My partner and I live together have a 3 yr old. We still talk all the time I recently started keeping a journal, writing all the ways I failed our family being a child. I started anxiety medication and adhd medication. I started therapy, gave up drinking, gave up sugar getting rid of all my impulsive behaviors. I exercise with a plan and eat with a plan. I remind myself she doesn’t love me she doesn’t want to be with me and she might never want to be back together. I am trying very hard to quiet my mind with unnecessary thoughts. I accept her social media posts might be about me not being there or about a toxic childhood. Giving space when living together is the hard part. We get a long really well, I am just waiting for that moment she comes to me with something emotional so I can listen and prove I am here for her. I am not sure what else to do. She told me she just had so much resentment and I know she told me over the years I just didn’t hear her.
I'm in the exact same situation, how long ago did she say she wants to split? It's been 14 weeks or so for me. She's starting to connect with me way more but it's testing hard. Today she said she would never allow herself to have those feelings with me again, I said "I'm sorry I made you feel that way and you have every right to feel like that"
@@Bringmejoycon Mine says same thing, she will never let herself fall for me again. Never never never. Makes no sense when all the problems that she left me for initially are not happening anymore, and she actively notices my changes that I have internalized. She's meanwhile obsessed with her ugly childhood friend.
@@Bringmejoycon I asked my partner if she would want to be together. She told me, how could I know if that’s going to happen. What I have seen so far that’s been helpful for my mental state. Therapy, or some kind of group, exercise diet…recently keeping s journal and telling myself this could be over. Write out all the things you might have to do when you split. I am trying to prepare myself for the end. In the meantime I am working hard on understanding myself.
@tb87670 you can still get her. But that probably feels upsetting, she's giving no hope to see if you'll give up or not. Don't be reactive, be 10x your old self. It's hard but the more you practice it the easier it becomes.
@alexandermoreno9087 that's what I've done, prapare yourself mentally for the end, and workout, I haven't missed a workout in 14 weeks and it helps my mental state a ton. Don't forget your a badass with value so carry yourself that way, no ego but just a person with value who anyone would be lucky to have.
here is what a found jeff, i think most people doesn't enjoy the process especially bettering themselves because of lacks of validation for the most, i'm also quite often victim of these mentality 😂 any thought on this one?
I like the idea of this program, however once someone leaves to date other people. I’m not coming back to that. I feel like you can improve yourself but still set personal boundaries.
My partner is very caring, kind and affectionate. Still talks to me every day. Shares about her life and day. And offers hugs when she sees I’m upset about the end of the relationship. She also says she sees and believes my changes but that her feelings are gone for good and will never come back. I live in the guest room. I don’t really know how to proceed. I wasn’t safe for her. I was critical, judgemental, and got angry easily. No clue what my next step is when it feels like she has convinced herself that her love for me is nothing but friendly. “I love you but I’m not in love with you.”
The answer is in the video, don’t give up. When they take away hope and you’re consistent they eventually change their minds. But then changing their mind you still have work to do. A lot more.
@@del_619 Ok. I just find it confusing how she actually says “you’ve been perfect in the last few months and I believe in your changes, but unfortunately my feelings haven’t come back. And they never will.” And I’m like, if I’ve done things right in her eyes, and she believes me, why is she jumping off instead of continuing to work on things? (And yes I’m aware I was better but things still weren’t good.)
@@InfinitevanityIts just part of her 'tests', i understand its hard hard but keep focus on your growth brother not the outcome, if she is comeback good, if not it is good as well since you have become better than you used to.
Man I'm going through the same thing right now and it has been almost a year but with 2 months of Geoffrey videos I have seen big difference and we are talking more and things went from never going to happen but action starting to show different head up bro
@@harleysparks5034 We still live together for now, but I'm in the spare room now. She's still very friendly and caring. But she's determined to live her life now. (I was very controlling unfortunately due to my own insecurities. And she's an avoidant so she's never put up her boundaries and I didn't notice how bad I was.) She's revamped the bedroom, is constantly out, buys new stuff, changed all her habits. Her friends are saying she's definitely done for good. I don't want to give up and am trying to re-build an emotional connection.
Me and my partner are having a bad time and she says i need to show visible change to keep her. How do i show her that I've changed without telling her directly?
Sounds like you really gotta make a list of what you need to actually change and it change it. I hope y’all make it 🤞🏽I’m a lot farther than you and you’re closer than me. Keep going 😊
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My partner and I live together have a 3 yr old. We still talk all the time I recently started keeping a journal, writing all the ways I failed our family being a child. I started anxiety medication and adhd medication. I started therapy, gave up drinking, gave up sugar getting rid of all my impulsive behaviors. I exercise with a plan and eat with a plan. I remind myself she doesn’t love me she doesn’t want to be with me and she might never want to be back together. I am trying very hard to quiet my mind with unnecessary thoughts. I accept her social media posts might be about me not being there or about a toxic childhood. Giving space when living together is the hard part. We get a long really well, I am just waiting for that moment she comes to me with something emotional so I can listen and prove I am here for her. I am not sure what else to do. She told me she just had so much resentment and I know she told me over the years I just didn’t hear her.
I'm in the exact same situation, how long ago did she say she wants to split? It's been 14 weeks or so for me. She's starting to connect with me way more but it's testing hard. Today she said she would never allow herself to have those feelings with me again, I said "I'm sorry I made you feel that way and you have every right to feel like that"
@@Bringmejoycon Mine says same thing, she will never let herself fall for me again. Never never never. Makes no sense when all the problems that she left me for initially are not happening anymore, and she actively notices my changes that I have internalized. She's meanwhile obsessed with her ugly childhood friend.
@@Bringmejoycon I asked my partner if she would want to be together. She told me, how could I know if that’s going to happen. What I have seen so far that’s been helpful for my mental state. Therapy, or some kind of group, exercise diet…recently keeping s journal and telling myself this could be over. Write out all the things you might have to do when you split. I am trying to prepare myself for the end. In the meantime I am working hard on understanding myself.
@tb87670 you can still get her. But that probably feels upsetting, she's giving no hope to see if you'll give up or not. Don't be reactive, be 10x your old self. It's hard but the more you practice it the easier it becomes.
@alexandermoreno9087 that's what I've done, prapare yourself mentally for the end, and workout, I haven't missed a workout in 14 weeks and it helps my mental state a ton. Don't forget your a badass with value so carry yourself that way, no ego but just a person with value who anyone would be lucky to have.
here is what a found jeff, i think most people doesn't enjoy the process especially bettering themselves because of lacks of validation for the most, i'm also quite often victim of these mentality 😂
any thought on this one?
I like the idea of this program, however once someone leaves to date other people. I’m not coming back to that. I feel like you can improve yourself but still set personal boundaries.
My partner is very caring, kind and affectionate. Still talks to me every day. Shares about her life and day. And offers hugs when she sees I’m upset about the end of the relationship.
She also says she sees and believes my changes but that her feelings are gone for good and will never come back.
I live in the guest room. I don’t really know how to proceed. I wasn’t safe for her. I was critical, judgemental, and got angry easily. No clue what my next step is when it feels like she has convinced herself that her love for me is nothing but friendly. “I love you but I’m not in love with you.”
The answer is in the video, don’t give up. When they take away hope and you’re consistent they eventually change their minds. But then changing their mind you still have work to do. A lot more.
@@del_619 Ok. I just find it confusing how she actually says “you’ve been perfect in the last few months and I believe in your changes, but unfortunately my feelings haven’t come back. And they never will.” And I’m like, if I’ve done things right in her eyes, and she believes me, why is she jumping off instead of continuing to work on things? (And yes I’m aware I was better but things still weren’t good.)
@@InfinitevanityIts just part of her 'tests', i understand its hard hard but keep focus on your growth brother not the outcome, if she is comeback good, if not it is good as well since you have become better than you used to.
Man I'm going through the same thing right now and it has been almost a year but with 2 months of Geoffrey videos I have seen big difference and we are talking more and things went from never going to happen but action starting to show different head up bro
@@harleysparks5034 We still live together for now, but I'm in the spare room now. She's still very friendly and caring. But she's determined to live her life now. (I was very controlling unfortunately due to my own insecurities. And she's an avoidant so she's never put up her boundaries and I didn't notice how bad I was.) She's revamped the bedroom, is constantly out, buys new stuff, changed all her habits. Her friends are saying she's definitely done for good. I don't want to give up and am trying to re-build an emotional connection.
Great content 🎉🎉
Me and my partner are having a bad time and she says i need to show visible change to keep her. How do i show her that I've changed without telling her directly?
Sounds like you really gotta make a list of what you need to actually change and it change it. I hope y’all make it 🤞🏽I’m a lot farther than you and you’re closer than me. Keep going 😊
Nice video
Hes like Andrew Tate for simps…
Andrew Tate is married or has a stable long-term relationship?
it’s quite sad you cannot see the value in these videos
I hope you can see past your brain fog some day.