How to Stop Giving a F*ck What Others Think

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  • Опубликовано: 29 сен 2024
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Комментарии • 1,1 тыс.

  • @clarkkegley
    @clarkkegley  Год назад +250

    Had lots of questions about overcoming "people pleasing" and living a life true to yourself, not the one others expect from you. Here are some thoughts on how to stop caring what others think! Ready to change your life? It all starts with asking yourself the right questions. Get the 11 questions to change your life now (free gift for yt subs): www.clarkkegley.com/free-questions

    • @eccletic32
      @eccletic32 Год назад

      Ok Clark..lets be realistic here....not everybody LOOKS LIKE YOU! So now that were on that page people are judgmental assh..es! JS Do you know how much those cheek bones, that face, those teeth and that hair puts you ahead of everybody else just by looks alone!? You are aware of the society we live in and the expectations people have about LOOKS! So be honest with yourself and many of your viewer's/subscribers. people like me don't even get the opportunities people like you turn down daily. AND yes other people are looking at you and judging especially @ those gyms you mentioned. Projection my butt..I have multiple degrees in Psychology and Sociology so, I know people and there is a lot of stuff you missed. Love your vids don't get or take me wrong IJS people ARE judgmental AF . Just imagine yourself as fat. a different race. bald. with crappy teeth and lets just throw in gay to be certain. Now do you think people would even speak to someone who had/has the qualities/looks I just listed? EXACTLY. Just take a look @ anyone who is regular. poor, overweight, disabled, old, ect.

    • @sweatybeanz808
      @sweatybeanz808 Год назад

      Thanks man

    • @elizabethd.2398
      @elizabethd.2398 Год назад

      This is why Donald Trump is hated so much. He’s not part of the Washington Swamp - so they resent that and will do anything in their power to destroy him. On the other hand, because he’s authentic - people like me just love him!

    • @whatsnext3444
      @whatsnext3444 Год назад

      Thank you

    • @adriansmall9828
      @adriansmall9828 Год назад +1

      I need to listen to this video… I’m learning not giving a f*ck about everyone opinion and focusing on my happiness and self-assurance and awareness.

  • @MotivatingVision
    @MotivatingVision Год назад +853

    Yes, you. You're probably scrolling through the comments, like I am, reading all these motivational comments. If you are reading this at night, you should get some sleep, and don't stress about everything going on in the world, or what you are going through. Don't dwell on things from the past, don't stress on your future. Just live your life, because you only get one. Do whatever makes you happy, not what other people want from you. For me, I'm going to wake up tomorrow morning, get hit the gym, and cherish life for the amazing blessing that it is. I hope you do the same and have an amazing day as well!

    • @ichkonntemichjakratzenaber2028
      @ichkonntemichjakratzenaber2028 Год назад +7

      thank you :)

    • @margiel2180
      @margiel2180 Год назад +3

      I love you ..thank you ..I SHALL!!!

    • @MyneedsWordsIwannasaybutwont
      @MyneedsWordsIwannasaybutwont Год назад +6

      I actually needed this. Thanks

    • @YatoDrawing
      @YatoDrawing Год назад +6

      Thanks! I really needed this

    • @angt9367
      @angt9367 11 месяцев назад +4

      Life is a blessing indeed. When you don’t slave away 40+ hrs a week on a job you hate. When you have zero ability to “ hit the gym” because how damn exhausted and drained you are from assisting others. But yeah, it’s a positive comment you made there. Have a great day as well.

  • @SVGE31
    @SVGE31 4 месяца назад +2

    Staying quiet sums up me not caring about what others think.

  • @justinthematrix
    @justinthematrix Год назад +1

    I’m a bartender and I just say whatever comes to mind at all times and most people respect my honesty. every interaction is fresh and genuine.

  • @lizzyb2412
    @lizzyb2412 2 месяца назад

    Even when i think i don't care, I do , I love this so much.

  • @carpetsmell2523
    @carpetsmell2523 8 месяцев назад

    Thank you man.. this is a slap in the face i needed. Really. "Its not about you" These words resonated with the exact problem i have. Thanks again.

  • @frankgonzalez1631
    @frankgonzalez1631 Год назад

    I've been doing this for practically all my life... And trust me this man is telling the truth.... As a general contractor I tell others I'm not here to be liked I'm here to do a high quality integrity workmanship which is what I'm known for... ❤

  • @rickyrichreacts9667
    @rickyrichreacts9667 7 месяцев назад +1

    Oh yeah it’s so easy to just not think about what others are thinking about me all the time 🙄🙄 it’s way harder done than said. It just how my mind has worked all my life. It’s torment

  • @marylynn259
    @marylynn259 4 месяца назад +1

    I don't have a problem with others' opinions, but with them disrespecting me just because, I really don't care about opinions or judgement because I strive to be as I am, with high morals and enough self consciousness and self confidence. But - when someone isn't genuine and would like to put me down, I easily break due to injustice and because I'm stubborn. What to do?

  • @tomh3999
    @tomh3999 11 месяцев назад

    In my case, I have this feeling of being phony, that I "see trough" behaviour in a way that makes some aspects of it unnatural. To "be someone" is to act artificial. I don't know how to get rid of that mentality.

  • @loriawinfree478
    @loriawinfree478 Год назад +1

    Thanks for your videos

  • @OrganizationXIII
    @OrganizationXIII Год назад +1

    2:13
    Not caring what people think looks like Wednesday, Addams

  • @clueken13
    @clueken13 Год назад +1

    Outstanding!

  • @ashikkushwaha5064
    @ashikkushwaha5064 Год назад +1

    I needed some things like this 😢❤❤

  • @kasoncluff-sl5yj
    @kasoncluff-sl5yj 3 месяца назад

    Yo man this helped so much thnx

  • @Ark_angel-z8q
    @Ark_angel-z8q Год назад

    Thanks for the vid

  • @petemc5070
    @petemc5070 Год назад +2

    I think that could have been a decent alternative title to the Rudyard Kipling poem, 'If'
    If you can keep your head when all about you
    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
    If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
    But make allowance for their doubting too;
    If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
    Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
    Or, being hated, don’t give way to hating,
    And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;
    If you can dream-and not make dreams your master;
    If you can think-and not make thoughts your aim;
    If you can meet with triumph and disaster
    And treat those two impostors just the same;
    If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
    Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
    And stoop and build ’em up with wornout tools;
    If you can make one heap of all your winnings
    And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
    And lose, and start again at your beginnings
    And never breathe a word about your loss;
    If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
    To serve your turn long after they are gone,
    And so hold on when there is nothing in you
    Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on”;
    If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
    Or walk with kings-nor lose the common touch;
    If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
    If all men count with you, but none too much;
    If you can fill the unforgiving minute
    With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run-
    Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
    And-which is more-you’ll be a Man, my son!

    • @the-daydreamer
      @the-daydreamer Год назад

      Thank you for posting this. I liked it so much

  • @nadiasina5426
    @nadiasina5426 Год назад

    Okay but not caring is not the way of self respect to your own boundaries If you don’t care u literally don’t care about urself!!!!

  • @jennifer3551
    @jennifer3551 Год назад +1049

    Not caring what others think has helped me to not be taken advantage of. I can say NO without an explanation and don't care what their reaction will be

    • @vanessak7069
      @vanessak7069 Год назад +15

      Same. Love that for us.

    • @GARUDASAIKO
      @GARUDASAIKO Год назад +5

      Nice

    • @kennygo5053
      @kennygo5053 Год назад +6

      Cheers mate

    • @kd_ss
      @kd_ss Год назад +4

      good stuff queen

    • @marklouis1890
      @marklouis1890 Год назад +10

      ​@@vanessak7069 I'm pretty much at that point in my life where I can say no without any rhyme or reason or any explanation and be completely copesthetic. We don't really owe anybody an explanation depending on the circumstances

  • @xanoster
    @xanoster Год назад +857

    18 yr - worried what others think
    40 yr- I don't care
    60 yr - they never cared

    • @ia2819
      @ia2819 Год назад +7

      😅🤣 dido

    • @TonyTone1
      @TonyTone1 Год назад +8

      Spot on. It’s looks like this guys really cares what people think about him . No class sticking his middles finger in video, child behavior

    • @nicksmith4378
      @nicksmith4378 Год назад +10

      I'm 40 and I still care.

    • @nicksmith4378
      @nicksmith4378 Год назад +2

      @@Jcislord1860 Think about this. The very fact you bothered to type that you don't care shows you care.

    • @01trsmar
      @01trsmar Год назад +11

      Not 60 yet,but you're 100% right! They never did care!!!

  • @lostmypassword1
    @lostmypassword1 Год назад +1042

    I grew up with an abusive amount of judgment and criticism from my parents. They were nice to people face to face but brutal about them behind their backs. I thought everyone was like this growing up, so I shut down and put on a persona. The hard part is getting your parents, teachers, coaches critical voice out of your head.

    • @nancyromariz9181
      @nancyromariz9181 Год назад +81

      I have been living this way ro 29 years. almost hitting 30 and my parents critism still paralyzes me. i dont want to bame them i moved away from my whole family rasinging my autistic kid on my own and i try everyday but they live in my head

    • @Lola-ko4is
      @Lola-ko4is Год назад +11

      100%

    • @anthonysampayo9221
      @anthonysampayo9221 Год назад +28

      ​@@nancyromariz9181 The fact that you're here (this video) means you're progressing. These voices in you're head are transitory, they won't be there forever but ultimately that's up to you. I found it helpful not to fight them and instead to ask.. . Is it true? If so, there's work to do but if not, politely set them aside and keep rocking. Greeting from Jersey!

    • @jasminepark89yearsago20
      @jasminepark89yearsago20 Год назад +11

      I'm sorry for what happened to you remember that it wasn't your fault it's just people project their own internal struggles or had a bad day, to help you can reprogram your narrative and subconscious mind with affirmations while sleeping and mediation for 10 minutes before bed and right when waking up to have more control of the childhood self the talk to a positive one and to regain confidence, you've got this❤❤❤

    • @bkirstie
      @bkirstie Год назад +1

      mostly your own criticism.

  • @laurac86
    @laurac86 Год назад +155

    “You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do” is a quote that really changed my perspective in a life changing way

    • @BethFoster-qs5dj
      @BethFoster-qs5dj 10 месяцев назад

      Hello can I use one of your pictures as mural I’m currently on a project and you will be paid and credited for it 😇

    • @cryptodescribed
      @cryptodescribed 9 месяцев назад +1

      Same its literally a lifehack. Most people are too busy with their own shit

    • @kelsogirl562
      @kelsogirl562 9 месяцев назад

      Yes - there's something tucked away in the depths of my mind about something similar where you're worried about what someone thinks of you - saying something like "other people won't spend one minute of their day thinking about you because they're far too concerned with themselves" and I've found this to be true.

  • @ulie8009
    @ulie8009 Год назад +561

    Wow this is sent from heaven. A couple of hours ago I was upset because an anonymous review was left on my business profile that was very negative and unjust. I was trying my best to not let that one review affect me so I decided to take a shower and detach. As soon as I open up the RUclips app and your vid is right at the top. I got goosebumps but... OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH!!

    • @GabrielXDrums
      @GabrielXDrums Год назад +11

      It’s the algorithm

    • @dewaynenelsonl964
      @dewaynenelsonl964 Год назад

      i was thinking the same thing because lately i have been wanting to share the gospel on social media but i was scared about what other people think and i even prayed about it… a few scrolls in youtube and i find this God given video that is gonna help thousands of people with the same issue🫶

    • @DamonCassidy
      @DamonCassidy Год назад +4

      That’s awesome!

    • @bluedot2989
      @bluedot2989 Год назад +3

      Combination of algorithms and law of attractions

    • @aaronmatthew7280
      @aaronmatthew7280 Год назад +1

      Same happened to me ..

  • @M_Kru
    @M_Kru Год назад +441

    How to not care what other think... 1. Life a life that brings you joy with people who are genuine and enjoy the little things in life (gratitude attitude), 2. Limit social media, 3. Help others how and when you can. 4. Accept that nobody will ever be considered perfect in this world anyway and you can't be everyones cup of tea it's impossible. 5. Enjoy your existence.

    • @DonaldGerbino
      @DonaldGerbino Год назад +19

      I dont do social media ever

    • @natalievandenberg3845
      @natalievandenberg3845 Год назад +10

      Self respect

    • @jaybomb5638
      @jaybomb5638 Год назад +5

      @@DonaldGerbino your on RUclips

    • @Lyddiebits
      @Lyddiebits Год назад +4

      @DonaldGerbino welcome to RUclips, this is Social Media.

    • @nxbxxha_1764
      @nxbxxha_1764 Год назад +5

      We all care what people think of us, that's human nature and that's not a bad thing to make people have a good impression of us WTF, WHY are we trying to change our NATURE??? 💀 Everyone says they don't care until they're sobbing at 3 am, WE ALL FUCKING CARE! WE ALL GIVE A FUCK!

  • @janehitt646
    @janehitt646 Год назад +97

    My parents were ashamed of me. For who I am not what I did which was nothing. They took away my emotions I was not allowed to feel anything but gratitude and love for them, and self loathing. They can go to hell. At 71 I am learning to be me. I have had to cut ties with my family because my siblings side with the dead parents. I am happier now then at anytime in my life.

    • @hlengiwemasondo2858
      @hlengiwemasondo2858 Год назад +4

      Jane I'm so sorry. Where are u? I'm in South Africa we have the same story, if you are in Cape Town it will be great to have a cup of coffee together. I'm 34

    • @binibini7975
      @binibini7975 Год назад +1

      💛💛💛💛💛

    • @TakaiDesu
      @TakaiDesu Год назад

      Hope yoire doing well ❤

    • @iamfree3260
      @iamfree3260 Год назад

      U cnt be happy if U want them to go to hell

  • @MattGraves-dc4yr
    @MattGraves-dc4yr 11 месяцев назад +28

    Can’t care what others think cause most people don’t have your best interest in mind

    • @debbiefloresbrown5317
      @debbiefloresbrown5317 Месяц назад

      Exactly. Only you know best what is best for you ❤ Trust in God and in yourself.

  • @lindajackson4631
    @lindajackson4631 11 месяцев назад +8

    What people think of me is none of my business

  • @SOLANA_KING
    @SOLANA_KING 11 месяцев назад +179

    Thanks for the content, I often think about what other people think of me. I'm already on my way to success. Trading has been the main source of income, although I hardly do it.

    • @SOLANA_KING
      @SOLANA_KING 11 месяцев назад

      Kingsley Taylor Trading

    • @SOLANA_KING
      @SOLANA_KING 11 месяцев назад

      He’s on i.n.s.t.a.g.r.a.m

    • @sozekyser2837
      @sozekyser2837 5 месяцев назад

      I have always wanted to go into trading. I hope you don't mind me asking are you self taught or you had to study this field in order to understand it please?

  • @raymondtendau2749
    @raymondtendau2749 Год назад +273

    Those who are terrified about what others think about them are actually terrified about all the shitty things they think about themselves being reflected back at them.
    -Mark Manson.
    The Subtle Art of not giving a f*ck

    • @Autisticles
      @Autisticles Год назад +2

      Lol, so how do I stop caring about what I think then?

    • @raymondtendau2749
      @raymondtendau2749 Год назад +13

      @@Autisticles you don't control what others think. Just like you(or me) dont control the weather. Stop caring .

    • @19ars92
      @19ars92 Год назад +1

      @@raymondtendau2749
      then how do you improve personally if you lack self criticism?

    • @anushka5933
      @anushka5933 Год назад +1

      @@Autisticles We're on the same page ig : )
      Maybe mediation and focusing on ourselves a little more will help !

    • @elyahdarkp
      @elyahdarkp Год назад

      Why do you have to offend me so? 😂😢

  • @sonnyroy497
    @sonnyroy497 Год назад +71

    I quit giving a 'F' what people thought about me a long time ago, best thing that ever happened to me. ☺️

    • @Flip2raw
      @Flip2raw Год назад +3

      how ? im trying to

    • @MohsinKhan-nn6xu
      @MohsinKhan-nn6xu Год назад

      @@Flip2raw Its simple people dont give a Fck about you than why should you give a shit? also we all are gonna die one day, do you wanna spend your life doing things you love or worry about what others think of you? if someone doesn't like you its most likely that they are unhappy with their own lives and projecting on you. so next time u hear someone said this about u, i need you to tell yourself i dont give a Fck. and if same people praise you in your head say i dont give a fck either i am happy i don't need you to tell me who i am.

    • @CharlotteRivera-mx1lg4
      @CharlotteRivera-mx1lg4 Год назад

      Yeah me too.

    • @AnthonyManzio
      @AnthonyManzio Год назад +1

      Being lonely then no one wants to talk to and isolating you from being mobbed and gaslighted at work for being the best worker wanting you to quit. Which will never happen. Lazy bum bullies never get fired.

    • @philipholding
      @philipholding 3 месяца назад

      Just like that! Wow.

  • @Christina-yu3gu
    @Christina-yu3gu Год назад +107

    I turned 40, went skydiving, months on end I felt invincible & started to really live for me. Nope, never, Nada don’t care wat others think 🙏🏻💕

    • @AlwayysBeKind
      @AlwayysBeKind Год назад +5

      That’s awesome. Can I ask how do you get to that point? I’m in my thirties and so tired of looking down at my feet when I walk out of fear of what people say about me. I used to be confident and then people started to talk about me because I’m a tall big boned woman that resembles my dad in the face. So you can only imagine what they say. It hurts me so bad to the point I completely avoid people and can’t make eye contact out of fear they are thinking that Thing that people say. I’m a woman that just wants to accept myself and no longer worry about what they think, but soon as I walk out of my front door everyday I’m triggered. It hurts. 😢

    • @carrie3982
      @carrie3982 Год назад

      That’s awesome. I went skydiving at 25 years old only 9 weeks after I had my daughter. People commented about how I could do that as a new mother and what if something happened to you. People judge everything about you. I obviously lived and it was one of the best things I even did. My daughter is 25 herself now. I hope she goes skydiving one day too

    • @MAR7LO
      @MAR7LO Год назад

      🎉🎉👏🏽

    • @Christina-yu3gu
      @Christina-yu3gu Год назад +3

      @@AlwayysBeKind I got to that point becuz I was an Officer & lived thru the crazy patrol life almost killed but I did it to ask God why am I still here alone no kids nothing, just me. My answer was ur mission is not done I lived I jumped out at 14 thousand feet.

    • @sebastianliwinski222
      @sebastianliwinski222 Год назад +1

      ​@@AlwayysBeKindTall is beautiful.

  • @tristanquezadadiaz4508
    @tristanquezadadiaz4508 Год назад +64

    Embrace yourself the way it is. Deep down it feels good not to be like everybody else.

    • @angt9367
      @angt9367 11 месяцев назад +1

      This is by far the best comment on here.

  • @ghostridda
    @ghostridda Год назад +30

    Life is a contradiction I understand. If you are trying to be liked, you won't be liked because you want to be liked for your own ego but if you care less about being liked, people like you more because they see you are independent, authentic and you know what's best for you which means that if someone successfully gets on your good side, you will know what's best for them. Survival 101

  • @KK7THK
    @KK7THK Год назад +165

    I hit this point in my early 20s when I realized my fear of what other people thought was controlling my every day life.
    I’m double that age now and it’s the best thing I ever did. I don’t have many friends (matter of fact, I have only one), but she is practically my sister, we’re that close.
    No one else has ever been able to rattle me and that, I’ve been told, makes me intimidating. I’ll take that any day over keeping people around me who aren’t worth the effort.

    • @nxbxxha_1764
      @nxbxxha_1764 Год назад +1

      We all care what people think of us, that's human nature and that's not a bad thing to make people have a good impression of us WTF, WHY are we trying to change our NATURE??? 💀 Everyone says they don't care until they're sobbing at 3 am, WE ALL FUCKING CARE! WE ALL GIVE A FUCK!

    • @nxbxxha_1764
      @nxbxxha_1764 Год назад

      @@RandomVChick Well, if you don't care, you're not a HUMAN BEING, with no feelings and no heart. As simple as that lol. All I know is that I'm a human being who care. Why? You want me to change who I am?

    • @nxbxxha_1764
      @nxbxxha_1764 Год назад

      @@RandomVChick I obviously DON'T GIVE A FUCK about what people say about me and criticism and hate, HOWEVER we as humans can't "not care" all the freaking time!!!!! 🫠 Maybe one day something will bother you then you will understand. It's not about having your shit together or not...Humans have their LIMITS. When you're not in someone's shoes, you better STFU. THANKSSSSSSSSSS

    • @nxbxxha_1764
      @nxbxxha_1764 Год назад

      @@RandomVChick K. That's what I was saying. All human beings care
      Thank you for proving my point.

    • @nxbxxha_1764
      @nxbxxha_1764 Год назад

      @@RandomVChick I'm empathic too that's the problem

  • @fatima_tiffany__
    @fatima_tiffany__ Год назад +81

    Extremely helpful video that came right in time - I work with a group of bitter women in their mid forties who constantly talk behind each others backs but this video taught me that their issue is that they’re mad that the ppl they talk about don’t care abt being liked and this group does - what a miserable way to live

    • @jackedkerouac4414
      @jackedkerouac4414 Год назад +6

      My last job was so toxic I ate lunch by myself every day. I'm so grateful for that experience since I vowed to never work in such a job ever again and started working for myself.

    • @angelachanellehuang5663
      @angelachanellehuang5663 11 месяцев назад +1

      Be true to yourself is probably more important

    • @angelachanellehuang5663
      @angelachanellehuang5663 11 месяцев назад

      ​@@jackedkerouac4414don't be alone

  • @ishanath3070
    @ishanath3070 Год назад +25

    The timing was just perfect ❤️

  • @toriviruette5
    @toriviruette5 Год назад +9

    I’m a proud introvert… and love it! I have a very low tolerance for the many stupid people in this world!

  • @3rdand105
    @3rdand105 Год назад +12

    I've gotten to a point in my life where I can walk into a room and nobody knows I'm there; I'm all right with that, by the way. I'm not concerned with others' opinions of me, and it's quite liberating. At work, it's said that my superpower is invisibility. I can literally be within 12 inches of a private conversation, and those who are speaking have no idea I exist. I'm pretty sure there's a vibe given off when the goal is external validation, and people can feel that. I'm no expert, though.

  • @saywhatyouwill405
    @saywhatyouwill405 Год назад +10

    I wish I didn’t care what others think of me, but I still kinda do. But old age has helped. The best quote I heard on this, “what others think of me is none of my business”.

    • @AnthonyManzio
      @AnthonyManzio Год назад

      so being isolated at work after being mobbed

  • @shawnnawalkingthunder7492
    @shawnnawalkingthunder7492 Год назад +2

    Teachers were the worst, hyper critical and judgemental, it is so hard to shut the voices down 😢 even 30 years after highschool!

  • @twotwinningcavs
    @twotwinningcavs Год назад +33

    Great video!!! The day I spoke up for myself (I was 25) at University instead of slumping back further into my chair was the day I stopped caring. If i could describe myself in one word it would be “random” doing things because I can whether people like it or not. I once drove an hour to IKEA just to buy some of their lollies…why? Why not? And by gaining this mindset brought like minded people into my life and I was happy to remove the toxic people who did not give meaning in my life.

    • @goddessof777
      @goddessof777 Год назад

      I drive to Ikea it takes me a hr but I freaking love it❤ like you say why not

  • @Domzdream
    @Domzdream Год назад +42

    I’m exactly this. And this is why I attract the right kind of people who I still have in my life. I don’t hide anything other than personal stuff.
    People are so afraid to discuss their music, film category, what makes them laugh etc. The truer you are to yourself and people around you, the better your existence will be.
    Though ….don’t run outside with a welly on your head. There’s limits to how honest you want to be.

    • @rebecks7727
      @rebecks7727 Год назад +1

      You can actually have too many boundaries and not enough boundaries mixed up in all the wrong ways.

    • @rebecks7727
      @rebecks7727 Год назад

      I cannot tell you how many people won't tell you what their favorite music or movie is. I've had a lot of times where a guys trying to get to know me yet he won't tell me simple stuff like that. I don't know if it's out of fear of judgment or trying to be mysterious or petty even. Even if I don't like the music or movie Etc I'm happy for people that they have their interests and hobbies and likes. I like being excited for people for their interests

    • @Domzdream
      @Domzdream Год назад

      @@rebecks7727 Yea...it's due to fear of judgement. I can tell you this with 100% certainty.
      People need to belong. It's basical survival. Reputation is literally everything! If your rep is tainted, so is your existence for whatever time they deemed necessary that you've suffered, for not fitting in in with them and their interests.
      It's nto their fault in a way. It's liek a tidal wave that they need to rise along with, because fighting it wont help them in the long run.
      So I dont blame you for doing the same.
      I was always a weird duck that way, always against conformity. But doing this made me unafraid. And now I've got many friends why are easily as close as my own family. Because they accept me fro my interests without any judgement, and thus I in turn do the same.

    • @Domzdream
      @Domzdream Год назад

      @@rebecks7727 Well sure. It's as the saying goes - keep an open mind, but not so open that your brains fall out.
      you know?
      You have to assess the situation, pretty much in every circumstance.
      Ultimately, it's always the case of - how important is this to you, being open and honest about who you truly are. You. Not like all therest who are clones of each other.

  • @carolinaverissimo9230
    @carolinaverissimo9230 Год назад +37

    It's amazing how deep, profound and true these words are. Thank you for your service to humanity, you're really helping a lot of people expanding their awareness, awakening and transforming their mindset and their whole lives. Therefore, changing the world, that would be a so much better place with self-aware, mindful and authentic people living their purpose, putting their unique talents in use.

  • @IamTheMom
    @IamTheMom Год назад +23

    I lived in a toxic marriage for 10 years. I was so broken trying to please an unpleasable person. 8 year later I really could not care less about what ppl think of me at work or others not super close to me. If they have a problem with me it is their problem not mine. 😂 It is so freeing just accepting that not everyone will like me or love me and being a ok with that. 💪🏼👏🏻

  • @deealex1402
    @deealex1402 Год назад +19

    this comes also with an age and maturity... when you are young you live for acceptance and you gotta be cool to be liked and to have bunch of fake friends... then you grow up, you realize there are not many people around you that you can truly count on,you realize that no matter what someone will always have a problem with you or judge you. when you stop living for acceptance ,that is when you truly start living. i never had that issue, ive always been loner and that comes with not giving a fugge. what someone else think of me,is none of my business, i just live my life, do my own thing and bother no one.

  • @AJBuddha
    @AJBuddha Год назад +15

    What other people think doesn’t matter
    What matters is what you think of yourself

  • @GS-cg3yn
    @GS-cg3yn Год назад +14

    Holy cow! This is great! I have been in a self-made prison of people pleasing for so long I’m burning out.

  • @originalgoldengoddess
    @originalgoldengoddess Год назад +22

    I absolutely agree with this. Growing up I used to try and do everything I could to fit in... it wasn't so much about being liked for me it was about fitting in coz I literally felt so isolated... I would try and do anything to feel like I belong somewhere. These days I've embraced who I am and I really couldn't care less about belonging anywhere... I just want peace.

  • @fremont111
    @fremont111 Год назад +14

    Unfortunately, my experience has been that everyone IS very judgey - family, work, 'friends.' Say or do one thing that makes them look at you askance and you're building a case for them to reject you. But yeah, I'd love to not give a f**k.

    • @fremont111
      @fremont111 Год назад +1

      @AuthenticMath For what? Them being judgy? LOL

    • @barefootincactus
      @barefootincactus Год назад +1

      Maybe rejection by such people would be freeing. You’d have more time to look for non judgey others.

    • @snoozyq9576
      @snoozyq9576 Год назад +1

      Yea some people will judge you but others will respect your authenticity. You're never going to please everyone

    • @AnthonyManzio
      @AnthonyManzio Год назад

      @@snoozyq9576 100%

  • @Yonah_144
    @Yonah_144 Год назад +41

    Being submissive to another person doesn't necessarily make us weak, because there has to be a form of balance. It's like if you had a friend, significant other, or parent. Being too submissive gives away your power, but being too authoritative can push a person away.

  • @aaronmatthew7280
    @aaronmatthew7280 Год назад +26

    Another uplifting video 💪🏽 protect this man AT ALL COST!!! 🤙🏽

  • @lobomedina6312
    @lobomedina6312 Год назад +12

    I've met "life coaches" who were textbook Narcissists, all about them.
    This guy Curt is for real and is simply offering common sense solutions.
    "Be interested instead of being interesting".
    Wisdom.

  • @pierre0227
    @pierre0227 Год назад +18

    For me its about having a relationship with yourself. Practicing self love can mean anything you want it to be. Because I didn't have a healthy relationship with me parents, I need to speak to myself like I'm the adult I needed in my life. Speaking to a therapist also helps.

    • @OlivePartners
      @OlivePartners Год назад

      Looking for relationship between me an you

  • @ghostridda
    @ghostridda Год назад +13

    When I pause the video and just walk out, it's a sign that Clark is giving good stuff that I was not prepared to hear, not in a negative way but in a "that's why I've been f***ing up and it's game changing that I'm not prepared for" type of way

  • @louisegarner8888
    @louisegarner8888 Год назад +40

    It's an inside job where you go beyond 3d trust and safety to 5d certainty and inner conviction.
    Think in terms of connection rather than attachment.
    Become that I AM that acts in alignment with your own values and purpose at all times.
    Thanks Clark, you expressed this concept of self validation very well. 💕

    • @sliceofpie1741
      @sliceofpie1741 Год назад +1

      What's 5d

    • @iamfree3260
      @iamfree3260 Год назад

      EY wow !Louise was the name of the girl I admired in school she seemed to be that kind of confident that U speak ABT, kind to herself and others! Where r U from?!maybe U r her lol I wished I was her friend but I sun even know who she was friends

  • @TravelingTanga
    @TravelingTanga Год назад +12

    This is exactly what I needed to hear today. Thank you.

  • @rohanarora9793
    @rohanarora9793 Год назад +15

    Blew my mind when I learned how we're always looking "to get" or "to receive" instead of offering and giving more. It's a great mindset shift to make it more about the other person and what I can offer instead of always asking. Thanks Clark!

    • @OlivePartners
      @OlivePartners Год назад

      Looking for relationship between me an you

  • @splod44
    @splod44 Год назад +3

    I was having dinner with my teenage daughter and the answer to my question (which I can't remember) was " But dad what will everyone think " I said do you see the older gentleman dining alone in the corner . I want you to Think that you rally hate him really think it pure hatred . Okay now think that you really really like him . Did you notice anything in his world change ?

  • @heureuse8568
    @heureuse8568 9 месяцев назад +4

    When I'm authentic, I can be quite mischievous and bold. A bit sociopatic even. But also loving and caring.

  • @wesside9722
    @wesside9722 Год назад +15

    It’s crazy how you’re giving me more insight than my therapist

    • @theinvisibleman2194
      @theinvisibleman2194 Год назад +4

      Many of them are kind of a joke. Not much help.

    • @e.t926
      @e.t926 Год назад +2

      ​@@theinvisibleman2194i can totally relate

    • @intouch8789
      @intouch8789 Год назад +1

      BETTER HELP IS HERE FOR YOU...

  • @listeningwatching
    @listeningwatching Год назад +8

    ROMANS 12:21
    MATTHEW 16:19
    LEVITICUS 19:18
    🗝🗝🗝🗝🗝🗝🗝

  • @mathewclifton3132
    @mathewclifton3132 Год назад +10

    Outstanding content Chad 🙏🏻.
    I am currently moving through a huge transformation at this moment in my life. I recently awoke from a coma and my entire personality changed from being heavily medicated. I have been fully diagnosed with epilepsy and lost the last three years of my memory amount of medication that I take every day is staggering.
    A large group of my friends that I interacted with judged me based on the way I was acting or how I interacting with them.... Needless to say I feel like I have been casted out of my tribe ( which I cherish ) perhaps watching this video a couple times a day will help me get back on track.
    My gratitude is 🙏🏻♾💯

  • @auggieoutdoors3325
    @auggieoutdoors3325 Год назад +12

    Man, this is spot on! I hit the "F it" phase of life right at the age of 40. It was unbelievably liberating. Politics, work drama, family drama, neighborhood drama, social media, learn to let it go. Complete waste of energy. Focus on your health & hobbies. Ditch the middle class rat race. Live to serve and not to please, especially your spouse and kids!

    • @jaysouthmusic8230
      @jaysouthmusic8230 Год назад +1

      Yup that’s true because we only get one life and life is too short

    • @mmp495
      @mmp495 Год назад +1

      Absolutely 💯 ❤

    • @eightsprites
      @eightsprites Год назад +1

      Your second life starts when you realise you only have one.

    • @jaysouthmusic8230
      @jaysouthmusic8230 Год назад

      @@eightsprites that is the truth

    • @sozekyser2837
      @sozekyser2837 5 месяцев назад

      Love THIS @Auggieoutdoors3325 ❤

  • @kevinbrooks9074
    @kevinbrooks9074 11 месяцев назад +2

    Imagine standing up for truth in college....

  • @govegan6112
    @govegan6112 Год назад +5

    I wasn't born with the Pleasing People gene. I can tell you, this makes a lot of ppl not like me. Ppl are often jealous of those who are very confident.

  • @syntacticcave9514
    @syntacticcave9514 Год назад +7

    When you donot care about what others think you are at your most powerful.

  • @NightOrchids
    @NightOrchids Год назад +5

    Someone once told me... "The more interested you are in others, the more interesting you are as a person"... Im 52 and ive struggled with people pleasing all my adult life and watching this brought tears to my eyes.. as an empath, its easy to fall into "fix everyone" mode.. but it took a narcissisticic friendship and abuse for me tostop and look at my self neglect.. but i will not live the next 40 yrs of my life alone and miserable... Great video.. Thank you Clark 🙏

  • @Candiceemry
    @Candiceemry Год назад +25

    When you started talking about how we think that everyone is looking only at us & judging us, I immediately thought about how I am sometimes anxious of going to the gym… and then there you are talking about it just the next second! Love the signs😅

    • @kendrarhodes6425
      @kendrarhodes6425 Год назад +1

      Everyone else is thinking about themselves too probably.

    • @Rachel-yb6nr
      @Rachel-yb6nr Год назад

      ​@@kendrarhodes6425 no duh

  • @Bray-Official
    @Bray-Official 11 месяцев назад +1

    People struggle with self-doubt, and what other people think about them! - here is my piece of advice. "don't give a fu**"

  • @machellecron5786
    @machellecron5786 Год назад +8

    I love this! Thank you!!! 💞 I’m going to play this for my 13-year-old daughter too. 🎉 I’m hoping by telling her these things while she’s young will give her a better go in life. I’ve been telling her to be her true self since she can walk and talk. I’ve also shared with her, people will gravitate towards her because of her authenticity. Just like moths and such are attracted to the light. They can’t help it, just like us!

  • @andrewboland1062
    @andrewboland1062 Год назад +2

    At the age of 26, I've only gotten to the point where If I say or do something now, and people don't like that, F THEM!. I always knew that, but still cared at the time, it's only now I'm starting not to give 2 F's

  • @licksnkicks1166
    @licksnkicks1166 Год назад +4

    I changed my whole demeanour 2 1/2 weeks ago. I truly am my own best friend. I am true to me because I can’t care anymore what others think of me. You either hate me or love me. Idc. I really don’t.

  • @baritunde
    @baritunde Год назад +2

    Clark, I don't necessarily care what people think, but I do care about them sharing their unsolicited opinions with me. People are very empowered to act as trolls, adopting an agenda to bring you down, hurt your feelings, or incite you defend yourself in an equally hostile way so others can know how you REALLY are...And all this instead of tending to their three Billy goats gruff. Think whatever you want about me, but keep it to yourself unless I invite your opinion.

  • @TR-nh7xf
    @TR-nh7xf Год назад +8

    Hands down best video on RUclips! You knocked this one out of the park. This was perfect timing and you nailed the entire video. Thanks for making this video because this is what I am dealing with and have been trying to fix. You have helped me a lot, so thank you!

  • @Eric-kz9bk
    @Eric-kz9bk Год назад +3

    I’m gonna stop going to the gym and stop shaving and hell stop wiping my butt cuz I don’t care what y’all think!!! 😂😂😂 JK this is great and came in exactly when I needed it ❤

  • @Aurelie-SecretSmokerSpecialist
    @Aurelie-SecretSmokerSpecialist Год назад +9

    Really amazing video, and great authentic content, thank you for this Clark I needed to hear it today, it's been a roller coaster this past 3 years, I am dealing with this and you helped.

  • @loreall.2461
    @loreall.2461 Год назад +67

    This is exactly the kind of educational content our younger generation should be learning in schools.
    I shall share this video with some other younger women I know who will likely use the inspiration. There are always daily challenges in life and this video serves as a daily reminder to continue to persevere.
    Thank you.😊

    • @hepo3544
      @hepo3544 Год назад

      i am a teacher and we study one hour a week something like this

  • @vanDalle
    @vanDalle Год назад +1

    Man, quoting Curt Cobain in the context of making yourself a better person is not a good idea considering, how he decided to end his life. The fact he decided to commit suicide is a clear evidence, that the rules he has in his life just failed. You can have a hope that if you'll stay yourself and be loved for it, but at the end of the day there is a huge chance, that you'll end up completly alone, as it took place in his case.

  • @LDT7Y
    @LDT7Y Год назад +4

    Agree with everything except giving people things for free. I did that for 35 years and only attracted a lot of 'takers'. On the rare occasion that I really needed help, no one gave a damn. I was left with pretty much nothing at the end of it. Now that I focus mostly on myself, I'm making a lot more money (due to not giving my time/work/skills/knowledge away to everyone). I still give to a few people who I know actually appreciate it and charities that I know will use the money/time/work for genuinely good things. But the majority of people I meet are just parasites and there for a free ride at my expense, and I quickly kick them to the curb without feeling guilty. People still try to demand or guilt trip me into paying for or doing stuff for them, and retraining them to stop acting like spoilt brats and leave me the hell alone is taking a while. But I already feel a lot more free. The biggest lesson I've learned in life is that most humans aren't worth the oxygen they use and will stab you in the back without a second's thought if it benefits them. If you are a 'creator/giver/fixer' type, then don't make the mistake of assuming everyone else thinks the same way. You'll just be a walking target and end up burnt out and alone. I no longer care what the majority of people think of me, because I no longer value or respect their opinion. I realise what they are and no longer put everyone else at a higher level.

  • @RocketVet
    @RocketVet Год назад +3

    What do you do though when other people's opinions have control over your life? My boss's opinion of me determines if I keep my job or not, or if I get a good eval or raise. My partner's (who left me) opinion determined if I lost my home or not - I did. A judge's opinion determines if I get to be in my children's lives. My family's opinion of me determines if I am homeless or not. Sadly, I usually can't help but feel that phone is always out over that ledge - because for me it usually is. It's easy to not care about someone's opinion if they don't have power and control over your life.

  • @NightOrchids
    @NightOrchids Месяц назад +1

    Great video.. I needed this pep talk.. Thank you 😊... Im on my healing journey right now, but its a daily work... My dear mother once said..... The more interested you are in other people, the more interesting you are as a person.. Read, learn, take up a new hobby, get out of the house.. talk to strangers in Cafes, on buses, in queues.. see them as opportunities to expand and learn , instead of thinking "Why me".. .. .. actively do different things... If you always do what youve always done, You'll always get what youve always got.... Keep up the good work 🙏

  • @TravisPluss
    @TravisPluss Год назад +5

    I needed to hear this. I have become more and more people pleasing over the past several years that I’ve been neglecting my true self.

  • @mrplatink
    @mrplatink Год назад +3

    I've lost so many friends because of my attachment/neediness/desperation. You'd think I would have learned already...

  • @Rainmakers84
    @Rainmakers84 Год назад +2

    The best Madmen scene: Don Draper getting out off an elevator telling a critising underling " I don't think of you at all".

  • @AssataAmani
    @AssataAmani Год назад +5

    Thank you so much for this! Really made me realize how I'm attached to other's opinions of me. And I never was like this until recently and couldn't tell where it was coming from. Thank you!!!

  • @Keno_here
    @Keno_here Год назад +7

    Love it! Following for some time now and you’ve both sides. The intuitive side going with the flow but also the “hard grinding” side. Also charismatic and very good communicative! We’ve also had many of the same mentors 🙌

  • @paul8731
    @paul8731 Год назад +2

    Love it. Wanted to voice that I disagree with the idea that if you work for free you'll get lots of work (money) coming back to you. I get the sentiment here, but someone with low self esteem (people pleaser) can really undersell their value here and feel bad for charging a healthy rate for their work. Charging money for what you do can coexist with a service mindset. No one should ever feel they have to work for free to make it. If someone has made the decision as a true personal choice that's great. But anyone out there tired of working for free, getting taken advantage of, and not feeling like its coming back, you can stop and start charging. If someone doesn't pay, find a client that will, you are worth it. Much love ♥️

  • @BC-2
    @BC-2 Год назад +7

    To me, rejection by coworkers is kinda nice. I can't even fake being in mind numbing conversations, like your sexual ventures, how drunk you got, and much more. So, alone is good.

  • @emilyclay3485
    @emilyclay3485 Год назад +5

    More on attachment theory please, and reframing.....I am in the process of some big changes and these are so so helpful!! Keep up the great work! Also am interested in your coaching program.

  • @UltimateTechHub
    @UltimateTechHub Год назад +2

    Great title! I though it was a David Goggin's video!! LOL! If you make RUclips videos for a living you definitely shouldn't care about what people think about you. Its a great skill to master!

  • @potatobanana197
    @potatobanana197 Год назад +3

    If I remove the negative thoughts there's nothing there. I don't know how to manufacture happiness when no part of me is happy

  • @properdoe3414
    @properdoe3414 Год назад +2

    Ive tried man being interested…that doesnt work with everyone. Some ppl are literally just huge a-holes.

  • @VeritasSineTimore
    @VeritasSineTimore Год назад +5

    Hello there ,this is my first time viewing your content and I have to say that you have great insight into the human condition and how to rectify some social ills .Great job!!!

    • @beautygabriel6684
      @beautygabriel6684 Год назад

      I tell you, you need to see his other videos. Just make sure you're watching the ones related to your current phase in life, so you get to actually do what he says.

  • @MrTheomighty1
    @MrTheomighty1 Год назад +2

    Clark for some reason a video that I liked that you made has some how vanished. It’s the one where you sit on a golf course after it’s rained and nobody is around. You talk about talking to your dad not very often but you tried it on him and then a mate. It’s where you write your persons name on your phone. Any chance you can send me a link please because that video has always helped me
    Cheers

    • @hendrixxuganda
      @hendrixxuganda Год назад

      The "Manifest a text message" video? You're right, it's gone! I thought there was something wrong with my RUclips. I can't find it anywhere 😕

  • @SeanTyson-i9l
    @SeanTyson-i9l Год назад +3

    You have a great knowledge of self, and your words resinate with me on a deep levle. I'm sure you help people every day. I want you to know you have help me personally in developing my self and building myself up from what I was to who I am now, so thank you for your time and help. My gratitude to you sir

  • @TonyTone1
    @TonyTone1 Год назад +1

    This guy sticking his middle finger using profanity in video title has no class with child behavior. It’s Looks like, it really bother him and he cares about what people think about him. Otherwise he won’t display that negative behavior

  • @thejohnronin
    @thejohnronin Год назад +3

    You helped me change my life and find myself… Thank you.

  • @steveconn
    @steveconn Год назад +2

    By your late forties you better not care that much. This is it (and most people are judgemental unthinking twits anyway).

  • @Fahim_Lalani
    @Fahim_Lalani Год назад +3

    ❤my new mantra thx 🙏🏻 to you is “it’s okay to be your true self “

  • @tiwari.3
    @tiwari.3 Год назад +1

    I don't know what to say just a few minutes ago i was crying my eyes out bcz my mom said I can never be do anything in my life as I couldn't clear a entrance test.. and all my relatives came a says bad things to me but no one cares about me it's just like every one wants to see the success prospectives.... But I am not happy with it....i am alone just studying and i m not liking it. I don't want success if it not come with mental peace.
    Sometimes feels like dying..
    But life goes on....