Attachment Trauma: Nervous System Stuck In Freeze Response

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  • Опубликовано: 8 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 96

  • @emotophobiccdd8006
    @emotophobiccdd8006 4 года назад +27

    Just started looking into this and am clearly a freezer. I've always described myself as feeling like I have one foot on the accelerator and the other on the break. Perfect description.

  • @kareng8797
    @kareng8797 Год назад +5

    Your understanding of this is so precise. You have the words that tell what happens inside me. I've been trying to tell people and never said it so someone could understand because there's so much. Don't have a child's body now at 75, but still have child responses: the self-hate, being wrong, guilt, hopeless, hypervigilance, worthless, fear and freeze. Just went into it all following the 21 day journey.

  • @sd-11-11-sd
    @sd-11-11-sd 4 года назад +12

    I have found tapping (eft) to be enormously helpful in re-regulating my nervous system and removing somatic trauma.

  • @danguerriero3094
    @danguerriero3094 5 лет назад +13

    Outstanding Aimie I use to freeze until I had therapy and start taking paxil. After I use to freeze I hated myself and suffered severe guilt and stress. Now I am way better thanks to Professionals like you.

    • @roberttweten
      @roberttweten 5 лет назад +2

      Dan Guerriero what kind of help would know about this stuff?

    • @faisalbi1330
      @faisalbi1330 2 года назад

      Hi we need help please

  • @delphinium5555
    @delphinium5555 4 года назад +4

    Excellent. For those like me suffering Cptsd I've found Tanja Windegger really insightful, it's helped me so much listening to her videos.

  • @betlea8070
    @betlea8070 7 лет назад +19

    24yrs on and I'm finally getting help for PTSD that has had an extreme effect on my life.
    You couldn't have worded it any more perfectly. Thank you x

    • @amandaserena2007
      @amandaserena2007 6 лет назад

      Bet Lea Hey... I'm wondering if there is a way I could chat privately with you pertaining to this video and your experience?

  • @phantompunchmotorizedbikes1624
    @phantompunchmotorizedbikes1624 7 лет назад +14

    Thank you im an adult and have been doing this for 20plus years. Doing my best gather info...

    • @DrAimieApigian
      @DrAimieApigian  7 лет назад +8

      What courage you have! I am so proud of you because I know how hard it was for me to be willing to take a look at this in myself. It has been a great thing for me and I continue to grow and heal, so I expect the same for you.
      Keep up the courage, Buddy. ~Dr. Aimie

  • @Allanwify
    @Allanwify 6 лет назад +23

    I recently came about this SE after 40! years of trauma I finally believe I found something useful ( i am 48 years old) . I read the book by Peter Levine, that was my light bulb moment. Now the therapy starts, ordinary cognitive therapy just dont work.

    • @KK-gi3wt
      @KK-gi3wt 5 лет назад +3

      Thank you for sharing. I am 48 also and have been trying to find other resources to help me. You are right ordinary cognitive therapy just doesn't work.

    • @tizzlekizzle
      @tizzlekizzle 5 лет назад +1

      @@KK-gi3wt Have you read From Surviving to Thriving: CPTSD; Pete Walker? That helped me a lot.

    • @rafadydkiemmacha7543
      @rafadydkiemmacha7543 4 года назад +3

      How's your progress, guys? I'm most likely stuck in freeze response for more than 20 years. I get new somatic symptoms, like swelling and sweating. Everybody tells me to exercise and I'm not able to. I can walk for hours, but any sort of exercise other than that makes me go mad, panic and exhausted. My muscles are very stiff. I also look like a zombie most of the time, with very dry skin and dull eyes. It goes away only from time to time and I still haven't figured out when. That's a nightmare, because nobody can help me. I'm suggested to go for a cognitive therapy, which I did multiple times for years and it did NOTHING.

    • @valuetainer3437
      @valuetainer3437 3 года назад +1

      TRE is better

  • @littlelulu4107
    @littlelulu4107 5 лет назад +38

    Maybe that's why many are diagnosed as having bipolar disorder but actually have ptsd?

    • @dinetk3125
      @dinetk3125 5 лет назад +5

      Little Lulu
      Absolutely

    • @Oilofmercy
      @Oilofmercy 3 года назад

      That is an obvious mistake they manifest differently. How terrible.

    • @liberationwasalie2982
      @liberationwasalie2982 3 года назад

      people's minds are so fragile nowadays it's much easier to develop something like ptsd or trauama now, in my opinion

  • @fredworthmn
    @fredworthmn 5 лет назад +16

    I prefer a definition of the FREEZE response which separates the FREEZE from the final response, or SUBMISSION. My FREEZE makes me hyper aware when I perceive danger in the area. All my senses are on hyper alert so that I can get out of the area or do whatever I can to avoid "getting eaten". Staying in this mode does a real number on my body and has over the last 60+ years.
    SUBMISSION is another thing all together. We are going to be "eaten" so the body floods itself with (I hear) dopamine which causes us to dissociate, to feel numb, to slur our words, to not be able to think properly. The reason I prefer to separate the two conditions is because the SUBMISSION response is entered from ANY of the initial responses. It is over. I will be "eaten", severely beaten, chastised, whatever the MONSTER chooses to do to me.
    If a child comes to you as a therapist with this definition of FREEZE, you are justified in teaching relaxation techniques, CBT techniques to get moving again, mostly external actions which the therapy field is so fond of.
    If the child has signs of SUBMISSION then something is going on of which you are not being told or something horrendous has happened to the child.
    Personally, I have seen no techniques which resolve the SUBMISSION state in adults who achieved this state as children, mainly because we have been in the state for too many decades. Also, few understand how serious the issue is and kind of belittle us in my opinion.
    I would hope that if you can get to a child early, then maybe you can reverse what I have experienced, and what I have read from a lot of reviewers of this video.

    • @Peacemakerblue
      @Peacemakerblue 5 лет назад

      fredworthmn what do you mean you have stayed in a freeze response for 60+years?

    • @Peacemakerblue
      @Peacemakerblue 5 лет назад

      A real number on your body?

    • @KK-gi3wt
      @KK-gi3wt 5 лет назад +1

      I fully understand the comment freeze position for so many years. I as well was in that place until this last year. I did need to use a medication to help tell me switch to turn off and to allow my nervous system to start to heal. I am finding however due to dealing with a high conflict divorce with a husband with antisocial personality disorder the constant need to keep safe, with the lies, gaslighting, bullying once again has triggered the switch to go on so easily. Thank you for sharing your story. It has helped me feel grounded and not alone.

    • @cshula1
      @cshula1 5 лет назад +3

      Hi Fred. This sounds like me. I'm 65 now and have had this problem most of my life. I have panic attacks just reading this but I also appreciate your taking the time to tell your story.

    • @brendasuepete1518
      @brendasuepete1518 5 лет назад +2

      fredworthmn I have never heard of the submission stage but realize I’ve lived there many moments of my life by your description. The book The Body keeps the score is a brilliant one to show how the traumas in life are stored in the body’s responses. It also gives some clarity as to how to treat yourself. Well worth the read, I’m half way through. It brings understanding and so hope to these big issues.

  • @KK-gi3wt
    @KK-gi3wt 5 лет назад +3

    Thank you for this video. I am looking for help for my self. You have been the only one who understand and explains my feelings and I have been seeking help and not able to find it so I am taking it upon myself to find all I can online to work through this issues I have. I am so grateful for this video. And yes it is so exhausting.

  • @MsSingingcindy
    @MsSingingcindy 5 лет назад +24

    Any tips for an adult who suffers from this from a mother with NPD and emotional neglect?

    • @qivuit1
      @qivuit1 3 года назад +3

      Find a therapist who does Somatic Experiencing

    • @juliavanrun-kilic1744
      @juliavanrun-kilic1744 3 года назад

      Check out « running on empty » and “running on empty no more” by Jonice Webb

  • @proudscorpio46
    @proudscorpio46 6 лет назад +20

    Depersonalization

  • @vanessarenae5169
    @vanessarenae5169 5 лет назад +4

    I am Stuck here. My body is tightening up all the time. My digestive system is open, and my food just comes right out without being digested.
    I'm doing some EFT tapping and it helps me.

  • @persephone6896
    @persephone6896 4 года назад +1

    Thank you for getting straight to the point . I hate long intros 😉. Very helpful too.

  • @jenniferh.7219
    @jenniferh.7219 2 года назад

    Wow this title is spot on

  • @denisf.1744
    @denisf.1744 3 года назад

    Hi Dr.Aimie,I had this same type of experience that your talking about,thank you,love Denny😘🧡🙏

  • @innovativeentertainment4412
    @innovativeentertainment4412 6 лет назад +10

    Is it possible that if I am aware of my freeze response reactions, to self care and self soothe, in the in between time of my therapist appointments?

  • @rafadydkiemmacha7543
    @rafadydkiemmacha7543 4 года назад +5

    Is there some sort of community for the freeze response? I live in that state for more than 20 years now and it's still treated as some magical "something". I'd like to know the stories of people who successfully came back to normal. Are there even people like that? I'm tired of being tired all the time and having these random physical symptoms.

    • @TheBakingGirlShow
      @TheBakingGirlShow 2 года назад

      Check out Irene Lyon channel - she has a bunch of success stories

  • @dianaboughner7977
    @dianaboughner7977 5 лет назад +1

    🤗Thank you 💞 For survivors, all this shared knowledge and explanation help us to help ourselves.

  • @antanasvainius3028
    @antanasvainius3028 5 лет назад

    Rather simplistic response. It often is way more complex that any explains in my experience. Tho can appreciate explanation.

  • @kathymyers7279
    @kathymyers7279 6 лет назад +17

    So frustrating. I need this help so much and I get so confused and cant concentrate enough to understand.

    • @DrAimieApigian
      @DrAimieApigian  6 лет назад +9

      Hi Kathy, it sounds like you may have a lot going on that can all be related to the freeze. Fatigue and energy problems will also contribute to brain fog and not being able to concentrate. Often times we have hormone imbalances, food sensitivities, gut inflammation or auto-immune stuff that make it difficult to do the trauma work. I encourage you to start with what you can with what you know already, and as you start moving towards better health, pieces will start to come together. If you would like individual help, we are starting a women's group class shortly. You can email me at health@draimie.com for more information on joining that class as that will go over each of these areas and where to even start. Warmly, Dr. Aimie

    • @fifiearthwanderer
      @fifiearthwanderer 3 года назад

      @@DrAimieApigian is the women's group still available? I am just recently discovering about the freeze response. I never knew what I had. People , even therapist never understood what I meant when I would say my whole body tenses up and gets so stiff I can't get out of bed. Now I am learning about it but the work seems hard as it has been deeply entrenched in my brain to respond that way.

    • @DrAimieApigian
      @DrAimieApigian  3 года назад +1

      @@fifiearthwanderer I have a class on the freeze response and its connection with attachment, autoimmune and fatigue this Tuesday May 18. Make sure to get on my email list to get the details and link. traumahealingaccelerated.com (you can download the Roadmap for Attachment Trauma to get on the email list.

    • @fifiearthwanderer
      @fifiearthwanderer 3 года назад

      @@DrAimieApigian wow thank you so much!! I am looking forward to it. I will definitely check it out. 🙏🏼🌟💯🥰

  • @louiseleplat8717
    @louiseleplat8717 3 года назад +1

    After 4 years of trying to get out of a freeze response I finally realised that I had to release this built op tension.. what an eye opener ! Thank you so much!!

  • @pixie1310
    @pixie1310 7 лет назад +4

    This makes sense! I started therapy for the first time in my life (I have BPD). Been seeing her for 5 months and Ive had the freeze response a few times and could not figure it out. Makes sense, thank you!

    • @DrAimieApigian
      @DrAimieApigian  7 лет назад +1

      Good for you! Allowing myself to go into the full freeze response the first few times were really scary for me, so I commend you for your bravery!

  • @ledacedar6253
    @ledacedar6253 Год назад

    You didn’t include the trauma response of Fawning aka Accommodation! Faced with my fathers reactive rage state I had no chance to run or fight, I fell to the floor thinking my vulnerability will hit him but it didn’t, so he wasn’t present & I saw this in his eyes- all black…in that disassociated state he repeatedly kicked my hip & thigh. God only knows where he was but at 16 I was introduced brutally into WTF happened & a lifetime of seeking answers!
    I’m soaking in your wisdoms, supplements & tools. Hearing you explain with Gabor that you figured out- for every stress event there’s an autoimmune flare up! Yes, yes doc is noticed this round & round frustratingly, in active healing mode, naturopaths, visceral manipulation, massages and thought awareness with yoga & meditation so I was feeling it was hopeless with depressed feelings. But there you were & are! Now I hope to apply your small steps. I’d tried a more vigorous yoga and got reactive; took care to take space but when class was over I
    somehow went back into full lizard where my intended joke turned into an aggressive threat! OMG.
    Plus thinking of confronting my fears needed some Inner Lobster focused energy was oh so wrong! The somatic body is quite an alive creature but I love it best in meditation & yin yoga calmed & grounded in Love & Joy! Thank you Doc.

  • @colleen6050
    @colleen6050 3 года назад +1

    Wow, you are terrific in explaining this.

  • @soundvillage001
    @soundvillage001 3 года назад +2

    Dr Aimie, I’ve been locked in freeze for 6 months and have lost hope of recovering. Is there a path out of chronic freeze? I have no home and don’t feel able to navigate getting one in this state.

  • @Geotubest
    @Geotubest 6 лет назад +4

    Great video which I'm trying to apply to myself. Sought therapy last year after a job loss and my reaction to that. But perhaps my issues go deeper, I don't know. I try to look at my reactions to intensely stressful situations as an adult and compare that to how I felt to such situations (usually during family arguments) as a child and indeed I find myself going into freeze responses....and staying there. I feel like I've been in one for over 2 years now. I feel like I have PTSD...and detached...a sense of "giving up" like a cow facing an inevitable demise in a slaughterhouse. I can relate to your description of a child who is confronted whether they should fight or flight and deciding to freeze as it's the "best" course of action at the time for self-preservation. Still not sure how I can get out of this.

  • @Mma-Guy
    @Mma-Guy 5 лет назад +1

    This video was great but what can we do to heal this?

  • @reinamatheny9972
    @reinamatheny9972 4 года назад

    I am over 50 years old and do this ~ I can't imagine having a child feeling like this ~ it breaks my heart to think they go through such trauma that their system reacts to any threatening encounter this way :(

  • @lilianka3943
    @lilianka3943 4 года назад +3

    I've been in derealization caused by a breakup, for 2 years now. I tried so many things. I'm helpless and don't know how to get out of it, since I already did so much therapy, acupuncture, mental health work etc ...

    • @LilyStultz
      @LilyStultz 2 года назад

      How are you doing now?

    • @lilianka3943
      @lilianka3943 2 года назад

      @@LilyStultz Still in it, but it has gotten easier. And I never grew as much as I did since it started!

    • @LilyStultz
      @LilyStultz 2 года назад

      @@lilianka3943 what have you tried to help it if you don’t mind me asking?

  • @siuabc
    @siuabc 5 лет назад +2

    This is me exactly, in my midlife, shame of my past, triggered by shoulder injury/surgery, I am in 24/7 flight, fight, and freeze response for past 6 months. How to break from this state? It is debilitating.

    • @DrAimieApigian
      @DrAimieApigian  5 лет назад

      This can be debilitating! It is possible to come out of the state rather quickly with the right work and support. It might be helpful to visit my website to look at other blogs and videos and the Take Charge of My Trauma eight week course.

    • @1STBUCKLEY
      @1STBUCKLEY 3 года назад

      Dr Sarno mind body

  • @philipmulvihill1455
    @philipmulvihill1455 3 года назад

    Amy do you know a therapist in Venice or Nokomis Florida that does somatic experience? I am newly familiar with this watching Peter levine the founder of this thank you

  • @margaretpetersen9275
    @margaretpetersen9275 Год назад +1

    Ohmylord!! Thats me😮. I was like that as a kid

    • @DrAimieApigian
      @DrAimieApigian  Год назад +1

      We need to do the work to not get stuck in it

  • @khansherani
    @khansherani Год назад +1

    In my case it looks to me that the initial near drowning trauma made me more vulnerable to later attachment trauma of emotional abanadonment. How to heal from this emotional wound now when most of the time my body seems stuck in freeze response

    • @DrAimieApigian
      @DrAimieApigian  Год назад

      Download the free tool, link in the description box

  •  5 лет назад

    2:00-2:08: it is and everyone that's taken advantage had smiled in my face knowing they are manipulating and harassing me! The great 9 families of Europe.

  • @dariness7176
    @dariness7176 5 лет назад +1

    Hey I am in this mindset. I always had awareness when something is wrong and I always wanted to fight it or tell someone but in order to survive I was told shut up pretend it's not happening and it has gone against me over the years when my previous girlfriend was attacked I wanted to do something but I froze trying to figure out should I do something because my mom was repeatedly attacked by her bad bf and was told it's normal not to call the cops or fight the bf.
    Was it my fault or was I a coward.

    • @yuk498
      @yuk498 4 года назад +1

      Neither Darin. It was not your fault and you are clearly not a coward. It was a freeze response. A very normal response to what you have suffered through.

  • @dariness7176
    @dariness7176 4 года назад +1

    is there a trauma were if the triggers are repeated by not just the abuser but by others who use similar actions that the abuser used.
    What I am going through it's like a chain , I leave the abuser or situation but I end up getting victimized again then I freeze.
    I feel like i am getting gang stalked and i am paranoid
    What do I do, i feel like i am attacked

  • @Aamina101
    @Aamina101 5 лет назад +1

    how would you know if your system is stuck in fight or flight? i suspect it but what are some really obvious symptoms? i have high
    heart rate upon standing and random high blood pressure and random panic feelings and pretty much a feeling of constant anxiety but that’s from being scared of all thes symptoms too

    • @foolishjuan3883
      @foolishjuan3883 5 лет назад

      Have you found any answers to what your experiencing? Its been 4 months for me of constant anxious feelings throughout my whole body day in and day out... It got to a point I was getting anxious stomach feeling w/ a massive amount of gas and irregular bowel movements. The stomach issue has gone down but the nervousness everyday has me exhausted. I even feel fatigued some days are better then others and I too haven't gotten answers. I have seen 2 doctors and blood work and stool samples come back normal...

    • @sheelawal7616
      @sheelawal7616 5 лет назад

      Hello have you found answers to this

  • @juliearcand2358
    @juliearcand2358 2 года назад

    I have severe PTSD and have horrible freeze issues...like staring for an hour without the ability of even moving my eyes. I also have a rare spinal condition that is called Klippel fiel syndrome, cervical malformation os odontoid and surgeries to fix it. I become dissociative and will make odd movements with my hands ( after the freeze relaxes), or putting my sweatshirt over my mouth6 or actually rocking back and forth...that it is very embarrassing. Can my spinal condition be a factor in addition to my long term sexual abuse and neglect?

  • @daviniatuhura3933
    @daviniatuhura3933 2 года назад

    The body remembers the pain.

  • @margiegould9675
    @margiegould9675 3 года назад

    Do you loss sleep when in this state

  • @traceydominguez8914
    @traceydominguez8914 4 года назад

    How do we change it. Or get out of it. I’ve been in it for the last 4 months

    • @DrAimieApigian
      @DrAimieApigian  4 года назад

      Hi Tracey. There is a lot you can do. The first place I would direct you is www.traumahealingacclerated.com where you will see an introductory experiential course with practical body-based exercises to gently start this work. Talking about it won't help as much, and actually doing some introductory level body based exercises is a great place to start. www.traumahealingaccelerated.com.

  • @crowkangi
    @crowkangi 2 года назад

    great info. not sure about the eyebrows tho.

  • @nurseray6866
    @nurseray6866 2 года назад

    I was brutally raped last summer and my therapist just pointed this out to me. I’m like “wow!” That’s what it was .. ppl would ask why didn’t you do this, why didn’t you do that. Between the few seconds in moments where you felt ok to you realizing something isn’t right, that’s the amount of time your brain has to make a decision and it totally froze! On one hand I knew I couldn’t fight him, he just proved his strength.. yeah I could bite him and further piss him off.. & seal my fate. So I froze….was tortured but … I’m alive.

  • @jaymezalexander3397
    @jaymezalexander3397 4 года назад +1

    i know what the f/f is like. i always what to fight & dissoiate

  • @roberttweten
    @roberttweten 5 лет назад

    Hey Doc...I’ve been stuck in freeze for over ten years. Would appreciate any help or suggestions. Thanks

    • @DrAimieApigian
      @DrAimieApigian  5 лет назад +1

      Hello Robert, not knowing any of your situation, it is really hard to say. Getting stuck in healing can either be because we are not doing the right therapies or we have biological imbalances that play a role. Not knowing which category you fall into makes it very hard to offer any suggestions. I have written a Roadmap to Accelerated Healing Trauma if this would be helpful. It is free and you can access it at www.traumahealingaccelerated.com
      Dr. Aimie

  • @kerryhitzke4490
    @kerryhitzke4490 5 лет назад

    Where are the diagrams?

  • @dotdot4895
    @dotdot4895 4 года назад

    This is funny as when I’m actually driving a car I have to consciously not drive while also using the brake 😂 hyper vigilance for real

  • @karenduey9675
    @karenduey9675 4 года назад

    Thank you for sharing.... you look sleepy

  • @tywatts7834
    @tywatts7834 4 года назад

    Not my children it's me

  • @1916shine
    @1916shine 5 лет назад

    By doing my own research I realized I was stuck in the freeze response. I went through a horrible break up, I didn't want to be a single parent. I was going to school and working long hours. My body just shut down, my digestive system started to act up and sexual responses was completely going. I am dry and I'm in my early 30s, its been this way for 3 years now. I'm just started to do the work to heal myself, but I'm afraid that I've been stuck for too long, that the damage is unrepairable. Remind my obgyn ran tests for hormone imbalance and everything was fine. Hopefully I can be back to my old wet self.

    • @sheelawal7616
      @sheelawal7616 5 лет назад

      How are u dealing with it

    • @Smokillo
      @Smokillo 5 лет назад

      hi, i'm sorry to hear you go thru this, I also think I'm stuck in the freeze response and affects sex function...but I don't stay dry I have trouble with arousal.

  • @ledacedar6253
    @ledacedar6253 Год назад

    And not being heard is one of my biggest triggers cause I’m like in their face, fists up at 5’2” 103# 70 yr old! I’m digging down to figure the source & find resolution next creative emotional therapy!

  • @queerjamie2608
    @queerjamie2608 2 года назад +1

    Dont suppose you could do one about that child growing up into an adult nobody seems to talk about it but i was like that as a child and im 26 years old i still freeze not talking or moving when i feel overwhelmed by life i hate that i do that though