When one is being gaslighted, one of the strongest feelings is the sense that something is most dreadfully wrong, but with the inability to determine exactly what it is that is wrong. It becomes debilitating, and then worse!
I have a gaslight burn right through my soul, and I miss who I was, could have been, and SHOULD’ve been. ⚠️HOWEVER, I still know that: ✨THERE IS FREEDOM IN THE UGLY TRUTH✨
I have found that being alone because I don't fit in is more of a blessing than a rejection... And besides they don't deserve my attention, respect, and love anyway... Thx for this vid. It helped me heal and bring up my self confidence. ♥️🥳💕
@Spirit Lovewith all love and respect, I will say that I’m envious of your PHYSICAL separation… I feel some strength in knowing what ultimately matters. Knowledge has never gained me any power, but it does make me stronger.
@Spirit Love Please don't take my question as negative, but I'm genuinely curious if you have any close friendships? You spoke of ridding yourself of your 'evil family' and "everyone" around you so I'm wondering if you are completely alone now or not.
It was a good reminder for me today too. Being in the profession I am, I do already know the things I know, such as this. That does not make it any easier to apply it to oneself as most of us also know. I feel like I was guided to clicking on this one particular link in a sea of links I received today. I’m grateful. Very very grateful.
Was gaslit by my parents (especially my mother), and my brothers (I have no sisters). Some friends and lovers have gaslit me also. Thank G_D, I learned how to better protect myself through the years. Saddened third parties believed them rather than ask for my side of the story. Others were afraid of them and knew they were lying.
You have one of the most soothing voices ever. I suffer from anxiety, OCD and narcissistic abuse and your videos & extremely soothing voice relax me nightly before bedtime (3am 😢)
Thank you ! I prayed to God to help me clear out the toxic smoke in my life ! I was raised by two narc parents & very abusive narc older sister they manipulated me so much I cut them off because there not safe for me me they are really toxic it was damaging my soul & health & intuition! I now can fully trust myself 🙏🏻✨
This is interesting. Was with a man who was very charming and kind. But my whole body stomach and soul. Screamed from stop and no. Refused to listen. It became an expensive lesson. Also began to feel physically ill and confused. Disgusting .So now I listen to my body.Recovers me and takes back my life.With myself.
I just got out of a relationship but I feel maybe I got to the point where I was lied to so much that I was gaslighting myself and thought I had an anxiety disorder! Thank you for your videos.
I wrote a list of things that I felt confused and didnt fit the picture. Validating thoughts and feelings is sooo important as gaslighting distorts your perception. Thanks for speaking so clearly about this manipulation, makes it easier to spot in the future. Xx
When you grow up where everything is so distorted, you're smiling in family photos and you remember happy times but your mind body and soul is carrying all the dark horrible parts as well then you get gaslighting it's so crazy making you don't trust yourself. When it's a child they dint have any defenses, you think it's normal and there is something wrong with you even when you feel really bad. It's the most bizarre and horrible feeling to be angry hurt upset scared and you know you aren't allowed to talk about that so you grab the happy bits and heading adulthood completely confused. Then the biggest gaslight of all when the cracks start to show as you don't have coping skills, you have mental health issues and need therapy ie. you're the crazy one!! ✌
This is crazy... cause I’ve recently left a relationship which was emotionally abusive.. the tipping point was an event and I was told I was wrong. Gaslighting. But now, I have such strong intuition these days! Wow
Mindfullness helps us realise what is real and important in life and it focuses our attention on facts and evidence which is something abusive narcisists do not want - they want us to feel only so we must THINK AND BE RATIONAL ONLY when in their presence. Thank you and Happy New Year❤
I was gaslit for 20 years and I am so damaged now I finally got away. 4 years in I am seeing how damaged I am. How do I recover from it? I am now seeing more and more the damage that is done to me. He made me doubt my own mental state, I called lifeline numerous times as a cry for help.... I am a different person after escaping but I still see him once a week with our son's basketball and he still does it to me.
Dont think of yourself as ruined or damaged. Like many of us youve been in low places because its something life does to us all, bringing us down and making us wiser.
I used to be in the same situation when I was in a long term relationship with a narcissist. We lived together, so the only time I could use my phone in peace was at work or in the bathroom at home. Something that helped me regain a bit more personal space was to start taking long walks after work without the narcissist. They won't like it a bit though, so be prepared for some resistance or the silent treatment. But this precious time alone can really help you sort out your thoughts and feelings and start making more rational decisions about your current relationship!
Waiting to he get sleep and go to the living room.. at last you can think on you're own...look out he now..that you are not there After he sees you go out.
@@shiniemi2754 I'm not allowed to go for walks with out him cause he didnt want men lusting over me.i cant go swimming without him cause its disrespectful..he has to be with me
@@vanessamoreno2833 when you do what he says it get worse.they dont believe..you. becaurse they are liars.. .when you have people around you .you're mother sister brother..friends, thinks go better. I don't now you're situation..but I think it's better that you make plans to go out off there..seek help dont say anything you planning..it get worse ..not better ..money children jewelry car bike every thing you have he use it against you. Every thing you love you're dog cat suddenly there not there any more..run .
Great words of advice. I have been making small strides to get myself in a position to leave my narcissistic husband. I will be looking into some mindful meditations to do on you tube. I have a great feeling this will be the last stepping stone to get me out of my thoughts of so much self doubt. I really thought I have been going crazy. Not so, he's a master at manupilation.
The fact that you feel like you are going crazy is a sign of gaslighting. I know I had that feeling too, but watch what happens when you confront him and he makes you back off. Does he have a smirk on his face for getting you back under his coercive controle? That's a sure sign of manipulation as well. A normal person would worry about their loved one's feelings, not gloating about having 'won' a discussion.
I feel so stupid because I was hospitalized due to my narcissist and his gaslighting skills and I say institutionalized very Loosely it was a rehab / mental health place that I was in 46 days and that was a year ago and I'm still trying to get myself back together whatever that means for me
My ex made me believe that I didn't see what I saw; Him holding his phone to the side and swiping the messages away before showing me the screen. He did this a few times over a couple of weeks, also blocked me from seeing him online on Fb when I asked him who he was talking to. Lastly, he said: is this something you experienced before? My intuition was literally screaming, but he always had an excuse and I was always wrong according to him.
I've spent my entire life ducking and waving mostly because my father just let me from practically birth sometimes I wanted to kill myself but I had a nice mother for the first 10 years of my life and she gave me the confidence to duck and weave I wish I had known about this earlier I am 68 years old the bastard is long dead and it's taking me forever to even get to this point I think the duck and weave bit saved my life in a lot of ways do I wish I hadn't had to learn it because it affects how I see people to this very day and affects what I see in things that I don't understand it affects me in places where I try to think of every scenario like you mentioned and it just gets to you I feel like all I can do is try to survive and I'm very lucky to have and I found a good therapist as for journaling my father found them a couple of times and used them against me so to this day I'm afraid to write down anything I wish I could have done better and I wish I had known about this a lot earlier however I didn't waste my life I love camping I can paint and play instruments and I must have known way back then it was my only Outlet thank you for this lesson and I wish that younger people could learn it much much earlier
New subscriber because of your valuable content. Really appreciate you covering this topic. Just went through this with someone I met this year and in the healing process.
Now I'm realizing that every time that my father used to say that I'm a liar, it was only when I used gaslight tactic that he using all my life - back against him. I'm 30 YO now and I'm suffering for complex PTSD and anxiety from age 6-7 🙄🥴
I have a close friend who is very Bossy. Also, he has to be right on every subject. Everything he works on Plumbingl, Carpentry-Building & Tools, Auto-Machanics etc...he is the only one that knows how to be Correct. Its Extremely Hard to be with him when I'm doing a job or Hobby, he Takes over. He GASLIGHTS me to often, in the past my feelings would be Crippled destroyed. Now I tell him wear to go!!!! & LEAVE. I know who I am & don't let his PROBLEMS go towards me. MY QUESTION > How can help him see the Light, His dad days he's his own worst ENEMY. I get it now.
I been In this relationship for 2 years..i feel like he gets a kick out of saying cruel and mean things.i mean awful awful things.he scares me,as hes telling me mean cruel stuff he screaming at the top of his lungs.the only way to get him to back off is saying ok ok what ever you say,your right.gaslighting is so very damaging
@@susanclifford1094 thank you!I did i got out.i left yesterday.i had too.its been stressful.he texting calling me names,throwing personal stuff in my face,belittling me,I'm a good for nothing,I'm worthless I mean it goes on and on.
@@vanessanagl5374 thank you..it was a very hard thing to do .I still love him but I love my sanity more..he was breaking me piece by piece. I could6let him do that anymore
@@vanessamoreno2833 i was in this situation last time and ik how hard it can be idk if it’s happening again and that’s why i’m here but it’s all sounding familiar and i don’t want it to happen again
When I confronted my wife about my feelings that she may be a narcissist she told me that I’m a narcissist and then I wondered if I actually was a narcissist! How do I know if I am one?
I have been living in a small Christian town and it took me 5 years to find out that they were gaslighting me. Trying to get me converted. I found out what gaslighting was on the internet by accident. The psychology of torture, explains what they have done to me in a T. I called my ex sister in law who used to be my psychologist years ago and asked her about it. She confirmed that it does happen in small towns. They were trying to make me become one of their community. I was the wrong person to do that to. My house will be on the market tomorrow. It has been a living nightmare here for me.' 10 years now. And they are still gaslighting me. Firdt it was verbally, after I told them I knew what they were doing, they started gaslighting me with physical objects. Long story. But I always knew I didn't like living in small towns. I have never lived in one longer that a year. These people have made me so ill. I trust no one.
Such an interesting point, i experienced something similliar with christian conservative family who also live in a small town. For twenty years i thought of them as "salt-of-the-earth" folk but the cracks started to appear over time. My blessing came in disguise, my troubles started with a disordered boss and led to me having to learn everything i could about psychological warfare. I confided in family about my work troubles and they seemed to be supportive but looking back i realize they were giving me mixed messages about my worthiness as a person. My aunts go-to weapon of choice was silent-treatment. It triggered abandonment trauma and anxiety. Come to think of it, she wouldnt have known about my traumas if i hadnt trusted in her and confided in her in the first place...
My gran uses my little sister to gaslight me and my little sister.. we've both lost our mum and our dads are wastes of space , she has no1 like me but I'm 27 and she's 10. It's so painful to be in my position , i have no family or freinds because they are all narcs and I'm a super empath. Please lord you need to help me before i end up killing myself or finding a way to do because the only reason I'm not is because I'm scared to do it but want it to happen. Amen
Ugh.. I feel so fucked at this point. Fair warning, maybe this will help someone else that relates to know they’re not alone, but I’m venting my situation a bit here so if that will drain you then don’t read. I need to move away so badly. I’m an empath currently living with my mother, idk what she’s considered even, maybe a covert passive narcissist that’s nice and kind which makes it even harder, she’s constantly anxiously speaking outloud overthinking every single thing, constantly crossing simple boundaries, she’s always feeling guilty and is a complete people pleaser. I feel the energy of this which it just makes me feel guilt for idk what even most the time, unless she states things that she thinks I should be guilty for even though that’s her problem. I feel shame, no self worth, no confidence. These were never things before this and I need to figure out how to block it out and not feel her energy, at least just enough to give me the energy and will to live and enough faith to figure out what to do to get out. it has destroyed me mentally. I’ve been moved out on my own for around 10 years before this, basically 2 years ago broke my back, a bunch of autoimmune diseases came up and more problems that caused me to move here temporarily. I’m so drained that I can’t even think of taking any type of stressors without having panic attacks or stress tremors. I don’t smile here, I don’t feel comfortable talking on the phone in this house, even texting I feel guilty for and it makes no sense other than the abuse having me on eggshells. Ive stopped enjoying any little thing since it was always criticized so now I feel guilty for even organizing since she would get jealous of me being more organized and then she would end up doing something in a nice way that she knows would trigger me. It’s a pattern I’ve observed happen time after time. Its so toxic and I need to become myself again. been sleeping every other day so I have a little peace during the night without being disturbed. I hear her voice in my head sometimes of her disturbing me and look over at the door to see if she’s there trying to tell me something, most of the time shit that does matter like I’m going for a walk or store or literally anything like a child. I was doing so well before all this when I stopped talking to my family. I just hope to escape and heal from this all somehow.
Here's a problem that occurs with learning about gaslighting, people can accuse you of it when you simply disagree with them or have a different take on something. I myself have been accused of being a narc or gaslighting simply because I disagreed and again just had a different take or an opinion than the other person. This is where the old saying comes in, a little bit of knowledge can be dangerous. It's becoming very popular to accuse people of being a narc or gaslighting these days and the terms are being way over used and used for finger pointing at the drop of a hat.
@@cymbolichuman433 Ahole is not a psychiatric term (though some would like it to be so). My point is that narcissist and gaslighting are valuable terms that are losing their power sort of speak because they're being so overused and therefore deluded of their true meaning. In fact instead of calling someone an a hole we're calling people narcs and gaslighters. So yeah, that's my point.
I have heard teenagers accusing their friends of narcissism, simply for demonstrating a small level of self confidence. Having confidence is a good thing and especially important for teens struggling to find their place in this crazy world. I have 4 teenagers and we are all recovering from long term emotional abuse from an actual narcissist, so I really hear you on this one. It's very frustrating to hear these terms banded about. It invalidates the damage that actual narcissism and gas lighting cause.
Interesting question. I wouldn't be able to say it's impossible yet it's tough to speculate on a broad basis. And I'd definitely hope it would be rare if it is a yes. 🙏❤
@@CommonEgo a second question,, how would looks like if the gasligting was done by the police? I mean in order to cover up harassment, intimidation, racial profiling etc.. I forgot to mention, I am Canadian living in Mexico were the human rights are constantly violated by the Mexican authorities. Thanks
Hi, thanks for the answer, I am fraud analyst and i am currently studying narcissist and psychopath personalities in the police force, I have found that the police is using narcissist techniques such love booming, guilt, gasligting, mock execution and more, when they are investigating a person that they want to find guilty, ultimately if the person is innocent they can justify their actions by labeling the target subject as a "mentally unstable" o person with mental problems even when they created the mental state through gasligting and other narcissist techniques. Even they target their families and support group by using slander and destruction the person reputation. In Mexico is very common use this techniques to human rights activists, reportes and lawyers, in Ottawa Canada is common used this techniques in visible minorities. ..
So i startedating a russian guy. Whenever I tried talking about us , he would tell me " I dont understand" :( I was always in confusion . It made me go crazy
My narc was always gaslighting me i hated it. He would hide something I bought and placed somewhere id say I put it on the counter he laughed lifted the cooler and showed me were he hid it. Not funny
Wow…just like the movie. Gaslight, with Ingrid Bergman & Charles Boyer filmed in 1944. It’s a classic. Hope you get a chance to watch it soon, if you haven’t already.
I saw a video on the RUclips channel called "Church Militant" yesterday titled, "It Has Got to Stop". On the video several priests other than being respected by all of their parishioners who were randomly respected while often using social media too who all admitted except for 1 of them that they were ordered into rehab for having a questionable diagnosis of a mental illness right after for example a car accident or whatever which ended up costing their parishioners a whole lot. If that isn't gaslighting then I don't know what is. Another thing. Why are researchers now claiming that people who are believers tend to have lower I.Q.? Something must be off in research land instead. Another form of gaslighting is archaic laws that have been in place for much longer time than what is reasonable only to continue keeping us women or disabled people in their place. Like how assets on a farm are divided up during divorce because lawmakers still assume that women are not strong and smart enough to do farming work regardless of how much technology that is now available to them too. Which is why more very intelligent women right now are choose to become nuns while hoping that will ensure that they will no longer have to be squelching their own intelligence and limit the growth of their physical strength during their 20's while constant conforming to what is being expected of them just for being female. Sometimes that hope is realized. Sometimes depending on what order they join that hope cannot be realized since some mother superiors who have deep insecurities regardless of the fact they were born into a functional enough for them family. The mother superior is only interested in conforming to the commonplace everywhere soft bigotry of low expectations towards women while they are earning their brownie points from local priests and bishops instead of trusting the gift of womanhood too while they are continuing to grow. Wouldn't be that much of an ordeal for a woman who falls on the norm for almost all characteristics however for some taller than the norm women with a degree to be a school teacher such kind of nun in an overcontrolled richer neighborhood nunnery could end up feeling like it is a nightmare while no longer having opportunity to get enough weight bearing and aerobic exercise for their height while always having to wear a nun habit and thus no longer having opportunity for intellectual growth too. Becoming a missionary in another nation would then be their only escape from that kind of tyranny. Like what happened in mother Theresa's life.
Hi there! I absolutely love your content but something about the sound.... your voice “drops out” while you speak and makes it difficult to hear you well. Just wanted to let you know 🙂
When one is being gaslighted, one of the strongest feelings is the sense that something is most dreadfully wrong, but with the inability to determine exactly what it is that is wrong. It becomes debilitating, and then worse!
I have a gaslight burn right through my soul, and I miss who I was, could have been, and SHOULD’ve been.
⚠️HOWEVER, I still know that:
✨THERE IS FREEDOM IN THE UGLY TRUTH✨
I have found that being alone because I don't fit in is more of a blessing than a rejection...
And besides they don't deserve my attention, respect, and love anyway...
Thx for this vid.
It helped me heal and bring up my self confidence. ♥️🥳💕
Glad to hear that, and thank you for watching ❤🙏
Well said!
@Spirit Lovewith all love and respect, I will say that I’m envious of your PHYSICAL separation… I feel some strength in knowing what ultimately matters.
Knowledge has never gained me any power, but it does make me stronger.
@Spirit Love Please don't take my question as negative, but I'm genuinely curious if you have any close friendships?
You spoke of ridding yourself of your 'evil family' and "everyone" around you so I'm wondering if you are completely alone now or not.
I was totally guided to this video today. Needed to hear this, and am working on ME. Wow... it is a journey.
It was a good reminder for me today too. Being in the profession I am, I do already know the things I know, such as this. That does not make it any easier to apply it to oneself as most of us also know. I feel like I was guided to clicking on this one particular link in a sea of links I received today. I’m grateful. Very very grateful.
@@KatieMahony ❤
Same omg.
Was gaslit by my parents (especially my mother), and my brothers (I have no sisters). Some friends and lovers have gaslit me also. Thank G_D, I learned how to better protect myself through the years. Saddened third parties believed them rather than ask for my side of the story. Others were afraid of them and knew they were lying.
😢
You have one of the most soothing voices ever. I suffer from anxiety, OCD and narcissistic abuse and your videos & extremely soothing voice relax me nightly before bedtime (3am 😢)
Thank you ! I prayed to God to help me clear out the toxic smoke in my life ! I was raised by two narc parents & very abusive narc older sister they manipulated me so much I cut them off because there not safe for me me they are really toxic it was damaging my soul & health & intuition! I now can fully trust myself 🙏🏻✨
This is interesting. Was with a man who was very charming and kind. But my whole body stomach and soul. Screamed from stop and no. Refused to listen. It became an expensive lesson. Also began to feel physically ill and confused. Disgusting .So now I listen to my body.Recovers me and takes back my life.With myself.
I just got out of a relationship but I feel maybe I got to the point where I was lied to so much that I was gaslighting myself and thought I had an anxiety disorder! Thank you for your videos.
I wrote a list of things that I felt confused and didnt fit the picture. Validating thoughts and feelings is sooo important as gaslighting distorts your perception. Thanks for speaking so clearly about this manipulation, makes it easier to spot in the future. Xx
This woman is amazing and so beautiful her voice is so calming to me..
When you grow up where everything is so distorted, you're smiling in family photos and you remember happy times but your mind body and soul is carrying all the dark horrible parts as well then you get gaslighting it's so crazy making you don't trust yourself. When it's a child they dint have any defenses, you think it's normal and there is something wrong with you even when you feel really bad. It's the most bizarre and horrible feeling to be angry hurt upset scared and you know you aren't allowed to talk about that so you grab the happy bits and heading adulthood completely confused. Then the biggest gaslight of all when the cracks start to show as you don't have coping skills, you have mental health issues and need therapy ie. you're the crazy one!! ✌
This is crazy... cause I’ve recently left a relationship which was emotionally abusive.. the tipping point was an event and I was told I was wrong. Gaslighting. But now, I have such strong intuition these days! Wow
I had not put this together before, so thank you! It's torture to question yourself. And your advice about mindfulness is spot on 🙏
Mindfullness helps us realise what is real and important in life and it focuses our attention on facts and evidence which is something abusive narcisists do not want - they want us to feel only so we must THINK AND BE RATIONAL ONLY when in their presence. Thank you and Happy New Year❤
I was gaslit for 20 years and I am so damaged now I finally got away. 4 years in I am seeing how damaged I am. How do I recover from it? I am now seeing more and more the damage that is done to me. He made me doubt my own mental state, I called lifeline numerous times as a cry for help.... I am a different person after escaping but I still see him once a week with our son's basketball and he still does it to me.
@@chriswyma145 thanks so much for your incredible reply and words. That means so much and I will take that on board. Thank you 💖
I recommend checking out Melanie Tonia Evans on RUclips. She has uplifting videos and a paid healing program if you want to commit to your healing.
Dont think of yourself as ruined or damaged. Like many of us youve been in low places because its something life does to us all, bringing us down and making us wiser.
@@elevatedlife3884 thank you...I will💖💖
@@Feline-philosopher thank you for your words❤️❤️
I'm working on it. Thanks so much. You have some really great videos. Very succinct and to the point.
I cant write anything without him right there..he has to have access to everything
I used to be in the same situation when I was in a long term relationship with a narcissist. We lived together, so the only time I could use my phone in peace was at work or in the bathroom at home. Something that helped me regain a bit more personal space was to start taking long walks after work without the narcissist. They won't like it a bit though, so be prepared for some resistance or the silent treatment. But this precious time alone can really help you sort out your thoughts and feelings and start making more rational decisions about your current relationship!
Waiting to he get sleep and go to the living room.. at last you can think on you're own...look out he now..that you are not there
After he sees you go out.
@@shiniemi2754 I'm not allowed to go for walks with out him cause he didnt want men lusting over me.i cant go swimming without him cause its disrespectful..he has to be with me
@@janettekreulen54 if I leave the room im hiding something. When I'm the phone I'm doing something wrong.
@@vanessamoreno2833 when you do what he says it get worse.they dont believe..you. becaurse they are liars..
.when you have people around you .you're mother sister brother..friends, thinks go better. I don't now you're situation..but I think it's better that you make plans to go out off there..seek help dont say anything you planning..it get worse ..not better ..money children jewelry car bike every thing you have he use it against you.
Every thing you love you're dog cat suddenly there not there any more..run
.
Great words of advice. I have been making small strides to get myself in a position to leave my narcissistic husband. I will be looking into some mindful meditations to do on you tube. I have a great feeling this will be the last stepping stone to get me out of my thoughts of so much self doubt. I really thought I have been going crazy. Not so, he's a master at manupilation.
The fact that you feel like you are going crazy is a sign of gaslighting. I know I had that feeling too, but watch what happens when you confront him and he makes you back off. Does he have a smirk on his face for getting you back under his coercive controle? That's a sure sign of manipulation as well. A normal person would worry about their loved one's feelings, not gloating about having 'won' a discussion.
It’s insidious, been through it and still trying to recover. Thanks for making these videos! Knowledge is power.
I feel so stupid because I was hospitalized due to my narcissist and his gaslighting skills and I say institutionalized very Loosely it was a rehab / mental health place that I was in 46 days and that was a year ago and I'm still trying to get myself back together whatever that means for me
My ex made me believe that I didn't see what I saw; Him holding his phone to the side and swiping the messages away before showing me the screen. He did this a few times over a couple of weeks, also blocked me from seeing him online on Fb when I asked him who he was talking to. Lastly, he said: is this something you experienced before? My intuition was literally screaming, but he always had an excuse and I was always wrong according to him.
Hey Christina!! Gaslighting is becoming a huge word! Lol 🔥. I hope you’re doing well! Chat soon beautiful! 😉😍🙏❤️
Hi Pete! True, and awareness is good because so important to remain grounded in reality. Hope you're doing well!! 🙏❤
Thank you Christina! I may have been gaslit in a past relationship. Have had panic issues ever since.
I've spent my entire life ducking and waving mostly because my father just let me from practically birth sometimes I wanted to kill myself but I had a nice mother for the first 10 years of my life and she gave me the confidence to duck and weave I wish I had known about this earlier I am 68 years old the bastard is long dead and it's taking me forever to even get to this point I think the duck and weave bit saved my life in a lot of ways do I wish I hadn't had to learn it because it affects how I see people to this very day and affects what I see in things that I don't understand it affects me in places where I try to think of every scenario like you mentioned and it just gets to you I feel like all I can do is try to survive and I'm very lucky to have and I found a good therapist as for journaling my father found them a couple of times and used them against me so to this day I'm afraid to write down anything I wish I could have done better and I wish I had known about this a lot earlier however I didn't waste my life I love camping I can paint and play instruments and I must have known way back then it was my only Outlet thank you for this lesson and I wish that younger people could learn it much much earlier
All of the above, thanks for the video.
New subscriber because of your valuable content. Really appreciate you covering this topic. Just went through this with someone I met this year and in the healing process.
Don't argue with someone who is trying to fool you. Stand strong in
your own beliefs. If anything, convince them that you believe them.
Thanks.❤.
Now I'm realizing that every time that my father used to say that I'm a liar, it was only when I used gaslight tactic that he using all my life - back against him. I'm 30 YO now and I'm suffering for complex PTSD and anxiety from age 6-7 🙄🥴
Thank you for all your videos.
Can you make a video on stoicism versus narcissism I think stoicism is the only defense that is worth anything against narcissistic people
Thanks for your great advice
Thank you for the video, it is helpful.
THANKS VERY MUCH(!!!) namsaste
I have a close friend who is very Bossy. Also, he has to be right on every subject. Everything he works on Plumbingl, Carpentry-Building & Tools, Auto-Machanics etc...he is the only one that knows how to be Correct. Its Extremely Hard to be with him when I'm doing a job or Hobby, he Takes over. He GASLIGHTS me to often, in the past my feelings would be Crippled destroyed. Now I tell him wear to go!!!! & LEAVE. I know who I am & don't let his PROBLEMS go towards me. MY QUESTION > How can help him see the Light, His dad days he's his own worst ENEMY. I get it now.
I'm so close to a blessing and i don't mean to sound ungrateful but the biggest blessing would be for me to not wake up tomorrow
You are amazing thanks!;
Nice mice. So clear with the voice 🤟
I been In this relationship for 2 years..i feel like he gets a kick out of saying cruel and mean things.i mean awful awful things.he scares me,as hes telling me mean cruel stuff he screaming at the top of his lungs.the only way to get him to back off is saying ok ok what ever you say,your right.gaslighting is so very damaging
Leave him! You deserve to be respected! Get out while you can .
@@susanclifford1094 thank you!I did i got out.i left yesterday.i had too.its been stressful.he texting calling me names,throwing personal stuff in my face,belittling me,I'm a good for nothing,I'm worthless I mean it goes on and on.
@@vanessamoreno2833 omg u are so strong i’m proud of u
@@vanessanagl5374 thank you..it was a very hard thing to do .I still love him but I love my sanity more..he was breaking me piece by piece. I could6let him do that anymore
@@vanessamoreno2833 i was in this situation last time and ik how hard it can be idk if it’s happening again and that’s why i’m here but it’s all sounding familiar and i don’t want it to happen again
When I confronted my wife about my feelings that she may be a narcissist she told me that I’m a narcissist and then I wondered if I actually was a narcissist! How do I know if I am one?
I have been living in a small Christian town and it took me 5 years to find out that they were gaslighting me. Trying to get me converted. I found out what gaslighting was on the internet by accident. The psychology of torture, explains what they have done to me in a T. I called my ex sister in law who used to be my psychologist years ago and asked her about it. She confirmed that it does happen in small towns. They were trying to make me become one of their community. I was the wrong person to do that to. My house will be on the market tomorrow. It has been a living nightmare here for me.' 10 years now. And they are still gaslighting me. Firdt it was verbally, after I told them I knew what they were doing, they started gaslighting me with physical objects. Long story. But I always knew I didn't like living in small towns. I have never lived in one longer that a year. These people have made me so ill. I trust no one.
Such an interesting point, i experienced something similliar with christian conservative family who also live in a small town. For twenty years i thought of them as "salt-of-the-earth" folk but the cracks started to appear over time. My blessing came in disguise, my troubles started with a disordered boss and led to me having to learn everything i could about psychological warfare. I confided in family about my work troubles and they seemed to be supportive but looking back i realize they were giving me mixed messages about my worthiness as a person. My aunts go-to weapon of choice was silent-treatment. It triggered abandonment trauma and anxiety. Come to think of it, she wouldnt have known about my traumas if i hadnt trusted in her and confided in her in the first place...
Great wisdom as usual, but your audio! You have such a beutiful voice that's all. Still the best though.
My gran uses my little sister to gaslight me and my little sister.. we've both lost our mum and our dads are wastes of space , she has no1 like me but I'm 27 and she's 10. It's so painful to be in my position , i have no family or freinds because they are all narcs and I'm a super empath. Please lord you need to help me before i end up killing myself or finding a way to do because the only reason I'm not is because I'm scared to do it but want it to happen. Amen
Ugh.. I feel so fucked at this point.
Fair warning, maybe this will help someone else that relates to know they’re not alone, but I’m venting my situation a bit here so if that will drain you then don’t read.
I need to move away so badly. I’m an empath currently living with my mother, idk what she’s considered even, maybe a covert passive narcissist that’s nice and kind which makes it even harder, she’s constantly anxiously speaking outloud overthinking every single thing, constantly crossing simple boundaries, she’s always feeling guilty and is a complete people pleaser. I feel the energy of this which it just makes me feel guilt for idk what even most the time, unless she states things that she thinks I should be guilty for even though that’s her problem. I feel shame, no self worth, no confidence. These were never things before this and I need to figure out how to block it out and not feel her energy, at least just enough to give me the energy and will to live and enough faith to figure out what to do to get out. it has destroyed me mentally. I’ve been moved out on my own for around 10 years before this, basically 2 years ago broke my back, a bunch of autoimmune diseases came up and more problems that caused me to move here temporarily. I’m so drained that I can’t even think of taking any type of stressors without having panic attacks or stress tremors. I don’t smile here, I don’t feel comfortable talking on the phone in this house, even texting I feel guilty for and it makes no sense other than the abuse having me on eggshells. Ive stopped enjoying any little thing since it was always criticized so now I feel guilty for even organizing since she would get jealous of me being more organized and then she would end up doing something in a nice way that she knows would trigger me. It’s a pattern I’ve observed happen time after time. Its so toxic and I need to become myself again. been sleeping every other day so I have a little peace during the night without being disturbed. I hear her voice in my head sometimes of her disturbing me and look over at the door to see if she’s there trying to tell me something, most of the time shit that does matter like I’m going for a walk or store or literally anything like a child. I was doing so well before all this when I stopped talking to my family. I just hope to escape and heal from this all somehow.
Here's a problem that occurs with learning about gaslighting, people can accuse you of it when you simply disagree with them or have a different take on something. I myself have been accused of being a narc or gaslighting simply because I disagreed and again just had a different take or an opinion than the other person. This is where the old saying comes in, a little bit of knowledge can be dangerous. It's becoming very popular to accuse people of being a narc or gaslighting these days and the terms are being way over used and used for finger pointing at the drop of a hat.
Asshole is overused, but quite true.
@@cymbolichuman433 Ahole is not a psychiatric term (though some would like it to be so).
My point is that narcissist and gaslighting are valuable terms that are losing their power sort of speak because they're being so overused and therefore deluded of their true meaning. In fact instead of calling someone an a hole we're calling people narcs and gaslighters. So yeah, that's my point.
I have heard teenagers accusing their friends of narcissism, simply for demonstrating a small level of self confidence.
Having confidence is a good thing and especially important for teens struggling to find their place in this crazy world.
I have 4 teenagers and we are all recovering from long term emotional abuse from an actual narcissist, so I really hear you on this one.
It's very frustrating to hear these terms banded about.
It invalidates the damage that actual narcissism and gas lighting cause.
A question, is gasligting used by the police?? I means as a form of police brutality or racial profiling??
Interesting question. I wouldn't be able to say it's impossible yet it's tough to speculate on a broad basis. And I'd definitely hope it would be rare if it is a yes. 🙏❤
@@CommonEgo a second question,, how would looks like if the gasligting was done by the police? I mean in order to cover up harassment, intimidation, racial profiling etc.. I forgot to mention, I am Canadian living in Mexico were the human rights are constantly violated by the Mexican authorities. Thanks
I think there are some police that use gaslighting because it is their personality, in uniform and out.
Hi, thanks for the answer, I am fraud analyst and i am currently studying narcissist and psychopath personalities in the police force, I have found that the police is using narcissist techniques such love booming, guilt, gasligting, mock execution and more, when they are investigating a person that they want to find guilty, ultimately if the person is innocent they can justify their actions by labeling the target subject as a "mentally unstable" o person with mental problems even when they created the mental state through gasligting and other narcissist techniques. Even they target their families and support group by using slander and destruction the person reputation. In Mexico is very common use this techniques to human rights activists, reportes and lawyers, in Ottawa Canada is common used this techniques in visible minorities. ..
My EX DID THIS TO ME FOR 2 YEARS. HE SUCKS.
So i startedating a russian guy. Whenever I tried talking about us , he would tell me " I dont understand" :( I was always in confusion . It made me go crazy
My narc was always gaslighting me i hated it. He would hide something I bought and placed somewhere id say I put it on the counter he laughed lifted the cooler and showed me were he hid it. Not funny
Wow…just like the movie. Gaslight, with Ingrid Bergman & Charles Boyer filmed in 1944. It’s a classic. Hope you get a chance to watch it soon, if you haven’t already.
I saw a video on the RUclips channel called "Church Militant" yesterday titled, "It Has Got to Stop". On the video several priests other than being respected by all of their parishioners who were randomly respected while often using social media too who all admitted except for 1 of them that they were ordered into rehab for having a questionable diagnosis of a mental illness right after for example a car accident or whatever which ended up costing their parishioners a whole lot. If that isn't gaslighting then I don't know what is. Another thing. Why are researchers now claiming that people who are believers tend to have lower I.Q.? Something must be off in research land instead. Another form of gaslighting is archaic laws that have been in place for much longer time than what is reasonable only to continue keeping us women or disabled people in their place. Like how assets on a farm are divided up during divorce because lawmakers still assume that women are not strong and smart enough to do farming work regardless of how much technology that is now available to them too. Which is why more very intelligent women right now are choose to become nuns while hoping that will ensure that they will no longer have to be squelching their own intelligence and limit the growth of their physical strength during their 20's while constant conforming to what is being expected of them just for being female. Sometimes that hope is realized. Sometimes depending on what order they join that hope cannot be realized since some mother superiors who have deep insecurities regardless of the fact they were born into a functional enough for them family. The mother superior is only interested in conforming to the commonplace everywhere soft bigotry of low expectations towards women while they are earning their brownie points from local priests and bishops instead of trusting the gift of womanhood too while they are continuing to grow. Wouldn't be that much of an ordeal for a woman who falls on the norm for almost all characteristics however for some taller than the norm women with a degree to be a school teacher such kind of nun in an overcontrolled richer neighborhood nunnery could end up feeling like it is a nightmare while no longer having opportunity to get enough weight bearing and aerobic exercise for their height while always having to wear a nun habit and thus no longer having opportunity for intellectual growth too. Becoming a missionary in another nation would then be their only escape from that kind of tyranny. Like what happened in mother Theresa's life.
My gran has killed her daughters , her man everything around her dies
Hi there! I absolutely love your content but something about the sound.... your voice “drops out” while you speak and makes it difficult to hear you well. Just wanted to let you know 🙂
Agreed. Great message, but hindered by audio quality. Sounds to my ear like a bit too much noise reduction.