The best thing I've learnt is to work with and around my 'flaws' rather than assuming that tomorrow I'll wake up and suddenly be cleaner, more productive, procrastinate less etc. E.g., for ages I'd tidy my dresser by neatly lining all the products up and putting everything back in drawers/on shelves. But there's no way I'm doing that after getting ready in a rush in the morning. Now I have a big bowl on my dresser, which means I can basically still drop everything after using it, but at least it's all self-contained and looks neater. Same with reading. I used to read loads and I've tried building the habit back in, but its always the first thing to slip as soon as I'm busy/tired/stressed. On the other hand, I always have my headphones in, so listening to an audiobook is a much more organic change for me to make and I've been able to 'read' a lot more. There's lots more examples I could think of, but hopefully you get the idea! Work with yourself and don't hold yourself to such high standards
Omg yes, I love the phrase you used: working _with_ your "flaws." I definitely spent a lot of time when I was younger being like ok, I'm gonna change and one day I'll just be a cleaner, more organized person and now I'm like ok that's never gonna happen so how can I adjust my habits to the way my brain is wired? Making that shift truly helps so much, thank you for sharing this tip!
This is so important!!! I've always been a shy, awkward person, and it was like a goal of mine to stop that. To become THE social butterfly. And this was an awful idea. My social anxiety was crippling -- I would be so angry at myself for stuttering or not making eye contact or telling a joke that didn't land. I was so distressed that I wasn't a charismatic social butterfly. Eventually, I decided to give up on that idea. I was like, "Why not work WITH the fact that I'm shy instead of trying to correct it?" AND LIFE WAS SO MUCH BETTER. I stop punishing myself for those awkward tendencies and welcomed them as part of my personality. The social anxiety went away because I wasn't punishing myself (which made it easier to talk to people actually) And overall working "with" my shyness just improved my social life.
My favorite thing about this video, is the fact that you're just living your life while you're filming. You aren't showing us a perfect background while talking about how you struggle, you're existing while doing content creation - and for ME, that is very comfy cozy, and I love that.
@@asmolyeti6689 maybe just try listing out what your ideal morning routine would look like, with some self care steps (exercise, cleaning, meditation, etc) added and then think of that list as a menu instead of a step-by-step required plan!
Dearest Morgan - I am so moved by your video. As a 59 year old woman, I wish I could have seen this when I was 25. I know it would have been so meaningful and helpful. I'm sure other commentors have said this same thing: it does not change. I still wait to "grow up" and "have my life together." I want to tell you that what you are doing right now, these habits you are cultivating, is the single biggest self-care act-of-love you can do. I try not to have regret about my past and stay focused on the present. There is still so much for a 59 year old woman to look forward to, right? :-) Wishing you all the best, Lisa
My biggest change was simplifying my routines. I felt so overwhelmed just by the concept of a 10-step shower routine, a 15-step morning routine, or a 8-step skincare routine. So by simplifying things to the bare necessities made my life so much easier.
Please do your research before recommending better help.. there is SO many people out there that have been affected by better help in a very negative way and it is honestly disheartening that creators are still taking sponsorships from them and recommending them to their audience.
I totally agree, but I’ll say this… When I first did therapy on BetterHelp, my first two counselors were amazing but I realized I needed a specialized type of therapy but the therapists on BetterHelp that “specialized” in what I was needing help on were not that helpful nor were they the most available or reliable. After that experience, I came to the conclusion that talk therapy (while it’s super helpful for a lot of people) is not the best treatment modality for me and decided to look into an ADHD coach. While it is awesome that BetterHelp has made talk therapy and counseling more accessible through virtual sessions, there are other therapies, websites, courses, etc that may provide what someone is looking for. Talk therapy isn’t necessarily a one size fits all solution.
@@lindaguthrie8238 I’m sure BetterHelp has good therapists, but the 3 that I tried were dreadful. One was just never available, always changing the available slots, so I paid for nothing. Another was very dismissive of my issues, talked mostly about herself, and relied exclusively on worksheets that I was to fill out entirely on my own and she didn’t even want to review them with me. A third was downright nasty, doesn’t believe in adult ADHD in general, even though I had been diagnosed in childhood and am currently on medication with a psychiatrist, and when I sought help with executive dysfunction issues, told me that I was just not being a responsible adult and I had to “get over myself”. I can’t even imagine how she treats people with PTSD or severe depression. I spent thousands of dollars and was left in tears multiple times. Never again.
My "counselor" or whatever at betterhelp literally started crying and said "damn, how did you live through that? I don't even know what to tell you. I need to end this session" Needless to say I asked for my money back (and it was an absolute fight to get it) and never used that service again. Apparently the training is minimal at best, and not everyone is a certified counselor or therapist.
Checking in as a 42 year-old and can confirm that you will never fully feel like things are together - but you're ahead of the curve with these habits! Personally going to adopt skincare by candlelight and I love the menu idea as someone who also struggles with the morning routine and feelings of defeat when I don''t "get it right." Thanks for putting this out into the world!
At first i was like "ugh another productivity guru who's going to recite atomic habits", but your tips were actually genuine and realistic for people like me who are struggling with anxiety. Also the last bit about your conversation with your therapist (living for future you instead of present you) resonated with me quite a lot. Thanks for sharing your experience, new subscriber!
Its such a good advise to stop thinking you will one day have everything together. There will always be something and that makes you not enjoy what you have now. Like those people that work really really hard to earn a lot of money for retirement but miss their childrens entire childhood because they were always working. We should stay in the now and enjoy what we have
As a gamer girly I set it all up as "Daily quests" and "Weekly quests" 😊 And then I have a list of side quests, the stuff I can do if a feel like I have enough energy. It can be stuff that I have thought about but is not a necessity or urgent (like changing the curtains or buying something that I think will improve my home etc.)😄
@@strxwbxrry.x5346 I don't know what app the original commenter meant, but Finch is great! It gives you rewards for accomplishing your tasks and it's insanely cute
@@shadowblackheart7556 Sounds good - can you share which app worked for you? I get inundated by a lot of different ones, but some seem better than others. I am paralysed by finding the right one and making the decision to stick to one!
I also share a fear of people looking at my laptop screen in cafes even though it's nothing incriminating, so much so that I would leave the cafe if I couldn't find a private spot against the wall. I told my boyfriend about this and he said "Why don't you just get a privacy screen?" I didn't even know that was an option! So I looked them up and it's just a plastic screen you can magnet onto your laptop and it obscures everything unless you're looking at the screen straight on. If someone is sitting next to you or slightly off to the side behind you, the screen looks completely black to them. It's life changing!
That's super cool and I have to say it would give me an absolute chuckle to think there would absolutely be people around wracking their brains on why I'm staring at s black screen 😂
@@mordecaiissad8529Haha yea I may look insane but at least I can write my smoochin scenes in peace! I know a lot of students in medical school use them too for studying in public because they have to look at graphic textbook images
Working outside the home works well, typically, for people with adhd and autism symptoms because the break from home not only gives you permission to focus on work but also limits the distractions being at home can cause. You’re not distracted by chores or pets or video games or other random daily things that are “your responsibility” when at home.
Very practical video! Another small tip that has helped me manage the mess - never leave a room empty handed. There's always something that doesn't beling in the room you're currently in.
High fives are ❤ I use the fine china , crystal and silver....I recently went into remission from Hodgkins Lymphoma when I was diagnosed I thought " ok this could be the end, why have I been saving these things for only "special" occasions ? I am the occasion!!!"
Thank you so much for saying this. I have this horrible habit of saving everything for a special occasion. It’s gotten to the point where I get bad anxiety over the smallest things and feel like I should be saving stuff for “later”. Like even food! It’s something that I’ve been working really hard to break. You saying “I am the occasion” resonates with me so much. I will keep that in mind so it can help remind me to use the stuff now instead of saving it for some “special” reason or day that might not ever come. 🖤 And congratulations on going into remission! 🥰
Yay. I've been raised by my parents to have pretty high standards and I don't really want to blame them for it, because it has served me well being disciplined, but lo and behold, I've also become very incredibly demanding for myself as a result, up to the point where I'm actually doing really good but I'm still criticising myself. It's definitely a growth process and I don't like people who are self-indulgent but I also realise it's okay to be nice to myself from time to time.
Hi, 40 here, I'm thinking I'll have it sorted out by 45. But this time... I mean it! Just do the thing now. Do the things you want to do instead of talking about doing them whenever you "feel ready" or "after I lose weight" or "when I'm rich". I'm on my 3rd life crisis, but I feel more confidently heading into the resolution half of that narrative. :)
when I turned 30 last year I had quit my phd program at a time when most people are relieved to be done with coursework and the “fun” part is around the corner. I committed to artistic pursuits and it was scary because up until then I had spent my whole life excelling academically or whatever. My therapist and I had a chat recently, as you did with yours, about the anxiety I was having thinking I should just go back to school or join the “workforce.” She didn’t waste a moment to remind me that I don’t have to right now bcos I can cover my expenses AND taking the path of least resistance wouldn’t make me nearly as happy as I am now 💛
Good for you!! I read in a book once that your brain craves the familiar so whenever you do anything "different" even if it's good for you, it'll try to get you to go back to the familiar (in your case, school) but when you feel that happening it's important to resist (if it is of course a rational decision haha) because that's they only way you'll be able to achieve the things you really want / are afraid of. So all that to say, keep going, I'm rooting for you!
About BetterHelp, I had no idea there were discrepancies. I used them in 2021 or so and while I had no serious problems with the therapist, she definitely broke confidentiality and was very clear that she knew she was doing so. Other than that sponsorship, wonderful and relatable video as I get out of my 3rd(?) life crisis at 26.
@@nickorange4881 A family member and I were using the same therapist at separate times to help us with our relationship. The therapist told me things that she wasn't supposed to, but told me "don't tell". I couldn't report her without it being obvious I knew things I wasn't supposed to.
@@nickorange4881 A family member and I were using the same therapist at separate appointment times to help us overcome our issues. The therapist told me things I wasn't supposed to know, essentially telling me that family member lied to me. The way she said it was in a "don't tell" sort of way. I didn't report her because I was in crisis, but I wish I had.
I like the mountain analogy. Even if it feels like everything is crumbling and the shakes keep on keeping on, the mountain is still... there. And when you take a step back, yeah it's beautiful, and it still stands.
Im only 22 but i relate. I thought “ill have it together by 14, 16, 18…” never got it together. The routine has been a big thing for me. I have PDA autism so getting myself to do tasks can be extremely difficult. Now i just try to do things when i remember to with no pressure bc if i feel the pressure i wont do it. Hopefully by 25 some of the things i can only do every other day will be every day but rn its okay that its just when i can do it. Also loved the high five.
I love the morning menu idea. That’s how I get myself to workout. I’d doesn’t matter what I do, it’s only important that I do something. If I don’t feel like weight lifting or running, k can do yoga. If I am not able to do 1h, I can just do 15min. Everything counts. We should be nice to ourselves:)
exactly! I often experience "perfection paralysis" where if I don't think I can do something perfectly, I won't do it at all. It's helpful to remind myself that doing something is better than doing nothing, even if it's not perfect. especially for things like exercise, or learning a new skill !
Wow, I needed this video. When I'm struggling in keeping my life together, I tend to imagine the "future me" as lost as I am, and I'm trying to help them. (by preparing my food or clothes for tomorrow, as a good people pleaser as I am). "Future me" is always grateful for the help of the "past me".
"if I wanna look hot and prosper, I gotta do it" deadass a similar mindset has kept me going consistently for like. four years now? with exercise like sometimes I suffer a mental break and I slip, but I always come back to it also- the high-five was very fun, it actually made me laugh
I'm turning 30 this year and for my entire life, I hated working out. My therapist suggested doing exercises that I would have done when playing as a child. I always loved to swim, like my parents would have to bribe me to get me out of the lake, so the fact that I never thought to go swimming as physical activity (or my parents never suggested it when we had so many fights about my weight) is kinda embarrassing 😅 I usually set a goal (kinda a new years resolution but less strict) and my goal this year is to finally take control of my skin, at (almost) 30 I still have terrible acne, so I'm talking to a dermatologist in a couple weeks to start that goal 😊
Amazing goal! Skin troubles are so difficult, so be kind to yourself, it'll probably take a lot of experimenting, but I'm rooting for you. 😊. Love the exercise tip too - finding something fun is so important!
The therapist thing is so true !!!! I want to the therapist because I had a full on crisis after my breakup, and once I got out of the crisis he told me "now that you're feeling better when can start working on yourself, before I was just there to hold your hand but it's now that the real work begins" and it makes so much sense !
I think in the end we have to find a balance between caring for us now and caring for us in the future. Like retirement savings are important but also being happy now is important
It's refreshing to find someone who gives life advice that isn't either a full-time content creator, still a student in their early 20s, or someone who seems to never have had any mental health struggles at all. I recognised myself in a lot of your struggles and realised that I'm already trying to do many of these habits myself but just need to stick to them more. So as a 25-year-old trying to cope with an anxiety disorder, I thank you for this reassurance that I'm doing better in my life than my brain likes to convince me I am.
I don’t know if this will reach you, but I’ve recently lost someone close to me and have been really going through it. The high-five through the screen genuinely made me cry, maybe I’m just emotional but thank you for making me smile today. ❤
I unconsciously started a routine of colouring on my iPad before bed each night- it started just because I wanted to colour one night, and now I have my colouring and a RUclips video on pretty much every night. It’s a nice way to satisfy my brain’s incessant urge for screen time while also doing something calming and mindful. I’ve also found that rearranging my bedroom to better define the two spaces (bed and working area, I live with my parents still) has allowed me to switch off more effectively and spend less time staring at the tiny screen across the room because now I can’t actually even see it properly
The menu thing sounds really fun to try! I’m a neurodivergent brain so finding things that work can be nuts. One recommendation for excercise I got was not to do an excercise routine but rather just find movement to do day to day/incorporating it into your daily tasks. Like “I need to go pick up this thing from the store let’s walk to the store then bus back” or another day you do a funny dance for 30 minutes.
Yeah that’s a really good tip! I don’t run much anymore but back when I used to I would literally run to Target if I needed to get something and then take the bus back just like you said. And it felt so productive bc I was both getting exercise and getting errands done. Really satisfied the brain hahah
Woah why is watching another person be real and imperfect and anxious and still be taking care of themselves so healing? I need to stop hustling my self care it's so counterproductive. Subscribed. ❤
I just want to point out that watching you clean around while you talk gives the video a somewhat welcoming and amicable vibe 🥺 thank you for sharing your perspective on quarter life crises
i think one of the biggest blessings in your late twenties and early thirties is figuring out what works for you, no shame attached. thanks for sharing these tips with us
As a skin picker in arms with you, I am TOTALLY gonna try that candle trick! It's those overhead bright lights that make me examine every little pore on my entire face, and I've never thought of just doing my skincare/night routine in dimmer light lol 😂
lol right?! I should technically wear glasses due to fading eye sight but when I do wear them I try to not look in a mirror, because then I start focusing in on all the imperfections I never noticed when not wearing my glasses! Gah it’s frustrating!
This was a great watch. Thanks so much. I'm 28, and I'm super mass-crumbling internally, even though externally, I mainly just need to find a full time job. The pandemic and some family issues a few years ago really plunged me into depression and burnout, but I'm also an overachiever/perfectionist by nature, so it's been really hard to accept myself for not having things together.
I started watching this video because I always liked this kind of content, but 10 seconds in I had an epiphany- I kinda have my life together! I live on my own, I’m studying at a great academy with full support from my parents, I’m forming relationships with so many people, I’m able to take care of myself without worrying, eating, cleaning… I’ve spent so many years roaming in the dark, after really bad traumatic events, going through an addiction, and I worked on myself, I knew I was happy lately, I was yet to realize how much I was actually able to accomplish. And okay, now I’m crying- but it’s because I’m happy, little me would’ve never guessed where we are now, but she deserved every glimpse of happiness we have right now and WOW, this got deep fast- I’ll still watch the video to support and to know what it says but thank you very much for gifting me this quite random eye opening moment❤
So this the first video I'm watching from your channel, I accidentally stumbled here. And I've actually heard every one of these habits before, but STILL I ended up watching till the very end and feeling so comforted by this video... probably because of how natural and organic this feels: finally a creator who isn't showing a picture perfect frame in the background while talking. I loved seeing you go about, doing your normal things and talking to the camera as though it's just a friend in the room. Subscribed 🧡
I watch a lot of videos “like” this on here and randomly today I was recommended yours. This was the first video I’ve ever watched that actually HELPED me. I am 40, and I’m feeling so lost with mental health and routines (a constant routine failure). Everything you said spoke to me. Thank you for putting this out into the universe!!
1:53 Nah the analogy works perfectly if the mountain is volcanic. People without chronic mental illnesses/neurodivergence are mountains like the Rockies where small pebbles, boulders, and maybe the odd traumatic landslide happen. Aaaand some of us are Mount St. Helens and when things shift half of our life is gone and we’ve been permanently changed forever. Or the pressure keeps building up inside and know we are at risk of exploding. Honestly it’s an amazing analogy, one I’m definitely going to use with my family.
I found this video very helpful because it doesn’t put pressure on yourself… it basically not self sabotaging your process. I have a bad habit of self sabotaging myself by not doing X thing… etc. And getting overwhelmed by things accumulating. I will look into these recommendations.
That puzzle comment really has me thinking. I think that’s most of the problem for me. I look at everything as a problem that needs solved, including myself. I’ve worked so so hard to the point that it’s impacted my health, and surprise… it’s never enough! Thank you for the video. I think this will help a lot of people. ❤
A habit that has helped me so much when it comes to organizing my massive closet is picking a random article of clothing every day to base my outfit off of. If I can’t make an outfit out of it, it’s given away!
I guess what i would offer as my own strategy is accepting that things take time. Dreams and life projects can take months or years, it can take half an hour to get a task done that might take someone else two minutes, it can take a full three days of rest, even if it feels uncomfortable to not be as busy, to recover enough to face down another week. Sleep and the brain cleaning and healing itself through that takes time. You can’t smoosh every little thing into your calendar, things just take time.
I’m 18. Med student. My life is crumbling. I feel like I found myself through you. Lots of love- m and yesss do not leave your therapy because I also did that during senior year and my life got better and then it got way worse
Hey, you don't know me, but your comment made me just want to say that I hope things are better for you. Med school is probably rough, and I pray that the good things outweigh the bad things!
@@elletee9183 hey, i was struggling a lot when i wrote that comment, i finished finals and now i am waiting for results, basically whether i passed or not... stressful! but i have hope and things are better now, thank u so much for your kindness. we need more people like u! i hope ur life is going well right now
I'm such a serious person it's hard to genuinely make me smile or laugh, specially through videos but this video made my day, I haven't smiled this much by myself in a while, thank you
Man im so glad i clicked on this vid. Not only is this relatable and helpful as a young adult entering the real world, but you're so engaging and fun to listen to. Keep it up! You're a diamond in the rough
I LOVE the representation!! FINALLY someone online who shows how they're supporting themselves with anxiety. I TOTALLY feel you thank you so much for this. I feel like the advice from health professionals is so fecking tone deaf when it comes to mood disorders. How tf am i gonna get up and do exercise if I feel like I'm going to do it wrong or i cant stick to it or i cant do it at all? I love this. Thanks so much for sharing❤❤
Exactly! That’s why people need support and representation of people at every stage of something. Especially mood/anxiety disorders. It’s nice to see someone who’s overcome it but you also need to be able to see someone else who is at the same stage as you who you can relate to and not in a way that makes you compare yourself. I think mental health professionals are still needed to be an objective party and plant the seed of the idea “exercise helps” but you still need “proof” in the person who is over the hump and confirms that exercise helps and the person who is struggling with you to brainstorm ideas that work for you specifically. Sometimes a lot of seeds are planted (the professional), but nothing will grow if not watered (the co-struggler) and given the proper nutrients (the person who provided “proof”). In the end, a lot is up to you and your environment but having support at all stages is a part of success. Sorry if my analogy got out of hand! I wish you the best of luck and happiness on your journey!
I really needed to hear the last one. My last job was a “well paying stable job” but I was SO STRESSED it made me absolutely hate my life so I changed jobs despite it paying less. I was significantly happier initially but I’m currently in a state of questioning those decisions as it’s unstable and pays less and I’m questioning whether that was the wrong thing to do especially when I think about my future, to the point of almost regretting my decisions. But thinking back to just how unhappy and stressed I was, I tell myself it’s what I needed at the time.
Wow. I usually hate these types of videos because with my severe ADHD every advice seem impossible. But these advice look really helpful. I will attempt to try those. Thank you very much!
Really helped when I excepted that my best is all I can give. By definition, it is all you got. So, if I can honestly say I’m doing my best then my mind can be quiet and accept itself
I love that! I had a professor who used to say "there will be days where 'doing your best' is just getting out of bed and that's ok". I try to remember that on days where I feel like I'm not doing enough.
I am old enough to be your mother and I loved this video! Super ideas! Especially making decisions for today. I missed out on a lot as I considered the future too much. And I also high-fived the screen 😜.
Wow, you took the words right out of my mouth! Surprise, this is her mother! Yes, loved the positive journal as well, focusing and looking back at positive thoughts will help you in the negative times🥰👏👏👏👏
Damn I started watching this video as just background noise, didn't expect to tear up at the end. As someone who is constantly chasing a "perfect" way to live life but often gets overwhelmed in the process, this resonated with me so much holy shit
Why does 80% of your advices make total sense!? Like, even going to the gym without a routine would just make me feel like quitting... or how much I hate the biiggg Sunday resets!! Love it when I can relate to someone!
I am coming across this video during a really big life change that makes me feel like I need to do some big shifts in my day-to-day routine and operations to avoid spiraling as I navigate the situation. Taking this advice feels a lot easier than some other larger creators. Excited to continue to see videos from you in the future. :)
I JUST found you today - watched this video and the ending has me in tears. I uprooted my life a year and a half ago and moved across the country. I have struggled since the holidays last year. I found myself in a corporate job that i genuinely don’t hate but something hasn’t felt right. I left full time photography work to find myself for the first time not knowing what I truly want to do. These tips tricks and reminders really spoke to me today. I really appreciate you 💗💗💗
Menus instead of routine, really resonate with me. I will have to try implementing it with exercise. I´m also someone who hates cleaning and can´t time manage it realistically. But recently I have started dividing the cleaning chores into 3 categories: red, yellow and green. Where the color denotes how important the chore is. I repeat the same chores each week, but it doesn´t matter which day I do them.
Wow- I am so glad to hear you mention feeling like you have nothing to talk about in therapy, I get so anxious about not having anything to bring up in therapy, but I am always happy I went afterwards. I just found your channel, and I love your energy and honesty.
Oh wow, I didn't realize I needed this. You remind me a lot of myself through my 20s (and the reflections of what I thought my life would be like in my teens.) I'm 30. One of the things that really gets me and paralyzes me is the uncertainty of "what if that isn't the right choice based on where I might be or what I want in life later on" And I think I really needed to hear "live for current me, not 50 year old me" so THANK you. I'm new to your channel, you've gained a new sub. :)
Girl, felt like you were talking straight to my soul. Thank you for putting all these thoughts into words, feel like I've been feeling these things but not articulating them well. Love an organized queen!! Fr tho, I feel like we would get along!! I'm doing this passion project where I interviewing people aged 5 - 95 (90 interviews haha if that makes sense), and would love to interview you as my 27 year old :) (or 28 I can't remember which you said haha)
I also have a junk journal scrapbook for my little adventures! It is honestly one of my favorite hobbies ever! I also recently started a task list and every week I’ll assign one task to each day! It helps a lot. And sometimes my thing assigned to the day is just running an errand or even a more fun activity I’m behind on like journaling. I’m glad to see another anxious girlie doing the same activities as I am! It makes them feel more justifiable to myself!🤣
I feel like I finally hit the bottom of life burn out the last few months. Recently, I'm finally getting some traction back on the road to motivation and I found myself doing a lot of these tips and they 100% do help and hearing your opinions and how they help you is just reenforcement that I'm going to be okay and I'm doing the right things. Thank you for cutting the weeds off my path, this video helped me a lot today ♡
10:03 Eleni was actually the youtuber that got me into working out. I started with her 30min cardio work outs and I got so excited and happy about it that I would miss exercising more. I ended up getting into Chloe Ting challenges and on a resting day I do Eleni's cardios.
100% yes to the candle/ soft bathroom light! I kind of accidentally started doing that because I often procrastinated my night time shower until it was very late and I dreaded the harsh bathroom light in my windowless bathroom. So I took my portable bedside lamp, turned the light to yellow/orange and took that to the bathroom with me and I loved how that loft lighting helped me feel beautiful so now that’s what I do when I shower, sometimes when I go to the bathroom at night…
I was born and raised up here, left for college, and then came back because COVID happened and my original plans went out the window. I’m glad they did because now I have a job and a house and a husband (he’s also an AA native but moved to the UP several years before we met). He lovingly calls our house “the cabin” since he loves our little slice of heaven. We do get road noise though since we’re pretty close to a highway.
This was so helpful! I'm currently in the mountain is imploding stage but realize that the mountain still stands at the end of the day. Growing up is so scary and uncertain but these tips helped me give myself grace and compassion. I love how real and honest you were about these things. Thank you ❤
Hey Morgan! I'm probably pretty late but your video just popped up on my recommendations. I just turned 26 the first week of June and I feel like this has been the worst year for me so far. On my birthday, I felt miserable and the lowest I had ever been. I saw how my peers were doing online and thought to myself how much better their lives unfolded. Professionally and socially and felt left out and stuck. I reflected on it for a while and realized I was having a quarter-life crisis. I felt like I had wasted my college years on a degree I didn't really like, I was neglecting my hobbies, and I feel like I may never evolve in my current field of work because I don't have the credentials to back it up. I've been in my current job for 5 years now and it has made me grow so much. I feel so privileged to be able to work with family and friends. But I still feel so....insufficient. I feel like I lack in so many ways (not materially). Your words in this video kind of put things in perspective for me and made me realize I was worrying about the wrong things. I also asked myself the questions your therapists pushed about the lifestyle you have now and realized I'm actually living pretty comfrotably. I was just focusing on the wrong things. Anyway. Thank you so much for sharing this with us. I really hope you'll consider posting content like this int he future. It really made me feel like I was not alone and that it's okay to be confused sometimes. Much love!
I used to HATE folding laundry. But I saw in a video or tiktok somewhere where if you pair something you hate with something you love, it makes a drastic difference. So now I put on a tv show or a RUclips video while I’m folding laundry and it makes it 100x easier. 🤗
I really appreciate you doing stuff while you're talking because I have a hard time paying attention when nothing is going on except someone talking. I was able to take in a lot more of your video. Thanks for sharing. You have some great ideas that I can definitely incorporate. The menu may be my new favorite thing.
This is so interesting. I think these videos alot are so "take what you need" I just watched this video two seconds ago of this guy saying to "work from home it's easy", and you saying "work outside of home, it's uplifting" is so interesting because it shows how different these perspectives and these circumstances could really work for certain people. Personally, do love working outside of home.
First time coming across your content and I love the style. It’s like you’re just having a little catch up with us while you go about your day. I love the idea of pairing skin care with something you love, I got into this routine too and it makes such a difference to how consistent I am with it.
this is the first video i have watched from you, thank you so much for being so honest about your experiences, i have never identified with someone's tiny little daily experiences this much before online! you are giving so many people comfort, inspiration and motivation thank you!
I feel seen with the working outside your home point. I talk to people about how I was in an alternative schooling program ever since 3rd grade, and they always get cheerful and say "Oh I'd kill for that! I wish I could've grown up in a school like that." Even when I talked to people who also used that schooling program, they said they loved it and I was being a pessimist or invalidating their enjoyment. I have and had ADHD and anxiety problems, and being stuck in my house 6 days a week with nothing but my thoughts, a pile of work that was inextricable from my regular life, and no extrinsic motivation was hell. So was adjusting when I started having responsibilities outside of my home.
I want to write a novel this year and I have a 9-5 so I have set up a routine where I write in the morning before work. It’s been one of the best things ever. I’m excited to get up and once I’ve finished my writing for the day, I feel like I’ve accomplished something big and it doesn’t matter if I do nothing else the whole day (which will probably never happen I’ll still do things). It’s a big boost of motivation first thing.
Omg. I found this video at the perfect time. We're so similar -- the skin picking, 12-3-30, impulse buying, trying to start a routine. I can't wait to try the tools you've suggested to dig myself out of this hole
It's been a while since a video resonated this much. You hit the nail on the head on every. single. anxious. thought. (and bad habit) I've been trying to deal with! I'll definitely be adopting your insight into my life. From an anxious 20-something to another, thank you!!
The best thing I've learnt is to work with and around my 'flaws' rather than assuming that tomorrow I'll wake up and suddenly be cleaner, more productive, procrastinate less etc.
E.g., for ages I'd tidy my dresser by neatly lining all the products up and putting everything back in drawers/on shelves. But there's no way I'm doing that after getting ready in a rush in the morning. Now I have a big bowl on my dresser, which means I can basically still drop everything after using it, but at least it's all self-contained and looks neater.
Same with reading. I used to read loads and I've tried building the habit back in, but its always the first thing to slip as soon as I'm busy/tired/stressed. On the other hand, I always have my headphones in, so listening to an audiobook is a much more organic change for me to make and I've been able to 'read' a lot more.
There's lots more examples I could think of, but hopefully you get the idea! Work with yourself and don't hold yourself to such high standards
Omg yes, I love the phrase you used: working _with_ your "flaws." I definitely spent a lot of time when I was younger being like ok, I'm gonna change and one day I'll just be a cleaner, more organized person and now I'm like ok that's never gonna happen so how can I adjust my habits to the way my brain is wired? Making that shift truly helps so much, thank you for sharing this tip!
I have the same problems too so thank you for this!
I feel this! And audiobooks have really helped me find my way back into the magic world of books :))
this is so incredibly helpful you've just changed my life
This is so important!!! I've always been a shy, awkward person, and it was like a goal of mine to stop that. To become THE social butterfly.
And this was an awful idea. My social anxiety was crippling -- I would be so angry at myself for stuttering or not making eye contact or telling a joke that didn't land. I was so distressed that I wasn't a charismatic social butterfly.
Eventually, I decided to give up on that idea. I was like, "Why not work WITH the fact that I'm shy instead of trying to correct it?"
AND LIFE WAS SO MUCH BETTER. I stop punishing myself for those awkward tendencies and welcomed them as part of my personality. The social anxiety went away because I wasn't punishing myself (which made it easier to talk to people actually)
And overall working "with" my shyness just improved my social life.
My favorite thing about this video, is the fact that you're just living your life while you're filming. You aren't showing us a perfect background while talking about how you struggle, you're existing while doing content creation - and for ME, that is very comfy cozy, and I love that.
YES!
yeah i completely agree. it’s like it was almost “proof” for me. like OH she’s being for real.
also like there’s so much variety in setting and i can stay focused without getting lost in my thoughts halfway the way thru the video
It truly makes it feel like you’re just chatting w a friend at their house. I’ve never felt more comfy & inspired at the same time 🥰
Agreed and I’ve never really seen a creator do it like this!
the idea of menus just maybe changed my life holy shit i need to start using that
right?! what a way to take things a day at a time and really honor how your brain and body are feeling that given morning
I completely agree
I would like to know how to make a menu and stuff tho
I really need one lol
@@asmolyeti6689 maybe just try listing out what your ideal morning routine would look like, with some self care steps (exercise, cleaning, meditation, etc) added and then think of that list as a menu instead of a step-by-step required plan!
the high 5 was very satisfying
I'm so glad 😊
It really was 😅
I loved it too
Right!? Why 😭
Same😂
Dearest Morgan - I am so moved by your video. As a 59 year old woman, I wish I could have seen this when I was 25. I know it would have been so meaningful and helpful. I'm sure other commentors have said this same thing: it does not change. I still wait to "grow up" and "have my life together." I want to tell you that what you are doing right now, these habits you are cultivating, is the single biggest self-care act-of-love you can do. I try not to have regret about my past and stay focused on the present. There is still so much for a 59 year old woman to look forward to, right? :-) Wishing you all the best, Lisa
another 59-er, her
i couldn't agree more
Beautifully said!
My biggest change was simplifying my routines. I felt so overwhelmed just by the concept of a 10-step shower routine, a 15-step morning routine, or a 8-step skincare routine. So by simplifying things to the bare necessities made my life so much easier.
Omg theres also the tip to "break up a big activities into a bunch of smaller steps" but looking at that overwhelms me so much, I'll shut down.
I jumped up to participate in that high 5 with a surprising amount of excitement
Yayy! I love the enthusiasm hahah
1:55 “I don’t think mountains implode on themselves.”
Don’t worry, in this analogy I am both the mountain and the fracking company.
Along with not living only for future you, I like to ask myself if future me would actually care or remember whatever I'm currently stressed about
I always ask myself "Will I remember this problem/situation/whatever in ten years ?" If the answer is "no" then it's not worth fussing about it !
as a fellow anxious 20-something who has been struggling with managing anxiety+adulthood, this video was just the most comforting watch
Aw that makes me happy-I’m so glad you enjoyed it 💛
Please do your research before recommending better help.. there is SO many people out there that have been affected by better help in a very negative way and it is honestly disheartening that creators are still taking sponsorships from them and recommending them to their audience.
Couldn’t agree more!
I totally agree, but I’ll say this… When I first did therapy on BetterHelp, my first two counselors were amazing but I realized I needed a specialized type of therapy but the therapists on BetterHelp that “specialized” in what I was needing help on were not that helpful nor were they the most available or reliable. After that experience, I came to the conclusion that talk therapy (while it’s super helpful for a lot of people) is not the best treatment modality for me and decided to look into an ADHD coach. While it is awesome that BetterHelp has made talk therapy and counseling more accessible through virtual sessions, there are other therapies, websites, courses, etc that may provide what someone is looking for. Talk therapy isn’t necessarily a one size fits all solution.
@@AuntieAlexandrahow?
@@lindaguthrie8238 I’m sure BetterHelp has good therapists, but the 3 that I tried were dreadful. One was just never available, always changing the available slots, so I paid for nothing. Another was very dismissive of my issues, talked mostly about herself, and relied exclusively on worksheets that I was to fill out entirely on my own and she didn’t even want to review them with me. A third was downright nasty, doesn’t believe in adult ADHD in general, even though I had been diagnosed in childhood and am currently on medication with a psychiatrist, and when I sought help with executive dysfunction issues, told me that I was just not being a responsible adult and I had to “get over myself”. I can’t even imagine how she treats people with PTSD or severe depression. I spent thousands of dollars and was left in tears multiple times. Never again.
My "counselor" or whatever at betterhelp literally started crying and said "damn, how did you live through that? I don't even know what to tell you. I need to end this session" Needless to say I asked for my money back (and it was an absolute fight to get it) and never used that service again. Apparently the training is minimal at best, and not everyone is a certified counselor or therapist.
Checking in as a 42 year-old and can confirm that you will never fully feel like things are together - but you're ahead of the curve with these habits! Personally going to adopt skincare by candlelight and I love the menu idea as someone who also struggles with the morning routine and feelings of defeat when I don''t "get it right." Thanks for putting this out into the world!
At first i was like "ugh another productivity guru who's going to recite atomic habits", but your tips were actually genuine and realistic for people like me who are struggling with anxiety. Also the last bit about your conversation with your therapist (living for future you instead of present you) resonated with me quite a lot. Thanks for sharing your experience, new subscriber!
Same!
My new HP laptop has a button on the keyboard that changes the screen to shield mode!!
Omg yes I’m so sick of hearing about Atomic Habits hahaha
Its such a good advise to stop thinking you will one day have everything together. There will always be something and that makes you not enjoy what you have now. Like those people that work really really hard to earn a lot of money for retirement but miss their childrens entire childhood because they were always working. We should stay in the now and enjoy what we have
As a gamer girly I set it all up as "Daily quests" and "Weekly quests" 😊
And then I have a list of side quests, the stuff I can do if a feel like I have enough energy. It can be stuff that I have thought about but is not a necessity or urgent (like changing the curtains or buying something that I think will improve my home etc.)😄
That's basically what I did, I downloaded an app for it tho and clicking 'goal complete' is always so satisfying.
@@shadowblackheart7556 what app??
@@strxwbxrry.x5346 I don't know what app the original commenter meant, but Finch is great! It gives you rewards for accomplishing your tasks and it's insanely cute
@@shadowblackheart7556 Sounds good - can you share which app worked for you? I get inundated by a lot of different ones, but some seem better than others. I am paralysed by finding the right one and making the decision to stick to one!
being 28 - i’ve definitely felt the “y’know.. maybe 40” 😂😂
update: 29 now and really trying to be more like “ you know, maybe 30” 😅
Im 38 and this though TERRIFIES ME lol
@@pppf_S hahaha yeah I'm like "...maybe 50?"
26 here and it felt so relatable 😂
i'm 40 so...bad news
@@RaineInChaos it's alright this helps everyone be more realistic that we literally can't be capable
I also share a fear of people looking at my laptop screen in cafes even though it's nothing incriminating, so much so that I would leave the cafe if I couldn't find a private spot against the wall. I told my boyfriend about this and he said "Why don't you just get a privacy screen?" I didn't even know that was an option! So I looked them up and it's just a plastic screen you can magnet onto your laptop and it obscures everything unless you're looking at the screen straight on. If someone is sitting next to you or slightly off to the side behind you, the screen looks completely black to them. It's life changing!
how cool!
That's super cool and I have to say it would give me an absolute chuckle to think there would absolutely be people around wracking their brains on why I'm staring at s black screen 😂
@@mordecaiissad8529Haha yea I may look insane but at least I can write my smoochin scenes in peace! I know a lot of students in medical school use them too for studying in public because they have to look at graphic textbook images
@londonfroglatte oh I would absolutely love them wracking their brain on what's going on 😅 I will have to look that up to buy some
Working outside the home works well, typically, for people with adhd and autism symptoms because the break from home not only gives you permission to focus on work but also limits the distractions being at home can cause. You’re not distracted by chores or pets or video games or other random daily things that are “your responsibility” when at home.
Very practical video! Another small tip that has helped me manage the mess - never leave a room empty handed. There's always something that doesn't beling in the room you're currently in.
Ooh I like that!
High fives are ❤
I use the fine china , crystal and silver....I recently went into remission from Hodgkins Lymphoma when I was diagnosed I thought " ok this could be the end, why have I been saving these things for only "special" occasions ? I am the occasion!!!"
Yesss you are the occasion! I love that. And congratulations on remission, that is so so so amazing 💛
Thank you so much for saying this. I have this horrible habit of saving everything for a special occasion. It’s gotten to the point where I get bad anxiety over the smallest things and feel like I should be saving stuff for “later”. Like even food! It’s something that I’ve been working really hard to break. You saying “I am the occasion” resonates with me so much. I will keep that in mind so it can help remind me to use the stuff now instead of saving it for some “special” reason or day that might not ever come. 🖤 And congratulations on going into remission! 🥰
Yay. I've been raised by my parents to have pretty high standards and I don't really want to blame them for it, because it has served me well being disciplined, but lo and behold, I've also become very incredibly demanding for myself as a result, up to the point where I'm actually doing really good but I'm still criticising myself. It's definitely a growth process and I don't like people who are self-indulgent but I also realise it's okay to be nice to myself from time to time.
Hi, 40 here, I'm thinking I'll have it sorted out by 45. But this time... I mean it!
Just do the thing now. Do the things you want to do instead of talking about doing them whenever you "feel ready" or "after I lose weight" or "when I'm rich".
I'm on my 3rd life crisis, but I feel more confidently heading into the resolution half of that narrative. :)
hopefully
I needed to hear this. I’ve waited to do things my entire life, and I’m not 26 and having a quarter life crisis about it.
I'm coming across this comment really late but wanted to say thank you for posting it, I needed to read it today
when I turned 30 last year I had quit my phd program at a time when most people are relieved to be done with coursework and the “fun” part is around the corner. I committed to artistic pursuits and it was scary because up until then I had spent my whole life excelling academically or whatever. My therapist and I had a chat recently, as you did with yours, about the anxiety I was having thinking I should just go back to school or join the “workforce.” She didn’t waste a moment to remind me that I don’t have to right now bcos I can cover my expenses AND taking the path of least resistance wouldn’t make me nearly as happy as I am now 💛
Good for you!! I read in a book once that your brain craves the familiar so whenever you do anything "different" even if it's good for you, it'll try to get you to go back to the familiar (in your case, school) but when you feel that happening it's important to resist (if it is of course a rational decision haha) because that's they only way you'll be able to achieve the things you really want / are afraid of. So all that to say, keep going, I'm rooting for you!
About BetterHelp, I had no idea there were discrepancies. I used them in 2021 or so and while I had no serious problems with the therapist, she definitely broke confidentiality and was very clear that she knew she was doing so. Other than that sponsorship, wonderful and relatable video as I get out of my 3rd(?) life crisis at 26.
She broke confidentiality? How? I never used it before. Did you report her ?
@@nickorange4881 A family member and I were using the same therapist at separate times to help us with our relationship. The therapist told me things that she wasn't supposed to, but told me "don't tell". I couldn't report her without it being obvious I knew things I wasn't supposed to.
@@nickorange4881 A family member and I were using the same therapist at separate appointment times to help us overcome our issues. The therapist told me things I wasn't supposed to know, essentially telling me that family member lied to me. The way she said it was in a "don't tell" sort of way. I didn't report her because I was in crisis, but I wish I had.
@@ericayaddow3906 Most decent therapist wouldn't even work with individuals who are related to each other.
I like the mountain analogy. Even if it feels like everything is crumbling and the shakes keep on keeping on, the mountain is still... there. And when you take a step back, yeah it's beautiful, and it still stands.
Im only 22 but i relate. I thought “ill have it together by 14, 16, 18…” never got it together. The routine has been a big thing for me. I have PDA autism so getting myself to do tasks can be extremely difficult. Now i just try to do things when i remember to with no pressure bc if i feel the pressure i wont do it. Hopefully by 25 some of the things i can only do every other day will be every day but rn its okay that its just when i can do it. Also loved the high five.
I love the morning menu idea.
That’s how I get myself to workout. I’d doesn’t matter what I do, it’s only important that I do something. If I don’t feel like weight lifting or running, k can do yoga. If I am not able to do 1h, I can just do 15min. Everything counts. We should be nice to ourselves:)
exactly! I often experience "perfection paralysis" where if I don't think I can do something perfectly, I won't do it at all. It's helpful to remind myself that doing something is better than doing nothing, even if it's not perfect. especially for things like exercise, or learning a new skill !
Wow, I needed this video. When I'm struggling in keeping my life together, I tend to imagine the "future me" as lost as I am, and I'm trying to help them. (by preparing my food or clothes for tomorrow, as a good people pleaser as I am). "Future me" is always grateful for the help of the "past me".
"if I wanna look hot and prosper, I gotta do it" deadass a similar mindset has kept me going consistently for like. four years now? with exercise
like sometimes I suffer a mental break and I slip, but I always come back to it
also- the high-five was very fun, it actually made me laugh
I'm turning 30 this year and for my entire life, I hated working out. My therapist suggested doing exercises that I would have done when playing as a child. I always loved to swim, like my parents would have to bribe me to get me out of the lake, so the fact that I never thought to go swimming as physical activity (or my parents never suggested it when we had so many fights about my weight) is kinda embarrassing 😅 I usually set a goal (kinda a new years resolution but less strict) and my goal this year is to finally take control of my skin, at (almost) 30 I still have terrible acne, so I'm talking to a dermatologist in a couple weeks to start that goal 😊
Amazing goal! Skin troubles are so difficult, so be kind to yourself, it'll probably take a lot of experimenting, but I'm rooting for you. 😊. Love the exercise tip too - finding something fun is so important!
goals > resolutions. I have the same goal and you just motivated me to start looking up dermatologists in my area!
10:12 I absolutely feel you...I HATE exercising. I love how I feel after. But I absolutely loath sweating.
The therapist thing is so true !!!! I want to the therapist because I had a full on crisis after my breakup, and once I got out of the crisis he told me "now that you're feeling better when can start working on yourself, before I was just there to hold your hand but it's now that the real work begins" and it makes so much sense !
I think in the end we have to find a balance between caring for us now and caring for us in the future. Like retirement savings are important but also being happy now is important
It's refreshing to find someone who gives life advice that isn't either a full-time content creator, still a student in their early 20s, or someone who seems to never have had any mental health struggles at all. I recognised myself in a lot of your struggles and realised that I'm already trying to do many of these habits myself but just need to stick to them more. So as a 25-year-old trying to cope with an anxiety disorder, I thank you for this reassurance that I'm doing better in my life than my brain likes to convince me I am.
I don’t know if this will reach you, but I’ve recently lost someone close to me and have been really going through it. The high-five through the screen genuinely made me cry, maybe I’m just emotional but thank you for making me smile today. ❤
I unconsciously started a routine of colouring on my iPad before bed each night- it started just because I wanted to colour one night, and now I have my colouring and a RUclips video on pretty much every night. It’s a nice way to satisfy my brain’s incessant urge for screen time while also doing something calming and mindful.
I’ve also found that rearranging my bedroom to better define the two spaces (bed and working area, I live with my parents still) has allowed me to switch off more effectively and spend less time staring at the tiny screen across the room because now I can’t actually even see it properly
These are both great tips! I also love coloring on my iPad - it's so satisfying!
"chew rocks!" morning routine genuinely made me laugh
same! XD
The menu thing sounds really fun to try! I’m a neurodivergent brain so finding things that work can be nuts. One recommendation for excercise I got was not to do an excercise routine but rather just find movement to do day to day/incorporating it into your daily tasks. Like “I need to go pick up this thing from the store let’s walk to the store then bus back” or another day you do a funny dance for 30 minutes.
Yeah that’s a really good tip! I don’t run much anymore but back when I used to I would literally run to Target if I needed to get something and then take the bus back just like you said. And it felt so productive bc I was both getting exercise and getting errands done. Really satisfied the brain hahah
Woah why is watching another person be real and imperfect and anxious and still be taking care of themselves so healing? I need to stop hustling my self care it's so counterproductive. Subscribed. ❤
I just want to point out that watching you clean around while you talk gives the video a somewhat welcoming and amicable vibe 🥺 thank you for sharing your perspective on quarter life crises
i think one of the biggest blessings in your late twenties and early thirties is figuring out what works for you, no shame attached. thanks for sharing these tips with us
As a skin picker in arms with you, I am TOTALLY gonna try that candle trick! It's those overhead bright lights that make me examine every little pore on my entire face, and I've never thought of just doing my skincare/night routine in dimmer light lol 😂
lol right?! I should technically wear glasses due to fading eye sight but when I do wear them I try to not look in a mirror, because then I start focusing in on all the imperfections I never noticed when not wearing my glasses! Gah it’s frustrating!
This was a great watch. Thanks so much. I'm 28, and I'm super mass-crumbling internally, even though externally, I mainly just need to find a full time job. The pandemic and some family issues a few years ago really plunged me into depression and burnout, but I'm also an overachiever/perfectionist by nature, so it's been really hard to accept myself for not having things together.
I started watching this video because I always liked this kind of content, but 10 seconds in I had an epiphany- I kinda have my life together!
I live on my own, I’m studying at a great academy with full support from my parents, I’m forming relationships with so many people, I’m able to take care of myself without worrying, eating, cleaning… I’ve spent so many years roaming in the dark, after really bad traumatic events, going through an addiction, and I worked on myself, I knew I was happy lately, I was yet to realize how much I was actually able to accomplish. And okay, now I’m crying- but it’s because I’m happy, little me would’ve never guessed where we are now, but she deserved every glimpse of happiness we have right now and WOW, this got deep fast- I’ll still watch the video to support and to know what it says but thank you very much for gifting me this quite random eye opening moment❤
I’m so happy for you, internet stranger!!! Hopefully I can get there too
that little virtual high five actually made me feel so delighted
So this the first video I'm watching from your channel, I accidentally stumbled here. And I've actually heard every one of these habits before, but STILL I ended up watching till the very end and feeling so comforted by this video... probably because of how natural and organic this feels: finally a creator who isn't showing a picture perfect frame in the background while talking. I loved seeing you go about, doing your normal things and talking to the camera as though it's just a friend in the room. Subscribed 🧡
So glad you stumbled here haha. Thank you so much for watching and subscribing! 💛
I watch a lot of videos “like” this on here and randomly today I was recommended yours. This was the first video I’ve ever watched that actually HELPED me. I am 40, and I’m feeling so lost with mental health and routines (a constant routine failure). Everything you said spoke to me. Thank you for putting this out into the universe!!
I'm so glad it resonated with you!! Thank you so much for taking the time to watch 💛
1:53 Nah the analogy works perfectly if the mountain is volcanic. People without chronic mental illnesses/neurodivergence are mountains like the Rockies where small pebbles, boulders, and maybe the odd traumatic landslide happen.
Aaaand some of us are Mount St. Helens and when things shift half of our life is gone and we’ve been permanently changed forever. Or the pressure keeps building up inside and know we are at risk of exploding. Honestly it’s an amazing analogy, one I’m definitely going to use with my family.
I found this video very helpful because it doesn’t put pressure on yourself… it basically not self sabotaging your process. I have a bad habit of self sabotaging myself by not doing X thing… etc. And getting overwhelmed by things accumulating.
I will look into these recommendations.
That puzzle comment really has me thinking. I think that’s most of the problem for me. I look at everything as a problem that needs solved, including myself. I’ve worked so so hard to the point that it’s impacted my health, and surprise… it’s never enough! Thank you for the video. I think this will help a lot of people. ❤
A habit that has helped me so much when it comes to organizing my massive closet is picking a random article of clothing every day to base my outfit off of. If I can’t make an outfit out of it, it’s given away!
I guess what i would offer as my own strategy is accepting that things take time. Dreams and life projects can take months or years, it can take half an hour to get a task done that might take someone else two minutes, it can take a full three days of rest, even if it feels uncomfortable to not be as busy, to recover enough to face down another week. Sleep and the brain cleaning and healing itself through that takes time. You can’t smoosh every little thing into your calendar, things just take time.
I'm 52 and I'm still working on all the things you talked about. Hang in there. Keep going because that's the journey. ❤
I’m 18. Med student. My life is crumbling. I feel like I found myself through you. Lots of love- m and yesss do not leave your therapy because I also did that during senior year and my life got better and then it got way worse
Hey, you don't know me, but your comment made me just want to say that I hope things are better for you. Med school is probably rough, and I pray that the good things outweigh the bad things!
@@elletee9183 hey, i was struggling a lot when i wrote that comment, i finished finals and now i am waiting for results, basically whether i passed or not... stressful! but i have hope and things are better now, thank u so much for your kindness. we need more people like u! i hope ur life is going well right now
We need more content creators like you who embrace flaws
I'm such a serious person it's hard to genuinely make me smile or laugh, specially through videos but this video made my day, I haven't smiled this much by myself in a while, thank you
As a 20 year old, handling living alone (for the first time) for a big portion of the year, you made me calm. Thank you
Man im so glad i clicked on this vid. Not only is this relatable and helpful as a young adult entering the real world, but you're so engaging and fun to listen to. Keep it up! You're a diamond in the rough
Omgeee you're so sweet - thank you for watching and I'm so glad ya found it helpful!! 💛
I LOVE the representation!! FINALLY someone online who shows how they're supporting themselves with anxiety. I TOTALLY feel you thank you so much for this. I feel like the advice from health professionals is so fecking tone deaf when it comes to mood disorders. How tf am i gonna get up and do exercise if I feel like I'm going to do it wrong or i cant stick to it or i cant do it at all? I love this. Thanks so much for sharing❤❤
Exactly! That’s why people need support and representation of people at every stage of something. Especially mood/anxiety disorders. It’s nice to see someone who’s overcome it but you also need to be able to see someone else who is at the same stage as you who you can relate to and not in a way that makes you compare yourself. I think mental health professionals are still needed to be an objective party and plant the seed of the idea “exercise helps” but you still need “proof” in the person who is over the hump and confirms that exercise helps and the person who is struggling with you to brainstorm ideas that work for you specifically. Sometimes a lot of seeds are planted (the professional), but nothing will grow if not watered (the co-struggler) and given the proper nutrients (the person who provided “proof”). In the end, a lot is up to you and your environment but having support at all stages is a part of success. Sorry if my analogy got out of hand! I wish you the best of luck and happiness on your journey!
The candle light thing is such a good idea to help with skin picking, I’ll definitely be trying that
I really needed to hear the last one. My last job was a “well paying stable job” but I was SO STRESSED it made me absolutely hate my life so I changed jobs despite it paying less. I was significantly happier initially but I’m currently in a state of questioning those decisions as it’s unstable and pays less and I’m questioning whether that was the wrong thing to do especially when I think about my future, to the point of almost regretting my decisions. But thinking back to just how unhappy and stressed I was, I tell myself it’s what I needed at the time.
Wow. I usually hate these types of videos because with my severe ADHD every advice seem impossible. But these advice look really helpful. I will attempt to try those. Thank you very much!
This is the first video of yours I believe I’ve ever watched, one minute in and I can tell you’re hilarious
I did indeed high-five you 🖐🏼
Really helped when I excepted that my best is all I can give. By definition, it is all you got. So, if I can honestly say I’m doing my best then my mind can be quiet and accept itself
I love that! I had a professor who used to say "there will be days where 'doing your best' is just getting out of bed and that's ok". I try to remember that on days where I feel like I'm not doing enough.
I am old enough to be your mother and I loved this video! Super ideas! Especially making decisions for today. I missed out on a lot as I considered the future too much. And I also high-fived the screen 😜.
Aw this comment is giving enthusiastic mother energy in the best way. Thank you for watching!! (and for the high five!)
Wow, you took the words right out of my mouth! Surprise, this is her mother! Yes, loved the positive journal as well, focusing and looking back at positive thoughts will help you in the negative times🥰👏👏👏👏
As an almost 21-year-old, I've been feeling really lost in this transition of life. Thank you for this
Damn I started watching this video as just background noise, didn't expect to tear up at the end. As someone who is constantly chasing a "perfect" way to live life but often gets overwhelmed in the process, this resonated with me so much holy shit
2:55 me cooking while listening to the video and pointing at the camera with my knife saying "that's a great idea!" 😂
LOVE the one about going to work outside of home and I have the EXACT same anxieties about working in a café hahaha, thank you for this video!
Why does 80% of your advices make total sense!? Like, even going to the gym without a routine would just make me feel like quitting... or how much I hate the biiggg Sunday resets!! Love it when I can relate to someone!
I am coming across this video during a really big life change that makes me feel like I need to do some big shifts in my day-to-day routine and operations to avoid spiraling as I navigate the situation. Taking this advice feels a lot easier than some other larger creators. Excited to continue to see videos from you in the future. :)
I JUST found you today - watched this video and the ending has me in tears. I uprooted my life a year and a half ago and moved across the country. I have struggled since the holidays last year. I found myself in a corporate job that i genuinely don’t hate but something hasn’t felt right. I left full time photography work to find myself for the first time not knowing what I truly want to do. These tips tricks and reminders really spoke to me today. I really appreciate you 💗💗💗
Menus instead of routine, really resonate with me. I will have to try implementing it with exercise.
I´m also someone who hates cleaning and can´t time manage it realistically. But recently I have started dividing the cleaning chores into 3 categories: red, yellow and green. Where the color denotes how important the chore is. I repeat the same chores each week, but it doesn´t matter which day I do them.
Wow- I am so glad to hear you mention feeling like you have nothing to talk about in therapy, I get so anxious about not having anything to bring up in therapy, but I am always happy I went afterwards. I just found your channel, and I love your energy and honesty.
It’s so nice to finally see someone who is just like me making videos for people just like me. Your advice is so helpful and motivating. Thank you!
Oh wow, I didn't realize I needed this. You remind me a lot of myself through my 20s (and the reflections of what I thought my life would be like in my teens.) I'm 30. One of the things that really gets me and paralyzes me is the uncertainty of "what if that isn't the right choice based on where I might be or what I want in life later on" And I think I really needed to hear "live for current me, not 50 year old me" so THANK you. I'm new to your channel, you've gained a new sub. :)
The idea of menus is so smart!! I am recovering from having an all or nothing mentality so that feels so much more manageable.
I feel like we could be friends in real life as someone who is painfully introverted you really do come off so kind and approachable!
Girl, felt like you were talking straight to my soul. Thank you for putting all these thoughts into words, feel like I've been feeling these things but not articulating them well. Love an organized queen!! Fr tho, I feel like we would get along!! I'm doing this passion project where I interviewing people aged 5 - 95 (90 interviews haha if that makes sense), and would love to interview you as my 27 year old :) (or 28 I can't remember which you said haha)
This impacted my life, as a 26 year old, so positively. I also feel so seen and understood after this. Thank you for transparency and vulnerability!!!
I love your energy so much. Some of the motivational videos feel so fake and not achievable but this gave me so much comfort ❤️❤️
Aw thank you!! I'm so glad this one felt comforting to you 💛
Such a real video. The menu thing is GREAT, I have sort of naturally developed that kind of system for how I spend my personal time in evenings.
I also have a junk journal scrapbook for my little adventures! It is honestly one of my favorite hobbies ever! I also recently started a task list and every week I’ll assign one task to each day! It helps a lot. And sometimes my thing assigned to the day is just running an errand or even a more fun activity I’m behind on like journaling. I’m glad to see another anxious girlie doing the same activities as I am! It makes them feel more justifiable to myself!🤣
I feel like I finally hit the bottom of life burn out the last few months. Recently, I'm finally getting some traction back on the road to motivation and I found myself doing a lot of these tips and they 100% do help and hearing your opinions and how they help you is just reenforcement that I'm going to be okay and I'm doing the right things. Thank you for cutting the weeds off my path, this video helped me a lot today ♡
10:03 Eleni was actually the youtuber that got me into working out. I started with her 30min cardio work outs and I got so excited and happy about it that I would miss exercising more. I ended up getting into Chloe Ting challenges and on a resting day I do Eleni's cardios.
100% yes to the candle/ soft bathroom light! I kind of accidentally started doing that because I often procrastinated my night time shower until it was very late and I dreaded the harsh bathroom light in my windowless bathroom. So I took my portable bedside lamp, turned the light to yellow/orange and took that to the bathroom with me and I loved how that loft lighting helped me feel beautiful so now that’s what I do when I shower, sometimes when I go to the bathroom at night…
I was born and raised up here, left for college, and then came back because COVID happened and my original plans went out the window. I’m glad they did because now I have a job and a house and a husband (he’s also an AA native but moved to the UP several years before we met). He lovingly calls our house “the cabin” since he loves our little slice of heaven. We do get road noise though since we’re pretty close to a highway.
This was so helpful! I'm currently in the mountain is imploding stage but realize that the mountain still stands at the end of the day. Growing up is so scary and uncertain but these tips helped me give myself grace and compassion. I love how real and honest you were about these things. Thank you ❤
i just come across your channel, i find this so comforting, and you're so real. I feel like im on facetime
Hey Morgan! I'm probably pretty late but your video just popped up on my recommendations. I just turned 26 the first week of June and I feel like this has been the worst year for me so far. On my birthday, I felt miserable and the lowest I had ever been. I saw how my peers were doing online and thought to myself how much better their lives unfolded. Professionally and socially and felt left out and stuck. I reflected on it for a while and realized I was having a quarter-life crisis. I felt like I had wasted my college years on a degree I didn't really like, I was neglecting my hobbies, and I feel like I may never evolve in my current field of work because I don't have the credentials to back it up. I've been in my current job for 5 years now and it has made me grow so much. I feel so privileged to be able to work with family and friends. But I still feel so....insufficient. I feel like I lack in so many ways (not materially).
Your words in this video kind of put things in perspective for me and made me realize I was worrying about the wrong things. I also asked myself the questions your therapists pushed about the lifestyle you have now and realized I'm actually living pretty comfrotably. I was just focusing on the wrong things.
Anyway. Thank you so much for sharing this with us. I really hope you'll consider posting content like this int he future. It really made me feel like I was not alone and that it's okay to be confused sometimes. Much love!
The idea of life not being a puzzle may have just given me a lot to think about as I get ready to enter the last year of my 20s 😶💛
I used to HATE folding laundry. But I saw in a video or tiktok somewhere where if you pair something you hate with something you love, it makes a drastic difference. So now I put on a tv show or a RUclips video while I’m folding laundry and it makes it 100x easier. 🤗
I really appreciate you doing stuff while you're talking because I have a hard time paying attention when nothing is going on except someone talking. I was able to take in a lot more of your video. Thanks for sharing. You have some great ideas that I can definitely incorporate. The menu may be my new favorite thing.
This is so interesting. I think these videos alot are so "take what you need" I just watched this video two seconds ago of this guy saying to "work from home it's easy", and you saying "work outside of home, it's uplifting" is so interesting because it shows how different these perspectives and these circumstances could really work for certain people. Personally, do love working outside of home.
First time coming across your content and I love the style. It’s like you’re just having a little catch up with us while you go about your day. I love the idea of pairing skin care with something you love, I got into this routine too and it makes such a difference to how consistent I am with it.
this is the first video i have watched from you, thank you so much for being so honest about your experiences, i have never identified with someone's tiny little daily experiences this much before online! you are giving so many people comfort, inspiration and motivation thank you!
ps. love the mug
Aw thank you so much for sharing this. I'm so glad my experiences resonated with you 💛
oh my god this is the first time i have ever heard of micro cleans it's gonna be a gamechanger i can tell
I feel seen with the working outside your home point. I talk to people about how I was in an alternative schooling program ever since 3rd grade, and they always get cheerful and say "Oh I'd kill for that! I wish I could've grown up in a school like that." Even when I talked to people who also used that schooling program, they said they loved it and I was being a pessimist or invalidating their enjoyment.
I have and had ADHD and anxiety problems, and being stuck in my house 6 days a week with nothing but my thoughts, a pile of work that was inextricable from my regular life, and no extrinsic motivation was hell. So was adjusting when I started having responsibilities outside of my home.
I want to write a novel this year and I have a 9-5 so I have set up a routine where I write in the morning before work. It’s been one of the best things ever. I’m excited to get up and once I’ve finished my writing for the day, I feel like I’ve accomplished something big and it doesn’t matter if I do nothing else the whole day (which will probably never happen I’ll still do things). It’s a big boost of motivation first thing.
Omg. I found this video at the perfect time. We're so similar -- the skin picking, 12-3-30, impulse buying, trying to start a routine. I can't wait to try the tools you've suggested to dig myself out of this hole
It's been a while since a video resonated this much. You hit the nail on the head on every. single. anxious. thought. (and bad habit) I've been trying to deal with!
I'll definitely be adopting your insight into my life. From an anxious 20-something to another, thank you!!
Omg you're welcome! I'm so glad my ramblings could help ya out 💛