Table News: Birds, Bees, and Fish
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- Опубликовано: 29 сен 2024
- Bees are fish and birds need the lights off? The news got weird again this week.
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I love how much attention Ben pays to the layout of the table. Everybody looks in different directions to talk to different people.
Someone should make a diagram of where each state is sitting.
@@TheInvisibleCanadia I’m 99% sure Florida and Gov are across from each other, but I can’t decide wether the table is round or rectangular.
@@TheInvisibleCanadia Ben has one
@@ZoellaFischerVA Wait does he really when was it mentioned???
WhaAt?!
I can't be the only one that was as confused as Florida about a train hitting a hot air balloon
no iwas to
Trust me you're not m8. I'm still tryna figure out which one was on who's turf and I watched this 8 times
It's not even the first time this year, a Train hit a Plane in the spring.
As a Florida man ill explain it for you, balloon start low,gets high, it breaks goes low again, train goes low,train booms balloon. K?
@@necessaryevile so the balloon just crashed on the rails and peoples are making the story seem more complicated than it is?
"Why can't my dad love me?"
I felt that.
The amount of information I just consumed from a 4 minute skit is astounding. Phenomenal work as always Ben
As someone from arizona I would like to say that new mexico still recognizes pluto as a planet.
Yes 😂
I was just raised by a gen x, i think it's a plant
Fun fact about the birds/lights thing! The CN Tower (in Toronto, Canada) dims its lights during migration season! It's optional, but they do it!
I was very much expecting the other states to chime in about bloopers/have a conversation during the bloopers. Sorta forgot they were all the same person for a second.
as always, the bloopers are my favorite XD. Ok, I lied. All of this was my favorite, but I REALLY enjoy that you put the bloopers in here too.
Weird idaho laws please
1 it is illegal on sunday for a snake to bite a human unless it is snowing
2 it is illegal to fish off a camel's back
3 its also illegal to fish off of a giraffe's back
4 lawyers must not charge widows for moving there piano from one room to the next
5 you many not fish off an alligators back either
What happened for that 4th one to be needed?
Florida gonna have a great time with the 5th one. But a camel? Come on what if the big dude likes to fish?
How are they going to enforce the first one?
As someone who's lived in Southern Missouri for a short while, I can confirm the existence of the Uranus Fudge Factory🤣
LETS GO ACTUALLY FUNNY POLITICAL SATIRE
“the WHAT??” Made me laughing 😊😊😊
I think Texas needs a hug 1:09
I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTE 😭
Every week i come back to the table to learn what happened in the last week within 5-10 minutes
I related so much with Texas @1:07 to 1:09
This is the only way I get news
A catfish ended up on the sidewalk at my school in MN
So let's talk about the energy bills in Texas and how that might relate to federal issues. Yes, Texas's electrical grid is not connected to the national one, BUT the resources that are used to power the grid in Texas (coal, natural gas, etc) are all substances that are part of the national logistical infrastructure. So if the Feds decide to restrict oil extraction to sources that are either used up or unusable, then that is absolutely something that the Fed can change.
Yeah but they haven't done that. They've actually allowed for more extraction in more places. So there is nothing they can really do to help with pricing in Texas that they haven't already done. If Texas were on the National grid they could send them power from out of state. It's too bad that we didn't manage a greater transition to sources of energy that don't need to be dug out of the ground and shipped long distances to use. Someone 20 years ago screamed about the economy and coal jobs and now we are still greatly dependent on the global market price and vulnerable to supply chain issues. Instead of having a source of power as a majority component that is crazy cheap and doesn't explode when mishandled or accidentally leak in transit and poison the water supply and kill of wildlife. Plus bonus effect of having less asthma in the world due to reduced refining pollution. I've been to refinery towns and it's rather bleak.
There really is no reason we shouldn't have built up significant supplemental green energy supply by now. Texas is doing well to install wind in places but we are decades behind where we could have been.
We were just at Uranus. Wjat a hoot.
Amazing /s
Nah but a skit on my birthday is fantastic, thanks for all the giggles!! ❤️❤️❤️
"How did it get this weird this quick?"
Well, Florida's involved, so...
“But Ted Cruz said!-“ “I’m sure he did.” Comedy gold
As a Texan (An accepting one) the last one about the Dad feels to accurate.
Aw, New York and the puppies. The crabby person hiding they're a big softie.
As an Arizona I do agree we need Justice for Pluto
You should do a video on Minnesota
Absolute gold!
I am very confused by Missouris shirt. I require explanation
As extreme as those kind of requirements are... I kinda get where Ohio is coming from. 🤔
I love these vids so much
Glad to see Ohio for once
Chicken 🍗
Y E S
is ... is Missouri the Florida of the Midwest ??? There's a solid case for that to be true.
sometimes i forget they are all you
i mean you are all them
i mean you do um all
wait that came out wrong
hugs
Hey could you please put New Hampshire in one of your videos
can you do one about a kid in olando florida has a feaney for punching a police offcer
"If bees can be fish and girls can be boys, then why can't my dad love me?"
I never thought I would say this, but I relate to Texas on a spiritual level. There's a reason us cowgirls like to sing sad songs.
I really felt when California said, “I thought I was going to have to fight you, but now I feel like I should hug you.”
I guess Mexico is Texas's Dad?
I don't know if Texas realizes that Dad is Mexico and Spain is Grandpa. With France as a step-grandpa.
And have a ton of daddy issues, Florida loves us some texas sized daddy issues
@@Juice1984 And Florida is Texas's uncle
Loui summed up the "bees as fish comment perfectly with, "Used to bees!" He's quite philosophical!
we all are down here
"If bees can be fish and girls can be boys, then why can't my dad love me?"
the whiplash on this one is high ...
I’m so glad that you mentioned that Pluto is still always a planet in Arizona, including Northern Arizona.
Can you loop me in on this one? I haven’t heard this before.
@Rapunzel ♪ who
ASKED
As someone from Arizona who's actually been to the observatory where they found Pluto Pluto is a planet and will always be in our hearts
Those of us who grew up in Flagstaff will die on that hill that Pluto is a planet
@@ElijahNMitchell I'm happy you guys get snow, at least.
"But Ted Cruz Said" "I'm sure he did". Got me so good
Lmao
Texas's dad not loving him really explains a lot. Poor guy.
if I may recommend, check out God save Texas by Lawrence Wright,. The book is a bit tongue and cheek but describes why Texas is the way it is really well.
It's more accurate to say that Texas doesn't like Mexico.
Like him having DID. He's like MoonKnight
Ben’s filming these using natural light and they look amazing.
@Rapunzel ♪ Stop spamming or ich anchluss du
Florida’s explanation of the fish in the parking lot🤣
I hate that i understood that
“If bees can be fish and girls can be boys then why can’t my dad love me?”
I choked on my Gatorade, poor Texas
Texas saying his dad doesn't love him hit me like the train hit the hot air balloon.
thank you so much for keeping up this series! it makes my day whenever i see an update :)
As an Ohioan, I got really excited to see Ohio show up
Then I realized why we showed up
Yeah… sorry.
added to the list of reasons why Michigan is better than Ohio.
Can you release your plan on world domination then?
@@LeakyTrees I will throw a coffee table at you /j
@@darthmaul216 I'd like to, but it's classified and they will send Brutus after me if I reveal anything related to it
For a second there, I thought Florida was gonna say “Fish die” instead of “Glub glub.”
Don't worry many Californians are wondering why our politicians didn't just add more laws to protect the bees instead of reclassifying them as fish too.
Easier solution. One quick reclassification which requires very little red tape, or several laws that require a ton of red tape each.
@@ryanflake3481 copy paste? or just add bees to the list of things to protect?
@@walkingvirus487 Yeah, but bills are a pain in the ass to get through the (state) House and (state) Senate, and you just _know_ the GOP in California is going to throw a culture war hissy fit if you try to do anything that protects anything that's not corporate.
Yeah, there’s going to come a time when we need to conserve other insects and loophole with need to be rectified
@@aldenheterodyne2833 California is ran by dems the GOP blowback doesn't matter here
California considers bees fish wow and also it's now confirmed Texas isn't loved by his dad and that is also a perfect route into my question are you considering doing more countries at the table if so I recommend Britain France and maybe Mexico since they are parents to loads of state's also I consider the states that used to be part of Mexico to be Mexico's kids and Spain to be the grandad also also I know alaska hawaii and Florida have different parents.
Flordia has mentioned Spain as his dad in past.
@@Lolfuny ya if Spain does show up I really would want to see how the rest of them would try to return Florida.
Louisiana has a different parent too.. though he's likely been disowned entirely
@@Celticrose9999 I consider France to Louisianas parent.
have you herad the good word of commas and full stops/periods
When he talked about Ohio being late O thought he was gunna talk about the massive floods that have happened the last couple of weeks (that took out our fence and nearly got some of our animals) but what he actually talked about was a lot worse
for real, ohio weather can't make up its mind. where i live, most days are too hot to go outside and the other half are thunderstorms with tornado warnings. we've had to hide in our basement multiple times while up to our ankles in water
@homo weirdus yeah, just last night we had a major storm that blew away all of our porch furniture :(
Florida was ready to invoke more chaos after he heard of the Uranus Fudge factory lmao.
Man, you make me laugh out loud and a minute later, grimace and shake my head. It's a roller coaster ride living in this country right now, and not a fun one.
Neat fact: PA has the second highest count of banned books in the US. But no one ever quite talks about that.
Edit to Add: Texas leads with 713 at time of writing. Pennsylvania has 456.
ETA 2: EB: The major thing that really shocks me here is PA is an admittedly swing state, but blue leaning. So the fact we out pace 48 other states in number of banned books is really bizarre to me. 3rd place is Florida, with less than half of PA's (204 ATOW).
PA's weird. We also still have prohibition, we just put in so many loopholes that Swiss cheese is jealous.
Why am I just now learning about the banned books?!? 😳 and not that surprised about the prohibition.
@@Firehawk376 it's not so much prohibition as it is stupidly restricted liquor laws. There are steps to loosen up restrictions every couple years though. Like curiada and some.others can get bottles of spirits delivered directly now. We don't need state stores exclusively for it. And we don't need the city beverage distributors for beer anymore either.
@@TheTrueUlfhednar Like I said: Prohibition with infinite loopholes.
Honestly I know that probably all states have some books that are banned and there's probably more banned books than I'm even aware of it, but the idea of it is kinda scary. I think we attach a LOT of very dictatorial leadership to the idea of book banning and stuff. I don't know what's banned in those states, but I hope you guys can work towards unbanning anything that is actually good. (Sorry I realize it sounds like useless fluff I'm just... not in those states and have no clue)
Florida had to return to the caveman days to teach the government something simple.
so Texas' dad? Mexico? theres an interesting relationship dive
I was just thinking that. Also, his brother, New Mexico, would be the family favorite and successor who took on dad's name as a junior. California is the black sheep and Nevada's the fraternal twin that California doesn't want folks to pay attention to.
I feel like I should slap Ohio, who’s with me?
Michigan has joined the chat
@@curiousKuro16 you wanna go first Michigan?
@@Chaotic1King lol I'm from Indiana
The happy pride month at the end got me lol! Shows how much they don’t care
All jokes aside, I have stopped at Uranus MO and picked up some fudge. They have some of the best fudge I’ve ever had.
this one was chuck full of laughs , puns and Florida miming fish!🐟🐝
And in weekly table news that ben didn't see this week: A man in Oklahoma City scaled a 52 story building without any equipment, in a spiderman suit. He called himself the Spiderman pro live activist.
Just thought someone might find that interesting.
I always enjoy it when I see MO in a vid. Still waiting for the "Missouri Joins the Table" video to see exactly how bad the rest of the country sees us.
My "best case" scenario for that is a "missour-ee" / missour-uh" dual identity, like Texas / Austin .... but that would be dipping in the same well too often, probably.
@@Partstim or in the same vein like a STL/KC vs MO type thing
2:19 Gov is starting to get smart-
YAY!! Arizona is in a sketch! It’s been to long. The only reason why I even know we only have 8 planets is because my 3rd grade teacher embraced it in us. Seriously she was very strict when it came to Pluto not being a planet. We still say it is tho
y’all, we need to pray for texas 💀
I love how you mentioned the thing in Ohio. When I found that out I was pissed.
That’s way too personal for fucking children, they should be aloud privacy.
Yes, Uranus Missouri is a real place and they have a fudge factory there... They know what they are doing.
It saddens me that Indiana decided to copy this with our own town named Uranus that also has a fudge factory. We're so unoriginal
I went there on my way to Neosho, MO. I have never laughed so hard 😭 Just know, if I ever say that I’m mature, I’m lying 😂
damn... happy pride month i guess... yeah ... thats about right...
I like to think that Texas was referring to Mexico being his father.
Oh, and Wisconsin "the balloon hit the Canadian train!" The poor NTSB is trying to figure out how it happened! The rest of us are wondering "Why? Do they expect something like this to happen again?
At least the 3 injured people are out of the hospital. I guess the train is okay?
These are soooo funny! Thank you so much for giving me a moment to enlighten and laugh at my day! You should add Iowa to The Table next.
Anytime Florida is at the table, it gets that weird that quick.
Florida is almost always at the table.
As a Missourian, it was good to finally see us again! Hope we get a Welcome to the table at sone point. Also, Pluto will ALWAYS be a planet, you don't have to be Arizona to know that!
Justice for Pluto!
No. Pluto is not a planet
As an Oregonian. I always get happy when Oregon shows up. These skits are amazing.
I love it when GOV gets a win. They're so rare!
Aaaaaaaaaand this is why I’m moving to Michigan from Ohio… go blue, at least we’re not you
finally, a motto I can get behind
If you also live in Missouri you know that even when we are mentioned everyone looks right over us. like we are not even apart of the country.
I’m a trans boy, this hurt me in my soul, it was still funny though
This one was all over the damn place. Can't wait to see how you split this one into parts for Shorts and TikTok.
I was born in Arkansas, and lived in Texas for about two years, and it sucks to see them be the bad guys. I get why, and they 100% deserve to be the bad guys, but it’s still sad that I can’t be as proud to be from or to have lived in these places.
Same! I have some sort of love for my southern home states, but man it sucks how much they suck! Though I’m still living down here as a person who leans democrat and the pressure living in a small town in the south with that point of view. It’s hard sometimes.
I just blissfully ignore the bad and focus on the BBQ 🙂
@@introvertedasheck I feel that!
Don't worry, in a hundred years history will be more proud of TX than CA or NY
@@andrewrodgers8596 I highly doubt that unless every state you mentioned does basically a complete 180.
texas wanting his father to love him is a jab at the government and texas never really having a great relationship lol
Thank you sooooo much for talking about Trans issues without being discriminatory or making them the butt of a joke!
"Storm big, water high, parking lot flood, fish swim, glub glub." I laughed way harder at that than I expected to in the setup.
Day 10 of asking Ben to do a collab with Thomas Sanders
Even though your dad doesn't love you, we love you, Ben!!!
Something these states forcing girls even suspected of being trans to prove they’re not via testosterone levels don’t realize is that there is a *fairly common* female reproductive syndrome which can cause elevated testosterone levels! That’s syndrome is PCOS or Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. My testosterone level has been really high since 8th grade & even after removal of one ovary it is still above normal for females. PCOS causes extremely painful ovarian cysts & can also cause: weight gain resistive to weight loss/exercise, cystic acne(can cause scaring), facial hair, darkening of the skin around the neck, insulin resistance(leading to high/low blood sugar & even diabetes), extremely severe heavy periods(lasting 1-3+wks & sometimes for months), anemia, serious weight loss, fatigue, possible infertility, depression, mood swings & much more. So in trying to “protect” girls they very well could cause girls already suffering physically, mentally & socially even worse harm! PCOS in jr high & high school females significantly increases their suicide risk…imagine what being accused of being trans in these school systems where it’s made out to be something horrible could/would do to such females!
Before anyone says “well a dr can explain it”…WHY should a girl be FORCED discuss & to give her dr permission to discuss her most intimate medical details at a school board meeting?!? That’s humiliating all on its own & an incredibly severe invasion of privacy!🤬 I would’ve been mortified!
Endometriosis is another common reproductive system disease which can cause elevated testosterone levels. It cause extremely painful periods, constant daily pain, extremely heavy cycles, possible infertility & much more. What’s worse is the fact that PCOS *AND* endometriosis are commonly found together in the same patient! That was what occurred in my case & Im unable to have children despite having spent 10yrs trying everything. But having both made my jr high yrs hell. I got on a birth control which stopped my cycle in high school which helped stop most of the pain & decreased many other symptoms. But it’s possible that stopping my cycle for so long may have worsened my infertility. So girls shouldn’t be forced down that path but they also should be allowed access to it if it is their choice!
There are also other medical issues which can cause high testosterone in females but they’re more rare.
- It’s horribly ironic that Republican politicians claim requiring a vaccine is forcing unwanted medical treatment onto kids. Yet then they go & require girls go thru invasive testing, exams & questioning to play a sport.🤨🤨
THIS.
In Missouri we have a town named tightwad. And they have a “tightwad bank.”
They ain’t banning books, just banning them being used by teachers in an educational context.
This was three minutes of pure amazing that have totally brightened my day! Thank you!
Texan here, whoops looks like we revealed our trauma lol
if people are worried about trans kids playing sports couldnt they just ask for the accused kid's birth certificate instead of these weird tests or would that not be possible?
Maybe they could not be worried about kids wanting to play sports
(thinks deeply about a "birds and the fish" book) I think I have an idea!!! (in my best Florida voice)
1:26 oh like how they banned Huckeberry finn
Is it the intent to make Florida the underdog hero we all want AND deserve?
Florida confused but he got the spirit
Still love the moment he talked about sleeping in the governors back yard. The chaotic deuteragonist we all love
I feel like we glossed over the train-hot-air-balloon situation a bit...
Also Texas just really threw me off with that comment 😭 I don't generally like him but now I just feel bad
As a citizen from another nation, this is highly educative and entertaining to learn about United States.
I have been binging your contents and loving them all.
So if you want something... fun for PA 2 folks had to be rescued on thursday from a vat of chocolate at the Etown M&M Mars factory.
I have a genius idea to fix the gas prices:
Drill Oil
PS. You can use coal for cheap energy and then have a filter to prvent emissions.