Signs you're scared of commitment

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  • Опубликовано: 13 июл 2024
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    produced by Amber Grace
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    grip - Melissa Gasca, John Lee
    sound - John Lee
    gfx by Bethany Radloff
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Комментарии • 1,1 тыс.

  • @priyanujbordoloi9071
    @priyanujbordoloi9071 4 года назад +4506

    Fun fact: Oranges are pre-sliced by nature

    • @NoraVonYT
      @NoraVonYT 4 года назад +48

      Priyanuj Bordoloi how considerate of it ❤️ 🍊

    • @ahnrho
      @ahnrho 4 года назад +16

      Damn.

    • @Jobe-13
      @Jobe-13 4 года назад +1

      Priyanuj Bordoloi yup

    • @xFlared
      @xFlared 4 года назад +6

      Fun fact: I'm about to slap you.

    • @AngelH
      @AngelH 4 года назад +9

      Fun fact: Mandarins are oranges pre-sliced by nature

  • @WrathOfGrapesN7
    @WrathOfGrapesN7 4 года назад +2394

    "Get a life."
    "Make one with me, coward."
    Hilarious.

  • @4289isOK
    @4289isOK 4 года назад +5617

    Fun fact: Not all facts are fun.

    • @andrewrose8535
      @andrewrose8535 4 года назад +48

      Say sike right now.

    • @johanlindenhann254
      @johanlindenhann254 4 года назад +10

      Oh yeah, we just call them facts

    • @WingSlash
      @WingSlash 4 года назад +1

      Thank you, Mr. Bastion "Posh Sh*thead" Misawa. Truly, your insights are among the poshest & the sh*test out there. We salute you, sir.

    • @4289isOK
      @4289isOK 4 года назад

      WingSlash I blame Martin for this. -_-

    • @WingSlash
      @WingSlash 4 года назад

      @@4289isOK
      You are right to do so, good sir. :P

  • @toodaloo484
    @toodaloo484 4 года назад +1069

    "get a life"
    " *make one with me coward* "

  • @corkydukeII5898
    @corkydukeII5898 4 года назад +2559

    "Enjoying the pursuit of a relationship rather than actually being in one". Yep, that's me for sure...and probably alot of others too : D

  • @dangermenatwork
    @dangermenatwork 4 года назад +812

    this channel should be named Anna Attacka based on how much your recent content attacks me and forces me to face my issues thanks babe

  • @tamarlambert6121
    @tamarlambert6121 4 года назад +946

    "You still feel scared from a previous relationship, and you carry those beliefs into the now. You are convinced, most likely subconsciously, that any future partner will hurt you as your past one did, and as a result, you keep everyone at arms length"
    Fun fact:.......... that one wasn't fun

    • @andrealewis2501
      @andrealewis2501 4 года назад +19

      I almost think a guy did this to me. We talked for hours on the phone, then he insisted we meet up after that I almost didn't want to see him a third time but he persuaded me. Then not to long after he made it clear he was uninterested but he still tried to get me to want him, he had been hurt in past relationships, I think the one woman left him and he was super attracted to me, but out of the 8 traits he was looking for i didn't have 3 and it seemed very nitpicky, to me anyway. We had everything in common, we could talk for hours and yet he was attracted to me, but he would find reasons that it wouldn't work and instead of trying to work through those had a that's the end all be all attitude.

    • @teresa_meow
      @teresa_meow 4 года назад +2

      I felt attacked by that one. 😓

    • @Ntx_MrE
      @Ntx_MrE 4 года назад +1

      Not fun, but definitely a fact

    • @tamarlambert6121
      @tamarlambert6121 4 года назад +2

      @Teddy James wat?

    • @tamarlambert6121
      @tamarlambert6121 4 года назад +3

      @Teddy James what do you mean a crime? Lol. "damn I hate being single. Lemme go commit tax fraud" lol

  • @bugra9700
    @bugra9700 4 года назад +698

    Yeah, I guess my relationship goes good.
    20secs later, Anna: YOU ARE AFRAID OF COMMITMENT

  • @macadamia668
    @macadamia668 Год назад +65

    Reasons why I'm afraid of commitment?
    1. Possessiveness/Controlling People
    2. Afraid of hurting or being hurt
    3. Despise disappointing people
    4. Don't like being counted or dependent on
    5. Don't believe in promises
    6. Value personal freedom above anything else.
    Yeah, I think its safe to say I'll be single forever.

    • @TheResistance8969
      @TheResistance8969 Год назад +4

      Then you're not alone girl, same here

    • @Spacegeezer
      @Spacegeezer Год назад

      I Don’t believe in promises.. and I wish all people could think that way

  • @goldenknight1756
    @goldenknight1756 4 года назад +2023

    Fun fact: We all are gonna die c:
    Anna: *Smiles in death* That makes me happy :)

    • @trinitrojack
      @trinitrojack 4 года назад +5

      The funnest of facts

    • @Chronorust
      @Chronorust 3 года назад +1

      That's what makes everything totally less worrisome and serious.
      HOW is what I'm more worried of lol

  • @duchi882
    @duchi882 4 года назад +705

    Sign you're scared of Commitment:
    1. You're still Single

  • @FF2Guy
    @FF2Guy 4 года назад +362

    "You're very interested...until they are" sounds like every girl I've ever met

  • @giapratt1543
    @giapratt1543 4 года назад +378

    "Commitment is not something that I fear, but something that I welcome. "
    That's my 2020 vision a.k.a goal right there.
    Thanks Anna 🖤

  • @reyamathur2146
    @reyamathur2146 4 года назад +547

    Fun fact: I'm Chandler Bing in a relationship

  • @ghadirabdullah5374
    @ghadirabdullah5374 4 года назад +152

    Dude I’m AFRAID of being in a relationship

  • @AB_Archives
    @AB_Archives 4 года назад +132

    Fun fact: Anna is smart because therapy is most likely business expense, better use it on therapy sessions rather than being taxed on

  • @Geminias
    @Geminias 3 года назад +43

    "I don't know if love is real" - I feel this in my soul.

  • @LashanR
    @LashanR 4 года назад +122

    2:07 When she started getting into the smaller, more subtle signs it felt like she was repeatedly bashing me over the head with the book she recommended.

  • @gurudra
    @gurudra 4 года назад +95

    Life begins where fear ends

    • @MiguelRPD
      @MiguelRPD 4 года назад +1

      And what if it kills you ?

  • @Jordan-vc4cn
    @Jordan-vc4cn 4 года назад +19

    Okay, so we all know Anna is the queen of introspection here, but can we also talk about how amazing her comedic chops are? That "arm's length" callback alone was pacing, planning, and relevance to the main topic freaking perfected. It's a privilege to watch such top tier content.

  • @Darryl_xtx
    @Darryl_xtx 4 года назад +46

    “Some of you might feel attack”
    Me: yes but needed

  • @HRHCaleb
    @HRHCaleb 4 года назад +36

    "Get a life!... make one with me coward..." what a great line

  • @goldenknight1756
    @goldenknight1756 4 года назад +253

    *I can’t forget seeing you in Ant-Man o-o*

  • @Kasstato
    @Kasstato 4 года назад +21

    I already know this about myself. My first relationship wasnt good or healthy. So when i first started dating my boyfriend i really notices how nitpicky i was like "the right person should just feel *right*" but like. I have anxiety and trust issues face it its never going to feel right until you push yourself out of your comfort zone and give your partner that little bit of trust until one day it does feel right. It feels like i can trust them finally because i pushed myself to trust

  • @rmdcade1717
    @rmdcade1717 4 года назад +38

    "Fun fact: you're 2.6 feet away from me" got me. The perfect timing on the callback

  • @april-kn2vr
    @april-kn2vr 4 года назад +5

    i knew i was going to be called out but i wasn’t prepared to be so accurately called out

  • @veemai8115
    @veemai8115 4 года назад +213

    fun facts: anna loves to attack individuals like me with videos like these 😔🤲

  • @theanikakyngshow
    @theanikakyngshow 4 года назад +10

    It’s crazy how the signs told me how I’m pursuing commitment so hard that I’m actually not allowing myself to be committed because of this underlying fear of it?! Yk? Thanks for this Anna, hope that made sense cuz this made a lot of sense to me now.

  • @cheyennewotherspoon1087
    @cheyennewotherspoon1087 4 года назад +129

    I feel so attacked. 😂😂

  • @johnathangulley9700
    @johnathangulley9700 4 года назад +40

    You know how everyone has their own definition for love? I made one that combines a few; tell me what you think.
    Love:
    A pleasing desire of acceptance, regardless of flaws, to commit to care and/or help with a feeling of deep affection.

    • @quillettt
      @quillettt 3 года назад +1

      seems pretty accurate to me your definition.

    • @fedoramcclaren4294
      @fedoramcclaren4294 2 года назад +1

      ...this sounds like how I would define unconditional love...

    • @r011ing_thunder6
      @r011ing_thunder6 2 года назад

      Soon as I read desire I stopped reading

    • @r011ing_thunder6
      @r011ing_thunder6 2 года назад

      @@johnathangulley9700 I think your attracted to disapproval if I’m the one comment you responded to

    • @r011ing_thunder6
      @r011ing_thunder6 2 года назад +1

      @@johnathangulley9700 hmm okay 👍

  • @bebemoh6782
    @bebemoh6782 4 года назад +13

    I knew i had commitment issues since i stopped finishing any game or series

  • @foodsafetypragmatist
    @foodsafetypragmatist 4 года назад +15

    Great book! 👍🏼
    Used to be anxiously attached. Securely attached now. Took time & a lot of work. You’ll have setbacks so be gracious & forgiving to yourself. You’ll get there - I know it!

  • @sophia1851
    @sophia1851 4 года назад +4

    when they abandon you n you’re sad but also relieved...

  • @alexa9364
    @alexa9364 4 года назад +67

    Since Anna uses clones. Does that mean she's dating herself? If so? How many clones are there?😂

  • @no-one0425
    @no-one0425 4 года назад +125

    Fun fact: we're all going to die

    • @amihere383
      @amihere383 4 года назад

      @first last Than, not then

    • @quillettt
      @quillettt 3 года назад

      that's not a fun fact.

    • @daverhoden445
      @daverhoden445 3 года назад

      Ahhh, but if you die before me then how do you know I'll die? :D

  • @vedikakulkarni5094
    @vedikakulkarni5094 4 года назад +5

    I recently started therapy for anxiety and low self-esteem because your videos are one of the reason that made me okay with it.

  • @sandra98facebook
    @sandra98facebook 4 года назад +4

    "You are very interestend...until they are" ouch that one really hurt

  • @micheller2368
    @micheller2368 4 года назад +12

    The mustard yellow has been lookin’ goooooooood btw, lol.

  • @spinthatmetalfreak
    @spinthatmetalfreak 4 года назад +50

    Sign youre afraid of commitment: You watched this
    ugh I love being attacked by Anna

  • @Memekyu
    @Memekyu 4 года назад +80

    Fun Fact: We're all gonna die.
    That needs to be a t-shirt!

    • @erhantufekcoglu3193
      @erhantufekcoglu3193 4 года назад +5

      I Will make that tshirt. İn several colors! 😂😉

    • @Memekyu
      @Memekyu 4 года назад +1

      @@erhantufekcoglu3193 There needs to be more people like you 😊👍👍

  • @DreamBelive07
    @DreamBelive07 4 года назад +25

    okay.......but you didnt have to drag me this hard

  • @forbiddenyt9318
    @forbiddenyt9318 4 года назад +16

    “ We’re all gonna die”
    I’m excited 🤩🤩🤩...

  • @MelissaNgai
    @MelissaNgai 4 года назад +1

    Anna's constant creative and helpful videos really make me feel motivated to live life. It's just fun to see her always creating and trying to give and analyze and in turn, help herself by talking out all these thoughts.

  • @mykittiespuppy1972
    @mykittiespuppy1972 4 года назад +54

    Fun fact: "If I measured pants using my neck I'd never get them over my thighs."

  • @papernecklace
    @papernecklace 4 года назад +4

    This topic was really relatable for me, I always destroy the thing that just started and then proceed to blame the other party and eventually myself. And then start this cycle over. Thank you for sharing!

  • @freyab5066
    @freyab5066 4 года назад +3

    attachment styles are so so so important for undoing that deep childhood trauma stuff i love/hate doing the necessary work that it uncovers.... schema therapy is a really fun and different perspective that helped me once i realised i’d learnt all i could from cognitive behavioural therapy and i still wasn’t healthy !!

  • @melaniekay6745
    @melaniekay6745 4 года назад

    Giiiiirrrrl! I just saw you on A Million Little Things!!! Already one of my favorite shows, now with one of my favorite RUclips Influencers! You rock, hon! So happy for you! 😊❤

  • @theluckyone7189
    @theluckyone7189 4 года назад

    seriously have no idea why i've been dweliing on all of your videos for a week now. Those messages you gave in the videos are no joke. Thanks for making everyon better and life's easier, Anna.

  • @Princ3lei
    @Princ3lei 4 года назад +68

    “You think your married friends settled” lmao no I know this for a fact SO BOOM. 💀😂 I’ll commit when I feel like I’ve gotten my best option ☺️

    • @sophiemay9645
      @sophiemay9645 4 года назад

      but what if that's never 🤔

    • @Princ3lei
      @Princ3lei 4 года назад +1

      Sophie May lol! I don’t have those issues/concerns. But hypothetically, I would just never commit.

  • @andreavalencie
    @andreavalencie 4 года назад +143

    Anna be helping psychology students from her own findings
    That's me! Thanks Anna💕

    • @anjuma.x
      @anjuma.x 4 года назад +1

      Andrea Valencie that’s me too! But I’m doing it as an A Level

  • @Nbengil
    @Nbengil 3 года назад

    I seriously love your sense of humor mixed with your honestly and feel like I can relate so much. Thank you

  • @leenanorms
    @leenanorms 4 года назад +1

    Anna this was fab, thank you!

  • @mr.colemak404
    @mr.colemak404 4 года назад +9

    Love how when she started getting real her voice became more nasal. 😂

  • @katcuzzi
    @katcuzzi 3 года назад +4

    I was today years old when I learned that I’m scared of commitment.

  • @mwloos1
    @mwloos1 2 года назад +2

    This is a huge issue in the world right now. Thanks for sharing. I think another contributing factor is there is so much access to choice as well with social media, multiple dating apps, etc…

  • @3rdStExperiment
    @3rdStExperiment 3 года назад +2

    She deserves so many more subs. Intelligent, gorgeous and entertaining.

  • @ErikaK
    @ErikaK 4 года назад +21

    letting go of the stories we tell ourselves, understand our limiting beliefs and understand ourselves better, building a relationship with ourselves first!!!

  • @hollow.skull.95
    @hollow.skull.95 4 года назад +4

    I knew I am. Afraid of commitment. I relate more or less to some of these signs, but I wasn't aware it was so bad. At around 2:26 (also from 2:44 to 2:49)... Anna got me good, that's an "attack" on me because it's so true (no matter how much I deny it and try to lie to myself). Thanks for the book rec. I'll try to help myself with it until I finally get the nerve to go to an actual therapist.

  • @Dripxo
    @Dripxo 4 года назад +2

    I don’t know if I’ve ever felt more personally attacked before.

  • @artrockerispunkd
    @artrockerispunkd 4 года назад +1

    A friend and I discovered we both watch you, and agreed that your videos are like free therapy sessions.
    Stay Awesome Anna! ♡

  • @primolla4609
    @primolla4609 4 года назад +4

    Not just a afraid of intimacy girl
    I'ma scared of commitment too

  • @blueraine8705
    @blueraine8705 4 года назад +8

    "Get a life."
    "Make one with me, you coward."
    👌👀👅👌👌👀💯

  • @bdstudios6088
    @bdstudios6088 2 года назад

    I actually love Anna’s videos

  • @vivianxwei
    @vivianxwei 4 года назад +2

    Going through something like this in my head but in the peak of a long term relationship. Thanks for this Anna, definitely need to do some more conscious work on my subconscious.

  • @kenna163
    @kenna163 4 года назад +21

    I'm not scared of commiting. I've commited to this channel.

  • @engineer15426378
    @engineer15426378 4 года назад +3

    "Make one with me, coward." Just gold!

  • @chebaca8
    @chebaca8 Год назад

    Sometimes and I mean ALL the time, I feel like Anna is speaking directly to me

  • @uWuqt
    @uWuqt 4 года назад

    You and everyone working to build this channel are awesome.

  • @anulekhaprasad5307
    @anulekhaprasad5307 4 года назад +3

    Oh my god this outlines my entire existence

  • @andiisaur
    @andiisaur 4 года назад +5

    I'm not afraid of relationships, I was in a commited relationship for 10 years... Now I miss being in one so much, having that special partner that you can tell everything and hang up and make love. Lol

  • @kdvwusm
    @kdvwusm 8 месяцев назад +1

    I am TERRIFIED to get hurt by someone I genuinely trust and love. It’s so bad I rather leave first because in my mind they will leave eventually. They will hurt me. That pain I felt before was horrible.

  • @GlaizaJournals
    @GlaizaJournals 4 года назад +1

    You’re amazing Anna!! ❤️

  • @itsdeonlol
    @itsdeonlol 4 года назад +37

    Fun fact: Being single makes you a stronger person.

    • @deanna6742
      @deanna6742 4 года назад +14

      Well being in relationships and learning abt other ppl and how to handle situations is what actually makes you stronger. You need experiences to grow and as a result u remain single.

    • @raygin6581
      @raygin6581 4 года назад +1

      Oh bullshit

  • @AlexandraBarbin
    @AlexandraBarbin 4 года назад +4

    2:04, genius, I laughed so hard.

  • @lunaluna6474
    @lunaluna6474 4 года назад

    i swear your videos are always so relevant to what im currently going through its bizarre

  • @b.w.uhrenholt5030
    @b.w.uhrenholt5030 4 года назад

    This came at JUST the right time for me, thank god for Anna Akana

  • @selainx
    @selainx 4 года назад +5

    I wonder whether many people at all are happy in their long term relationships. And whether the happily in love tend to have certain traits. How much of the population is unmotivated, unhappy, flaky, addicted, unfeeling, anxious, and so on?
    I think maybe I'm just too isolated. I don't really know any examples in my personal life of healthy, loving relationships, while there are plenty of instances of unhealthy, unloving relationships.
    But it seems to me that some people will never find anyone they love in return. Yes, not one out of the 7 billion people on the planet. Esp those who are mentally or physically ill.
    I could have fallen in love once upon a time. But now, I'd have to find someone who not only could fall in love with someone as broken as me, but I could fall in love with as well.
    Could be worse. I could be someone who can't stand to be alone.

  • @Wiseman3001
    @Wiseman3001 4 года назад +17

    *raises hand*
    Me, I know 1700s sea shanties :>

  • @traciezou3768
    @traciezou3768 4 года назад +1

    I have a dismissive attachment style working towards the secure attachment style. Self-love and open communication are the keys.
    Have the awareness that you are complete and enough, and be the person you want to attract to life.
    2020 didn’t have an easy start, but that’s the year for a change and we will make it better!

  • @TheJereld
    @TheJereld 3 года назад

    You made real progress today. Good job.

  • @elliyo4286
    @elliyo4286 4 года назад +101

    I'm in a long-term relationship w a man and have never been with a woman. So I haven't come out in years. Any tips on how to deal with people not believing your sexuality?

    • @corkydukeII5898
      @corkydukeII5898 4 года назад +15

      Move to California. You'll run into many sympathetic people in the same boat : D

    • @renatamarques8610
      @renatamarques8610 4 года назад +28

      I get it can be frustrating, but does it really matter if they believe it or not? It's not even something they should have doubts about lol, if you say you're a certain way, the least people can do is respect it.
      PS: sorry if I sound rude, I just get mad in situations like these, even if it doesn't envolve me...

    • @julzamidala2865
      @julzamidala2865 4 года назад +4

      Agree with Renata Margues that true friends will believe you because they recognize your agency as a human being. Coming out is scary (amhik), one of the biggest fears is that your friends and family will abandon you but if you flip that over your being your authentic self is a test of the other's relationship with you. If they truly value you and their connection to you they will accept you and affirm you... though it can be a bumpy ride for all involved. Patience is a virtue however frustrating or painful but the most important thing that the people allowed to be in your life accept, support and love you as you. The good news is that as an out person there's another whole world of people waiting to welcome you and celebrate you!

    • @kdonline119
      @kdonline119 4 года назад +10

      Embody Geralt of Rivia: hit them with a hard stare and a “Hmmm”. In all seriousness, you don’t have to prove your sexuality. If people don’t believe you, that’s their problem. You know who you are and who you love. I’ve now gotten to the point where I actively enjoy correcting people who assume I’m straight. I just stare them out and enjoy their discomfort, make of that what you will!

    • @greengurlg7
      @greengurlg7 4 года назад +5

      Worth while to examine why you feel the need to make sure people believe your sexuality and if the same people consistently invalidate your sexuality have a candid talk about it with them. You may find that you need to cut some folks out of your life and set boundaries with people.

  • @santox_digitalx1981
    @santox_digitalx1981 4 года назад +4

    Damn, the only time I felt attacked about commitment.

  • @fannybett9167
    @fannybett9167 4 года назад

    I don't know how your videos always suit my current situation, but I love it

  • @minjimeanjee
    @minjimeanjee 4 года назад

    Eyeliner on point! Also, good content.

  • @AlizzaBliss
    @AlizzaBliss 4 года назад +54

    When it comes to relationships I'm full-on avoidant lol I literally have a doormat that says "Go away" with a pic of a cat throwing up double middle fingers lol
    *Person shows interest in me
    Me: I bite.

    • @sophiemay9645
      @sophiemay9645 4 года назад +3

      😂
      I got 50/50 avoidant and secure from a test. When ppl try to hit on me I just freeze and suddenly act super cold while internally I just wanna run and hide 😅

  • @minku4483
    @minku4483 4 года назад +4

    Dating coach time

  • @karenbellmeditation4525
    @karenbellmeditation4525 4 года назад

    I love your video's! Not only are they insightful. They are so funny! Amazing work!!!
    You will meet your true love! 🙏🙏🙏

  • @BeautybyEm337
    @BeautybyEm337 4 года назад

    every single one of your videos is a personal attack!! i love it ngl

  • @shelbytomy07
    @shelbytomy07 4 года назад +5

    Fun fact : a fact is fun

  • @marsroverr
    @marsroverr 4 года назад +15

    Bold of you to assume I want a relationship with anyone at all.......

  • @tallulahwonders2816
    @tallulahwonders2816 3 года назад

    i’m so grateful for self awareness tho cause it’s brought me to learn most of this without therapy. and thanks to my internet searches guided by self awareness of my needs!

  • @lifestylewithedna
    @lifestylewithedna 4 года назад

    Your videos are so crisp and professional even ur content. You deserve more subscribers.. but u are on ur way to that

  • @JohnDoe-tt6en
    @JohnDoe-tt6en 4 года назад +5

    You know you're afraid of commitment when you actually experience the emotion of anxiety in response to the prospect of commitment. Everything else is your interpretation of behavior that might only circumstantially indicate an underlying aversion to commitment based on inter-subjectively untestable pseudo scientific theories that can't tell us anything about the inherent nature of human consciousness (I mean psychology in general which at best could only help us to predict observable human behavior based on noting correlating variables and certain patterns which isn't even it's sole claim to expertise. Knowledge about the nature of consciousness could only stem from literal introspection, meaning personal experience or imagination, truths about the universal nature of consciousness are 'philosophical' and can't be derived from the scientific method that biology, physics or chemistry involve).

  • @mohamedaminehadji6415
    @mohamedaminehadji6415 4 года назад +4

    Fun fact: society made you believe that not wanting to commit is wrong, whereas it never was

  • @iambakuhatsu
    @iambakuhatsu 4 года назад

    loved the fun facts call back. All your content is great, but its fun to see some hints of your standup creep in!

  • @williamhenning4320
    @williamhenning4320 4 года назад

    Why is this channel so good!?

  • @gnalee8948
    @gnalee8948 4 года назад +3

    She's straight up talking about me 🤦🏻‍♀️🤣

  • @osmosisjones4912
    @osmosisjones4912 4 года назад +6

    If 🐓 are Gross. and she loves you inspite of your having 🐓 then at best your with someone who finds Discussed. I can see how that would were down self worth . . that's only at best she has much hold over you.
    the friend zone would much better if loves you because your personality then why not just be with someone of the same gender

  • @allizzone
    @allizzone 3 года назад

    This is mind blowing!

  • @Hoykoy24
    @Hoykoy24 4 года назад +2

    I love how you mention your therapy sessions