Have a phoneback appointment for legal advise. It can only be done this way. I can be called back Monday/Fri all day... "within 10 business days". The anxiety is real...
Dang! If its legal i would honestly have somone else with me to keep me on point ...I cant cope with the robot people who arent human you know those guys..like its just theur job but they repeat a script that makes no sense and its impossible to get them to think logically and then they get offended like its their ego when its just a problem to be solved. Sigh. So i bring a person with me for those because otherwise i will end up in tears.
I also find it difficult because my auditory processing is terrible and I need to lip read to understand what someone is saying quite a lot of the time!
I am the complete opposite. I love not having to make eye contact or focus on the other person. I hate talking to people about subjects I'd rather avoid though.
Growing up, whenever the phone rang, I ran and hid. Not till diagnosed with ASD at age 69 did I understand why calling or receiving calls from almost anyone triggers a flight reaction . . . even when I need to ask for help. Rather inconvenient! Facetime and Zoom also freak me out.
❤ yes. I am the same. But i wonder why zoom bothers me too? Could be my slow auditory processing. I need closed captions on zoom calls otherwise i miss what people have said.
This really helped explain to me why i struggle so much with phone calls, thank you. I always knew it was something but i didnt know exactly what things were the reasons i was struggling
I speak several languages and in one of my second languages it's like this. I find it much harder to chat on the phone in a second language whereas face to face it's much easier. In English - my mother tongue it's much easier. So I kind of understand this.
I have auditory processing problems with phones and electronics. Its either too loud to make out words or too quiet to hear, and theres NEVER an in-between in phonecalls. I wish everyone came with accurate subtitles.
Oh, yes, yup, that’s right. When I can see their face I can answer how they want me to. Since life isn’t about being right, it’s about conforming to the norm. 😢❤
I hate phone calls, and I hadn’t thought about visual cues - but you’re right, that’s a big part of it. There’s also something about the lack of any visual at all. This seems weird, since looking at people and listening at the same time is hard, so I tend to look away when talking in person. Maybe it’s that I maintain an awareness of their location in space, which is missing on the phone.
I don't like phone calls for these reasons too but video calls are worse because I am distracted by my own image and by anxiety about how I am coming across. On the phone I'm able to just say what I need to say much more clearly and assertively because I can't see the other person's face and be intimidated by trying to second guess how it's all landing with them.
I find phone calls easier because I don't have to worry about non verbal cues. I would think any one way form of communication eg only reading body language, only writing, only speak would make communication less overwhelming. I always prefer phone calls over all communication because it is fast and only have words to worry about. People have to be explicit. Also nearly all people prefer texting over phone calls. I like phone calls because I can ask immediately if I am worried i am misunderstanding.
I wonder if this is why I misunderstand textual conversations. It's like I'm missing the subtleties that people expect me to read in between the lines. Someone recently asked me if I even know how to read...
I just have a fear of speaking to people I don’t know on the phone.. if I absolutely have to call for a drs or dentist or maybe the bank , I have to psych myself up around 3 days before.. absolutely ridiculous.. I was ok until I turned 16… I am now 40 and no one thing has changed lol .
Same but I'm 22. I recently had to have my mum sit with me just to call the bank. It's so frustrating! I won't pick up calls unless the person is in my contacts or it's a scheduled appointment.
Purple Ella I’m not sure if this would work with your set up but wondering if you could get a boom mic or (probably less ideal) lapel mic? I’m not sure what your mic set-up is at the moment but even if you brought it closer. Would 100% not mind seeing the microphone on screen if it protects your voice a little more. It just feels a bit uncomfortable sometimes that I think you might be over extending/speaking louder than your voice is comfortable with? Or another suggestion would be to check in with a voice coach about breathwork and projection? Love seeing your content and how channel is growing. You’re realer than real to me having tuned in for exactly 7 years since I was pregnant with my son. Oops messed up edit. Meant to also say I have no expertise so ignore if irrelevant and keep doing what you’re doing.
I get tripped up on the seeing when people are done talking thing. My mom does that a lot without actually being done talking, like by all means it seems like she is, but she isn't. Edit: Also i called the doctor to get an appointment. The lady taking my appointment straight up asked me why i was laughing. I said i was nervous and she said "why?" That literally made me refuse to call there again.
Okay, I'm confused! I do share the same difficulties and I feel very seen. But I always thought that autistic people tend to NOT get the non verbal cues (obviously dependig on the individual since it is a spectrum but generally speaking). So I thought me relying on non verbal cues - and therefore hating phone calls - would be an argument against me being autistic. But in reality you are supposed to "read" solely out of someones voice??
Have a phoneback appointment for legal advise. It can only be done this way. I can be called back Monday/Fri all day... "within 10 business days". The anxiety is real...
Dang! If its legal i would honestly have somone else with me to keep me on point ...I cant cope with the robot people who arent human you know those guys..like its just theur job but they repeat a script that makes no sense and its impossible to get them to think logically and then they get offended like its their ego when its just a problem to be solved. Sigh. So i bring a person with me for those because otherwise i will end up in tears.
I also find it difficult because my auditory processing is terrible and I need to lip read to understand what someone is saying quite a lot of the time!
This!
❤ yes my auditory processing makes me need to use closed captions on videos. I need cc for phone calls!!
Yes! I found it so hard when people had to wear face masks because I couldn't read their lips❤
The main phone calls I take are for appointments.
I am the complete opposite. I love not having to make eye contact or focus on the other person. I hate talking to people about subjects I'd rather avoid though.
This is spot on for me too. Here I am reading all of these polar opposite feelings to own and them BAM! a your comment is similar to me.
Okay, I feel less dumb after watching this. Thank you ❤️
Growing up, whenever the phone rang, I ran and hid. Not till diagnosed with ASD at age 69 did I understand why calling or receiving calls from almost anyone triggers a flight reaction . . . even when I need to ask for help. Rather inconvenient! Facetime and Zoom also freak me out.
❤ yes. I am the same. But i wonder why zoom bothers me too? Could be my slow auditory processing. I need closed captions on zoom calls otherwise i miss what people have said.
So much this. I can't see any cues when on the phone, and it's terrifying. So much harder to communicate, and my communication is bad as it is. 😅
This really helped explain to me why i struggle so much with phone calls, thank you.
I always knew it was something but i didnt know exactly what things were the reasons i was struggling
I speak several languages and in one of my second languages it's like this. I find it much harder to chat on the phone in a second language whereas face to face it's much easier. In English - my mother tongue it's much easier. So I kind of understand this.
I have auditory processing problems with phones and electronics. Its either too loud to make out words or too quiet to hear, and theres NEVER an in-between in phonecalls. I wish everyone came with accurate subtitles.
❤same. I need closed captions.
Oh, yes, yup, that’s right.
When I can see their face I can answer how they want me to. Since life isn’t about being right, it’s about conforming to the norm.
😢❤
I really get what you're saying, i tend to video chat it's easier for me to pick up on the visual quese.❤
I hate phone calls, and I hadn’t thought about visual cues - but you’re right, that’s a big part of it. There’s also something about the lack of any visual at all. This seems weird, since looking at people and listening at the same time is hard, so I tend to look away when talking in person. Maybe it’s that I maintain an awareness of their location in space, which is missing on the phone.
I don't talk on the phone lol but when I do, I draw so I can listen. It's a mask I picked up in the 80's when you couldn't see the person's face.
I had a phone appointment with a nurse, we were talking over each other 80% of the time.
I don't like phone calls for these reasons too but video calls are worse because I am distracted by my own image and by anxiety about how I am coming across. On the phone I'm able to just say what I need to say much more clearly and assertively because I can't see the other person's face and be intimidated by trying to second guess how it's all landing with them.
❤ wonderfully explained and i related.
Thank you for explaining my fear of phone calls. I have had avoidance towards making phone calls all of my life and you explained why so well♥️
I am terrified of and hate phone calls. I misunderstand a lot and don’t remember what I want to say. I need to write everything down beforehand.
I find phone calls easier because I don't have to worry about non verbal cues. I would think any one way form of communication eg only reading body language, only writing, only speak would make communication less overwhelming. I always prefer phone calls over all communication because it is fast and only have words to worry about. People have to be explicit. Also nearly all people prefer texting over phone calls. I like phone calls because I can ask immediately if I am worried i am misunderstanding.
I like phone calls better than texting most of the time.
I wonder if this is why I misunderstand textual conversations. It's like I'm missing the subtleties that people expect me to read in between the lines. Someone recently asked me if I even know how to read...
Yeah, my son FaceTimes me instead of calling. But he sometimes texts.
Well the full face covering as work by Muslim women would be impossible for someone with Autism
❤thats a great point.
Depends on the person. Different people have different sensitivities.
Not necessarily. It depends on the person.
I just have a fear of speaking to people I don’t know on the phone.. if I absolutely have to call for a drs or dentist or maybe the bank , I have to psych myself up around 3 days before.. absolutely ridiculous.. I was ok until I turned 16… I am now 40 and no one thing has changed lol .
Same but I'm 22. I recently had to have my mum sit with me just to call the bank. It's so frustrating! I won't pick up calls unless the person is in my contacts or it's a scheduled appointment.
Yep!
For some reason I interrupt more in person. I think that I am reading the non-verbal cues wrong.
I just went "screw body language and tone of voice, if I don't understand what they said its on them"
Purple Ella I’m not sure if this would work with your set up but wondering if you could get a boom mic or (probably less ideal) lapel mic? I’m not sure what your mic set-up is at the moment but even if you brought it closer. Would 100% not mind seeing the microphone on screen if it protects your voice a little more. It just feels a bit uncomfortable sometimes that I think you might be over extending/speaking louder than your voice is comfortable with? Or another suggestion would be to check in with a voice coach about breathwork and projection? Love seeing your content and how channel is growing. You’re realer than real to me having tuned in for exactly 7 years since I was pregnant with my son. Oops messed up edit. Meant to also say I have no expertise so ignore if irrelevant and keep doing what you’re doing.
Im like this more so with texting
I avoid all calls
I have a tendency to need to finish what I'm saying even if the other person has got it already.... leading to overexplanation....
I get tripped up on the seeing when people are done talking thing.
My mom does that a lot without actually being done talking, like by all means it seems like she is, but she isn't.
Edit: Also i called the doctor to get an appointment. The lady taking my appointment straight up asked me why i was laughing. I said i was nervous and she said "why?" That literally made me refuse to call there again.
😯 laughing conveys humor or a joke.
@@orangeziggy348 I chuckle when I get nervous, and this was the first time someone straight up asked me about it.
Edit: it caught me off guard.
@@meng_janI have laughed because of anxiety. Also, I would tell that woman that the doctor's office causes many people anxiety.
Haha that's me 😂
Okay, I'm confused! I do share the same difficulties and I feel very seen. But I always thought that autistic people tend to NOT get the non verbal cues (obviously dependig on the individual since it is a spectrum but generally speaking). So I thought me relying on non verbal cues - and therefore hating phone calls - would be an argument against me being autistic. But in reality you are supposed to "read" solely out of someones voice??
100%
You're not autistic.