Krod, the Angry Carpenter

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  • Опубликовано: 22 янв 2025

Комментарии • 123

  • @Xezian
    @Xezian 7 лет назад +249

    KROD CONSIDERS SELF MILITANT AGNOSTIC
    KROD KNOW NOT WHAT TO BELIEVE
    AND HE IS VERY _FRUSTRATED_ WITH THAT

    • @TheOrganicartist
      @TheOrganicartist 5 лет назад +12

      @WolfgangLMclain Krod could still be very frustrated with not knowing. Just to be clear.

  • @thealchemistking4063
    @thealchemistking4063 6 лет назад +348

    "i rolled to intimidate the wood" this is the best line ever

    • @katyanbs4391
      @katyanbs4391 6 лет назад +11

      I roll to intimidate wood daily

    • @ajobdunwell2585
      @ajobdunwell2585 6 лет назад +6

      As a carpenter intimidation is the best way to work wood, just talk nice to it once u get it. Where u want it.

    • @0whatman
      @0whatman 6 лет назад

      lmao

    • @TinyFoxTom
      @TinyFoxTom 6 лет назад +8

      Reminds me of the time I used Diplomacy to negotiate difficult terrain.

    • @Legendary_Starlink
      @Legendary_Starlink 6 лет назад

      @@TinyFoxTom I want to hear that story.

  • @Furry19931993
    @Furry19931993 6 лет назад +346

    "Krod chose suprise..." oh god im dead ....i didnt see that one coming ... brilliant

    • @boxtank5288
      @boxtank5288 6 лет назад +19

      Partygnom That is Krod's point!

    • @alexandercross9081
      @alexandercross9081 6 лет назад +16

      Neither did the suitor

    • @233Deadman
      @233Deadman 6 лет назад +4

      so stealing that for one of my characters, just in case

    • @benkayvfalsifier3817
      @benkayvfalsifier3817 6 лет назад

      Chuck Norris knows all the elements, but only acknowledges one element; the element of surprise. This "surprise" joke is so old, love it though.

    • @BanetheWolfGod
      @BanetheWolfGod 5 лет назад

      K

  • @juicie12
    @juicie12 6 лет назад +163

    I had a character like this once but instead of intimidate it was bluff.
    I once rolled so high I convinced a teammate, my enemies and myself, that I was a better fighter while on fire. A few (lucky) rolls later, Chinji The Fire Dancer was a story going from town to town.

  • @StellaStarfall
    @StellaStarfall 7 лет назад +393

    Ngl dude, holy shit I had somebody like this in a campaign. He was a full Strength Orc Rogue, guy had 28 strength at level 1 cause he found a magic ring first thing, and this guy has a feat that adds his strength to his Intimidate. The guy's tag line that campaign was "I roll to intimidate", because let me give you a list of things he intimidated.
    An entire squad of goblins
    Himself
    Fire
    An entire forest
    A village he wasn't even in
    The entire Adventurer's Guild
    An entire camp of bandits
    And more...
    Gronkus Gaarn was an interesting bloke.

    • @marley7868
      @marley7868 6 лет назад +59

      how did he intimidate himself

    • @anidiot9831
      @anidiot9831 6 лет назад +50

      Just that intimidating I guess

    • @oddluck4180
      @oddluck4180 6 лет назад +36

      I want to see the entire story.

    • @alexandercross9081
      @alexandercross9081 6 лет назад +25

      How does one intimidate fire?

    • @august4476
      @august4476 6 лет назад +25

      Just that intimidating I guess

  • @lsswappedcessna
    @lsswappedcessna 6 лет назад +157

    *rolls to intimidate wood planks*
    *natural 20*
    *planks stand up and climb the mast, forming a Crow's Nest as they reach the top*

    • @firestorm165
      @firestorm165 5 лет назад +7

      plot twist the wood was a mimic

    • @zackadiax2414
      @zackadiax2414 5 лет назад +14

      @@firestorm165 but is that necessarily a bad thing? Mimic know better than to not be a crows nest.

    • @firestorm165
      @firestorm165 5 лет назад +3

      very true, until someone goes to use it that is

  • @silverseth7
    @silverseth7 7 лет назад +36

    "You No See Krod" Oh fuck, I'm laughing so hard I'm in tears.

  • @bogustoast22none25
    @bogustoast22none25 6 лет назад +128

    I have a similar tale, however this one involves a friend of mine being a mechanic... Oh boy... He liked to build things, to make things, to... Repair things.
    So to give some context, this was an apocalyptic future, mythical creatures became to appear in our modern age and some idiot launched nukes left and right, no one knows who though *glares at Russia and US on a world map*. In any case, we went into hybernation and woke up in the future.
    Eventually, after some sad times as each individual character understands all that they lost but look towards what the future brings, we eventually meet.
    My friend named his British character "Edward Cunningham the 3rd".
    We met on a battleship... Which was recently sabotaged by another player, Edward has to begin repairs as the ship even though fully crewed, can't fix shit. Edwsrd, with a nail(yes "a" nail as in one 2x4, and a hammer) fixes the radio and the engine... He critical 20s... 4 times, leaving only the cannon but then... We rolled a 1 for encounter... We got a boss fight.
    The rest of the soon to be named "FUBAR" battled a kraken... We were not doing so well. We were holding it off, but the ship was taking the brunt of it. He was using a flamethrower... He got tired of failing rolls and accidentally killing crewmembers. He said "Fuck it" and went to repair while the ship was still bare minimum health. With the same 2x4, nail and hammer that he fixed the engine and radio before, he not only brought it back to full combat capacity, but added a lot of shit to it... All while we were working to keep the kraken at Bay, suffice to say... We won.

    • @thomass2505
      @thomass2505 6 лет назад +15

      All that luck went to construction. All that luck

    • @dhufflepuff348
      @dhufflepuff348 6 лет назад +1

      The game sounds like rifts from what you said

    • @boomerpro87
      @boomerpro87 6 лет назад +5

      bogustoast22 none did he hit the ship so hard with the hammer that it warped reality into fixing it?

  • @brockgoley211
    @brockgoley211 6 лет назад +17

    Now, I am not a person who laughs very often, not during Do Not Laugh videos or during many comedies, but when Krod glared at the wood with such passion and the narrator said so nochalantly that "I roll to intimate the wood" I literally was in tears. That is one, if not THE, funniest thing I have ever heard.

  • @HoundofOdin
    @HoundofOdin 6 лет назад +17

    "Fancy Pants tell Krod to choose weapon. Krod choose SURPRISE."
    🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

  • @davemarx7856
    @davemarx7856 6 лет назад +22

    "Krod choose _surprise_ "
    😂

  • @lisbjerg123
    @lisbjerg123 6 лет назад +31

    the punch-line just makes it all the more funny! oh god the tears of laughter!

  • @isengaja
    @isengaja 7 лет назад +83

    LMAO, intimidate wood

    • @dhufflepuff348
      @dhufflepuff348 6 лет назад +2

      When it's No Nut November and you get a hard on

  • @thealchemistking4063
    @thealchemistking4063 3 года назад

    What i love about these videos is despite the lack of background music, your voice and narration perfectly fill that void.

  • @MegaJman143
    @MegaJman143 6 лет назад +25

    “Angry Carpenter”

  • @stevewright8284
    @stevewright8284 6 лет назад +15

    stealth through intimidation is dope

  • @Kuronosa
    @Kuronosa Год назад

    This is my favorite retelling of Krod's deeds...I love this so much.

  • @Mobius0078
    @Mobius0078 6 лет назад +52

    Please tell me there is more Krod.

    • @_ridor
      @_ridor 6 лет назад +1

      There are at least two krod stories not mentioned here

  • @RangePup
    @RangePup 6 лет назад +4

    This is one of my favorite D&D stories

  • @discipleoftzeentch8384
    @discipleoftzeentch8384 6 лет назад +9

    Wanderbot’s grave of man campaign: in like episode 1 this bugbear paladin intimidates a pack leader kobold into better a goblin for the rest of the game, skitter skeeve went on to become an unstoppable, unkillable god, who probably could roll a nat 1 and still succeed through irl black magic, and he was a DMPC

    • @jesseppi5027
      @jesseppi5027 6 лет назад

      its too bad though that the friendships fell apart, the only multiplayer we get anymore is with Chelle

  • @purple-pluto
    @purple-pluto Год назад

    We need more of these types of story's back

  • @deathmastersful
    @deathmastersful 5 лет назад +9

    I tried making a “krod” but my GM wouldn’t let me XD

  • @sausageman4086
    @sausageman4086 6 лет назад +11

    Angry carpenter is the name of a swedish tv show

  • @lordmars2387
    @lordmars2387 6 лет назад +4

    But what about krod stealing silver door?

  • @jerodak6462
    @jerodak6462 6 лет назад +1

    At first I read the title as "Krod the angry Catepillar" that was fun to imagine for a bit.

  • @windsgrace688
    @windsgrace688 6 лет назад

    When I was listening to this, I realized that I had read this through a 4chan green text and I loved it then. Regardless of whether this is based off that or this is your own (green text was originally posted on 5/28/13) it's good to have the tale fully voiced and immortalized in this way.

  • @cosmicgenesis1581
    @cosmicgenesis1581 5 лет назад +2

    YOU
    NO
    SEE
    KROD

  • @yoyojoe11
    @yoyojoe11 6 лет назад +3

    intimidate wood is that how wooden space hulk fly?

  • @oakrunt
    @oakrunt 6 лет назад +6

    Lmao, that sounds almost like Old Ben's story from Fallout New Vegas

  • @zackadiax2414
    @zackadiax2414 6 лет назад +2

    why am i laughing so much?
    i cant breath!
    save m-

  • @kitalthevali
    @kitalthevali 6 лет назад +2

    I FOUND IT I HEARD ABOUT THIS AT SUMMER CAMP STAFF FROM ONE OF THE PEOPLE WHO PLAYED THIS, KROD IS THE BEST!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!1!!1!11!!

  • @monkeydragonson9851
    @monkeydragonson9851 5 лет назад +1

    Krod is sneakiest boy

  • @DARKESTMAGICIAN
    @DARKESTMAGICIAN 6 лет назад

    I read about this on tumblr. They said instead of stealth you put all points into intimidation and would just walk through town yelling you dont see krod

  • @purplespeckledappleeater8738
    @purplespeckledappleeater8738 5 лет назад

    YES!!! My hero!

  • @scottydoodlebob1559
    @scottydoodlebob1559 5 лет назад

    Oh my god I'm still laughing, I'm crying, wtf "YOU NO SEE KROD!"

  • @joshuabarron9953
    @joshuabarron9953 5 лет назад

    I want to know how this continues!!!

  • @RossRedman404
    @RossRedman404 6 лет назад +1

    In D&D I had a 20 dex (I rolled max on Dex but shit everything else, mainly the lowest was 6 strength, keep this in mind.) So I pictured scrawny elf, really agile but weak as fuck. Funny thing was I would always have him do strength things more than dex things.
    "I want to lift the heavy table with food on it to use it as cover." I roll, I fail... repeat, rinse.
    Final sessions, we were making our way through a pyramid of snake people who obsessed over becoming god like. My character at that point had a side weapon beside his +1 bow to use in combat. A shield, and glove. (This glove was counted as a 1d4 blunt damage going off of strength) But thankfully I got some bonus for it and it became 1d4 + 0. I got it coated with the metal in D&D 5e that did autocrit damage on objects.
    Now we had reached big sandstone doors, the paladin and rogue both took a wack at it to open it, and failing. My elf walks up, takes a big swing, and hits the door with max damage, along with the hits the other two made, he was able to bust down the huge ass doors. The room was full of snake cultists summoning a giant snake, they had just gotten done... I immediately said. "I roll to intimidate" Dm was like, why and how? "To them, a scrawny ass elf that looks like he is one strong wind away from breaking in half, busted down two sandstone doors with a big ass dude and a rogue behind him." He allows it.
    Nat 20
    Everyone in the room including my partners were intimidated. Including... the monstrous snake.

  • @rieshishgarmee5046
    @rieshishgarmee5046 6 лет назад +1

    Hope to see more of this or it's funny

  • @yesmansam6686
    @yesmansam6686 4 года назад +1

    You know society is decaying once they stop speaking of Krod's epic feats.

  • @duskdovahkiin5814
    @duskdovahkiin5814 5 лет назад

    Please tell me there are more stories about Krod!

  • @kre8or465
    @kre8or465 6 лет назад

    he intimidated the wood into being a crows nest....

  • @benhramiak8781
    @benhramiak8781 6 лет назад +2

    amazing

  • @toastertech1181
    @toastertech1181 5 лет назад

    remind to self, in the future if want to be wood worker be very angry, it will work.. possibly.. maybe.. most likely

  • @direwolf8703
    @direwolf8703 5 лет назад

    this is amazing I'm using this idea

  • @nicholi8933
    @nicholi8933 5 лет назад

    That carpentry sounds like my monk. I once made a monk in 3.5. We defended a town from the Sahuagin. I had put a single point into profession cook, because I always put a single point into some profession so I can say I am said profession. I rolled to see if I could cook the them. I rolled a nat 20, so my dm ruled that they carry a reagent pouch, not for magic, but it is full of spices that make them delicious. It was hilarious.

  • @brandonfly2475
    @brandonfly2475 6 лет назад +5

    I end up one time playing a half demon sorcerer had a +21 to intimidate and + 15 to persuade well a few time killd a magic user the resurrected him and turned him in to my apprentice. My chacter had +1 to sneak so everyone always foud him untill i used intemadate to tell them you no see me keeping in mind that he is 15 foot tall person with a 11 foot sword on his back and no one ever saw him or more like not stupid enough to say anthing

  • @equarg
    @equarg 5 лет назад

    😅Wow. Krod is so scary, even inanimate objects do his bidding.
    Krod screams at some planks of wood and a bag of nails on a ship,
    “Krod wants a crows nest NOW”!!
    Wood makes crows nest for him on the spot!

  • @--CHARLIE--
    @--CHARLIE-- 6 лет назад

    I once played one session of pathfinder with no other pics. Npc's were the rest of the party. I played a fighter and decided to try being more star oriented with my character. I had never been much of a power gamer and no one else was saying with me at first
    I ended up with +13 intimidate. At level one. It could have been +16 but I decided to branch out more. This was in pathfinder like the character in this video. I don't know why I'm commenting this but it does have to do with stuff in the video unlike other comments on these types of videos. If anyone bothers to read all this have a good day

    • @B.E.N_
      @B.E.N_ Год назад

      Nice profile picture

  • @Pastafari4
    @Pastafari4 8 лет назад +5

    Top. Fucking. Kek.

  • @Mabra51
    @Mabra51 3 года назад

    How tall is Krod?

  • @eccoeco3454
    @eccoeco3454 4 года назад

    And that's how Waaahg fields work kids

  • @loganjamesonhatch5050
    @loganjamesonhatch5050 6 лет назад

    Krod is wizard

  • @justacook6858
    @justacook6858 6 лет назад

    I see nothing I wasn't here I did not even get up this morning embed German accent

  • @erinshipinski7332
    @erinshipinski7332 5 лет назад

    I saw this on tumblr as “grog”

  • @AelakSmith
    @AelakSmith 7 лет назад +3

    can we get the full saga of krod? i.imgur.com/tKjBWlD.png

    • @TheTaleForge
      @TheTaleForge  7 лет назад

      I wasn't aware there was more! Usually the screencaps cut off after the duel.

    • @bmschi001
      @bmschi001 7 лет назад

      Aelak Smith I

  • @douglas0828
    @douglas0828 6 лет назад +1

    I laughed all the way :D

  • @sfdfd2
    @sfdfd2 5 лет назад

    Weird shit, I hear about two different DND online videos that are very similar with the jigalow line as a distraction. I assume people just make this stuff up and steal each other ideas

  • @timothystowell3122
    @timothystowell3122 6 лет назад

    Lol

  • @Dhomazhir
    @Dhomazhir 4 года назад

    I love the Krod story but god-damn does this voice over have issues with pacing, emoting, and humor.
    You sound stoned and dead tired.If you rerecord this ever, go faster with more life. Sound like you give a shit about the story. Hell watch Tod of Tods Workshop. See how into it he gets? Be that. This story needs to be faster, with more life (any life) have some humor, emotion, and be in the head of Krod.

  • @JamesJNothingIsTooSensitive
    @JamesJNothingIsTooSensitive 6 лет назад +2

    This is a stolen story.

    • @robintupta7446
      @robintupta7446 6 лет назад +1

      James J stolen from what?

    • @JamesJNothingIsTooSensitive
      @JamesJNothingIsTooSensitive 6 лет назад

      Robin Tupta It is a rather well known story among the D&D community...
      Here is one of many links. This guy was not Krod.
      amp.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/1nktlg/krod_the_half_orc_rogue/

    • @sirmellington7878
      @sirmellington7878 6 лет назад +14

      It isn't.
      He doesn't claim that it is his story at any point.
      He is not the one who experienced the story,but he just retells it.
      If you look at his channel and watch a few videos,he retells a lot of Pen & Paper RPG Stories and usually puts links in the description.He also sometimes says which Story he'll retell next at the end of videos

    • @JamesJNothingIsTooSensitive
      @JamesJNothingIsTooSensitive 6 лет назад +2

      If you watch the video, he starts by saying "This is a wrap-up from a module we were playing, but I had fun the whole way. I played Krod the half-orc rogue."
      It doesn't matter if on his Patreon he says it wasn't his story. He doesn't say it in the video, and he doesn't even say so in the video description, which would still be somewhat shady as we know almost no one reads descriptions, but that would at *_least_* be somewhat fair as other people not reading the description can't be held against him.
      However not admitting to the truth on the actual video's page *_is_* his fault. He is lying to the people who he knows aren't on the Patreon - and he knows it. Why? Because as long as most of the viewers think it is his story, they will come here for more of them - and that gets him that sweet, sweet youtube money. It's plagiarism.
      Your defense is irrelevant.

    • @aguyontheinternet9095
      @aguyontheinternet9095 6 лет назад +6

      Welp you're saying it's stolen so...
      Source? After all if he "stole" the story that means there's an original somewhere.
      Cuz I'm gonna bet the source uses the "This is a wrap-up from a module we were playing, but I had fun the whole way. I played Krod the half-orc rogue." line.
      Edit: Read the link it uses the EXACT same line at the beginning. SO he's literally reading the ENTIRE story and you're giving him shit because he didn't preface THIS one even though virtually this ENTIRE channel is vocal reads of existing stories.