How to come out of a chronic freeze response (Re-run of my most viewed
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 20 май 2024
- NOTE: This video is a re-run from November 1, 2017. It was a popular one, over 220K views to date, so like all popular shows on good old fashion TV (television), we are doing a re-run of this so all those new here don't miss it.
To access the original video which has many questions in the comments from viewers, plus answers from my team, head over:
• How to come out of a c...
__
This is one of the BIGGEST questions I get. How does a person come out of a chronic shutdown and functional freeze stress physiology after they've been shutdown and not able to FEEL or process past emotions, memories and sensations effectively, or for many, not at all. This is a common situation when one has survived a lot of adversity, chronic stress, abuse, and to be quite honest, just living in the Western world surviving and PUSHING through to make ends meet and keep up with the standards.
Resources I Mention during this Vlog: (as well as a few supplemental ones)
► The Healing Trauma 3-Part Video Training
irenelyon.com/healing-trauma-...
► For us to heal, we must be willing to not fear, fear.
irenelyon.com/2017/08/23/us-h...
► How stored up traumatic (toxic) stress creates chronic illness
• How stored up traumati...
► An Epidemic of Chronic Illness: How Stress, Trauma & Adversity Early in Life Impacts Our Capacity to Heal
irenelyon.com/2017/02/03/epid...
► Information on THE ACE STUDY, or Adverse Childhood Experiences Study
www.cdc.gov/violencepreventio...
► The mentor I mentioned, Kathy Kain, founder of Somatic Practice www.somaticpractice.net/
__
Thank you for being here!
1. Leave a comment and let me know how this video impacted you. Feel free to leave a question (my team answers them each week!)
2. To get more nervous system health resources, plus learn more about me and my credentials, plus the many ways you can work with me at the practical level, head to my website: irenelyon.com
3. Follow me on social here:
Instagram: / irenelyon
Facebook: / lyonirene
LinkedIn: / irenelyon
SoundCloud: / irenelyon
4. GOT QUESTIONS? Send an email to: support@irenelyon.com
__
Please know that…
The statements on this RUclips channel or in videos are simply opinion. Content presented or posted on this channel is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment or a professional therapeutic relationship. Content presented or posted is intended to provide general health information for educational purposes only and you should contact the appropriate healthcare professional before relying on any such information.
My website is a wealth of free resources and information on how to start this work, so here it is one more time: irenelyon.com
I dissociated for my first 12 years of life, and then I was sent to boarding school. It's taken 60 years for me to feel safe. My mother is a covert narcissist, and my dad was an alcoholic. I was born with asthma. My life has been pretty messed up. All the best for everyone going through this
I just discovered Boarding school syndrome in these last weeks, I too went to boarding school, and had never heard of this before. It made a lot more of my life make sense. I wish you all the best in this journey. Check out Nick Duffel and Joy Schavarien.❤
Hope you keep healing & that things are loooking up for you Jeff!
You described my life. Same things same parents.
You seem to have a good grasp of what happened. Good to be able to keep healing in a safer space.
@@Meryt232 Me too. Same life, same parents.
I took singing lessons for a year, as a side-therapy. I was 'allowed' to unshackle my feelings, raise my voice, experience and express emotion and achieve a form of artistic skill. 😊
Sound is so remarkably healing! I’ve just started consciously connecting to this energy that’s been unconsciously acting to a degree within me as well, the deep connection to sound, music, vibration…..the base of everything, of us IMO . Even humming can be so therapeutic! I heard these Brothers Koren talking about our whole body instrument and the importance of letting all the sounds out of our body In Song and otherwise to heal ourselves and the world around us….each unique sound is important….so I’ve been working with my voice in safe places and the shifts happening over the last year have been….profound..I’ve also been receiving g sound, through sound baths (in person, online, as a song, etc) , or mantra chanting or singing in yoga or Kirtan, and the power of sound in community is….powerful.
I love that you found your voice and were able to open to the flow of your artistic skills! Keep taking up space and sharing your gift with yourself (and the world around you if that feels good, and probably by proxy!)
I don’t know if this will resonate with you, but something that spoke to me deeply about sound was this idea that when we experience trauma, and these emotions become stuck around & in our body, when the mind is so rigid that it doesn’t want to release, sound penetrates beyond the mind and all the NOISE, the stories of “can’t” “shouldn’t” or terror and fear, the dissonance, so we can directly sing to the cells (and science is beginning to support this idea as well!) and reawaken, releasing slowly but surely some of that stored pain, sadness, etc…..I find it to be such a beautiful adjunct to my therapy and work, and I love seeing another fellow human finding the same love for their song ✨ best to you!
Nice
Wish I was able to sing in front of anyone. I just can't or else I start crying.
Whenever I sing in my car I start crying instantly and get overwhelmed with so much emotion and its so freeing in a way I feel like I'm releasing so many emotions and yes yes yes euphoric
Don't be afraid of the sobs that want to burst out of you when you sing. Exactly people like this need to be singers. They feel the vibe. Free yourself. Find a voice-coach and deliberately learn that one song that makes you feel uncontrollable. You will love the world and all that is in it, including you. 🥰
Turning 28 soon. I've come to realise that disassociation has always been my only coping mechanism.
Same here. 29 years old
Praying that this will be a healing time for you.
how do you dissociate though
Possums are soo cute
Same 25
Once I've realized that I've been in a freeze state most of my life, it became important to grieve the lives that I could have had if I had been able to use my potential earlier in life. Sending all the love and light to everyone in this situation. We're amazing 🤍💫
The struggle is real...I hope you are living the life you want
Thank you for validating my crippling childhood trauma. Affluent home, "the good kid" that was me. Now I'm a dissociated mess. Trying to put back the pieces.
Affluent home with the emotionally unavailable parents. Lack of emotional attunement and validation + criticism = feeling unsafe = fight/flight/freeze/fawn trauma response 💔
“Many people are living semi functional lives in some forms of shutdown response… They’re still awake, still concious. Parents, kind of” THE SHADE 💀
Hope you are well.
It’s so true tho
It is true even tho it can hurt
Auto pilot or robotic
As a surgeon, I can tell you some of my patients have had trauma without them ever uttering a word about it. You learn to recognize the signs.
Hello, Sophia from Team Lyon here. Thank you for your share and insight, it is really appreciated.
How?
How?
S/He said s/he ‘can’ tell you, not that s/he would tell you.
@@fatuusdottore Usually, for some type of trauma 's people only talk about it when they are out of the environnement only. Before that they can even live in denial or just 90% unconscious of how big is the problem. It's the case of children thinking that their parents are just strict, and not abusive even though these kids keep walking on eggs every second in their home. They just forget or hide themselves, or their personality in order to survive. But reconising the real situation you are in , doesn't help survive if you are completely powerless like a child for example
I just turned 49. I don't have a license. No one taught me how to drive.
I been in freeze for decades.
You can take a driving class if you want to. It's less stressful learning from someone who actually teaches driving class. Many of them even have an extra brake and steering wheel on their side in case they need to make an adjustment for safety reasons.
I am almost 40 and in the same boat. Hope we figure it out or at least reach peace with it
Here's a recap for those watching the vid again.
1. Education (awareness)
2. Environmental safety (move out of traumatic places)
3. Internal safety (touch the parts of body that feel safe)
4. Tough stuff (touch the parts of body that were frozen)
Thank you so much for the educational information. Wish us, we all with best healing journey. We can get through this ❤😊
Thanks so much for the likes 🌱
Thank you for this recap!! ❤
good job 🎉
😊🎉❤
Thank you for the list ❤
👍👍👍
I love that you said "don't look that up right now," lol.
(That's how easily I can get distracted and off on a tangent.)
😂 Me too!!
I came into the world in freeze and fawn (when I could start speaking) and it looked like I was shy and reserved, but once I started talking (usually to an adult that wasn't my parents) I was overly gracious, complimentary or interested, and was usually seen as a "good egg." This was me freezing until it I needed to come up for air out of my own mind in which I hid for "protection" in a emotionally and mentally unsafe environment. Needless to say, I liked going to school to get away from home, but at home I was made to engage regularly and share what I learned at school, but basically never asked what I wanted to do or what my actual interests were, so I molded mine mostly around both my parents as a way to connect that was more emotionally driven than intellectual like everything else. I was still heavily immersed in my family unit once I left home and started living with my grandparents during college and my siblings after college until I finally got the opportunity to buy a condo at 32 years old, and I became aware that I had been in a trigger response all of my life until that point. I do a lot of breath work and yoga every day and try to do a lot of low swim learning (reading books, doing puzzles, and writing whenever and whatever I feel like expressing since I couldn't express as a child and throughout my life until recently). I do not share my writing with anyone (other than my therapist if it is relevant to understanding my life) and do not feel comfortable "giving away my true energy" because I need it for myself to self actualize still. It's a mind melt to think that I was in this experience for such a long time because I was afraid to admit that my parents didn't nourish or love me because they themselves were also triggered and dissociated mentally and emotionally. I accept them as they are, but I do not feel any attachment towards them other than in biological references.
Relatable!
Wow I relate! I also came out of dissociation from trauma later in life and realized my “niceness” was not genuine and I actually hated many family members for abusing and/or traumatizing me. I realized I don’t feel attachment to almost anyone. My mom died and I felt more relief than sadness, and of the sadness, most was about sadness for my younger self not receiving healthy treatment from her rather than missing her.
I relate so much.
So with you! You helped me better understand ME. Thank you.
Yes - Yin Yoga and breathwork are my medicine as well. 😊🙏🏽🙌🏽
I needed this explanation to understand my messy life. I've been frozen my whole life hating myself for not being able to speak and defend myself in unfair situations.
So being rendered mute is freeze? I was SO quiet and timid as a child. Felt I wasnt worth being heard
As a massage therapist is like to add that there's a lot of sadness stored in the tops of the thighs or quad area. Foam rollers do wonders for this stuff
How to use them? I got the melt methode book and some of the rollers but... haven't started yet 😅 ofcourse
Im thinking wow if I could get through medical school that would be amazing
I can barely go grocery shopping It's horrible The terror grows because if I don't move and go to work that day I'll be on the street homeless so I throw up all morning on the worst mornings before work along with many other wonderful extremely uncomfortable physical reactions I'm beyond drained by late afternoon I skip stopping to get a proper dinner in the way home i get hime grab cereal an crash under my blanket in bed listening to something soothing
I constantly try these techniques I really do
In some ways it's not an over reaction because I'm alone and can't find any help after several horrific experiences iña row If I didn't have my cell phone with caring sounding videos I don't know what id do laying in bed
I can't afford a good therapist or join in any therapeutic activities with others such as yoga for trauma or any others right at the moment
Wow, that is mind blowing. I can't seem to understand why I always have such sore upper thighs when I roll.
@@monarch2056 I am sure you will get over this, sometimes there is a little light we just have to turn a little bit to see it. I know you are really afraid but I will send you love energy, even if I don’t know you I feel your pain. A lot of love and strength for you 🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥🔥
It takes time honey, I was stuck for a pretty long time until I realized that this is actually hard hard work. You have to put in the work instead of just waiting for it to happen. It starts from inside out, changing your thoughts and challenging your beliefs. It's a gentle strength that starts to flow out of you once you accept this challenge to change and heal. It feels to me like you would benefit from working with a person a therapist a coach.. you might have to go through a couple until you find a person that fits. They will challenge you and you will dislike them for that but you gotta keep going no matter what. Believe me how rewarding it will be in the future....
I have watched this video multiple times. No doubt I’ll watch it a few more times in the future. I’m that kid: the quiet one, the reader.
me too
Yes! Me too
Me too. Glad I stumbled upon this video. I'll re watching it also. Good Luck to you all and love and healing your way.
Ooh look at me I’m the smart quiet kid I read books !!! Ooh la la talk about “pick me” energy lol wow you’re so smart and secretly brilliant !!
“… driving without never having been taught how to drive “ is exactly how I feel in this moment. I wake up dreading the days.
I am supposed to get myself a job, “be an adult” be responsible for myself ,
Take care of a home, and children , and take car to mechanic , all under emotional trauma , not only childhood trauma , but trauma of a 20 plus years dealing with a narcissist people.
I feel lost, stuck , overwhelmed , with too many options and not being able to choose any. This can usually be confused with depression , but for me I know it’s situational. I am certain I am lacking key developmental skills I never got . I have many talents ,
I am capable. I know this bc I have done it in the past, but interestingly when I look back , I was in a state of “ fight” response.
I am searching and searching. I will not give up until I get myself out of this painful / frozen / without a life force stage.
Safety is right !!!!!!!! I can’t be ME. I must hide ( I feel the safest in my room.) I must constrict myself not to offend others , etc .
i pray things will get better for you i can relate an what saved me was da Lord Himself He taught me to operate outta love instead of da behaviors an feelings of those around me its a lonely road but its worth it when you have the MostHigh as a guide
Sounds like me. I was diagnosed with chronic CPSTD, depression, and anxiety after having a brain scan done. Caused by years of narcissistic abuse. EMDR was suggested.
I feel the same. I practically could have written this. And now that I’m 49, I’m feeling the additional pressure to finally heal so that I can finally live my life. I hope we both get there. ❤
Are you me???
I could have written this!
Sounds like my issues. I was an undiagnosed aspie, and I could never regulate my actions. My dad and ex stepmother tried everything to get me to behave. Dad would take a 2x4 across my butt, throw me around, and scream at me. Ex stepmother would take hangers a hit me, slap me around, and threaten me. I was grounded from the age of 8 until the divorced at 12. My ex stepmother talked my dad into getting rid of all of my stuff except for bed, desk, and clothes. The hours I spent locked in my room with nothing to do and no one to talk to screwed me up. Growing up I was afraid of my father, and would feel ice in my chest whenever I heard the garage door open. I am still dealing with night terrors today at the age of 40 where I wake up kicking and reaching for my pistol. They want to be in my life now, and it’s so hard. I’m still working on not freezing to this day, and I can say I am a lot better and less meek than I was at 18. It’s never going to go away, and I’ll always carry psychological scars, but I will not let it define my life. Best of luck to everyone that went through pain at the hands of those that were supposed to love us.
what is a piece of advice you could give to someone to improve please?
You have my compassion, mine was rough in a different way but I have been frozen all my life. I am 68 grateful you are 40. I took a deep breath when you typed they want a relationship with you. My Mom who was the main abuser developed dementia about 4 years back, I was in the not having a relationship zone and it was honestly better not interacting with her. However she is now in Hospice and is 90 I spent a week with her and made my mind up that I was only there to serve, I need nothing from her. She barely remembered who I was, and since I was her scapegoat that made it safe for me to give fully. I was able to spend time rubbing her feet, feeding her, and watching re-runs, not in defensive be-prepared mode, in the past tore the skin off my body about any topic that was in the room, very frightening because it landed on me. I spent my time forgiving her in my mind, and I realized she must have been tortured as a child, I don't know how bad it was for her, but I developed compassion for her. We in my mind had completed a lifetime contract, I am and was so relieved, that I felt free to be my own grown-up adult Mom. I won't forget, some of the more horrific words and actions. I do know that, but I can talk freely about the abuse without hating her, I have forgiven her as I do not know what brought her to be the person she was, she destroyed 5 children in 5 different ways we are all damaged, being aware of that I have more compassion for my sister and 3 brothers. I trust you will know your perfect time to be with them or not. I myself learned all things heal along the way of knowing yourself and trusting your intuition
Very inspiring. We're bad asses. My childhood was horrible but not quite as extreme. Ours was more emotional. I'm almost 37 and have only just begun to realise the extent of the trauma. Thanks for posting. Helps to connect and not feel so alone.
@@mimi7914for me I decided that I wouldn’t let anyone ever push me around or hurt me again. If I feel the slightest of disrespect I make sure to let person know, and to tell them I will not tolerate it again. I have lost jobs in the past because I wouldn’t bow down and let someone push me around. By asserting myself, I feel that it lets me freeze less because I know I can put people in their places. I feel that since I am no longer a child I will not tolerate being made to feel like one ever again. Unfortunately, that doesn’t apply while I am dreaming and I can only persevere and push through the sleepless nights.
I also got my concealed carry permit, and I carry everyday. I do that so I can never be victimized again. I do watch my temper though, and if I am carrying I will get away from the person who is offending me.
I would go no contact and stay away ❤
You are the first person I've seen doing this work that speaks about people who simply don't know what feeling safe/loved means. I grew up in an extremely abusive household where I was being beaten and cursed at daily by my parents. I don't know how to not feel like everything will crumble at any moment. Thank you for this video because I was really thinking that therapy isn't for me because the people who are so-called childhood wound healers can't understand I just don't know the concept of being loved or safe. And I'm 43 years old.
Well said!!!
I wish love for you.
I wish love for you too.
What finally helped me in the last quarter of my life was getting away from mean-spirited people and finding a little kindness and success among a different sort of people. In the meantime I just tried to do everything before me as well and as decently as I could.
What healing did you find after leaving that kind if people
Good path Mary. Well followed. It's a good one. It works well.
There is immense fulfilment in freedom. Being our chosen best self, brings us positive others who reflect those same qualities. Pleased to meet you here. 🙋🏻♀️
Best to you, Mary 😊
👍🏻🌸
The experience is so intense, my mind is in such panic, that I can’t even think of what to do, I’m stuck, but just at a lost of what to do. It’s a horrible feeling. I want to close my eyes and go into Denial, that’s the only thing I can think of at the time. Then afterwards guilt and shame I didn’t do anything
It leads to suicidal thoughts
It sounds to me that you want
things to be different
sometimes wanting something
to be different
is something important
it may be the beginning
of more & new work.
Same. I feel the same, even though i am in therapy,
Or just stay asleep
I feel the same way. I’m in such freeze after losing my job 8 months ago. It has paralysed me
i experience freeze almost daily it interrupts my critical rational logical thinking. thanx this helps me.
I think another word for freeze is comply, you give up surrender and become susceptible to control.
‘Fawn’ is the word for that. It’s the 4th stress response. Flight, fight, freeze or fawn.
It's also called robotization by Dr. Judith Herman from Trauma & Recovery. Robotization is reversible but fatal if not reversed & progresses to muselman.
Sometimes the fight response kick in when you await it the least, and it's awesome. So empowering
Sick world😢!People heal thyself and go out and live in outrageous joy.
Life as we know it is very short .
I only recently learned of the freeze response I believe I have been suffering from it for a long time. I am applying the strategies suggested with some success,finally!!! One thing I have realized is that I always structured my day with lists.Tasks to do, prioritizing them and checking it off. In freeze these lists now,I understand represents failure when not accomplished. Failure equals deep insecurity and sadness. I start feeling overwhelmed by even the simplest tasks. I then just want to go to sleep, take a nap. I let go of lists and free flow with my day and then pat myself on the back when I even clear the table. I express self gratitude for the little things. I’m starting to feel a bit more cheerful and optimistic. Finding this revelation in my 70s and understanding how my chaotic painful childhood with a very sad mother, abusive father, gave me this coping mechanism and now I can work with truly leaving that behind. I have some ideas why it has returned in my 70s but now I know this is a biological response and can be managed. Thank you!!!
I just watched this video and wow you described my whole existence! I jokingly tell people I read for a living, but it's the only why I can cope. Thank you for this video.
I’ve been doing Irene’s work for over 2 years now. I am an alumni with her SBSM program. I highly recommend it to anyone out there that feels a connection to her videos and blogs. This work does not have an “ending”. It is an everyday mindful journey/path for your life. Listening to this video reminds me of what to do for my healing journey. I am one who never got a map for feeling safe. Having to teach this to yourself after a lifetime of not understanding what is going on with your body is not an easy thing. But knowledge is power and Irene’s teaching and tools give me the belief that I can find my path up out of the darkness. As I continue to immerse myself in all of the wonderful information Irene so generously gives and with patience and kindness toward myself, I find myself making progress every single day. I love you Irene. You have changed my life and I am so grateful I found you and this truth.
HI Janet, Seth here with Team Lyon. Thanks so much for this moving and wise sharing. We're so glad you joined us!
Hi Janet! Diana here with Team Lyon. We were wondering if we could use your words as a testimonial?
I will soon :) 🎉
I cannot afford Irene's courses. What can I do to get out of freeze response?
I love it that you totally understand people so well that you literally said "if you look up 'possom' - Don't do that right now," lol 😅❤❤❤
Oh gosh!!
I’m living with family because of finances. It’s definitely not emotionally safe for me!
I fully agree with you, it extremely difficult to heal my freeze when I don’t feel safe!!
I can’t fight and I can’t leave, stuck in freeze!!
Dang!😓
Deborah Riley, Jen here from Irene's Team. It can be more challenging to heal when we are living in a toxic environment, and there are many students in Irene's course and program who have done it. It can take time and dedication, and it is often possible to heal even while living in a home that doesn't feel emotionally safe.
Creating space for yourself where possible can be important, as can finding ways to engage with this work. I'll share links to a few of Irene's resources that you might check out if they resonate with you.
Four ways to spark up our social engagement nervous system without socializing. - irenelyon.com/2020/06/14/four-ways-to-spark-up-our-social-engagement-nervous-system-without-socializing/
7 Simple Steps to DeStress - irenelyon.com/7-steps-opt-in-IL
Drop In Class - irenelyon.com/drop-in-class-1
Oh man, I am right there with you.
I feel you! I currently have to live with my mom who I’ve never really gotten along with. I have not been able to figure out how to leave because of being in a freeze state. I start therapy next month and have made my room my safe space. Love to everyone figuring it out as well ❤
Same here. But we can do this 👊!
I’m exactly same situation myself- it’s 4 yrs now & I’m getting physically sick- it’s like a descent into a further Hell and I’ve nobody to turn to or get the Therapy i was told I needed 12yrs ago.
I pray ur situation has improved & will look at resources on this channel ...
Thanks 4 sharing what so many endure and live this this painfully dysfunctional environment while trying to heal.
Love & Light to U. Wud love to hear how ur doing?🙏🦋
I went no contact with my narcissistic mom 4 years ago. I’m struggling with dissociation.
This video hit home. Not being myself and being quiet or good to avoid being yelled at or the target for ridicule was true for me.
Another thing that stuck out was not knowing how to “drive the car though someone’s expecting me to.” I feel like I’ve gone through hell and when I escaped it the advice I was given made me feel like I needed to just “let go” of what was done to me and get on with life. But after the abuse/trauma I’m left like a zombie because I don’t know how to live.
It’s a lot like a person who was in prison at 18 years old for a 25 year sentence. They get out of prison at about 40 and are expected to live in society when they have no idea how..
if someone went to prison at 18 and got a 25 yaer sentence they would be 43 when they got out not 40
@@Sh0n0 did you read my comment? Did you see the portion where I said “about” 40. It was a generalizing statement to say they’ll be out “by the time they’re in their 40’s.”
I bet you’re fun at parties… 🙄
@@ethanplacella hey ethan amigo. Sorry english is not my first language it is my actually 3rd language first is japanese then spanish, but even if i am japanese my wieners is 7.5 inches long which globally is above average despite the stigmitization that asians having small wieners. I hope your new year is going great and that you make so much money this year, people will say wow, that guy has so much money? Then they ask for handouts and you say no, and they cry. Thay is my dream. To have so much money i can make others cry when i am driving my ferrari 458. Thanks
@@ethanplacella Ethan I re read your comment and must also say, you think I am fun at parties? I wish.. I am not fun at parties AT ALL. crowds scare me, i dissociate immediately and sweat profusely and can never let loose, even if i try to get drunk, my uptightness is so strong even if i down 5 pints of beer, i am still hyper alert, hyper vigilant and nervous, it sucks.
I have always dealt with this. My narcissist parents use me to be their scapegoat and my childhood was fill with being shamed and criticized so I am always on high alert, but I am now working on this...
Recently I have spent many weeks crying because of the childhood I lost, apparently this is a healthy thing, even if it is painful it is no longer the numb pain that I always had, more lively pain, and it is a release of pent of emotions, so I am becoming whole? And once it is complete, I can move on? I hope so.
Then hopefully when I am no longer scared I can make so much money my parents no longer financially blackmail me, and I can say hey, I have a Ferrari 458 and am financially independent, fuck you. And I'll marry a beautiful wife and have beautiful kids that I love and never yell at, and I;ll say hey, no you can't meet them. That is my dream. I wish you have an amazing new year.
Thank you Einstein.
We know 18+25=43.
Primary School level.
Thank you immensely for this accurate description on the freeze response, I have never felt so seen and heard. I try to explain this to people in my life and they don’t even begin to understand what I’m experiencing, they seem to think I’m doing these things intentionally and can suddenly make it stop. I have never heard this described so well and I thank you.
Wow you exactly described my childhood, withdrawing and being alone with books. I used to win all kinds of prizes in school for doing the most book reports. The silver lining is this is what led me to develop my mind, my ability to think and reason, and learn at a very high level- so I am grateful for that aspect of my abuse.
"Regulated caregiver" is key. My dysregulated mother was the worst driver on the lot.
Every time I watch videos like these I end up feeling more anxious and scared and traumatized because I feel like a failure that other people can release their trauma as time goes by and mine only compounds. I'm so jealous and confused of people who are successful and stable because I don't know what it's like to have a mindset where you can compartmentalize bad things that have happened to you and bad thoughts resulting subsequently from those bad life experiences and then still having and reaching goals and maintaining steady relationships with trust intact. I mean what kind of sorcery is that?!
I'm like you in many respects, beginning to heal, but I still carry alot. I think our perspective is off, sometimes I can chang it and see a new reality but I fall back to my old way of seeing things, even if I know in reality its incorrect. It's like I'm stuck and cant get past a certain point. I know at my age I have very little hope of having a genuine healthy relationship. Hell I dont think I even know how to do it. But I work with what I do have. Perspective is a powerful thing. Also I have been micro dosing mushrooms for 6months. Very helpful and also stimulates the growth of new neural networks. Best of Luck to both of us.
Hello, Sophia from Team Lyon here. Thank you for sharing this important feedback. This free mini-training speaks to people of every background and healing stage. You need no prior experience and there is no comparison to anyone else irenelyon.com/healing-trauma
Please someone tell me if this sounds like shutdown: after trauma spent 6months in extreme fight flight. Then one day everything shifted. I felt like I wasn’t real and in a dream. Ever since then all I want to do is stay in bed, if I try to do anything: socialise, work, activities anything I shut down. My brain hurts, headaches, extreme fatigue and an uncontrollable need to lie in bed with covers over head. And once I get to bed I breakdown and cry because I feel like I can’t live my life and I feel guilty for not doing the things I want to. Please tell me if this feels like what Irene is discussing. I need to know what’s wrong
Sounds exactly like me after leaving an abusive relationship. I had a brain scan done and was diagnosed with chronic PTSD and depression. Feeling like you’re living in a dream is a trauma response called disassociation and is a form of freezing.
Hope you are still hanging in there. I've been there. If you are still in this spot, please think about seeing a counselor trained in trauma, if you do not like them, get a different one. Same goes for meds. If they dont work and you feel they are not listening find someone else to prescribe them. My hope is that you find healing and self acceptance. Love and Sare Journeys to you.
I didn't read a wrong.
Life is so many moments,
some moments are seemingly forever,
others are over
before they could be described.
Healing is the bruise,
between the injury
and the repaired.
Yes! That’s me. First trauma, 24/7 anxiety and then shifted to numb and frozen ..
I'm all in tears. Thank-you for making and posting this video🙏
This resonates so much.
I can’t believe I’m only learning about this now.
Thank you so much Irene.
I'm on my way to recovery. Thank God ❤❤حالة separation and freezing should be understood. This helps us recover and get out of it.
Not having a map, not being able to drive, and not having fuel are different problems.
I have feedback about a nuance to this approach, which is overall extremely insightful. When you say we “have” to do this work…I know intellectually that you mean that “it must be done in order to achieve the goal”, but unfortunately(and I know this from my own experience), the words “must” “have to” “should” etc are super loaded and point to an extremely fundamental safety issue for human beings. My own understanding is that fundamental safety stems from having the choice to refuse and not be punished. I see that almost all people have a tendency to take on self-care or self-improvement as if they “must” and basically have a sense of self-punishment if they don’t do the “healthy” thing… everything from eating choices to work choices to self-care and “play” choices. It’s tricky to find a way to communicate to people that these self care things “shouldn’t”(❤) be forced on oneself as much as they shouldn’t be forced on others!! Is this something that you have become aware of or struggled with at all? It’s a very deep concept and I think it explains why many people who try so hard for so long(such as myself) make so little felt progress.
It's kind of the demand avoidant thing isn't it. Smaller goals and plenty of time helps. Giving yourself the best fighting chance, including in terms of morale/emotions.
My poor wife was abused as a child and now, even as an adult, she freezes several times throughout the day when startled. It happens a lot when driving in the car, you know with all the surprises we have when driving with cars cutting in front of us and traffic, dealing with parking lots etc. (We have also been t-boned while backing out of a parking spot). She will even shake a little, but her body locks up. I have to soothe her and calm her down, it is terrifying. The poor woman lives in this state 24/7.
Maybe this is why I dislike driving so much. Much love to your wife! I'm glad she has your love and support!
Vipassana gave me the skills I needed. Once I experienced fearlessness, I knew how off and wrong everyones perception of fear is.
Same 🎉
You are totally describing me in childhood!
I’m so grateful for you and your videos, I’ve recently begun this work and I’m feeling a bit less scared and more hopeful. Thank you for being here. ❤️
Thank you for this video. I just wanted to add that I am processing and integrating trauma energy in my feet, legs and arms. In my feet was a lot of anger and flight. I had to do kick boxing and run to process that. In my legs was a time I ran over the lawn mower cord and got electrocuted. In my arms is a lot of nervous energy and just energy where I feel crappy. I have always made things to shift my mood. I've done every kind of craft. It worked to sooth me but pushed a lot of emotions into my arms which I am expressing now. My whole arms, hands and shoulders are full of emotional material. I had a lot of material in my chest, hips and my back. I also had material in my face and the top of my head but I can say without a doubt that the material in my arms is the longest to process.
I think my wounded inner child was behind my stomach. After a serious cry I felt the pain was finally gone ❤❤❤
I am so thankful your channel came to my feed
I’ve been feeling like this for awhile now after seeing a counselor who could not regulate my nervous system. I wish I saw a more competent counselor who was able to calm my nervous system instead of leaving me in an anxious state.
RY1979, Jen here from Team Lyon. Sorry to hear about your experience with the counselor. Irene has a video about finding a good somatic practitioner. I'll link to it in case you're interested in seeking out a nervous system practitioner to help you work with your experience.
How to Find a Good Nervous System Practitioner - irenelyon.com/2019/11/14/how-to-find-a-good-practitioner/
Amazing information. Thank you 🙏 from a shattered soul , trying to n heal n BBB lost at sea. Love your work✨
I didn't understand how powerful and encompassing grief can be. Unfortunately I went into fear. I experienced an an anxiety disorder. I then stopped functioning. I am now largely recovered. But I am left with guilt for not dealing with my responsibilities after the two deaths.
How did you recover? I’m in this extreme anxiety state that’s debilitating to the point I can’t go out
I relate to many of these situations people are experiencing, thank you all for the comments and your truth-telling I am less lonely and less in my own judgment because of your willingness to share. From the video, I never put together my form of collapse. I put off eating as long as I can each day, I get overwhelmed by the need to sleep about 5 minutes after eating a meal I become a zombie and have to sleep. I believe I have used napping as my collapse, I am also aware this has turned into a physical disability to digest, and I am working on that with great healthy foods and nurturing my digestive system. If I apply that to my mental well-being it is a match in my life, there are many memories and current situations that I just can't digest properly. Having this mental awareness I believe this will help me tend to my body working better. I am the family scapegoat, the family has a joke about me being able to sleep anywhere including on a rock. It has its advantages I can sleep on any airplane, in a car, you name it I can sleep no matter the circumstance, I sleep like the dead! The disadvantage is I miss out and working is difficult if not impossible. Thank you for the new awareness, and God bless you all
That sounds like Narcolepsy or at the least food allergies. Have you seen a doctor to get tested or offered medication? You may have to cut out some foods you think are healthy. Modern medecine is linking a lot of physical problems we face to the fact that our foods are not "healthy" anymore and can be very destuctive to some that have damaged digestive systems. Just adding the right digestive enzymes to your meals may help. A good start ing place would be to get on an elimination diet and gradually add in foods that don't cause your fatigue problems. There are many books and information online about how to do the diet. Also many RUclips channels. Gluten and dairy should be the first to go and many people have cured their autoimmune diseases just by doing that. Look up GAPS diet or the Autoimmune Paleo diet. Good luck.. I hope you can figure it out because that is a depressing way to live. Blessings!
White rice puts me into instant coma after eating.
Do you have that with every food or just some foods?
Hi there - if I could just suggest you talk to your therapist about trauma-caused adhd. One if the symptoms can be this intense need or ability to sleep, and or this excruciating sensation of exhaustion and dumbfoundedness at how easily most people seem to be able to function compared to how utterly exhausted you might feel. That was me till I figured out the adhd-as-trauma symptom. To protect me, my sweet brain learned to NOT accept any dopamine (anti-freeze) and I became so good at not accepting dopamine, that I basically short-circuited that normal process in my brain (bran chemistry etc). I was in such extreme anxiety all the time that zero dopamine was the only way I (my nervous system) could cope. I had to start w microdoses of adder all extended release, bc my nervous system was so sensitive to “light”, it would trigger anxiety. But overtime my doc and I were able to retrain my brain to accept dopamine and OH MY GOSH!!!!! I had NO idea what non-exhaustion was! I feel like I was saved honestly! Anyway, hope that resonates or helps. Your testimonial read a lot like mine. Who would’ve thunk it. I am the least adhd person bc I’m so chill I’m almost dead. But yup, it’s true. And beneath the zombie was/is all the maddening freak out. Good luck and God bless you on your journey (even though that sounds soo corny).
And yes I thought maybe I was narcoleptic? Until I meet someone with that disorder. That is NOT what you have. Whole different can of beans.
Same w food allergies. Nothing that would shut me down. Dopamine, or lack thereof.
Omg this is literally the best video that addresses a chronic freeze response. Much appreciated!
I absolutely love Irene, I’m on day 10 of 21 Day Tune Up and have a big trauma release yesterday. However few hours later I over did it walking and I went into shutdown, still feeling it now but knowledge is power so I’m not scared like I would have been a month ago. Looking forward to SBSM.xx
Is this tune up you speak about part of her program ?
@@chowceo it’s a starter course for a one off fee that you have lifetime access to, so you can work through it as many times as you want to.
@@chowceo - Seth here with team Lyon. Yes, it's her lower-fee starter program. You can read about it here... 21daytuneup.com/
What was the trauma release of you don’t mind sharing ? How did you kno it was one ?
@@jaykayel_silva that's the beautiful thing with this work you don't need to know the trauma or revisit the pain and suffering unless of course it comes up but traumas just pass once you've built the capacity. This work is amazing xx
3:25 my childhood. Thank you for making this video
I haven't listened to you for a while and remembered now how much I appreciate your clarity and style!!
thank you for this video - I am challenged by a client's "stuckness" right now, and this was the centering reminder that I needed!
Soooo good! I’ve can’t wait to dive into more of your work! 🙏
Thank you Irene for all the information you share. I have rewatched your videos several times super valuable material.
Thank you 🙏
OMG this is so real. This is how I feel frozen .
This helped me hugely today, thank you
This was PHENOMENALLY PROFOUND.
Thank You❣️
Thanks for posting this. Describes what I have done pretty much my whole life. Our home was pretty violent with an alcoholic abusive father. I remember laying i bed with my sister listening to the parent arguing and fighting. Laid there in silence - never even talking to my sister about what was going on. Carried that on through my marriages and relationships as well. Once something would happen - could even be something stupid - there would reach a point where my feelings just turned off. Even now - if something is going to be emotional, I just shut down. Really hit home with this one - thanks.
I love your videos. Always in time and on point.❤
This video is so good. Better than I could've realized in the past. Gotta watch those three videos again and get the 21 day tune up but also afraid of so need more time alone in nature to expand safety.
I just found this video in my YT suggestions and can relate to so much and so many of the brave comments here… I’ve known for a long time that I freeze and disassociate from society.. it’s pretty lonely but I feel safer by myself.. I’ve observed myself being super interested and always looking for extremely intense people, situations and world events, it’s near obsessive.. still figuring out why, but I suppose I am trying to understand it and to be as prepared as possible if it were to become a reality… for instance, watching documentaries about serial killers or the wars taking place right now… as a result I’ve ‘collected’ too much stuff to be as prepared as possible and feel constantly overwhelmed by it… so much to do and constantly exhausted, now seen as a ‘conspiracy theorist’ by my adult kids doesn’t help either… I will check out the other videos and hopefully I can finally create a better life.. thank you all 🙏❣️🕊️
This was a really good video! Described my situation perfectly...
WOW YOURE ABSOLUTELY THE BEST THANK YOU SO MUCH
You are such a gift to my journey! Thank you for being you!
I've been in therapy for over 10 years and have made the most progress in the last 6 months or so. I also have my bachelor's degree in psychology with a minor in applied behavioral science. I watch a ton of content on how the brain and the nervous system work and I research trauma and healing way more than I probably should trying to find healing for myself, but I don't know how to do that in this world. I'm very much stuck in the mental state of "The world is a scary unsafe place, we're all going to die". I have an ACE score of 10/10, i've experienced a large share of trauma as an adult (a good chunk of it at the hands of the mental health system." I am doing my best, but I'm 32 and still feel very much like I struggle with the basics in life. I've made progress, I have moved into an anger stage of healing, being angry about the things that have happened to me, realizing I never deserved to be treated the way that I have. But I still don't know how to feel safe. My earliest memories aren't pleasant so they tell me I probably never really got to experience a safe attachment with my caregivers. Life has always been dangerous and unpredictable from as early as I can remember. I have dissociative identity disorder and work with a therapist who is super knowledgable on the topic who also has her own dissociative disorder. I came across this video because i feel like my nervous system is stuck in the freeze response and it's interferring with all areas of my life. I sit in my office at work dissociated most of the time with my computer in front of me, keeping it from locking, so that if someone knocks on my office door I can quickly look like I'm working. I feel so much guilt and shame that I'm operating this way at work, but the dissociation is paralyzing. I know I had a traumatic experience at a job about a year ago, and I know this is a different job, with different people and I actually really like my supervisor and my organization and my coworkers and I don't want this freeze response to ruin this opportunity. I"m not really sure what to do, so I'm turning to commenting on a youtube video, knowing there's a good chance that there won't be a response. BUt I'm desperate to function and not be stuck in this freeze response at work.
Crystal Nicole, Jen here from Team Lyon. It's great to hear that you've been making a lot of progress in your therapy the last 6 months. It sounds like you've learned a lot from your research and have a good deal of awareness about your pattern of freezing (which often shows up as dissociation) and what may be underlying this.
You mentioned that you think should probably try to find healing for yourself, but don't know how to do that. I want to acknowledge all that you're already doing. It sounds to me like you're in the process of creating healing for yourself.
When we didn't learn to feel safe as a young person, or experienced adverse experiences, it can often help to think in terms of "moving in the direction of safety.". For example, is it possible to notice when something feels a little less unsafe? Alongside this, it can help to know that it takes time to shift your nervous system to a "new normal" and small steps add up.
As far as finding healing goes, you might continue to dive into Irene's YT channel and free resources. I'll link to her "New Here" resource in case you'd like to check that out. She also offers a paid course called the 21 Day Nervous System Tune Up where you can learn basic nervous system education and practices.
The "Tune Up" is a self-study course so you can do it on your time, at your pace, and you also have the opportunity to ask trained nervous system practitioners questions about your experience in the course. I'll link to that too in case you'd like to check it out!
New Here? - irenelyon.com/new-here/
21 Day Nervous System Tune Up - 21daytuneup.com/
I would simply say: go to a medium! Spirituality was my saviour (i went to spiritual guide for enlightment but medium are better than therapists in mY opinion)
Stay open
Love❤
That’s quite a journey you’ve been on…with trauma and with learning about the psyche and body connections. If you haven’t already come across IFS, Internal Family Systems, I suggest taking a look. There are many good overviews and guided meditations online.
The fact that you are so self aware is half the battle. Best of luck. Sending you much love and light 🙌
@@saharyounes3069everyone says that to me and then they will dismiss me (not saying you did that). I even had a therapist tell me she couldn't help me further because she basically gets people to self awareness and that can take years.
I saw this and KNEW to play it. Thank you. Plus I have Seligmans Learned Helplessness.
EMDR helps so much- I quit when It was too emotionally uncomfortable
Listening to this I suddenly realized my whole torso felt like stone...and I thought I had been doing enough stretching and self massage for this zone...and yes, my childhood and the following traumatic events made me like that...and by simply realizing that "stone" exists made me feel "softer" in the said zone.
Massive thank u! Just found your channel, have listened to many other specialists, but u offer a really deep and profound knowledge! ❤
There’s a scripture about asking God to give us a heart of flesh in place of a heart of stone. Your comment made me remember it.
Thank You for making these videos! I don't have access to therapy at the moment and this helps a lot! ❤❤❤
Love that you say 'little people'❤
Going to school becomes an escape or watching startrek provides imagination alternate possibilities.
Unless you're bullied in school. Books and nature were life savers for me.
School was my friendly learning getaway. Now if I'm triggered by narcissists or abusive angry persons, I avoid or even change jobs. As a INFJ personality, the Wenzes life coach channel provides insight.
I think we can fear, fear. We just shouldn't avoid it. We walk towards it. So many layers of fear can be present and yet we can still feel it all and survive.
What if safety is unsafe? I panic whenever I’m not overwhelmed or under threat because I don’t trust positive feelings, feeling safe to me was never safe. I’m not sure if this makes sense. I would have been able to articulate it a little better when I wasn’t so frozen 😅
When an emotion or experience becomes familiar in childhood it feels “reassuring” even if it’s a negative experience because of that familiarity. When, as adults, we begin to create experiences or feeling states that are actually healthier or happier we can seek the familiarity of the unpleasant states from childhood because the new better experience are unfamiliar. Acknowledging this helped me become more and more okay with creating a good life (even if it feels unfamiliar at first).
You’re pretty intelligent to be able to describe that experience, I didn’t understand it was even going on until I came across Peter Michealson’s Why We Suffer blog! You might find some helpful information there 👍
I would say that the face expresses and feels lots of emotions so it's not just from the neck to the groin, and extremities can also be involved but rarely by themselves, but like being tense or shaky in conjunction with feelings in the core.
A lil cray…my middle name is Irene. Last name pronounced Lionheart. Prolly mentioned that already. 😝
An empath raised by narcissistic mom n the enabling husband/ father. The trauma I’ve lived I’ve buried then masked over. And it’s killing me.
May anyone reading these words find true peace, you are worthy, no matter what that voice inside ur head says. That’s NOT ur voice, so don’t have to own the negative bs it tells you. Tell that voice “you’re not talking about me, you’re talking to me, about someone I will never be” it is the voice of that narcissist or bully or whomever tore you down when you needed to be heard and seen. We do deserve peace & happiness. 🕊️ 🫶
🕊️
I had fear and freeze stemming from my childhood and onwards. I was raised into such an environment and i am anxious of life and quiet but people confused me with being shy yet I don't have confidence in society due to the repetitive traumas and not being able to express or ask for help to anyone as a child and had to just continue life like it was normal. I am still affected now due to the after effects and i am in my 40's. I appreciate this video and have subscribed. Thank you and i wish us all healing and recovery and self learning and at least having the skills and awareness to cope better and get out of things more quickly.
@LYRIKALMASTER, Jen here from Irene's Team. It's good to hear that this video resonates with you. Another came to mind reading your post that I'll share in case it's of interest to you.
My $0.02 Worth on Introverts & Extroverts + Safety in Abusive Relationship - ruclips.net/video/FXF9BVT7OjQ/видео.html
Thanks, I've been collecting info lately on how to overcome Echoism. This was very helpful.
Priceless
There is also faint and fawn: fight-flight-faint-freeze-fawn
The fainting happens in some cases when you can't fight or flee, and your automatic nervous system is overloaded throwing someone into Dorsal Vagal Shutdown.
You *most definitely* need to be able to feel fear when you are in the presence of a predator and if you've lived with an abusive, narcissistic parent who physically, emotionally, psychologically, and financially (or s*xually) abuses you, your barometer for predators may NOT clue you in when one is in your presence. You could have a roommate who is a predator and you may never recognize it (unless they flip into predator mode on you at some point, and then it's too late).
Dorsal Vagal Shutdown is something people might consider looking up if you don't already know what it is.
I've been stuck in states on this spectrum for over a year due to a major trauma event mixed with existing c-ptsd and ASD. Making slow progress, having weekly psychology and monthly psychiatry sessions. Gone from borderline catatonic to able to leave the house with carers a couple of times a week to do basic living duties like food shopping and psych sessions
Just kinda wanted to add my experience, and I guess re-state that it can be a very very slow process for those of us who are receptive to treatment
When the wind blows the feeling goes. Ground and release , with each breeze , we come out of freeze. No longer on my knee’s. ❤❤❤ Namaste 🙏 ❤ “ FEEL IT TO BE FREE OF IT“ ❤From fear, to love 💕 what would my best self do ?
Thank you @Irene Lyon I’m in a freeze response now There is urgent paperwork and job searching needing to be done and steps to finish up The decipn makers with power have been cruel and deceptive, taking back what they said, causing destabilisation. Physically sore all over , also infection, chronic sore throat. Most trauma has occurred after coming to new country, so in that sense, although an older student not a child, was a child in this culture. Had nurturing people as a child so was fortunate in that way. Many threats with eventual overload being too much after so much devaluing of efforts. Have not been functional for much of past few weeks. Not normally fearful, but courageous as a base, but here has been constant trauma, emergency, wrecking of efforts, waste of all efforts, constantly, and all exhaustive efforts are distanced and wasted, no point in functioning, all my efforts received with suspicion, trashed, damaged, and have to redo, again and again, actual harm being done.
I have been following Irene for years now. 21 day Nervous system tune up, onto year three of SBSM, all the free you tube videos years prior. I have done everything but feel like I have done nothing. It seems very wordy / semantics - let’s say; it is so deep that It makes no sense but perfect sense. It’s almost magical the transition you go through. Practice, practice, practice. I just watched the Disney movie “Turning Red” and so much of Irene’s teachings are in this movie. I am teaching others symbiotically by my own journey, healing and knowledge. It really is amazing. Thanks team Lyon! 🙌🏼❤️👏🏻
Great insight into the process of healing the chronic freeze response. Thank you Irene for sharing
You just explained why my son was so nervous since pregnancy, he was always running, didn't sleep well, no health issues but developed kind of autism, but I've really worked on his regulation and safety, and he's moslty ok now. I was born to very sick family (schizophrenic mother, absent father, no grandoarents, narcissistic sister), so there was never safety in our house. Then relationship with a narcissist and having a child with him, when he was screaming at me during pregnancy and in postpartum. I left but now there's a lot of financial issues to handle, on top of keeping my son regulated and trying to stay calm myself. I sleep 10 hrs at night and do little during the day, almost all energy goes to my son. I want to earn money, travel, create, and I believe it's all possible, as I saw how my son is thriving and came out of autism
As someone who had similar parents to you (schizo mum and addicted dad), i feel for you. Well done for trying. Its not easy, i know you have been through a lot to. Well done for showing for your son. Much peace and hope
Wow, that is super impressive!! Honestly! You are sooo strong! You really really really impressed me. It's amazing how you are managing life being a single mother and oh, are you A GOOD ONE. I think its exactly as you say, you see that your son got better, its possible for you too :) im sure this work of Irene is going to help you... From what you are saying you are low on energy, I had the same, but I had a totally groundbreaking shift in my physiology when I watched a video of Irene's, it was something called "victim identity". In it Irene explained that when we still identify as victims of abuse (instead of independent adults in a position of power now and with all the ability to change everything in our life for the better) we often go into freeze. As I realized that im not a victim anymore, I experienced a groundbreaking shift in my physiology that was going out of freeze- my energy started to be muuuch higher, literally went from sleeping 12-14 h to max 7 (can't even sleep more now, my nody is sooo vibrant with energy!), The things that git my tired dont tire me half as much. It may be the case for you too, that you are in the state of freeze. I hope it helps. Again congratulations on what you have already accomplished 😊 wishing you all the best :)
Start a RUclips channel.❤
Generational Trauma. Tough. Have you looked into Steve and Odille Remmert's therapy for childhood trauma?
Great video and content, Irene!
I don't think you CAN until what is causing the trauma ceases.
Thank you so much Irene
Thank you for doing this video!
I approve of most of the language choices you are making for the subject. (I am a trauma therapist).
Good job
I recognize myself here. Digestive problems, chronic pain, chronic illness yes, yes, yes. The reader, off in the corner. For most of my life. I do look for spots that hurt less on my body. Good to know@
Thank you 🙏🏻
Recovering from an an injury I was frozen for nearly two months. I thought I would never create again, and it added to the layers of trauma in my life that I was already recovering from. I am healing by the grace of God!
Wooow, this little thumb felt so good it made the tears come out. You got me). But really, thank you so much for this lesson. Since it struck so much emotion I am surely wont be forgetting it. I am very keen look into other things you have. Actually my first question is how the feeling of the tight areas works, I feel like it is going to be very helpful to learn that. If you folks in the comments feel like sharing your thoughts on interoception and in general, I would love that!
Irene, you've brought tears to my eyes, finally someone other than my therapist (a neuropsychologist expert in trauma) gets me. Funnily I've always told her she doesn't count, n=1 lol. I have DID from countless different types of trauma, an unbelievably chaotic life of neglect, abuse of all types, and polar opposite lives with each parent, one a psychopath, the other with BPD. I answer yes to every question on the ACE score and then thought what about dad in jail while mum is a psychiatric hospital? Lol. You've described me and my paralysis. Thank you. I will sign up to your course even though it terrified me.
Did you end up signing up?
@@jessicabasurto9485 no I didn't.
@@VandTheVan oh did you decide it was not for you?
@@jessicabasurto9485 I decided to just keep working with my neuropsychologist about the polyvagal theory. To me it starts with working more on the traumas that cause the freeze. Then I think it will be time to work more on the automatic responses.
@@VandTheVan that’s amazing!! I wish I could find a neuropsychologist here around me area
It’s a real shame that RUclips pairs an ad for SandyHook Promise with this video. Discussing how to come out of freeze, but then getting the stark reminder of how unsafe the world can be. How unfortunate.
The simple answer is to engage the sympathetic nervous system.
Freeze is the defensive aspect of the parasympathetic nervous system. Loose stools, depression, IBS, dissociation etc are common symptoms of chronic parasympathetic stress response. If you're too depressed to exercise, hyperventilate for a minute a day. Elevate your heart rate before seeking a felt sense of safety. The body can't think in language, it won't feel a sense of safety until it feels like it's ran or fought.
Avoiding my triggers helps me!
49 year old make, engineer and amature Trithlete - I train a lot.
Had burning, tingling tongue and mouth, tightness and all kinds of weird sensations.
All started after a big relocation, alone, and other life events.
Medical professional can't find anything wrong!
I hope these skills work
RunPjs, Jen here from Team Lyon. It certainly sounds like there could be a connection to nervous system dysregulation based on what you describe.
People have a very wide range of symptoms and experiences that often shift as they take steps to grow nervous system regulation and capacity and heal trauma. It is prudent to get checked out by a healthcare practitioner, an it sounds like you've done this already (it's quite common in this work for people to have symptoms that aren't easily explained by allopathic medicine).
Seth Lyon, Irene's colleague and husband, wrote about the many strange experiences he's through as he's explored his work. I'll link to it in case you want to check it out.
Fantastic Tales - sethlyon.com/fantastic-tales/
@@IreneLyon thank you, looks good. And yes been thoroughly checked out am now waiting to see a neurologist.
@@RunPJs, good to hear. This work tends to attract many people with "mystery symptoms" and we do often find that growing regulation leads to the dissipation and resolution of many symptoms.
Do you take supplements with vitamin B6 in them? Pyridoxine or P5P?
@@rachellewis5016why?