I'm so happy you're here. I so EXCITED to tell you about this because it absolutely changed my life. I needed this so badly and consider it a "God thing" that I know about it now. I'd love to hear what you think? And how's your week going?
Hi there, thank you for sharing this technique, I am going to try it out and see if I can get my partner to start using it. We are both ADHDers (late diagnosed) and we struggle to manage our energy well. I wanted to share something with you because you talk about having Fibromyalgia. I was active in a large Peri/Menopause FB group a couple of years ago and a number of women who had Fibromyalgia started talking about how their symptoms dramatically improved and even disappeared after starting HRT, one woman started HRT on purpose as a friend had seen this and told her and she said the relief was almost instantaneous. I told my friend who had been suffering with Fibromyalgia symptoms for a decade and she was hugely sceptical but as she was also having Peri type symptoms she decided to start HRT. She didn't want to admit it so she kept shtum for a couple of months but then wrote a long post for the group about how she saw almost instant relief too and that most of her FM symptoms were gone and had stayed gone. It may be that some women are getting misdiagnosed with FM when actually it is Peri, or it could be that FM is caused by Peri, who knows. There also has been some discussion about Long Covid symptoms being improved when on HRT but I have less anecdotal evidence on that. Anyway, I just thought you might be interested if you are not on HRT, it might be worth you trying it. Even if you are long past going into Menopause you can still start HRT at any point in life theoretically, you just need to find a Menopause specialist who is trained in *Regulated *Body-Identical HRT (rBHRT) and NOT *Compounded *Bio-Identical HRT (cBHRT). Even if you no longer have a uterus you can still benefit from taking oral systemic micronised true Progesterone (Utrogestan is the brand name in most countries) and transdermal Oestrogen is a must for all women. Check out the Balance Menopause website for science based information on everything Peri/Meno and HRT that challenges the misinformation and myths that are so prevalent. It is worth noting that unfortunately most doctors, even OBGYNs etc are woefully under trained and misinformed about Per/Meno and HRT so please don't rely on what they have told you previously, you really need to see a trained Menopause specialist, preferably one who is experienced treating women with FM and complex medical history such as yours. I hope this is helpful.
@@cuppajoylady I’ve been doing this long enough that I am automatically checking in with myself all day. For a long time - when I was still having to use the calendar - I checked in and marked it 4-5 times a day. If I ever start noticing that things are sliding backwards. I will use the calendar again. Hope that helps!
I took notes so I figured I'd post them here in case anyone else would like them. Check in with yourself throughout the day (ideally 4 or 5 times a day). At that moment, notice your energy level and record it with a colored dot: _Green_ - feeling good and like you can do things - ideal for getting things done _Yellow_ - starting to get tired in your brain, body, or emotionally - often we are tempted to push through this zone - ideal time to take a break: - short walk - coloring in a coloring book - activities where you can "turn your brain off" or your mind can wander aimlessly - taking a break closer to the onset of this level can mean that you recharge in a shorter amount of time _Red_ - stop! - feeling exhausted, hard to be around other people, low amounts of patience - feeling like you can't handle even one more thing _Purple_ - really unwell - depression - suicidal thoughts may appear - unable to take care of basic life tasks, like showering and eating - make basic life tasks as easy to accomplish as possible (ex: baby wipes "shower", ready-made food and snacks) - don't guilt yourself in this state! give yourself permission to take care of yourself
This was very kind of you to do. Hope it helps others as they are inspired to start using the dots method after watching the video and hearing my story. Thanks!
COLORED dots. Thank you so much for typing this list! I've written it down for myself, writing the color name in that color🎉😊. May we all take better care of ourselves and be well! God bless us in Jesus' name, amen!
Anyone else feel purple but force themselves to keep going because everyone expects you to? That has been my life. How wonderful it would be to be allowed to just REST. Just rest.
I spent too much time during my life doing that. It’s no wonder I ended up collapsing for a while. I wish I had known about the spots earlier, but am grateful I know about them now.
That's how I live most of the time. On the outside we look fine so people don't believe we're unwell and unable to keep going and the comments reminding you that you didn't get much done are sole destroying, so I keep pushing myself to prove that I'm not lazy but then I feel worse. Now that I have young kids, I'm convinced that I'm going to die from exhaustion soon. Even if I give myself permission to stop and rest, I cannot actually rest because I can hear the comments playing in my head about how I could be doing something useful instead of laying on the sofa so I end up getting up and doing work again. I wish I could find a way to just switch off for a while
So sorry you are going through this! It is so hard to have young children. I remember feeling like I got up in the morning and ran all day long until I collapsed into bed at night. I know it might not help much right now, but the physical demands will lesson in time. Then the kids are demanding emotionally, but at least you’ll be able to sleep longer in the morning and you won’t have to watch them every second. Would it be possible for your husband to watch them for a while each week so that you can get away and rest a bit. Maybe even just sit in your car alone and decompress. We believe you. We know how it is for people to misjudge us. I hope you can get to the point where you can dump their wrong thinking and be more settled in your knowledge that you ARE doing the best you can under the circumstances. Have you ever heard of thought replacement? When you catch yourself thinking harsh things about yourself, you immediately replace it with something like, “I am doing what I can and I’m proud of myself for that. I have hope for the future and right now, I am going to accept myself. I am loved, lovable, and loving.” Things like that. There are some really good flip cards by Louse Hay that I have used. They are called “Power Thought Cards.” Beautiful and fun to look at. They have hopeful, positive thoughts on them that will build you up. I have used them in the past to help me replace negative thinking about myself and it really works. I have even picked out some and stuck them to the wall or mirror so that I saw them all the time. They worked amazingly well. You can get them on Amazon. You’ll be able to narrow down and pick out some that feel like you need them most right now. I read them out loud twice a day. Then you may find that you need some different ones. (I really should include them in a video!) Hope that helps!
As a school teacher, I feel like I live my life in a seesaw of yellow and red The last couple of years I've been feeling so burned out, bursting into tears for no apparent reason. I have had many sick days, but I won't go and see my doctor. Since Friday I think I'm now in purple. Haven't showered now for days. I've now decided that on Monday I'm going to see my doctor.
Oh my goodness… yes. I think you should see your doctor. I was a school teacher and it did get tiring, but not to the level you are talking about. I hope you can get some answers!
I was a school teacher too. I loved that job. I had to quit. I mourned it so badly though. I'm a really bad case though - 90% bedridden. I'm grateful to be able to find others to tell this too who get it. Thank you ladies! And I wish the best of health for both of you.
I just found out im autistic and that autistic burnout has been happening for years. Trying to get over it. This seems very useful. I feel guilty for not being able to do things, like everyone else.
I'm not sure if I have something (I suspect ADHD, my brothers were tested but I was expected to get over stuff and just do things). I feel exactly the same as you. I'm trying my best, and that's all you can do. Especially when depression happens, that makes it even harder☹️ Hang in there, friend; you're worth it!🫂
I hope that you can find a way to accept that you are doing the best you can do. I have depression, anxiety, ADHD, and probably a touch of OCD. I struggle with motivation and energy every single day, so I understand. Do the best that you can do and then praise yourself for doing it. The best you can do is all that you can do, and it's enough.
Killer dots is more fun. I’m 73 and have learned that each day I start with only a certain amount of energy and must decide what to spend it on. Major surgery on my digestive system in my 20’s with long term effects, then fibromyalgia, chronic anemia, and Covid twice for sure have really impacted my wellbeing. I’ve been doing something similar to your coloured dots for years using my kitchen calendar. I use coloured pens, pencils and highlighters and can look back on my weeks and months and see how I’ve done. I also use emojis sometimes to express myself. Instead of a journal, I use the calendar to mark down notable activities, events and people I met or talked to. I like your coloured dots though as a more concise way to keep track of myself on each day. It will take up less room on my calendar.
I have a few tips in that video with 53 tips. But sleep can be a struggle. Have you ever been tested for sleep apnea or reflux? I have to take sleep medication because it’s common for people with Fibro to have sleep problems. Working on sleep quality is the top thing they do. I also find I am extremely sensitive to sound and light and sometimes I get woken up by odd things - even the air conditioner coming on or someone coming in the front door (the door pops) can be a problem.
I love this method. Most days I try to push myself but then I end up in red and purple. I wake most days in yellow. But I had a realization from this video. Yesterday I felt like I had a bit of a head cold coming on and I went into what I call taking care of me mode. I made myself soup and a cup of cocoa (yes in the summer). I enjoyed it and took the day slow doing something that wasn't on a to do list. After most of the day went by I got up and told my hubby I was going to get some work done because I was feeling better. Your video made me realize I need to do selfcare everyday when I start to get tired not just when I am sick.
I'm so happy to hear that this is helping you. It's made such a great difference in my life. I'll always be grateful to John for teaching it to me. I'm glad I could share it with you.
This is such a good toolset to give someone at the beginning of chronic fatigue or neurodivergent burnout. I've learned how to do this intuitively over the last four years, but it would have made a world of difference if, when I went to the hospital a month after COVID, the doctor had handed me this. Instead, no one knew what to do because at the time, no one was talking about post-viral illness except the people who had it. It was a year and a half before I even learned that ME/CFS existed and that I could learn from patients who'd been through this much longer than I. It took another year and a half before I learned how to pace myself reliably. I can't imagine how much faster I might've started to improve if my wife had been able to ask me every several hours (when I didn't have the cognitive capacity to do it myself), "what color are you feeling?" Edited to add: Oh my gosh, I feel so similarly to what you said at the end. I'm not glad I got Long COVID. It took so much from my life. And yet...I had no capacity to listen to my body before. I had no capacity to let myself rest and no capacity to prevent myself from constantly burning out and working through it. For all that Long COVID has taken from me, it has at least given me that.
I’m so glad to hear that it going to be helpful. John made such a difference in my life when he taught this to me. I still have to use it every single day because it is a continual challenge to maintain my health and energy. It’s so up and down but, as you said, being able to communicate which color-state I am is so helpful to me and my family. Today is an “orange” day for me. Not quite red but more than yellow.
can't thank you enough for this. this has been working AMAZINGLY for me (and my boyfriend). We now actively tell each other when we are feeling green, yellow, red, or purple. we don't ask each other to do anything if we aren't green. we basically have a house chore system where we both help out, but don't expect each other to do anything while yellow, and definitely not red. purple is drop everything and make sure the other person is okay and keep checking on them. he told me he was feeling stressed and I didn't think it was that bad until he added on that he was purple. then I understood how bad he meant it was. so it has been helping a lot with communication AND understanding myself. also, one of the main helpful things is telling each other while out that we are starting to go to yellow. that means it is time to go home. even if we had more planned we are done.
I just found you as I sat waiting for dawn. I have fibro, post polio and just plain age and was calling myself 'lazy' because I couldn't get things done. You made me see I wasn't lazy, but most of my days are in the yellow stage. At best, yellow green. But that's ok. I need the rest and now I can do it without guilt! Thank you!
I've just taken a shower and am in yellow, verging on red. In a tricky transition and staying with my parents, which is not so great at the age of 54 and there's a lot of stress. I am too good at covering up how I honestly feel and they don't like to acknowledge I'm not well. I spend a lot of time in my room, trying to get back to a green, or even a yellow, then engage with them again and retreat to recover. It's a very useful video - thank you! I've been pushed to purple and red too many times over the past eighteen months and I feel totally validated by this. At least insanity is one less thing to stress about!
I'm so glad it has helped you. Tracking your energy states will help you. When I was learning to do it, I taught my family members what the colors meant and then, over time, I could say to them, "I better rest because I'm in the yellow and I can tell that if I don't, I'll end up in the red." It became a signal to them that you do need to rest and they got more and more supportive. It gave us a langue to communicate with and over time, they stopped thinking that I was exaggerating. Now, if I tell my husband that I'm sliding into red (I sometimes say "orange", because I'm past yellow but not quite to red," he'll firmly tell me to go rest. They have learned that the more I honor yellow, the faster I am back in the green and it makes a difference to all of it. I hope that your parents can get it. It could make a big difference for all of you!
I feel for you. I've been in this situation in my fifties and it's tough. From my experience, I would say focus as much as you can (gently, without forcing) on any friendships or interests you have that make you feel good about yourself and boost your confidence, that give you a healthy sense of yourself and your place in the world. Someone above mentioned looking at nature, funny films... whatever you have access to and helps. Looking back, I can see that I didn't do enough of this, I was so bogged down in the situation, health problems, difficult transition and aware that my parents were worried about me and didn't know how to help.... disempowering to my sense of myself as an adult. With some help from a wonderful local healer I was eventually able to move on. Remember, this situation doesn't make you any less of who you are, even if it might feel like it. Be proud of who you are and what you've accomplished and coped with in your life, even if no one else sees those things. I find being around parents/ family can make me feel invisible... putting a hand on my heart, the other one on my belly, helps me to re centre and give myself some love. You'll find a way through this. My heart is with you, I wish you strength and lots and lots of tender self-care 💞🌹
@@laurenlauren4239 Thank you for your supportive words. My parents did indeed betray me through lack of trust shortly after writing this, but my sister came through for me. I am in a challenging financial situation which triggers a lot of shame, and I've been trying to find somewhere to live and coming up against my fears and shame...and somehow taking them on and turning it all around. The result is that I am soon to move into a place of my own, despite my worries, the right little property popped up in right timing, all the referencing checks went through and I am arranging the tenancy start date. The next couple of days will be floating around orange, but knowing what I need to move the needle back to green. The thought of having access to all my creative things is what is keeping me going! It's so nice to hear a success story. Thank you and much love 🤗💕
I have been doing this method organically but I like the idea of colors which can be used to explain your current state to your family without having to tax yourself thinking of the words to explain. This video should be required listening for anyone with a chronic illness.!! Ty
That’s what the colors do for me. Nobody knew what I meant (including me) when I said, “I don’t feel good.” Being able to give them a color has been game changing. I feel so blessed to have met John and am happy that I could pass this along.
There's nothing to feel guilty about when you're taking care of yourself! Really needed to hear this right now, as I'm early in pregnancy struggling with morning (all day) sickness and fatigue and having a hard time getting much of anything done.
Yes, take care of yourself! The sickness will pass, but then, after you have the baby, you'll be so busy it will feel hard to take care of yourself whenever you can. You'll probably have to let your standards drop for awhile, but it's okay. It really is. Sometimes, things are more important that keeping everything shiny and clean. So happy for you about the baby!
This is the absolute BEST pacing advice I’ve ever heard. I have Long Covid and autoimmune disease. My doctor is always telling me to pace, but I had no idea how. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for making this incredibly helpful and informative video about pacing! 🙏💖
I'm so happy to hear doctors are finally telling people to PACE. I can't believe it! I never thought I'd hear this in my lifetime. - lifelong ME and Fibro sufferer (probably long COVID now too)
I had three years of CBT trauma therapy after my 30 year abusive marriage ended. This aligns so much with the tools that I’m already using some of which I forget to use from time to time and things slip into old patterns. Rebuilding my life has been extremely difficult, had Covid in the midst of it all and having to start a career at 60. Taking care of an elderly mother, my children’s lives being in turmoil and my grandchildren, I tend to not take care of myself as much as I should. I too push through, where I end up in purple, a terrifying place to get to and SO challenging to come out of. This is a gift from God and an answer to prayer. Thank you so much!
You certainly have had some large challenges to deal with! Wow. I am sooo glad this video has been helpful to you. Thank you for letting me know. It’s a blessing to me. I hope you have a nice weekend!
Same here. I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia in 2000. Mom of 8 and the youngest diagnosed with Down Syndrome/Autism, and abusive spouse. I was able to leave the SOB in 2013 with my special needs son and life got better. But because we shared a special needs son, he still didn't leave me alone. Long story short, I got long-term Covid in January of 2021. However, as I was still recovering, in November of 2022, the ex began a legal nightmare that still isn't resolved today (he's stringing it out) and I've been in purple since then. Now, my 8 kids are grown adults with the mom of 8 grown adult children, with 7 spouses or SO, and 14-going-on-16, Grands. I'm so used to pushing myself but I physically cannot push myself any more. Even my 90 year old mother knows that. But in the midst of this legal battle, I work when my son's here (3 weeks out of the month and every other weekend) and do absolutely nothing the week/weekends he's gone. That's what I'm down to. And it is a scary place to be. Thank you for sharing so honestly. I can relate so much with what you shared, I immediately subscribed and watched the video again.
@dianefine7081 I’m so sorry about all you’ve been through. So many challenges and courage required to keep going. You’re very brave. It does sound like we have some things in common. I’m so glad you’re here!
You' re right - it's so hard. I remember that when my kids were small, I felt like I got up and ran all day long until I collapsed into bed at night. It was grueling. And when they are in certain time periods, it is just the way it is. They can't be ignored. In looking back at that time period, I'm wondering if part of my problems was that I can get kind of perfectionistic and hard on myself sometimes. I think I may have had too high of standards for myself. (Does that sound weird?) I think I'm improving here and, actually the dots have helped because they taught me to listen to body, but sometimes I still push myself harder than I should. I think it's a process to learn to do well, but not do so well that you harm yourself. What is that about the oxygen on the plane? You have to put it on yourself before you help others? I remember talking to my father about this very thing when my kids were small. I was telling him how exhausted I was and that I couldn't do any more and I felt bad about it. He said, "Don't run faster than you are able." He was a wise man. I'll never forget that moment.
This reminds me of a story that was told about Susanna, Wesley, mother of Charles Wesley. If I recall the story, correctly (no guarantees on that these days 😂😂😂), She had a large number of children, but they all knew to give her some peace and quiet when she put her apron over her face and head. That was her quiet time for prayer and meditation, and a little peace and quiet I suspect - a pause from the incessant demands of children. And no doubt prayers that they wouldn’t turn into hooligans when they got older! True or not, Susanna, or not, I love the idea of a mom carving out time, no matter what. If she could do it… Other moms can do it. On a similar note, other moms have trained their children to not interrupt unless fire, blood or broken glass are involved. Things like that. Same idea but with a thoughtful direction to keep people safe.
@@shoshanaeri8035 I love aprons! I have a nice collection and wear them all the time. I just didn't think of using them like that. Maybe the next time my grandkids get extra loud, I'll put the one I have on over my head. 🤣
This is frightening! So beautifully simple and like a brain worm, now that I’ve seen it I can no longer pretend! I’m an orange today and was prepared to behave like green, and it pulled me up! The pushing through is such a horrible compulsion but this is going to help me find constructive and kind ways to be in each of the colours. I have had ME/CFS for thirty years, which has included being bed bound. I am now very active but with good and bad days. This system and the intervals forces us to be honest with ourselves, that’s why it’s frightening, but that’s why it has the potential to be a game changer. Killer coloured dots! I love it. Thank you 🙏🏼 🤩
There are no coincidences. Your video came through my feed and I didn’t even read the videos titled. I just clicked to watch on a whim when I saw your kind face.
@@TowardsASimpleLife I don’t know how YT algorithms knew that I needed to learn and implement the dots method in my life because I’ve never searched or watched a video on this topic. What you described you have gone through with long C19…its what I’m experiencing currently. Your words hit deep. I’ve been red/purple for too long. I need to give myself more Grace and thanks to your kindness to help people out with your videos, I now have better tools to cope. I’ve already implemented the dots, currently purple and passing dinner off to my husband so I don’t have a meltdown. I am a firm believer in acknowledging and giving thanks to people for their good work and helping others out of the kindness of their hearts . 😊
Isn’t it neat how knowing about the Dots gives you a language to let you communicate with yourself and others about how you are feeling? It has been critical to my own life and has made such a difference with helping my family understand where I am and what I need to do. I’m so glad it is helping you too. John has blessed both of us!
I've heard of the spoon method, but haven't used it. Someone else said that they have been using the spoon method, but this seemed to be a little bit more clear to them. I don't know about that, but I do know I'm glad John taught me how to do this.
@@TowardsASimpleLife I've never heard of anybody actually doing the Spoon Method. It's usually just a way to explain what we're dealing with to other people - as in, you send them the story.
@@TowardsASimpleLife After I wrote that someone further down in your comments reminded us that you can tell or send the story to someone like that you live with, and then you can tell them you're on your last spoon. So you can use it. I forgot 'cause I don't use it.
❤ thank you. I needed this, tears are running in a healing way while listening to you. And I love watching, your bed is so lovely decorated, I like colours and flowers. Hope we all get energy back and heal. God bless you ❤
Killer Dots is SO much more fun than coloured dots, even though it's not quite right! I've realised that I am spending so much of my time in yellow and nowhere near enough in green. Too much in red and even in purple occasionally, when I have to cancel everything and everyone thinks I'm hopelessly unreliable. What a great way of describing how you are doing and alerting yourself to problems.
Yes, it's not quite right although it did occur to me that being in the red or purple feels like a killer state. Ha! I'm unreliable too. I've finally started to tell people that. I was extremely reliable before I got sick and now I'm not. I feel it's better for them to know that I really do want to go - and will go if I can - but that they shouldn't take it personally if I can't come. I'll be disappointed to. I'm also not reliable around here. My ability to do things is soooo up and down. It takes getting used to. But at least, I have the dots which helps me understand what's going on and when I need to stop back and "cool my jets" for awhile. I'm so glad John taught this to me!
I’m going to have my husband watch this entire video. He hasn’t learned to pace himself as well as I have but he is getting better. God bless you and yours❤️
I'm glad they're teaching people to PACE finally. I have Fibro too (and ME) and my rheumy and doctor were always yelling at me for gaining weight and not exercising enough and that was back when I could still exercise as a thing. I've got a new rheumy but no primary care doctor will take me now.
Ack. So sorry to hear that. I'm lucky in that my primary care doctor will take care of me, but it helps that I've had it so long that I know how to take care of myself.
@@TowardsASimpleLife That's good. I need a PCP for Rx lotion that helps a great deal with many issues I have and I have to see the Rheumy 4x a year to get my disability. The Rheumies won't Rx the medication I use because it's made in a special kind of pharmacy that makes them no money.
Thanks! I love color and have it everywhere in my home. I just couldn’t get into the grey and white color scheme. Seeing the colors I love around makes me feel good. So glad you like it too!
I’m a long hauler, 3 1/2 years now. This is the absolute best thing I’ve seen on pacing to date. I’m super visual, so to have a visual representation of how i am feeling and be able to color code it to measure is incredibly helpful. I’ve done so much OT and PT and no one has taught anything like this for pacing. Thank you for spending your own spoons to make this helpful video. ❤
Oh, I’m so glad that it is going to be helpful to you. It makes such a difference to me. I still mess up, but I can easily label where I am and know just what to do to get back in the green. And I can easily tell my family how I’m feeling and they get it. So glad I met John and he would be happy to know he helped you too!
@@TowardsASimpleLife may I ask how long you did cognitive rehabilitation? I’m about to start soon. Do you think that was the most helpful for you in recovery?
I was in CT around 9 months. What ended up happening to me was that I got Big C again and was really sick. My doctor gave me Paxlovid and it ended up helping my Long Covid too. I still have the after effects, and probably always will, but I took a leap forward. I don’t know how well I would have done without the Dots because I still use them every single day to assess where I am. (I don’t have to mark a calendar because it’s just part of me now.) For instance, two days ago I had a cleaning thing I had to do that I absolutely had to do and I knew it would be hard on me physically. It seemed to be okay afterward and so I did some other things. I should have stopped. Yesterday morning I felt awful, even a little depressed. I realized I was Orange (a made-up state because sometimes, yellow isn’t right but I’m not quite red). As soon as I realized what was going on, I stopped what I was doing and gave up with the idea that I could do anything other than recover. I’m a little better today. I did some things this morning but quickly hit yellow so I have to stop again. The worst thing is that my brain also goes dead when I’m not green and then I can’t figure out the thing I need to figure out. But I have no choice other than to cool it and wait when this happens to me. As soon as I feel better, I can figure things out. (Trying to plan a future video.) Pacing was the most valuable thing to come out of CT and really, was the thing John and I spent almost all of our time on. I’ve had some other doctors surprised by that answer, but then again, they didn’t know about the Dots until I told them about it. I tell them “pacing is everything.” When you are an “overachiever” like I am, it is so hard to accept you just can’t keep pushing through and do everything you can think up. I finally did accept it. This is my life. It’s okay. I hope this helps!
@@TowardsASimpleLife so sorry to hear you got the big C again! It’s just awful! Your reply is so helpful. Thank you for sharing your experience. I can relate SO MUCH to everything you said. I’m very similar. When I’ve depleted by batteries I can’t even form sentences. I really try to not get to that stage (purple) but it happens occasionally. I’m so excited to start this dot system to help pace better. So grateful for you sharing your experience. Wishing you many more Green Day’s and continued healing. 🙏🏻✨
OMG, thank you so much for this live-saving resource. I’ve been told by specialist to learn to PACE for the last 5+ and this is he first time it’s actually been explained in a way I find accessible.
The fact that specialists and doctors know to tell people to PACE is amazing to me. Us ME patients tried for years to get Wikipedia to state this in their page on ME/CFS but to no avail for so long. I personally tried too as well, but they wouldn't listen and they kept pushing more exercise as the solution for us. Finally a few years ago they changed it but I still hear many patients say their doctors remain clueless about it and quite a few of those patients see docs at Stanford who still treat them abysmally.
My choice is Magical dots! Also, since i LOVE the color purple, I'm going to use brown for that stage. Thank you for this! I can see it having a big impact on my fibro/cfs life. 😊❤
I love that you're adapting it. I ended up adding a couple of colors - particularly orange - because sometimes I am tireder than yellow, but not quite red. John thought it was funny, but he said that he's seen other patients do the same thing. I think it's just important that we start listening to ourselves, particularly when we have chronic illnesses. (You know that too!)
I’m so sorry you got sick with that nasty thing and it blasted you like that. Sucks. Blessings to your beautiful human soul, for still doing videos and sharing your message and inspiring insights. Much love ❤
@@TowardsASimpleLife I'm female and I see what society's expectations are. I can't live up to them anymore, it's just not an option, but I still struggle with the guilt thanks to my mean in-laws I plan on never talking to again.
I can't live without breaks. The to do list will still be ridiculous when I'm dead. I might as well not be dead prematurely because I'm trying to do too much.
Oof, that hit me hard! “The to do list will still be there when I’m dead” 😵 Such a good wake up call to prioritize self check-ins 😤👏🏼 And thanks Rozanne for the lovely video ❤️🩹
It would be fun to do a Happiness check in, using 3 smiley faces, one with a smile, one neutral, one sad mouth. If sad you could ask yourself what would make me smile. Love your energy dot idea and will start using it. My issue is when I collapse in a heap I feel guilty that stuff is not getting done so it is a downward spiral. I like the idea of just doing the essentials. Thanks for your channel.
Tracking your happiness level along with the dots is such a good idea, because your emotional state can be associated with how your feel physically. I'm so glad you're here! Have you seen my lastest video about the book, "How to keep house while drowning: by KC Davis? It may help you, because you don't need to feel guilty about doing less when you;re not feeling the best. KC is a therapist and she shares what she teaches her clients in the book, who suffer in this way. You can watch it here: ruclips.net/video/phQVHQjxGKk/видео.htmlsi=t7GjqbKs3DNSrzwS You might also want to watch the video about Essentialism. It really helped me start to figure out what I consider essential and what is non-essential (so I don't need to do it. ruclips.net/video/phQVHQjxGKk/видео.htmlsi=t7GjqbKs3DNSrzwS I hope that helps!
I’m 5 minutes into your video and nodding my head like I feel understood for the first time in 4 years when the Pandemic struck. I can see the look of non belief when I tell people ….. the Covid experience changed my life and who I am …. The brain change is real. I want to be who I was before …. To do more, be more, and push more. And I feel I appear lazy to others. But I’ve tested positive for COVID this week and I’m stuck in bed being forced to reevaluate my life. Bring on the Sanity of the Killer Dots!
Oh, I'm so glad you found this video! John really helped me so much with the Dots Method and I still use it. Sorry about the new incidence of Covid! Hope you get over it soon. Did you get some Paxlovid? The doctor gave it to me last time I got Covid and it helped. And yes, the brain change is real. I'm a lot better than I was, but there are somethings that I think I'll have to live with. I work to find copying mechanisms to get around them.
HI, I'm a millennial with a boomer work ethic.😆I wish that I had these amazing tips when I had my first MS relapse. It would have saved me much distress! At least I can put these into practice now. Thanks for the excellent video!
Brain fog is SO real. I hate it when it happens to me. The Dots help me reduce it and get over it faster, but it’s still a thing sometimes. Hope you feel better quickly.
@@TowardsASimpleLife When you were explaining how your brain is affected now on your other video I just came from, I could relate so well. I've been like that my whole life. My mother never has and she thought I just didn't care to pay attention or try. This life has kinda been a nightmare for me. You made me feel so much better about this. It really held me back in so many ways. I never wanted it to show so I stayed really small and totally shut down.
Killer dots is funnier! Watching you today has brought me from yellow to almost green in just 2 videos! Think I'll watch one more and then go take on the rest of my day (in green!!)
Thanks for this! I’m a school teacher in Australia and this is very much like what our Wellbeing team is implementing with our students, where they are required to check in several times over a day to see what “zone” they are in…It’s a program called Zones of Regulation, and has those colours you mentioned. Great ideas!
This is so interesting to me. What are the odds? I think it’s wonderful that you are teaching the students this. What a wonderful skill to grow up with!
This is so interesting to me. What are the odds? I think it’s wonderful that you are teaching the students this. What a wonderful skill to grow up with!
Great video! I use my celphone timer to take breaks and move around...its helping me not overdo. I am a long Covid hauler and after two years, i am actually changing my mindset from panicky to feeling grateful...i love your Dot process and actually follow it my mind where I am constantly checking up with myself... I stop when i realise any anxiety or stress setting in...
Oh goodness… I was using a timer for a while and kind of forgot about it. It really helped. Thanks for the reminder. I’m glad to hear the Dot video is helping you!
Hi! I’ve learned that John is no longer with IHC. He decided to open an independent office. If you ever decide you’d like to see him, let me know and I can send you his new email address. His office is in Orem.
@@TowardsASimpleLife thank you. I got COVID three weeks ago for the first time. I have MCAS, histamine intolerance and EDS. I’ve never felt such fatigue in my life. I recognize I’m at risk for long COVID. I’m trying to be proactive by learning how to manage the fatigue.
@chandrad951 That’a great! When I got Covid, people were recommending something else and it ended up making me worse. I wish I had known about the dots/energy management then. Maybe it would have gone better for me. I’m so glad you found this. Wishing you the best!
@@TowardsASimpleLifehello again. Can you please tell me his address? My PCP is referring me to the LC clinic at U of U. I had hoped to avoid this, but here I am.
Your story is so similar to mine! I'm mid twenties and it hit me in university. Trying to get better with no income or savings meant I had to live in a van for nearly 3 years. This seems revolutionary. Thank you so much
So sorry that you've been through this. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. It's amazing that such a simple thing - tracking how you feel with dots - could help so much. I guess it's because it's so easy to really pay attention to ourselves.
Hola. People dont realize how bad covid affects ur cognitive abilities. Ive been feeling yellow for the last 2 weeks. I believe it has everything to do with the heat. Ur bedding is so cheerful. This video is going to help so many people. Self awareness is a super power. We all need these essentials. Have a great weekend.
So true! Covid does so much more to some people that people understand. Paxolid was a blessing when I got Covid the last time. It even helped my Long Covid improve. The whole experience, and the dots, taught me so much. Yes, self-awareness is a superpower!
Thank you so very much for sharing this technique. I have tried so many and none of them have worked. This makes perfect sense and is simple. You mentioned that you had thrown away your handouts from your therapist. Perhaps he would allow you to share the handouts with us or post them himself. The handouts may help us in determining where we are in yellow/red. I also have fibromyalgia and find I get mentally overwhelmed easily on my harder days. A consistent standard would be helpful. I do love your clear explanation and you have a wonderful demeanor/personality. I am so glad I found your channel.
You're so very welcome! I wish I could share the handouts (I really don't have them, because I threw them away quite awhile ago,) but they were his copyrighted information, so I really couldn't even share them if I still had them. The best way to get going with the DOTS is to just start and then, pay attention to how you feel. The more you log your state - being consistent - the easier it will get to tell how you are feeling and will know when it is time to stop and rest and when it's okay to do things. You'll get so you know when you are yellow/red/purple after you've logged for awhile. Promise. You'll also get better at figuring out what you can do to rest. I learned that just sitting and watching TV wasn't necessarily the answer for me. If you have a spouse or someone you live with, you could have them watch the video so they know what you mean when you start saying things like, "I'm in the yellow." All I have to do is say, "I'm in the yellow," and everyone knows they need to leave me alone because the sooner I rest, the sooner I'll be back in green and nobody wants me to get down in red and purple if they can help it. It gives you a common language rather than just saying, "I don't feel well," or "I'm having a bad day." I mean, what does that mean? But saying, "I'm in the yellow," or "I'm in the red," feels substantial. Hope that helps!
Soooo interesting. I have way too many responsibilities and too many expectations of myself. I enter red all of the time. I have too much traveling in my mind and it doesn’t stop. Thankfully I have seen some of my patterns and make myself to take breaks, but somehow I need to limit my expectations. Very much enjoyed this video.
I'm so glad! It is helpful to me to know where I am. I still have Fibro flares and don't feel good, but the dots have helped me know what to do to get pas them. I'm very grateful that John taught me to do this. So happy to pass it along to you!
I’m usually in yellow , red, and purple a lot because I have kids. I cannot just decide to stop cooking food because I’ve been homeschooling all day and am in red. I can schedule in more breaks and maybe get my husband to help me more though.
Oh boy... I relate to what you've said. I raised 4 kids and homeschooled them for a couple of years. It was intense! Your idea to schedule in some breaks and get your husband to help you more is a good one. You might also want to have him watch this video so he will know about the green, yellow, red, and purple states. I've found it is so much better to tell my husband that I'm in the "yellow" than to just say "I am too tired," or "I don't feel well," because, really... what does tired or not feeling well mean? Having a way to explain how you feel in a concrete way is so helpful. It clears up the communication so much.
I’ve never heard of Killer Color Dits, but I can relate to this idea; it’s how I’ve been able to keep my sanity. I grew up very much like you, always able to accomplish a lot & stay focused, etc. Aging, illness, grief, loss of a job or career, and other life issues or unresolved trauma can flip a switch that makes our old self almost seem like a different person. Now if I need to stop and take a walk, draw a picture, pet the dog - whatever I really enjoy AT THAT MOMENT - I do it without apology. It is self-renewal. Our tank gets empty from endless energy output and it takes more than food and sleep to fill it!
You’re so right. It does take more than food to fill our tank. I relate to the “flipping the switch” sentiment. When I was young, I couldn’t have imagined everything that happened to me and to life tends to change with each new turn in the road.
Thank you for this! I’m new to the channel. Here’s my experience in hopes it helps someone else to feel less alone. I’ve always had ADHD, and depression as a result (at least partially.) I’ve always pushed myself hard during my “good times”, then I crash really HARD, physically and emotionally. I get headaches that last for days, muscle pain, exhaustion (the kind where getting food and showering is too much, and I get out of breath easily) which all leads to deep depression. I did get COVID at least once (one of the less serious strains.) For me it was like the flu, so I didn’t consider that to be a factor in my worsening symptoms, but I am now rethinking that. I have a way of downplaying my issues, especially when I compare myself to others that have things worse. Also, we had a very difficult move and many family crisis that have contributed to stresses on my body and brain. I’ve come to feel more and more brain dead and useless over the last few years. I’m on purple and red A LOT, leading to feelings of guilt, and constantly feeling obligated to apologize for my “deficits.” I’m in a complete fog most of the time, but have people depending on me, so I really beat myself up for not being more available for them. I’ve come to heavily depend on my adhd meds for the brief window of productivity that they give me (some days) and also caffeine and sugar. This obviously leads to worse cycles of overdoing it and then crashing and sometimes (more so recently) incapacitating anxiety. I refuse to up my meds, so I have to take frequent breaks from them (every few days) or I build up a tolerance. I’m going to try this method because, I now realize that the second I get to yellow, I start pushing. I’m also going to save this video as a way to explain my situation to others. It’s so hard with these “invisible” illnesses to feel “validated” and to NOT feel like I’m just making it all up. I’ve never had a doctor that has really taken the time to help me, and honestly I have stopped trying. I’m too tired and overwhelmed to even go to the doctor, if that makes any sense. ..especially if they are just going to tell me again that the tests are normal and i just need to try different depression meds. One Dr actually laughed at me years ago and gave me a sheet of paper with stretching exercises when I asked about fibromyalgia. That’s why I wanted to leave this (extremely long 😅) comment, in case my experience helps someone else to understand that,maybe, it isn’t all in their head. I have a tiny glimmer of hope again, when it comes to managing my energy, so thank you. And by the way, watching this video and writing this comment has exhausted me, lol. That’s how wrecked my brain has become. But there’s always hope, right!💪😁 To the creator of this channel, and anyone else in a similar situation, hang in there! You’re not alone!🥰
I'm sure you will have helped many people. There are so many out there feeling that way. I'm sorry that doctor was such an idiot about your Fibromyalgia. That's cruel and just shows his ignorance. If he was following the research, he'd know better. I'm grateful that John taught me this and it's an honor to be able to help other by sharing it. Thank you so much for taking the time to share with us!
@@TowardsASimpleLife Thank you for taking the time to read my comment and reply! I subscribed after watching this video and am going to be working through your other videos. Thanks for putting yourself out there and sharing what works for you!
I love the description of bugs vs forest fire! It makes so much sense. Thank you, too, for this method. My health/fibro has not been great. It is such a good idea to start dealing with things at the yellow stage, rather than pushing through until we can’t. I have always hated the need to pace myself. This is such a sensible way (for me) to do it. Thank you! (And thank you, John.) Do you have more fibro ideas and tips on your channel? Where can I find them, please?
Isn't that great? John really cleared things up for me with that one and best of all, other people understand what happened to me when I tell them about it. I wish I'd learned to pace myself earlier, but I still have my flares. I'm just coming out of a 5-day one. It would have lasted longer if I hadn't recognized what was going on so I could do something about it. Fibro is such a part of my life, and I talk about it often (and how it is affecting me right then) that I would say you may related to most of the videos I've posted since the end of December. You can tell which ones they are because the thumbnails dramatically changed and there is red text on all of them. Real life is going on here. :-)
Thank you so much for taking the time (and energy!) to make this detailed video! It was very helpful - and I'm thankful that it helped (helps) you, too. Appreciate it! Good video.
You’re so welcome Deb! I’m glad it will be helpful you. It has helped me so much that it’s difficult to express. It’s a blessing to you. Thanks for your support!
I am feeling soo very blessed to have been gifted 💝 your kindness❣️ Thank you for your journey and for sharing it with us. So thankful for John’s too! 🤗
Oh yea… I need to do this. I have days where i wear myself out and can’t do anything for the next day and sometimes days after that. This is a great idea.
I have fibromyalgia and work a very stressful job in mental health. Just getting over COVID. This was both interesting and upsetting because I recognize that I live mainly in yellow and red dipping into the purple several times a month. Green is pretty rare.
Oh man… my heart goes out to you. So tough. I hope it’s helpful some that the dots will give you a language to think about and communicate how you are feeling. It’s done that for me. So now, instead of just telling my husband “I don’t feel good,” I can say “I’m feeling yellow” and he knows just what I mean. And I know what I mean by that. I had no idea how to explain how I felt before I met John. I hope you can find some way to take care of yourself when you need a break.
@@TowardsASimpleLife thank you. I'm going to try it out. Might show me how to make some changes. My son has fibromyalgia and juvenile rheumatoid arthritis so he is very understanding and supportive. Glad you have found a way to help your husband understand
Pushing through when you actually have COVID really brings the long COVID symptoms to your body. Thanks for this great system to heed the body's wisdom!
Sometimes that is very true. When I got Covid (and early Long Covid), they were giving really bad advice and reommending these programs of improvement to work your brain. All that happened for me is that I blew my brain up (although, it may have happened anyway). I ended up getting Covid again last fall and my doctor gave me Palovid for it. It helped me quite a bit because it killed some virus cells that had been hanging around. I've read that it has helped other people with Long Covid. It did seem to stop it, but it didn't repair the damage. The DOTS help as much as anything I've tried and I'm learning some work-arounds for other things.
This was awesome . I am also autistic like another commentor I have been in a state of burnout for a long time . Pushing myself for to long . Thank you for the information .. I remember spirograph too .
Love this!! Killer dots are so creatively useful! Also, I’m using an energy tracker called Visible. It job is to make invisible, illness, visible, but for me, it helps with pacing and also shows me which activities really take a lot out of me. I was shocked to see how much mental work saps my system even more than physical! I’m not affiliated with them, just wanted to share, because it’s another tool!
Thank you so much for this video!!!! I’m in my 30s and I got long covid in 2022 and it’s been quite the life altering experience!! Energy pacing has been key and I think I will add this method to my regiment as well 😊thank you!!!
This video made me want to cry tears of thankfulness. It was one of the most helpful and powerful things I’ve ever heard! When I caught Covid almost two years ago, it triggered fibromyalgia in my body. I’ve been struggling and feeling super alone ever since about this journey. Your video made me feel seen and not so alone. Thank you. I will start first thing tomorrow morning. Today was a 🔴 so praying a good night sleep will get me in the right direction.
I’m so grateful to have heard from you. It means a great deal to me to know that the video has helped you. John would be so pleased. It does sound like we have a few things in common. I’m so sorry that you’ve had the Covid/Fibro struggle too. It’s so real. What you have been going through is real. If you have any questions, just let me know and I’ll do my best to answer them.
Alex Howard has a lot of resources that might be worth checking out. He runs the Optimum Health Clinic in London, but these lots of other stuff online, some of it free. Good luck 💞
I really do need this. July 4 4 AM I was at the ER very high blood pressure trembling. When I left, I was healthy according to the doctor. it took a day and the Internet to realize I had had an anxiety attack. I definitely will be checking other episodes
I’m so glad it was helpful to you. I think this method could help. It takes a little bit to get used to logging and you might forget sometimes, but just reconstruct what you can remember and move forward. Any record you make will be helpful to you. I’m starting to use the method to log something else, to see if it can get me past a problem. If it does, I’m going to do another video about what happened. It will be months before I know though. Thanks for saying hello!
Thank you, this was so helpful. I'm going to implement it and look for what my "stressors" are with my dots. Thank you for sharing what you have learned so that we can find help too. 😊
Love this simple idea . . . my brain is very taxed working at a crazy start up where they change the game plan almost every week. Very exhausting! My brain is tired with all the constant changes. I don't get down on myself because even the 30yr olds are brain tired and just don't work as hard. lol
Wow, that sounds exhausting. I actually grew a start-up and it was a crazy time. I don't think I have the physical ability to do that now. I wish I'd know about the DOTS method then, though. I drove myself so hard that I got sick over and over and over... Yeah... don't get down on yourself.
Thanks Connie!! It sure helps me. Eventually I got to the point where I don’t have to mark up the calendar, but it took quite a while. I guess I’m a slow learner about myself. But now, everyone in the family knows what I mean if I say I’m in the yellow. Occasionally, Gary will tell me I’m pushing myself into red and I need to stop now. It makes it so much easier to communicate where I am with my health without anyone getting bugged about it. They would lots sooner help me stay in the green as much as possible.
Thank you for this. I have fibromyalgia, too, along with other health issues. I think these killer dots will help me. I easily cross over from yellow to red, and I'd like to boost my awareness of yellow so I can decrease going into red.
Oh, I’m so glad to hear that it might help you! It has made such a difference to me because I learned that I regularly blasted myself into yellow and then ignored it and went red. Then I’d crash for days or weeks. I still have problems like getting ill really affects me as does extreme weather changes (drops in pressure are awful), but overall, I would say that the DOTS make me and my family more patient with my reality. So glad to talk to you!
Thanks for sharing your strategies!! I have been using journaling to help manage my life, but had not thought to monitor my energy levels throughout the day. This makes so much sense to me!! Definitely adding this idea to my routine. For the longest time all I could do was track what I was doing without understanding the links between my activity and my results. The bullet journal method has gotten me quite a long way, but now I have killer dots too! I’ve been using Kuretake dot markers in a lot of different ways as I journal, and here’s a great addition!! Off to play with color in my journal, whee!!
You've made good points about taking breaks and not feeling guilty for taking care of yourself. I'll definitely check in with myself more often because of it. I won't do tne jounaling because I really don't want to put extra focus on what I 'can't' or 'shouldn't' do. I believe what you focus on is what you get more of, like attracts like, sort if thing. Focusing on too many yellow/red/purple dots will beget more if the same -ymmmv. I'll just remind myself I can continue my task after a break or the next day if need be and it isn't procrastination. Instead, it's taking care of my health. Thank you for some extra insight and management.
I think that maybe I didn’t explain the journaling well. I just wrote down the activities I did which enabled me to look back and remember what happened. Then I started to see patterns. It wasn’t a record of what I can’t or shouldn’t do. Instead, I learned what I can’t or shouldn’t do when I am fatigued or sick, because I hadn’t been taking care of myself well. I tend to forget from day to day what happens and what I did. I started to see that so often, I had ignored my body and had done too much and made myself worse. The logging was important to help me respect myself more. I don’t agree that focusing too much on /yellow/red/purple begets more. This is not obsessing on colors. It is educating yourself. Remember: I had Long Covid. I was very sick. Instead of resting and caring for myself. I had seriously overdone it which made me much worse. This is why there was such a long period of red and purple. It was not an obsession. It was a real illness that needed to be respected. Seeing the colors taught me a lot and helped motivate me to take better care of myself which eventually moves me back to green. It is not understanding yourself that makes things worse and the dots method helped trained me to respect the messages my body was giving me. For instance, I came down with a cold this week. I caught it at a restaurant. I have learned that if I want to get over viruses faster, I have to respect my body and give it time required to heal. I cannot rush it because rushing it actually extends the recovery period. My cognitive therapist watched this video and he said that he is astonished at the improvement I have made. The dots method was key. I learned it so well that I don’t have to make a log anymore because it taught me to listen and honor my body. Whenever I feel fatigue begin, I listen and take a break. It doesn’t take long for me to bounce back and I can go back to activity. I hope that helps!
I use grease pencils to mark my calendar. They show up brightly & are very easy to mark the paper but don't bleed through or smear. ❤ I couldn't find purple ones so I use green, yellow, red & blue. If I can't find blue, I'll use black. Now I'm going to try the Killer Dots instead of writing everything out. 😊
@TowardsASimpleLife Thanks! 🥰 I have a whiteboard & a paper calendar in the hallway. I also have a lot of glass surfaces & mirrors where I can leave notes if needed so everyone will see them ☺️ They write smooth on most surfaces (glass, metal, paper, plastic & even wood).
I'm so glad! My favorite part is that I understand what is happening to me and can take breaks and slow down when I need to without feeling guilty. I know the ultimately, this is the fastest way back to green. It’s great to talk to you.
I’m so glad it will be helpful to you. I’m grateful that John taught it to me and happy I can share my experience with others. Thanks for letting me know!
Just stumbled across your video, I’am currently struggling with long covid & dysautonomia almost 3years ! I found this video very helpful and informative, thank you
Hi! I’m so glad it’s helpful to you. 3 years is a long time. It truly helped me - made such a big difference. Life isn’t perfect, but it’s better than it was there for a while. Learning how to do this has been key.
I have had to learn to stop doing all of something just to get it done, because i have severe low back pain plus all over body pain, so big chores like sweeping the pool, i decide before hand what half i will do, do that half and just stop, might be break time, then either later that day or the next day, do the other half. I always say it's better than it was, or it's more done than it was.
![Felix "Unfair" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Oswujxm2Ag0/mqdefault.jpg)
I'm so happy you're here. I so EXCITED to tell you about this because it absolutely changed my life. I needed this so badly and consider it a "God thing" that I know about it now. I'd love to hear what you think? And how's your week going?
Hi there, thank you for sharing this technique, I am going to try it out and see if I can get my partner to start using it. We are both ADHDers (late diagnosed) and we struggle to manage our energy well. I wanted to share something with you because you talk about having Fibromyalgia. I was active in a large Peri/Menopause FB group a couple of years ago and a number of women who had Fibromyalgia started talking about how their symptoms dramatically improved and even disappeared after starting HRT, one woman started HRT on purpose as a friend had seen this and told her and she said the relief was almost instantaneous. I told my friend who had been suffering with Fibromyalgia symptoms for a decade and she was hugely sceptical but as she was also having Peri type symptoms she decided to start HRT. She didn't want to admit it so she kept shtum for a couple of months but then wrote a long post for the group about how she saw almost instant relief too and that most of her FM symptoms were gone and had stayed gone. It may be that some women are getting misdiagnosed with FM when actually it is Peri, or it could be that FM is caused by Peri, who knows. There also has been some discussion about Long Covid symptoms being improved when on HRT but I have less anecdotal evidence on that. Anyway, I just thought you might be interested if you are not on HRT, it might be worth you trying it. Even if you are long past going into Menopause you can still start HRT at any point in life theoretically, you just need to find a Menopause specialist who is trained in *Regulated *Body-Identical HRT (rBHRT) and NOT *Compounded *Bio-Identical HRT (cBHRT). Even if you no longer have a uterus you can still benefit from taking oral systemic micronised true Progesterone (Utrogestan is the brand name in most countries) and transdermal Oestrogen is a must for all women. Check out the Balance Menopause website for science based information on everything Peri/Meno and HRT that challenges the misinformation and myths that are so prevalent. It is worth noting that unfortunately most doctors, even OBGYNs etc are woefully under trained and misinformed about Per/Meno and HRT so please don't rely on what they have told you previously, you really need to see a trained Menopause specialist, preferably one who is experienced treating women with FM and complex medical history such as yours. I hope this is helpful.
How often each day do you "check in" with yourself?
@@cuppajoylady I’ve been doing this long enough that I am automatically checking in with myself all day. For a long time - when I was still having to use the calendar - I checked in and marked it 4-5 times a day. If I ever start noticing that things are sliding backwards. I will use the calendar again. Hope that helps!
Less things less work. After getting rid of unnecessary, accumulated things I enjoy the simple housework.
@skulljaden3187 so true!
I took notes so I figured I'd post them here in case anyone else would like them.
Check in with yourself throughout the day (ideally 4 or 5 times a day). At that moment, notice your energy level and record it with a colored dot:
_Green_
- feeling good and like you can do things
- ideal for getting things done
_Yellow_
- starting to get tired in your brain, body, or emotionally
- often we are tempted to push through this zone
- ideal time to take a break:
- short walk
- coloring in a coloring book
- activities where you can "turn your brain off" or your mind can wander aimlessly
- taking a break closer to the onset of this level can mean that you recharge in a shorter amount of time
_Red_
- stop!
- feeling exhausted, hard to be around other people, low amounts of patience
- feeling like you can't handle even one more thing
_Purple_
- really unwell
- depression
- suicidal thoughts may appear
- unable to take care of basic life tasks, like showering and eating
- make basic life tasks as easy to accomplish as possible (ex: baby wipes "shower", ready-made food and snacks)
- don't guilt yourself in this state! give yourself permission to take care of yourself
This was very kind of you to do. Hope it helps others as they are inspired to start using the dots method after watching the video and hearing my story. Thanks!
Killer dots...Genius...😅😅😅
@@jenniferparkinson9411 😀
COLORED dots. Thank you so much for typing this list! I've written it down for myself, writing the color name in that color🎉😊. May we all take better care of ourselves and be well! God bless us in Jesus' name, amen!
@@jenniferparkinson9411COLORED DOTS because words have power and our subconscious is always listening. Keep words positive for our own good. Be well!
Anyone else feel purple but force themselves to keep going because everyone expects you to? That has been my life. How wonderful it would be to be allowed to just REST. Just rest.
I spent too much time during my life doing that. It’s no wonder I ended up collapsing for a while. I wish I had known about the spots earlier, but am grateful I know about them now.
Boundaries ❤
@@kathleengrieci2539what she👆said.
That's how I live most of the time. On the outside we look fine so people don't believe we're unwell and unable to keep going and the comments reminding you that you didn't get much done are sole destroying, so I keep pushing myself to prove that I'm not lazy but then I feel worse. Now that I have young kids, I'm convinced that I'm going to die from exhaustion soon. Even if I give myself permission to stop and rest, I cannot actually rest because I can hear the comments playing in my head about how I could be doing something useful instead of laying on the sofa so I end up getting up and doing work again. I wish I could find a way to just switch off for a while
So sorry you are going through this! It is so hard to have young children. I remember feeling like I got up in the morning and ran all day long until I collapsed into bed at night. I know it might not help much right now, but the physical demands will lesson in time. Then the kids are demanding emotionally, but at least you’ll be able to sleep longer in the morning and you won’t have to watch them every second.
Would it be possible for your husband to watch them for a while each week so that you can get away and rest a bit. Maybe even just sit in your car alone and decompress.
We believe you. We know how it is for people to misjudge us. I hope you can get to the point where you can dump their wrong thinking and be more settled in your knowledge that you ARE doing the best you can under the circumstances.
Have you ever heard of thought replacement? When you catch yourself thinking harsh things about yourself, you immediately replace it with something like, “I am doing what I can and I’m proud of myself for that. I have hope for the future and right now, I am going to accept myself. I am loved, lovable, and loving.” Things like that.
There are some really good flip cards by Louse Hay that I have used. They are called “Power Thought Cards.” Beautiful and fun to look at. They have hopeful, positive thoughts on them that will build you up. I have used them in the past to help me replace negative thinking about myself and it really works. I have even picked out some and stuck them to the wall or mirror so that I saw them all the time. They worked amazingly well.
You can get them on Amazon. You’ll be able to narrow down and pick out some that feel like you need them most right now. I read them out loud twice a day. Then you may find that you need some different ones. (I really should include them in a video!)
Hope that helps!
As a school teacher, I feel like I live my life in a seesaw of yellow and red The last couple of years I've been feeling so burned out, bursting into tears for no apparent reason. I have had many sick days, but I won't go and see my doctor. Since Friday I think I'm now in purple. Haven't showered now for days. I've now decided that on Monday I'm going to see my doctor.
Oh my goodness… yes. I think you should see your doctor. I was a school teacher and it did get tiring, but not to the level you are talking about. I hope you can get some answers!
I was a school teacher too. I loved that job. I had to quit. I mourned it so badly though. I'm a really bad case though - 90% bedridden. I'm grateful to be able to find others to tell this too who get it. Thank you ladies! And I wish the best of health for both of you.
I just found out im autistic and that autistic burnout has been happening for years. Trying to get over it. This seems very useful. I feel guilty for not being able to do things, like everyone else.
I’m so glad it will be helpful to you!!
I'm not sure if I have something (I suspect ADHD, my brothers were tested but I was expected to get over stuff and just do things). I feel exactly the same as you. I'm trying my best, and that's all you can do. Especially when depression happens, that makes it even harder☹️ Hang in there, friend; you're worth it!🫂
👍❤️
I hope that you can find a way to accept that you are doing the best you can do. I have depression, anxiety, ADHD, and probably a touch of OCD. I struggle with motivation and energy every single day, so I understand. Do the best that you can do and then praise yourself for doing it. The best you can do is all that you can do, and it's enough.
I was thinking this same thing
Killer dots is more fun. I’m 73 and have learned that each day I start with only a certain amount of energy and must decide what to spend it on. Major surgery on my digestive system in my 20’s with long term effects, then fibromyalgia, chronic anemia, and Covid twice for sure have really impacted my wellbeing. I’ve been doing something similar to your coloured dots for years using my kitchen calendar. I use coloured pens, pencils and highlighters and can look back on my weeks and months and see how I’ve done. I also use emojis sometimes to express myself. Instead of a journal, I use the calendar to mark down notable activities, events and people I met or talked to. I like your coloured dots though as a more concise way to keep track of myself on each day. It will take up less room on my calendar.
I bet your calendar would be a fascinating read! I’m so glad to hear the killer dots will help you with it. 🟢🟡🔴🟣
any advice for sleep difficulties and "waking up" tired, not refreshed
I have a few tips in that video with 53 tips. But sleep can be a struggle. Have you ever been tested for sleep apnea or reflux? I have to take sleep medication because it’s common for people with Fibro to have sleep problems. Working on sleep quality is the top thing they do. I also find I am extremely sensitive to sound and light and sometimes I get woken up by odd things - even the air conditioner coming on or someone coming in the front door (the door pops) can be a problem.
I love this method. Most days I try to push myself but then I end up in red and purple. I wake most days in yellow. But I had a realization from this video. Yesterday I felt like I had a bit of a head cold coming on and I went into what I call taking care of me mode. I made myself soup and a cup of cocoa (yes in the summer). I enjoyed it and took the day slow doing something that wasn't on a to do list. After most of the day went by I got up and told my hubby I was going to get some work done because I was feeling better. Your video made me realize I need to do selfcare everyday when I start to get tired not just when I am sick.
I'm so happy to hear that this is helping you. It's made such a great difference in my life. I'll always be grateful to John for teaching it to me. I'm glad I could share it with you.
This is such a good toolset to give someone at the beginning of chronic fatigue or neurodivergent burnout.
I've learned how to do this intuitively over the last four years, but it would have made a world of difference if, when I went to the hospital a month after COVID, the doctor had handed me this.
Instead, no one knew what to do because at the time, no one was talking about post-viral illness except the people who had it. It was a year and a half before I even learned that ME/CFS existed and that I could learn from patients who'd been through this much longer than I. It took another year and a half before I learned how to pace myself reliably.
I can't imagine how much faster I might've started to improve if my wife had been able to ask me every several hours (when I didn't have the cognitive capacity to do it myself), "what color are you feeling?"
Edited to add: Oh my gosh, I feel so similarly to what you said at the end. I'm not glad I got Long COVID. It took so much from my life. And yet...I had no capacity to listen to my body before. I had no capacity to let myself rest and no capacity to prevent myself from constantly burning out and working through it. For all that Long COVID has taken from me, it has at least given me that.
I’m so glad to hear that it going to be helpful. John made such a difference in my life when he taught this to me. I still have to use it every single day because it is a continual challenge to maintain my health and energy. It’s so up and down but, as you said, being able to communicate which color-state I am is so helpful to me and my family. Today is an “orange” day for me. Not quite red but more than yellow.
@@TowardsASimpleLife We call it Radical Resting and it takes real discipline to do it.
@ I like that name.
@@TowardsASimpleLife Me too.
There's Radical Acceptance and
Radical Resting
and we need it all.
The bedspread is cheerful.
Thanks! I love it. I get it out every summer. ☀️
Was thinking the same thing. I love the pattern so cute 🥰
@@TowardsASimpleLife I had to watch because I have that same bedspread for the summer!
@marthapeake7109 Isn’t it great? I bought mine 4-5 years ago and get it out every summer. I always look forward to it. 😀
@@TowardsASimpleLifeIt looks brand new though, how do you manage to keep things in pristine condition 😅😊
can't thank you enough for this. this has been working AMAZINGLY for me (and my boyfriend). We now actively tell each other when we are feeling green, yellow, red, or purple. we don't ask each other to do anything if we aren't green. we basically have a house chore system where we both help out, but don't expect each other to do anything while yellow, and definitely not red. purple is drop everything and make sure the other person is okay and keep checking on them. he told me he was feeling stressed and I didn't think it was that bad until he added on that he was purple. then I understood how bad he meant it was. so it has been helping a lot with communication AND understanding myself. also, one of the main helpful things is telling each other while out that we are starting to go to yellow. that means it is time to go home. even if we had more planned we are done.
This is so awesome! Thanks for following up and letting me know it’s working so well for you. I love this!
I just found you as I sat waiting for dawn. I have fibro, post polio and just plain age and was calling myself 'lazy' because I couldn't get things done. You made me see I wasn't lazy, but most of my days are in the yellow stage. At best, yellow green. But that's ok. I need the rest and now I can do it without guilt! Thank you!
I'm so glad you found that video and that it was helpful. That's wonderful. I hope you have a great weekend!
I've just taken a shower and am in yellow, verging on red. In a tricky transition and staying with my parents, which is not so great at the age of 54 and there's a lot of stress. I am too good at covering up how I honestly feel and they don't like to acknowledge I'm not well. I spend a lot of time in my room, trying to get back to a green, or even a yellow, then engage with them again and retreat to recover.
It's a very useful video - thank you! I've been pushed to purple and red too many times over the past eighteen months and I feel totally validated by this. At least insanity is one less thing to stress about!
I'm so glad it has helped you. Tracking your energy states will help you. When I was learning to do it, I taught my family members what the colors meant and then, over time, I could say to them, "I better rest because I'm in the yellow and I can tell that if I don't, I'll end up in the red." It became a signal to them that you do need to rest and they got more and more supportive. It gave us a langue to communicate with and over time, they stopped thinking that I was exaggerating. Now, if I tell my husband that I'm sliding into red (I sometimes say "orange", because I'm past yellow but not quite to red," he'll firmly tell me to go rest. They have learned that the more I honor yellow, the faster I am back in the green and it makes a difference to all of it. I hope that your parents can get it. It could make a big difference for all of you!
Taking a walk or sitting outside and looking at nature helps recover energy. Happy music and funny TV shows. ❤
I feel for you. I've been in this situation in my fifties and it's tough. From my experience, I would say focus as much as you can (gently, without forcing) on any friendships or interests you have that make you feel good about yourself and boost your confidence, that give you a healthy sense of yourself and your place in the world. Someone above mentioned looking at nature, funny films... whatever you have access to and helps. Looking back, I can see that I didn't do enough of this, I was so bogged down in the situation, health problems, difficult transition and aware that my parents were worried about me and didn't know how to help.... disempowering to my sense of myself as an adult. With some help from a wonderful local healer I was eventually able to move on.
Remember, this situation doesn't make you any less of who you are, even if it might feel like it. Be proud of who you are and what you've accomplished and coped with in your life, even if no one else sees those things. I find being around parents/ family can make me feel invisible... putting a hand on my heart, the other one on my belly, helps me to re centre and give myself some love.
You'll find a way through this. My heart is with you, I wish you strength and lots and lots of tender self-care 💞🌹
@@laurenlauren4239 This is great advice.
@@laurenlauren4239 Thank you for your supportive words. My parents did indeed betray me through lack of trust shortly after writing this, but my sister came through for me.
I am in a challenging financial situation which triggers a lot of shame, and I've been trying to find somewhere to live and coming up against my fears and shame...and somehow taking them on and turning it all around.
The result is that I am soon to move into a place of my own, despite my worries, the right little property popped up in right timing, all the referencing checks went through and I am arranging the tenancy start date.
The next couple of days will be floating around orange, but knowing what I need to move the needle back to green. The thought of having access to all my creative things is what is keeping me going!
It's so nice to hear a success story. Thank you and much love
🤗💕
I have been doing this method organically but I like the idea of colors which can be used to explain your current state to your family without having to tax yourself thinking of the words to explain. This video should be required listening for anyone with a chronic illness.!! Ty
That’s what the colors do for me. Nobody knew what I meant (including me) when I said, “I don’t feel good.” Being able to give them a color has been game changing. I feel so blessed to have met John and am happy that I could pass this along.
There's nothing to feel guilty about when you're taking care of yourself! Really needed to hear this right now, as I'm early in pregnancy struggling with morning (all day) sickness and fatigue and having a hard time getting much of anything done.
Yes, take care of yourself! The sickness will pass, but then, after you have the baby, you'll be so busy it will feel hard to take care of yourself whenever you can. You'll probably have to let your standards drop for awhile, but it's okay. It really is. Sometimes, things are more important that keeping everything shiny and clean. So happy for you about the baby!
This is the absolute BEST pacing advice I’ve ever heard. I have Long Covid and autoimmune disease. My doctor is always telling me to pace, but I had no idea how. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for making this incredibly helpful and informative video about pacing! 🙏💖
I’m so excited that it will help you! John did me such a favor by teaching me this and I’m happy I could pass it along to you. 😀
I'm so happy to hear doctors are finally telling people to PACE. I can't believe it! I never thought I'd hear this in my lifetime.
- lifelong ME and Fibro sufferer (probably long COVID now too)
I had three years of CBT trauma therapy after my 30 year abusive marriage ended. This aligns so much with the tools that I’m already using some of which I forget to use from time to time and things slip into old patterns. Rebuilding my life has been extremely difficult, had Covid in the midst of it all and having to start a career at 60. Taking care of an elderly mother, my children’s lives being in turmoil and my grandchildren, I tend to not take care of myself as much as I should. I too push through, where I end up in purple, a terrifying place to get to and SO challenging to come out of. This is a gift from God and an answer to prayer. Thank you so much!
You certainly have had some large challenges to deal with! Wow. I am sooo glad this video has been helpful to you. Thank you for letting me know. It’s a blessing to me. I hope you have a nice weekend!
Same here. I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia in 2000. Mom of 8 and the youngest diagnosed with Down Syndrome/Autism, and abusive spouse. I was able to leave the SOB in 2013 with my special needs son and life got better. But because we shared a special needs son, he still didn't leave me alone.
Long story short, I got long-term Covid in January of 2021. However, as I was still recovering, in November of 2022, the ex began a legal nightmare that still isn't resolved today (he's stringing it out) and I've been in purple since then.
Now, my 8 kids are grown adults with the mom of 8 grown adult children, with 7 spouses or SO, and 14-going-on-16, Grands.
I'm so used to pushing myself but I physically cannot push myself any more. Even my 90 year old mother knows that.
But in the midst of this legal battle, I work when my son's here (3 weeks out of the month and every other weekend) and do absolutely nothing the week/weekends he's gone.
That's what I'm down to.
And it is a scary place to be.
Thank you for sharing so honestly.
I can relate so much with what you shared, I immediately subscribed and watched the video again.
@dianefine7081 I’m so sorry about all you’ve been through. So many challenges and courage required to keep going. You’re very brave. It does sound like we have some things in common. I’m so glad you’re here!
@@TowardsASimpleLife thank you! I'm so happy to be here!
I love this idea, but it’s so hard when you’re a mom and your kids need you every minute.
You' re right - it's so hard. I remember that when my kids were small, I felt like I got up and ran all day long until I collapsed into bed at night. It was grueling. And when they are in certain time periods, it is just the way it is. They can't be ignored.
In looking back at that time period, I'm wondering if part of my problems was that I can get kind of perfectionistic and hard on myself sometimes. I think I may have had too high of standards for myself. (Does that sound weird?) I think I'm improving here and, actually the dots have helped because they taught me to listen to body, but sometimes I still push myself harder than I should. I think it's a process to learn to do well, but not do so well that you harm yourself. What is that about the oxygen on the plane? You have to put it on yourself before you help others?
I remember talking to my father about this very thing when my kids were small. I was telling him how exhausted I was and that I couldn't do any more and I felt bad about it. He said, "Don't run faster than you are able." He was a wise man. I'll never forget that moment.
This reminds me of a story that was told about Susanna, Wesley, mother of Charles Wesley. If I recall the story, correctly (no guarantees on that these days 😂😂😂), She had a large number of children, but they all knew to give her some peace and quiet when she put her apron over her face and head. That was her quiet time for prayer and meditation, and a little peace and quiet I suspect - a pause from the incessant demands of children. And no doubt prayers that they wouldn’t turn into hooligans when they got older! True or not, Susanna, or not, I love the idea of a mom carving out time, no matter what. If she could do it… Other moms can do it.
On a similar note, other moms have trained their children to not interrupt unless fire, blood or broken glass are involved. Things like that. Same idea but with a thoughtful direction to keep people safe.
@@bitrudder3792 "apron over her head." :-)
@@TowardsASimpleLife Sounds like we gotta start wearing aprons again! 😅
@@shoshanaeri8035 I love aprons! I have a nice collection and wear them all the time. I just didn't think of using them like that. Maybe the next time my grandkids get extra loud, I'll put the one I have on over my head. 🤣
This is frightening! So beautifully simple and like a brain worm, now that I’ve seen it I can no longer pretend! I’m an orange today and was prepared to behave like green, and it pulled me up! The pushing through is such a horrible compulsion but this is going to help me find constructive and kind ways to be in each of the colours.
I have had ME/CFS for thirty years, which has included being bed bound. I am now very active but with good and bad days. This system and the intervals forces us to be honest with ourselves, that’s why it’s frightening, but that’s why it has the potential to be a game changer. Killer coloured dots! I love it. Thank you 🙏🏼 🤩
I’m so glad it will help you. It has made a big impact in my life. I really needed it. Thanks so much for letting me know!
There are no coincidences. Your video came through my feed and I didn’t even read the videos titled. I just clicked to watch on a whim when I saw your kind face.
Oh what nice thing to hear. You’ve made me smile. Thanks so much for saying hello!
@@TowardsASimpleLife I don’t know how YT algorithms knew that I needed to learn and implement the dots method in my life because I’ve never searched or watched a video on this topic. What you described you have gone through with long C19…its what I’m experiencing currently. Your words hit deep. I’ve been red/purple for too long. I need to give myself more Grace and thanks to your kindness to help people out with your videos, I now have better tools to cope. I’ve already implemented the dots, currently purple and passing dinner off to my husband so I don’t have a meltdown. I am a firm believer in acknowledging and giving thanks to people for their good work and helping others out of the kindness of their hearts . 😊
Isn’t it neat how knowing about the Dots gives you a language to let you communicate with yourself and others about how you are feeling? It has been critical to my own life and has made such a difference with helping my family understand where I am and what I need to do. I’m so glad it is helping you too. John has blessed both of us!
This kind of reminds me of the spoon method. I think this theory could help people with adhd a lot from avoiding burnout.
I've heard of the spoon method, but haven't used it. Someone else said that they have been using the spoon method, but this seemed to be a little bit more clear to them. I don't know about that, but I do know I'm glad John taught me how to do this.
@@TowardsASimpleLife I've never heard of anybody actually doing the Spoon Method. It's usually just a way to explain what we're dealing with to other people - as in, you send them the story.
@ interesting!
@@TowardsASimpleLife After I wrote that someone further down in your comments reminded us that you can tell or send the story to someone like that you live with, and then you can tell them you're on your last spoon.
So you can use it. I forgot 'cause I don't use it.
❤ thank you. I needed this, tears are running in a healing way while listening to you. And I love watching, your bed is so lovely decorated, I like colours and flowers. Hope we all get energy back and heal. God bless you ❤
I’m so grateful to hear that the video was helpful to you. It means a lot to me that it was. God bless you too!
Killer Dots is SO much more fun than coloured dots, even though it's not quite right! I've realised that I am spending so much of my time in yellow and nowhere near enough in green. Too much in red and even in purple occasionally, when I have to cancel everything and everyone thinks I'm hopelessly unreliable. What a great way of describing how you are doing and alerting yourself to problems.
Yes, it's not quite right although it did occur to me that being in the red or purple feels like a killer state. Ha! I'm unreliable too. I've finally started to tell people that. I was extremely reliable before I got sick and now I'm not. I feel it's better for them to know that I really do want to go - and will go if I can - but that they shouldn't take it personally if I can't come. I'll be disappointed to. I'm also not reliable around here. My ability to do things is soooo up and down. It takes getting used to. But at least, I have the dots which helps me understand what's going on and when I need to stop back and "cool my jets" for awhile. I'm so glad John taught this to me!
I’m going to have my husband watch this entire video. He hasn’t learned to pace himself as well as I have but he is getting better. God bless you and yours❤️
This really helped me. Hope it helps him too!
I'm glad they're teaching people to PACE finally. I have Fibro too (and ME) and my rheumy and doctor were always yelling at me for gaining weight and not exercising enough and that was back when I could still exercise as a thing. I've got a new rheumy but no primary care doctor will take me now.
Ack. So sorry to hear that. I'm lucky in that my primary care doctor will take care of me, but it helps that I've had it so long that I know how to take care of myself.
@@TowardsASimpleLife That's good. I need a PCP for Rx lotion that helps a great deal with many issues I have and I have to see the Rheumy 4x a year to get my disability. The Rheumies won't Rx the medication I use because it's made in a special kind of pharmacy that makes them no money.
Great video! I also want to say I love the colorful bedroom! I’m sick of the gray and white in so many videos.😊
Thanks! I love color and have it everywhere in my home. I just couldn’t get into the grey and white color scheme. Seeing the colors I love around makes me feel good. So glad you like it too!
Yes the bedspread is beautiful
And the wall
Thanks! I love the paint color so much.
Same here, so inspiring. Gray walls are sad.
This sounds so much like me... I push through and then I can't do anything as I am exhausted. I will monitor myself with this method. Thank you. ❤
That’s what I used to do too! DOTS has really helped me. Glad you’re here!
I’m a long hauler, 3 1/2 years now. This is the absolute best thing I’ve seen on pacing to date. I’m super visual, so to have a visual representation of how i am feeling and be able to color code it to measure is incredibly helpful. I’ve done so much OT and PT and no one has taught anything like this for pacing. Thank you for spending your own spoons to make this helpful video. ❤
Oh, I’m so glad that it is going to be helpful to you. It makes such a difference to me. I still mess up, but I can easily label where I am and know just what to do to get back in the green. And I can easily tell my family how I’m feeling and they get it. So glad I met John and he would be happy to know he helped you too!
@@TowardsASimpleLife may I ask how long you did cognitive rehabilitation? I’m about to start soon. Do you think that was the most helpful for you in recovery?
I was in CT around 9 months. What ended up happening to me was that I got Big C again and was really sick. My doctor gave me Paxlovid and it ended up helping my Long Covid too. I still have the after effects, and probably always will, but I took a leap forward. I don’t know how well I would have done without the Dots because I still use them every single day to assess where I am. (I don’t have to mark a calendar because it’s just part of me now.) For instance, two days ago I had a cleaning thing I had to do that I absolutely had to do and I knew it would be hard on me physically. It seemed to be okay afterward and so I did some other things. I should have stopped. Yesterday morning I felt awful, even a little depressed. I realized I was Orange (a made-up state because sometimes, yellow isn’t right but I’m not quite red). As soon as I realized what was going on, I stopped what I was doing and gave up with the idea that I could do anything other than recover. I’m a little better today. I did some things this morning but quickly hit yellow so I have to stop again. The worst thing is that my brain also goes dead when I’m not green and then I can’t figure out the thing I need to figure out. But I have no choice other than to cool it and wait when this happens to me. As soon as I feel better, I can figure things out. (Trying to plan a future video.) Pacing was the most valuable thing to come out of CT and really, was the thing John and I spent almost all of our time on. I’ve had some other doctors surprised by that answer, but then again, they didn’t know about the Dots until I told them about it. I tell them “pacing is everything.” When you are an “overachiever” like I am, it is so hard to accept you just can’t keep pushing through and do everything you can think up. I finally did accept it. This is my life. It’s okay. I hope this helps!
@@TowardsASimpleLife so sorry to hear you got the big C again! It’s just awful! Your reply is so helpful. Thank you for sharing your experience. I can relate SO MUCH to everything you said. I’m very similar. When I’ve depleted by batteries I can’t even form sentences. I really try to not get to that stage (purple) but it happens occasionally. I’m so excited to start this dot system to help pace better. So grateful for you sharing your experience. Wishing you many more Green Day’s and continued healing. 🙏🏻✨
@jessicalambert7753 ❤️❤️
OMG, thank you so much for this live-saving resource. I’ve been told by specialist to learn to PACE for the last 5+ and this is he first time it’s actually been explained in a way I find accessible.
I am so glad that it's helping you! That's awesome!!
Yes pacing explained very well
The fact that specialists and doctors know to tell people to PACE is amazing to me. Us ME patients tried for years to get Wikipedia to state this in their page on ME/CFS but to no avail for so long. I personally tried too as well, but they wouldn't listen and they kept pushing more exercise as the solution for us. Finally a few years ago they changed it but I still hear many patients say their doctors remain clueless about it and quite a few of those patients see docs at Stanford who still treat them abysmally.
My choice is Magical dots! Also, since i LOVE the color purple, I'm going to use brown for that stage. Thank you for this! I can see it having a big impact on my fibro/cfs life. 😊❤
I love that you're adapting it. I ended up adding a couple of colors - particularly orange - because sometimes I am tireder than yellow, but not quite red. John thought it was funny, but he said that he's seen other patients do the same thing. I think it's just important that we start listening to ourselves, particularly when we have chronic illnesses. (You know that too!)
I’m so sorry you got sick with that nasty thing and it blasted you like that. Sucks. Blessings to your beautiful human soul, for still doing videos and sharing your message and inspiring insights. Much love ❤
Yeah, not fun. But good things often come out of bad things and meeting such nice people on my channel is one of them!
"Rest without feeling guilty." Oh, how hard that is for me!
Isn’t it strange that we sometimes have such a hard time with the idea of resting?
@@TowardsASimpleLife I'm female and I see what society's expectations are. I can't live up to them anymore, it's just not an option, but I still struggle with the guilt thanks to my mean in-laws I plan on never talking to again.
I can't live without breaks. The to do list will still be ridiculous when I'm dead. I might as well not be dead prematurely because I'm trying to do too much.
This is great! I’m going to remember that.
Oof, that hit me hard! “The to do list will still be there when I’m dead” 😵 Such a good wake up call to prioritize self check-ins 😤👏🏼 And thanks Rozanne for the lovely video ❤️🩹
@joeycrunch I’m so glad you enjoyed it!
It would be fun to do a Happiness check in, using 3 smiley faces, one with a smile, one neutral, one sad mouth. If sad you could ask yourself what would make me smile.
Love your energy dot idea and will start using it.
My issue is when I collapse in a heap I feel guilty that stuff is not getting done so it is a downward spiral.
I like the idea of just doing the essentials.
Thanks for your channel.
Tracking your happiness level along with the dots is such a good idea, because your emotional state can be associated with how your feel physically. I'm so glad you're here! Have you seen my lastest video about the book, "How to keep house while drowning: by KC Davis? It may help you, because you don't need to feel guilty about doing less when you;re not feeling the best. KC is a therapist and she shares what she teaches her clients in the book, who suffer in this way.
You can watch it here:
ruclips.net/video/phQVHQjxGKk/видео.htmlsi=t7GjqbKs3DNSrzwS
You might also want to watch the video about Essentialism. It really helped me start to figure out what I consider essential and what is non-essential (so I don't need to do it.
ruclips.net/video/phQVHQjxGKk/видео.htmlsi=t7GjqbKs3DNSrzwS
I hope that helps!
I’m 5 minutes into your video and nodding my head like I feel understood for the first time in 4 years when the Pandemic struck. I can see the look of non belief when I tell people ….. the Covid experience changed my life and who I am …. The brain change is real. I want to be who I was before …. To do more, be more, and push more. And I feel I appear lazy to others. But I’ve tested positive for COVID this week and I’m stuck in bed being forced to reevaluate my life. Bring on the Sanity of the Killer Dots!
Oh, I'm so glad you found this video! John really helped me so much with the Dots Method and I still use it. Sorry about the new incidence of Covid! Hope you get over it soon. Did you get some Paxlovid? The doctor gave it to me last time I got Covid and it helped. And yes, the brain change is real. I'm a lot better than I was, but there are somethings that I think I'll have to live with. I work to find copying mechanisms to get around them.
HI, I'm a millennial with a boomer work ethic.😆I wish that I had these amazing tips when I had my first MS relapse. It would have saved me much distress! At least I can put these into practice now. Thanks for the excellent video!
I'll have to watch this video in spurts because the brain fog is real today!
You are so welcome. I’m glad it’s going to be helpful to you!
Brain fog is SO real. I hate it when it happens to me. The Dots help me reduce it and get over it faster, but it’s still a thing sometimes. Hope you feel better quickly.
@@TowardsASimpleLife When you were explaining how your brain is affected now on your other video I just came from, I could relate so well. I've been like that my whole life. My mother never has and she thought I just didn't care to pay attention or try. This life has kinda been a nightmare for me. You made me feel so much better about this. It really held me back in so many ways. I never wanted it to show so I stayed really small and totally shut down.
Killer dots is funnier! Watching you today has brought me from yellow to almost green in just 2 videos! Think I'll watch one more and then go take on the rest of my day (in green!!)
💚💚💚💚 love this!
Thanks for this! I’m a school teacher in Australia and this is very much like what our Wellbeing team is implementing with our students, where they are required to check in several times over a day to see what “zone” they are in…It’s a program called Zones of Regulation, and has those colours you mentioned. Great ideas!
This is so interesting to me. What are the odds? I think it’s wonderful that you are teaching the students this. What a wonderful skill to grow up with!
This is so interesting to me. What are the odds? I think it’s wonderful that you are teaching the students this. What a wonderful skill to grow up with!
Great video! I use my celphone timer to take breaks and move around...its helping me not overdo. I am a long Covid hauler and after two years, i am actually changing my mindset from panicky to feeling grateful...i love your Dot process and actually follow it my mind where I am constantly checking up with myself...
I stop when i realise any anxiety or stress setting in...
Oh goodness… I was using a timer for a while and kind of forgot about it. It really helped. Thanks for the reminder. I’m glad to hear the Dot video is helping you!
@@TowardsASimpleLife so glad it helped and am happy to be the reminder the Universe sent you via myself 💝😃
Hello from UT. I’m in Ogden. Thank you for the suggestion about a doctor. It’s good to know that’s an option.
Hi! I’ve learned that John is no longer with IHC. He decided to open an independent office. If you ever decide you’d like to see him, let me know and I can send you his new email address. His office is in Orem.
@@TowardsASimpleLife thank you. I got COVID three weeks ago for the first time. I have MCAS, histamine intolerance and EDS. I’ve never felt such fatigue in my life. I recognize I’m at risk for long COVID. I’m trying to be proactive by learning how to manage the fatigue.
@chandrad951 That’a great! When I got Covid, people were recommending something else and it ended up making me worse. I wish I had known about the dots/energy management then. Maybe it would have gone better for me. I’m so glad you found this. Wishing you the best!
@@TowardsASimpleLifehello again. Can you please tell me his address? My PCP is referring me to the LC clinic at U of U. I had hoped to avoid this, but here I am.
@ Here is his website. Since I made this videov, he has opened his own practice. www.brainandbodyllc.com
One of the most useful videos I have ever watched on RUclips. Thank you.
You’re so welcome. I’m glad it helped!
Your story is so similar to mine! I'm mid twenties and it hit me in university. Trying to get better with no income or savings meant I had to live in a van for nearly 3 years. This seems revolutionary. Thank you so much
So sorry that you've been through this. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. It's amazing that such a simple thing - tracking how you feel with dots - could help so much. I guess it's because it's so easy to really pay attention to ourselves.
Love this!!! I got so much out of this video. It really resonates with me. Thank you so much. And thank you John!
So glad! You are welcome. (And John would be happy to hear it’s going to be helpful to you.)
Bless you for taking the time and energy to bless others❤
You’re so welcome. Thanks for being here!
Hola. People dont realize how bad covid affects ur cognitive abilities. Ive been feeling yellow for the last 2 weeks. I believe it has everything to do with the heat. Ur bedding is so cheerful. This video is going to help so many people. Self awareness is a super power. We all need these essentials. Have a great weekend.
So true! Covid does so much more to some people that people understand. Paxolid was a blessing when I got Covid the last time. It even helped my Long Covid improve. The whole experience, and the dots, taught me so much. Yes, self-awareness is a superpower!
Thank you so very much for sharing this technique. I have tried so many and none of them have worked. This makes perfect sense and is simple. You mentioned that you had thrown away your handouts from your therapist. Perhaps he would allow you to share the handouts with us or post them himself. The handouts may help us in determining where we are in yellow/red. I also have fibromyalgia and find I get mentally overwhelmed easily on my harder days. A consistent standard would be helpful. I do love your clear explanation and you have a wonderful demeanor/personality. I am so glad I found your channel.
You're so very welcome! I wish I could share the handouts (I really don't have them, because I threw them away quite awhile ago,) but they were his copyrighted information, so I really couldn't even share them if I still had them.
The best way to get going with the DOTS is to just start and then, pay attention to how you feel. The more you log your state - being consistent - the easier it will get to tell how you are feeling and will know when it is time to stop and rest and when it's okay to do things. You'll get so you know when you are yellow/red/purple after you've logged for awhile. Promise.
You'll also get better at figuring out what you can do to rest. I learned that just sitting and watching TV wasn't necessarily the answer for me. If you have a spouse or someone you live with, you could have them watch the video so they know what you mean when you start saying things like, "I'm in the yellow."
All I have to do is say, "I'm in the yellow," and everyone knows they need to leave me alone because the sooner I rest, the sooner I'll be back in green and nobody wants me to get down in red and purple if they can help it. It gives you a common language rather than just saying, "I don't feel well," or "I'm having a bad day." I mean, what does that mean? But saying, "I'm in the yellow," or "I'm in the red," feels substantial.
Hope that helps!
@@TowardsASimpleLife Very helpful, Thank you. I'll just keep going. This has really changed my perspective.
I love this concept so much!! It is so expected to push through when you’re tired, but it’s so counter productive.
So true! The best thing is to rest and then, you can get it done.
Soooo interesting. I have way too many responsibilities and too many expectations of myself. I enter red all of the time. I have too much traveling in my mind and it doesn’t stop. Thankfully I have seen some of my patterns and make myself to take breaks, but somehow I need to limit my expectations. Very much enjoyed this video.
I'm so glad! It is helpful to me to know where I am. I still have Fibro flares and don't feel good, but the dots have helped me know what to do to get pas them. I'm very grateful that John taught me to do this. So happy to pass it along to you!
We like to take breaks with screentime which isn't taking us out of yellow!
So true. I do this more than I should, but it does help that I am far more picky about what I watch than I used to be.
I count watching these as "work" because I need to use my brain to learn.
@MsWill813 great idea!
Go easy on yourselves and do whatever you can that makes you happy and/or feel fulfilled in each moment.
- lifelonger ME - Fibro - long COVID
I’m usually in yellow , red, and purple a lot because I have kids. I cannot just decide to stop cooking food because I’ve been homeschooling all day and am in red. I can schedule in more breaks and maybe get my husband to help me more though.
Oh boy... I relate to what you've said. I raised 4 kids and homeschooled them for a couple of years. It was intense! Your idea to schedule in some breaks and get your husband to help you more is a good one.
You might also want to have him watch this video so he will know about the green, yellow, red, and purple states. I've found it is so much better to tell my husband that I'm in the "yellow" than to just say "I am too tired," or "I don't feel well," because, really... what does tired or not feeling well mean? Having a way to explain how you feel in a concrete way is so helpful. It clears up the communication so much.
I’ve never heard of Killer Color Dits, but I can relate to this idea; it’s how I’ve been able to keep my sanity. I grew up very much like you, always able to accomplish a lot & stay focused, etc. Aging, illness, grief, loss of a job or career, and other life issues or unresolved trauma can flip a switch that makes our old self almost seem like a different person. Now if I need to stop and take a walk, draw a picture, pet the dog - whatever I really enjoy AT THAT MOMENT - I do it without apology. It is self-renewal. Our tank gets empty from endless energy output and it takes more than food and sleep to fill it!
You’re so right. It does take more than food to fill our tank. I relate to the “flipping the switch” sentiment. When I was young, I couldn’t have imagined everything that happened to me and to life tends to change with each new turn in the road.
You are wonderful! Along with the advice as well.
Thank you so much. That’s very kind of you to say!
Thank you for this! I’m new to the channel. Here’s my experience in hopes it helps someone else to feel less alone. I’ve always had ADHD, and depression as a result (at least partially.) I’ve always pushed myself hard during my “good times”, then I crash really HARD, physically and emotionally. I get headaches that last for days, muscle pain, exhaustion (the kind where getting food and showering is too much, and I get out of breath easily) which all leads to deep depression. I did get COVID at least once (one of the less serious strains.) For me it was like the flu, so I didn’t consider that to be a factor in my worsening symptoms, but I am now rethinking that. I have a way of downplaying my issues, especially when I compare myself to others that have things worse. Also, we had a very difficult move and many family crisis that have contributed to stresses on my body and brain. I’ve come to feel more and more brain dead and useless over the last few years. I’m on purple and red A LOT, leading to feelings of guilt, and constantly feeling obligated to apologize for my “deficits.” I’m in a complete fog most of the time, but have people depending on me, so I really beat myself up for not being more available for them. I’ve come to heavily depend on my adhd meds for the brief window of productivity that they give me (some days) and also caffeine and sugar. This obviously leads to worse cycles of overdoing it and then crashing and sometimes (more so recently) incapacitating anxiety. I refuse to up my meds, so I have to take frequent breaks from them (every few days) or I build up a tolerance. I’m going to try this method because, I now realize that the second I get to yellow, I start pushing. I’m also going to save this video as a way to explain my situation to others. It’s so hard with these “invisible” illnesses to feel “validated” and to NOT feel like I’m just making it all up. I’ve never had a doctor that has really taken the time to help me, and honestly I have stopped trying. I’m too tired and overwhelmed to even go to the doctor, if that makes any sense. ..especially if they are just going to tell me again that the tests are normal and i just need to try different depression meds. One Dr actually laughed at me years ago and gave me a sheet of paper with stretching exercises when I asked about fibromyalgia. That’s why I wanted to leave this (extremely long 😅) comment, in case my experience helps someone else to understand that,maybe, it isn’t all in their head. I have a tiny glimmer of hope again, when it comes to managing my energy, so thank you. And by the way, watching this video and writing this comment has exhausted me, lol. That’s how wrecked my brain has become. But there’s always hope, right!💪😁 To the creator of this channel, and anyone else in a similar situation, hang in there! You’re not alone!🥰
I'm sure you will have helped many people. There are so many out there feeling that way. I'm sorry that doctor was such an idiot about your Fibromyalgia. That's cruel and just shows his ignorance. If he was following the research, he'd know better. I'm grateful that John taught me this and it's an honor to be able to help other by sharing it. Thank you so much for taking the time to share with us!
@@TowardsASimpleLife Thank you for taking the time to read my comment and reply! I subscribed after watching this video and am going to be working through your other videos. Thanks for putting yourself out there and sharing what works for you!
@IronicleseAndSardoniclese so glad you’re here!
I love the description of bugs vs forest fire! It makes so much sense.
Thank you, too, for this method. My health/fibro has not been great. It is such a good idea to start dealing with things at the yellow stage, rather than pushing through until we can’t. I have always hated the need to pace myself. This is such a sensible way (for me) to do it. Thank you! (And thank you, John.)
Do you have more fibro ideas and tips on your channel? Where can I find them, please?
Isn't that great? John really cleared things up for me with that one and best of all, other people understand what happened to me when I tell them about it. I wish I'd learned to pace myself earlier, but I still have my flares. I'm just coming out of a 5-day one. It would have lasted longer if I hadn't recognized what was going on so I could do something about it.
Fibro is such a part of my life, and I talk about it often (and how it is affecting me right then) that I would say you may related to most of the videos I've posted since the end of December. You can tell which ones they are because the thumbnails dramatically changed and there is red text on all of them. Real life is going on here. :-)
Thank you so much for taking the time (and energy!) to make this detailed video! It was very helpful - and I'm thankful that it helped (helps) you, too. Appreciate it! Good video.
You’re so welcome Deb! I’m glad it will be helpful you. It has helped me so much that it’s difficult to express. It’s a blessing to you. Thanks for your support!
LOVE that quilt!!
Me, too! I bought it 4-5 years ago from Amazon and get it out every summer. It's so cheerful!
I am feeling soo very blessed to have been gifted 💝 your kindness❣️
Thank you for your journey and for sharing it with us. So thankful for John’s too! 🤗
Thanks Lisa! I’m so grateful for John too! He made such a big difference in my life.
I like your yellow bed pillow and throw. Good visual reminder to check which dot you’re in 😉 🤩💃🎉
I hadn't ever thought of that before! 🙂
@@TowardsASimpleLife 💕🤩💃🎉
@colleenfromnh5860 ❤️❤️❤️
Oh yea… I need to do this. I have days where i wear myself out and can’t do anything for the next day and sometimes days after that. This is a great idea.
So glad you found it. I think it will help. Hope you have a great week!
I have fibromyalgia and work a very stressful job in mental health. Just getting over COVID. This was both interesting and upsetting because I recognize that I live mainly in yellow and red dipping into the purple several times a month. Green is pretty rare.
Oh man… my heart goes out to you. So tough. I hope it’s helpful some that the dots will give you a language to think about and communicate how you are feeling. It’s done that for me. So now, instead of just telling my husband “I don’t feel good,” I can say “I’m feeling yellow” and he knows just what I mean. And I know what I mean by that. I had no idea how to explain how I felt before I met John. I hope you can find some way to take care of yourself when you need a break.
@@TowardsASimpleLife thank you. I'm going to try it out. Might show me how to make some changes. My son has fibromyalgia and juvenile rheumatoid arthritis so he is very understanding and supportive. Glad you have found a way to help your husband understand
Pushing through when you actually have COVID really brings the long COVID symptoms to your body. Thanks for this great system to heed the body's wisdom!
Sometimes that is very true. When I got Covid (and early Long Covid), they were giving really bad advice and reommending these programs of improvement to work your brain. All that happened for me is that I blew my brain up (although, it may have happened anyway). I ended up getting Covid again last fall and my doctor gave me Palovid for it. It helped me quite a bit because it killed some virus cells that had been hanging around. I've read that it has helped other people with Long Covid. It did seem to stop it, but it didn't repair the damage. The DOTS help as much as anything I've tried and I'm learning some work-arounds for other things.
What a delightful person you are! Thank you for sharing and helping me improve my life. God bless you and yours beautiful lady!💖👏🏼🙏🏼
You are so welcome. I truly appreciate hearing from you. I’m glad you’re here!
This was awesome . I am also autistic like another commentor I have been in a state of burnout for a long time . Pushing myself for to long . Thank you for the information .. I remember spirograph too .
I’m so glad to hear it has helped you!
I loved Spirograph!
Wow, incredible method. Thank You for sharing 💐💕 love your videos
You are so welcome! I truly appreciate that you’re here and watching. ❤️
This was life changing information -Thank you❤
You're so welcome! I’m excited that it helped you!
Love this!! Killer dots are so creatively useful!
Also, I’m using an energy tracker called Visible. It job is to make invisible, illness, visible, but for me, it helps with pacing and also shows me which activities really take a lot out of me. I was shocked to see how much mental work saps my system even more than physical! I’m not affiliated with them, just wanted to share, because it’s another tool!
Thanks! I’ll check into Visible to see what I think. Thanks for the recommendation. I always enjoy leaning more. 😀
Great video ❤ Meant alot to me. This fatigue ruins my life. 😢 But now I'm finding ways to manage. This is so helpful 😊 Thank you xx🎉
So glad! I’m happy you found it!
Really glad this video popped up. I'm wary of tracking too much so I don't get absorbed in symptoms but seems a simple system.
It is a simple system! I can't get into complicated systems either. I tend to do it for one or two days and then I'm out. This one works for me.
So useful! Thank you 🙏😀 Carola from Sweden
I'm so glad! Thanks so much for watching. Hope you have a great week!
@@TowardsASimpleLife yeas I have, hope that you also have it.
Most people are rarely in red or purple? Woah. 🤯 Those are my normal. This explains so much
It was a wake-up call for me too. It was so important for me to learn what that means, because I could start doing something about it.
Thank you so much for this video!!!! I’m in my 30s and I got long covid in 2022 and it’s been quite the life altering experience!! Energy pacing has been key and I think I will add this method to my regiment as well 😊thank you!!!
Long Covid changed my life completely. I’m glad this will help!! 😀
Works for chronic fatigue also i think. Great idea. Alongside ‘spoon theory’👍👍👍👍
Yes it does! It's a great tool for Chronic Fatigue too. So nice to meet you!
So glad RUclips sent me here, this is so helpful - thank you ❤
So glad it was helpful and that RUclips helped you find it!
This video made me want to cry tears of thankfulness. It was one of the most helpful and powerful things I’ve ever heard! When I caught Covid almost two years ago, it triggered fibromyalgia in my body. I’ve been struggling and feeling super alone ever since about this journey. Your video made me feel seen and not so alone. Thank you. I will start first thing tomorrow morning. Today was a 🔴 so praying a good night sleep will get me in the right direction.
I’m so grateful to have heard from you. It means a great deal to me to know that the video has helped you. John would be so pleased. It does sound like we have a few things in common. I’m so sorry that you’ve had the Covid/Fibro struggle too. It’s so real. What you have been going through is real. If you have any questions, just let me know and I’ll do my best to answer them.
Alex Howard has a lot of resources that might be worth checking out. He runs the Optimum Health Clinic in London, but these lots of other stuff online, some of it free. Good luck 💞
@@laurenlauren4239 Thanks!
This is pretty astonishing to me. Thank you
I hope it helps!
I really do need this. July 4 4 AM I was at the ER very high blood pressure trembling. When I left, I was healthy according to the doctor. it took a day and the Internet to realize I had had an anxiety attack.
I definitely will be checking other episodes
I’m so glad it was helpful to you. I think this method could help. It takes a little bit to get used to logging and you might forget sometimes, but just reconstruct what you can remember and move forward. Any record you make will be helpful to you. I’m starting to use the method to log something else, to see if it can get me past a problem. If it does, I’m going to do another video about what happened. It will be months before I know though. Thanks for saying hello!
I have cerebral palsy - thank you for this perspective!
You are so very welcome!
Game changer! Thank you for posting this.
You’re so welcome!
very helpful, thanks for making this video
You're welcome!
Thank you, this was so helpful. I'm going to implement it and look for what my "stressors" are with my dots. Thank you for sharing what you have learned so that we can find help too. 😊
You are so welcome! So glad it was helpful to you.
Brilliant content, thank you for this.
You are so very welcome. Thanks for commenting!
Love this simple idea . . . my brain is very taxed working at a crazy start up where they change the game plan almost every week. Very exhausting! My brain is tired with all the constant changes. I don't get down on myself because even the 30yr olds are brain tired and just don't work as hard. lol
Wow, that sounds exhausting. I actually grew a start-up and it was a crazy time. I don't think I have the physical ability to do that now. I wish I'd know about the DOTS method then, though. I drove myself so hard that I got sick over and over and over... Yeah... don't get down on yourself.
Great video. I'm going to use these colors. I think it will be very helpful method of deciding to work or to rest.
Thanks Connie!! It sure helps me. Eventually I got to the point where I don’t have to mark up the calendar, but it took quite a while. I guess I’m a slow learner about myself. But now, everyone in the family knows what I mean if I say I’m in the yellow. Occasionally, Gary will tell me I’m pushing myself into red and I need to stop now. It makes it so much easier to communicate where I am with my health without anyone getting bugged about it. They would lots sooner help me stay in the green as much as possible.
Thank you for this. I have fibromyalgia, too, along with other health issues. I think these killer dots will help me. I easily cross over from yellow to red, and I'd like to boost my awareness of yellow so I can decrease going into red.
Oh, I’m so glad to hear that it might help you! It has made such a difference to me because I learned that I regularly blasted myself into yellow and then ignored it and went red. Then I’d crash for days or weeks. I still have problems like getting ill really affects me as does extreme weather changes (drops in pressure are awful), but overall, I would say that the DOTS make me and my family more patient with my reality. So glad to talk to you!
Thanks for sharing your strategies!! I have been using journaling to help manage my life, but had not thought to monitor my energy levels throughout the day. This makes so much sense to me!! Definitely adding this idea to my routine. For the longest time all I could do was track what I was doing without understanding the links between my activity and my results. The bullet journal method has gotten me quite a long way, but now I have killer dots too! I’ve been using Kuretake dot markers in a lot of different ways as I journal, and here’s a great addition!! Off to play with color in my journal, whee!!
It seems to me that this would work perfectly in a billet journal. Good idea!
Thank you for this! It makes me realize I push myself too hard until I "hit a wall" which is red/purple for me.
You’re so very welcome! You sound like me. That’s what I tend to do. The Dots have given me a reality check.
You've made good points about taking breaks and not feeling guilty for taking care of yourself. I'll definitely check in with myself more often because of it. I won't do tne jounaling because I really don't want to put extra focus on what I 'can't' or 'shouldn't' do. I believe what you focus on is what you get more of, like attracts like, sort if thing. Focusing on too many yellow/red/purple dots will beget more if the same -ymmmv. I'll just remind myself I can continue my task after a break or the next day if need be and it isn't procrastination. Instead, it's taking care of my health.
Thank you for some extra insight and management.
I think that maybe I didn’t explain the journaling well. I just wrote down the activities I did which enabled me to look back and remember what happened. Then I started to see patterns.
It wasn’t a record of what I can’t or shouldn’t do. Instead, I learned what I can’t or shouldn’t do when I am fatigued or sick, because I hadn’t been taking care of myself well. I tend to forget from day to day what happens and what I did. I started to see that so often, I had ignored my body and had done too much and made myself worse. The logging was important to help me respect myself more.
I don’t agree that focusing too much on /yellow/red/purple begets more. This is not obsessing on colors. It is educating yourself.
Remember: I had Long Covid. I was very sick. Instead of resting and caring for myself. I had seriously overdone it which made me much worse. This is why there was such a long period of red and purple. It was not an obsession. It was a real illness that needed to be respected. Seeing the colors taught me a lot and helped motivate me to take better care of myself which eventually moves me back to green. It is not understanding yourself that makes things worse and the dots method helped trained me to respect the messages my body was giving me.
For instance, I came down with a cold this week. I caught it at a restaurant. I have learned that if I want to get over viruses faster, I have to respect my body and give it time required to heal. I cannot rush it because rushing it actually extends the recovery period.
My cognitive therapist watched this video and he said that he is astonished at the improvement I have made. The dots method was key. I learned it so well that I don’t have to make a log anymore because it taught me to listen and honor my body. Whenever I feel fatigue begin, I listen and take a break. It doesn’t take long for me to bounce back and I can go back to activity.
I hope that helps!
Appreciate your content. Thank you
Glad you enjoy it! Thank you for being here!
I use grease pencils to mark my calendar. They show up brightly & are very easy to mark the paper but don't bleed through or smear. ❤ I couldn't find purple ones so I use green, yellow, red & blue. If I can't find blue, I'll use black. Now I'm going to try the Killer Dots instead of writing everything out. 😊
This is a great idea! Do you have a whiteboard or glass calendar?
@TowardsASimpleLife Thanks! 🥰
I have a whiteboard & a paper calendar in the hallway. I also have a lot of glass surfaces & mirrors where I can leave notes if needed so everyone will see them ☺️ They write smooth on most surfaces (glass, metal, paper, plastic & even wood).
@Darvit_Nu That’s awesome. I wish I had a hall where I could do that. It would be helpful.
Just found you and I am thrilled! I seem to be in your same boat at 77. I will be listening closely and appreciate your insight!
I’m so glad you’re here!!
Omg, thank you! I think this is really going to help me regulate so I'm not having so much wild swing trying to keep moving forward ❤
I'm so glad! My favorite part is that I understand what is happening to me and can take breaks and slow down when I need to without feeling guilty. I know the ultimately, this is the fastest way back to green. It’s great to talk to you.
Thank you for sharing. I've been trying so hard to track myself. How I am feeling and doing. This simplies it. Looks easy and I will try it
Glad it was helpful!
Thank you for this. I really could use this in my life. I have my own disabilities yet I am still caring for 2 other people. I need this!
I’m so glad it will be helpful to you. I’m grateful that John taught it to me and happy I can share my experience with others. Thanks for letting me know!
Wow, I’m in purple way too often. This makes so much sense, thank you so very much for sharing.❤
You are so welcome!
Just stumbled across your video, I’am currently struggling with long covid & dysautonomia almost 3years ! I found this video very helpful and informative, thank you
Hi! I’m so glad it’s helpful to you. 3 years is a long time. It truly helped me - made such a big difference. Life isn’t perfect, but it’s better than it was there for a while. Learning how to do this has been key.
Thank you for making this video! Such a helpful method, I can't wait to put it into practice
You are so welcome! I’m so glad John shared it with me and I’m happy I could share it with you.
I have had to learn to stop doing all of something just to get it done, because i have severe low back pain plus all over body pain, so big chores like sweeping the pool, i decide before hand what half i will do, do that half and just stop, might be break time, then either later that day or the next day, do the other half. I always say it's better than it was, or it's more done than it was.
That is so wise. It's so important to learn when you need to break up chores.
I heard killer dots…. I like this, I’m keeping it.
So glad you liked it! 😀😀
You're an intelligent individual. I like "killer colors". Maybe your subconscious is leaking out your creativity! Thanks for the techniques! ❤
That is so kind of you to say. I suspect my subconscious leaks a lot of things when I talk. Hopefully, not too many bad things!
Wow, this is so me. I will have to review this vid. The basics are easy to understand, but I feel there is more there.
So glad that you found it! If you have any questions, I’m happy to help.
Thank you for the explanation!! I think I should focus on “colored dots” instead of the other. I need to stay positive!!
Blessings from Tx
You are so welcome!