@@thestranger1475 They're talking about partners that enables their family bullying their partners by not speaking up . Seon is a good partner, his father isn't.
@@thestranger1475the person is saying do not get in between your partners family to handle things they know there family more. Always support your partner in there decisions involving family they know them better then you. He knew that ignoring his mom’s crap would cause her to keep getting worse. He wanted to nip it in the butt at the beginning but op had to much pride so op tried to handle it but it turned into a game for the mom and ex
@@rachelcrawford1977 That’s also my view too. I misread his comment, I thought the comment was calling out the husband for not supporting OP’s stance. I read it again and realised my mistake.
@@sgv0719 I remember another story where OP was "trying to be apolitical" with his Maga wife. The comments roasted him for supporting her until it effected him, and he couldn't see how "not choosing" was a choice to support her. It's not just in ab.use cases, but in most cases.
@Maninawig What? That's crazy. We are talking about abusive relationships. Respecting people with different political views, whether they lean left or right, is the mature and rational way to act. I mean, why on Earth would he antagonize his wife if he doesn't really care about politics?
It mind boggles me when so many MILs, SILs, BILs and FILs (mostly MILs) go nuts when it comes thinking their kids are dating/marrying wrong. Which quite frankly is none of their business, AND honestly cruel sometimes.
I honestly just wish it wasn't so common. My grandmother on my mother side was nuts too (though thankfully she still retained enough common sense to not be overly hostile to my father despite both being on the controlling side of the spectrum). Don't get me wrong, I loved her to bits, but I know she would have preferred my mother married someone else. I'm just glad my grandparents on my father's side loved my mom. Even if they were cold and strict most of the time, I wish I could have spent more time with them.
And it seems they always do for wrong reasons (no one cares when the person really is wrong by being abusive/toxic?) Like, sometimes outside perspective is needed to see some red flags, but some people took it too far...
Its the control freaks who act like that, who have never had any boundaries set by anyone before. All of this could have been easily avoided if Sean told his mother that he simply will not attend any party the ex is invited to and will go NC instantly if the mother brings it up. If you cannot set boundaries to your parents, then the crazy ones will try to force their own stupid rules, expectations and behaviors on you. My own mother tried for years with all kind of bs, but I remained strong with my own boundaries and she quit trying when she realized I cannot be swayed. And if they can't respect your boundaries, then you need to go NC instantly. No matter who the person is to you, close friend, mom/dad, siblings, you just cut them off from your life if they show with actions that they're not going to respect you and your boundaries. Otherwise you keep on feeding and enabling their bad behavior. The sooner people would realize that you don't need to keep the bad people around you at all, the sooner their lives will improve. And rarely give second chances, if they haven't changed at all when they claim that, then just go permanent NC. Blood means nothing if they can't respect you and your boundaries, literally absolutely nothing because a stranger can treat you with more respect than close relative who you allow to act bad towards you.
@@DarkEinherjar the story is probably fake, but if real, she definitely should have said it caused pain and harm, went to the hospital, get diagnostics, and then slap the MIL and the EX with the hospital bills + actual assault/battery charges.
Since op said that the only repercussions were damaged clothing, I don't think it was hot. At worst it was warm. But you're right, it if was hot coffee op could've ended up burned. A restraining order is definitely needed
@@DarkEinherjar doesn't matter if it causes pain or harm anymore. ever since the mcdonald incident in I believe '94 they have treated throwing coffee at someone as an assault charge no matter what temp the coffee is at. only in tv and movies is in not an assault charge because writers never know anything about laws or such and just keep using the same old tropes.
I agree out of everyone he is the biggest villain. Fathers who decide to stay out of the drama instead of trying to fix things are the reason why things like this happen. I want to keep the peace by doing nothing. Sometimes doing nothing works but most of the time trying to actually help goes a long way for both the son and wife.
First backhand comment, Sean should have been TOTALLY clear that will not be tolerated. While my mom did not like my wife initially and I had dated my wife’s best friend before (there were three years and another in between) who she just adored, she would make comments and I would be silent and my wife didn’t want me to comment. 8 months into our relationship my mom made a passive aggressive statement toward my then fiancé and I blew up at her. My dad started on me and I blew up at him too. Surprised everyone at the party because that wasn’t me. Mom never disrespected her since.
Yeah if the partner never sets boundaries then it will just continue. It’s like how my dad stays quiet when his parents insult my mom which is why they think it’s okay to treat her like a slave but my uncle sets boundaries and they wouldn’t dare to do that to my aunt
Throwing even cold coffee in someone’s face is assault it’s not just a slap on the wrist and letting them go she could’ve took that all the way to the bank
I say that Sean was right to call out OP for putting her pride above his feelings over the entire thing with his mom and ex. All of this would've been avoided if she hadn't have been so stubborn.
@@jjm3437 fr. "Forced" him to stay quiet. I must've missed the part where she wrote she held a gun to his head and made him endure it all and never told her how it upset him in an adult conversation. Nothing ever stopped him from speaking up before, whether him and OP stayed together or not, he would've had this going on until he had enough, he should've put his foot down forever ago if he really wanted to. She didn't force shit.
@GabrielleHayes1921 have you considered that maybe her husband respects her enough to let her fight her own battles when she asks? He wanted to stand up for her, she told him to stop and likely would have been upset if he did it anyways. So he stopped. I get where youre coming from, but i dont really agree with assuming the worst of people you dont know 😅
@@Fishcat_Eddy I think the point they're making is that he could've talked with her and told her that even though she wanted to take care of it herself, it was still bothering him. In the end, both failed in communicating their feelings.
@6:50 When Sean called Sharon & Diane "Shallow & Trashy" 😏 his own mum and crazy EX-girlfriend of ten years. Good for you Sean. Show that shiny ✨ new spine for not allowing that disrespect to his WIFE.
Exactly! He should have completely ignored his wife's request to let her handle this because she's just as dumb, shallow and egotistical as his ex and mom.
@@truebrowncanadian It’s online, who gives a damn?? It’s so weird that showing your face online is so important to you: what does it matter? Why does it bother you so to the point you think someone a coward for not showing their face? I am showing my face and I wholeheartedly agree with their sentiments. What will you say now? 🙄
Yea, at least with how she worded it here, it sounds like their original conversation was about him speaking up on her behalf, which she declined. Which is fair enough on both their parts. But if it was also making him uncomfortable, he could have spoken to her about that and ultimately confronted the situation on his own behalf. Kind of sounds like he wanted to use his wife's discomfort to hide his own in any sort of confrontation with his ex and mother, and he got upset that she didn't let him do that.
Exactly. He should have been the man in the relationship and tore his mother a good one at the first sign of disrespect. It took me 8 months with the woman who is now my wife to rip my parents a new hole after my mom made backhand comments about my wife and my dad saying nothing.
Right! Then he's says it's her fault too like wtf. They have me pulling my hair out with their lack of communication like damn these two are so stupid.
Imagine how many other unspoken problems are happening. I hate people who suppress their feelings and act line everyone should just know what they are thinking and feeling. Speak up damn it!
Imagine being such an unhinged and mental bunch that your son/nephew/ex completely cuts you off after numerous warnings and you _still_ lack the insight to figure out not only that you did wrong but also what.
I’ve noticed a pattern with the mothers in these Reddit posts. 99% of the time they can never except that the people in their lives want nothing to do with them because of their actions. They always blame someone else
This story is definitely fake. It has too many of the usual code words like “taken aback” and errors like saying they received a text but then blocked the call for it to be real. That being said, yeah it’s definitely a pattern of mothers thinking they have total control over their children’s lives, then getting upset when their children finally fight back
I understand Shawn’s perspective but it’s not like op is a fucking mind reader; if he had such problems with it he should have brought it up? I get how people want their spouses to notice this stuff themselves and op had her vises too but I feel like Shawn should have brought this up if it got to the point he wanted to blow up. Don’t push stuff down and communicate guys!
I feel like ive seen a lot of comments trying to pin blame on shaun for reasons that to me make absolutely no sense. You say OP is not a mind reader but ffs it doesnt take kne to see how utterly stupid OP was in this whole scenario pre update. You act like shaun never brought this up in reality im sure he did countless times, we just arent told this but reasons i believe it to be the case are; 1. Every single time Shaun suggested either not going to a gathering entirely, cutting out his mum and ex snd avoiding the very damn party that was the reason for this post, OP consistently said no and ALWAYD sited her need to prove she doesnt care. She loved the taste of power she got from beating those 2 bozos at their own game, says as much too and once she realised she was "doing the right thing" to get that reaction she litetally couldnt stop. I have no doubt in my mind that they had to have had so many convos about it but had OP included that kn her post, she would have been reemed to shreds. Heck up until just before the updates she genuinely believed she had handled everything right when in feality she handled EVERYTHING wrong 😂 The fact that even after shaun basically pointed out everything, while accurately portioning blame where appropriate might i add OP still tried to invalidate his feelings, literally proving everything he said right in that moment, she continuously neglected him, ignored his suggestions and blatant asks not to visit his fam because she "knew the kind of people MIL and SIL are (semi-quoted) while conviniently forgetting SHAUN LITERALLY KNOWS THEM 😂. Im sorry but this to me, wasnt the kind of situation.where hsving to be mind reader was relavant at ALL, OP ignored every metric of Shaun trying to remkve her from the situation, im sure if he did complain, she pushed back and probably (now this is just my speculation based on the above) probably didnt because he wanted to respect her autonomy,.the same way his was NOT respected
Yes! They're both stupid legit. Having me pull my hair out of frustration like damn. At least talk to each other about their feelings. They don't have to have the convo in front of anyone else. Behind closed doors, they could have communicated properly as a couple, and this would've been done with immediately.
To avoid argument amongst all of the BS ? He respects her wife's(an adult woman) point of view . When the family was trying to separate them , it was utmost necessary to stick together. Sean was being matured enough by not making it a topic then. People have different ways of dealing with things . It's easy to hit . dialogues from faraway .The fact that people are still angry over the OP taking accountability for her actions..I wonder what would have happened if he called her out then . It would probably end up with a "Ok your family , deal it by yourself since you are so desperate to cut ties with them. At the end , people will call me a btch for hyping my husband to cut ties with his mothers👺👺👺"
Im sorry but how old you have to be to be aware that ridiculous behaviour like that is annoying? She engaged in those idiotic childish games... Its mind-blowing
7:00 Yeah, there's whole other reddit threads about the quiet person being pushed so far and having bottled up so much that when they finally snap its kinda spectacular. Also the ex-gf proudly showing off the promise ring from OP's husband years after their break-up was just pathetic.
To avoid argument amongst all of the BS ? He respects her wife's(an adult woman) point of view . When the family was trying to separate them , it was utmost necessary to stick together. Sean was being matured enough by not making it a topic then. People have different ways of dealing with things . It's easy to hit . dialogues from faraway .The fact that people are still angry over the OP taking accountability for her actions..I wonder what would have happened if he called her out then . It would probably end up with a "Ok your family , deal it by yourself since you are so desperate to cut ties with them. At the end , people will call me a btch for hyping my husband to cut ties with his mothers👺👺👺"
He actually did, but oop kept telling him not to do anything. That she “wanted to put it all behind her”. And honestly, she should’ve let him go nuclear on them, ex is a pathetic pick-me & mom’s a loser reliving her glory days through the ex.
@@Ldfyjhkjg If he respected her point of view he shouldn't have blamed it on her though. He made his choice so he needs to take responsibility. He can't pretend she made him do it if he chose to stay silent about how much it affected him.
She didn't want to prove she was not hurt. She wanted to show that she didn't care because when you show people like that that they are affecting you, they just get worse and more creative in insulting you but she never said it didn't bother her though.
@@juliab9596 she literally did say she was bothered, that's also why she kept seeing them. And also, the if "you don't give a reaction, they will stop" is bullcrap, saying it from experience
Typically, it’s the relative whose job it is to deal with drama from that side of the family. OP shouldn’t have forced him not to engage. But she def shouldn’t deal with any of this at all.
Story 1: The “Almost Anniversary” thing MIL and Ex pulled is just unhinged. It wasn’t a joke and they knew it. But yeah over the 4 years, Diane and Sharon were just pushing and pushing to see that could get away with until they finally pushed too far. Edit: Splashing coffee on OP??? Yeah these women are psycho and once again, they’re pushing to see what they can get away with again. OP and Sean need Restraining Orders
Why would the X go? It must be humiliated and desperate of her. Had they publicly told Diane that she looks pathetic and desperate and isn't attractive. Hubby is the only one that is right.
Okay, i get his point, BUT HE ALSO DIDN’T TALK TO HIS OWN MOTHER ABOUT IT FOR YEARS!! Like i know, he had to hold his tongue, but if he was really near the limits of his patience, then he should have said something to his wife about losing control. I didn't want to victim blame, but he also CHOSE not to talk about the treatment of his wife about the situation and i dont thick he should be left off so easy just because he was asked to hold his tongue.
Then everyone sucks here, him for not speaking about how the situation was making him feel sooner, OP for being too busy trying to look "unbothered" and not trying to think of how the situation was affecting her husband, MIL for not respecting her son and his wife and Ex for the same reason as MIL. But the biggest AH here is MIL 100%, she should want her son to be happy but is instead trying to ruin his marriage, she is the biggest AH in this list of AH. Ooh and I almost forgot, FIL to, for not trying to stop his wife.
He literally said something the first time, but she told him to back off and because he respected his wife, he did. Always partly the man’s fault on these stories. Even when he does what he’s told, “he should’ve done more!”
Listen, all I'm saying is that ESH! The husband did do as he was asked, which is great! However, he should have at least had a talk with OP about how he was feeling. There is nothing wrong with listening to your partner. However, if you haven't talked to your partner, how are they supposed to know you're mad at them and the situation. And clearly, this, wasn't they the only thing the Mil and Ex did. You don't just go from making harsh comments to buying a full gosh damn anniversary cake.
Dianne needs to get a grip. Clinging to a past relationship when the guy has already moved on and gotten married is beyond pathetic. She had her chance with him and she chose to toss him aside and go ho around.
Bro I love my mom endlessly but there’s no fkn way I’d be so weak as to let her disrespect my wife like this. That guy needed to grow a pair and handle that way sooner!
ESH. SEAN is a GROWN MAN who was the only one connected to this. OP just got brought in and defended herself how she saw fit. If he wanted it to end he only had to talk to OP and say for his own sake he wanted it over. Not push it onto OP as why it went on so long.
Umm no those are different? By not calling out the wrong, you are siding with the wrong . That's the FIL. Whereas the OP didn't call out the wrong because she took it to be a mental challenge. Tell me how it would be a mental challenge for the FIL . He wasn't the one getting bullied.
No way was the husband actually blaming OP for not entertaining the MIL and ex. They are the only ones who were in the wrong, did he want family drama at every event or something? FIL is also a giant coward
@@R5ForeverXx We know. It's just funny because it goes "I received a text. Sharon proceeded to scream at me for 15 minutes before i disconnected the call" like Sharon is calling from text.
Sean have very decent reason - he tried to respect his wife choce... Op on other hand tried to be cool but didn't noticed shes not in the middle school anymore so no one thinks shes cool at all
@@morganablackwater2017omfg ya’ll know you can respect your partner’s boundaries and STILL voice your issues ??? He isn’t mute, he can talk since he’s a grown adult.
Idk how anyone's blaming OP. She was doomed no matter which route she took on the matter, so chose the 'least' damaging one to her character and did nothing. SEAN on the other hand had nothing BUT time and place to have stopped this before it spanned YRS as it did. His apology in private and not public plus putting his mom and ex on the spot also was salt in the wounds. The only doormat here here is FIL for equally allowing this to happen when he too could've stopped it at the head. None of that should've went past a month at best let alone 4 YRS
It feels like you completely ignored all of OP's monumental fuckups to support yout rather strange claim that shaun "did nothing" did you even bother listening to the whole story? Even pre updates there was a LOT Op did wrong. 1. OP was in no way doomed no matter whst route she took, heck none of this whole post would have happened had OP heeded her husband's warnings and actually accept his attempts to disfance them from the situation. Did you forget that before they even went for the holiday dinner the first time, the husband suggested not to and OP decided to go anyway? Did you forget that once they had been subject to this nonsense for a while Husband suggested pulling back but OP literally says she was the one that advised against it because she "knew the kind of people MIL and SIL were and didnt want to be seen as weaker than them....heck the entire post pre updates reads like she constantly has a point to prove and she confirms this in the update..... Did you forget the fact that literally prior to the very party that kickstartef the post, husband literally warned against it AND wanted to go to another more important party, OP again with her unending pride said no and that its better yo go to the in lawd..... Are you also somehow forgetting that during the car ride to the party literally after the whole ordeal she tried to ask an OBVIOUSLY FRESHLY PISSED HUSBAND about the stupid situation that SHE caused..... Are you forgetting that after getting home from the other party which was the only source of solace for husband, Op AGAIN tried to talk about the situation, i mean read the room ffs 😂 And finally are you forgetting that during the argument sfter Shaun pours his heart out and explains how neglected she feels SHE STILL TRIED TO ARGUE WITH HIM and made it out like he was being harsh for simply expressing how neglected and hurt he felt, like his own autononmy was never respected throughout this whole experience, she STILL tried to invalidate him. I mean come ON.... Its like you completely ignored ALL of those issues so you could find reason to fault Shaun even thoigh OP continuously put her pride and ego above common sense, fighting with people she willingly (and rightfully) mocks and insults while being guilty of being just as dumb. Nah man im sorry but your take is lacking in context and nuance for sure
Y'll can't tolerate women taking accountability. Sean is a matured men who respects his wife's opinion. His wife told him to back off , he backed off .
“She creeps me out” vs “Stop harassing my wife/girlfriend” No, just no. He could’ve addressed how their behavior made *him* feel, not how *she* felt. What they were doing to *him* not to *her* as well. He could’ve addressed and dropped a lot, not blame op for being harassed by his family and ex. He absolutely had a point, but it curves and points straight back to himself in the end.
Maybe im in the minority but OP didn't do anything wrong. If Sean had that much of a problem, open your mouth and say it. Him giving her the cold shoulder was childish as hell.
She’s scary that’s what she did wrong she let them bully her for all those years bc she couldn’t stand up for herself and still couldn’t even after they tried to make her marriage look like a joke and even threw coffee on her she needs to learn how to defend herself and not let people get away with anything.
Am I the only one being happy af after watching this? Like…u know, it‘s actually heartwarming to see how a couple so much in love can overcome any shit thrown their way🥰
Keep us informed. Glad you are moving. I have heard that if you don’t want people to find you, you should buy your new property under a corporation name. That way PIs or detectives can't discover who owns your property. Look into it for your safety. Those two won't stop, obviously. They are feeding each others psychosis.
I think the husband is also at fault. He wasn’t “forced”. I understand going along with your gf wife or whoever else but he didn’t have to listen to op and go along with her. Why didn’t he chew his parents (mainly his mother) out every time she did what she did? OP it’s not the only one at fault here, thus everyone here sucks
@@BabyRho Here's how I see it. He should have spoken to OP about how the situation was making him feel way before blowing up and blaming her. There's nothing wrong with going along with OP's wishes to stay silent, but if it was bothering him that much he should have spoken to her about it again.
Well OP Just dumping everything on others, first she didn't care abt her husband feeling, stop him from interfering and let this silly mind games carry on, now she is blaming FIL. Wat a narcissistic wife.
Story one Sean is weak. He got fed up but then turned around and blamed it all his wife simply because she wanted to seem unbothered which is not wrong. As a man he should’ve handled it from day one. he should’ve taken charge. Tell his wife how he felt instead of accusing her years later of her, not caring about his feelings, blah blah, blah cry, cry, cry, tears, tears, tears weak weak weak.
I still don't understand why his bf would not be invited, not only is he his brothers long-term partner but he's been in her life since she was born so he's basically family, there's definitely another reason.
Ok yes she should have said something but is he a mute? How is it wrong that she tried to keep the peace with his mother? They owe each other an apology. His mother and the ex need to get over it and move on especially the obviously psycho ex. Talk about stuck in the past…. Sorry but FIL is useless. A real husband, not an enabler would have shut down her crap years ago. Again ex is nuts he better get a restraining order on both of them.
The FIL had a similar deny/uninvolved pattern as the OP. It’s not surprising FIL didn’t do anything otherwise he would have years ago. You can tell Sean was used to it and probably why he put up with his wife’s stoic behavior as a result. I thought it was kind of ironic OP didn’t like FIL behavior as it was similar to her own nonchalant attitude towards MIL and Diane.
There's a difference between wanting to act that way and being that way. It eats you inside, but for me who truly cannot care way less than I do, it doesn't affect me in anyway whatsoever
OP did nothing wrong, if her husband had a problem, he should have addressed it himself. OP would have gotten so much retaliation if she had said something.
They were both bad. OP literally kept talking to the mil and ex because she wanted to be chill, ignoring him the first time. They should of communicated.
OP, despite everything that had happened, the bright spot is that you found yourself a keeper. Honestly, the fact that he is willing to forgive you despite your own misstep (which is playing your MIL's petty game), that is a sign that you chose correctly. As for the MIL and her "best friend" (no idea what to call that other woman), them splashing coffee on OP is indeed malicious intent, and I don't want to shock people, but in certain countries, women do get splashed with concentrated acid from spurned suitors or jealous family members, so I always take this seriously. My guess is that cause they could not manipulate the husband any longer, OP became "the Great Satan" in their eyes for derailing their perfect image of a family. Good on OP and her husband to distance themselves, cause knowing these narcissists, they would not stop until they got that petty "I win" middle finger moment against OP.
As an ex that’s still close to the family, I’m sorry. I’ve made it very clear to the new GF that I’m in now way interested in my ex and he’s not interested in me. We do have a son, so idk if I’d still be around if not for that, but I am and it is what it is. But I feel like I am closer than just a coparenting relationship with his family. However, I am closer to his new GF than I am with him and have made sure to always keep communication open and give her and reassurance she needs from ME to feel safe. But that’s just how his family is. They are very much loving people and if they love you it’s forever unless you screw them over. This woman is just a witch. You can be close to an ex and ex IL family without being a nuisance.
Yeah, OP was wrong for not considering him, but Shawn could've spoken up as well. Lack of communication was largely at play. But nothing stopped Shawn from speaking with his mother personally and telling her to cut the sh*t years ago.
I will say that Sean shouldn’t have lost it at OP, but was making an entirely valid point. He should have talked to her sooner, and she should have realised.
I would lost it with her way sooner... The moment she explained her ridiculous way of thinking about that situation. It would be you either going to a therapy and sort yourself or Im gone. Thats middle schooler mindset that op has... Shes a red flag
I am confused to why the wife has to apologize to the husband for his bat shit crazy mother and ex girlfriend. If anything .. he should be trying to make it up to her! He should have been the man and stop this madness from the beginning
It took her 28 years to become nonchalant, and you expect her to change who she is in her core in one week time? Pathetic. Also, she did already change. Instead of staying passive, she pressed charges and went no contact. That's actively preventing them from hurting OP and her husband.
Im pretty sure he's talking about the "going public " incident , where she just wanted " to move on" and not humiliate those people I think he's right in a way , cause it still looks like she wants to act like it doesn't bother her.@@Nathan_Bookwurm
@Nathan_Bookwurm she's playing mind games with the two woman to show them she don't care. I don't think that's being nonchalant. She's playing a facade. And I never said anything about her going 180 but at least learned her to have some teeth when being pushed. You're pathetic just like them.
@@Nathan_Bookwurm she's previously playing mind games with them showing she don't care . that's not being non-chalant. she's making a facade, like she wants to them to show she's taking the higher ground. and i never said anything about her to go full 180 or go berserk or something. her stopping her husband from making a post is pretty much the same as her helding back which forces her husband to hold back as well. she's pathetic and she's dragging her husband down. you're pathetic, too.
I understand why people go no contact with family. Why would an old girlfriend want to still hang around when he had moved on. His mother is just STUPID.
Sean is right to call her out. Imagine he's trying to defend you and you want him to keep quiet. Like what do you wanna prove? Youre being so full of yourself too.
honestly he wasn't. that's not being full of yourself its called ignoring your bullies and not letting them get to you. she had every right to say just ignor the comments revolving around her as she is dealing with it. i dont think she ever told him he cant speak up for himself when they are targeting him or put a stop to that.
@@dobbiereals The problem here is that they aren't targeting him specifically though. Everything they did was indirectly affecting him as they were more focused on insulting and harassing his wife than him because her presence was not wanted. He couldn't defend himself because the battle is technically between his wife, his ex-gf, and his mother, and if he were to intervene, it would be to back up his wife. His wife, however, refused to shut it down and decided that she was just going to pretend to be unbothered and suck it up when she doesn't have to. This puts him in a hard place because the insults and harassing behavior was annoying him and preventing him from getting enjoyment from these family gatherings yet he couldn't say anything because his wife was so adamant that she can just handle it on her own. So here he is, having to sit here and listen to this dumb garbage because his wife wanted to act unbothered and pretend to be so cool and nonchalant. This isn't fair to him because who wants to sit there and watch someone they love dearly get mistreated all day? I think what makes it even more frustrating that it didn't have to be like this. This could have been stopped but his wife let her ego get in the way. How can he speak up for himself when none of the harassment was directly aimed at him? What is there for him to speak up about? All of it makes no sense so he had every right to get annoyed with his wife.
@@TheRainbowbeautiful Sean could have stood up for himself by speaking to his wife about his feelings rather than bottling them up and blaming her. She can't read his mind. They could have readdressed the situation and created a new action plan that honors both of them. Also, Sean's mom and Dianne's behavior predates his and OP's relationship, so he could have also shut down their behavior earlier. Ignoring your bullies is a common way to deal with them and OP acknowledged that Dianne and Sean's mom were trying to trigger her, so I don't think OP's approach is completely unfounded. After all, the insults were directed at her, so it would make sense that she would be focused on keeping herself calm. Again, she can't read his mind.
@@AintThatJustTheWay You have a valid point, however, I still don't think it makes sense for her to continue dealing with the situation when it could have easily been stopped. She even said herself that she has this urge to always remained unbothered and uncaring so, in my opinion, I still feel that she was putting him between a rock and a hard place. I understand the "ignoring your bullies" mentality well and it is effective, however, it doesn't make any sense for her to continue pushing for these interactions when these all could have been stopped. Let's be real: for her, it was a battle of egos. It wasn't just a tactic to defend herself against the bullies because she knew all of the options she had and STILL chose to deal with them in this fashion. Even if she can't read his mind, the fact that she continued with this mess for so long just shows that she has a bit of a ego problem that needed to be addressed. I do agree that I wish he would have spoke to his wife first but I'm sure that's because again, since she was so adamant, he didn't want to disrespect her and step on her toes. Regardless, you're right in that he should have been more communicative in the first place instead of bottling up his feelings and exploding. I think the point that I agree with the most is about the behavior predating before his wife and how he should have addressed it then. That is very true. He should have been nipped in the bud but he didn't want the conflict. I think we can successfully conclude that both of them had fault in this situation, whether someone believes it falls more on the wife or the husband. I think all of this is just another lesson of showing the importance of communication. Thank you for bringing those points to my attention. I didn't think about this way!
i dont see how her pretending it doesnt bother her would have any bearing on seans actions... I would put my mom in her place soooo fast if she said some dumb shit. My mom knows that though so she doesnt push me (we have a good relationship i promise lmao)
I’m sorry but that’s complete utter horse shit for Sean to blame op for what happened with his mother, what excuse would he use if his mom invited Diane anyway on her birthday?
I don’t think she’s th ah because she was being targeted but he definitely should have brought his feelings up sooner because allowing her to continue battling out despite knowing how he felt
That's why you let your partner deal with their family's bs. If they don't have ur back, they're not a good partner lmao.
I can’t tell if you’re blaming Sean because he’s a good partner, OP was in fault but It’s good they finally worked together…
@@thestranger1475 They're talking about partners that enables their family bullying their partners by not speaking up . Seon is a good partner, his father isn't.
@@lolmfs I see it now, I just horribly misread it.
@@thestranger1475the person is saying do not get in between your partners family to handle things they know there family more. Always support your partner in there decisions involving family they know them better then you. He knew that ignoring his mom’s crap would cause her to keep getting worse. He wanted to nip it in the butt at the beginning but op had to much pride so op tried to handle it but it turned into a game for the mom and ex
@@rachelcrawford1977 That’s also my view too. I misread his comment, I thought the comment was calling out the husband for not supporting OP’s stance. I read it again and realised my mistake.
Fun fact: no choice is a choice. By the FIL not stepping in, he's actually supporting his wife's antics.
Facts, complacency do be a helluva thing
Of course. In an abusive relationship, inaction means taking the abuser side. That includes siblings, parents, couples, etc.
@@sgv0719 I remember another story where OP was "trying to be apolitical" with his Maga wife. The comments roasted him for supporting her until it effected him, and he couldn't see how "not choosing" was a choice to support her.
It's not just in ab.use cases, but in most cases.
I agrée
Most of the Time not picking a side is a support for a side
@Maninawig What? That's crazy. We are talking about abusive relationships. Respecting people with different political views, whether they lean left or right, is the mature and rational way to act. I mean, why on Earth would he antagonize his wife if he doesn't really care about politics?
It mind boggles me when so many MILs, SILs, BILs and FILs (mostly MILs) go nuts when it comes thinking their kids are dating/marrying wrong. Which quite frankly is none of their business, AND honestly cruel sometimes.
I honestly just wish it wasn't so common. My grandmother on my mother side was nuts too (though thankfully she still retained enough common sense to not be overly hostile to my father despite both being on the controlling side of the spectrum). Don't get me wrong, I loved her to bits, but I know she would have preferred my mother married someone else.
I'm just glad my grandparents on my father's side loved my mom. Even if they were cold and strict most of the time, I wish I could have spent more time with them.
And it seems they always do for wrong reasons (no one cares when the person really is wrong by being abusive/toxic?)
Like, sometimes outside perspective is needed to see some red flags, but some people took it too far...
That's just how women are. Do you honestly expect anything different?
Its the control freaks who act like that, who have never had any boundaries set by anyone before. All of this could have been easily avoided if Sean told his mother that he simply will not attend any party the ex is invited to and will go NC instantly if the mother brings it up. If you cannot set boundaries to your parents, then the crazy ones will try to force their own stupid rules, expectations and behaviors on you. My own mother tried for years with all kind of bs, but I remained strong with my own boundaries and she quit trying when she realized I cannot be swayed.
And if they can't respect your boundaries, then you need to go NC instantly. No matter who the person is to you, close friend, mom/dad, siblings, you just cut them off from your life if they show with actions that they're not going to respect you and your boundaries. Otherwise you keep on feeding and enabling their bad behavior.
The sooner people would realize that you don't need to keep the bad people around you at all, the sooner their lives will improve. And rarely give second chances, if they haven't changed at all when they claim that, then just go permanent NC.
Blood means nothing if they can't respect you and your boundaries, literally absolutely nothing because a stranger can treat you with more respect than close relative who you allow to act bad towards you.
scientists discovered a sekrit spot wamynz have, that when hit with enough pressure, it makes a wamen do anything for you.
it’s called the face.
Was the coffee cold, because throwing hot coffee in someone's face is definitely intent to harm.
Probably warm since it could have been a moment waiting for OP to show up. She didn't say
It wasn't hot enough to cause any real harm, otherwise they would've been gotten way more than just a reprimand.
@@DarkEinherjar the story is probably fake, but if real, she definitely should have said it caused pain and harm, went to the hospital, get diagnostics, and then slap the MIL and the EX with the hospital bills + actual assault/battery charges.
Since op said that the only repercussions were damaged clothing, I don't think it was hot. At worst it was warm. But you're right, it if was hot coffee op could've ended up burned. A restraining order is definitely needed
@@DarkEinherjar doesn't matter if it causes pain or harm anymore. ever since the mcdonald incident in I believe '94 they have treated throwing coffee at someone as an assault charge no matter what temp the coffee is at. only in tv and movies is in not an assault charge because writers never know anything about laws or such and just keep using the same old tropes.
That FIL is so spinless. L of a father
He's just as toxic as his wife. The story doesn't say it, but if OP dug into Sean's past, she'd probably find a pattern of ab-se, neglect or both.
I agree out of everyone he is the biggest villain. Fathers who decide to stay out of the drama instead of trying to fix things are the reason why things like this happen. I want to keep the peace by doing nothing. Sometimes doing nothing works but most of the time trying to actually help goes a long way for both the son and wife.
He puts the L in FIL
@@horizonreaper3738 He is definitely not the biggest villain. Spineless yes.
MIL got that Gawk Gawk lvl300 to keep FIL mouth shut. Its like how people always say, the crazier the the bi**h, the juicier the cooch.
Remember, folks, the chillest person can also be the angriest person around. Fuck around enough you will find out harshly.
It’s the monster mother in law again. This sure reeks of toxicity and drama.
The term for this is "monster in law" I think
And fakeness.
First backhand comment, Sean should have been TOTALLY clear that will not be tolerated. While my mom did not like my wife initially and I had dated my wife’s best friend before (there were three years and another in between) who she just adored, she would make comments and I would be silent and my wife didn’t want me to comment. 8 months into our relationship my mom made a passive aggressive statement toward my then fiancé and I blew up at her. My dad started on me and I blew up at him too. Surprised everyone at the party because that wasn’t me. Mom never disrespected her since.
Yeah if the partner never sets boundaries then it will just continue. It’s like how my dad stays quiet when his parents insult my mom which is why they think it’s okay to treat her like a slave but my uncle sets boundaries and they wouldn’t dare to do that to my aunt
Umm didn't you watch it carefully? He did try to call then out but his wife stopped him.
Yeah, bottling up feelings is extremely unhealthy. It only causes them to come out in huge explosions when it's too much.
Throwing even cold coffee in someone’s face is assault it’s not just a slap on the wrist and letting them go she could’ve took that all the way to the bank
I say that Sean was right to call out OP for putting her pride above his feelings over the entire thing with his mom and ex. All of this would've been avoided if she hadn't have been so stubborn.
Narcissist, is all
Why didn't he just talk to her about it? Instead of waiting years
@@jjm3437 fr. "Forced" him to stay quiet. I must've missed the part where she wrote she held a gun to his head and made him endure it all and never told her how it upset him in an adult conversation. Nothing ever stopped him from speaking up before, whether him and OP stayed together or not, he would've had this going on until he had enough, he should've put his foot down forever ago if he really wanted to. She didn't force shit.
@GabrielleHayes1921 have you considered that maybe her husband respects her enough to let her fight her own battles when she asks? He wanted to stand up for her, she told him to stop and likely would have been upset if he did it anyways. So he stopped. I get where youre coming from, but i dont really agree with assuming the worst of people you dont know 😅
@@Fishcat_Eddy I think the point they're making is that he could've talked with her and told her that even though she wanted to take care of it herself, it was still bothering him. In the end, both failed in communicating their feelings.
@6:50
When Sean called Sharon & Diane "Shallow & Trashy" 😏 his own mum and crazy EX-girlfriend of ten years.
Good for you Sean. Show that shiny ✨ new spine for not allowing that disrespect to his WIFE.
The irony in you making a backhanded compliment about not having enough backbone, yet you don't even show face online..
Exactly! He should have completely ignored his wife's request to let her handle this because she's just as dumb, shallow and egotistical as his ex and mom.
@@truebrowncanadian It’s online, who gives a damn?? It’s so weird that showing your face online is so important to you: what does it matter? Why does it bother you so to the point you think someone a coward for not showing their face? I am showing my face and I wholeheartedly agree with their sentiments. What will you say now? 🙄
@@truebrowncanadianThat has to be the most goofiest and dumbest thing you said never speak again
Husband could have spoken up at ANY TIME OVER SEVERAL YEARS to tell his wife he didnt appreciate how she was handling it.
Yea, at least with how she worded it here, it sounds like their original conversation was about him speaking up on her behalf, which she declined. Which is fair enough on both their parts. But if it was also making him uncomfortable, he could have spoken to her about that and ultimately confronted the situation on his own behalf. Kind of sounds like he wanted to use his wife's discomfort to hide his own in any sort of confrontation with his ex and mother, and he got upset that she didn't let him do that.
Exactly. He should have been the man in the relationship and tore his mother a good one at the first sign of disrespect. It took me 8 months with the woman who is now my wife to rip my parents a new hole after my mom made backhand comments about my wife and my dad saying nothing.
He was trying to respect her wishes even though it was affecting him he still, kept quiet for her, and he just had to let it all out eventually.
Right! Then he's says it's her fault too like wtf. They have me pulling my hair out with their lack of communication like damn these two are so stupid.
Imagine how many other unspoken problems are happening. I hate people who suppress their feelings and act line everyone should just know what they are thinking and feeling. Speak up damn it!
so OP's husband decided he would shatter his mom's and his ex-wife's confidence... mad respect for the way he did it too
*Ex- girlfriends
@@hola-xg4bf you're right. same respect still applies tho. to be honest he showed him exactly why disrespecting his marital status is a mistake
@@taminostam9912 you are right
Imagine being such an unhinged and mental bunch that your son/nephew/ex completely cuts you off after numerous warnings and you _still_ lack the insight to figure out not only that you did wrong but also what.
Either dad has low self esteem or is financially dependent on his mom to just never stand up to her for your own son
I’ve noticed a pattern with the mothers in these Reddit posts. 99% of the time they can never except that the people in their lives want nothing to do with them because of their actions. They always blame someone else
This story is definitely fake. It has too many of the usual code words like “taken aback” and errors like saying they received a text but then blocked the call for it to be real. That being said, yeah it’s definitely a pattern of mothers thinking they have total control over their children’s lives, then getting upset when their children finally fight back
That’s how narcissists work; NOTHING is ever their fault, they are PERFECT people, and the world owes them everything simply for existing.🙄
@@matthewcardoza1190 trust me I know, I have the misfortune of calling a narcissist mom
I understand Shawn’s perspective but it’s not like op is a fucking mind reader; if he had such problems with it he should have brought it up? I get how people want their spouses to notice this stuff themselves and op had her vises too but I feel like Shawn should have brought this up if it got to the point he wanted to blow up. Don’t push stuff down and communicate guys!
I feel like ive seen a lot of comments trying to pin blame on shaun for reasons that to me make absolutely no sense. You say OP is not a mind reader but ffs it doesnt take kne to see how utterly stupid OP was in this whole scenario pre update. You act like shaun never brought this up in reality im sure he did countless times, we just arent told this but reasons i believe it to be the case are;
1. Every single time Shaun suggested either not going to a gathering entirely, cutting out his mum and ex snd avoiding the very damn party that was the reason for this post, OP consistently said no and ALWAYD sited her need to prove she doesnt care. She loved the taste of power she got from beating those 2 bozos at their own game, says as much too and once she realised she was "doing the right thing" to get that reaction she litetally couldnt stop.
I have no doubt in my mind that they had to have had so many convos about it but had OP included that kn her post, she would have been reemed to shreds. Heck up until just before the updates she genuinely believed she had handled everything right when in feality she handled EVERYTHING wrong 😂
The fact that even after shaun basically pointed out everything, while accurately portioning blame where appropriate might i add OP still tried to invalidate his feelings, literally proving everything he said right in that moment, she continuously neglected him, ignored his suggestions and blatant asks not to visit his fam because she "knew the kind of people MIL and SIL are (semi-quoted) while conviniently forgetting SHAUN LITERALLY KNOWS THEM 😂.
Im sorry but this to me, wasnt the kind of situation.where hsving to be mind reader was relavant at ALL, OP ignored every metric of Shaun trying to remkve her from the situation, im sure if he did complain, she pushed back and probably (now this is just my speculation based on the above) probably didnt because he wanted to respect her autonomy,.the same way his was NOT respected
Yes! They're both stupid legit. Having me pull my hair out of frustration like damn. At least talk to each other about their feelings. They don't have to have the convo in front of anyone else. Behind closed doors, they could have communicated properly as a couple, and this would've been done with immediately.
To avoid argument amongst all of the BS ? He respects her wife's(an adult woman) point of view . When the family was trying to separate them , it was utmost necessary to stick together. Sean was being matured enough by not making it a topic then. People have different ways of dealing with things . It's easy to hit . dialogues from faraway .The fact that people are still angry over the OP taking accountability for her actions..I wonder what would have happened if he called her out then . It would probably end up with a "Ok your family , deal it by yourself since you are so desperate to cut ties with them. At the end , people will call me a btch for hyping my husband to cut ties with his mothers👺👺👺"
Op is d*mb af so yeah ...not a mind reader for sur... What sort off middle school drama is that
Im sorry but how old you have to be to be aware that ridiculous behaviour like that is annoying?
She engaged in those idiotic childish games... Its mind-blowing
For someone to be so upset that you won't let them stand up for you is such a green flag. W husband.
Yeah this guy is a saint...
7:00 Yeah, there's whole other reddit threads about the quiet person being pushed so far and having bottled up so much that when they finally snap its kinda spectacular.
Also the ex-gf proudly showing off the promise ring from OP's husband years after their break-up was just pathetic.
I agree, she did look over his feelings, but he DIDNT SAY ANYTHUNG EITHER???
To avoid argument amongst all of the BS ? He respects her wife's(an adult woman) point of view . When the family was trying to separate them , it was utmost necessary to stick together. Sean was being matured enough by not making it a topic then. People have different ways of dealing with things . It's easy to hit . dialogues from faraway .The fact that people are still angry over the OP taking accountability for her actions..I wonder what would have happened if he called her out then . It would probably end up with a "Ok your family , deal it by yourself since you are so desperate to cut ties with them. At the end , people will call me a btch for hyping my husband to cut ties with his mothers👺👺👺"
He actually did, but oop kept telling him not to do anything. That she “wanted to put it all behind her”. And honestly, she should’ve let him go nuclear on them, ex is a pathetic pick-me & mom’s a loser reliving her glory days through the ex.
@@jasminedavis3030💯👍🏿
@@Ldfyjhkjg If he respected her point of view he shouldn't have blamed it on her though. He made his choice so he needs to take responsibility. He can't pretend she made him do it if he chose to stay silent about how much it affected him.
Remember folks, if you go out of your way to prove you're not hurt.... You probably are
Exactly... Its such a ABSRDAL way of thinking how old is she?! I didn't see that nonsens after crossing 13year of my teenage years...
This is crazy 😮
💯👍🏿
She didn't want to prove she was not hurt. She wanted to show that she didn't care because when you show people like that that they are affecting you, they just get worse and more creative in insulting you but she never said it didn't bother her though.
@@juliab9596 she literally did say she was bothered, that's also why she kept seeing them. And also, the if "you don't give a reaction, they will stop" is bullcrap, saying it from experience
Typically, it’s the relative whose job it is to deal with drama from that side of the family.
OP shouldn’t have forced him not to engage. But she def shouldn’t deal with any of this at all.
Story 1: The “Almost Anniversary” thing MIL and Ex pulled is just unhinged. It wasn’t a joke and they knew it. But yeah over the 4 years, Diane and Sharon were just pushing and pushing to see that could get away with until they finally pushed too far.
Edit: Splashing coffee on OP??? Yeah these women are psycho and once again, they’re pushing to see what they can get away with again. OP and Sean need Restraining Orders
Honestly, if op wanted to act nonchalant, she should've backhandedly joked to them too.
"Only one of us got a working relationship with Sean, and something tells me it's not you"
Shes not nonchalant - shes d*mb and wants to look cool but she didn't notice shes not in middle school anymore
💯👍🏿
Exactly but she’s too scary for that 😭 she made me mad throughout this whole story bc she never wants to stand up for herself.
Why would the X go? It must be humiliated and desperate of her. Had they publicly told Diane that she looks pathetic and desperate and isn't attractive. Hubby is the only one that is right.
You let your son to be some girl's spare choice? Yikes!
Okay, i get his point, BUT HE ALSO DIDN’T TALK TO HIS OWN MOTHER ABOUT IT FOR YEARS!! Like i know, he had to hold his tongue, but if he was really near the limits of his patience, then he should have said something to his wife about losing control.
I didn't want to victim blame, but he also CHOSE not to talk about the treatment of his wife about the situation and i dont thick he should be left off so easy just because he was asked to hold his tongue.
Exactly, he said nothing and exploded at op for doing the same thing
Then everyone sucks here, him for not speaking about how the situation was making him feel sooner, OP for being too busy trying to look "unbothered" and not trying to think of how the situation was affecting her husband, MIL for not respecting her son and his wife and Ex for the same reason as MIL. But the biggest AH here is MIL 100%, she should want her son to be happy but is instead trying to ruin his marriage, she is the biggest AH in this list of AH. Ooh and I almost forgot, FIL to, for not trying to stop his wife.
He literally said something the first time, but she told him to back off and because he respected his wife, he did. Always partly the man’s fault on these stories. Even when he does what he’s told, “he should’ve done more!”
@@happy-ld8vdshe told him not to engage what do you mean?
Listen, all I'm saying is that ESH! The husband did do as he was asked, which is great! However, he should have at least had a talk with OP about how he was feeling.
There is nothing wrong with listening to your partner. However, if you haven't talked to your partner, how are they supposed to know you're mad at them and the situation.
And clearly, this, wasn't they the only thing the Mil and Ex did. You don't just go from making harsh comments to buying a full gosh damn anniversary cake.
I bet OP would have preferred another MIL too but you can't choose those.
Dianne needs to get a grip. Clinging to a past relationship when the guy has already moved on and gotten married is beyond pathetic. She had her chance with him and she chose to toss him aside and go ho around.
Bro I love my mom endlessly but there’s no fkn way I’d be so weak as to let her disrespect my wife like this. That guy needed to grow a pair and handle that way sooner!
ESH. SEAN is a GROWN MAN who was the only one connected to this. OP just got brought in and defended herself how she saw fit. If he wanted it to end he only had to talk to OP and say for his own sake he wanted it over. Not push it onto OP as why it went on so long.
Sharon and Dianne are perfect for each other.
Am I the only one who thinks it's funny/crazy that the op is judging her father-in-law for the same behavior that she herself did all these years
The Irony
Except now, Sean has made his feelings very clear to everyone, and OP apologized and acknowledged how she's fucked up. FIL hasn't. Big difference.
Umm no those are different?
By not calling out the wrong, you are siding with the wrong . That's the FIL.
Whereas the OP didn't call out the wrong because she took it to be a mental challenge. Tell me how it would be a mental challenge for the FIL . He wasn't the one getting bullied.
Op is not the sharpest tool in the shed thats for sure
No way was the husband actually blaming OP for not entertaining the MIL and ex. They are the only ones who were in the wrong, did he want family drama at every event or something? FIL is also a giant coward
Sharon is one powerful woman to scream for 15 seconds through a text...
Imagine the hearing damage done to the poor souls that were in between OP and MIL during that text.
It was a phone call “she managed to scream at me a whole 15 seconds before I hung up the phone”
@@R5ForeverXx We know. It's just funny because it goes "I received a text. Sharon proceeded to scream at me for 15 minutes before i disconnected the call" like Sharon is calling from text.
How is what Sean did any different from her bottling things up?
Sean have very decent reason - he tried to respect his wife choce...
Op on other hand tried to be cool but didn't noticed shes not in the middle school anymore so no one thinks shes cool at all
@@morganablackwater2017omfg ya’ll know you can respect your partner’s boundaries and STILL voice your issues ??? He isn’t mute, he can talk since he’s a grown adult.
Yeah monster in law never got old XD
If Diane is so great, I hope that she'll help MIL and FIL out down the line. That's all I got to say.
They all need correction!!!! 💢💢💢 Forced and without consent 😭😭😭
Idk how anyone's blaming OP. She was doomed no matter which route she took on the matter, so chose the 'least' damaging one to her character and did nothing. SEAN on the other hand had nothing BUT time and place to have stopped this before it spanned YRS as it did. His apology in private and not public plus putting his mom and ex on the spot also was salt in the wounds. The only doormat here here is FIL for equally allowing this to happen when he too could've stopped it at the head. None of that should've went past a month at best let alone 4 YRS
It feels like you completely ignored all of OP's monumental fuckups to support yout rather strange claim that shaun "did nothing" did you even bother listening to the whole story? Even pre updates there was a LOT Op did wrong.
1. OP was in no way doomed no matter whst route she took, heck none of this whole post would have happened had OP heeded her husband's warnings and actually accept his attempts to disfance them from the situation. Did you forget that before they even went for the holiday dinner the first time, the husband suggested not to and OP decided to go anyway?
Did you forget that once they had been subject to this nonsense for a while Husband suggested pulling back but OP literally says she was the one that advised against it because she "knew the kind of people MIL and SIL were and didnt want to be seen as weaker than them....heck the entire post pre updates reads like she constantly has a point to prove and she confirms this in the update.....
Did you forget the fact that literally prior to the very party that kickstartef the post, husband literally warned against it AND wanted to go to another more important party, OP again with her unending pride said no and that its better yo go to the in lawd.....
Are you also somehow forgetting that during the car ride to the party literally after the whole ordeal she tried to ask an OBVIOUSLY FRESHLY PISSED HUSBAND about the stupid situation that SHE caused.....
Are you forgetting that after getting home from the other party which was the only source of solace for husband, Op AGAIN tried to talk about the situation, i mean read the room ffs 😂
And finally are you forgetting that during the argument sfter Shaun pours his heart out and explains how neglected she feels SHE STILL TRIED TO ARGUE WITH HIM and made it out like he was being harsh for simply expressing how neglected and hurt he felt, like his own autononmy was never respected throughout this whole experience, she STILL tried to invalidate him. I mean come ON....
Its like you completely ignored ALL of those issues so you could find reason to fault Shaun even thoigh OP continuously put her pride and ego above common sense, fighting with people she willingly (and rightfully) mocks and insults while being guilty of being just as dumb. Nah man im sorry but your take is lacking in context and nuance for sure
@@emanx222Not just context and nuance, but also sense.
@@StreetWarrior24 exactly!!!!
Y'll can't tolerate women taking accountability. Sean is a matured men who respects his wife's opinion. His wife told him to back off , he backed off .
“She creeps me out” vs “Stop harassing my wife/girlfriend”
No, just no. He could’ve addressed how their behavior made *him* feel, not how *she* felt. What they were doing to *him* not to *her* as well. He could’ve addressed and dropped a lot, not blame op for being harassed by his family and ex.
He absolutely had a point, but it curves and points straight back to himself in the end.
Telltales working hard!
Maybe im in the minority but OP didn't do anything wrong. If Sean had that much of a problem, open your mouth and say it. Him giving her the cold shoulder was childish as hell.
He did and OP told him not to exact because she knows "women like them." I know you saw that part, right?
@@StreetWarrior24 Then he could have brought it up again.
She’s scary that’s what she did wrong she let them bully her for all those years bc she couldn’t stand up for herself and still couldn’t even after they tried to make her marriage look like a joke and even threw coffee on her she needs to learn how to defend herself and not let people get away with anything.
Am I the only one being happy af after watching this? Like…u know, it‘s actually heartwarming to see how a couple so much in love can overcome any shit thrown their way🥰
I think the coffee incident is being taken a bit lightly by both the police and the OP. She's just damn lucky it wasn't scalding hot
Keep us informed. Glad you are moving. I have heard that if you don’t want people to find you, you should buy your new property under a corporation name. That way PIs or detectives can't discover who owns your property. Look into it for your safety. Those two won't stop, obviously. They are feeding each others psychosis.
Honestly I understand why Sean was mad but at the same time he could've spoken to op about it more thoroughly
I think the husband is also at fault. He wasn’t “forced”. I understand going along with your gf wife or whoever else but he didn’t have to listen to op and go along with her. Why didn’t he chew his parents (mainly his mother) out every time she did what she did? OP it’s not the only one at fault here, thus everyone here sucks
Thank you
So you think he should have disregard her choice and do what he wants? 😂 he finally couldn’t take it anymore and addressed it.
From now on, he should stop listening to his wife because she lacks foresight and is a fool.
@@BabyRho Here's how I see it. He should have spoken to OP about how the situation was making him feel way before blowing up and blaming her. There's nothing wrong with going along with OP's wishes to stay silent, but if it was bothering him that much he should have spoken to her about it again.
@@AintThatJustTheWay I get what your saying but I understand that not everyone expresses their feelings right away
Another 304 losing her back up plan? Must be a day ending in 'Y'
Bro is the best, roasting his mum and Ex -girlfriend and being a great caring husband 😂😂😂
Nah sean be the 🐐😂
......wow op's hubby's family is one of the biggest collective human dumpster fire I've ever seen. Good for them for getting the ferk away.
Bruh, I shouted wtf when the cake and its meaning came out....loudly...in the middle of class 😅
Soo your way of standing up for your self. Is to let them get away with coming after you. hmm..
Sean married his dad since OP is like her FIL
Sean's dad clocked that he has to live with her and he doesn't want that smoke fr😭
Well OP Just dumping everything on others, first she didn't care abt her husband feeling, stop him from interfering and let this silly mind games carry on, now she is blaming FIL.
Wat a narcissistic wife.
You are lucky you have a supportive and loving husband ❤
Story one Sean is weak. He got fed up but then turned around and blamed it all his wife simply because she wanted to seem unbothered which is not wrong. As a man he should’ve handled it from day one. he should’ve taken charge. Tell his wife how he felt instead of accusing her years later of her, not caring about his feelings, blah blah, blah cry, cry, cry, tears, tears, tears weak weak weak.
Looks like Sean got his punkA$$ness from his dad lol
I still don't understand why his bf would not be invited, not only is he his brothers long-term partner but he's been in her life since she was born so he's basically family, there's definitely another reason.
It's the blatant audacity of those two handsome heaux and the wholehearted weakness of his father for me.
Sean is an adult and could have said something years ago.
Ok yes she should have said something but is he a mute? How is it wrong that she tried to keep the peace with his mother? They owe each other an apology. His mother and the ex need to get over it and move on especially the obviously psycho ex. Talk about stuck in the past…. Sorry but FIL is useless. A real husband, not an enabler would have shut down her crap years ago. Again ex is nuts he better get a restraining order on both of them.
The FIL doesn't want to "take sides" (lol lies) because his wife's abuse is finally not towards him.
Lol "I had nothing to do with Seans behavior"
How did the coffee incident not come out to more. It's assault/battery.
The FIL had a similar deny/uninvolved pattern as the OP. It’s not surprising FIL didn’t do anything otherwise he would have years ago. You can tell Sean was used to it and probably why he put up with his wife’s stoic behavior as a result. I thought it was kind of ironic OP didn’t like FIL behavior as it was similar to her own nonchalant attitude towards MIL and Diane.
Gotta love those crazy MIL stories
There's a difference between wanting to act that way and being that way. It eats you inside, but for me who truly cannot care way less than I do, it doesn't affect me in anyway whatsoever
She still isn't considering his feelings even by the end. Smh
the amount of things that are just plain bad and stupid, beyond the adjusted norms
OP did nothing wrong, if her husband had a problem, he should have addressed it himself. OP would have gotten so much retaliation if she had said something.
They were both bad. OP literally kept talking to the mil and ex because she wanted to be chill, ignoring him the first time. They should of communicated.
OP, despite everything that had happened, the bright spot is that you found yourself a keeper. Honestly, the fact that he is willing to forgive you despite your own misstep (which is playing your MIL's petty game), that is a sign that you chose correctly.
As for the MIL and her "best friend" (no idea what to call that other woman), them splashing coffee on OP is indeed malicious intent, and I don't want to shock people, but in certain countries, women do get splashed with concentrated acid from spurned suitors or jealous family members, so I always take this seriously. My guess is that cause they could not manipulate the husband any longer, OP became "the Great Satan" in their eyes for derailing their perfect image of a family. Good on OP and her husband to distance themselves, cause knowing these narcissists, they would not stop until they got that petty "I win" middle finger moment against OP.
The anger of a patient man.
As an ex that’s still close to the family, I’m sorry. I’ve made it very clear to the new GF that I’m in now way interested in my ex and he’s not interested in me. We do have a son, so idk if I’d still be around if not for that, but I am and it is what it is. But I feel like I am closer than just a coparenting relationship with his family. However, I am closer to his new GF than I am with him and have made sure to always keep communication open and give her and reassurance she needs from ME to feel safe. But that’s just how his family is. They are very much loving people and if they love you it’s forever unless you screw them over. This woman is just a witch. You can be close to an ex and ex IL family without being a nuisance.
I feel so bad for Shawn, he literally didn’t deserve any of this
Y'all trying to blame Shaun when even his wife knows she messed up is insane.
Now MIL can marry the ex herself and leaving her passive-than-rock husband to live happily delulu ever after! Wooo!
Yeah, OP was wrong for not considering him, but Shawn could've spoken up as well. Lack of communication was largely at play.
But nothing stopped Shawn from speaking with his mother personally and telling her to cut the sh*t years ago.
Based Sean
haiyaa woman what the f***, always press charges!!!
I will say that Sean shouldn’t have lost it at OP, but was making an entirely valid point. He should have talked to her sooner, and she should have realised.
I would lost it with her way sooner...
The moment she explained her ridiculous way of thinking about that situation.
It would be you either going to a therapy and sort yourself or Im gone.
Thats middle schooler mindset that op has... Shes a red flag
“Beware the anger of a good man”
I am confused to why the wife has to apologize to the husband for his bat shit crazy mother and ex girlfriend. If anything .. he should be trying to make it up to her! He should have been the man and stop this madness from the beginning
Can some one please explain to me why Sharon and Dianne thought throwing coffee at OP would make Sean forgive them?
Dad's a doormat along with the oop.
even in the end, OP still has the need to look chill. pathetic.
It took her 28 years to become nonchalant, and you expect her to change who she is in her core in one week time? Pathetic.
Also, she did already change. Instead of staying passive, she pressed charges and went no contact. That's actively preventing them from hurting OP and her husband.
Im pretty sure he's talking about the "going public " incident , where she just wanted " to move on" and not humiliate those people
I think he's right in a way , cause it still looks like she wants to act like it doesn't bother her.@@Nathan_Bookwurm
@Nathan_Bookwurm she's playing mind games with the two woman to show them she don't care. I don't think that's being nonchalant. She's playing a facade. And I never said anything about her going 180 but at least learned her to have some teeth when being pushed. You're pathetic just like them.
@@Nathan_Bookwurm she's previously playing mind games with them showing she don't care . that's not being non-chalant. she's making a facade, like she wants to them to show she's taking the higher ground.
and i never said anything about her to go full 180 or go berserk or something. her stopping her husband from making a post is pretty much the same as her helding back which forces her husband to hold back as well. she's pathetic and she's dragging her husband down. you're pathetic, too.
The Husband Has A Right To Be Upset With OP, Thats Just Being Dumb. I Get Where His Anger Is Coming From
Sean is such a nice guy
Im not the brightest, but op pulled this “I don’t care” mentality, and op and people in the comments are annoyed that fil did the same thing?
I understand why people go no contact with family. Why would an old girlfriend want to still hang around when he had moved on. His mother is just STUPID.
I pretend nothing bothers me when it does.
This is not toxic this is poison.
Sean is right to call her out. Imagine he's trying to defend you and you want him to keep quiet. Like what do you wanna prove? Youre being so full of yourself too.
honestly he wasn't. that's not being full of yourself its called ignoring your bullies and not letting them get to you. she had every right to say just ignor the comments revolving around her as she is dealing with it.
i dont think she ever told him he cant speak up for himself when they are targeting him or put a stop to that.
@@dobbiereals The problem here is that they aren't targeting him specifically though. Everything they did was indirectly affecting him as they were more focused on insulting and harassing his wife than him because her presence was not wanted.
He couldn't defend himself because the battle is technically between his wife, his ex-gf, and his mother, and if he were to intervene, it would be to back up his wife.
His wife, however, refused to shut it down and decided that she was just going to pretend to be unbothered and suck it up when she doesn't have to.
This puts him in a hard place because the insults and harassing behavior was annoying him and preventing him from getting enjoyment from these family gatherings yet he couldn't say anything because his wife was so adamant that she can just handle it on her own.
So here he is, having to sit here and listen to this dumb garbage because his wife wanted to act unbothered and pretend to be so cool and nonchalant.
This isn't fair to him because who wants to sit there and watch someone they love dearly get mistreated all day?
I think what makes it even more frustrating that it didn't have to be like this. This could have been stopped but his wife let her ego get in the way.
How can he speak up for himself when none of the harassment was directly aimed at him? What is there for him to speak up about? All of it makes no sense so he had every right to get annoyed with his wife.
@@TheRainbowbeautiful Sean could have stood up for himself by speaking to his wife about his feelings rather than bottling them up and blaming her. She can't read his mind. They could have readdressed the situation and created a new action plan that honors both of them. Also, Sean's mom and Dianne's behavior predates his and OP's relationship, so he could have also shut down their behavior earlier.
Ignoring your bullies is a common way to deal with them and OP acknowledged that Dianne and Sean's mom were trying to trigger her, so I don't think OP's approach is completely unfounded. After all, the insults were directed at her, so it would make sense that she would be focused on keeping herself calm. Again, she can't read his mind.
@@AintThatJustTheWay You have a valid point, however, I still don't think it makes sense for her to continue dealing with the situation when it could have easily been stopped.
She even said herself that she has this urge to always remained unbothered and uncaring so, in my opinion, I still feel that she was putting him between a rock and a hard place.
I understand the "ignoring your bullies" mentality well and it is effective, however, it doesn't make any sense for her to continue pushing for these interactions when these all could have been stopped.
Let's be real: for her, it was a battle of egos. It wasn't just a tactic to defend herself against the bullies because she knew all of the options she had and STILL chose to deal with them in this fashion. Even if she can't read his mind, the fact that she continued with this mess for so long just shows that she has a bit of a ego problem that needed to be addressed.
I do agree that I wish he would have spoke to his wife first but I'm sure that's because again, since she was so adamant, he didn't want to disrespect her and step on her toes. Regardless, you're right in that he should have been more communicative in the first place instead of bottling up his feelings and exploding.
I think the point that I agree with the most is about the behavior predating before his wife and how he should have addressed it then. That is very true. He should have been nipped in the bud but he didn't want the conflict.
I think we can successfully conclude that both of them had fault in this situation, whether someone believes it falls more on the wife or the husband.
I think all of this is just another lesson of showing the importance of communication.
Thank you for bringing those points to my attention. I didn't think about this way!
i dont see how her pretending it doesnt bother her would have any bearing on seans actions... I would put my mom in her place soooo fast if she said some dumb shit. My mom knows that though so she doesnt push me (we have a good relationship i promise lmao)
Feels like a big waste of time on Diane’s part
I’m sorry but that’s complete utter horse shit for Sean to blame op for what happened with his mother, what excuse would he use if his mom invited Diane anyway on her birthday?
Where is the comment telling this person to grow a backbone?
Could last 10 seconds before a tumble my poor boy
I don’t think she’s th ah because she was being targeted but he definitely should have brought his feelings up sooner because allowing her to continue battling out despite knowing how he felt