for you and provide for you!
What you said about the women ending up looking a mess is sooo real 🤣 but women just get on with it and carry the load.
Back in what day? Life is very different today.
Yapanese
I broke it off with a man who wanted me to go 50/50. If he can't afford a woman, then he doesn't deserve one. I told him I wasn't cooking, cleaning, and paying bills. He wasn't going to get a sandwich out of me. He also thought he was going to be the head. Not in this lifetime or the next. Women have 100% control of what they allow.
Women have been taught that a man’s love goes where his money goes. If he doesn’t want to share his money with her, she doesn’t feel that he really loves her. 50/50 for some men is not because they can’t afford it. For some it’s , I’m not sharing my money with you!
He will spend that extra money on some side women that “didn’t let herself go” anyways .. yet be mad his wife is going 50/50 looking like a mess.
Off topic can you please speak on the 70 yr old man saying he’s FINALLY ready to “settle down” 😑 and “hospice wives”? I’m floored.
Yes! I woild love to hear Tony's perspective on the "Hospice Wife" finesse game that some men are playing!
Oh my I’ve Not heard of this but am not surprised one bit ! 💀
Wow that's crazy, would love to hear speak on that smh lol
Tony I’m definitely a supporter of your work and have been rocking with you for years. But this fear and scarcity mindset you are pushing on ladies regarding men providing is wild. Telling them that they have to go back to accepting another family and no voting rights to get that is crazy. Yes I agree that they need to be partners, and it can’t be all about what they are receiving…..but how about just living within the means a man can provide and the woman taking care of him? That is a thing. A man doesn’t need to make millions to provide
I love your channel Tony been a follow for years but I will have to disagree.If I have to go 50/50 with a man financially he is just a roommate and shouldn't ask me to sleep with him then if he don't want to have to take care of kids too because what if I get pregnant I will have to stay home anyway on maternally leave.I say a man should at least be able to rent a house in a decent neighborhood it doesn't have to be expensive.
I think Tony is absolutely right about a woman supporting her man (husband) in times of need, but i think he missed addressing the issue of so many men these days lacking ambition and direction..
Im thankful for my husband. We started off as 50/50 in the beginning of our marriage, I had no problem with that because he always treated me like a Queen and helped around the house. Fast forward to now we are 80/20. He pays all the major bills, insurance, and for dates. I just do the grocery shopping & pay for miscellaneous things ❤
Scripture says a man should be providing for his family, I think it’s different a woman working having an incoming and supporting when needed but it is the man’s role to provide for his family, no woman can give 100% to her family AND BE working and paying bills speaking as a mother
Tony’s 50/50 isn’t the same as the culture’s definition of it.
No one wants to be in a relationship with a leech.
Marriage is about teamwork.
Also, many American parents are not paying for weddings, and that’s okay.
It would better serve a couple to opt for a cost friendly wedding.☺️
I like the idea of a small wedding honeymoon combo.💍🏝️ Inform family & friends about y’all’s decision and keep it moving.💓
i feel like in today’s culture, they automatically resort to the financial aspect regarding 50/50 when within a relationship, 50/50 is NOT just about finances. like you said, it’s the teamwork
Is Mrs Gaskins really having that nice life ...I wonder or it's all a talk, big, fat talk of Mr Tony, while she does all the actual work while he is laying on his sofa, busy being an "influencer" and still wanting her to do full 50/50?
DUH…
Pay 50/50 so he can have enough money leftover to spend on his side chicks …
😂😂😂 who are you talking about? You don’t know what the next woman has. that’s the problem men are not giving us any value.
This is so spot on. Some women THINK they want a marriage where the man pays 100% but like you said you’re not just doing nothing. I’ll add if he’s trying REALLY trying, DONT LISTEN TO FAMILY regarding your partner. Stay the course.
This video just confirmed a whole lot for me. My instincts where right. My goodness. Wow. And in most culture the man pay for everything gladly. In my culture, it shows he can take care of his wife. A lot of single women that I know have more than 10k sitting in their accounts. This? Wow . Not surprised though.
What were your instincts?
💯 Spot on. We’re the only ethnic group debating this nonsense. Glad I was raised within a family were men lovingly, and without resentment provided for their household. We’re not mules.
Marriage is a total partnership and each spouse has their role to play. My husband and I embrace pretty traditional gender roles so he works full time and pays all of our bills while I work part-time for ‘fun money’ (hair, nails, makeup, etc.) but I take care of pretty much everything at home. We are older though, so he’s had time to build a career that earns enough to pay for the household. That takes time. I left a six figure position to spend time at home with our young child and honestly, running a household is just as much work as any other full time job, if not more. My hubby barely has to lift a finger when he’s home and that’s an even exchange in our book. These ladies who want 100% providers are not wrong but I hope they are willing to play their own position in the household, and take care of everything. Also, not matter how much your man makes (mine makes in the mid $300k range) you still have to be responsible and live on a budget. Being with a provider doesn’t mean you have free range to just spend into oblivion on material items.
I don't understand why a woman want a job to depend on their mate. Anything could happen to him and when it does, you should be in a financial place that can help take care of the bills just like he did. Not only that, if it doesn't work you lose yourself in that type of behavior. To each is on I just don't understand that thinking. Females don't think longevity.
@@darlenebernard4288 That's why my education (I have a master's degree) and work history are already established. If necessary, can get back into the working world very easily. Of course, I also have plenty of savings and life insurance as well just in case anything unforeseen happens. I am not going to let fear of what might happen keep me from enjoying my family and my life and my hustle days are over. I am happy to depend on my amazing husband.
I 100% agree with you. And I'm so happy for you💜
Sister, I’m 39 and been living traditional lifestyle since I married him at 19. It’s been 20 years and still in our traditional way. .
To list all the luxury handbags, cars & items your wife possess when you said yourself in a previous video she is very private & do not brag & boast, well you just did it for her🤷🏾♀️ I think you came off very superficial in this video. No one needed to know you make a million dollars a year. You could’ve gotten your message across without naming or price pointing anything you and your wife own. This video was very disappointing .
I don't see the humor your wife isn't paying 50/50. The labor a woman puts in around the house and working a job isn't 50/50. I don't need a roommate when I can provide for myself 100 percent and don't have to put up with a headache.
Yeah. Tony's dust has been showing lately
@@joyell821 ☠️
He said If a Man is able to then he will and the woman’s work around the house will suffice!!
You know you're getting BLOCKED! 😂😂
😂 super Blocked , he was strictly talking finance on some areas , Woman these days ,and she would be the same woman looking for a man to pay from them nails and Hair
Nahh baby…50/50 is a roommate
I was married to a man 30 yrs my senior and he said 50/50 was a roommate. 🤷🏾♀️
Yup, I believe it. A lot of men from a particular generation felt this way. My neighbor was one of those men. His wife worked but he said he didn't need or want her money. He felt like that was "roommate" behavior.
@@LS-ph5qtyou forget that was a different time and times have changed. The economy isn’t good right now and things are more expensive.
@@LS-ph5qtplus, back then there was no such thing as a daycare…women had to stay home to look after the children and home. Everything was cooked homemade because there were no already prepared meals or fast foods. Women’s work was at home while the men left to work.
@@Bloom2Grow Yes, that's true.
Yeah I think this is one of those “what works for you may not work for me. As a widow 8 years now. My husband and I was married 15 1/2 years when he passed 20 years together. Long story short we had the conversation before we married. I asked how he felt with me staying home. He said wait til he got to a particular place of income bracket. I agreed. GOD moved differently and I ended up home before time Hubby was not where he originally planned. He suggested I stayed at home and not go back after a series of events happened. Our FAITH was our currency! I always knew GOD had me and when I got married my FAITH never stop! We had GOD’S FAVOUR! Times were tight at times like most. We had two vehicles and a home built from the ground. It’s our heart posture and we both loved GOD. We weren’t perfect. GOD kept us. I always had my husband’s back and he always had mine.
He even brought his checks home to me. We had shared accounts. So even direct deposits He brought the check receipts to me. Now I never was a gold digger so I’m sure he saw that right away. That makes a difference.
I usually agree with you but you have said several really questionable things in this video but ok.
My dad / grandad & uncle raised me to know men look after their women & my dad always said you shouldn’t have to ask a man for nothing …. They should just give , only bums ask for 50/50 they wouldn’t embarrass themselves to ask a woman for 50/50
Yupp
If you tell me that we’re going half-and-half, I’m gone. If you say that you were going to provide for me, whatever you can provide, but what you have.. and if you want more then you’re gonna have to step up. One thing you will have to do is put the roof over my head. I’ll pay the utilities if I had kids that were under age I would buy all the food not just a portion.. if you lose your job I’ll foot the bill until you get another one. if you take too long work at McDonald’s..
Partnership ends when it’s time for men who are not 100% providers to step up and manage the home and the children 🙄 I know Tony speaks to women, but it needs to be said that a lot of men who are not 100% providers are blind on what’s required from them in modern day marriages/family.
He have videos on this already.. you may have to go further back!
Men understand that tho . That’s why the marriage rate dropped and more men from 2023 on further aren’t having kids as much anymore either. More men are smartening up more than you might think. More men found out it’s better being a bachelor doing what you want and free and without kids
@@EastsideDee-mk6xk I think it’s a good idea for men who do not want to partner with women to create a successful family to step back.
@@nakooshaalbert8884 I think it’s important for a reasonable man, whose primary audience is men, to get men hip to what’s going on with modern relationships. I think this would help a lot since social media has such a huge impact on culture now.
Thank you!
I think most women don't have a problem going 50/50 on bills...the issue is the husband still expecting her to do all the housework and child rearing. Then there's also the fear of building with a man, going 50/50 with him...all for him to leave you for someone else when he gets up then pays 100 for her...
Some****
Everyone doesn't need to be married. If you can't figure out how to be a sole provider you need to keep looking.
💯💯
Tony’s right! My husband loves that I'm a stay-at-home wife and being a 100% provider. I'm stress-free and peaceful which in turn makes us both happy. 💅🏾
Soft Wife Life is the best way.
I'm not married yet and don't have kids.These comments are a little scary..lol.Glad to see your comment....although I plan on contributing to the houusehold.
@@djredd1225 Soft wife life does not mean not contributing.
@tarawiselove My apologies. I meant to say contribute financially just a little.
@@djredd1225 Thank you for clarification, however, I must underline that even if a woman does not work a job, she can still contribute financially by uplifting her husband with her presence and the little things she does to make his life better.
Incidentally, this is the reason why girlfriends get heartbroken after contributing to a man's success and the man leaves her in a better state than how she found him, while she is in a worse state.
The presence of a woman, especially an excellent one, is contribution to a man's life, especially a forward-thinking husband.
Facts! It just costs too much to live nowadays. I make 6 figs and I'm looking at getting a part time job now too lol. Inflation has affected us all and it's just not realistic to believe you won't have to contribute something to the bills. Focus on partnership and stop listening to what's on social media like TG said
Same sis. I keep saying at this point every working person needs a minimum of 1.5 jobs.
I realized that too. Maybe if the man earn 500k or more and y’all live below your means it might be doable but how many people earn that much realistically 🤷🏾♀️
My sister works but he pays whole mortgage she works part time she’s married but nope she don’t got designer but she was able to stay to stay home first few months her kids were born she has to work to get the groceries n lite bill phone bill due to inflation but she’s blessed to not able to work full time if she don’t want to
Exactly. She contributes and they figured out what works for them.
@@intentionalgreatnessyep
It’s not a Jezebel a Jezebel spirit is not a whore. Nor is anyone that does not believe in going 50-50.
Actually you need to read the scriptures because Jezebel was not a whore she was a married woman who controlled her husband through manipulation and rebellion. Church traditions calls her a whore but the Bible never does.
Exactly🙌🫶, bc I don't there is a such thing as 50/50
The Jezebel comment was very offensive
I’m sorry Tony I’m gonna have to disagree with you. I finally made six figures as a nurse and when I see that there’s so many men that truly refused to put in work go to school get a degree get to the professional level it’s ridiculous, especially black men and then, they come to you and they want you to go 50-50, and then cook and clean makes no sense.
I hollered when he said “she-witch!” That’s exactly what they are though 💯 we’ve gotten so far away from what marriage really is and it’s so much delusion out here. Literally I saw a woman in her 30s saying she wants a man to come save her. Nobody is coming to save you. You have to save yourself.
Yes you better call on Jesus to save you, not a human being.😭
I burst out laughing while reading she wants to be saved!! She needs to marry Jesus!
@@Joytheanointed1 exactly! It’s ridiculous
@@nakiaaddison8129 it was a woman on a dating show
@@jessicascreenwritingservices wow!
i listened to the whole video before commenting hoping that Tony would discuss what a productive family structure looks like. I remember the difference it made as a child when my mom worked vs. when she didn’t work. We all want to be there for our children the same way his wife is there for his.
Where Tony hit the nail on the head was when he talked about lifestyle. We have to be comfortable living on our husband’s income and willing to make lifestyle changes that match it so we can still be a homemaker (and good homemakers can do this on a budget)
The lady in that story was crazy and i believe she was an anomaly. Most women will help their man financially when necessary.
I think the conversation is misunderstood by Tony because when women talk abt a man being 100% provider, it’s about him
having the mindset to WANT to be; not necessarily that he is right now (even Tony said a half decent man will want to do this) but so many men say they don’t and that’s where women are upset, because some men don’t even have the mindset to ever want to provide
Well said
My Dad provided (and still provides) for my Mom and their children (us).
***He never required my mom pay for anything NOR did he ever ask her, "What do you bring to the table?"***
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My Dad said he was ready to get married and wanted to have a family (since he grew up as an only child with a single mother).
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Later in their marriage, my Mom did earn money ( part time---for herself --and for their teenage daughters (us)--and/or for anything extra), but only because she WANTED to (not because my Dad required her to do so).
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P.S. They did NOT have a big wedding/reception/party. ****They had a traditional ceremony in a church (wedding dress/suit/bridesmaids/etc.) and a little reception at a friends apartment.****They opted for a trip (honeymoon).
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I pray my husband and I sit down, evaluate, and pray about how to approach our finances that will not bring stress, strain, or resentment to our foundation. Finances is a subject that is barely discussed beyond the surface, from realistic lens, or thoroughly navigated but sex, sexual positions, how many times a day is 🙄🤦🏾♀️ finances, expenses and all things money related must be discussed before marriage along with addressing and handling individual debts before coming together collectively.
The lady @ 21:00 "only" has 1 car and and 1 Louis Vuitton bag but that's still better than most people in the US much less the world.
Thank you for your perspective, Tony.
I will say that the Bible doesn’t say the woman provides as we all know. There are single mothers working full time and being the primary caretaker for their kids. Those women are stressed and upset (many). In a fifty fifty relationship nothing changes for that lady really. Cause she’s still working full time and being the primary caretaker of the children.
Let’s say most people have been in that situation of fifty-fifty.. Perhaps a man when he was young was fifty fifty with his wife or she paid most of the bills. Just because it might have happened for that man or woman, doesn’t mean they should encourage other people to do that. I found that men and woman when they have been in a certain situation they know it might not be that good but they would feel embarrassed to say it was wrong so instead they say it’s okay to do.
Women are not designed to bear the stress of full time work to pay half the bills plus care for the children. Nothing wrong with a lady working but it should be an option. If it’s going to mean the kids get less care then she should be able to stay home.
A good wife, if she sees the man is doing everything he has to - him working two jobs- and they still can’t make ends meet then she would of course look for work as a helpmate.
Just my opinion. Thanks for everything.
Life works different for everyone. Some men may say it’s fine to marry when they can’t fully support the family but some men will say they can’t marry until they can support the family. It just depends on what you want for your life.
Both people have to contribute to a relationship in a manner where each person feels cared for. Very important message ❤️
I am actually surprised at all the negative comments on what Tony is saying. I make 6-figures as a single woman and I realized that I must be willing to help out the house finances if needed. I see marriage as a team effort. It would be awesome for my husband to provide 100% but that is not realistic to expect in every season of life because life will life. Hard times come for everyone. I think 60-40 is still acceptable and 50-50 happens more than people on the internet assumes. At the end of the day I want an integral spouse who is all in for our family. That kinda man will do what it takes to provide for us and I am willing to help him accomplish that goal for our family.
The reason that women are being more vocal about 50/50 is because women of certain cultures and those who were raised to be provided for saw so many women getting mistreated and having to pay so much just to get left and the man went to the next woman and provided for them. They saw this and felt bad because they never had to deal with that and they knew how much more valuable they felt and were treated and they spread the word to let them know they don’t have to deal with certain things. Now i don’t agree to bleed a man’s pockets dry and without savings either but the message was spread to get women who were being overly giving and overly sacrificing out of that space because women are not as strong as men and are more fragile when overworked.
I come from a traditional African background and seeing what my mom went through I WANT to work. I’m too valuable not to. My gifts are meant to be shared and I’ll be damned if I don’t get paid well over six figures to share my gifts with the world.
I’ll find a partner in due time. I just live my life in the meantime. You’re helping more lives than you know Tony. Your wife is a woman who is also touching lives because she speaks through you. Y’all have taught me so much and allow me to live my life in a genuine way. I’ll definitely book a session one day just to say thank you but in the meantime I enjoy hearing all of your viewpoints.
Can't relate. Tony lost me when he said earning over a mil a year, it still get tight.
Lifestyle creep is a thing. Especially if you didn’t inherit financial literacy from family.
@@adarateranroldan it's called living above your means. Just don't do it. Simple.
Because he's horrible with his money. Why on earth does his wife have 3 cars and multiple designer bags when he claims it's "tight"? Plus who needs 3 cars for a single person? These people are idiots. I expect to be fully provided for but I learned at a very early age, about living within or even below your means. It was the best thing I ever learned.
He bragged about his wife cars, her handbags, the fact that she don’t have to work, he pays all the bills & funds her lifestyle but he makes 1 million dollars a year but its tight. Make it make sense. Please.
Never despise humble beginnings. I got married, in the courthouse and took pictures.🤷🏾♀️❤️
@@juneelle370 thank you❤️
I did as well.
Love your video, but this 50/50 needs to be looked into more deeper, women need help around the home, pickup ,cleaning, shopping, this need to be address too. Thank you
Women can easily make videos asking for that. Instead they flood comments sections like this with their whataboutism.
Whooo chile... thank God i aint on the dating scene cuz baybeee. Im spoiled.
And like he said good for you…but don’t forget you could lose it all and your man can be down hard one day and you’ll have to sacrifice some things if you don’t want to help work.
@@Bloom2Grow you are absolutely right. I'm widowed now, tho. 😢 Im so blessed and grateful that hubby still takes care of me. I'd do anything to have him back, tho.
@@SylviaLoveJones sorry to hear that! That is terrible
@Bloom2Grow thank you.
I now understand: it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. 💔
😂😂😂 the only time I’ve ever disagreed with Tony. Seems no one in the comments agree as well. Rephrase and come back to us Tony cos how can you say u provide 100% and are asking us to go 50/50?
Do you have a second family or are you abusive? No. But you are providing 100%. A woman will always do her part no matter how the world changes. A man should too. Bless you 🙏🏾
Honestly his last few videos have been on him leaning up on this headboard giving lazy & just talking to be talking just to stay in the atmosphere! He has been giving horrible advice lately. The smoke is settling.
I’m surprised I found THIS video! I had a heated argument with my guy & wanted to play TGs video about not dating a BB&D Man who wanna go 50/50. This is not the one I was expecting…I have to find the old videos dated at 5 years back. The message is dramatically different.
It never gets old when he impersonates a woman 😂 that’s why a person can watch 45 min of a video, because it’s just that person’s personality with a need to hear message
Uncle tony it’s different when he alway provide and then he can’t of course the wife will step in and help ! But going 50-50 from jump is a BIG NO NO !
As a single mother of 2 I will Not be doing 50/50. Unless I “HAVE” to. Especially if he wants children. My child birth experiences were traumatic. My situation alone might disqualify me 😂😂😂😂😂 Maybe in another life. But I’m definitely going to enjoy my little ole single life. You only have one life to live 😊😌. Like these videos!
I honestly hate this discussion because it’s not one size fits all. Some women are very high earners and don’t mind splitting bills. Some men are nurturers and don’t mind cooking and taking care of the kids. When I worked outside the home my husband had dinner on the table everyday when I got home. And even though I made more than him (we both make 6 figures), he paid the mortgage and took care of insurance and stuff while I paid for groceries and utilities. I hate cooking and he loves to cook, and that’s perfect for me so I don’t mind paying a few bills because money is just money to me.
It’s teamwork, plain and simple. You split the responsibilities in whatever way is most comfortable for BOTH of you.
I was taught by my father that a man of the house should pay majority of the bills. Not 50 50. If he can’t afford that then he needs to put his head down and work harder until he can. And if he wants to mess up the house hold he worked so hard for because he now got the money that is a stupid man who will never be great
This.
I have always made more money in my relationships & the men wanted 50/50. I pray to meet a man who will be a 100% provider , I just don’t even think I ever will . Where are these men with the mentality and ability to provide 100%? I have accepted to be my own provider if that’s God’s will for me.
It will happen for you….it’s rare…but kings are rare. Praying for you ♥️🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Sometimes it boils down to culture. I live in a predominantly Jewish neighborhood for over 20 years, with approx. 30 Jewish families on my street and none of the women work outside the home.
The husbands are the sole providers.
We're all in the same year, 2024.
I AM A PROVERBS 31 WOMAN. BEEN SINCE THE 1970'S !!! MY CANDLE DOES NOT GO OUT BY NIGHT.... LOYAL FAITHFUL GOOD COOK, CREATIVE, ENTREPRENEUR IAL, ETC. AND STILL ENDED UP ALONE TAKING CARE OF MY TWO KIDS. 😮
People need to do what works for them. Most people do 50/50. There are plenty of husbands pay all the bills and women on tik tok still complaining . People need to do what works and not believe everything on the internet
In this not a whole truth; I have been saying this for the longest "do what works for you".
Thissss
Facts
A man can't carry a child 50% of the time. He can't breastfeed 50% of the time. His total body/chemistry can't carry 50% of what she goes through. It seems also that men just don't consider what struggle "love" does to a woman. We can have any arrangement we come up with but don't pretend not to understand the effects 'cause Yada done said it. And if he didn't say it, look at the state of our "community."
Women have worked harder with much less rights and say so for ages. Being pregnant for 9 months doesnt equate to putting up financially in a household especially when you both work.
@@easyw1220ya no 😂
I don’t disagree with him often but I do not want a struggle love and it seems that’s what his wife had to do in order to be with him as a millionaire. Amazing that y’all have a good life style now but you are an exception to the rule. If a woman builds a man up or help him in a rough time, he will most likely leave you but you loved her to stay. I don’t believe a man should necessarily do 100% of the finances but more than 50% is acceptable.
I am so glad he realized his home came first. His wife spoke the truth about his family's priorities being out of order. He truly loves his wife and family. God bless you both!
I’m meeting more and more women married to gay men. I would like to know what this is all about🧐
“Marriage is Teamwork.” We Love You Coach 🙏🏾🤍✨
There are a lot of entitled women in the comments. I don't think they really want marriage to be honest.
@@texcoco41Truthfully I haven’t looked at the comments 😅 but I’m thankful for your comment because you clarified what is being said and you are absolutely correct. Any woman or man who opposes what Coach says is someone who does not want marriage. 💯🤞🏾✨
I have never been against 50/50 with my husband of 23 years who left me for another woman. She dumped him and now he us broke and alone
Throw the whole video away😂
I think this may be a little bit out of touch with most women actually experience although you are correct in your sentiment the reality is most men either dont know how to cook and clean or still apply to traditional values where the woman does all the cooking and cleaning and taking care of the kids even when she works. So women know going 50/50 financially actually means 70/30 in the fullness of the relationship since she's still going to have to do the bulk of everything else. Just most womens reality
I'm so confused right now. Is he talking about black women or white women?
In some of TG's previous videos, he talks extensively about the numerous material possessions he owns, such as cars, and so on. However, this comes across as boasting to some viewers. As a new viewer of his videos, I have noticed that he also shares valuable insights and appears to be humble.
He is 100% boasting and bragging about all the material items his wife has but says he makes 1 million dollars a year but its still tight🤷🏾♀️
That sounds like he is living well above his means with all the superficialness. His message for sure can get lost in that.
Umm Tony you have my upmost respect. You’re being realistic and as much as I want the soft life and a man that’s willing to assist in such, I do not have to be delusional in my attempt to do so. Thanks for touching on colorism as well.
50/50?
😂😂😂
@thisisme2976 like huh? 50/50? Whats that? 🤣🤦🏾♀️
Men aren’t our slaves, they are supposed to be our leaders and the head of household- This is God’s order period. 50/50 isn’t in the Bible anywhere regarding marriages. What I am saying has nothing to do with a jezebel spirit either- I’m talking about emotionally healed God-fearing women because we may lay low but we do in fact exist.
If our husbands go through a Job season, that’s one thing. In that case, of course we are going to be there to be the extra support because of the season our marriage is in. But I’m going to have to draw that line in the sand with TG because if we’re going to bring up a Proverbs 31 woman, let’s talk about how she was able to be that kind of woman. Her husband was respected at the city gates. Clearly he was a model type husband if his wife was able to do so much -not only in their home but also outside of the home for the community. I doubt that he was requiring her to be a super wife- it was a glorious byproduct of a marriage and a household that was IN ORDER. We aren’t called to finish raising another woman’s grown son into being our husband. I’m happy that worked out well for TG and his wife but that doesn’t work out very well for the average woman.
In the garden, God didn’t make Eve first and then tell her to teach Adam how to see the vision for their life. That’s out of order. I expect you to know this and not make secular provisions for a depraved society. So are you trying to be a voice for the women in the body of Christ or women of the world who aren’t even thinking about God? I need to know.
P.S. I prefer not to be blocked- I actually enjoy your content. Just not this one so much.
Just a voice crying out in the wilderness saying make straight the way of the Lord🗣️
This was such a very real topic of discussion here! Great work!!! Many women dont realize that yes there are men that can pay 100% but they are not in abundance and/or they may be controlling or not generous. If they were in abundance, every woman would have one. I'm not advocating for 50/50, but what im saying is take each situation as it comes. Every relationship is unique. Make a choice that's going to work for you. Every woman is not going to have a man who can pay 100 or who will pay 100. That's just the truth.
I wish you would really support your wife just being qualified. Possibly…some of the qualities she showed (during the interview) were some of the same qualities shown when you picked her as a wife. Why would the hiring agent have to be prejudice to pick your wife over others. Were you prejudice in your pick of her or was she just the best choice for you. ❤
Tony u should be a comedian. You be cracking me up😂😂😂😂!!!
IKR?! 😂
Yesssss😂😂😂😂 BLooooocked
Ima have to disagree w you on this one tony
Ladies, unless we find another Tony Gaskins, I believe it not wise to put our financial fate in the hands of a MAN., or anyone for that matter. Find your gifts and talents, make money off of that, and enjoy your life as best as you can, because the man we desire may never show up. Keep pushing and praying ladies.
I speak from a peaceful heart, therefore am not triggered by Tony’s message. I endorse it 100% 🙌🙏🏻