What I've Learned From Living Alone | Over 40
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- Опубликовано: 13 май 2024
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I’m 58. I’ve been living alone for over 15 years - I LOVE it. No drama. No bullshit. The freedom is mind blowing.
Thanks. Your words give me hope.
Im going to be 40 in 3 months and I'm a little bit concerned that I like living alone too much. People ask me, dont you get lonely? I'm like nope! But I was worreid how I would feel when I get to your age, great to know that you have no regrets!!
I have been living alone for a year now 3 bedroom house with plenty of yard space. I love the echoes and empty space! I can put things down and not worry about them being moved. It's so easy to keep the house clean because I never mess things up. I only use one bedroom so the others are always clean. The bills are always paid up, one to three months in advance.
I’m not gonna lie , I love living alone too but I need some sexy time too.
@@thomaswillisstudios2198 don't feel alone sometimes
You failed to mention widowers like myself. Living alone after sleeping in the same bed for 41 years with my beloved wife. I was confronted in the peak of my grief that I could shutter myself in or start living life on my own terms. The transition from “we” to “I” is painful but I have been to movies, hockey games, concerts, walks, drives, sitting by the lake, baseball games, restaurants, church, etc by myself and it is therapeutic.
I’m sorry for your loss, BG. I’m glad to hear you are forcing yourself to be active. So important. I also encourage you, if you haven’t already, to spend time with a grief counselor. It’s a healthy step because a man who clearly loved as hard as you will hurt hard, too. But I’m really proud of you for staying active. Keep it up, friend.
@@joer8273 thank you for the advice and encouragement. I have attended, “Grief Share” a series of 12 weekly meetings and have gained both strength and healing through the experience. I believe this is not our home and one day we will be reunited.
@@Clarke16 really proud you joined a support group. We grow in community. And yes I believe wholeheartedly you will reunite in heaven. Jesus went before us to prepare that place (John 14). God bless, my friend.
Yes he did fail to mention widowers. I suddenly loss my wife/high school sweetheart after 21 years of marriage. On top of that the kids are now grown and out of the house. So I am an empty nester as well. It’s been a very difficult time living alone but I am adjusting. This is a great topic. I appreciate and enjoy this channel.
@@mthomps0 I am in a similar situation. My Sweetness of 23 years died suddenly. Suddenly everything seems pointless, the shock of being alone is traumatic. I’m trying to figure out what my purpose is. Some days and hours are better than others.
My wife liked me to dress well. Ela felt how I dressed was a reflection on her and woe betide me whenever I looked scruffy. This channel helped me lift my appearance and now, when I wear certain clothes I sort of feel she is with me. This gives me a bit of comfort.
Im in my early 50s and live alone for 20 years. I ended up that cooking is great fun! I started slow and easy, and now I can do many things. Another option guys is what I do, I cook every Saturday after shopping for the whole week, while I dance listening to my favorite music! Put the food in the fridge and eat my own food. More healthy guys, my medical exams went to normal like I'm 25 years old!!! Thank you for the video! Great, as always!!!
Love that! Thanks for commenting!
U must be a very lonely man
I do that as well and I am excited to hear that you have lived by yourself for 20 years. Society makes it seem as if men can't live on their own. That we need a woman to do everything for us. Or we have to do everything for a woman and or children and it's good to see men being able to live and do for themselves.
Similar story here,
@@EE-ie9gm Cohabitation or lack of it does not lead to loneliness. Sometimes men are better living alone.
I'm 59 and living alone for the first time in decades, and loving it. Your time becomes your own, it's a beautiful thing.
Being in a LTR has many ups and downs.;
What goes UP?
My blood pressure, body weight, cholesterol, drama, stress from in-laws, character flaws, monthly bills, purchases of items I will never wear or use and the anxiety of saying the wrong things.
What goes DOWN?
My bank account, masculinity, years left to live on this earth, contact with friends, participation in favorite hobbies, intelligence level, frequency of sex, admiring other women's beauty and the memory of whom I used to be prior to meeting them.
What NEVER goes down?
Your spouse after 1-2 years or when the ring is placed upon her finger.
True
That is excellent. Thanks for the smile
What never goes down? Spouses weight and nagging.
When I left my ex wife, I missed her so much, I thought of hiring someone to nag me and cuss me out a few times a week.
I found myself living alone in my early forties. It took some time getting used to, but now I have the opposite problem. I don’t want to share my space with anyone else. When I date, I have to make sure she has the same mindset.
I have the same mindset.. Unfortunately in my experience, it seems women around my age (50's) are all looking for their next ex-husband. After two failed marriages, I finally know what it is to live in peace and quiet. Like yourself, I can't go back to the way it used to be. My only regret is I didn't learn this sooner. Well done mate, do you!
Spot on here here..woof
I'm in that same boat
I realized it had gone too far when a GF picked up the remote to the TV and found myself thinking "that's my TV".
@@warringtonfaust1088 LOL
Hey man, great video, im 48, here in UK, single from long term relationship since last oct and living in a village in 450 yr old house
found you a week ago and my life has improved so much, i have decluttered, added plants , gone through wardrobe and re-looked at my life in general, thanks so much for all you do....
Thank you for watching!
@radio hitman Just get rid of the cats and you'll be ok when you're dead. (joke)
I am flying solo at 50. Divorced and my daughter is 19. The advice that you gave will help so many men. I am enjoying my time exploring life as an independent individual. I have been alone for over 10 years. Women come and go. It is a healthy, fun life. I may or may not remarry, but I am well aware of my beautiful freedom while I have it. The grass is green in my lawn!😃
Love it! Thanks for commenting!
As the “World’s Most Interesting Man” once said: “STAY THIRSTY, MY FRIEND!”
Damn good advice.
You can look, but it’s best not to buy.
42 and single for four years. It’s been absolutely fantastic compared to before - being unhappily married. During the divorce, it was difficult to adjust. But, as I got back to being me - doing what I like, going when I want, staying in when I want, socializing when I want. Reconnecting with old friends, hanging out with different people, and dating different people helped me to find myself again. I reconnected with my own thoughts, feelings, emotions, beliefs, and motivations. I feel like the best version of myself now.
There are some lonely moments, but that’s to be expected when I’m alone. The biggest difference, though, is I can do something about it without checking in with someone. Again, compared to before, now is so much better.
The other piece to all of this that makes my current situation better than before was all the shit I had to go through to get where I am now. ‘Now’ would not be as sweet if the divorce or transition was easy. I faced all the bad/negative feelings head on, which was hard, but it made me better in the end. The personal growth is what makes ‘now’ so sweet.
Once again, great content and I agree with your points in the video.
Thanks for what you’ve created, for what you do, and what you provide. Keep up the good work. #legend
You’re very welcome! Thank you for your comment! It’s appreciated!
So if you met someone else would you ever cohabitate again?
@@Canadian_Eh_I She would have to be a unicorn.
Now you can connect with yourself and be your own soulmate.
After divorcing after 20 years, i after getting over it ,love living alone. No placating people, no eating at a place i didnt want to eat at. No doing stupid things because someone obligated me etc. Spending my money how when and where i want. The list goes on, i cant believe the compromises i used to make just to be in a relationship. NEVER AGAIN
totally agree!!
Loved this content John! It’s what I have been looking for. :)
I can personally relate to this coming from a relationship (past life) which started off great, then turned not so good when it ended (fell apart actually), got into a state of depression like 3 years ago but I just like you, I learned to focus on myself, priorities, goals, positive outlook, prayers, re-discovering that ‘zest’ in your self, etc. It does not have to be great to start but to be great, one just needs to start. It could any small thing which makes you smile, satisfied with your day (productivity, etc., helping out a friend or a stranger, etc.)
Anyways, enough of me but more of you John. I felt relieved and a renewed sense of purpose in life once again after watching this video.
Sending you warm greetings from a world away somewhere in The Philippines!
Keep up the Good Work!
(Ituloy mo lang ang Magandang Gawa!)
- From a Filipino in Cebu, Philippines.
Cheers!
We don’t realize how many compromises we make to keep a woman. When I tell all my friends I will never get married again I don’t say stuff like that to be funny or jokingly. After years of being married I’m a battle hardened veteran.
@Dave Crazy part is we are taught the exact opposite. That we should have a wife. That we should get married and follow that road so we can live happily ever after and that men can’t survive or thrive on their own.
@@benjaminslife9424 Men have been conditioned to make those compromises, women havent. The balance of power shifts dramatically when you get married. She now can get fat, not have sex w you, be bitchy etc and your recourse is divorce where you may lose more than half your hard earned money and access to your kids. In this day and age men are much better off dating a woman and keeping the playing field level. Get fat? eject, dont want to have sex ? eject, act terrible? eject..
with no hit to your pocketbook
Great video John! I am 47 and have lived alone most of my adult life - minus a brief marriage. It has never been easy. After moving to a new state after my divorce, I lost much of network and friends. I have recently took your advice to grab dinner even if it is just me and put myself out there more. I’m hopeful of good thing ahead!
Thanks for watching Chris!
Hi mate, another great vid! 👏🏻 I'm 50 and I've lived alone for 16 years since I got divorced. You just get used to it, enjoying your own company and doing your own thing, for a majority of the time. Loneliness does tend to creep in occasionally though! Thing is, I'm so conditioned to living by myself that I can't imagine ever changing now!
Legend 👍🏻
Living alone really is not as bad as what many people think it might be. The biggest advantage is the amount of freedom a person has and you only have to answer to yourself. With that said, we are all social creatures and we thrive on having a connection with other people, so it is also very important to have some close friends to socialize with.
I found that to get on a path towards my best self, I needed to be by myself. I’m 58 and feeling and doing great. Love your content, stay safe✊🏽.
Thank you very much Kennedy!
I'm 60, feels like 40 and doing the same. Good to know your not alone
@@Jones607 You make a good point, but part of becoming my best self is knowing how to cook. I can make my own chicken soup, and I positioned myself to be able to retire in about 3 yrs if I choose. Also, I have a tight, dependable circle that will be there for me in the event I need a shoulder to lean on, just as I will be there for them. As you said sir, the pros outweigh the cons.🙂
Just turned 58 myself Kennedy ,and can definitely relate .
63 retired and don’t have to consult with anyone about anything, visit friends and family when I want, LOVING LIFE!
I am now over 50 & embrace living alone. Living alone doesn't mean I am alone all the time. I have extended family, a few good friends & occasional female company. Sure, I go out alone a lot & this sounds sad. But, I pay attention to those around me & engage them in conversation about their week & their lives. I take interest in others & generally find they take some interest in me. Foolproof? No! I leave alone an awful lot, too. That's okay, because I enjoy the company of others when I can, but take care to keep my home life quiet, uncluttered & drama free!
I only have one friend I see on occasions,rest of my friends just tend to be orbiters and want me at some function but never come round my place so that got old.
It is the best thing that ever happened to me no high blood pressure now it's back to normal and now I can focus more on my happiness and health and move forward.
I am 59 and single ..while I have many friends ,it is always a bit of a mission getting people to come out with me ...so,I mainly tend to go out by myself ,and generally tend to have a blast ,so much so that I am starting to prefer it that way...
Hey John, you are pretty much telling my story. I've been alone for about 3 years now and it was definitely a big transition. with that, I must say I'm very independent so it wasn't that hard to adapt. Advice to everyone going through the same phase, believe in yourself and enjoy me time. It will make you more confident and stronger with fewer regrets. Great video buddy thanks!
Thank you!
Well said my friend, me time is so important.
This is a difficult stage to go through.
Being alone(Bachelor) is a wonderful path to peace, wealth, and freedom. Men, don't let society/women shame you into thinking living as a bachelor a sad existence. The alternative is to get back into making someone else's dreams and lifestyle dreams come true. DO YOU!!!!!!!!
Mate..... "Making someone else's dreams". How right you are! Seriously 🙏
Spot on I'm 60 live in Colombia 🇨🇴on 1400 a month great life
Very Well Said....!
I give you credit John. You rarely if ever mention having been married. The credit is for not being bitter, but BETTER. You never spend a second on your platform maligning anyone, throwing some passive-aggressive shade, etc. it’s just all about growth and personal progress. Love that.
So you might make a number of videos on looking classy, but implicit in your videos is also constant messaging on BEING classy. Thank you, Legend.
Thank you very much Joe! So glad you recognize that!
Yeah bro I just found this John guy. It is refreshing getting a dose of non RP content. Just stuff I can use and operate on.
I love going out by myself. Always end up meeting quality people. You attract what you are.
100%! Thank you for commenting!
Been divorced for 3 years and in my early 50s as you are. It was rough financially at first, but with some goals in place I made it through after the first year of paying everything off. I live debt free as I only owe on my mortgage and household overhead. The freedom is truly amazing and would never go back to any situationship as long as I live. Thanks for sharing your insight. It's definitely my way or the highway 👍
Thanks James!
Im 50, married now 25 yrs, and miserable.
I lived on my own till about 45.
80% of the time I had no problem, and the other 20% you miss company, support when you take a major knock from life.
Primary task you must master is self discipline, as a example the dishes in the sink will not wash themselves !
If you lack the above you will fail to make the best out of your single life.
I got a simple rule that I follow, I never go to bed with dishes in the sink.
I’m turning 50 soon. I’ve been with my partner of 10 years and we lived together for a few years in that time. I moved out 4 years ago, but made the mistake of staying involved in the relationship. It is hard to live alone at first and the loneliness and negative self talk can wear you down. Take it easy, acknowledge that your life has permanently changed from what is was before. Start making small changes to improve your mental health. For me it was making my bed every morning, buying a smart watch to track my fat percentages,etc, stopping to eat at drive thru windows. I plan to start traveling internationally solo as my partner and I would either go together or with her kid. The reality is even though we are together, we have been living separate lives for years now and it’s time to end the relationship. Just wasted time holding on to a life that no longer exist or never existed.
Wow! Thank you very much for commenting!
be strong! you don't need women for anything.
Partner sounds so stupid, say boyfriend or girlfriend.
Despite living separate lives, can you still see her once in a while? If I were in your position, it looks like a good deal, man. Some companionship and sex once in a while doesn't hurt anyone. But that's just me.
You owe it to that person to end the relationship. Do it with love.
I live alone and I've never been happier. When I wake up in the morning I have a blank canvass. I go where I want to, eat whatever I'm in the mood for. I love it!!
Absolutely Edward! Thanks for commenting!
Also you can bang random woman.
What you do about sex?
@@mikeprice8307 I never said I didn't date
My GF of 20 years just passed away and now at 53 I find myself living alone for the 1st time in my life. What makes it especially hard is that we moved out of state to a smaller town and I don't know anyone in this town or state. I'm literally all alone now! I don't know a soul to go and hang out with let alone talk to & because I live in a smaller town compared to where I moved from in Southern California there isn't a lot to do here compared to California.
I have been living alone for over 3 years. Being self reliant, knowing basic handyman work, a couple of hobbies, being comfortable with solitude, and most importantly making your health and sleep as non-negotiables, are the five skills that helped me a lot. As I have grown old I realized that my peace and well being are more important than being a man of value for someone else or being right.
OHHHHHH, that's awesome. I'm still married but separated for about 3 years and moving towards divorce. At this particular moment, I'm ENJOYING living by myself, it's awesomely great. I'm learning more about myself and how I can impact people's life. As a man of 43, soon turning 44 I'm more successful in what I do, more focused, have a great self esteem, do whatever I want without approval, became an entrepreneur, became a shareholder, working towards my financial freedom. Life has become more fun. It's true that not everyone accepts leaving in this condition, but personally after a toxic, authoritative, possessive and dangerous relationship, I'm not willing to get myself involved into a commitment, that will not contribute for the better version of myself and that will not support me in striving for my goals. With that being said, I'M ALRIGHT THE WAY I'M AT FOR THE MOMENT.
This is awesome! Thank you very much for commenting! Cheers!
When my grandmother went to have a treatment at the hospital, my grandfather was barely able to cook an omelette. We really no longer have an excuse to keep relying on other people to take care of basic stuff for us. I'll gladly be the first one to invite someone for a drink, but even if I end up going alone, it's usually the only company I can fully trust to never let me down ;) Traveling alone is also a great experience since you're much more open to potential new acquaintances and organise your time the way you prefer.
I have lived alone for about 30 years, after an almost 7 year relationship ended. When you give your "heart" to someone, and say "I LOVE YOU", and that person says they no longer feel the same... it's devastating. 😭
I still feel a lack of trust, and haven't been able to get past the past. I don't want to "set myself up again", so I pull back or keep the "wall up". Yet, I do long for another relationship, but don't do anything to pursue one?🤔🤣
But I do enjoy doing what I want, when I want and have so many interests that it would be a challenge to find someone to fit in my schedule. The biggest thing I ever did ALONE, was going to NYC for a week by myself! Didn't know a single person when I got to my B&B, but for one week, I truly felt ALIVE, and it was THE highlight of my life!
It was a sense of freedom, and overpowering to my self-confidence and self-esteem. Have plans for a REBOOT trip when able.
And want to go by myself! 🤗😀
You're brave! Many people can't or don't understand the peace a person can gain from remaining single by choice.
I'm sure we can all relate to your experience. It's going to take a long time to get over the heartbreak, but use that heartbreak as a blessing in your life. Without that experience, you wouldn't know the peace, quiet and freedom you have today. I'm able to dabble in hobbies that my partner wasn't into, or didn't approve of due to cost. I no longer have to ask permission to do what I want to do, no more criticisms(big self esteem boost), no more holding shopping bags. I can understand, sometimes I look a couple and think why not me, or wouldn't it be nice to share it with someone. Then I hear complaints from my married friends about their wives and that feeling quickly goes away. Everything has pros and cons, and a sacrifice. Being single allows you to grow into the person you want to become, not the person someone else wants you to be. Also, I can relate to the lack of trust feeling you have. Instead of being told that's a negative, think of it as your intuition giving you a warning message. Live free Brother.
Thank you for your comment!! Yes, men go through devastation as well when a relationship ends. I am truly sorry for what you've gone through. Unfortunately, I have gone through the same and know it's no joke to try to move on. The one thing I refused to do was go out and pretend like I didn't care. I refused to drink away my sorrows; I wanted to feel the pain rather than num it. I am single, 43, and could retire right now if I chose to. Being single and focusing on me, instead of us, is what got me here. By the way the men that I dated were older than me. One is now 56, the other 58, and the other 62. I am beyond thrilled that they cheated on me, right now I would be a nurse to them so to speak. They all still have mortgages and so forth... Car payments, or cant do things liberally because of their bills. When I was with them, I was working hard to build something together.
I’m a woman but I love how self aware you are of your emotions and feelings. You are working through it and I hope that you can find a partner. It’s hard for both genders when you have a bunch of gamers in the dating pool.
OMG, Living alone was so great, finally committed myself 4 years ago. There's this thing called dust that i never noticed before, now i get reminded every week 🤣
Haha!
I was surprised to discover how many people (mainly ladies) equate being alone with being lonely. Two different things. Being alone is usually peaceful, hassle-free, & relaxing. You focus on YOU.
Well said!
For men, solitude is a blessing. For women, a curse.
@@Theliquidmonkey Correct. That's why we like having a "Man-Cave" or "Man-Room"...preferably with a beer fridge in it!
@@Theliquidmonkey Sorry darling, but not all women feel this way. I am a widow since 2006 and not looking for another husband. True, I would like a man in my life, BUT, I have my life and he should have his. I have come to the conclusion that I will most likely live the rest of my life alone and that doesn’t bother me in the least.
@@billieford9683 enduring it with dignity, still a curse.
I lost my wife of 35 years and eventually married another woman but that relationship is ending in divorce. Sad to say I’m looking forward to living alone at 69 years old.
Not sad at all. Just your reality.
@@FMJP Thank you for the insight but my wife and I had a long and deep discussion. We will be staying together
That's brave
I sincerely wish you much peace, and happiness Robert!
I can tell you as a single woman I was very hesitant to go out by myself and now I do it all the time and love it. I find the freedom amazing. New to your channel- love your advice.
Thank you Andrea!
Yes it's tough when you lose a really great woman. My unicorn died 5 years ago and it really hit me hard. I drowned my sorrow in whiskey for 18 months, got a bleeding ulcer and broke a vertebra when I blacked out on a stairs. That really shook me up. After a spell in hospital I started rowing and weights and went full bore keto. I hardly ever touch alcohol these days and am in good condition. I still miss her and doubt if I'll ever marry again. But I'm reasonably content, if not happy.
Thanks for sharing John!
I know how you feel I lost my wife of 17 years 2 years ago .people just don't understand you not the same after that.
Yes, this will be me in a few months, living alone after 22 years. I lived alone before I was married, and although this wasn’t the plan for age 50, I’m going to make the best of it. This video helps my mindset!
Thanks for watching Frank! Glad it helps!
Living alone is awesome. You never realize how bad of a distraction a woman is to live with until you don't. You can date. They can have their place and you can have your place. You can see each other when it works for both of you.
Thanks for commenting Ted!
@ Ted Newkirk Love your comment : "You never realize how bad of a distraction a woman is to live with until you don't." 👍🤣😂🙏🏻
She’s so good to me but I want her out so bad lol
Visa versa Ted 💪😎🔥💯
Millennials and Gen Z men aren’t dating…. Get used to it, this is a huge generational change
I am quite the pro in doing things alone, traveled solo to over 50 countries, and I often go for meals or activities alone, I also had a lot of responsibilities growing up so I rarely socialized. It takes a while to get used to the silence and the social stigma but it pays dividends when you gain a high sense of self-awareness and can focus on your goals. The trick is to audit this and make sure you are making the effort to be social, it is very easy to fall into a pattern of doing everything alone, some experiences are more rewarding when shared.
Hey John, thanks for sharing your story. Your experiences, definitely resonates with my own. It’s easy to get in a rut and stay isolated. So making yourself get out and do things is a must. Cheers!
Absolutely! Thanks for watching!
All men learn it one way or the other way. Living alone is peace, quiet, and freedom. I'm 41, never married with no kids, and I would never trade this life to end up with a ran-through 304.
100% Well said and done!
facts peace of mind over everything
What do you do for sex?
I agree except that having kids is AWESOME.
Same. This probably wont be as much of a problem for the next generation(s) (sadly, or otherwise)... most men will live by themselves for the majority of their early life and by the time they become attractive to women (age 32-37-ish), they will already be set in their ways and not NEED (or want) to live with someone who will most likely just end up taking half their stuff eventually. Thanks modern society! Overall though, some great tidbits of advice in here.
I lived for 23 years alone and it was the best years of my life. No one to answer too. And I went to the shops and bought all the things to make meals. So it made me a good cook. And I loved going to the bar that had a karaoke Saturday and Sunday nights because I am a better singer than anyone else
I’m almost in my 50s and I love this video. I love to see men not just surviving but living well on their own. I also love how clean you keep your place.
Thank you!
I agree with the positive notes on living alone. The benefits far out way the cons of being in a “toxic” relationship. I, like you, John, have a similar routine of independence. I will however make mention that as we grow older and alone we do become more selfish in our ways and develop non compromising habits. I encourage all men to have alone time and discover yourself however, do not push potentially healthy relationships away, because you have been hurt in your past.
Great content as always John
Spot on Gary! Thanks for commenting!
there is no need to deal with toxic women anymore. you dont need to have a wife, 2.5 kids and a house to be happy. men will be happier if they avoid relationships with controlling and narcissistic women.
Sorry man. Western women (USA) are way too prone to be narcissist. I’ll remain solo till I fly overseas.
Yes In can't wait to live on my own, after raising a family and putting others first I'm looking forward to me time.I'm planning a solo trip for next year, back to Europe where I'm from.I would love to to end up in Portugal longterm but will see.I also had enough of the Canadian winters ,a place in the sun by the ocean would be nice. It will definitely be a bid scary but I will learn as I go.I already made a big life change 26 years ago moving to Canada from Switzerland now it's time for a new adventure!
Sounds great! Thanks for commenting!
I was in the same boat Natalie. Until earlier this year I packed up my bags, said goodbye to Toronto and moved to Istanbul. Winters here are mild(ish), the summer is fantastic and this city is magical. Go ahead take the plunge you will regret not having done so sooner
I have been single except for a short 5 year marriage. I love living alone and I am not lonely. I thought I would be lonely, but I was not. I have a good job a house and all the things I need. I can't see myself every getting used to having someone around ever again and I don't miss men. They are kinda like pod people to me.
That's brave
64 and living alone. The peace you have is pure bliss. No drama, no problems created where there are none. I see my children and grandchildren as much as I want. Life is good.
I feel the same way. Ever since I got separated, I have traveled to so many countries alone enjoying the freedom and fun time. Made alot of friends from different countries that I can visit anytime.
Dude...I love your content. I have probably seen all your videos at least twice. I am going through a divorce and living alone again after 17 years. THIS ONE hit a home run for me. More content like this for sure. Well done!
Thank you very much!
Useful topic.
Thanks!
I've come to terms with being over 40 good looking ,have had a few girlfriends who never really satisfied me emotionally and intellectually. Being single and living alone almost 8 years, has made me a stronger more resilient person who doesn't get fooled very easily by female nature. I'm happy and love my freedom.
Thank you. I needed to hear this.
Thank you John as at times I fell really desperate of my loneliness.This video has greatly boosted up my moral.May God bless you dear.
want to save money? LEARN HOW TO COOK. Eating out is ridiculously expensive, the quality and service is terrible after the covid pandemic, and the prices are crazy. Meal prep, and you will find yourself healthier wealthier and losing weight.
Thank you for your advice, especially the part about going out and doing things on your own. I am 43, single, and live alone. Used to have a group to hang out with, but after getting a DWI, I no longer go to bars and don't see any of them anymore. I would just go to work and then home every day for the past 6 months or so.
Been watching your videos for a while and this one is very much spot on. A lot of great information as usual. Thanks!
Thanks for watching!
53 here my wife died in january, and the dating scene turns my stomach---thank God you're here- I just subcribed and joined-preach it brother
Much appreciated Scott! Sorry for your loss.
Good words, Sir! I do pay the bills online manually, just because it keeps me sharp. Auto-pay is tempting. I have 3 utilities and some credit cards. I do dishes by hand, as you do. Am getting better at cooking.
I really appreciate this video. I'm going through a very sad, difficult divorce, living now on my own for the first time since age 22. Your advice gave me some moral support and good practical ideas. Besides the light of intelligence it shines, the message made me feel a bit less lonely. Thank you sir
You’re very welcome! Thank you for watching!
Legend, I am married but my wife and myself have two different personalities. I am the cozy guy while she's messy. I always have to pick things she leaves behind and we ended fighting! I go to the movies alone, I go to bars alone, and best vacation I ever had, I went alone to Thailand 🇹🇭! I like doing things alone and working on myself! Although marriage sometimes is not bad I still believe that it is for the womens! Cheers for all the men's alone! 👍
Cheers!
G'day John, great content as always, I do have one suggestion though. As a fellow clean freak I used to always wash my dishes by hand after every meal until a friend informed me that by using the dishwasher (once it's full of course) instead of hand-washing dishes I would save a significant amount of water over time. I researched it and apparently it's true. Food for thought anyways. Cheers Paul.
Unfortunately for me I’m a very nostalgic person. I live in the past moments that gave me life, joy, and peace. I now live under the threat of having all those thing being taken away (an unwanted divorce). I have come to accept that it’s out of my control. I have done all I could to hang on to my family. I’m not a bad dad or husband, just old fashion and they are, “Woke.” That difference has throughout the years made its way into our relationship and even though I’ve made a real effort to adjust, trying for them is not enough. I feel I’m at the edge of a precipice where the anticipation of the unknown has consumed me. What awaits after I don’t know.
Hi Edward, going through the exact same thing, my wife asked to live separately, And does not want to talk about her feelings, our marriage is up in the air right now and with no direction, how’s things going for you ?
Great video John. The only activity I'm not used to doing solo is vacationing. I did take a short trip to Florida recently but doing my extended trips to Hawaii solo still seems awkward. Haven't pulled the trigger. I've been solo for 7 years after being married for 28.
#legend
Great advice for all older people, John. Love your videos! Blessings from Canada.🍁
Thank you!
Thank you so much for this very valuable listen because im actually going through this right now
John, please address this in another video, if you can. I am 55. Been living alone all my life. Never married. While I enjoyed it during my younger days up till about age 47 or so, I am now feeling very depressed, lonely, suicidal and feel I need a partner. But I find it tough to mingle with women after being single for so long. The depression part setting in is the worst. Plus I don’t have a well paying job and not financially stable. It’s taking a toll on my physical and mental health!
Fix the last part and everything else will fall in place.
Find another job that suits you better and forces you to meet people. You can drive for Uber part-time. It doesn't matter if you're talking to a man or woman. Human contact is the key. The bottom line is to get through life.
Get your testosterone level checked. I've seen a lot of research that men of your age start to feel depressed and by going on testosterone replacement they feel great again
I wouldn't want to think about living alone again, although I did for several years.
My father was 16 years older than my mother. She died at 68, after 40 years of marriage, he at 98 and he took up enormous discipline. The house never was a mess, when we visited him there were no dirty dishes, nothing. He cooked for us, made sure there was something to drink. Classical music was around always. Up to 96 years old he managed it, even when almost blind. The last 2 were a struggle, because of a broken shoulder that didn't heal. He hated it needing care.
So... I know it's perfectly possible to live an organized life alone. But my father never told me if he felt alone.
Thank you for commenting!
I completely agree with you. I live the same way you do! It's very empowering and liberating too. Congratulations!
Thank you!
Thanks John. Great tips.
Great Video John. It's all about structure and also doing something that you haven't done before to add a little excitement to every day.
Absolutely! Thanks for commenting!
I’ve experienced both married and single at different times in my life, there are pros and cons. One must find and decide what works best for them. The grass is or isn’t greener on the other side.
True story! Thanks for watching!
Great video glad you posted keep them coming thanks
Thank you!
Just tuned 39, single never married. It's a double edged sword. Sometimes I one l love being alone, and sometimes I feel lonely and miserable.
I can relate to your dishwashing habits
Another wonderful video. I can truly relate since I'm also a 50 plus single person, living alone and enjoying life. 😊
Thank you for watching Edward!
Thanks for the great video! I agree with everything that you said.
Thank you!
One of your better videos! Perfect info and perfect timing
Thank you Robert!
Great advice. I also recommend taking a solo vacation or weekend trip. Perfect way to get out of the comfort zone and make personal memories!
Absolutely!
i never took solo trips before but did it earlier this year and it was amazing. I met so many friendly people and honestly, i didn't have to pay for a second person to travel as well, which meant i could splurge a bit
Cool.. Appreciate the prepared meals idea. I was not aware there was such a thing. I'll give her a try. Thank you.
I moved back to my condo after 7 years of marriage. I totally agree with everything in this video. Being grounded by reality and free with confidence and ambitions.
I've lived on my own through choice for years - love it.
Hi,
Can I first say I thoroughly enjoy your channel, relatively new to your channel. Since viewing various different content I have learned and picked up great tips and advice, and looked at my life in general. I have been alone since my divorce nearly 5 yrs ago, however I have two great young kids a boy and girl 12 and 9 respectively. So not alone but feel alone if you not what I mean. But wanted to say thank you for this video and other videos has inspired me to do things and take a chance. Going out to eat on my own, cinema, drinks etc. Building one’s confident, working on.
Thank you and keep up the great work
Nandu (UK)
Great video, John. I can completely relate to this, as I am 51 and living on my own for the first time ever. It's been great in almost every single aspect, to be honest (except for when I caught Covid and had to self-isolate...nobody around to help, lol). Keep 'em coming!!
Much appreciated! Thanks for watching!
Single parent for 13 years. My girlfriend took a picture of my spice drawer! Didn't expect to see everything clean and labels lined up, house spotless. Her girlfriends told her not to expect much from a single man, since we are supposed to be slobs and always works in progress. Lol. You offer great advice on making ourselves feel and look great. Finding a best friend and lover is icing on the cake.
Well done! Thanks for commenting!
Plus one for Factor meals, I've been on those since February '21. I'm a weight loss surgery patient (vertical sleeve gastrectomy August 2020) and the structure and nutrition are critical for my health maintenance...along with regular exercise and more. My nutritional doctor is fully onboard with this. I don't have talent, time, or interest to cook. Pre-prepped meals (or kits) are a total lifesaver for bachelors. Thanks for your content, always interesting and helpful for men's style and lifestyle tips.
Thank you Daniel! Appreciate your comment!
I've been on my own for a good few years now and I still struggle with doing some things on my own. Some things just don't seem as much fun when you do them on your own, going out to eat being one of them.
I was in a job interview and somebody asked what were the websites I visited first thing in the morning. One of those sites was my bank. At the time, I was watching for fraudulent charges, but later I realized it also made me hyper aware of what I was spending my money on, day to day.
Like always John great video!😊keep well...and thanks for sharing..
Thanks for watching!
I was never lonelier than when I was in a terrible marriage. Now I keep a simple house, spend less than I make, got rid of the TV, spend money on what I want, meditate, workout, have groceries delivered, have “friends” over, work my hustles… living single is great.
Thanks for watching!
Got to save after having lived alone, with others and partner(s), living alone is the best.
Great video!
I’m 55 and after a thirty year marriage ended at 51 I’m living alone. At first I had a hard time eating out be myself but I’m ok now! Ditto on most of the other things except cooking. I found out I like to cook
I’m still learning about fashion and thank you for all the great advice!
I’m 41, live in NYC, I got a great career, I enjoy traveling, ballgames, cycling, photography. I do my bed first in the morning and I don’t have to deal with the BS that comes with kids and a spouse. One more thing, I’m a minimalist. Thanks for the video.
Thanks for watching!
For the majority of my early life I always had parents, siblings and at least one dog. A number of years ago all of family except one brother got old and/or sick and eventually died within two years. My last brother lives overseas with his own family and we are not very close. So I was left with just my dog and my house. Once I had wrapped my brain around reconciling the grief of losing one's family (and the strong sense of purpose that goes with caring for a fragile person) and the newfound sense of freedom to forge one's own path, the next few years were substantially simpler, almost to the point I didn't know what to do with myself.
However, when my dog eventually died as well, I took some time to really think about whether I should get another dog, since I am around that age where starting a family is not a reasonable or rational prospect anymore. It took about 2 months of living completely alone and pondering the pros and cons of getting a new dog. The decision was made when I realised that living alone might cause one to fall into a pattern of thinking only of oneself in all things. When you have nothing but your own needs and desires to consider, it may lead to an existence with a profoundly toxic lack of responsibility. In some ways this is like the thinking of a child but to me these toxic aspects (in an adult) strongly resembled those of a politically Left extremist that blindly believes that the Ends Justifies the Means. In other words, the most dangerously immature and irresponsible mindset an adult could possibly have.
So needless to say I applied to adopt a shelter dog the very next day. I think men need a sense of purpose in life (and by extension, responsibility) to stay sane in this world. Usually this comes from getting married and raising your own family but in the absence of that opportunity there aren't that many things that can replace it. Work is one option but then what do you do when you retire? You'd have to reinvent yourself and your purpose all over again. Religion is another option but that has never held much appeal for me since it contains too many incompatibilities with my sense of rational existence. Adopting a dog gives me that sense of responsibility and also the satisfaction that, through my deliberate action, I have made the life of another soul infinitely better off than before I had met them. The unconditional love and companionship I get in return is just the cherry on top.
Excellent advice. Thanks
Thanks for watching!
Thanks
John, this is GOLD!! I have been married, divorced and now my current wife has stage 4 terminal cancer. All things considered, I will be on my own again in my mid 60's. To me being comfortable and content alone is a sign of maturity and character. When I hear people use terms like soul mate or that their partner completes them I get concerned...and I am a hopeless romantic. Great video my friend, well done as usual.
Thank you Patrick!
same with my wife
Great topic , living alone for quite sometime . Needed to hear this .
Great tips, I live alone and now I'm just to it, it wasn't easy in the beginning but now I'm ok with it. Your Factor discount is better than what a subscriber referred me to, so I'll get it. Thanks for sharing
Thanks for this very different and relevant video
Thanks for watching!
Very good advises. Thanks. 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
Thanks 👍
cleaning my house lifts my mood. a dirty house puts me in a bad mood.
Simple, to the point. Subscribed
Thank you very much! Cheers!