If a dowry is used in a positive way, the girl can build up a strong family along with a good husband, But the truth is not all husbands are good husbands, then it is not just dowried it is the husband that is the issue.
Why am I crying, watching this?! I got married when I was 23, to the love of my life. We were both against dowry, he stopped his family from the talks about it, I stopped my dad my giving a single penny. We even bought our wedding clothes with our own money (that's all that we could afford then). As years went by, I told my father that I do not need any part of the inheritance because we earn well and did not feel the need to claim the share. Always been proud of my decisions, but this speech is eye-opening. Inheritance is a right and daughters shouldn't be deprived of it. Thank you Madam.
Those from an economically stable position should also think that the practice of giving and taking of dowry, and also denial of inheritance, is copied down to the last rung of the society. It has a crippling effect on all, but it is blithely accepted, as an acceptable 'given'. My first cousin sister, an only parent, has made arrangements for the short stay of only one hundred of her would be son in law's wedding entourage( It could be less if the threat of coronavirus leads to a reduction in the number of wedding guests allowed. But the pre booking has been made. Hotels have ensured that 250 guests can be accommodated, by UP state law, in an open air setting! And she has paid in advance.....) as they are residents of another state
I’m so proud of my grandmother who said she wouldn’t give her daughter’s hand to a family that demanded dowry, and this was 30 years ago! We have a long gap to fill in then attitudes of people. God alone a if that’s ever going to happen!
Yes absolutely right! Same in our family, if they want dowery they don’t have any morals, you don’t marry daughters to such scoundrels, no matter who ever they are. However you can support your son or daughter of your own free will afterwards but it’s never requirements.
@@aravindhsm1287 It’s not interpreted correctly, we don’t give daughters, they go to live with their husbands but they don’t belong or own her, she is still free to change her staying, if not comfortable, DON’T EVER MAKE COMPROMISES, THAT WILL LEAD TO WASTE AND DEPRESSION, STAY IF YOU LIKE OR GET OUT.
My widowed sister in law who stayed with her brothers in her parents home almost did not get a share of her fathers property. It would have been disastrous if her brothers had not been forced by me, to give her a share.I'm married to one of her brothers who felt that she could live with any of her brothers for a few months of the year.But I put my foot down. Today she lives happily in her own apartment sndanages her life well.
we dont see sis in laws like you these days.. some sis in laws want complete share of the property to her husband not even his brothers forget about sisters..
You're amazing. But Indian women's fate cannot be dependent on the rare good hearts like you. People like you are rare. We need laws to protect women's inheritance. As per Islam laws, women get only 1/3rd share to that of male. My father and his brothers put their foot down and made sure that they and their 4 sisters got an equal share. However, my mother and her 2 sisters hardly got anything as her brothers were adamant about keeping almost everything for themselves.
When she said. "If they were 6 brothers they had happily shared their inheritance., why not with 3brothers and 3 sisters.' It changed my whole perspective .
@@shreyasridhar3323 it makes sense, if my sister takes a piece from me it will be shared with her family but i will left with less, and i don't want my wife heritage cause i have enough,
She was given a chance. Imagine what you can achieve if you're given one. We, women, are half the population. We don't need the world. The world needs us!
@@eaglemgtow2789 sure. But by world, I meant it's people. And if by world doesnt need you, you mean its people dont need you... then what are you even doing here?
@@khushiyadav1289 And you are dependent on the society for everything. We are inter-dependent, for food, Money, shelter, clothing, resources, Oil, technology, entertainment, goals. Imagine a world where no one exists but you. There would be no goal, nothing to live for or by... complete Nihilism. 😂 So don't tell me this Bs that you don't need the world. Dude, the human collective can live without you just fine.... Maybe you need the society more
@@eaglemgtow2789 I'm sorry I don't see where all this is coming from. But I can tell you where my words come from. Look at ma'am Leila Seth. When she was struggling to get good legal guidance, the people didn't know its worth and pushed her away. But looking at what she achieved after all these years, its pretty clear that the world needs people like her more, than otherwise. But I also respect your views, although they are completely off the point I wanted to convey.
My mom when she talked about her equal rights she was called out as greedy and cast out of the family completely even though she was never demanding anything, all she did was bring up this topic once in the discussion
Exactly same thing happened with my mother. But I am very much proud of my mother for taking a stance on this even though she is illiterate and faced criticism by his brother and brothers family. But I can proudly say my mother is much more educated than the ones who hold degrees and don't do justice.
My mother didn’t have anything to inherit from her parents except the jewels that was given by her brothers, hence she too repeated the same for me jewels and a car for which my husband didn’t even have adequate funds to maintain. The money in lieu of promised ornaments were all spent by my husbands parents for the marriage expenses too. I am a very smart girl who didn’t have any qualms of letting go, so I sold all my jewels and purchased a 2 bhk in banglore in 2001 ie the wisest thing we have done in life. So at present I too doesn’t have any inheritance from my parents property as they claim it was given as dowry Sambhavami yuge yuge
I salute her. Mam, I have been fighting for Daughter's rights. Discrimination begins at home itself. Parents must not Discriminate. Neena Singh Advocate
Hi Neena I agree, I am a lawyer too but my parents just got me married off paying dowry as per groom side demand, I didn’t have the guts at the age of 23
@@ferozasayyed4987 Is the inheritance sharing equal between men and women ? I dont think so. It is equal to 1/3 of the men, and through the same sharia, you cannot equal yourself to the men in your own community. And through sharia, there is even more humiliation for a women. So please, dont even start.
Or perhaps you have never been to a civil court to hear cases of inheritance between brothers. which is fine. Most people don't. But what is the excuse of this "judge" to not know such simple fact? OR maybe she is just saying things she knows are not true just to push a particular narrative.
Once I just casually asked my father why is that the father's unheritence is only given to the son even when the law says it should be shared equally to the daughters as well. On hearing me it almost angered my entire family. I was blasted with all possible invalid explanations. I was infact told I have a greed over his property and only the son is going to feed them and take care of them in their old age. Thankful to my husband for not demanding any dowry and i was neither gifted anything during my marriage. 5 years past that conversation today things are different. They demand me take care of them and I am reminded of the legal rules that the daughters are supposed to take care of their old parents. Even without the law I am ready to help my parents any time and also don't expect any shares from him. What hurts me more is the mindset of the society which never changes no matter how educated we become. Highly appreciate this video. 🙏some where the change has to begin.
remind your parents thatbalthough you are happy to help, it is not fair they leave everything to your brother...if so then brother should step in and do most of the helping
This lady is gracious and cares for women she doesn't even know how compassion can change the world. I admire her courage and strength and hope my children have the same principles and determination to change the mindsets. The subjects this lady touched are so profound and can mould and direct a woman's future life because injustice in any form is hurtful
Very inspiring to listen to this brave woman. I am from middle Europe and here we women are so lucky for having achieved almost total equality to men. But this was a long and difficult process. I am so proud of and so thankful to all the women who were tough and stood up against society and managed their own way. The most difficult process is probably to stand up against other women and own relatives. Best regards to India 🌻
I am so proud to say that my husband didn't ask bribes. My daughter too got married to a boy without dowry.We gave her an equal share of our property. We did not demand dowry for our son too.
ASHA THOMAS Madam -- your society , your native place , and your up bringing makes lot of difference -- I have seen even Bride groom side is sharing expenses of marriage day function . Those are all honorable exception and I call them model to this society .
This ted talk must be viral . Many of us think we know what is right and wrong but when the times come, all cowardice comes to the surface. May Indians have the power and will to do the right thing.
Realize that she is a judge. She has not heard of the huge pile of inheritance cases in Indian courts - many of them between brothers? Yet she is pretending there are no problems there? Now sisters also have to join court battles. Which is good for her profession - lawyers - but bad for families. Congratulations. You created new problems and didn't fix old problems.
"Be legal; not illegal" Judge Leila Seth, inspiring indeed; so much so I cry to tears. Whoever thought a soft spoken, with such disarming manner has a motivation/will as strong as steel for the good of us women....I am sure men get benefits of her sense of equality too.
Don't take dowry and demand your inheritance. This I agree. But I would go one step further (surely while advising my 2 daughters) : - Marry after you are in a position where you are capable of taking care of yourself. - Have kids when you are capable of partly bringing up that kid as well. Key issue is that girls remain dependent on father or husband or son through their life...
If girls are given the opportunity equally in her education compared to her brother educated enough and supported by parents until they are independent as they do to their son there is no question of dependence of het on brothers or parents
And why do men depend on women for their food, laundy, cleaning and so many other things. Let me tell you I am self sufficient earning lady and my income is no less than my hubby. My hubby also helps me in household but that is his favour/grace ( एहसान) ... mine earning is duty towards family, his performing household is extra care/ being extra good. If I make a mistake I.e. blunder. His blunders are to be ignored.... as they say to err is human... we need to change mentality, attitude towards women not the system...
@@DK.9831 I completely agree on your point. At home chores we aren't allowed to make one mistake, which doesn't even matter really. But when a man does mistake in his business or socially there is no one to call him out or make him accountable.
Dear madam, your talk should be a true eye-opener to many in our country, who discriminate against a girl child. Ironically even in the 21st century, a girl is not treated equally to a boy child. I wish all fathers, brothers, mothers take your appeal seriousely.
hello mam. i am a boy and i dont care about boy or a girl child,giving birth to a healthy child is what i want...and mam most of the mothers and fathers dont discriminate at homes...many people have both son and daughter but they dont do such things...but discrimination on girl child happens in villages ...done by fools... god bless u mam
About 10 years ago a news broadcast or special on tv showed a poor poor young woman who was a beautiful young Indian woman. She burned 3 percent of her body except for her nose and upper face. Her husband did it to her, her dowery was rejected by him because it wasn't enough. I have never forgotten it. The poor girl died from her infection of the burns.
This is the root of all injustice to women in our country. Wish this presentation becomes the most talked about and brings about real change for all communities.
🎻THE HINDU SUCCESSION ACT-- 1956 🎻 THE DOWRY ACT-- 1961 Really ma'am I've no words after your words... Bcoz your each and every word is just heart touching ❤️
I just want to mention that her reference to a 'suitable boy' at 4:11 was a pun which many in the audience seemed to miss. Not to mention, a great personality and way ahead of her time.
I read news of dowry deaths in local newspaper every second day. And in every case the parents of the lady knew that she was being tortured by her husband and in-laws. But instead of supporting her and taking legal action. The parents asks their daughter to adjust. And at last many such women who are not supported by their parents are forced to suicide or murdered.
Yes.. women shouldn't get married without being financially self-dependent. It is because of lack of education and proper guidance, they start thinking of getting married instead of becoming self-dependent. I think teachers can play a big role in this by telling them why it is important to become self-dependent and how it can save them from domestic violence. Also government should increase marriage age of women to 21.
@@praveenkumarsilaniya8074 Solution marry only a financial stable man who doesn't obsess over a woman 's paycheck or baby bearing ability. If a woman is leaving the parents house, also earning and doing domestic chores then what extra does man bring to the table is a serious question to ponder about. Not to forget forcing to have kids.
I think this kind of parents who cannot see their daughters miseries they just wanted to get rid of their daughter/daughters by marrying them off....they don't care about her wellbeing or whether she will survive that marriage.... If their daughters are murdered by her husband or in-laws that's totally acceptable to them as long as she doesn't die unmarried at her parent's house...
@@suchitradas7442 What parent can do ? Can Parent call back their married daughter ? will socieity accept that ?.. I have live case where in very close relative was ditched by her husband and she is educated girl -- But she was not prepared to go to Father's home -- Father had decent life with independent house and agriculture land etc.. YET daughter did not go there due to social pressure .. Father carries burdon from the childhood of girl baby and once marriage is done father feels his burdon is over .. Even aftr that if daughter is facing problem at husbands house what do you expect father to do ?. Only solution is No marriage -- No children - Only ZOMOTO and Swiggy ordering throughout life
Wonderful.... she is an example of never judge a book by its cover. Also She's one of the luckiest... Bcoz some people even if they don't demand dowry they treat daughter in law as if they own her or bought her. So people in India can't be predicted according to their not demanding a dowry attitude.
I can't express my feelings after listening to her...I don't know how this video got recommended....but her words are pure gold. I could feel the truth in every word of hers. My sister who was married 2.5 year ago. My father spent almost 35 lacs in her marriage...bt still she was not happy n now has filed for divorce. Spending money n giving dowry doesn't ensure that ur daughter would be happy. My parents n my family ...we support her. She's still studying...doing different courses. My father took so many loans and debts for her marriage. Now we are financially unstable.Still he's spending so much on her,my n my brother's education .... Taking debts...so that we can stand on our own feets. I know after a year or 2 we will be financially good. Educate your daughters please.... If they are educated enough you can stand against dowry. I won't give dowry....neither would my brother take one. These small steps taken by every individual would change the society slowly.let the change begin from us.🙏
"Spending money n giving dowry doesn't ensure that ur daughter would be happy." Absolutely true. You have to have a good mindset to be happy. Unfortunately too many parents today are thinking that being financially stable is happiness too and are using their daughters to provide additional income to themselves.
Inheritance being emphasised & explained articulately without biasness towards any gender . Loved how she carefully chose words to put the matter in front and make us all sit, listen, think and take action against dowry and injustice in inheritance sharing .
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I wish my brother saw this. My father's and mother's legal will was to divide everything equally, yet my brother did not respect it. Our relatives advised that he is your only relative alive, keep the relationship and forget the money, he will give whatever he can. I feel terrible about all this, even more after watching this video. I don't want to be the weak daughter anymore, the one who's father empowered her.
If your brother loves you enough why does he care about the property. It's sad that money is more important than family to people. You are her only relative too. Why shouldn't he try to save the relation?
Same thing happened with my friend. Although she didn't had even a single documents of the property inherited from her parents. Today she won the case in her favour. Truth take time to out but be determined to do it. If the siblings doesn't care to share equally fight for it.
Aastha Sabharwal, I know exactly how you feel. I had a cousin sister who faced the same problem. The brother was so arrogant and insolent that she filed a case against him, and got her share of the family property. I pray your brother changes his mind and gives you what is rightfully yours..🤗
I told my grandparents very clearly that I want my mother's share . Though my grandparents are very loving individuals , they have a very old fashioned mindset that only my maternal uncle should inherit everything. But atleast one should raise voice against this ill culture right ?? Now guess what ....my grandparents are totally convinced by me after I explained everything logically to them. Finally the awareness is spreading ! ❤️💫
This video had literally opened my eyes. Passing down the father's inheritance to their sons sounds okay and fine but when a daughter asks about her share she will become a greedy person who had no shame . This double standards and attitudes had been deeply rooted in our mind and you can easily understand it by the live example mentioned in the video.And now it's high time to talk about our rights without holding back anymore..
Just today i am discussing same with my brother,about my share in the property,he was looking like i was joking but i am not i am serious,he also looking like i am greedy
Solution for sharing inheritance -is having only one Child or not getting married - This sharing business will never find its satisfactory level and there is nothing called equitable and just behavior by parents etc.. Parent perceive what is right they do it.
Not only Women empowering moves and laws, it's the total mindset that needs change, rightly as Mrs Seth has put it, fast-forward the change, else this huge patriarchal society would crush thousands and lakhs by its dominance 😔 Nice talk madam, thanks
We, five sisters, are so proud that our parents raised us like, what they would have done if they had sons. Thanks ma'am, so well said attitude change is the main thing.😔🙏🙏
Surprising why her sweet reference to 'a suitable boy' was not picked up by the audience. My respectful homage to this great achiever, her inspiring words will be with us always.May she rest in peace.
Such a mind provoking speech, I wish I heard this before I got married. My dowry was my hard earned savings which went off to settle land taxes of my future spouse. Till know I haven’t got to know the breakdown of my hard earned savings nor has it been returned to me. 😞
@@kavishwarmokal124, over the years I have very little respect or affection for him. I am just waiting for him to ...... I know it’s a mean thought but I can’t help wishing, praying and hoping for him to be out of my life forever😞
Truly sorry to hear that, you have to endure this injustice and that this kind of marriages and dowry exchanges are still being done in this age where things should have been more equal. I pray that your marriage would have a miraculous turn around and you would be cherished, loved and appreciated as an equal. Women and men are equal but differ in function.
I was married to a guy to pay to feed him and his parents and siblings. My own parents distanced me and luckily I got divorced. My book Mila Rising talks about why parents are against dark-skinned daughters.
That really sucks. I hope you begin learning to talk to yourself so that things make more sense - similar to the speaker here. Only then will you get inspired as to how to gain back what you want. You should not have had to deplete your entire savings to your husband to get married. It created a terrible imbalance.
Parents will never take the words if a girl raise a voice bcz they also followed same dowry rule and they will continue that for the rest of their life
@@sailakshmi7626 Then, take stand for yourself instead of simply cribbing about the wrongdoings. You are also the part of the society. So, bring the change that is needed. All the best !! 👍
You’re right when you talk about inheritance your parents start seeing you as greedy beings out there to rob them. Bollywood culture has also contributed to this paranoia by showing that after distribution of wealth parents are thrown out by their children. Only those children who give up their rights are worthy.
Oh dear sister, what a loving appeal to all!! It shows your love for all. One famous Indian saint said, "Love All whom he loves." You just did that in action, in these loving, touching, and kind words. May God be with you always and guide all of us further!
My heart cried hearing your speech, I can't believe how my brother whom I never expected to cheat me could do it. But the bible says no one will go unpunished. I just praise the lord Jesus for righteousness n justice is the foundation of his throne
That is a true liberated woman standing tall wearing her Indian and marital identity with pride and with no apology. She doe not need to burn her bra to prove her equal standing with men; it can be achieved with much grace and dignity.
Everyday I learn something new. I hope the new generation break that habit , we are living in a new world. Let us educate, educate & educate It will make a difference.
Good point, we need to educate them and bring awareness.I didn't get any inheritance more dowry was paid. Forced marriage which ended up in divorce. parents distance me the day after my marriage. I like to inspire women through my book Mila Rising, if I can make it, you can too!
Madam, First of all,let me give you a standing ovation!..You are really a fine human being.Your speech was mesmerizing and I listened to it as l would listen to a beautiful poem...I hope the ideas you were trying to put across would reach more people and bring about the change that we all need so badly. Hats off to you and I appreciate your efforts!...
These days groom should be put to shame if he keeps silent on demands put by his family during marriage on brides family.Even demand for 3 day marriage in the name of tradition is a shameful thing.
@@ramanipalle-swaraamrutham7229 This is huge problem that so called parent’s boy an Munna’s are not boys when they are taking dowery. They are worse than animals. Try to be human for the mother who gave you a birth. Our so called society is no longer society that they demand such rules of dowery. It’s a greed. Pure Greed, that has grown in men’s blood. Women have to step up to stop this. Which will change the thinking of so called society.
In in of my niece marriage helplessly watching. There is no dowry, but they want! Marriage on 3 days grand scale. Bride family reduced to entertainer as well as sponsors of entertainers for not just groom family.But to their relatives and friends as well!!
@@pushpakathpal7812 You're absolutely right, Pushpa ji! And I have already put forward my idea within my family that neither am I going to set up my son for sale, since he is invaluable, not valueless, nor am I going to buy my sons-in-law who also cannot be valued against a sum of money. These are pure relationships that we are going to build with love as the current, not bargains that we decide upon against currency.
We are 2 daughters and I was rejected by many only because I upfront told the boy that I am against dowry and would not give a pit.but I assure that I will be contributing myself by working as I have been given a good education. As wished by God I got a perfect better half who respected my decision. So it's the change in us we must bring inspite of parental or societal demands.. and that has to be respected by our parents and others.
I think that may be the only way to change things, respectable and successful women refusing to marry anyone who asks for a dowry and making it a shameful act that no decent woman will tolerate.
Her speech got me into tears.. commendable thoughts!!!! I appreciate the fact that such ladies are still trying to help society change their minds about dowry and most importantly fathers inheritance.. After all why a daughter should be insecure about her own future!
What a speech! Spellbound and eye opener to all the parents.I come from a family of 2 brothers and 7 sisters. My father divided his property into three equal parts and gave my brothers their share and wrote a Will to give his share to all 7 daughters but unfortunately my mother after my father’s death did not want any of the daughters to get a single penny and fully supported my brothers to occupy my fathers properties.Till today we are fighting in courts from 1998.
Very true, girls just want equal status and they prove how much they can do for both the families. From childhood itself we should treat girl with respect and dignity. Allow and involve her in making decisions for family and herself, and see how much she will care for you in your old age.
She is such a great motivation to society. Whatever time it is we should stand against injustice towards us, be confident and make persistent efforts towards ones ideal life. Don't let anyone belittle you. And also keep in mind that not all people in this world have crooked thoughts. There are both good and bad people.
Here, here, .....WELL SAID!! I am the fourth girl in a family of 5 siblings - 4 girls and 1 brother (the youngest); my father has already signed off our family home inheritance, to my brother and we live in the UK, lol, this is one of the reasons, why I will always be the rebel of the family, as we grew up believing my brother dropped down from the heavens as a God, however, us girls were not seen as Lakshmi and have been treated like second class citizens, compared to our youngest sibling - the brother. It is a sad truth and one which my parents will not readily admit, but, it's that old fashioned Indian mentality and if I had a daughter of my own, I would brake this karmic pattern and ensure she knew, that she was a Divine Goddess, a Devi with the Shakti to master her own destiny. Namaste, love and light Dear Leila, many thanks for sharing!
That happens in the USA, too. My own brother tried to coerce my father to change his will and trust after our mother died...until I stood up for myself and my sister.
Excellent speech made by u mam.a women should stand on her leg so that she doesn't want to depend on her husband or her brother for all her needs in life.we should eradicate this dowry system so that we can save many lives of women. We have to make and give a strong punishments the injustice against women. I proud of you mam 👏👏👏👌.
She's an inspiration, truly. I've never heard someone put these thoughts into words so beautifully and effortlessly. I really wish more people listened to what she has to say. I must admit, sometimes I genuinely feel like this country has nothing but a grey future but people like her are the reason give me hope.
My uncle (dad’s brother) tried to force my mother to give up her share of the property when my dad passed away. My mother stood her ground. I am so proud of her. Clearly no one was around to support her. And today the same moochers try to milk out of her whatever they can when they can.
I lost my dad at age of 13, I had a 1.5year old sister at that time...my father's family abandoned us..my father had not made much property by then.. we did not have anything.. my mother's family agreed to take care of us...now after 15 years they took all my mother's earnings and they are not willing to give us my mother's share also.. what is the value of girl child in this country??? Even if my mother goes legally and flights she might get property but she will get a big title that she is selfish and stole her brothers rights.. instead I believe in earn your property and don't depend on any one... specially when you are born as girl in this country..it's a sin asking for property!!!
It's really sad to hear your story. It's really horrible the ways of the old culture about bias between sons n daughters. Hope there will be a law that dictates equality between male n female. By the way, I'm a guy writing this. 😄
I am grateful for this universe for giving me an amazing mother who made me understand that such great thinking patterns as madam leila seith is generated at home simply by the way you are treated. girls need to be treated as strong humans not as a bunch of humans wanting attention and support from males all the time.
This is such an inspiring video. My mother is also struggling to get her ancestral property rights in Jaipur city. Her brother and his wife tortures and harasses her a lot. Still she raised her voice, fighting in court since Sept 2021 and due to threat of her life took police help.
No words to say 👏👏👏👏 But only one thing is distrubing me through out her (long) speech, she is standing. At the age of 80+ they could have given chair for her while giving speech.
She is such an inspiration to all ..RIP such a great soul 🙏🙏🙏 After hearing this...i feel really lucky...i am a single girl child of my parents...yet my parents never raised me under any kind of stereotype...and they support me in every way they can so that i may study well and succeed in my life...my parents say that I am their fixed investment 😅😅 and that i would fulfill all their wishes they have...and i would surely do it....!!! Many of our neighbours used to ask my mother what would you do after she is married...you dont have a son....then my mother used to tell them that 'i dont care if i dont have a son...my daughter will take care of me'....and my parents always tell me.... achieve ur dream and show the world what a girl can do..... I AM SO LUCKY...I AM PROUD OF MY PARENTS.... 😍
My mother took care of her ailing mother on her own and my father supported her. Her brother only visited our house when she died to take care of her last rites. Better to not have sons if they are like my uncle.
Leilaji so adamant and firm - a true role model you are to the world! I am lucky being a Chitrapur Saraswat Brahmin - we have never had any dowry tradition!
"Don't let your daughters down - and they will not let you down.".
Such words of Truth.
Daughters never let you down irrespective
how did those males get here , ??? is the first question , gratitude and respect is the outcome
@@vickipedia3253
I can introduce you to some daughters I know. Sorry.
If a dowry is used in a positive way, the girl can build up a strong family along with a good husband, But the truth is not all husbands are good husbands, then it is not just dowried it is the husband that is the issue.
@@shivbaba2672 Not all girls/wives are good either. What about that?
Why am I crying, watching this?!
I got married when I was 23, to the love of my life. We were both against dowry, he stopped his family from the talks about it, I stopped my dad my giving a single penny. We even bought our wedding clothes with our own money (that's all that we could afford then). As years went by, I told my father that I do not need any part of the inheritance because we earn well and did not feel the need to claim the share. Always been proud of my decisions, but this speech is eye-opening. Inheritance is a right and daughters shouldn't be deprived of it. Thank you Madam.
Those from an economically stable position should also think that the practice of giving and taking of dowry, and also denial of inheritance, is copied down to the last rung of the society. It has a crippling effect on all, but it is blithely accepted, as an acceptable 'given'. My first cousin sister, an only parent, has made arrangements for the short stay of only one hundred of her would be son in law's wedding entourage( It could be less if the threat of coronavirus leads to a reduction in the number of wedding guests allowed. But the pre booking has been made. Hotels have ensured that 250 guests can be accommodated, by UP state law, in an open air setting! And she has paid in advance.....) as they are residents of another state
i cried reading your story, i don't even know why.
It is our right ! don't shy away from it or let any man or woman emotionally blackmail you into thinking you do not need inheritance
should be for the Father or mother , whoever has the money, to decide what to do with his her money,
really emotional for me too.
I’m so proud of my grandmother who said she wouldn’t give her daughter’s hand to a family that demanded dowry, and this was 30 years ago! We have a long gap to fill in then attitudes of people. God alone a if that’s ever going to happen!
Granny power!!!!!!!
why should we give a daughter to someone,isnt it a mutual relationship?
@@sunp852 never marry to a family of greedy people..goes both ways
Yes absolutely right! Same in our family, if they want dowery they don’t have any morals, you don’t marry daughters to such scoundrels, no matter who ever they are. However you can support your son or daughter of your own free will afterwards but it’s never requirements.
@@aravindhsm1287 It’s not interpreted correctly, we don’t give daughters, they go to live with their husbands but they don’t belong or own her, she is still free to change her staying, if not comfortable, DON’T EVER MAKE COMPROMISES, THAT WILL LEAD TO WASTE AND DEPRESSION, STAY IF YOU LIKE OR GET OUT.
My widowed sister in law who stayed with her brothers in her parents home almost did not get a share of her fathers property. It would have been disastrous if her brothers had not been forced by me, to give her a share.I'm married to one of her brothers who felt that she could live with any of her brothers for a few months of the year.But I put my foot down. Today she lives happily in her own apartment sndanages her life well.
we dont see sis in laws like you these days.. some sis in laws want complete share of the property to her husband not even his brothers forget about sisters..
U are great!
You're amazing. But Indian women's fate cannot be dependent on the rare good hearts like you. People like you are rare. We need laws to protect women's inheritance. As per Islam laws, women get only 1/3rd share to that of male. My father and his brothers put their foot down and made sure that they and their 4 sisters got an equal share. However, my mother and her 2 sisters hardly got anything as her brothers were adamant about keeping almost everything for themselves.
@tulsi Bhatia you've done a great job 💎👍
❤️❤️❤️ Most people do not share not because there isn't enough for everyone, they don't share because of greed. You're a wise woman 😊
When she said. "If they were 6 brothers they had happily shared their inheritance., why not with 3brothers and 3 sisters.' It changed my whole perspective
.
Bcoz lakhs are spend as dowry on their wedding
Cause when the women is married her husband heritage will be her too, but if she is given heritage from her brother she will get double heritage,
@@nsntchauhan5814 not like it's our choice.
@@VishalSharma-pu9sw the husband also owns what's her's. So your point doesn't really make sense.
@@shreyasridhar3323 it makes sense, if my sister takes a piece from me it will be shared with her family but i will left with less, and i don't want my wife heritage cause i have enough,
She was given a chance. Imagine what you can achieve if you're given one. We, women, are half the population. We don't need the world. The world needs us!
You don't need the world?
Image if Earth Vanishes or loses its atmosphere wtf you gonna go.
@@eaglemgtow2789 sure. But by world, I meant it's people. And if by world doesnt need you, you mean its people dont need you... then what are you even doing here?
@@khushiyadav1289 I am not here to please people's needs. I exist as an individual for my own needs and wants. For my own Survival and reproduction.
@@khushiyadav1289
And you are dependent on the society for everything. We are inter-dependent, for food, Money, shelter, clothing, resources, Oil, technology, entertainment, goals. Imagine a world where no one exists but you. There would be no goal, nothing to live for or by... complete Nihilism. 😂
So don't tell me this Bs that you don't need the world. Dude, the human collective can live without you just fine.... Maybe you need the society more
@@eaglemgtow2789 I'm sorry I don't see where all this is coming from. But I can tell you where my words come from. Look at ma'am Leila Seth. When she was struggling to get good legal guidance, the people didn't know its worth and pushed her away. But looking at what she achieved after all these years, its pretty clear that the world needs people like her more, than otherwise. But I also respect your views, although they are completely off the point I wanted to convey.
My mom when she talked about her equal rights she was called out as greedy and cast out of the family completely even though she was never demanding anything, all she did was bring up this topic once in the discussion
Exactly same thing happened with my mother. But I am very much proud of my mother for taking a stance on this even though she is illiterate and faced criticism by his brother and brothers family. But I can proudly say my mother is much more educated than the ones who hold degrees and don't do justice.
The attitude of parents should change
My mother didn’t have anything to inherit from her parents except the jewels that was given by her brothers, hence she too repeated the same for me jewels and a car for which my husband didn’t even have adequate funds to maintain. The money in lieu of promised ornaments were all spent by my husbands parents for the marriage expenses too. I am a very smart girl who didn’t have any qualms of letting go, so I sold all my jewels and purchased a 2 bhk in banglore in 2001 ie the wisest thing we have done in life. So at present I too doesn’t have any inheritance from my parents property as they claim it was given as dowry Sambhavami yuge yuge
She should say it over and over again. That's how the laws and right of people will be known.
🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂
I salute her. Mam, I have been fighting for Daughter's rights. Discrimination begins at home itself. Parents must not Discriminate. Neena Singh Advocate
Hi Neena I agree, I am a lawyer too but my parents just got me married off paying dowry as per groom side demand, I didn’t have the guts at the age of 23
@@aarvind3901 its ok everything is notin our control..don't feel guilty about it ..we learn as we go..awareness is important..
That's how powerful a woman looks ...if she has equal opportunity....👏👏
In islamic sharia no dowry but inheritence for girls
@Hikers Himalayas inheritece from parents Halala actually not practised i have not seen any body doing it
@@ferozasayyed4987 Is the inheritance sharing equal between men and women ?
I dont think so. It is equal to 1/3 of the men, and through the same sharia, you cannot equal yourself to the men in your own community.
And through sharia, there is even more humiliation for a women. So please, dont even start.
@@ferozasayyed4987 however, here she is not following sharia, and thats why she is where she is.
@@rupikasrivatsav8232 dear Rupika male gets double of female and female get s inhertence from his husband also
She came to lime light after 4 years of her demise. Grateful that we came across her. Om shanti 🙏
The youtube algorithm brought us here ✨✨✨
When she said brothers can share their father's property happily with their brother but not with their sister it shattered me.
Perhaps you just never allowed yourself to say it out loud.
Or perhaps you have never been to a civil court to hear cases of inheritance between brothers. which is fine. Most people don't. But what is the excuse of this "judge" to not know such simple fact? OR maybe she is just saying things she knows are not true just to push a particular narrative.
@@gangadin2873 of course these are not absolutes. I think you know that the judge is aware of court cases between brothers.
Once I just casually asked my father why is that the father's unheritence is only given to the son even when the law says it should be shared equally to the daughters as well. On hearing me it almost angered my entire family. I was blasted with all possible invalid explanations. I was infact told I have a greed over his property and only the son is going to feed them and take care of them in their old age. Thankful to my husband for not demanding any dowry and i was neither gifted anything during my marriage. 5 years past that conversation today things are different. They demand me take care of them and I am reminded of the legal rules that the daughters are supposed to take care of their old parents.
Even without the law I am ready to help my parents any time and also don't expect any shares from him. What hurts me more is the mindset of the society which never changes no matter how educated we become.
Highly appreciate this video. 🙏some where the change has to begin.
Education alone cannot change the mindset.. Need basic humanity
Yes the hypocrisy and the double standard is very detrimental to the society as a whole.
I was not given inherent because I have a leaning disability.
@@mahtazdin you still have a right to inherit and state should name a guardian to ensurebyounhave access and can spend your share as needed
remind your parents thatbalthough you are happy to help, it is not fair they leave everything to your brother...if so then brother should step in and do most of the helping
This lady is gracious and cares for women she doesn't even know how compassion can change the world. I admire her courage and strength and hope my children have the same principles and determination to change the mindsets. The subjects this lady touched are so profound and can mould and direct a woman's future life because injustice in any form is hurtful
Very inspiring to listen to this brave woman.
I am from middle Europe and here we women are so lucky for having achieved almost total equality to men. But this was a long and difficult process. I am so proud of and so thankful to all the women who were tough and stood up against society and managed their own way. The most difficult process is probably to stand up against other women and own relatives. Best regards to India 🌻
I am so proud to say that my husband didn't ask bribes. My daughter too got married to a boy without dowry.We gave her an equal share of our property. We did not demand dowry for our son too.
Your wisdom highly appreciated! Such attitude and action make difference in a way you don’t know!
ASHA THOMAS Madam -- your society , your native place , and your up bringing makes lot of difference -- I have seen even Bride groom side is sharing expenses of marriage day function . Those are all honorable exception and I call them model to this society .
This ted talk must be viral . Many of us think we know what is right and wrong but when the times come, all cowardice comes to the surface. May Indians have the power and will to do the right thing.
Realize that she is a judge. She has not heard of the huge pile of inheritance cases in Indian courts - many of them between brothers? Yet she is pretending there are no problems there? Now sisters also have to join court battles. Which is good for her profession - lawyers - but bad for families. Congratulations. You created new problems and didn't fix old problems.
@purnimatripathi7722 you are cute❤
Leila seth's mother is the reason why Madam is on the stage now motivating us
Her Ted talk brought tears to my eyes.....what an empowering and touching speech ....what an inspiring lady
One of the best speeches I have ever heard . She has the ability to persuade masses with her speech .
"Be legal; not illegal"
Judge Leila Seth, inspiring indeed; so much so I cry to tears.
Whoever thought a soft spoken, with such disarming manner has a motivation/will as strong as steel for the good of us women....I am sure men get benefits of her sense of equality too.
Don't take dowry and demand your inheritance. This I agree. But I would go one step further (surely while advising my 2 daughters) :
- Marry after you are in a position where you are capable of taking care of yourself.
- Have kids when you are capable of partly bringing up that kid as well.
Key issue is that girls remain dependent on father or husband or son through their life...
If girls are given the opportunity equally in her education compared to her brother educated enough and supported by parents until they are independent as they do to their son there is no question of dependence of het on brothers or parents
And why do men depend on women for their food, laundy, cleaning and so many other things. Let me tell you I am self sufficient earning lady and my income is no less than my hubby. My hubby also helps me in household but that is his favour/grace ( एहसान) ... mine earning is duty towards family, his performing household is extra care/ being extra good. If I make a mistake I.e. blunder. His blunders are to be ignored.... as they say to err is human... we need to change mentality, attitude towards women not the system...
I would like to hear your opinion on that too...
@@DK.9831 I completely agree on your point. At home chores we aren't allowed to make one mistake, which doesn't even matter really. But when a man does mistake in his business or socially there is no one to call him out or make him accountable.
Despite the fact that that would have a huge impact on the family.
Dear madam, your talk should be a true eye-opener to many in our country, who discriminate against a girl child. Ironically even in the 21st century, a girl is not treated equally to a boy child. I wish all fathers, brothers, mothers take your appeal seriousely.
That's true madam .
I am a victim
I am saddened by your reply Aga Arvind
@@aarvind3901 expand
hello mam.
i am a boy and i dont care about boy or a girl child,giving birth to a healthy child is what i want...and mam most of the mothers and fathers dont discriminate at homes...many people have both son and daughter but they dont do such things...but discrimination on girl child happens in villages ...done by fools...
god bless u mam
About 10 years ago a news broadcast or special on tv showed a poor poor young woman who was a beautiful young Indian woman. She burned 3 percent of her body except for her nose and upper face. Her husband did it to her, her dowery was rejected by him because it wasn't enough. I have never forgotten it. The poor girl died from her infection of the burns.
Namaste such a powerful oration ! N she is an achiever an empowered woman who is a beacon of light to the rest!
As the new youth of India ..we support your views and insights and we shall not repeat the injustice which was done to our ancestors. Jai Hind.
💪💪
I smiled while reading your comment. There is hope.. 😊
Islam is even worst
Yes. I believe in this generation and the new youth of India.
@@ramenomirice2767 He is correct, why bring his religion into this? This is the reason Muslims are hated across India. STOP.
Brilliant talk delivered so carefully that each word is meaningful and precious. Love this lady and her commitment to women's welfare. Bless her.
Мурашки побежали по коже, от слов в конце речи.....
От дочерей всего мира высказала, наболевшее...
Благодарю!!!!!!!!
Leila Seth is a legend !! We need more path breaking women in India like her !!
INSPIRATIONAL & MOTIVATIONAL🙏🙏
This is the root of all injustice to women in our country. Wish this presentation becomes the most talked about and brings about real change for all communities.
This grace and persona of a lady is very hard to find these days ! Absolutely wonderful speech here :)
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Mam you are my role model... Every lawyer woman gets inspired by you....lots of love, respect and salute
Ok now carry her torch forward.
This lady is so enchanting
🎻THE HINDU SUCCESSION ACT-- 1956
🎻 THE DOWRY ACT-- 1961
Really ma'am I've no words after your words... Bcoz your each and every word is just heart touching ❤️
I just want to mention that her reference to a 'suitable boy' at 4:11 was a pun which many in the audience seemed to miss.
Not to mention, a great personality and way ahead of her time.
What pun?
@@abcbdr6928 Her son authored a novel by the name 'A Suitable Boy'.
I read news of dowry deaths in local newspaper every second day. And in every case the parents of the lady knew that she was being tortured by her husband and in-laws. But instead of supporting her and taking legal action. The parents asks their daughter to adjust. And at last many such women who are not supported by their parents are forced to suicide or murdered.
Yes.. women shouldn't get married without being financially self-dependent. It is because of lack of education and proper guidance, they start thinking of getting married instead of becoming self-dependent. I think teachers can play a big role in this by telling them why it is important to become self-dependent and how it can save them from domestic violence. Also government should increase marriage age of women to 21.
@@praveenkumarsilaniya8074 Solution marry only a financial stable man who doesn't obsess over a woman 's paycheck or baby bearing ability. If a woman is leaving the parents house, also earning and doing domestic chores then what extra does man bring to the table is a serious question to ponder about. Not to forget forcing to have kids.
I think this kind of parents who cannot see their daughters miseries they just wanted to get rid of their daughter/daughters by marrying them off....they don't care about her wellbeing or whether she will survive that marriage.... If their daughters are murdered by her husband or in-laws that's totally acceptable to them as long as she doesn't die unmarried at her parent's house...
@@radhikag3291 that extra that a man or for the matter a woman would bring to table might be - a companionship n a bond of friendship trust etc..
@@suchitradas7442 What parent can do ? Can Parent call back their married daughter ? will socieity accept that ?.. I have live case where in very close relative was ditched by her husband and she is educated girl -- But she was not prepared to go to Father's home -- Father had decent life with independent house and agriculture land etc.. YET daughter did not go there due to social pressure .. Father carries burdon from the childhood of girl baby and once marriage is done father feels his burdon is over .. Even aftr that if daughter is facing problem at husbands house what do you expect father to do ?. Only solution is No marriage -- No children - Only ZOMOTO and Swiggy ordering throughout life
Wonderful.... she is an example of never judge a book by its cover. Also She's one of the luckiest... Bcoz some people even if they don't demand dowry they treat daughter in law as if they own her or bought her. So people in India can't be predicted according to their not demanding a dowry attitude.
What an Extraordinary and Holy Lady! Bless her soul and may she be in hapiness and peace in Paradise...
I can't express my feelings after listening to her...I don't know how this video got recommended....but her words are pure gold.
I could feel the truth in every word of hers. My sister who was married 2.5 year ago. My father spent almost 35 lacs in her marriage...bt still she was not happy n now has filed for divorce. Spending money n giving dowry doesn't ensure that ur daughter would be happy. My parents n my family ...we support her. She's still studying...doing different courses. My father took so many loans and debts for her marriage. Now we are financially unstable.Still he's spending so much on her,my n my brother's education .... Taking debts...so that we can stand on our own feets. I know after a year or 2 we will be financially good.
Educate your daughters please.... If they are educated enough you can stand against dowry. I won't give dowry....neither would my brother take one.
These small steps taken by every individual would change the society slowly.let the change begin from us.🙏
"Spending money n giving dowry doesn't ensure that ur daughter would be happy."
Absolutely true. You have to have a good mindset to be happy. Unfortunately too many parents today are thinking that being financially stable is happiness too and are using their daughters to provide additional income to themselves.
One of most heartouching yet reality check to society and an inspiration to me
Inheritance being emphasised & explained articulately without biasness towards any gender . Loved how she carefully chose words to put the matter in front and make us all sit, listen, think and take action against dowry and injustice in inheritance sharing .
Very NICE .
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I wish my brother saw this. My father's and mother's legal will was to divide everything equally, yet my brother did not respect it. Our relatives advised that he is your only relative alive, keep the relationship and forget the money, he will give whatever he can. I feel terrible about all this, even more after watching this video. I don't want to be the weak daughter anymore, the one who's father empowered her.
If your brother loves you enough why does he care about the property. It's sad that money is more important than family to people. You are her only relative too. Why shouldn't he try to save the relation?
Apply Hindu law Inheritance and fight....you will be married and your brother may need your help
I am an NRI and not sure how it would play out to file a case against him in India. But i will definitely explore my options.
Same thing happened with my friend. Although she didn't had even a single documents of the property inherited from her parents. Today she won the case in her favour. Truth take time to out but be determined to do it. If the siblings doesn't care to share equally fight for it.
Aastha Sabharwal,
I know exactly how you feel. I had a cousin sister who faced the same problem. The brother was so arrogant and insolent that she filed a case against him, and got her share of the family property. I pray your brother changes his mind and gives you what is rightfully yours..🤗
I told my grandparents very clearly that I want my mother's share . Though my grandparents are very loving individuals , they have a very old fashioned mindset that only my maternal uncle should inherit everything. But atleast one should raise voice against this ill culture right ??
Now guess what ....my grandparents are totally convinced by me after I explained everything logically to them.
Finally the awareness is spreading ! ❤️💫
If you succeeded in convincing old people to change long-ingrained beliefs, your speaking skills must be great. (Maybe you should become a lawyer?)
This video had literally opened my eyes. Passing down the father's inheritance to their sons sounds okay and fine but when a daughter asks about her share she will become a greedy person who had no shame .
This double standards and attitudes had been deeply rooted in our mind and you can easily understand it by the live example mentioned in the video.And now it's high time to talk about our rights without holding back anymore..
Just today i am discussing same with my brother,about my share in the property,he was looking like i was joking but i am not i am serious,he also looking like i am greedy
Solution for sharing inheritance -is having only one Child or not getting married - This sharing business will never find its satisfactory level and there is nothing called equitable and just behavior by parents etc.. Parent perceive what is right they do it.
I am stunned into silence by the pure power of this woman. I am reminded of the reason that I worship the Feminine Divine, MahaShakti
That is great. Are you doing anything to help women?
Not only Women empowering moves and laws, it's the total mindset that needs change, rightly as Mrs Seth has put it, fast-forward the change, else this huge patriarchal society would crush thousands and lakhs by its dominance 😔
Nice talk madam, thanks
Ok now carry the torch forward ...
This is what I expect from a TED Talk; : impactful .... Put it just how it needs to be heard.
What a powerful speech was that! The sheer convention in her eyes.Respect !
Amazing, we need women leader like her in our society.
We also need you to follow her to make a difference for everyone.
Although I am not from India and I have never been… I am so touched by this speech!!! It makes me want to go over there and speak up for these women!
We, five sisters, are so proud that our parents raised us like, what they would have done if they had sons. Thanks ma'am, so well said attitude change is the main thing.😔🙏🙏
Thanks 🙏
Surprising why her sweet reference to 'a suitable boy' was not picked up by the audience. My respectful homage to this great achiever, her inspiring words will be with us always.May she rest in peace.
RIP Mam. This was such an enchanting speech. Loved it.
Proud that she is 84 years old and still hasn't given up.
Such a mind provoking speech, I wish I heard this before I got married. My dowry was my hard earned savings which went off to settle land taxes of my future spouse. Till know I haven’t got to know the breakdown of my hard earned savings nor has it been returned to me. 😞
It's like you have been married blindly to settle your husband dues/loans/taxes whatever.
What exactly you see in your husband?
@@kavishwarmokal124, over the years I have very little respect or affection for him. I am just waiting for him to ...... I know it’s a mean thought but
I can’t help wishing, praying and hoping for him to be out of my life forever😞
Truly sorry to hear that, you have to endure this injustice and that this kind of marriages and dowry exchanges are still being done in this age where things should have been more equal. I pray that your marriage would have a miraculous turn around and you would be cherished, loved and appreciated as an equal. Women and men are equal but differ in function.
I was married to a guy to pay to feed him and his parents and siblings. My own parents distanced me and luckily I got divorced. My book Mila Rising talks about why parents are against dark-skinned daughters.
That really sucks. I hope you begin learning to talk to yourself so that things make more sense - similar to the speaker here. Only then will you get inspired as to how to gain back what you want. You should not have had to deplete your entire savings to your husband to get married. It created a terrible imbalance.
Highly inspired 💯.
Madam's knowledge, grit and elegance is an awareness in itself.
A perfect example of a Beautiful Woman.🙏💐
If we raise our voice for inheritance then people will say she is not raised properly As a girl
Parents will never take the words if a girl raise a voice bcz they also followed same dowry rule and they will continue that for the rest of their life
But, that’s exactly what we need to standup against! Demand for your rights!
@@sailakshmi7626 Then, take stand for yourself instead of simply cribbing about the wrongdoings. You are also the part of the society. So, bring the change that is needed. All the best !! 👍
Being a girl its better to create our own life and then fight legally because these mentality needs a tough fight.... So be it .
You’re right when you talk about inheritance your parents start seeing you as greedy beings out there to rob them. Bollywood culture has also contributed to this paranoia by showing that after distribution of wealth parents are thrown out by their children. Only those children who give up their rights are worthy.
Such a wonderful speech,it goes not only to brain but at the end to heart.
Wow, truly inspiring! Is it any wonder that her son is Vikram Seth, writer extraordinaire?
this video need to be dubbed in all regional languages of india
Yessss!
I appreciate you because instead of just 'Hindi' you have added all the "regional languages" 🙏
Every language in Asia, actually....
Oh dear sister, what a loving appeal to all!! It shows your love for all. One famous Indian saint said,
"Love All whom he loves."
You just did that in action, in these loving, touching, and kind words. May God be with you always and guide all of us further!
My heart cried hearing your speech, I can't believe how my brother whom I never expected to cheat me could do it. But the bible says no one will go unpunished. I just praise the lord Jesus for righteousness n justice is the foundation of his throne
Brenda don't get disheartened. Did u study in a convent in Gujarat?
It's all fine to use religion but why not use law?
That is a true liberated woman standing tall wearing her Indian and marital identity with pride and with no apology. She doe not need to burn her bra to prove her equal standing with men; it can be achieved with much grace and dignity.
Everyday I learn something new. I hope the new generation break that habit , we are living in a new world. Let us educate, educate & educate It will make a difference.
Good point, we need to educate them and bring awareness.I didn't get any inheritance more dowry was paid. Forced marriage which ended up in divorce. parents distance me the day after my marriage. I like to inspire women through my book Mila Rising, if I can make it, you can too!
Madam,
First of all,let me give you a standing ovation!..You are really a fine human being.Your speech was mesmerizing and I listened to it as l would listen to a beautiful poem...I hope the ideas you were trying to put across would reach more people and bring about the change
that we all need so badly.
Hats off to you and I appreciate your efforts!...
These days groom should be put to shame if he keeps silent on demands put by his family during marriage on brides family.Even demand for 3 day marriage in the name of tradition is a shameful thing.
Absolutely!
@@ramanipalle-swaraamrutham7229
This is huge problem that so called parent’s boy an Munna’s are not boys when they are taking dowery. They are worse than animals. Try to be human for the mother who gave you a birth.
Our so called society is no longer society that they demand such rules of dowery.
It’s a greed. Pure Greed, that has grown in men’s blood. Women have to step up to stop this. Which will change the thinking of so called society.
True sir ...
In in of my niece marriage helplessly watching. There is no dowry, but they want! Marriage on 3 days grand scale. Bride family reduced to entertainer as well as sponsors of entertainers for not just groom family.But to their relatives and friends as well!!
@@pushpakathpal7812 You're absolutely right, Pushpa ji! And I have already put forward my idea within my family that neither am I going to set up my son for sale, since he is invaluable, not valueless, nor am I going to buy my sons-in-law who also cannot be valued against a sum of money. These are pure relationships that we are going to build with love as the current, not bargains that we decide upon against currency.
What a captivating orator. God bless xx
We are 2 daughters and I was rejected by many only because I upfront told the boy that I am against dowry and would not give a pit.but I assure that I will be contributing myself by working as I have been given a good education. As wished by God I got a perfect better half who respected my decision. So it's the change in us we must bring inspite of parental or societal demands.. and that has to be respected by our parents and others.
I think that may be the only way to change things, respectable and successful women refusing to marry anyone who asks for a dowry and making it a shameful act that no decent woman will tolerate.
Are you going to inheritance your father property? Both are money involved right.
I'm so happy to read this!
Her speech got me into tears.. commendable thoughts!!!! I appreciate the fact that such ladies are still trying to help society change their minds about dowry and most importantly fathers inheritance.. After all why a daughter should be insecure about her own future!
That's what an empowered woman looks like. Take note people!
What a speech! Spellbound and eye opener to all the parents.I come from a family of 2 brothers and 7 sisters. My father divided his property into three equal parts and gave my brothers their share and wrote a Will to give his share to all 7 daughters but unfortunately my mother after my father’s death did not want any of the daughters to get a single penny and fully supported my brothers to occupy my fathers properties.Till today we are fighting in courts from 1998.
You have a chance to show your spouse and children what is right. Too bad about your mom.
Very true, girls just want equal status and they prove how much they can do for both the families. From childhood itself we should treat girl with respect and dignity. Allow and involve her in making decisions for family and herself, and see how much she will care for you in your old age.
She is such a great motivation to society. Whatever time it is we should stand against injustice towards us, be confident and make persistent efforts towards ones ideal life. Don't let anyone belittle you. And also keep in mind that not all people in this world have crooked thoughts. There are both good and bad people.
One of the best example and experience of women empowerment 👏👏👏
I just married for six months with no dowry system n my inlaws are caring me just like a kid I'm so much lucky n my husband loves me the most
Yes, absolutely, it's the mindset of parents, brothers and sisters which need to change.
Here, here, .....WELL SAID!! I am the fourth girl in a family of 5 siblings - 4 girls and 1 brother (the youngest); my father has already signed off our family home inheritance, to my brother and we live in the UK, lol, this is one of the reasons, why I will always be the rebel of the family, as we grew up believing my brother dropped down from the heavens as a God, however, us girls were not seen as Lakshmi and have been treated like second class citizens, compared to our youngest sibling - the brother. It is a sad truth and one which my parents will not readily admit, but, it's that old fashioned Indian mentality and if I had a daughter of my own, I would brake this karmic pattern and ensure she knew, that she was a Divine Goddess, a Devi with the Shakti to master her own destiny. Namaste, love and light Dear Leila, many thanks for sharing!
That happens in the USA, too. My own brother tried to coerce my father to change his will and trust after our mother died...until I stood up for myself and my sister.
Golden words, very heart touching talk .....blessed to be born in such a family which gave equality in inheritance.
Excellent speech made by u mam.a women should stand on her leg so that she doesn't want to depend on her husband or her brother for all her needs in life.we should eradicate this dowry system so that we can save many lives of women. We have to make and give a strong punishments the injustice against women. I proud of you mam 👏👏👏👌.
She's an inspiration, truly. I've never heard someone put these thoughts into words so beautifully and effortlessly. I really wish more people listened to what she has to say. I must admit, sometimes I genuinely feel like this country has nothing but a grey future but people like her are the reason give me hope.
My uncle (dad’s brother) tried to force my mother to give up her share of the property when my dad passed away. My mother stood her ground. I am so proud of her. Clearly no one was around to support her. And today the same moochers try to milk out of her whatever they can when they can.
Please tell her good wishes from Canada. I'm glad she showed you what she did.
Wow such a powerful speech! I wish her wish comes through for the daughters of India
I lost my dad at age of 13, I had a 1.5year old sister at that time...my father's family abandoned us..my father had not made much property by then.. we did not have anything.. my mother's family agreed to take care of us...now after 15 years they took all my mother's earnings and they are not willing to give us my mother's share also.. what is the value of girl child in this country??? Even if my mother goes legally and flights she might get property but she will get a big title that she is selfish and stole her brothers rights.. instead I believe in earn your property and don't depend on any one... specially when you are born as girl in this country..it's a sin asking for property!!!
It's not a sin to ask for what is yours. It is a sin to not ask for what is yours and to give heed to what others say.
It's really sad to hear your story. It's really horrible the ways of the old culture about bias between sons n daughters. Hope there will be a law that dictates equality between male n female. By the way, I'm a guy writing this. 😄
We suffer the same problem in Muslim Arab countries, from Algeria
@@v.ar1234 since 2005 daughter have equal property rights
Meaningful and inspiring speech. Her attire ,simplicity, knowledge achievements are great
You're a role model to everyone mam
A ray of hope for girls of all centuries !!
All fades away! But the courage that comes with standing for your beliefs stays. Always. What a woman! What a great life led!!!🙌
I am grateful for this universe for giving me an amazing mother who made me understand that such great thinking patterns as madam leila seith is generated at home simply by the way you are treated. girls need to be treated as strong humans not as a bunch of humans wanting attention and support from males all the time.
This is such an inspiring video. My mother is also struggling to get her ancestral property rights in Jaipur city. Her brother and his wife tortures and harasses her a lot. Still she raised her voice, fighting in court since Sept 2021 and due to threat of her life took police help.
Please tell her I send her success from Canada.
Why is no one talking on how she so perfectly alluded to her son's (Vikram Seth) novel A Suitable Boy in her speech. 👏
Because there are FAR more important things to be talked about than just a mere allude to her son's book.😇
@@vaisha1i so true
Damn! I had no idea that Vikram Seth is her son. The whole family is dope
Wow! What a speech. I felt every word she said. It’s people like her who change the world.
It's her and the people who hear her and act, who change the world.
कमल औरात है! सही है। शुक्रिया इस बात के लिए। उम्मीद है की सब कुछ बदल जाएगा एक दिन।
i am now clear about my decision regarding this inheritance of property issue.Thank you madam for guiding all women of India.
No words to say 👏👏👏👏
But only one thing is distrubing me through out her (long) speech, she is standing. At the age of 80+ they could have given chair for her while giving speech.
I agree but she is a strong woman
She probably refused one because she is a strong and proud woman!!!!
Healthy and happy ageing - active
Wow, this woman is 84? What a sharp mind and lovely soul.
She is such an inspiration to all ..RIP such a great soul 🙏🙏🙏
After hearing this...i feel really lucky...i am a single girl child of my parents...yet my parents never raised me under any kind of stereotype...and they support me in every way they can so that i may study well and succeed in my life...my parents say that I am their fixed investment 😅😅 and that i would fulfill all their wishes they have...and i would surely do it....!!! Many of our neighbours used to ask my mother what would you do after she is married...you dont have a son....then my mother used to tell them that 'i dont care if i dont have a son...my daughter will take care of me'....and my parents always tell me.... achieve ur dream and show the world what a girl can do.....
I AM SO LUCKY...I AM PROUD OF MY PARENTS.... 😍
Same story here
My mother took care of her ailing mother on her own and my father supported her. Her brother only visited our house when she died to take care of her last rites. Better to not have sons if they are like my uncle.
Leilaji so adamant and firm - a true role model you are to the world! I am lucky being a Chitrapur Saraswat Brahmin - we have never had any dowry tradition!
My parents amd in my inlaws never taken or given dowry in our wedding. I'm proud of the culture they practised.
A lot of people speak at the Tedx but only a few touches heart and she is one of them 😍
Amazing speech Ma'am Leila, really inspirational...you really had a good mother and a good family to be part of your life...
The aura she have and the confidence she carries is just incredible ....❤️❤️❤️ .