Bonzy the Sad Clown

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  • Опубликовано: 13 сен 2024
  • Some clowns make people laugh. Some clowns terrify people. Bonzy is just plain depressed.
    Original tale here: i.redd.it/pifv...
    I've started a Patreon to try and get some funds to re-open my Soundcloud: / cloak_and_dagger

Комментарии • 245

  • @AlleluiaElizabeth
    @AlleluiaElizabeth 6 лет назад +498

    "Pick a card, any card." "Not that one." lol

  • @Gwennerini
    @Gwennerini 5 лет назад +210

    A man is extremely depressed. He decides to visit a doctor. He asks the doctor for a cure to his depression. The doctor says "The great clown Pagliacci is in town, go see him". The man starts uncontrollably sobbing. He looks up at the doctor and says, "But doctor, I am Pagliacci!"

    • @FourOf92000
      @FourOf92000 4 года назад +13

      Pagliacci
      also ey, _Watchmen_ reference

    • @Gwennerini
      @Gwennerini 4 года назад +3

      @@FourOf92000 Thanks, I had no fucking clue how to spell it

    • @dannylamb456
      @dannylamb456 4 года назад +4

      *honks nose*

    • @thealchemistking4063
      @thealchemistking4063 3 года назад +2

      Do you watch tear of grace or did he also make a reference

  • @Cernumospete
    @Cernumospete 5 лет назад +103

    "I wanted Suzie to be happy."
    ...
    DUDE. THAT'S A FOUL. THAT'S RIGHT INTO THE GONADS WITH A WRECKING BALL.

  • @vasilnz
    @vasilnz 5 лет назад +365

    *knock knock*
    Who's there?
    Not Suzy
    I laughed so hard at this

    • @FeyTheBin
      @FeyTheBin 5 лет назад +27

      It's so goddamn dark and unexpected. XD

    • @dogman9223
      @dogman9223 5 лет назад +7

      Vasily N that profile pic really fits

    • @charliejones3272
      @charliejones3272 5 лет назад +3

      after I heard it, it took me an embarrassingly long time to get it

  • @BlancaMari
    @BlancaMari 5 лет назад +154

    "Suzie lost both her arms to cancer"
    "Knock Knick. Who's there? Not Suzie"
    I laughed at this bit until I realized the significance of Suzie and now Everything is sad. I am sad.

  • @Koppu1doragon
    @Koppu1doragon 6 лет назад +494

    How is it so many of these stories manage to actually pull off the noble sacrifice so well?

    • @joelhaggis5054
      @joelhaggis5054 5 лет назад +41

      Trick is you never hear about the ones that don't.

    • @bijtmntongaf
      @bijtmntongaf 5 лет назад +28

      @@joelhaggis5054 ya do, but most of em are in dnd player horror stories.

  • @LunarTales
    @LunarTales 5 лет назад +159

    I told my mother the Suzy jokes at my cousin’s wedding and she laughed so hard she cried. It was a good night.

  • @alphonmoller9486
    @alphonmoller9486 6 лет назад +391

    Not all heroes wear capes.

  • @entropyzero5588
    @entropyzero5588 5 лет назад +118

    Tomorrow comes, tomorrow goes
    But the cloud remains the same
    Wonder why he’s feeling down
    Tears of a clown
    Maybe it’s all just for the best
    Lay his weary head to rest
    Was forever feeling drowned
    Tears of a clown

  • @keithkania3810
    @keithkania3810 6 лет назад +199

    I would’ve thought the cultists would’ve gotten depression from bonzi’s jokes

    • @VirtuesOfSin
      @VirtuesOfSin 5 лет назад +19

      I guess you could say that the elder god's heart fell to pieces.

    • @keithkania3810
      @keithkania3810 5 лет назад +12

      Bad-dum * sad trumpet *

    • @tysonroser4835
      @tysonroser4835 5 лет назад +13

      If they're trying to summon an eldritch god, they're probably long past depression.

    • @andresond2
      @andresond2 5 лет назад +7

      *Bonzis joke inflicts sanity damage*

  • @clone10123
    @clone10123 6 лет назад +85

    "Guess I threw the book at you" I involuntarily punched my leg I laughed so hard

    • @Soitisisit
      @Soitisisit 5 лет назад +2

      I'm glad I'm not the only one who does that!

  • @MizukiStone44
    @MizukiStone44 7 лет назад +520

    Well, he did go out with a bang, as he wanted.
    Kind of saw the Suzi thing coming. Didn't mean it didn't have impact.
    Wonderful performance as a VA. You really gave the lines impact. Masterfully done.

    • @TheTaleForge
      @TheTaleForge  7 лет назад +28

      Did the best I could, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

    • @theone614777
      @theone614777 6 лет назад +1

      Who’s Suzi

    • @leedoyle9007
      @leedoyle9007 5 лет назад +7

      @@theone614777 Watch the damn video

    • @theone614777
      @theone614777 5 лет назад

      Lee Doyle no u.

    • @leedoyle9007
      @leedoyle9007 5 лет назад +6

      @@theone614777 Already did, that's why I know who Suzi is

  • @bradpotts1747
    @bradpotts1747 6 лет назад +151

    honk. [me responding with dumb laughter]

  • @Movman82
    @Movman82 5 лет назад +27

    I've heard the Suzy joke before, but turning her into an important character like that was amazing.

  • @Hailix4240
    @Hailix4240 6 лет назад +205

    I relate to this character on a spiritual level.

  • @BathrobeKeck
    @BathrobeKeck 6 лет назад +179

    Feckin beautiful. Long may the legend of Bonzy live alongside Henderson and Boxcar Joe

    • @jold3174
      @jold3174 5 лет назад

      Long live

    • @DraconicDuelist
      @DraconicDuelist 5 лет назад

      I haven't heard of Boxcar Joe. Love the tale of Old Man Henderson though.

    • @evantyler8647
      @evantyler8647 5 лет назад

      @@DraconicDuelist read it. Its good

    • @DraconicDuelist
      @DraconicDuelist 5 лет назад +1

      @@evantyler8647 Yeah, afte leaving the comment, I found the video on Boxcar Joe, The Magic Hobo. Fantastic!

  • @CatalanPhrase
    @CatalanPhrase 7 лет назад +277

    Jesus Christ. Bonzy might make a cameo in my next GURPS campaign.

  • @bcajma12
    @bcajma12 7 лет назад +138

    This reminds me of my Homebrew "Aurora 4x" inspired campaign where one of my players (a ship captain named Bruntus Fizzruld) was so stupid he once rammed an enemy Assault Cruiser six times the size of his 500m long destroyer to save a fleet outnumbered 5 to 1.
    He survived most of the campaign until he did the first smart thing of the entire campaign. Towards the end, when surrounded by an enemy invasion fleet, captain of the only ship (destroyer) fast enough to alert the main fleet, and compulsive hoarder of explosives. . .
    Well, the crazy bastard offered to fly a shuttle to surrender himself, his vessel and military secrets to the enemy admiral in exchange for his life. I felt so proud describing the scene of a super massive explosion of ~150,000 tons of Apocalypse-class Battleship consuming the surrounding battleships, carriers and cruisers.
    He was easily the most hated character through the entire campaign but he finally did _something_ right in his final moments.

    • @MistaMeowmers
      @MistaMeowmers 5 лет назад +6

      Incredible idea, using Aurora 4X for an RP campaign. It's such an amazing game! Soooo hard to get into...

  • @themanonthewall7029
    @themanonthewall7029 6 лет назад +108

    bonzy is a good guy serial killer clown ! i never thought id type that.

  • @katyc.8663
    @katyc.8663 5 лет назад +11

    "Bonzy was sad, not stupid."
    XD

  • @TheTaleForge
    @TheTaleForge  7 лет назад +118

    Didn't have time to record the next Guardsmen, but I'm not letting a week stay empty!

    • @brokenlord3218
      @brokenlord3218 5 лет назад

      This story is making me cry it is good

  • @kingspud9548
    @kingspud9548 6 лет назад +78

    damn, this hit me hard, like oohgie the dwarf

    • @livingchaosmatrix
      @livingchaosmatrix 5 лет назад +21

      Tommy Mourad Nothing can hit as hard a Oohgie.

    • @Scorpion23341
      @Scorpion23341 5 лет назад +11

      @@livingchaosmatrix Obongo is pretty close

  • @cetitanenthusiast776
    @cetitanenthusiast776 5 лет назад +6

    Wait... the first joke he told was also his backstory? That's incredible!

  • @mileslugo6430
    @mileslugo6430 6 лет назад +56

    I love bonzy's black jokes

    • @WolfTwister
      @WolfTwister 6 лет назад +4

      Miles Lugo connotation is a powerful thing

    • @Budew-ef6tr
      @Budew-ef6tr 5 лет назад +1

      Agreed

  • @Willimanist
    @Willimanist 6 лет назад +29

    I'M NOT CRYING! YOU'RE CRYING!

  • @benkayvfalsifier3817
    @benkayvfalsifier3817 5 лет назад +15

    Dude, I'm on the verge of tears right now. Tragically beautiful. Well done for an unexpected, but marvelous character and story.

  • @Deamons64
    @Deamons64 5 лет назад +7

    That final speech of his is fucking incredible. I can only imagine how it’d been if one of my players actually pulled out a damn balloon and started doing the act during the speech.

  • @DolusVulpes
    @DolusVulpes 5 лет назад +3

    This is a perfect example of how any character idea can be a good one if it's played right, no matter how silly it is. Because even a sad clown might have what it takes to be a hero.

  • @joseveloz388
    @joseveloz388 6 лет назад +18

    Jesus Christ that was amazing bonzy the sad clown hit me so hard in the feels in the end

  • @drewnash8113
    @drewnash8113 6 лет назад +106

    Almost as good as old man Henderson.

    • @BunnyTheOverlord
      @BunnyTheOverlord 5 лет назад +6

      Better IMO

    • @johnnygreenface4195
      @johnnygreenface4195 4 года назад

      @@BunnyTheOverlord if only it was longer

    • @spinyjustspiny3289
      @spinyjustspiny3289 3 года назад +7

      @@BunnyTheOverlord Old Man Henderson was made out of spite.
      Bonzy was made out of a desire to shock the GM into letting people play their characters out.

  • @virilliquent6171
    @virilliquent6171 4 года назад +3

    I don't usually comment on Dnd Stories but this one is different. Bonzy struck a cord with me i never knew was there. His build and reasoning for being that way was heart breaking and... I felt eased by this. I myself have been nicknamed "The Giving Tree" once in grade school. I always helped people without a care for myself. My life has amounted to very little so far.. And Bonzy is a character i can connect with deeply. Im just glad to see that even the selfless can be memorable

  • @salvatorerapuano5560
    @salvatorerapuano5560 5 лет назад +5

    This actually hit me right in the feels, my eyes started watering

  • @messedupdweeb
    @messedupdweeb 5 лет назад +3

    This got me again, man. Sniffling at the end there. Props to the OP and to you. The deadpan delivery of the jokes were 👌🏼. 😂

  • @fashionsoulsonlysouls5575
    @fashionsoulsonlysouls5575 6 лет назад +59

    If I ever play DND, I’m making this character into a Paladin. Bonzy, the Depressed Clown Paladin.

    • @fashionsoulsonlysouls5575
      @fashionsoulsonlysouls5575 5 лет назад

      Wait, would a Warrior work better? Or is there even a God of clowns? Or being sad?

    • @DanateDMC
      @DanateDMC 5 лет назад +8

      Cleric, trickery domain for DnD 5e

    • @entropyzero5588
      @entropyzero5588 5 лет назад +7

      Honestly, this has more of a bard/ rogue vibe to me…

    • @Budew-ef6tr
      @Budew-ef6tr 5 лет назад +11

      @@entropyzero5588 Definitely a dex gloom bard.

    • @fashionsoulsonlysouls5575
      @fashionsoulsonlysouls5575 5 лет назад

      「Funny Valentine」 thanks comrade

  • @thomass2505
    @thomass2505 6 лет назад +11

    I want to give bonzy a hug

  • @fatcoyote2
    @fatcoyote2 6 лет назад +6

    The Suzy thing was one of the greatest things I've ever heard a character say.

  • @manueltoney7702
    @manueltoney7702 6 лет назад +37

    Your gm sounds like a person you should listen to and not piss off. I am frightend.

  • @Belias10
    @Belias10 6 лет назад +11

    I'm not crying, you're crying!

  • @OMartinez91
    @OMartinez91 5 часов назад

    I love revisit this story once in a while

  • @raveney3689
    @raveney3689 5 лет назад +2

    Man the first opening lines of this made me laughing so hard at trigger an asthma attack. Beautiful ❤️

  • @ThatGoblinShow
    @ThatGoblinShow 6 лет назад +16

    Almost like a Rorshack like character

  • @RainbowDash1995
    @RainbowDash1995 5 лет назад +1

    Oh God I laughed way to hard till the end, I honestly think I might cry, Bravo to you sir. What a fantastic character!

  • @aykay521
    @aykay521 5 лет назад +3

    Best last noise ever
    " *honk* "

  • @Budew-ef6tr
    @Budew-ef6tr 5 лет назад +2

    This was a absolutely beautiful story. Thank you for this.

  • @enoughofyourkoicarp
    @enoughofyourkoicarp 5 лет назад +2

    Every time I hear this story I tear up at the end.

  • @wraithreaper22
    @wraithreaper22 5 лет назад +5

    I'm still crying over Oogie

  • @jacksonramos5684
    @jacksonramos5684 6 лет назад +4

    Made me lose a small piece of myself at the end

  • @Skwisgar2322
    @Skwisgar2322 6 лет назад +10

    I have never been more wrong then when I said "we got this" in a Call of Cthulhu game...sooooooo wrong. I ended up personally killing 3/4 of the team under the control of a zombie samurai.

    • @Skwisgar2322
      @Skwisgar2322 6 лет назад +2

      Then there was the time i took out the BBEG with a WWII grenade...while he was holding an innocent 17yo girl and her 13yo sister hostage....the rest of the team was mad, I was like, "hay, it killed him, didn't it?"

  • @tristianlefebvre1878
    @tristianlefebvre1878 2 года назад +2

    ... I just realized. What if Susie was Bonzy the sad Clowns Daughter? The joy of his life take by cancer?

  • @pennhooven8844
    @pennhooven8844 5 лет назад +1

    When Bonzy made his first joke, no joke, I laughed so hard I almost fell out of my chair. This is gonna be good!!!

  • @cookieaddict5956
    @cookieaddict5956 5 лет назад +2

    The ending honestly made me cry😭

  • @noxnexus6953
    @noxnexus6953 5 лет назад +1

    just finished the video. I'm so sorry Bonzy

  • @rowanash5378
    @rowanash5378 5 лет назад +1

    Well then... That went from hilariously depressing to legitimately depressing.

  • @TheBronzeDog
    @TheBronzeDog 5 лет назад +3

    Laughed till I cried and cried until I laughed. Not a common occurrence.

  • @pawthorne7089
    @pawthorne7089 5 лет назад +2

    This channel... I like it!

  • @RawkLobstah88
    @RawkLobstah88 5 лет назад +1

    God, I love these dark jokes so damn much. I lost it at the Suzy ones.

  • @no1important777
    @no1important777 5 лет назад +3

    knock knock, whos there.
    *not suzy*
    dark, but i laughed a lot at that one.

  • @mudkinpz4682
    @mudkinpz4682 5 лет назад +4

    I feel bad about laughing at the Susie joke that he opened with, now that I finished the video

  • @benhramiak8781
    @benhramiak8781 6 лет назад +7

    Brilliant.

  • @iamomega7402
    @iamomega7402 5 лет назад

    Now i don't subscribe to many channels, but holy shit, after just a few of these videos, you definitely earned the sub.

  • @yasminafarih3681
    @yasminafarih3681 6 лет назад +17

    I don't get how Bonzy made the DM less angry.
    Explain?

    • @madraptor8936
      @madraptor8936 5 лет назад +13

      yasmina farih likely guilt, or something like that.

    • @glassedmemories3373
      @glassedmemories3373 5 лет назад +14

      He probably found the character fun and amusing

    • @QuantemDeconstructor
      @QuantemDeconstructor 5 лет назад +6

      Hoooonk

    • @DwarfyDoodad
      @DwarfyDoodad 5 лет назад +4

      Probably less stupid PIs and Ex Army Men, Esoteric Professors, and the stereotypical Call of Cthulhu characters, which means they are the ones least likely to come up as even character concepts. Especially if the players are treating CoC like Dungeons and Dragons or Pathfinder where they are murder hobos.
      Call of Cthulhu is *not* like D&D and punishes you for treating the game like D&D and the DM should as well.

  • @jerroldsmith2489
    @jerroldsmith2489 6 лет назад +4

    Bonzy makes me laugh too much

  • @adamcohill1617
    @adamcohill1617 4 года назад +3

    "managed to maintain sobriety without withdrawal." How do u do this I'm trying to figure this out irl

  • @afeliskdistell5963
    @afeliskdistell5963 4 года назад

    I never get tired of this story

  • @technoalchemist4402
    @technoalchemist4402 5 лет назад +3

    I feel like he’s a more depressed Gamzee

  • @Fakenit66
    @Fakenit66 5 лет назад +1

    I want to see a Bonzy the Clown film, starring Steven Wright as Bonzy.

    • @Deamons64
      @Deamons64 5 лет назад

      Fakenit66 that would be too amazing.

  • @nathanbenavidez7329
    @nathanbenavidez7329 5 лет назад +6

    I've made the little Susy joke irl and I mean all of them

  • @spinyjustspiny3289
    @spinyjustspiny3289 3 года назад

    I love that, because Bonzy's been dealing with a lot of shit he tries to cope with over the years, he's so conditioned to accept violence that he can crank out one-liners faster than most people can sneeze during allergy season.

  • @jessechavez5602
    @jessechavez5602 5 лет назад

    Bonzy is a beautiful character who needs more appreciation

  • @waffleless
    @waffleless 6 лет назад +9

    How do you lose BOTH arms to cancer?

    • @coyotearmory
      @coyotearmory 6 лет назад +4

      waffleless when the doctor is dyslexic.

    • @waffleless
      @waffleless 6 лет назад +3

      Grease.E coyote Doctor: “Lol whoops”

  • @generalmccornflaxbo2547
    @generalmccornflaxbo2547 5 лет назад

    God damn, that was somehow simultaneously one of tge most funney and sad stories I've ever heard.

  • @tdthedevilsrighthand712
    @tdthedevilsrighthand712 4 года назад

    I require a movie of this.

  • @adamcohill1617
    @adamcohill1617 4 года назад +1

    The "honk" thing would get quite annoying I love it...m

  • @submarineinthesky8946
    @submarineinthesky8946 5 лет назад

    AWW alright bonzy seriously had me tearing up there. Especially with the Suzy bit.

  • @Jack-lo5me
    @Jack-lo5me Год назад +1

    Rule 9 of DnD;
    If your GM is playing a hard game… make a character to interest them. If your interesting enough, 9/10 times, you will be given leniency so the GM can see where its all going.

  • @travishutson9012
    @travishutson9012 5 лет назад +1

    SO many feels

  • @pawemackowski451
    @pawemackowski451 2 года назад

    Love this story.

  • @curtgavin7845
    @curtgavin7845 5 лет назад

    Dude your awesome keep doing what your doing! Excellent VA and really good story instant subscribe 🙌

  • @BigDictator5335
    @BigDictator5335 5 лет назад +1

    Why is it always a cult trying to summon the doomsday demon? Most of the cults in the Cthulhu Mythos were content to do weird magic shit in secret and only occasionaly sacrifice people.

  • @williamwest3380
    @williamwest3380 5 лет назад

    One of the best stories ever

  • @crazygamer646
    @crazygamer646 4 года назад

    There must be something wrong with me I laugh at a lot of this man

  • @MFinGonzo
    @MFinGonzo 5 лет назад

    What a great story. Was not prepared to feel things today.

  • @samwhary5498
    @samwhary5498 4 года назад

    I cry every time... it's still so good

  • @benhramiak8781
    @benhramiak8781 5 лет назад +1

    I love this idea. Clown as a D&D character. Bard/rogue?

  • @allancornell2191
    @allancornell2191 3 года назад

    Of course they couldn't find bonzy. He was welcomed into The Great Dark Carnival.
    And wicked clowns...
    NEVER
    Die.

  • @Kohdok
    @Kohdok 5 лет назад

    Oh my God this is the best character!

  • @reddir
    @reddir 5 лет назад

    My second time listening to this, and I am still tearing up.

  • @Nyrufa
    @Nyrufa 6 лет назад

    Even the Old Ones don't fuck with clowns!

  • @wraithreaper22
    @wraithreaper22 5 лет назад

    Didn't expect to cry at the end of this. Damn you

  • @GreenStuffConsumer
    @GreenStuffConsumer 5 лет назад +1

    Bonzy sounds like an 80s badass

  • @WorldWalker128
    @WorldWalker128 5 лет назад

    I never thought I'd pity a clown.

  • @monkeydragonson9851
    @monkeydragonson9851 5 лет назад

    I’m a horrible person and I love it

  • @Raurie4
    @Raurie4 5 лет назад +1

    jesus i'm not even half way threw yet and already i want to play a character like this. maybe one day i'll get to play that ghoul clown in a fallout RPG

  • @noelhutchins7366
    @noelhutchins7366 5 лет назад

    Half dead half
    sad: just expressions'
    swords'; pivots...

  • @K.J.Saunders
    @K.J.Saunders 5 лет назад

    That was beautifull im actally crying.

  • @Sparrow_Bloodhunter
    @Sparrow_Bloodhunter 5 лет назад

    I'm not crying, I just got something in my eye.

  • @gwyndolin1536
    @gwyndolin1536 5 лет назад +5

    But I AM Pagliacci......

  • @arizonaranger9189
    @arizonaranger9189 3 года назад

    I love you Bonzy

  • @Cernumospete
    @Cernumospete 5 лет назад

    He really needs to meet old man Henderson.

    • @PRGME7
      @PRGME7 Год назад

      I have a feeling they wouldn’t get along.

  • @ratgutsnorthwind9154
    @ratgutsnorthwind9154 5 лет назад

    This is flawless