Helen Fisher, Ph.D: Why People Fall in Love

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  • Опубликовано: 24 окт 2013
  • Full video from Being Human is available at: fora.tv/2013/09/28/human_relat...
    Helen Fisher presents study findings on why people fall in love with one person and not another.

Комментарии • 146

  • @AlfredoBodega
    @AlfredoBodega 4 года назад +51

    The most romantic thing I saw lately--an elderly couple walked to their car, the lady had a walker. Her husband gently, patiently helped her into the car.

  • @iviewthetube
    @iviewthetube 10 лет назад +23

    This is the best video I have seen on this subject, ever.

  • @peggywarner9481
    @peggywarner9481 4 года назад +21

    MY LOVE FOR MY HUSBAND DID NOT STOP WHEN HE DIED...WE WERE MARRIED FOR 40 YEARS...WE COULD NOT HAVE SEX FOR 20 YEARS...I WOULD HAVE DIED IN HIS PLACE...MY HUSBAND WAS LIKE STEVE JOBS...THE LOVE OF MY LIFE...LIKE THE BEATLES SAID...ALL WE NEED IS LOVE!!!!

  • @shop970
    @shop970 7 лет назад +17

    Don't forget that this is really about how our own chemistry always denotes our outcome! Not about cultures. Beliefs. Or social economic habit patterns! She is unique in taking apart one of life's greatest natural powers. . . . LOVE

  • @johnjohnson3709
    @johnjohnson3709 5 лет назад +8

    Being in love is just a state of mind. Some people treat it like it’s a terminal disease.

  • @greyperry
    @greyperry 7 лет назад +6

    This is really interesting oh my, thank you Helen Fisher

  • @yorocco1
    @yorocco1 4 года назад +4

    Wow! Amazing talk! She is brilliant, funny and captivating!!

  • @joefriendly
    @joefriendly 9 месяцев назад +2

    I offer this scientific breakthrough about love: people of birthdays 6 months apart are typically the most compatible and feel profound mutual appreciation for the way the other's nervous system works. They are the best mates. Why birthday is so important: it amounts to phase of the flow of solar energy to the newly born's environment that humans have evolved to respond to with particular neural networking patterns.

  • @Bloated_Tony_Danza
    @Bloated_Tony_Danza 4 года назад +9

    We fall love, we don’t step into it

  • @halloooo1duuuuu
    @halloooo1duuuuu 4 года назад +4

    Wow! What an interesting talk, brilliant conclusion!

  • @thejuicyroma
    @thejuicyroma 7 лет назад

    Amazing video and presentation!

  • @108untoldstories
    @108untoldstories 4 года назад +17

    Just because you can observe "love" in the physical it doesn't mean it doesn't have layers, that there is not a more metaphysical aspect to it that we can't observe. Weird to see people use current science to say "well, that's all there is", as if our science, limited by our physical senses to observe and document, is all there is to the complexity of this reality.

  • @helnoftroy
    @helnoftroy 5 лет назад +3

    wow! she is amazing !! outstanding speaker

  • @Misslotusification
    @Misslotusification 4 года назад +8

    11:48: ROMANTIC LOVE = ADDICTION

  • @ramirenriquez6795
    @ramirenriquez6795 4 года назад +6

    I can listen to her all day. Her last message felt too short

    • @sunshineyyyy
      @sunshineyyyy 5 месяцев назад

      Me too I bought her book audiobook and have watched every scrap of her digital footprint

  • @drexelmildraff7580
    @drexelmildraff7580 4 года назад +4

    Fascinating talk from the brilliant Helen Fisher.

  • @PolarJoMcKay
    @PolarJoMcKay 9 лет назад +46

    so valuable, lovely woman, funny, brilliant, direct and compassionate. Why we love who we love - I enjoyed every minute. The cautionary tale, to me, is how clear it becomes that only when we are mature enough to be honest with ourselves and then willing to present a more accurate 'self' can we hope to find a real match...bee yourself if u wanna find ur honey (lol, so much sugar I know :) sorry bout that :)...) worth some thought for sure. #Love #ScienceofLove #FindingYourMatch #CharmingScientist

    • @jacquelineyu4474
      @jacquelineyu4474 8 лет назад +1

      agree with Polar Jo. Also big applause to dr. Helen Fisher. very useful information in terms of relationships. The talk was presented in a funny pleasant n friendly way. Enjoyed it so much. Thanx for the work.

    • @jacquelineyu4474
      @jacquelineyu4474 8 лет назад +1

      one problem of people nowaday. they have problem being their own self. they are just pretending to be someone else as d norm of d world says so. n thus creates all kinds of other problems in consequences. sad.

    • @melseligsohn8904
      @melseligsohn8904 6 лет назад +1

      Polar Jo you

    • @melseligsohn8904
      @melseligsohn8904 6 лет назад

      Polar Jo I can uf

    • @hadramyahmed3033
      @hadramyahmed3033 6 лет назад

      Polar Jo ind f y

  • @rafaelvalle9655
    @rafaelvalle9655 6 лет назад +2

    por favor. ...mais palestras com legendas.....precisamos desde conhecimento....grato!

  • @ThanasisVydouras
    @ThanasisVydouras 4 года назад +5

    9:12 The more you can't get them the more you like them

  • @madisoncameron3109
    @madisoncameron3109 7 лет назад +6

    she's good

  • @bexyevans777
    @bexyevans777 9 лет назад +12

    Yes, love is the most important thing in the world.
    The most beautiful thing in life, and true love is eternal happiness. :)

    • @therandje
      @therandje 9 лет назад

      Love is what we are!

    • @bexyevans777
      @bexyevans777 9 лет назад

      More love videos should be promoted, as then more love can be recognised again.
      Because sometimes, there just isn't enough love around. Randje *********

  • @ursulabudnik1979
    @ursulabudnik1979 4 года назад

    brilliant. COngratulations!

  • @richardmabe4186
    @richardmabe4186 4 года назад +12

    Romantic love is a dangerous illusion.

  • @sonamchoegyal1688
    @sonamchoegyal1688 5 лет назад +1

    Your English language is really super

  • @4amodeus
    @4amodeus 5 лет назад +2

    I would like to hear Dr. Fishers definition of LOVE.

  • @MaryyyamA.
    @MaryyyamA. 6 лет назад

    Could you reupload Jeremy Irons's and Jeffrey Archer's talk please?

  • @yichispiritual
    @yichispiritual 4 года назад +1

    Even if there is some correlation between attractions and brain activity, it doesn't mean brain activity is the cause of attraction.

  • @asalane20
    @asalane20 4 года назад +9

    She says the same thing in every talk

  • @carolebrault1982
    @carolebrault1982 3 года назад

    Is that Dr. Laurie Santos sitting on the stage?

  • @carolsampietro9873
    @carolsampietro9873 8 месяцев назад +1

    Well, I have all of the positive attributes and still here I am alone? Why? Science or spirituality?

  • @lilyjane1011
    @lilyjane1011 5 лет назад +8

    if only it was fool proof to fall in love with the person that was right for us....

  • @fdme33
    @fdme33 8 лет назад +14

    she should write a book about how not to fall in love

    • @BCFC954
      @BCFC954 7 лет назад +4

      What a terrible life.

    • @Pfirtzer
      @Pfirtzer 5 лет назад

      If life wasn't terrible God himself would have came to earth and live the life we live.So he made us and plays games with us

    • @lyonessetech6926
      @lyonessetech6926 5 лет назад +2

      @@PfirtzerWe are given the Holy Spirit, the Comforter to be with us. Who is also God.

  • @spheric1
    @spheric1 4 года назад

    The audio isn't working on this video.

  • @cepman26athus
    @cepman26athus 3 года назад

    So.... where is this survey?

  • @glockwood7033
    @glockwood7033 4 года назад +4

    Love is brain reaction..

  • @mariamkinen8036
    @mariamkinen8036 4 года назад

    No excuses needed. Pheromones.

    • @dlizzy3835
      @dlizzy3835 4 года назад +1

      Maria Makinen Really? Even when the lovers in question are not in close proximity?

  • @sfreiman00
    @sfreiman00 10 лет назад

    How old are you?

  • @mattyisagod
    @mattyisagod 10 лет назад

    not bad

  • @w.d179
    @w.d179 6 лет назад +5

    love most of the time a pain in ass just my opinion SMH most likely complicated than mutual ... I don't need this love .

  • @cjennings6179
    @cjennings6179 4 года назад

    Hormones are HUMAN CHEMISTRY ACTIVITIES creates an EMOTIONAL FEELINGS.!!!

  • @JJJennings007
    @JJJennings007 4 года назад +3

    Humans fall in and out of love.

  • @sophieaya155
    @sophieaya155 5 лет назад +1

    Have no comment

  • @danmarcs3
    @danmarcs3 8 лет назад +7

    My guess (and it is a guess) is that Dr Fisher has been moulded by her own upbringing cultural ancestry- this has shaped her orthodox and reductionist perspective. That said, I have great respect for her erudition and accomplishments.

    • @jessiejas3667
      @jessiejas3667 8 лет назад

      +Daniel Sieff agree !!!

    • @23gregorius
      @23gregorius 7 лет назад +1

      This is a wonderful American approach. Would ever a French person make such a presentation ? One thing is certain. Her approach is a good try. But love cannot be measured and understood by reason. Love is something beyond reasonable categories. There is one approach she has not touched and that is tantra. It is the superficial attitude of the westerners who pretend to know . It is somehow tragic this attitude. Arthur Avalon described the various ways of tantra in his short article "Shakti and Shastra". He wrote it in 1918. Dr. Fisher refers to the Greek philosopher Plato; fine that is what the west has come to. If she had studied Indian spirituality she would find that there are two kinds of love. Divine love as shown in the rose - beyond any description. You find it in expressions of the saints. It is also a bit in the Christian faith. Dr. Fisher should/could have delved into this field.
      Human love has innumerable forms. According to tantra any union of woman and man - in whatever form is a holy act. One is the love which comes like a lightening to both partners - often from totally different cultural upbringing. An American girl from a very rich family with hobbies like riding and playing bridge meets an Italian musician, a singer. Both fall blindly in love and marry against both parents will. He is quite successful and she brings up the 3 children. When these pass 15 years slowly the differences of the happy parents come to the forefront and separation is - in the USA - normal. Less in Italy or France because when the grandchildren have come the grandparents forget their negative behavior. In the USA such family life is rare. But what is behind the sudden love lightening? Well, it has happened more than often in the past, but with western mentality it is not easy to grasp - even the question. Well, we all have a soul and the soul is eternal. OK ? If you agree fine. This basic concept is difficult because you cannot see a soul. So, when a soul wants to start a new life it is looking, looking for its parents and when it found them it showers them with its love and so the parents to be suddenly are attached to each other.

    • @beccareynolds4625
      @beccareynolds4625 6 лет назад

      She has a theory... it is just that. I don't think it's because of her socialisation. I do think that allot of what she is saying is totally right. There is allot of evidence to credit what she is talking about. Love is obviously different for everyone it is shifting, always changing, like the ocean, like the moon, we can not love the same all the time just like we don't always feel in a state of sadness etc... But the fact that love has evolved as the human species did makes total sense that is not to say we did not fall in love before but the modern day relationships that we have or at least the common monogamous relationship where love is focused on that one special person has developed out of the way we evolved and how our environment and how our brains also evolved etc..

    • @badm33ts3vil
      @badm33ts3vil 5 лет назад +1

      While I can't attest to the validity of what she is asserting and concluding, I've seen the statement you make numerous times in videos like this.
      It's a misleading statement when directed at an individual without the underlying notion that it applies to all earthly beings.
      Everyone is molded by their own upbringing, genetics, etc. which provide the lens with which they view the world, she is no different.

  • @rajsingh2125
    @rajsingh2125 9 лет назад +2

    can someone tell me which styles of brain systems match with which? I'm a guy and I'm certainly in the 4th category

    • @jusheda5926
      @jusheda5926 9 лет назад +2

      Raj Singh Explorers matched with explores, Builders with builders, directors with negotiators, and then negotiators with directors.

    • @alienshavevideostoo
      @alienshavevideostoo 8 лет назад

      +Raj Singh I think you will go well with the 3rd Category, which is the Directors. She mentions that the first two categories tend to be drawn to people of same personalities. While the 3rd and 4th brain systems tend to be attracted to their opposites.

    • @chetanuppal3394
      @chetanuppal3394 8 лет назад

      +Raj Singh read her book "Why Him ? Why Her ?

  • @iviewthetube
    @iviewthetube 10 лет назад +5

    ♫ "She blinded me with science...
    I can smell the chemicals
    Blinding me with science - science!"♫,

  • @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716
    @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716 5 лет назад

    Helen. Bradley. Have. Good. Day

  • @debbielee133
    @debbielee133 8 лет назад +1

    This talk prompted me to try out the dating website that is associated with Dr. Fisher. Don't do it folks. It's bad news.

  • @debbielee133
    @debbielee133 8 лет назад +1

    Oh, that website is chemistry.com. Just suffice it to say, it's replete with con artists and scammers. And the customer service functions of the site are dysfunctional.

    • @mcpartridgeboy
      @mcpartridgeboy 7 лет назад +1

      you dont need a dating site your beautiful and if your not getting chatted up by lots of men its their loss !!

  • @cjennings6179
    @cjennings6179 4 года назад +1

    Human imagination desire for. Choices.

  • @jaredfontaine2002
    @jaredfontaine2002 10 лет назад

    26

  • @peacesound1101
    @peacesound1101 9 месяцев назад

    All true, but the cultural programming is so deeply embedded it cannot be distinguished between nature and moving nature into the proper avenues. Mating, "brain systems", we're still a long way from understanding love, but it's good to try.

  • @Zeddicus1976
    @Zeddicus1976 4 года назад

    She's a super talent. She also performs under the pseudonym Helene Fischer as a German singer: ruclips.net/video/haECT-SerHk/видео.html

  • @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716
    @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716 5 лет назад

    Etana. Beltzer. Nice x But. She. Moving

  • @rachellefiriro
    @rachellefiriro 10 лет назад +2

    Something is very flawed with this study!

    • @IamBHM
      @IamBHM 9 лет назад +1

      rachellefiriro Oh yeah? What do you think the flaw is?

    • @dogstick12
      @dogstick12 5 месяцев назад

      she tested a hypothesis, she never tested love

    • @user-hq2cl5wb7i
      @user-hq2cl5wb7i 4 месяца назад

      Shutp up

  • @cjennings6179
    @cjennings6179 4 года назад +1

    Sex addiction drive (wanting / a need, obsession imbalance.

  • @BCFC954
    @BCFC954 7 лет назад +2

    The irony of the politics behind this and what my brain favors: Dopamine and Testosterone; considering I support limited government in almost every instance due to their failure to manage our money. Hilarious that Hillary Clinton, Obama, and "Democrats" are linked to my circuitry and are what I despise. Also crazy that I have the similar jaw structure of Jobs and that Helen has linked this to high testosterone, of which I typically display the most.

  • @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716
    @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716 5 лет назад

    I hate i live. Middle. No. Where. Sad. Becca. Stopped coming. Around. I miss. Ashley. Bohnart. Even. Though. She. Lives. The. Virgo life

  • @Pfirtzer
    @Pfirtzer 5 лет назад

    LOVE SUX

  • @harusantakayanagi7096
    @harusantakayanagi7096 7 лет назад

    👍 ^ ^

  • @AiyanaTheStar
    @AiyanaTheStar 3 года назад +4

    Dopamine- Fire Energy
    Serotonin- Earth Energy
    Testosterone- Air Energy
    Estrogen- Water Energy
    I feel the compatibility of one soul to another can be explained through astrology

  • @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716
    @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716 5 лет назад

    Summa. Kate. Have. Fun caming

  • @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716
    @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716 5 лет назад

    Got. Laugh. Little. Things. In laugh. Married. Homie. Summa anna

  • @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716
    @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716 5 лет назад

    Im. Excited. Leave. Childrens. Hospital. For. New. Doctor. Mom. Likes. Dr. Tk. Though. Cause. Had. Him. I miss. Doctor. Not. Waiting. Room

  • @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716
    @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716 5 лет назад

    If. X Katie. Kestner. Didnt. Live. Far away. I date. Her

  • @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716
    @keeferdiejesusreallovemeto3716 5 лет назад

    Emily. Kiss andrew

  • @danmarcs3
    @danmarcs3 8 лет назад +3

    There is credibility to evolution obviously;
    but Darwin partly copied Russell Wallace (who could not publish his works/from a lower class)
    Darwin was not the sole founder of evolutionary theory. (Bruce Lipton 'Spontaneous Evolution')
    A lot of his work stems from Russell Wallace. Lyell, Hooker- 'The Delicate Arrangement.'
    Actually- the understanding in the animal world and from Wallace is- survival of all but the least fit.
    SURVIVAL OF ALL BUT THE LEAST FIT.
    Different from.
    SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST.
    Darwin in later years actually began to credit the Lamarckian concept of the environment as a driving force in evolution
    rather than struggle over scarce resource.

    • @matthewdaley137
      @matthewdaley137 7 лет назад

      ...survival of the fittest = greater survival of the best fitted to the current environment....?

  • @pyroslavx7922
    @pyroslavx7922 5 лет назад

    1:25 huray, that's like half of major neurotransmitters ;-)

  • @mcpartridgeboy
    @mcpartridgeboy 7 лет назад

    dont need to see the video theres a perfectly logical explination, we only have 1 baby, so unlike fish we need to care for that baby, its extremely inconvienient to look after babys so to keep both parents together long enough for the baby to be able to look after itself we need love. Its just a trait from the past that will hopefully die out soon because we dont need that shit anymore, its a stupid primitive feeling that we should have grown out of now but sadly havent, hopefully though with the rise of feminism no one will ever love agian, its all about sex now, wich is much better !

    • @florencenoeman1113
      @florencenoeman1113 6 лет назад

      her research were no made in the goal to prove or search how to keep parents together to raise a kid. you focus on one sentence that she said and make your own story. er research was to prove that love is a chemical reaction that happens in our brain.

  • @rickyblinkeye
    @rickyblinkeye 4 года назад

    This world is small u fall in love you fall,, love is not a match, love is an equation...make it work.. where's the dislike button...... Death is real... Willing to die can be made up.bad video

  • @sema7197
    @sema7197 9 месяцев назад

    Trying to normalized cheating its not a good thing

  • @lisaryan987
    @lisaryan987 4 года назад

    Too political should have said that in the title

  • @keving690
    @keving690 6 лет назад +4

    Very liberal California type - everything is no God, not spiritual. Everything is evolution and chemicals.

    • @adcreel9079
      @adcreel9079 4 года назад +2

      God created evolution and chemicals too...
      silly goose ✌😺

  • @crwlh6721
    @crwlh6721 Год назад

    Still didn't answer the question of "why." This answers what area in the brain is triggered & involved in the process, but not why. These same areas are probably also triggered in other pleasurable events. I think it's about "chemistry" and she's an anthropologist, so not qualified to answer this question. Pheromones & other chemical reactions need to be studied - and will probably someday answer the question of why.

  • @MrBushrulz
    @MrBushrulz 5 лет назад +1

    Her politics make me puke

  • @RevGary
    @RevGary 10 лет назад +2

    She has made numerous claims that are simply erroneous. This is more her religion than it is science. Her quips about Democrats & California speak volumes. Far too many variables yet she makes numerous assumptions as if they were fact with an unhealthy habit of citing famous celebrities. Her comments about women being more creative erroneous too. Pseudo-scientific hokum.

  • @innocentchild9414
    @innocentchild9414 2 года назад

    women who have been with more than 2 men cannot form long lasting relationships, that arent extremely serving to her

  • @RevGary
    @RevGary 10 лет назад +2

    There we go at the end she gives the game away citing Charles Darwin so she's an evolutionist aka a fool. She has no credibility for she has fallen for human thinking rather than the higher order that is creator's philosophy. Yet more proof why women should only have certain roles. Amazing how she got a round of applause for it was the blind leading the blind.

    • @23gregorius
      @23gregorius 7 лет назад

      Oh, you could be a bit tolerant. When a child does something wrong we explain with patience not to do it again. Darwin found what and how the ever gracious Divine had worked. Darwin did not see that all this development came from the Divine, but is this sooo bad ? Your concept comes from the Genesis, which is to some extent true. Myself I am born protestant, but studied Indian spirituality and so became more tolerant. Dr. Fisher's approach is totally wrong. Love can never ever understood by reason or the intellect. She followed the trend what most Americans want to hear. That Dr. Fisher did not say that women and men are equal in love that is completely in line with today's trend. I can understand it because women have been treated wrongly and why ? If you read "The Greek Myths" by Robert Graves you get a clue. The attitude of the old bible and today of the catholic church towards women is a reaction to the prior situation of men in the matriarchal area. At this time we men had an extremely difficult life (mildly spoken).

    • @ScribblebytesWorldwide
      @ScribblebytesWorldwide 4 года назад

      Also, you can't throw the baby out with the bathwater. It was God's plan that she be inspired by Darwin, what matters is the work she's doing now which helps us facilitate the processes we need to conclude our work.

    • @aue82a
      @aue82a 4 года назад +1

      clearly not in a relationship, it would seem, Gary.

    • @donotreply8979
      @donotreply8979 2 года назад

      Ok incel

    • @RevGary
      @RevGary 2 года назад

      @@donotreply8979 oh look 😂 a pathetic attempt at shaming language coming from a harpy who has smashed the wall. N. B. The wall remains Undefeated enjoy your boxes of wine, empty bed and cat poo 💩🍷🙀🐱🤣😂