Evan Rachel Wood on Surviving an Abusive Relationship | Body Stories | SELF
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- Опубликовано: 29 окт 2019
- Actress and activist Evan Rachel Wood sits down with us to describe her experiences surviving domestic abuse, as well as accepting her bust size and discovering her sexuality.
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Evan Rachel Wood on Surviving an Abusive Relationship | Body Stories | SELF
“Being strong with a complicated person” literally sums up what I truly thought I was being. Only once I got out I saw how truly abusive it was at every turn.
And the thing is, that's how they sell themselves. They're just "complicated" and they present it as a privilege to know them, to get within their circle.
@@carlycrays2831 Isn't it surreal? I thought I was special for a long time and that build up of lovebombing and constant manipulation made the realization of it how I truly meant nothing -- it was a harsh lesson to learn. I survived him though and I'm thriving!
@@cassandralyne And you are something! You are special! But these people are so good at making you not believe that
I'll never understand what kind of pleasure drives a human being to make others suffer. In the end if you were able to get out of it, you are a heck of a lot stronger than you realize.
Same here 💕
"I was given the perfect body for who I am." wow
Angel K empowering.
She is FOS. She doesn't speak up for women........if she did, she would have condemned ALL THOSE WHITE MEN IN HOLLYWOOD! But she didn't.......she spoke on R Kelly and Bill Cosby! Smh
@@daddyfamlittle6262 ya cause she wants that job on westworld haha
@@daddyfamlittle6262 Are you hearing something we're not? she's speaking about and for herself here.
@@daddyfamlittle6262 so her testifying in front of Congress to pass a great bill against abusive men wasn't enough?
She did it, y’all. She named him.
Indeed she did
Good for her!
It broke my heart when she said I want to name him but I can't. Well girl went and did it!!
@@thatbitchfrom417 yes! Like, if this Evan Rachel could see herself today...❤️
She is so brave 👍👏
My daughter went through exactly the relationship Evan did. Her watching Ms Woods testifying before the senate gave my daughter strength to move on. I'll always owe Evan a huge huge debt of gratitude for her courage and strength. She helped save my baby. Thank you, Evan, I'm a fan forever.
That's really nice to hear. I really hope your daughter is fine and well!
Amazing sentiment. Wish all the best to you and your family.
She allowed it to happen, that does not in any way make her a victim. These terms are too loosely thrown around, and the females are NOT taking responsibility for their actions taking part.
I have been in an abusive relationship to all degrees; when I realized that the only way for it to stop was to walk away- I knew it was my fault. I took responsibility in stopping what could've been prevented if I didnt allow it to happen.
@@AmandaDixson Wow. Is there a kind and non-confrontational way to tell someone they need therapy? Please educate yourself about domestic violence. On average victims leave 7 times before they leave for good- if they survive that long. Your comment makes me sad for you.
Your a great supportive Dad. That means a lot to her.
My boyfriend when I was 21-22 nearly killed me. He gaslit me until I was literally trapped in our apartment 24/7 and brainwashed to the point where I blamed myself for what was happening and couldn’t talk to anyone on the outside. Our roommates were part of conditioning me and blamed me for what was happening. If he hadn’t left me I would have died, without a doubt (he stabbed the girl he left me for). It took me forever to break that conditioning, I didn’t want to be here and fell deeply into addiction to escape the trauma. I had to have a really safe space to sober up and process that trauma in therapy- it took me YEARS. Thank you, Evan, for your bravery in sharing your story. It’s so hard to believe something like that can happen to you until it does.
ana I'm so sorry that happened to you, that is so not right and not fair. I'm really glad you got out ❤️
You should be so proud of yourself. I was in a mentally and verbally abusive relationship for over 6 years and people just think it's so easy to leave. It's absolutely not. Totally understand what you've been through. I now have the most amazing man who treats me like I've never been treated before.
Sally Morris you’re so right and I hope you are too! I’m married now to a really amazing and kind person who knows about my past , who supports me and believes the best in me, who I feel safe with. I’m glad you could find the same happiness. Rock on, you warrior ❤️
Woman, children tend to blame themselves :( :(
So glad you’re safe now sister
People saying that she didnt seem like the victim when she was with MM . I was married to the a guy who was pretty verbally, and emotional abusive who I protected a lot in public. For many years I did it. I stood up for and made excuses for a lot of it.. Even my closest friends and family didn't know how he was until our marriage ended. I would know it was wrong because it hurt me, but I felt that was just as good as I was going to get and it was up to me to make it a better marriage.. It wasn't until many many months after I got out that I began to see how damaging being with him was to my whole being--and even more years to get the healing process down. Unless you have been in that type of situation, you just don't know. I even remember telling a therapist (after they asked me "are you sure this is healthy for you to stay with?") that it was ok, that I loved him, and that it was what I wanted. Covert narcissists are around everywhere and they're a very dangerous breed of person.
I’m sorry you had to endure any of that. Hope you’re doing fantastic :)
You sound like one
Non-disclosure agreements shouldn't matter in cases like this.
they don't
They do if you are in a CONSENSUAL BDSM lifestyle relationship. All the women getting with him, know he is like this and is fully aware of what the conditions are.
@@AmandaDixson bdsm still has rules and I don't think manipulating someone into it is considered consensual
@@AmandaDixson no one consents to abuse. Stop conflating bdsm with abuse.
@@Glaiket probably one of the people who’s read 50 shades of suck and thought it was 10/10 romance goals
People complaining about her talking about herself in a channel called self... Are you ok?
So funny
🤣🤣
Exaclty lol
I also was actually going to comment about the "me me me, I I I, my my my" thing until I realized that the channel's called Self, indeed. Nevertheless, I like a "me and others" approach. I wished she'd talk about not just how she learned to appreciate her body and strength but also how she uses those to interact and help others and her community. Maybe that's a next step.
There IS a period where everything is fine. You Are Groomed. This is so critical to know- it can happen to anyone
And when the mask slips ... ubelievable! You're absolutely right, it can happen to the most intelligent, sophisicated people on this planet.
Really... anyone. Im in a position now where too much is invested to walk. Years in and then it starts in many cases. Im just thinking im old! How am i supposed to leave it all behind and start again, again?!
@@miguelmarquez4192 sometimes cutting the losses is the gain. You've gained much in lessons and how to treat people. Cutting your losses is not a failure not does it make those years be in vain.
Yes
@@miguelmarquez4192 Do the right thing. The rest will tend to itself.
"I've actually been given the perfect body for who I am." Such powerful words, if we could all just internalize them for ourselves.
“I’ve actually been given a perfect body for who I am”. This right here is precious 🙌
" i didnt realize that i was being abused i thought that i was being strong with a complicated person"
hit me hard.
Because it is not real. It is her hoax
@@tracymarrow7841 What?
My first experience of being in a abusive relationship was with my mother. Never stay in an abusive relationship with someone let go and heal yourself celebrate your small victories everyday!💕
I feel that. And ignore people who don't understand how some women are toxic and not cut out to be mothers with their "but she's your mom, moms are difficult sometimes, I'm sure she loves you" crap.
same. same, same, same. i've never met anyone else say this so thank you so much for saying it. i'm literally almost in tears just because i feel like there is someone on this planet who genuinely understands what i went through and survived. i still bear the emotional scars and am actively working to heal them via holistic therapy, art, meditation, etc. it's so silly but i'm so blessed to have read your comment. stay well, friend xx
@@k_a_y_l_e_e same here, decades later and I'm still trying to heal. I wish you all the luck and strength in the world. You're not alone
@@MsZephyra exactly -- I hate the bs " but she is your mother " spiel . When someone tries to kill me at only 7 years old , it does not matter who they are !!
much love you strong lady
I can’t believe she is sitting like that on that stool and not falling over
I would’ve face planted immediately
Not to take this lightly, but I enjoy suddenly laughing out loud
Or even being comfortable
bc she's a machine
@@yw1971 A robotoid?
lol. it's a bisexual thing
"I didn't think I was being abused, I thought I was being strong with a complicated person"
Exactly how I felt when I was in a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship. The thing the media and Hollywood gets wrong about portraying abuse is that not all survivors are I inherently soft-spoken and subservient.
You can still be a survivor of abuse but be boldly confrontational throughout said abuse - it's just that, after all the gaslighting you start to get exhausted trying to defend yourself and start to doubt your own intuition.
I remember when I first saw her. It was when she started dating him and everyone was talking about it and about the age difference between them. To me, she looked like some sort of impossibly flawless porcelain doll, and having him by her side only accentuated that. I felt there was something off about them, but didn't know what it was (I was just a kid, a few years younger than her). Now I look at her talking and laughing and I can see an actual human being. I don't even want to imagine what she must have gone through. He obviously saw her as his own little doll, that's for sure.
I was around 15-16 years old when I watched Evan Rachel Wood in the movie Thirteen. One of my all time favorites, as it was scarily relatable to my own turbulent upbringing I had as a young teen. I remember being entranced by the maturity she depicted at such an age and her ability to bring a realness to the screen that I had never witnessed before. It brings me much joy to see that Hollywood didn’t ruin her the way it has so many others. She is an old, wise soul through and through, and we definitely need more of her wisdom shining upon these younger generations who look up to the Kardashians as role models...🙄
Thank you Evan for sharing this interview! You are a beautiful soul. 🤍
I first saw her in Westworld just a few weeks before turning 15.
shes also a racist
@Tara Von yeah that film was actually very cool, I completely forgot I watched it!
Right. Because Kourtney doesn't promote being eco-friendly, Kim isn't getting people out of prison and Khloe isn't showing us how not to get involved with a cheater. Geez, what horrible humans.
Tip: you don't have to dim their light to make Evans shine brighter.
I agree 100%.
Some people in the comments seem triggered by this beautiful display of authenticity. They see it as an act, and their lack of tact and straight up meanness expressed in their comments remind me of abusive exes of mine. Abusive people can't comprehend or accept when people are truly being themselves because abusive people subconsciously hate themselves, and that's why beautiful people like her get abused. It's sad, but abusers provide a sometimes necessary challenge in this twisted reality to face and overcome. We learn to love ourselves more with even greater conviction. People love to hate love, and to those people I say - go ahead and eat your heart out.
Libby Knight amen sister!!!!
Well, reading what constitutes domestic abuse, that term could imply nearly anything, depending on the person's perception compared to the actual reality of events.
Well said.
@Laura R Barrow
I know men are abused often, but the difference is how society interprets abuse. Men being abusive and how women are the victims of that abuse is often what society pays attention to because, in reality, men's problems don't matter.
#CHURCH
Wow, I started crying when I listened to her speak about overcoming her body shame. When I was younger I was super skinny and I hated myself. Now I'm heavy and I hate myself. I buy all the clothes and shoes and makeup, anything to make myself feel good for a minute, until I really look in the mirror. I am 45 years old and have spent a lifetime hating my body. I hope i find the courage to accept myself before I die.
So do I Dana. You ARE beautiful.
You are beautiful no matter what you look like!!!
@@Shaun.Stephens thank you so very much
@@nicolelazaro3233 it's true and I sometimes forget. Thank you for reminding me
She’s been my woman crush forever. She’s incredible at her craft, and she seems to be a great normal, emotionally mature and likable person. Ugh. Sweep me away, Evan.
Her life has balance now like her stool game.
WORD 😎✌🏼
Yes Beavis. Exactly
This was before Kobe of course
Mad!!! I love her!
Lol this comment...epic
As a bisexual man who was part of a toxic relationship (and a HUGE fan of Westworld) I never thought I could relate so much to Evan Rachel Wood. She brought language to feelings I couldn't begin to describe myself. I'm so thankful for this video. ❤
Yes i had no idea she has been in an abusive relationship--her role as Dolores is so perfect and was so meaningful to me as a victim of abuse
I’m also Bi man can relate with you and Rachel finally have someone can relate with someone or people like me give you props being open and vulnerable. if you need a friend I’m here for you.
Your biggest icon was amber, that means something to me. But well, we are going to see in the future
She’s naturally beautiful. I’m glad she finally named her abuser.
proud of her. she's amazing
She's lying
@Ana Paula Where is yours?
@Miss Steele you don't need evidence for innocents...were all born into it.
@@kimberlee5985 there is enough proof for his abuse. I always had a negative feeling about him and he is a awful human. He abused her and even admit some of it. In interviews and song. The people who red his book they say the language he uses was disgusting. She is so brave for speaking out
Never EVER understood why the women gets blamed for being in a relationship with an “abuser”.
It’s a scary and lonely place to be, and that’s the reality.
The more people you tell, the better off you’ll be. Widen your support system, an abusers goal is to remove your support system and get you alone - tell as many people as you can.
MG1995 most domestic violence’s homicides though are women killed by men
MG1995 I’d like to see facts and figures on that.
“The justice system blames men EVERY time” is not true at all.
@@tamna5044 This "whole video" is specific to people who've suffered domestic abuse. The fact that you've equated that to women proves exactly what's wrong with society.
Ironic that you're now asking for citations, when only 2 seconds ago you were more than happy to assume men are always/ mostly the ones initiating violence, and that this is somehow a female issue.
According to the report: "Differences in Frequency of Violence and Reported Injury Between Relationships with Reciprocal and Nonreciprocal Intimate Partner Violence", women are the initiators of non-reciprocal domestic violence over 70% of the time.
Despite this fact, women are arrested for DV only 15% of the time, with cops automatically arresting men more often than not, even when THEY were the ones calling the authorities out of fear for their personal wellbeing.
@@MoviezGames Thanks, MRA, but derailing the conversation about domestic violence against women is not going to win you any brownie points. There are plenty of other places to discuss domestic violence against men. Go to one of those places. Bye.
MG1995
Millennia of misogyny is not healed, let alone reversed in a century.
I know you may feel left out or ignored if another groups pain and suffering is being discussed. That does not in any way invalidate your own concerns. However, trying to downplay legitimate and systematic oppression of women, a well documented phenomenon for millennia, is hardly the right path. You can validate another’s suffering and validate your own, as well.
She is an extremly mature person. This is something I can relate to..so many girls should see this.
She's already older
@@princessofnada87j25 she is 32. thats not "older". Thats an age most people are not even remotely that mature.
She’s always been mature
Not just women men too. I’ve had many male friends in abusive relationships and they have been raped by women.
Would it even help? Ppl are going to do what they want. Especially naive young girls.
She also wanted to name her abuser, so now she found the courage to do so and I commend her for being able to tell more of her story
😂
No one cares.
Marilyn Manson got blamed for everything since Columbine. Let's add this to the list of crap he didn't do
Seeing her this healthy, happy and beautiful on the in- and outside gives so much hope and power.
More women should voice their abusive relationship struggles, it gives not only insight but also hope to other women.
Not hard to do. I dont know any woman who have hard time expressing abuse...but whatever..
I agree, although I also understand and respect women who don’t feel comfortable or safe talking about their abuse, and they are also valid!
Yeah, women are too quiet.
They don’t go on and on and on and on enough.
@@mercyr6105 That's because those who have a hard time talking about it don't. Do you think it's possible you know them but don't know what they've been through?
@@nothanks8368 Unless you have been abused yourself it is hard to spot the signs.
This was a very important talk SELF, and can be applied all relationships, even in lgbtq+ ones. Thanks for sharing your story Evan Rachel Wood, and great job SELF in featuring this!
I just saw Dolores on the thumbnail but now I see Evan. Thanks for this interview!
She is spot on! I’m so sorry that she went through this. I have been there.
Marilyn Manson has left the chat.
Is that who she's talking about??
@@meghanmonroe i was wondering if it might be him, i mean she was 19 when she started dating him, and we all know thats a naive and still fairly fragile age. Manson was also struggling with alcoholism at the time, he was in a dark place himself around that point.
@@meghanmonroe the timeline heavily aligns with everything she's said about the relationship
@Cosmic Hobo the timeline heavily aligns with everything she's said about the relationship, it's pretty easy to infer
Marilyn actually came out and said how he went crazy when she left and called her like 100+ times, wanted to smash her head in, kill her and all of this crazyyy stuff. If it’s not him she’s taking about id be very, very surprised.
“I’ve been given the perfect body for who I am” 💖
Thank you for the courage to speak out about being a domestic violence survivor. As a survivor myself, you described the abuse process perfectly in stages starting with vulnerability, lack of knowledge, conditioning, and the destruction/havoc it causes on victims. The more people are educated on the domestic violence, the stages of the abuse , the predators and their luring conditioning, the less victims there will be. It goes back to the more people know the better they are equipped to protect themselves. Survivors have to speak out to protect & equip future potential victims.
I love how she doesn’t mind being so open and honest
@banana snake elevator cake okay hater. Stay off videos of her since it bothers you so much.
She looks like when she wakes up in the morning she naturally smells like vanilla and coconut and her breath smells like eucalyptus
I've never agreed more with a comment.
Okay but how did you get that comment to be so accurate.
That's such a strange comment. Lol
That's weird af, but I would bet money that you're right lolll
WTH even is a eucalyptus?! 🤣
What a beautiful soul. She is real, strong and graceful.
Wow, I relate so hard, it takes time to see yourself as you were in the relationship and come to terms with the fact you actually were really abused and deal with that before being able to speak publicly and not feel all encompassing shame. I know I'm still struggling and can't bring myself to get physically close and intimate emotionally and physically with another man, I think I'm ok and as soon as I'm in a situation of being alone, I freeze up. I am on medication and need therapy to function because of it. I might not ever be able to have that again because of the domestic violence I suffered. So good on her for speaking out and being able to move forward with her life.
Wish you luck. Fall in love with taking care of yourself.
@@hello-vy5lb thankyou, every day I wake up now, I actually want to get involved in my life rather than just watch it go by. I appreciate your kind words. 💖
Your brain isn’t fully developed until 25 she was 19 when she met him 38
Wow i didnt know that.....i thought it matures earlier
It is, it's only the frontal lobe that isn't completely developed yet which has to do with expression and communication.
@@katinkaaa2951 well yeah but still
She could be easily influenced
@@dc9067 give me a break, lol! She was 18, not 12! 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
@@theSpiritofTamzin 18 year olds are kids
Rose McGowan and Evan Rachel Wood both spoke out against Manson as being abusive. or maybe it was just Rose. Or maybe it was Dita? Saying he was violent and angry, smash windows, etc.. and Evan never accused Manson directly but it seems like it was him. edit: omg you guys Evan just came out and said it for real.. I think I had made this up about Evan because it was obvious and I just had inferred it somehow.. but Dita and Rose said he wasn't so it seems like he preyed on less famous people.
@DarthYuYevon what makes them a specific type of person to think all men ate abusive? Because they spoke up?
What about Dita?
DarthYuYevon And all women ask for it according to abusers like you.
Chic Noir29 Dita has chosen to stay mum on the subject. She left Manson because he had taken up with Evan Rachel Wood, and had gone off the deep end with drugs. She quietly filed for divorce and didn’t ask for any financial support. Dita has also said that she and Manson are friends again. Dita has always been extremely humble and I’ve never heard her say anything bad about anyone. She seems very old school in terms of ‘If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything’. Dita’s Burlesque tours are extremely successful and she keeps getting more and more famous. Her ex’s who have treated her badly have fallen considerably.
Where did they say that?
I was blind at first. I have memory problems and that was used to gaslight me. She used my compassion and empathy to manipulate me. Threats to control me. Nobody believed me because she was a petite 4'10 woman and had this loud, confident energy whereas I was bigger, shy and introverted. All of who I am was chipped away bit by it. It's been three years I've been out and I'm still struggling to get back to me, I don't even know if I can ever get back to that person, but I'm working on loving myself again and learning who I am
Be the best you you can be
It doesn't matter how small or how tall someone is. Dictators are also only 1 person and they can control a whole country. What matters is whether or not someone has psychological chains. A small human is perfectly able to chain an elephant and make such a powerful animal believe it's powerless.
@@Pumpkin0_0 Oh definitely. It was other people that held this view. It's about the behaviour, not what they look like
Unfortunately the halo effect is all to real and women can be extremely abusive without any sort of discovery even with proof they can coast by unscathed.
You aren’t alone in this and you could join an online support group to at the very least stop feeling alone.
Well shoot, I wanted to link something but I think it’s got to be through national hotlines etc.
Philosophy Tube posted a video recently about his own experience in this regard. You are not alone, and I hope you find peace.
Based solely on the title, I didn't expect this to give me so much joy.
What a brilliant person!
So glad you lived to spread your light..
I was gaslit, textbook, by my ex girlfriend. It wasn’t until I heard the words, “but I said I’ll let you go camping with your friends.” it had nothing to do with me “depending” on her, except feeling emotionally wanted. Thank you, Evan, for being such a beautiful person.
God this interview was so inspiring, refreshing and it gives so much hope to people on so many levels whether you're struggling with your past, present situation or self worth. Thank you Evan Rachel Wood for sharing a piece of your soul with us, the viewers. Thank you, SELF. I'm teared up here. 💕👍😘😍🥰💜
@@joshuafalade4754 maybe if u weren't a creeper like that she wouldn't have been cheating.
Finally understanding your feelings about "unconventional" attractions when she was younger had to be a huge revelation and weight being lifted.
It's crazy to me how hear what she's been through. I'm astonished how she's able to talk about that topic now.
I'm blown away be her performance as an actress in Westworld, and watching this video makes me feel like there's such a parallel. The strength of her aura is likewise in the late development of her character who in the beginning only saw the beauty in the world but was left to experience horrible things and truths and ends up having such a powerful force in her personality as a result of all the tough things she had to endure.
She really is a fascinating person - and is able to act it out on stage.
She Named him as her Abuser today!!! So Proud of you Evan!!!! And Esme Bianco too! Thank them both for going to our Congress to get laws changed to help domestic violence Survivors
Bravery, she had to.. the weight of that broke her. I hope she gets justice.
You fn loser. She's an opportunist nothing more. Try getting a hobby. Jumping on bandwagons isn't going to get you anywhere in life. Pathetic!
@@heatherlacovara4601 yeah, people don't realize her and amber heard are literally friends just like manson and depp are!
@Ana Paula You really think she needs more money? They broke up in 2010 (as far as I'm aware); you really think she spent 11 years waiting to "lie" about abuse allegations when she could've come out about it at the time or soon after, when it was more relevant. It makes no sense that she would come out about her abuse and make this interview a year ago but then wait to actually name him if it was all for money - literally what would she have to gain? You're just trying to conjure excuses so you don't have to admit to yourself that your favourite "artist" is abusive - and it is really is no stretch of the imagination considering even just the image he portrays, his lyrics and the way he talks about things. In his own book he brags about assaulting his mother. At this point you're pulling the wool over your own eyes.
Jade C That wasn’t bragging.
Wow she’s such a beautiful soul. It’s also amazing how many celebrities are opening up about who they really are and their struggles. It makes all the misfits of the world, or anyone who has struggled feel more ok with being different. like she said, it removes shame. What kind of world would it be if everyone could embrace who they are, be real and authentic, vulnerable and different. I’m seeing this world opening up even in the midst of what seems to be in upwelling of ignorance and evil.
I'm so proud of Evan for sharing her story. So much respect for her!
Every bisexual growing up has that epiphany moment where they are like wait I'm allowed to like both?
Yes both, both is good. Lol
both is good meme XD
Uhm. No.
And this interview has made me absolutely LOVE her. What a real and honest talk. She is so articulate and relatable. Love every part of this talk. Favourite quote: "Oh, I've been given the perfect body for who I am."
And yes I totally googled her relationship with Marilyn Manson.
I’ve always admired her acting skills. I hope she is happy and has peace in her life.
Evan is one of most talented actresses out there. I admire her so much inside and out
I love her ❤️
The upside of anger is one of my most favorite movies. It has helped me over the years with my anger issues. Evan Rachel Wood is a great woman and has great talent.
Wow. I have never related to an interview as much as this one. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing your story. The power and control wheel should be taught in schools, also the cycle of violence.
Yes indeed because like she said, she didn't even realize she was being abused. I feel like this needs to be taught in junior high, highschool and college.
The name she isn't naming is Marilyn Manson. Just in case anyone was curious.
@D Hawkz Yes, it is.
@@AlishaArlene, how do you know?
Then I'm very ashamed I just went to his concert 😔
@@steven.events Marilyn Manson himself admitted his fantasy with murder and emotional manipulation through his own self-mutilation.
Marilyn Manson is who she is talking about. Google his video with her. Abuse is apparent in the name of "art".
She's such a beautiful person, she went through something really hard and came out trying to find peace and love towards herself after somebody made her feel chaos and shame.
What she said about pregnancy was so honest and beautiful. If you are a woman who doesn't want children this obviously doesn't apply to you, but yeah I do feel like childbirth (cesarean or vaginal) is an ultimate test. It really does push our bodies to the edge of what it really is to be a biological woman. And that's incredible. I know many women will want this experience and may not have it. I wish we could all have what we want, just not the way of the world.
I needed to hear this. I’ve always been told “your a such a smart girl” I excelled in college and academics, started a career a have immense passion for overcoming a traumatic and unstable childhood and during all this seemingly positive success I was dating someone who was slowly becoming more and more monstrous in their treatment of me. I eventually became a emotional punching bag daily for them to climb on top of and shove themselves inside me when feeling emasculated by society. I gave up autonomy in hopes that if I complied the mistreatment would stop, it did not. It only escalated until I was suicidal. This person was charming, said all the right things in public, making me afraid to reach out for help for fear no one would believe me and support me. Which did end up happening in some regard making me see how victim blaming is a common aspect of my families culture as Asian American with toxic gender values. But what was worse is this illusion people had created about my image as a strong independent woman made it impossible for people to see me as a victim taking away my ability to identify what was happening to me. I told myself “I’m not a victim, I’m not naive like other women who don’t know better” I’m disgusted that I thought this way at all. That thinking is what kept me trapped. Predators can look like anyone and so can victims. We have to end the silence, end the stigma, stop doubting and challenging brave survivors who courageously tell their stories. For my child and myself I needed to get free and get myself healed and whole again. But it was a fight, a fight that took help, help that I know not all people suffering silently in abusive partnerships have. If you are a survivor I encourage you to share you story. The personal is political and your voice matters so much. We can do better if we do it together.
I believe you, and I believe in you. You will heal and be free. Thank you for sharing your story, and I agree with you so much: the personal IS political. Sending love and courage.
Thank you
Thank you. This is beautiful. I cannot get enough of watching and being women who are coming into ourselves. This time is so special, and sad at the same time. It should never have taken so long for this.
You can’t under estimate gaslighting of a person overtime by multiple family members ,by spouses and by your partner in a relationship ...it can mess up otherwise strong people in a way that is hard to describe .
Yes!!!
This is so relatable to me. I thank you for your honest discussion!
Manson has actually abused several women over the course of his career. Evan just happens to be the most high profile women accusing him. Look up the actress who played Ros on game of thrones. Lots of other non famous women have come forward too.
Dita as well
And rose McGowan these women deserve to speak their truth. I think these ndas to cover up crimes should be illegal. It hurts us all to support these men over the truth.
He had a lot of mysterious deaths surround him and missing persons around him aswell.
Can someone post some links or point me in the direction to see these other supposed accusations towards Manson aside Evans? Evan is the only one ive heard making allegations. Rose has said in many interviews she split with Manson because of his drug (cocaine) problem. And Dita has never said a bad word about him. Also, i believe she defended him against Evans allegations. Granted, Evan hasn't named him but since everyone is accusing him i figured I'd ask.
Chani Atreides that’s just stupid and false. He’s not a murderer, but I don’t doubt he’s abusive because it’s obvious since he’s a drug addict
This is incredible sharing- Thank you Evan for your vulnerability & honesty.
This is wonderful. I love that she's so willing to be real and raw and share her story. I resonate with many things she said. 💜
You’re very brave! Thank you for sharing your story! I was abused for years! I feel more comfortable telling me story now! Rock on!
This is really inspirational interview 👏👏I loved how honest and raw Evan Rachel Wood was 👏♥️ I loved how happy and luminous she was about who she is right now ♥️👏😊
Maggie Miles yeah there is life after abuse and hapiness!
Andreas Leon Landgren I am sorry, but I do not understand your answer. Do you mean that there is life after abuse? Because yes, there is. What do you mean?
Maggie Miles that’s what he meant, one can survive abuse, and thrive and become happy afterwards
@@christinebuckingham8369 Of course! I didn't mean that she can't be happy after abuse or something like that. I meant that it's really lovely who she is now, that she is happy! A lot of people, abuse or not, cannot be this raw about themselves. The thing is she can. It shows that she is strong and brave.
This made me cry because I related so much to her here.
Sofia Aberdein thank you
@@LolitaDelRey3 sending love
This was so much more than the title implies. Great piece
I'm glad I found this interview
I remember her when she was a kid in the movie Practical Magic.
Shannon Werlitz-Vandiver what really
@@luzrodriguez1214 yes. She's even a year younger than me.
That s what i was thinking. I loooved that movie so much! 💙💙💙
Loved that movie as a kid!
I first saw her in Once and Again - she was fantastic! I wish I could watch the series all over again.
Lilian Tong I know! I wonder if it's even available?
Me too! I knew she we something special when I saw her on the at show!
It literally sounds like she is talking about my life. I have always LOVED her, but I love her even more now!!!
Nothing against ERW but "Listen and Investigate" is my new mantra .
On a side note she looks beautiful.
I've always lliked but I like her even more now. Such a genuine, wise and fun soul.
She is so sweet ❤️ a genuine person ❤️
Eloquent, strong, truthful!!! what a fantastic human.
That hit me in a really big way. Thank you.
Abusers/groomers tailor themselves to their victims to hook them in
Alexis M.V. That’s classic behavior.
Both she and Manson were child stars. That environment is full of abusers.
She groomed him just right for this abuse she is displaying.
Yep, you can see a good example of that behavior in Amber Heard when she started going after Johnny...
@Miss Steele not quite
have always thought her skin is just absolutely perfect
OMG! Such an inspiring interview!
Thank you very much, Evan Rachel! Especially, - for your activism!
I can't believe she was self-conscious about her body. She might be one of the most perfect-looking people I've ever seen.
This just popped up on my suggestions list... she seems lovely and very easy to listen to.
"Don't break my heart.. or I'll break your heart shaped glasses."
Queenofallmonkeys HAH... yeah.
Ya I'm sure it's him she's referring too.
Marilyn?
she"s not a good muse i love Mm his music but heart shape glasses it's not good song i hAte that song i wonder he wrote this song i don"t recognize him
Yuuuuuuuup
Awesome that she gave this interview ~ I can’t even begin to imagine the helplessness and powerlessness she felt for so long, simply because I happen to be born a man... I think something not talked about is the responsibility that men have in this.
I just love how happy Evan looks when she is talking about being comfortable with her body and sexuality, and how happy she looked when explaining her pregnancy. She’s so sweet. I pray that her and her family will always have happiness.
Who sits like that on a stool!? Power move!
power move in itself
Ariana grande 💗
I do, to keep my feet warm.
Gucci❤Mademoiselle yes!!!
Tina Venturini Ariana Grande ;)
This is so beautiful. Thank you for your courage.
Thank you for sharing this with us.
I'm glad you've gained some clarity around your past, Evan. That doesn't mean that what you consented to was unconsentual. You ran into the arms of someone wearing their crazy scars literally on their sleeve. You could not get more "I'm insane" than Marilyn Manson. YOU have to own why YOU sought comfort in that chaotic place. That's YOUR journey, and no amount of self-victimization or attempting to destroy a sick man's career will change that you were also sick and sought that person out.
That was extremely well written. What you said is on point. Thank you for sharing.
In my worst relationship it was two damaged people creating more damage and thinking somehow it was going to be ok. It was not. In no way was it ok. It haunts me to this day.
I needed to listen and Watch this now, like right now
Stay strong 💜 you are loved!
Me too :,)
God, I love her. I’ve been in the same room with her twice and she really seems like a genuinely kind person. 🧡 A great role model for young girls.
We should always endeavour to be the nicest version of ourselves
I could listen to her talk for hours
You go, girl!!! Really well explained. Thank you so much.
I stand with you, Evan ♥
Thanks for sharing. Can totally relate. Strong women put up with more as they feel they should be tough enough to hang in there. Guilt, shame and blame distorts your reality and becomes your own demise. Your genuine self is heard and shines through . Keep being you 😊🙏🏼xx