Growing Up with Religious Anxiety, Shame, and Guilt

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  • Опубликовано: 24 авг 2024

Комментарии • 125

  • @cynthiayoung5060
    @cynthiayoung5060 2 года назад +51

    The main reason I left my church was COVID. I saw through all the ugliness from televangelists and the hatred they had. It confused me and on top of that everything about Trump. How could they not see Trump for who he was? COVID was a blessing for me. It was a pause and reset button for me. A chance for reflection and what I wanted for my life.

    • @devidaughter7782
      @devidaughter7782 2 года назад +1

      so wonderful when we come to trust our own minds and feelings and senses about things, rather than doubt ourselves, diminish the dissonance we feel, and defer to the (male) 'authorities' who project such certainty and 'right-ness'! I am STILL in this process of learning to trust and affirm my own mind, after many decades of being out of the church! it surfaces now with other (spiritual) leaders, who say stuff with certainty, that doesn't quite sit right with me, but they seem so sure about. I find I still go into that old pattern of doubting my own assessment, and thinking "well they seem so sure, and they display so many gifts, so maybe I'm the one missing something?" your post gives me hop, and encouragement, so thankyou!

    • @Youidiott
      @Youidiott 10 месяцев назад +1

      Yep, they're radical. Devotion to Trump is disgusting and hypocritical. I don't know what the hell is wrong with those people.

  • @user-yr1cq5nx8l
    @user-yr1cq5nx8l Год назад +5

    This message was so inspiring! At 61years old, I am still dealing with the guilt and shame from the church. I am no longer a believer either. And, still work through a daily dose of it from my childhood.
    Whenever, I bring up my religious trauma. Others around me, say, that isn't the way they teach the message anymore. So, I thought that through the years that they were teaching a more "forgiving" and "loving" God, but clearly looking at your age, the message is still the same!!! You are a sinner, and all that nonsense.

  • @jmdsservantofgod8405
    @jmdsservantofgod8405 2 года назад +66

    I grew up in the Catholic Church…… they were heavy on guilt!……normal conversations were like: “I feel guilty, do you feel guilty… yes I feel guilty too…. Oh good….. that’s good, we all feel guilty…. What a relief!….we are all ok!” 🤪🤪🤪

    • @hellepost1439
      @hellepost1439 2 года назад +3

      “I think it is very beautiful for the to accept their lot, to share it with the passion of Christ. I think the world is being much helped by the suffering of the poor people.” Mother Teresa... who when she needed palliative care, received it in a modern American hospital.‼️‼️‼️

    • @heyfella5217
      @heyfella5217 13 дней назад

      I distinctly remember being told by my church that suffering leads to holiness.

  • @Niki-gi2dn
    @Niki-gi2dn Год назад +3

    As an ex-fundie, I also felt a lot of guilt and shame growing up. Mostly mine came from doing all the Christian things I thought I was supposed to do: get saved, get baptized, spread the "word"... I thought I would feel lighter and inspired but I didn't. So I made it mean there was something fundamentally wrong with me, that Satan had a hold on me, and that I was "bad". I then had to overcompensate to show that I'm "good". What a nightmare. I still deal with guilt and shame, perfectionism, and people pleasing (now in my late 30s). I just feel so messed up. Oh yeah and anxiety out the wazooo. Thank you for your videos, they are a great help to know we aren't alone.

  • @professorg7387
    @professorg7387 Год назад +6

    We are an OSDD system with autism, who was raised in a Christian Cult family. Thank you for bravely sharing your story! 🌈✨🧠

  • @roseeblossom
    @roseeblossom 3 года назад +76

    I don't normally comment on videos, but I wanted to encourage you. I'm so glad you're able to reparent yourself as you raise your own child to see their value and worth, just by being alive. I'm excited to watch the rest of your videos, and I've followed you. Keep it up.

    • @ExFundieDiaries
      @ExFundieDiaries  3 года назад +10

      Thank you so much!! I really appreciate your kind comment :)

    • @learntime1202
      @learntime1202 Год назад

      @@ExFundieDiaries I think you should search the truth and I know Christianity is a cult but I didn’t leave the fathers word…I found the actual truth …I came across a video of you exposing certain things all the way to you having pronouns ..sad to say this is how it always turns out …you don’t know the truth so you are trying. To find a place to fit in. Then after someone gets so far they will join in coming for the children next …it’s dangerous. I hope you find peace

  • @chanellover2143
    @chanellover2143 Год назад +6

    I recently saw an awful article titled “ signs god doesn’t love you”. It felt so cruel and hurtful, it was the final straw for me.

  • @HingWenYi
    @HingWenYi 2 года назад +34

    I too, am a ex-fundie, your videos are my everything. Religious fundemantalism and extremism is the main problem in my country, Malaysia.

    • @lauranorwar
      @lauranorwar Год назад

      I hope you are doing well!! ❤️

  • @chaotic-goodartistry3903
    @chaotic-goodartistry3903 2 года назад +24

    my (Christian) family had a family friend (also christian, but more prosperity gospel) live with us for 3 years when i was 12-15. She was supposed to stay 5 months but stayed 3 years and that was particularly awful because she would take out her frustration of not making enough etc etc to move out (which undoubtably was worsened by her prosperity gospel) on my family (who was a reminder that she was failing at finding her own place), and particularly me.
    Anyway it wasn't until the end of her lovely stay with us that she was taking out the frustration in her own life out on me doing anything that annoyed her, because until that point whenever I would exist around her she would find anything that annoyed her; looking too happy, looking too sad, walking too loudly, not being completely adept at picking up social cues at 13, accidentally humming around her, any adhd symptom I presented (just recently figured that out cause of the deep masking I did to accommodate her), she would guilt me for it like I was inconsiderate should know better. Basically, she made me responsible for her emotional wellbeing and would guilt me for anything I did to annoy her when she was feeling shitty, which was a lot of the time. So basically I was getting religious guilt from 6 years of awana (cause my parents were chill christians, awana tho...) and guilt from her.
    And it killed me that every time I would apologize for accidentally doing things, that she was always made to be the victim of my supposed malevolent torturing of her and that no matter how hard I tried to cater to her, it would never be enough and she would always find some way that I was a horrible inconsiderate person, and, quote, "Why don’t you think of others for a change" (while she would make me cry for a half hour about slightly annoying her by being a kid and downstairs)
    I was deep in christianity at that point, and it kinda kept me in the cycle of "put others before yourself" and was really depressed because clearly if I'm ruining her life unknowingly simply by existing around her, that surely wouldn't be an isolated thing and I should stay away from everyone else so I don't ruin their lives either. Dark times. Luckily I realized that was bullshit towards the end.
    Anyway when she finally left I was like "ok I don't want that kind of abuse again" and then, since I had thrown myself into reading the bible and going to awana (which I had done for 6 years), then the pieces slowly started to click about how similar the mindsets were between the things, the whole "you'll never be good enough, you need me" and "you caused this mess, which I kinda just put on you and blamed you for" (I mean seriously, adam and eve sinning when they had no concept of good or bad yet so they could not have even conceived of the idea that the snake would be lying cause they'd not even know what lying was, and then god being like welp i cant do anything too bad you're going to hell now).
    Point is, while it was very wrong what I was put through and how it affected me, it was the start of my deconstruction, so silver lining I guess lol. Oh also I finally realized Im bi.

  • @maizystar666
    @maizystar666 2 года назад +16

    I'm starting to believe that religion is down right un-healthy. Especially to those with religious delusions. If there must be religion, can we please do it in a healthy and humane way?

  • @maryracine3389
    @maryracine3389 2 года назад +12

    Just the idea of “original blessing” as opposed to “original sin” makes me feel accepted and loved. 😃🥰

  • @Linweezy
    @Linweezy Год назад +3

    My religious christian mom would always tell me, "you're lucky to grow up with christian parents, you have no idea how badly growing up in a non-christian home is". She would say that even though my dad would beat me and my older sister growing, drag us up the stairs by our hair, chunks falling out in the shower. Us being blamed for "not getting along" as to why my dad would hit us. Then my older sister starting hitting me, sent me to the ER, the nurse almost called the cops. My mom finally tried to get my sister and I into therapy, yet I was the only one that went in the entire family. My mom finally admitted when I was 31 my dad was secretly having a whisky problem back then and gave a small apology about being emotionally unavailable. The gaslighting, guilt and manipulation of my parents was unbelievable -- always making me feel like we weren't christian enough and didn't pray hard enough. They were never the problem. And yes, when my dad had his secret drinking problem I remember my mom bragging about them not having alcohol in the house and being "above drinking" and telling my sister and I how lucky we were because of that. Lies after lies.
    We went to church every Sunday. People thought our family was the perfect Christian family when everyday I was wishing I would be hit by a car and die since I was worried killing myself would land me in hell. Even after her small apology, my mom tells me to "forgive and get over it". She wishes! Christian's love sweeping any and all issues under the rug. She still judges others and acts like she is without sin, like she didn't mess my sister and I up beyond repair. I have social anxiety and insecurities to this day, but am finally learning to be happy because I met my husband who taught me I mattered. I am no longer being brainwashed every Sunday to hate myself and no longer practice, I am thankful I am alive and out of that terrible mess of a religion today.

  • @frozenraspberries1552
    @frozenraspberries1552 2 года назад +36

    I don't know if you already have a video about this, but can you talk about how traumatic it is being taught about the book of Revelation and the Apocalyptic indoctrination we got? I know for me it was one of the things that had me in fear from such a young age
    I also think being taught to believe in demons is an interesting one, my religion didn't hyperfocus on it, but it was talked about how Horror movies and such could invite them in

    • @frozenraspberries1552
      @frozenraspberries1552 2 года назад +8

      @@sharefortunes166 Yes! I would have nightmares about it! My church would focus on salvation for ourselves and trying to evangelize to others, but then would randomly throw in " remember Jesus is coming like a thief in the night. Oh by the way there's actually two unforgivable sins despite what we teach you twice a week, lolololol"
      It would just hit me out of nowhere and I was like. Oh yeah, I might not get to accomplish my dreams, I hope the world doesn't end before I grow up. What if I'm not good enough? Am I going to suffer at the end of the world or will I be saved from it?
      It's really messed up.

    • @Zarai_Numbers
      @Zarai_Numbers 2 года назад +3

      @@frozenraspberries1552 Me too! As a child I was constantly told that the world was ending soon, and that it was never going to get better. After a while I stopped praying for change, I felt like there was no point in helping people because nothing would ever get better and we're all doomed anyway. This made me feel depressed and hopeless. As soon as I entertain the thought that God may not be real, I was filled with so much hope for the future and felt there may be a point in trying to make the world a better place after all.

    • @believestthouthis7
      @believestthouthis7 2 года назад

      God's word says that you get a blessing from reading the book of Revelation and the end of the Bible is amazingly hopeful for the true believer.
      Revelation 1:3 - Blessed is he that readeth, and they that hear the words of this prophecy, and keep those things which are written therein: for the time is at hand.
      Revelation 22:5 - And there shall be no night there; and they need no candle, neither light of the sun; for the Lord God giveth them light: and they shall reign for ever and ever.
      1 Corinthians 2:9 - But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.

    • @Corianderfish
      @Corianderfish Месяц назад

      Just saw this and omg yes, I remember I kept crying and felt really depressed and panicked for a while because i was scared that my dad, a ‘non-believer’, would forever burn it hell…. I was 12…

  • @WalldoTheWInner
    @WalldoTheWInner 2 года назад +13

    All I ever heard growing up was how self esteem was a bad thing and a bunch of "psychobabble", and now I'm an angry socially retarded loner well into my 30s. Not really an excuse, but definitely an explanation.

  • @shamra1245
    @shamra1245 Год назад +1

    I was just telling someone earlier today how I think some of the guilt and shame I struggle with are ingrained from my Catholic upbringing even thought I haven't believed in Christianity or even monotheism in quite a long time. Those ideas that even thinking a sin is sinful really got to me, especially as a perfectionist, people-pleasing child of a narcissist (or two maybe). While luckily my religious indoctrination wasn't as extreme as yours, it really did leave some of the same scars, particularly as an afab person in a severely patriarchal system. Thank you for talking about this though. While I'm not sure where to proceed quite yet in my further healing, it makes me feel a lot less alone.

  • @missk7001
    @missk7001 2 года назад +3

    A lot in my life shifted by allowing an all loving god in my life. I am without denomination but still deconstructed a lot of sin and guilt in my life. So many times on my journey when I found myself criticising, this loving god still loves me, encourages me to embrace this critical part of me that doesn’t know better. So often when I binge ate again and felt deep self hatred this all loving presence was here unconditionally and taught me self love, that I’m enough. It took me many years to realise that my own ego, which is full of judgemental criticism, IS the hell so many religions write about. And by loving my ego, by embracing this self hatred I am using my free will to grow as a human and to transform it.

  • @staceyhart9746
    @staceyhart9746 2 года назад +4

    This type of indoctrination is I think why I have chronic major depression with low self-esteem. I think my mom thought self esteem was “from the devil”

    • @alliewilliams9744
      @alliewilliams9744 Год назад +1

      Same here. I was told all of my mental health issues were some form of spiritual battle, and that I must’ve done something to invite the devil or demonic forces in

  • @naturemessages
    @naturemessages 2 года назад +2

    Surviving through strict rigid religious ideologies makes us capable of anything!

  • @theologytherapist
    @theologytherapist Год назад +1

    Really love the subjects you touched on here - I definitely notice many of the same things in my patients when we address Religious Trauma Syndrome.

  • @rebeccadejong5087
    @rebeccadejong5087 2 года назад +7

    Oh man, Donut Man and "Why" by Nicole Nordeman... you totally just transported me back to my childhood!! I also used to listen to that song over and over. Only now realizing how messed up these things were for kids to hear. Thank you for sharing and for making these videos!!

  • @taylorbatton
    @taylorbatton 3 года назад +14

    I really appreciate you and your channel. Thank you for sharing something that is a difficult topic. I also enjoy how you structure your videos. You’re a gifted speaker!

  • @robroboto
    @robroboto 2 года назад +3

    I just had the craziest flashback when you brought up donut man. I had forgotten all about that till I saw you mention it and now I can see every episode in my head.

  • @Schwaaaang
    @Schwaaaang 2 года назад +2

    I was genuinely unprepared for how triggering hearing Christianese again would be
    I thought I was ok but this is a great reminder to keep understanding my childhood
    Thank you for the excellent insights in this!

    • @MonoKyrios
      @MonoKyrios 11 месяцев назад

      I'm sorry the church hurt you, if it hurts, it's not biblical. Jesus says "my yoke is easy and my burden is light" Jesus never hurt you, his people did

  • @DinosaurFartMaster
    @DinosaurFartMaster Год назад +1

    your channel is one of my favorites on RUclips. I resonate with everything you talk about, from the abuse to awanas. you are not alone! thank you for sharing your story!

  • @raspberryitalia3464
    @raspberryitalia3464 2 года назад +4

    Omg donut man yeeted me directly into the past. I was unprepared

  • @pumpkinsandme6238
    @pumpkinsandme6238 2 года назад +11

    I was raised on Christian music. My kids are being raised on K-pop lol. I feel guilty about it.

    • @devidaughter7782
      @devidaughter7782 2 года назад +4

      maybe by acknowledging the guilt, it can release!? how wonderful to NOT be giving your children songs that will stick in their head the rest of their life, all about Jesus dying for them!

    • @bmoe4609
      @bmoe4609 2 года назад +1

      Girl u doin good. My kids will not hear gospel music. Unless they come upon it theyselves or with grandma. Unfortunately my mom would sneak it in the teachings of god to my kids. I would teach them early on, love yourself, your great n beautiful already, there right n wrong, no god out there. Live your life in whatever u choose

  • @Jasminejupiterjuice
    @Jasminejupiterjuice 3 месяца назад

    Ive never heard that song before. Intense! & relateable.

  • @mogiebridgette9115
    @mogiebridgette9115 Год назад +1

    The song Why is used in our Easter Play but why. I remember getting the conversation that all of my thoughts are being filtered out to god. Which sometimes made me feel bad

  • @habibti320
    @habibti320 2 года назад +3

    Omg the donut man and psalty were my childhood! Thanks for covering all these topics that help me feel seen

  • @sandovalbre
    @sandovalbre 2 года назад +3

    Yes, you are worthy, for just breathing…
    That’s what I’ve always told my daughters. (Youngest is 21y/o)

  • @caterpillar5071
    @caterpillar5071 2 года назад +1

    I do struggle with guilt a lot as an emotion. I don’t seem to be able to deal with it constructively. Recently talked to a counsellor about self forgiveness and realised that I had a totally different view of forgiveness from christianity than what was really practical. The forgiveness of Jesus was that ‘your sin is immeasurably great but I have undone it by my sacrifice’. This definition of forgiveness makes it impossible to forgive yourself for a wrong, as you need the wronged person (and Jesus’s sacrifice) to exempt you from it. Otherwise your sin is irredeemably great (even if it’s really quite small . . .) But practical forgiveness of yourself and between people usually involves ‘I don’t agree with what they did but I can understand that we all have flaws and different places we are coming from, different ways of seeing things, so I can accept and move on’.

  • @natasharostova6067
    @natasharostova6067 2 года назад +4

    I thought that Donut Man was a fever dream😳

  • @643lmer
    @643lmer 2 года назад +2

    Thank you for your videos!! I'm so happy to finally be comfortable calling myself an ex-fundie and your videos have played a vital part in my journey.

  • @keithrobertwells9605
    @keithrobertwells9605 2 года назад +3

    excellent video… keep on making them.

  • @plumsparkles945
    @plumsparkles945 2 года назад +1

    So proud of you!

  • @Ircy2012
    @Ircy2012 2 года назад +11

    Me when I was still christian: I know people keep saying we're servants but I can't shake off the feeling that it feels like slavery. After all god treats us like property and we can't really say no without being punished in an immeasurably horrific way.
    You when you were a christian: .. I must fight the great fight as a servant, a bond slave of you ...
    Well, "at least" your form of christianity was honest about it. So much more extreme and damaging though. :(

  • @user-ld6th3vw8e
    @user-ld6th3vw8e 2 года назад

    thank you so much for sharing this. it must take so much to be brave about this stuff( I know this was two years ago but still)

  • @michaelodonnell824
    @michaelodonnell824 Год назад

    There's a Hymn / Christmas Carol "Once in Royal David's City which portrays the infant Jesus as ALWAYS Good and compares the rest of us unfavourably to him "Christian children all must be
    Mild, Obedient, good as he".
    This isn't just an impossible standard for the rest of us, it is a VERY dangerous theology that imagines that, even as an infant, Jesus is ALWAYS the Stoic, submissive God.
    Yet, even the Gospels tell us that, when told his mother and brothers are outside, Jesus answered "Who are my Mother and Brothers"? Somewhere Mr Submissive became Mr Superior...

  • @maryracine3389
    @maryracine3389 2 года назад +1

    Read the book, “Original Blessing.”

  • @wondrousinquiry
    @wondrousinquiry 2 года назад +8

    catch me putting on your videos every time i start having The Bad Thoughts so they go away

  • @oliviadawes3345
    @oliviadawes3345 3 месяца назад

    I feel like growing up, I always tried to shift the blame regarding Jesus’ crucifixion by thinking, well, it wasn’t JUST for me… it was for everybody! It’s not just MY fault. Lol

  • @kott7209
    @kott7209 8 месяцев назад

    It's sad how a lot of Christian teachings force you to read the Bible or force their religions on you, and make you feel like a worthless little creature. In a School we used to go to there were like chapel gatherings of them just talking about God saying how good he is and singing Christian songs. I remember that in one of the songs in the song people were basically called "sheep who follow him". I'm sorry you had to go through that!

  • @not_you_i_dont_even_know_you
    @not_you_i_dont_even_know_you 2 года назад +2

    Wow wow wow I really repressed memories of donut man 😂😐

  • @janeline4936
    @janeline4936 2 года назад +1

    The way she described her faith before is leaning calvinism where total depravity is true and there's always an emphasis on being worms. I'm still a Christian but no longer a Calvinist. Try to listen to Dr. Leighton Flowers as provisionist. We were created in the beautiful image of God hence I don't believe in total depravity of man. I believe God made us in His image meaning with intellect, ability to choose and having emotions.

  • @kylekeiper4514
    @kylekeiper4514 2 года назад +6

    I just want to point out quick on #2 that I find it fascinating that (in my experience), the people quick to tell you that we caused Jesus' death are usually the same to say that since we don't personally participate in slavery, reparations aren't necessary.

  • @lahainke
    @lahainke 2 года назад +7

    I used to feel so guilty too, all of the time, but that was “before” finding Christ. I think it’s because I was only raised on morals and on nothing on Christ’s. But I don’t struggle with all the guilt pain. He washed me clean. He also makes me feel so much more confidence within myself. I feel I’m turning into a strong woman, because of Him. I don’t know what I’d do without His Word.

    • @rh10033
      @rh10033 2 года назад +3

      Amen! This is what happens when you just have rules, tradition, and religion without an actual relationship with Jesus. There is absolutely nothing anyone could do or say for me not to believe in Christ because I've actually experienced Him working in my life like actual miracles, not just feelings.
      I feel so bad for these kids who grew up in empty religion, no true conviction of the Holy Spirt (just a guilty conscience) or realizing how much God really loves them. God is not waiting to strike you with a lightning bolt. He already took the weight of all of our sin. He has washed away our sins and sees Christ now when he looks at Christians.
      I think one of the biggest issues that many people have with coming to Christ is admitting the weight of their sin. People just cannot face the reality of how depraved we all are. It makes them uncomfortable and feel guilty so they run in the opposite direction instead of into God's arms. I can relate to that, but at the end of the day, truth is truth no matter how you feel about it. People are born prone to lying, stealing, cheating, etc. It absolutely is the human condition and Jesus is the only cure.

    • @lahainke
      @lahainke 2 года назад +1

      @@rh10033 Well said!

    • @LpsDreamsStarsandMoons
      @LpsDreamsStarsandMoons 2 года назад +3

      @@rh10033 I grew up christian but I always felt that if I was imperfect God would hate me. But since my recent years (I am now 19) God is so much more kinder than what I feard him to be. He is just and right, and I do fear him, but not at the extent I did as a preteen. Alot of culty christian groups kinda made me feel persicutory. So I started to become a nondinominal christan and not go to church. Best desicion I made in my life, and I am closer to God and Jesus.

    • @MonoKyrios
      @MonoKyrios 11 месяцев назад

      Amen!

  • @MybridWonderful
    @MybridWonderful 2 года назад +3

    Good job video editing. Well met. Just wanted to say that. Also, keep making the videos. I never de-converted because I'm immune to the religious BS and the brain-washing foisted upon me during my childhood. I could care less. It is interesting to pounder why most people are susceptible and a few of us are not. Evolution made us social animals and thus socially programmable. And yet some of us are immune. Anyway, given the majority are then it is imperative that these kinds of videos be made to support others. It is not a character flaw to be social, it is our nature so don't feel bad about being susceptible to social programming at any age.

  • @lahainke
    @lahainke 2 года назад +1

    You are a wonderful lady. You are confident in yourself (for doing RUclips!). You come across strong, no matter how hard your life has been! You can find enjoyment, as it sounds you are finding. I’m very proud of you. I’m sure you are sharing others what you’ve been through will help many others! And may I also add, you are a beautiful woman. You are WORTH a lot. God wonderfully made You! You can, as you are, have a wonderful life without Christ! I’m fact, life with Christ can be harder! But I’m willing to take that path. I look forward to live with Him in heaven, when all of that pain is gone.

  • @HS-tm4xe
    @HS-tm4xe 2 года назад

    Just my thoughts, but if you get a chance, look up Andrew Farley or Mark DeJesus.

  • @pesto.supremacy1525
    @pesto.supremacy1525 2 года назад +1

    NOT THE DONUT MAN GET OUT OF HERE

  • @kt68866
    @kt68866 2 года назад

    The major story the bible is about how the ultimate perfect being had to let his child come away from him, and face danger and pain and suffering, and die young.
    In the case where we ignore the aprocrypha, jesus was perfect, and its basically all a bunch of mystical nonsense, in my honest opinion. The moral is "god gave his son to die for you, so give your sons to die for him or else"
    But that why song got me thinking.
    Jesus never says hes god. He says hes the son of god. He implies that hes special offhand, but he never makes any claims.
    I still kind of consider myself christian, really, just metaphorically.
    But i believe that we are all being pulled to make things a way we think is good and happy (heavenly, if you will). I believe that if we pay more attention to the feelings and instincts that we have, by design, to navigate and survive (dare i call it the holy spirit?) than to how the world tells us we should feel and react (christians say its secular society but id argue that its literally everyone who isnt you personally), that the world will be pulled towards being better for everyone. To the point where we could create a perfect utopia that we could literally live forever in if thats what we wanted (tell me science cant do it, go ahead).
    And i think the people who wrote the bible had some idea of that, but then they did what everyone does. "AND HERE IS EXACTLY THE BEST WAY TO MAKE SURE EVERYONE DOES THE BEST THING FOR THEM BECAUSE EVERYONE WILL FIND IT THE EXACT SAME WAY"
    This is really lengthy, but i think understanding that belief is necessary to understanding what this Why song has brought to light for me. It makes the point of jesus, apocrypha inclusive, feel a lot more like "teach your kids the best you can, but theyre different than you, and they need to do what they need to do, even if they get die and it hurts. Because that sacrifice in your eyes will make life better for everyone. And i know that sounds weird, but this is how it works, trust me, yeah yeah, sky daddy told me, its cool" than "god came down in an avatar body so we wouldnt have to kill sheep anymore to get into heaven so now we have to keep doing exactly whatever he wants or we still wont get into heaven"
    Idk one of those sounds stupid and pointless to me and one doesnt but thats just my opinion

  • @bybeta9885
    @bybeta9885 2 года назад +2

    While making children traumatized because of lack of wisdom to know how to properly reveal and teach them the Bible, is bad, most Christians in today’s world have the audacity to believe they are the Center of the universe. You are all grown up now, realize the mistakes your parents and others have done in your lives as children, and move on. The Bible IS THE TRUTH! Everything is For the Glory of GOD!

  • @Drooblemeister
    @Drooblemeister Год назад +1

    I’m sorry to hear your experience was negative, my experience to this day now in my adult years is that I know God is more real than the air I breathe and without His love I feel I would have been in breakdown mode many times over! The theme I’m hearing in your video is GUILT! Sin is NOT the gospel, it’s freedom from sin and freedom from guilt that is so I’m sorry you only got the bad stuff. Romans 8:1 says ‘Therefore, there is now NO CONDEMNATION for those who are in Christ!’ The true Christian life is not supposed to be sad and petty, but joyful and abundant! ‘I have come that they might have life and life to the fullest!’ It sounds like you grew up with a performance, rule-based Christianity where no matter what you do it’s not enough, God will never completely accept you as you are, you will always come up short. The biblical Christianity is one where the Father loves us, sings over us, holds us closely to his heart and embraces us not as sinners, but as His sons and daughters! He remembers our sins no more and removes them as far as the east is from the west! Now that is liberating!

  • @childinchrist7335
    @childinchrist7335 3 года назад +8

    I am a Christian. I am sorry that the theology you learnt made you feel oppressed. You said that thinking about Jesus death made you feel like you were evil and you felt unsure of whether you had enough faith or was diligent enough, or believed the right way and you feared that you would go to Hell for not living in obedience to God in the exact way you imagine someone would after accepting Christ.
    And that made me sad, because the way I relate to Christ's death for me, is different. I do believe that in viewing the cross, it does reveal how sinful I am but it also reveals how God loves me regardless of my sinfulness. And I understand that many people may not like that. (The Christian idea of love) because we don't believe that God loves us because we are a worthy of His Love. BUT we believe that He loves because that's *who He is*. And so He loves us despite of our sinfulness.
    And this may make people feel like they are imperfect but that is the truth (we are imperfect.) And that what makes Christ's love inviting (at least to me). I feel joy because He loves us regardless.
    And that is another thing. In the video you talk about a song from your childhood where the person narrated a conversation between God the Father saying to the Son," I do not want to do this but I have to do this."
    And i think that is really bad theology because God the Father desired that his Son would be the sacrifice for sin and the Son likewise desired to be the sacrifice for sin. It was both of their desire. Salvation was in the mind of God before the foundation of the world was even laid.
    Anyways, I am sorry that you feel that way. And I believe it is a burden for someone to believe something about God that makes them feel like they have to earn his Love. The whole point of Christianity is God: His Love, His Forgiveness, His Sacrifice, His promises, His Grace and His Justice. The gospel (good news) is not make you feel burdened to meet God's standard because we can never but, to rejoice because though we can never, God in His great love, did everything for us. And when we trust that, He saves us completely.

    • @JuliaAllenHesse
      @JuliaAllenHesse 3 года назад +5

      Does God extend this "love" to those who are LGBTQ+?

    • @childinchrist7335
      @childinchrist7335 3 года назад +2

      @@JuliaAllenHesse yes ofcourse. He loves all sinners.

    • @MountainPearls
      @MountainPearls 3 года назад +6

      @@JuliaAllenHesse In my church we have a Transgender Deacon (Episcopalians). We affirm her story and her gender! We believe she IS A WOMAN. We believe God makes us who we are emotionally-the sex is Science. I don’t particularly believe God has a sex/gender. Or perhaps THEY are both? Or all of them that we aren’t aware of (yet)? Or rather, that your identity is in God and the SEX is yiht biology. God doesn’t make mistakes...with our identities. Biology is just how it’s done. If you lead with your heart, as Christians should do, you are leading with Love and God is Love. I personally don’t think Jesus HAD to die! Many of us believe, like so many other Political Dissidents and those who are Leader of Radical Movemnet for So with Change! However, he died and came back as a way to say: yeah, you can’t stop god, yoh can’t kill love, snd you won’t win because I DIDNT stay dead! I tod to show others that so many evil people out there who desire money, and power, over love (which is what God is) can’t win in the end! And that vein for God is to LOVE (in every single way one can love)!!! It’s not always easy to love your enemies though, especially recently! That’s the part I have a hard time with! Not the Faith part! BTW...in 1946 “S3xual Devianct” was replaced by words that mean “Gay!” (Or any other form of LGBTQ. Also, the only thing we are supposed to keep from the Old Testament, is the Ten Commandments. Otherwise, Corinthians (that was changed just after WWII) is the only place in the Nee Testament that mentions anything about anything other than sexuality. So yes, God loves you, and doesn’t view your LGBTQ+ identity as a sin!!! I literally Thank God that I was raised in the Love of Christ (and not fear)! And as a Progressive Christian who was taught (in Sunday School things about Social Justice-because Christ was an SJW) and that the Bible was fallible (on the 900s some Poor decided that Mary Magdalene should be a wh*re). Snd also that “love the dinner and hate the sin” (when it comes to LGBTQ people) is BS! The real sons are the things in the Ten Commandments (adultery, murder etc). In the New Testament it come down to Loving God (so loving Love) snd lovin GB to her neighbor (while putting yourself in their shoes as best you can). So yes, you are loved because you are YOU! Period. Also, every thing is secondary to what Christ has to say! It is just people (many who knew him) commentary on it! So, if you want to focus on that...just read Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John (and also much of The Apocraoha (many books that a bunch of old men with agenda’s just to decided to write out of The Bible). Also look into The Gnostic Gisoels (it has writing by women who knew Jesus, too).

    • @JuliaAllenHesse
      @JuliaAllenHesse 3 года назад +1

      @@childinchrist7335 So you're okay with LGBTQ+ people fully participating in church? Like Hillary's church? Being a deacon? Pastor? Usher? Worship leader?

    • @fogweaver5633
      @fogweaver5633 2 года назад +21

      "I'm sorry you feel that way" means "I'm right, you're wrong." So very loving. "I'll pray for you" is the most vile threat that has ever been directed at me. So you don't have religious trauma. Good for you. We do. You are just adding to it.

  • @Bricktown982
    @Bricktown982 2 года назад +1

    I'm trying to watch your video but you need to be careful not to blaspheme the name of Jesus. I do not at all like how you read your prayer in a lousy irritated way. Jesus deserves more respect than that. His sacrifice is the most important thing. The words in your prayer were beautiful and heartfelt.
    I can relate with the feeling of constant anxiety and unworthiness which I am slowly finding is unnecessary. I have to forgive me, and accept me. Then do the best I can.

    • @hellepost1439
      @hellepost1439 2 года назад +2

      “If I could stop a person from raping a child, I would. That’s the difference between me and your God.” Tracie Harris❣️❣️❣️❣️

    • @KateeAngel
      @KateeAngel 2 года назад +1

      "blaspeme"
      We don't speak your theocratic language here, goodbye

    • @hannahbrennan2131
      @hannahbrennan2131 2 года назад +2

      Blaspheme? Seriously? What is this? The fucking Spanish Inquisition?

    • @youtuber-rh1eg
      @youtuber-rh1eg 2 года назад +2

      she's not blasphemous she's sharing her story and spreading awareness of the people who use religion to hurt and control people

    • @bmoe4609
      @bmoe4609 2 года назад +1

      @Lauren Davis it a form of control frrl. Like why are u on this video if u believe sooo much. Your gonna be upset cuz it not what u wanna hear. Lol like telling people how to live