25 things i've learned in 25 years
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- Опубликовано: 5 июл 2024
- leave your best piece of advice in the comments! i'm excited to read them all!
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☞ My name is Ariel and I’m a Canadian writer, poet, and RUclipsr. I organize my shelves by genre and then colour and my favourite book is Animal Farm. I've been making bookish content online for over 8 years and love spreading a love of reading through videos, panels, articles, and more! Think we could make something cool together? Send me an email!
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Straight from a 93 year old - “Don’t listen to other people’s advice. Nobody knows what the hell they’re doing.” I find this oddly comforting and the older I get, the more I realize how true it is.
Hi friends (Habits wisdom and mindset of highly successful people 2020) this book is Amazing it's available on Amazon and Kindle *
Thank you for this comment!! A beautiful reminder. I also don't know what I'm doing, but that's okay.
One quote that I like is “everyone has a chapter they don’t read out loud.”
I needed to hear that, thank you
I don’t get when people say “you’re so young!!!” You’re literally the oldest you’ve ever been so naturally that’s gonna be the mentality of you feeling “old” ya know?
I never thought about it like that. Thanks! :)
Of course but I think when people say that it’s a way to remind you that you still have a whole life in front of you and you don’t have to rush to do anything. It’s natural that you’re gonna FEEL a certain way, and nobody should ever tell you to NOT feel old because of course you will, but I think people mean well in telling you that you’re still young.
Thanks for this perspective, I absolutely agree
And now you’re even older. And now you’re even older. Thank you, They Might Be Giants, for writing one of the most terrifying songs ever.
I usually get this when people confronted with the fact I'm disabled and mostly housebound. It's not helpful, if anything it's hurtful and harmful for me and how society views disability. I'm surprised those who aren't in similar situations also get the 'but you're so young', though I fail to see what that would be in response to because age doesn't always equate to experience, and I think it's patronizing for anyone to be told.
* Never let your schooling interfere with your education
- Mark Twain
Sticks with me always
So true!!!! Thanks for sharing
It made me emotional hearing her talk about that and that quote just..yeah. it's so weird going from high school to uni and reprogramming my head to study for LEARNING cause I'm taking these classes for just that, learning, and not care about a test coming up or the end grade.
A lesson that took me quite long to learn but is one of the most important to me:
Wear comfortable underwear.
A simple one that I love is, "why not me?". For folks like myself who are prone to self-sabotage, it's a useful mantra.
Hey shey👊😂
Yes! I started using that mantra over 3 years ago & it has made such a huge change in how I live & see myself
I’ve learned:
1) You can’t help people Who don’t ask you for help.
2) sometimes, The things you really dislike about someone without any particular reason, are the reflection of what you don’t like about yourself.
3) (this Point goes in Hand with the previous one) accept and Love every part of yourself
4) in Order to grow you have to be Kind to yourself and not beat yourself up because you have such high expectations for yourself. Only if you start from a place of Love where you feel safe, you will have the courage to go further and grow.
5) people come and go, and that’s good. You learn from them until they leave. Then, it’s Time to learn something else from someone else.
6)we were Born in this World to live. And Not (like my materialistic father taught me) to work.
Amazing :)
Equally, you won't get help if you don't ask for it, and there is nothing shameful about needing help as everyone does sometimes.
@@anyawillowfan exactly!!!!
I’m 31 years old, and this past fall - I found out that I am dying. I had so many plans when I was in my twenties... I never could have imagined that this would be my life. The thing is, it’s been my greatest teacher. I’ve learned to look up at the stars, to enjoy the feeling of petting my cats, or savouring a good donut. It’s about the little things. God is in the details ♥️ love you Ariel! You’re not weird at all - you’re exactly who you were put on this earth to be xo
I hope you're still doing ok.
I hope you are alright.
💛🥲
My advice:
- Your mental health is important and taking care of it is nothing to be ashamed of.
Hi friends (Habits wisdom and mindset of highly successful people 2020) this book is Amazing it's available on Amazon and Kindle *
Girl...I am 28, my 20s nearly over and as 30 looms I have had SEVERAL times of existential crisis and panic attacks about like “I have done NOTHING!” And “Why didn’t you go to University?!” And I work in a cafe. Not where I thought I would be, ever. You have no idea how much I needed to hear some of these mantras. Thank you Ariel. You gave this old gal hope.
You must have done and learned so many non-university things though! I am 28, too, went to uni and god knows there are a billion things I did NOT learn there. When I started teacher training I was shocked at how I had basically never before been learning to do anything REAL and tangible. What are your favourite things you've learned?
Hi friends (Habits wisdom and mindset of highly successful people 2020) this book is Amazing it's available on Amazon and Kindle *
I went back to school at 28 to get an art degree at 31... taking classes with students older than me, with professors younger than me. And I bartend. There's no time frame for anything. I literally have 3 degrees. And now my goal in life is to use everything I have learned and my passions to start my own business. And I didn't figure that out until 35. Seriously, just flow. Do you and do what you love. I know it sounds cliche, but stay true to yourself and take no BS and it will come to you.
Also, if you've always wanted to go to school, do it. I know that a lot of people say "but you may not use your degree." And honestly, that's true. But with school you will always learn and grow as an individual. And from there you may find direction towards something else. And every degree has many different pathways to go if you do pursue it. I'm not necessarily using my degrees for work, but the first one made the third one easier for me without even realizing that they were connected. And now my future goals for my business stand to make me more successful because of my art background. I know I wrote a lot but I've had a gin and tonic and your initial post spoke to me because I totally relate and I wanted to share. I know it will all work out for you. Have a good rest of the year. :)
I feel this I'm about to be 25 and I've only been able to go to school part time and I feel like it is taking me so long to move forward with everything I want to do.
Fashion isn't permanent. Clothes that get ridiculed in high school become the new trend as we get older. Wear what you want!
As my hiking pal always says “there’s no bad weather, just bad clothes” (true 99% of the time)
The most life changing thing for me was at the end of The Perks of Being a Wallflower when Charlie says "Just because there are people that have it a lot worse doesn't change the fact that you have what you have". We need to stop comparing our struggles to other people and believing that we don't have a right to be sad about the things that make us sad. This quote has helped me so much.
If you know having animals around helps your mental health, and you're financially able, get the damn cat.
I don't know why I love this comment so much 😂
@@aishamoon698 I am glad you enjoyed haha
Me: *waiting to hear some mind blowing tea making advice*
Ariel: literally stir before you drink
also: worrying / mulling things over makes you suffer twice
One of my professors once said to the class "remember to enjoy your weekend. Being a student isn't your only identity." And that has really stuck with me for a long time.
I turned 38 this year, and I can tell you that even at my age I still feel like I was just 18 a few months ago. Even at this age, you never really know what the hell youre doing. Nobody does. Fake it til you make it and just enjoy as much of it as it goes by.
Also- take care of your knees and your back. For real.
youngen rich I wish I did. I was careless in my 20’s with bad posture and sitting at my computer/office desk without taking care of my back. And roller derby. Now my back is always hurting. I do find that back pain-specific yoga on RUclips is helpful. Also sleeping on my side with a pillow between my knees has really helped as well. Good luck! A strong core helps.
"We're all a little weird and life's a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join with them in mutual weirdness and call it LOVE" -Dr. Seuss
One of the biggest lessons I've learned is that no matter how vastly different someone's political view/world view is from yours, it's almost always worth it to hear them out and learn about why they believe and think as they do.
"The people that bring you the most peace should get the most time". Saw that on Instagram and it really resonated with me - it's applicable to staying in touch more closely with important people, spending time with myself, to choosing between yes and no to things other people propose I go and do with my time/with them, etc.
All of these, so much. And one extra: you are allowed to start learning something new even later in life! Just because you didn't start as a child doesn't mean you won't get good with practice.
One of my best pieces of advice: when you can't stop thinking about an embarrassing moment, try and remember something that someone else did that was embarrassing. Chances are, you can't think of one. Everybody who saw you do that embarrassing thing has almost definitely forgotten.
We missed u!!!
Big time!
You covered most of the wisdom I have! “A rose needn’t do anything other than be a rose in order to fulfill its destiny. It’s enough to just be you.”
Hi friends (Habits wisdom and mindset of highly successful people 2020) this book is Amazing it's available on Amazon and Kindle *
My dad is a business coach, which means his job is listening to people. His favorite advice to give people is: "Listen to understand, not to respond." Our culture talks over each other and no one is really listening. If you know what you're going to say before the person has finished speaking, you're not really listening, you're waiting to respond. Everyone deserves to be heard and understood. Give them the respect they deserve and as Lilly from Princess Diaries TV show said, "Shut Up and Listen".
my grandma once told me "you can be pleasing to people, without being a people pleaser" and this HIT HOME. oooft. stuck with me ever since
So many people need to know this, wow
advice: it's perfectly OK to put yourself first.
also Ariel thank you for inspiring me to delete Snapchat:)
My only advice is this. Always aim for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll end up among the stars. Well, not actually the stars, but you will end up in an elongated orbit around Earth with a diminishing supply of air, water, and food. So that's something, anyway.
omg sooo inspiring
The energy of this comment is immaculate
Hi friends (Habits wisdom and mindset of highly successful people 2020) this book is Amazing it's available on Amazon and Kindle *
This was so lovely! and highly relatable!
Something I've learned in my 22 years: don't let other people make you feel bad about how you spend your money! (let me add that this only works if you're not in major credit card debt or something!) A lot of the people I love roll their eyes at me when I come home with a new book as if that is somehow less valid or worthwhile than whatever it is that they spend their money on. But, at the end of the day, I'm a hardworking person and if I decide I would rather buy another copy of pride and prejudice than a new video game, new clothes, a meal out, etc. then that's ok and nobody should make me feel bad about it just because it isn't something they would buy for themselves.
my family gets annoyed every time I buy a book, and they are always saying to spend my money on something better. They make me feel bad about it so I sometimes hide it when I buy a book cause I just don't want the drama and it makes me feel depressed sometimes cause i work so hard at my job and at everything i do and for them to tell me that one of my passions is a waste of money it hurts. Thank you for reminding me that it's okay to be me and not feel bad about the things i love and am passionate about.
Late to the game on this one but "closed mouths don't get fed" has been SUCH a helpful mantra for me when it comes to verbalizing the things I want to others. I'm definitely the type to stay quiet if I'm uncomfortable or if I want something so just having that reminder in the back of my mind is so useful.
Advice : it’s ok to have that slice of cake you’ve been craving.
Thank you Ariel for this lovely video!!
Some things I've learned (I'm 26, soon to be 27):
1. It's OK to write on the walls of your own flat. It's just wallpaper, no big deal.
2. It's OK not to iron your bedclothes if it makes you too tired. Yep.
3. You NEED to get a healthy sleep every day, 5 hours are NOT enough (still struggling with that)
4. First think, then speak. Not in the opposite order.
5. Life is not a race. Competition is not always a healthy way going around things. Help others, so that all of you can win.
I'm sure there's lots of horrified English people like YOU DID WHAT TO YOUR TEA?!
I'm one of them, Sorry, continue
I’m so sorry 🙈 I’m better now!!!!
Loved these. My tip is every day is not going to be a good day but you can still do things that bring you joy in that day, nap, read, watch something.
That is A+ advice
Hi friends (Habits wisdom and mindset of highly successful people 2020) this book is Amazing it's available on Amazon and Kindle *
My best advice is what I already knew to be true but Glennon Doyle (author of Untamed) articulated it so well: "If you are uncomfortable - in deep pain, angry, yearning, confused - you don't have a problem, you have a life... you will never change the fact being human is hard, so you must change the idea that it was ever supposed to be easy." This calms me down from any anxiety-driven perch.
Damn Ariel this is such a great list. Certain ones stick out to me as things I've learned only in the last year or so - don't monetise your hobbies, you're allowed to let projects go, deal/delete, taking charge of finances - I love that I'm still learning these things because it means there's still more to learn! and I'm going to!
My piece of advise is to focus on fostering the virtues of kindness and curiosity; I think they lead to a life that excites you and brings others up with you.
I’m 19, just graduated high school last year and currently at uni. I cannot explain how much the whole ‘school doesn’t matter’ advice is true - also life changes so much in such a short amount of time after school, I feel like a totally different person and it’s barely been 12 months. School compared to uni is such a bubble and I’m sure uni compared to life is also such a bubble!. My confidence levels have improved, my mindset and perception of people and the world is so much better than it used to be - I think I’m a little less selfish now that I’ve left high school as well, although there’s nothing wrong with being a little selfish, I’m now much better at acknowledging my life is not where the world begins and ends.
(also I completely agree with the tea making :,)
I turned 25 recently and what I learned is that you don't actually need to wear make up only because your friends tell you to do so. You can go out and dress nicely with no make up whatsoever and still be beautiful. I learned to just be myself and don't do thing only because someone thinks I should do it.
Hi friends (Habits wisdom and mindset of highly successful people 2020) this book is Amazing it's available on Amazon and Kindle *
Mine is "it's not a weak move to ask for help. You don't have to do all the things yourself"
How I got over caring what others judgements/opinions of me were/are; I repeat the mantras “It’s none of my business what others think of me”; and “I am not for everyone”!
Thank you for reminding us that we do not know what is going on in others' lives.
she didn't have tea until 20- i've literally been drinking tea since i came out of the womb I'M 15 AND i'VE DRANK MORE TEA THAN IMAGINABLE (because I'm asian lol)
Same
I thought green Lipton tea was the only type of tea out there besides matcha and when I started working at a boba shop and found out about jasmine my mind was blown
Same here but I'm english 😂 one of my earliest memories is sitting at my grandma's house drinking cold tea with milk out of a sippy cup hahaha
You can dress weather appropriate AND look good!!
So sorry to hear that you guys are being evicted, I know how happy you were to move there and how much work went into making that space your own ❤️️ I hope everything works out for you and your family, whether that be you being able to stay in your house or you guys finding somewhere even better that you love even more!
Don't allow anyone to treat you badly just because u like them. Always stand up for yourself
This is the first comment I've ever left on a video but I wanted to say that what you said about school pretty much sums up my whole life. I graduated from university a couple years ago and I've been struggling with stepping away from school and not pursuing any further education and right now it feels as though I'm never going to get past this feeling of defeat and like I've failed my younger self who valued school more than anything else in the world.
Again, don't know why I'm leaving this or if you'll even see it but I guess I'd like you to know that what you said is something I'll be coming back to a lot this next little bit while I try to get through this period of my life. Thank you.
Thank you for leaving me your first comment 💕💕💕 I don’t think you’re failing at all: it sounds like younger you didn’t know what older you would be like! You have to respect and love your current needs 🌻
Hi friends (Habits wisdom and mindset of highly successful people 2020) this book is Amazing it's available on Amazon and Kindle *
Thanks for the reply! I guess I’ll just have to come to terms with the fact that I’m just figuring life out as I go and hopefully I can learn to live in the moment :)
Don’t gaslight yourself! I saw this somewhere recently and it was very much a “that’s what I was doing” moment. I had to take a leave of absence from uni last semester because I was too tired to go to class or do homework and making that decision was so hard as everyone at my uni is tired, but that has a different meaning then everyone and you need to stop questioning what you know is true
I really like the saying "Be more, appear less" because there are so many layers to how you can interpret it. I generally see it as focusing on cultivating yourself for yourself rather than doing things in order to be seen a certain way, but as an extrovert it also reminds me to pull back and observe rather than dominate situations.
My best advice came from Abraham Lincoln "Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." I just survived cancer and 5 surgeries and people seem surprised at how happy I am. Seriously? I'm still here! I have no time to waste acting pissy.
'Everything in moderation. Including moderation.' - Nigella Lawson :)
Thank you for making this video! I really needed to hear this, this year. 💖
“What goes up must come down.” I remember this quote from 5th grade. Applies to so much in life.
i freakin love the energy you give out, ariel... thank you for bringing this positive video omg
I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE BACK
Love this so much. You have such a refreshing sort of gentle and freeing perspective ❤️ So much wisdom in 25 years! Thank you so much for sharing this !
I just loved this video and the thoughts it brought. And the "school isn't everything" is so true and I have to remember that all the time.
happy birthday! thank you for this
very introspective and accessible points!! thank you for sharing
This video had such a calming effect on me. Thank you, Ariel.
This video is so calming and reassuring 🌙
I really loved this. Please make more advice videos!
I love you, you are great. seriously, your videos are so calming to me, and make me laugh, and make me think and make me confortable and a lot of other things.
This is by far my favourite video of yours. you are so well-spoken and inspiring. I didn't even read the comments until the end which is very rare for me, because I always have to be doing more than one thing at a time. I just wanted to say thank you, and Happy birthday Ariel.
Your vibe is so pretty!
I really admire your way of thinking and love your channel 😊
Genuinely missed seeing your notifications pop up! Glad to see this in my sub box!!
Arielle been that relatable queen from timeeee🙏🏽🎊
Every point you made was PERFECT and absolutely worth hearing!
i have watched my fair share of these types of videos, and i have never gotten so much out of one of them than i have with this one. thank you, really loved listening to you!
1) mental health comes first ALWAYS. I don't put time into things that aren't making me happy or worse, are actively triggering my anxiety and depression
2) just like you'll forget high school, you'll forget a lot of joyful moments as well. Keep a specific journal for the things you appreciate, moments or interactions that made you happy. It's so nice to look at as a reminder of happy things, especially when you're feeling down, and it helps you consciously express gratitude
3) explore what makes you happy, especially if you're young and not financially burdened. Work the minimum wage job you love, sell art, etc if you're still living with your parents. Do it before your life revolves around making money and paying bills. Hopefully your passion will grow into a career!
4) learn how to adapt to the ways people communicate. Learn your partner's love language so you can love them in the way THEY understand best. Likewise everybody has different morals so be mindful that you're speaking to people in a way that they will be receptive to. You will communicate more effectively and build stronger relationships
5) sleep! Eat! Take care of yourself, it makes a difference!
6) your friends will change. Appreciate them while you have them but understand they are growing and sometimes they will grow away from you or you from them.
7) talk to a therapist! Fuck the taboo, it can be your secret if you're that worried about it. They're so helpful for relieving stress and processing things big or small in your life. There's nothing wrong with it and it doesn't mean anything's "wrong" with you
I really really needed this video Ariel, I literally teared up because of how reassuring this is. Thank you. Hugs xoxo
Ok so I love how comfortingly lighthearted and yet deep these are❤ 🌻
Our biggest troubles create our biggest compassion for others. Being kind is one of the few things that hopefully people have gained during this pandemic.
This video was so cute and also I really needed to hear a lot of these things. Happy belated birthday, Ariel!!💖🎂
my my what a ride it was ! i just discovered your channel and dayum am i happy this video made me feel idk hopeful? and kinda looking forward? thank you ! i just loved it 🤗🤗🤗
The first one got me. Love you, Ariel!
Great advice! I hope you have a wonderful birthday and I'm so glad you shared your thoughts at this stage of life. These are lessons even for this 28 year old.
Love this! I turned 21 this year but I totally relate to what you said in the beginning about not really being able to experience being your current age because of 2020.
Thank you for this video and the advice, Ariel! I'm sorry to hear about the eviction, that must be difficult. Happy early birthday, I hope you have a great day when it arrives :)
you look beautiful ariel! missed you sm! so excited to watch this video when i get home
I cannot even begin to explain how important this video is. thank you 💗🌿
Love this video Ariel!! The older I get the more I realize how much we don’t know, how all of us are just trying to navigate through life in our own ways. 💖
Ariel, you don't know how much I've missed your videos!
I still remember when you cut your hair and made a video. Has it really been that long? 😱😱
My greatest life lesson so far is that you should never rely on motivation. When I was younger I wasted so much timing waiting for motivation to do stuff I didn't want to do. Turns out that sometimes you just have to start, even if you don't like it or hate doing it. For me that's basically studying. I failed one of my uni classes because I kept putting of writing my essays.. Because I just didn't feel motivated and rather wanted to spend time doing anything else basically. When I found out I has failed because my last minute work hadn't been good enough this time. Before I always managed to finish my papers the day they were due and even got great grades. Finding out that this habit didn't work out that time.. well, it was a horrible feeling... But, of course, there was no one to blame but me...
I wish I could say that incident was my wake up call but sadly it wasn't.. It took me some more years to finally figure it out. 🙈
Your first lesson reminded me of the saying "this too shall pass". I think about this a lot
Firstly, it's LOVELY to see you posting Ariel. Always brightens my day, and this was especially lovely. I also deactivated my twitter THIS WEEK! And I still, like, go to the twitter webpage. I don't log in, it's just a little addiction that I'm still trying to kick.
Also downloaded a google chrome extension this week that removed the news feed. Deactivated it one time to look at my news feed and immediately regretted it. That being said, I'm going a little crazy from NOT having social media. Almost don't know what to do with myself. I'm sure, when I actually figure out how to handle myself, it'll be really nice. And not just a shit ton of youtube lol
Really good video, I like it. I’m around 26 and a half now, and I relate to what you’re saying... Thank you for letting me feel that I’m not alone and it’s okay the better is coming! 🙏✨ Ride the Wave 🌊 😁
This was so great to watch! I turned 26 last month and am still in a bit of a crisis not knowing what I'm doing in life haha
Love how uplifting your personality is! :)
I loved this video and I am about to turn 26 as well so It felt so good to hear you out and the positive vibe after all that years of knowledge was the cherry on top. Thanks for sharing
this video and the comments below really pulled me out of a bad/anxious place today :) i love your content, ariel - it's so nice
I had the exact same experience in my master's program, and it made me reconsider my entire identity. All great tips, great to see you again!
As I've grown older, learning something every day through videos and books has been my leading line. This is not something I see in all my peers and it saddens me. Hopefully they will one day learn the joys of it too (or find joy elsewhere) Thanks for this amazing video, you touched a lot of very beautiful and valuable lessons here, ones I will remember for awhile
Thank You for this video. As someone who turned 26 in March my life has changed so much this year alone and is now going through another completely unexpected and confusing change and I needed to hear these. Something I have learned since being 26 is that your mental health comes before everything else.... including your dream job that you have worked towards for the last ten years. Nothing compares to being able to rest and reset. And how I wish more people understood that you never know what battles others are facing especially during a year like 2020
This is a great video! Thanks for sharing what you've learned.
Love this so much! Feels like an old sister catching up with me and giving me life advice as we sit in cosy blanket, drinking a warm cup of coffee🥺
No one is looking at you the way you’re looking at yourself!!!
Thank you for this video, so much love for you❤️ happy early birthday xo
I'm watching and getting really emotional, i know I'm 2 months late but I really really needed this, I can't be more grateful!❤️
Every time I watch your videos I feel like I’m having a great conversation with a friend ✨💕
I LOVEEEEEEEEEEEE your videos. You are the most interesting and fun person to watch. You honestly teach me a lot. So never stop making videos plz thank you :)
Btw your videos are so pleasant to listen to I feel like I’ve been just sitting down with a kind, intelligent friend having a nice conversation.