Being born male, the only think I ever really struggled with that was directly correlated to me being a “man” is the expectation of those around me to be traditionally masculine. Growing up I felt that I had to hide part of myself from most people I talked to, even my dad, so that I wouldn’t be judged for being different. All in all, fuck gender stereotypes…
YO fucking same. Except I needed to be both “masculine” enough to fight my father but “feminine” enough to do all the chore and rear my siblings while also being a good docile little girl. Shits fucking wild.
i hope youve been able to be more comfortable with yourself and who you are regardless of what people around think you SHOULD be - fuck gender stereotypes to hell
All in all, fuck gender. It's not necessary at this point in the development of humanity. It feels like every personality trait always has to be connected to a certain gender for no good reason. And there's no good reason why we can't we just go through life and not have to worry about arbitrary stuff like that.
@@xx_remi_xx5211 gendered expectations are bullshit on either side of the aisle. Funny part is I'm non binary and used to think people were bullying me by asking if I'm a girl or a boy. Now I'm like "hm I guess they were just unwittingly affirming my gender!" Now my gender expectations are "why do you have boobies and wear cute femme clothes if you're non binary" lol
7:30 okay but as a woman I've literally been denied and accused of lying from DOCTORS because of my womb/uterus because "have you considered you're on your period" ...the 'period pain' the doctor tried to insist on was my apedix bursting
there’s also studies showing that women’s pain is often disregarded compared to men. this is literally bc of misogyny. women are considered to be over dramatic while men showing pain is considering more serious bc they are thought of as being “stronger” or whatever so when they show pain it’s like “oh wow that guy must really be in pain if it’s this visible/audible”
@@irisa7747 not to mention women have a much higher pain tolerance than men, because they are so used to feeling it! So when women complain about unusual pain, it should be, if anything, more concerning than men do. A lot of women receive delayed treatment because they either don’t realise that their pain is something serious, or aren’t taken seriously by doctors! They receive pain medication later on average after asking for it, and their concerns are often dismissed. Women tend to not realise when they’re having a heart attack because they mistake it for cramps. My mother is a perfect example, she had a pulmonary embolism, and only realised it was serious 12 hours later. If it wasn’t for our family friend who is a doctor, the hospital would have taken too long to check her heart and she would have died. I find these videos so stressful because these men are so delusional it’s insane!,
I know right. We aren’t a fucking hivemind, dude. You don’t know ALL WOMEN. If I said all men are violent and abusive they would lose their shit but they’re perfectly okay saying all women are golddigging whores REEEE Inceldom has gone too far
and then they'll claim that it goes both ways but the thing is that it doesn't go both ways because most women KNOW that it's not all men, these men can't comprehend that it isn't all women
@@katherinegriffin yea they don’t realize it’s an exaggeration. If I say I hate men I don’t mean every fucking man on the planet and like 99.9% of women who say that don’t mean it either.
I am a 23 year old woman. NEVER have I ever heard any of my fem-friends say they’re after a man’s money. Ever. In fact, we talk about how much it fucking sucks that we are badgered about getting married, having babies, but also expected to be a boss bitch who works high up.
Having men tell us they got a good job so go out with us but also told to not be a gold digger. Told to make your own money but not too much or you’re too career oriented. But same. None of fem friends talked about money chasing a man. Actually most worked earlier and harder in life and would be buying their boyfriends more shit.
I swear most of the guys who seem to complain about women only wanting them for their money are the guys that want a woman who will stay at home. If you're expecting a woman to stay at home and not work then I think it's kinda fair that she's going to be concerned with how much money you are making.
It's not a lifestyle I would want, and I wouldn't feel comfortable staying at home and not working, but if a man wants to have a stay at home wife who takes care of his children, does chores etc., it's only logical he makes the money to provide for that lifestyle. If you want a wife with that "traditional" mindset, don't be surprised she expects you to fulfill your role as a "provider" for the family
That and they usually try to impress women by bragging about the money they make, the things they have, and the things they'd buy for their partner. If all the positive things you say about yourself are based on your material wealth, the women you are going to attract will be those with an interest in your money. It'd be like if a woman interacted with every potential partner by plying them with pastries and talking about baking 24/7, then went on to 'sagely' advise other women that every men has a sweet tooth and wants their partner to be their personal baker. If you only ever "advertise" yourself as one thing, don't be surprised if most of the partners you attract want you for that one thing.
What’s weird is how men will try to convince you to date them/leave your partner for them with all kinds of “I’ll spoil youuuu, look at my caaar, I gotta six figure incoooome,” and then when you aren’t interested despite whatever money they have, they’ll turn around and be the same guys calling women gold diggers. they just can’t handle that they might be the problem.
man: I’m rich I want to spoil you girl and give you everything woman: no thanks I have my own money I’m not interested in money or dating man: that bitch just wanted my money and thinks I’m not rich enough for her We can’t win
I keep saying this! They somehow want the best of both worlds; to eat their cake and have it. They want a docile, submissive, breedable (saying all these things makes me want to puke) woman to 'take care of' but when it actually comes to taking care of her, she's a gold digger. Make it make sense!
fr, i was talking to this dude and i was like "hey i don't know if i want to be in a relationship rn, sorry" and he started trying to prove he had money, sending me pics of the stuff he had, like bro??? that's not the problem i just don't wanna be with you
I had this aquaintance, he dated this gorgeous girl but she was much younger than him. She tried to make it work for almost a year, but he was honestly a dick to her. The more she tried to make it work the more possessive, jealous and controlling he became, while not even trying to change anything about the stuff that bothered her (like discussing their sex life in grousome detail in front of a whole group of people). When she finally broke up with him, he decided she was a gold digger and that she left him because "even though he gave her everything he had" (Which he did for the most part hed spend all his money on her) it wasnt enough for her and she needed someone who could buy her more because women are just gold diggers like that and will leave you as soon as someone with more cash comes along. I swear men who think women are just after money are the same men that dont want/cant offer anything else and then try to flip it around on the women.
But when you tell them that, they perform mental gymnastics to prove that society is "gynocentric", despite the horrid treatment that women still receive around the world.
It's literally their rules. We wouldn't have these problems if they would just not have shitty rules. Just because they impose them on themselves doesn't mean women get off Scot free.
Bro the thing about men “taking up the helm” is that there was a study done during Covid talking about invisible labor and it turns out that female oriented jobs were in person quicker so mothers ended up having to work in person while fathers were working from home. And rather than the father assisting in housework while at home the study found that oldest daughters ended up taking care of the children and cleaning the house while mothers were away because men don’t have a pressure to run a household.
@Sine Nomine Don't look at my pfp, it'll be confusing to the comment. I can cook and bake, I don't only follow recipes but also have enough technical knowledge to create something without instructions. But when I'm alone I also eat ramen noodles and raw broccoli.
this exact thing happened to my family! my siblings have moved out but i’ve done all the work he’s supposed to and my mom comes home from working all day and is forced to cook because my dad refuses to! drives me insane
im a trans man whose hair grows fast and im so glad that i look good with a shaved head, so i just shave it every 6 or 8 months because i dont want to get a haircut every 2 or 3 months. dysphoria gone!
I once tried to argue with this Reddit bunch that it's not only money or beauty-standard looks women are after. I married a dungeon master who likes to watch birds and most of my husbands very nerdy friend circle are in happy relationships. The trick is that they aren't assholes.
They literally think those guys are figments of our imagination lmao I promise, they won't believe it. As someone whose best friend is an attractive man who likes magic the gathering and just so happens to treat women like Humans. His friends are nerdy too and I've noticed the nerdier, the more self confident, the more stable the relationships tbh
@@mightymeatymech the added bonus is that my husband knows so many crafts like woodwork, painting, sewing, knitting, stage make up etc from his LARP days, it's actually so cool. But I guess that makes toxic masculinity heads just explode lol
@Sine Nomine I don't know how you've extrapolated from my post that Nerds can't be assholes. They can, of course. But in the incel logic they shouldn't have relationships or affairs at all because women only want money or looks.
Trying to explain to redditors why I believe a woman regarding abuse even though it wasn't even one of those "believe women" type of things and it really was just obvious the guy was lying may well have been the most frustrating thing I've ever done online
Admin will ignore comments about harming women bit if you put a comment about stats or something that makes men look bad, your comment will be removed.
@@rayraymind you know that, and I know that, but redditors don't. So I tried to meet them where they were, explaining why even from that perspective there was no logical way to justify not believing it, but somehow that still wasn't enough. Far as I can tell it isn't about whether people should believe victims or not, but about whether we should even listen to them, and these people seem to want not to even listen.
Thank youuu I saw this and it was a peak redditor moment. As the adage goes, “men are afraid women will laugh at them, women are afraid men will murder them”
There are guys who are, without a sense of irony or self-awareness, saying that Drew Afualo is on the same level of shittiness as Andrew Tate. So, you're right.
@@mudsludge Well, they kinda are, just not victims of women, rather victims of patriarchy. I mean, I figure that’s well known, we’ll all kinda getting shafted because we live in a patriarchal society. Being dismissive about that when it affects dudes, even shitty dudes like the ones we’re seeing here, is itself perpetuating that toxicity.
Then they’ll be triggered women are afraid of that because “ThEy aReNt LiKe ThAt” like quiet you’re so unsympathetic, you are feeling bad because your ego is hurt not feeling bad for women for having such terrible experiences with men that they feel the need to be so cautious. There are so many bad men in the world they’re so scary and most of those guys seem like normal nice guys at first. They know how to seem good and turn out to be monsters. We need to Protect ourselves and our life over a man’s feefee’s
This is just depressing, because a lot of these "disadvantages" stem from insecurities and the people they choose to surround themselves with. If you feel like nobody treats you right, do look for new friends and even a make-shift family if your own is toxic. There are so many kind people in this world, don't let one bad apple spoil the bunch.
It's super depressing... I often forget how many men are literally emotionally and physically starving for human connection outside of just sex. There's also the added component of internalized issues though, for example I had an ex who I would cuddle and buy flowers for and he once blew up and said I was trying to emasculate him.. I just wanted him to feel special. It sucks Edit- sure plenty of people of any gender are touch starved but jesus it's just so sad when you really get to the root of why so many men are lonely. Bullshit patriarchy tells them they're not allowed to be vulnerable, ever, and then they're just Sad in private. That sucks.
it always trips me up when men are like "for men, its harder to get women, yu see, women get all these men-" Yes!! A man is involved! Its jus not you! dont make that everyone else's problem lmfao, its just a huge self report fr
Most women go for the same small pool of "top" guys. They are not as liberal as men are, and are more difficult to please. Men statistically can be happy with an average woman. Women will feel they are missing something almost always, because getting male attention is too easy for them.
The interesting part is I think that there are a lot of valid points that they bring up, but rather than pointing to the source of these problems (the patriarchy) they instead focus their anger at women. Take, for example, men only being valued for what they can do. That is a pressure that is absolutely put onto men (being the breadwinner, fixing things, hell you could even stretch it to opening the car door or carrying their partner’s purse), and there being a lack of emphasis on them just existing in the relationship. Men are given a societal pressure to be the provider and do everything for their partner, or needing to Earn their partner’s love rather than receive it no strings attached. This pressure is from a standard created by the patriarchy, and is an important conversation that should be had when discussing mens issues, but the source is the society we All exist under, not specifically women. Of course some women (and men) still uphold those expectations, but the expectations were created By the patriarchy. I’m feminine presenting and born a woman, so I don’t know the extent of how that runs, but I think it’s important that these issues are brought to the table when discussing feminism, because everyone is hurt under the patriarchy. Idk, this comment got long, but it’s still important to mention I think.
@@mightymeatymech literally, i like the current tragectory of feminism esp intersectional cuz now its more touched on patriarchy hurts all people cuz intersectional, and yep i agree w op too that this is cuz of patriarchy and the answer to it is feminism which focuses on different issues under patriarchy cuz its always been abt destroying it. Its very sad that people think its women instead of hating patriarchy cuz who do u think reenforces this thinking on people?
well put, I want to add that they never present any solutions or suggestions to solve the problem . their final main point is always 'we have it hard too , now shut up women'
Maybe part of the reason women “want men for their money” is because historically we weren’t allowed to earn our own. Hell we weren’t allowed to have credit cards without our husbands permission until 1974. The only way we could survive was to rely on men for money. First we relied on our fathers and then on our partners. So like god forbid generational trauma affect our perception of intimacy and security.
i am a woman and i just wanna say i refuse to have generational trauma and i do not and will not intrinsically rely on others for my wellbeing this is a personal statement and a declaration of my will that i will make reality or die anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk, odan :)
I wouldn't even say that women are after money. Women want a man with a good job and savings because a man that has those two things has matured enough to understand the future isn't going to be rainbows and sunshine all the time. A man who has enough to cover all their obligations, but always ends up running out is someone who never matured past their teenage years.
I mean... I guess that is a reason but if you have the oppertunity as a women to earn money than I dont think that justifyes going after men for their money. I am saying this as a women. It isnt fair no matter how you look at it. Just dishonest. Its a weak excuse to hurt someone's feelings and use them. Honestly that kind of thing doesnt have many valid excuses...
"we cant have a conversation with a woman without the danger of being accused of abuse" My guy, we cant have a disagreement with a man without the danger of being assauIted or kiIIed As for the expectations thing... these guys couldn't survive a day with the expectations put on womenn 😂 Also the audacity of that man for saying that women having wombs is somehow an advantage towards women?? Like we are literally forced against our will to be breeding stock, and he looks at that and thinks "damn women have it too good" 😭 He's also objectively wrong about women getting more sympathy, there have been tons of studies documenting how doctors and everyday people react with less sympathy towards women's pains because they have this notion that women are always "over exaggerating" pain. A man can have an upset stomach and people will understand why he doesnt show up for work, but if a woman's insides feel like they are literally melting from period pains she is still expected to deal with it and show up to work
it's so funny because, to me, any genuine issues men feel they dealing with is USUALLY 2X as bad when it comes to women. husbands and plenty of men hit women for things as little as disagreeing with them, meanwhile little pussyboy men on reddit are crying because they're scared to be called an abuser 😭😭😭
literally. men make fun of us for being on our period and in excruciating pain. women are also more likely to die by a heart attack, because it’s less likely that the doctors will believe women’s pain/symptoms. women died in the er (heart attack) because no one believed them. there are also so many stories of women suffering from endometriosis and not getting treatment for decades, because no doctor would take their pain seriously. My mom would literally pass out when she was on her period, yet she only got diagnosed at 50 although she suffered all her life. decades of agony just because no one believed her.
"My pain as a man isn't taken seriously!" Wait until you develop a chronic illness and repeatedly dismissed because wOmEn HaVe FeElInGs while watching a man with a cold drive home with 300 oxy.
Yes! Omg. I work in a hospital and it's worse because I have to give the man the medicine and deny the woman. It kills me. Especially because I AM a woman with chronic Illnesses
@@dormant5023 I assume they work as someone who gives out prescribed medication kind of thing and that the man was prescribed the medication whilst the woman was not prescribed due to a doctor not taking them seriously
I feel really bad with these people, they probably have 0 experience with relationships at all, and their entire view of what relationships are like, societal expectations of men, gender roles, are based on what other redditors complain about or whatever some alpha male grifter sells them. If only they had some critical thinking skills or any concept of self worth
They probably have been unlucky in their relationships or haven't been able to find one and when they see these guys online saying that the problem is not them but modern women and feminism and "modernity" they find a place of comfort and validation to not change themselves and then they fall deeper and deeper down that rabbit hole and get worse and worse.
I dont get it, were you miserable your entire childhood that you were single? Its dumb. Its just a lack of more potential fun. Like im not at six flags right now but you dont see me bitching about how painful it is
@@joeltheowl3299 The worst part is it can only get worse. Most men are raised to not show emotions or ask for help. So it becomes a loop where they only get worse.
Let's talk about how redditor at 7:30 basically placed women's intrinsic value on having a womb and their fertility, then goes on to whine about not being valued for his humanity, but his economic value (AKA Cha Ching) when that's also not what women are valued for, either. Double standards??
@@random_phobias_1119 That post was filled with absolute hypocrisy and double standards. Men have many disadvantages in life--that's a no brainer-but the fact that some won't admit it's due to the same patriarchal system that also benefits them is mind boggling.
i sometimes worry about nick, he always talks about how stressful the channel is for him, and how much pressure he is under, but plays it off as just a joke. I really do hope he's doing ok and that he finds fulfillment in his life, wherever that ends up coming from.
although this is true, i am currently the happiest i’ve ever been as of last week!! so despite the stress, it seems to be paying off. i have a lot of bad days obviously, but it’s looking in a good direction. thank you for caring ❤
@@greenisnotnick glad to hear it Monsieur Nick. Gotta take burnout seriously and absolutely no one would blame you if you did need to take some time to recharge
@@samjones4097 the hell are you talking about lmao everyone feels tired/overworked from time to time in life and it’s nice to talk about it. no one is “crying” about anything 💀
I think it's more that they've been told that's all women want, and since they don't have that, they shouldn't even try to improve. They defeat themselves before they even start.
these men act like most of us aren't attracted to men and don't want husbands with a family and a stable love life with an eternal companion but instead only want to be with a man because it, benefits us?? we are mad because we want love and a connection and then are deemed as users and crazy and psycho in a relationship for wanting simple things..
These are the types of guys who complain about how shallow women are and how they won’t date them because of their looks/interests and then in the same breath will shame and harass a fat woman for existing.
Got in an argument in the comments of a Ben Shapiro video (I know, bad idea) where dudes were complaining that they can't say anything without being accused of misogyny. I was like... ummm maybe don't say misogynistic things? I was called a "gaslighter" lol
I love it when the misogynists say something that they heard from us on the left.. we arm them with the crap and they turn around and use it on us.. most of the time in a context that doesn’t make any sense.
Next time ask them what they said honestly so u can be like bestie cuz u r a misogynist and not self aware or over dramatic, cuz they dont seem that bright overall
Hate to say it but I've thought a couple of those things before. Especially the one about men not having inherent value unless they bring labor, protection, or money. It seemed like no one gave a shit about me when I was down but when I got back up then people wanted to be around me. I realized it wasn't that I didn't have value; it was my horrible outlook and attitude that made people feel horrible. You don't really notice you lack Self-esteem until you get even a tiny bit better or someone really pushes you to see it. It's a vicious cycle. Thankfully I pulled through but I know there are people out there who haven't. Just know you're not alone and you can pull through. Try your hardest and believe in yourself. You are worth it.
It's a lonely place at your low. Some people receive underserved help and wasted genuine efforts while others struggles alone to get better. Life is unfair. In the end all this politics "patriarchy", incels and "gender" issue, feminism, radicalism etc. Are just coping mechanism, it's all discutions and fantasy to distract people about their own personal issue and insecurity. I do think we are in a post rational society in the West.
@@guessmyname1246 I hope you're doing well yourself! The holidays are just around the corner and if I didn't get a notification for someone liking this comment I would have never showed so happy holidays. Sorry I'm 2 months late but I appreciate you and the time you took to even leave this comment very much Mr/Ms. Internet Rando. Hope you're in good health both physically and mentally.
@@ggbonnie030 Thank you! Sorry I'm 2 months late but happy holidays and I hope you're doing well yourself. Please stay healthy, happy, and talk to your friends!
I always found it odd when some guys would complain that all women only dated men much wealthier than themselves (with the implication that women only want to date super-rich guys). There are numerous studies that show that men tend to be more attracted to women with lower IQs and that women have a lower rate of long-term relationships/ marriage the higher their IQ is. On average, the lower your IQ is, the worse you will do academically, and the lower-paying job you will end up in. Thus, men tend to date women who earn less than them. The idea that women actively go after rich guys isn't impossible but it's not the norm, most of the time, relationships just tend to result in that because of societal dating norms, and the fact that there is this idea that as a man, dating a woman who is smarter/ richer is emasculating.
@@chris135x literally no??? You can point out traits of toxic masculinity without directly blaming men? It’s a cultural issue not a one gender issue. Also I don’t really know what you mean by ‘dismissing things’ (super vague). I did point out that there are women who go after rich men as a rule but it is not the norm
They create a system where we systematically earn less than them for the same work, obviously we are going to earn less than them. So naturally in most relationships the man will earn more. They then like to think women naturally go for rich men when they’ve created a completely unnatural environment for us to contend with.
@@chris135x She just provided data and evidence to support her claim, you have nothing but your feelings. Its an objective fact that men on average prefer women who are lower lQ and also much younger. When you consider this fact, plus the fact that women on average make less money than men for various reasons, it becomes clear that the disparity in income on relationships is not due to women choosing rich men, but rather because men choose poor women and because the average man is richer than the average woman. Its basic statistics. There are more rich men than rich women so odds are there will be more relationships where the man is rich and the woman is poor than the other way around.
Hi Nick last night I was peeping in your window and I saw you hunched over, biting your toenails. You then spit out the toenail in your mouth into your hand, examined it, and put it back in your mouth and started chewing on it. You need an intervention buddy
As a trans man, the most inconvenient change for me was wearing a suit. I like them better, but it’s such a hassle to get them on and off compared to dresses. And much harder to go to the bathroom. Beats being hit on by middle aged men (as a young teen) though
as a trans masc, i had the opposite feeling, dresses were harder for me. Not saying ur experience is wrong or anything, cool that trans men arent a monolith
I was just thinking how great it would be if men snd women all wore dresses or robes as formal attire. At least that's what it was like in ancient China. Suits look so uncomfortable
@@lilypond5158 we shld honestly smash patriarchy so people wld be free from oppression and people can do whatever, feminism needs to go further for everyone to have equal access to flowy sundresses!
@@spencersk83r Harder to get on? That’s what I’m talking about if that wasn’t clear. From a dysphoria perspective, dresses suck for me, but they were much faster to put on than tucking in my shirt, tying a tie, talking a belt on and off, etc.
@@alexreid1173 I guess i did feel faster wearing tuxes and suits, because I would look up on youtube mens formal attire and would watch so many videos that i never felt slow dressing up like that. I can tie a windsor knot fast and a non clip bowtie fast. never considered it tho! ig i should help out my handsome bros more often so they can get fast with the ties :)
I just shaved my head last week. I'm a bi woman, I have a face full of piercings so I'm sure that adds to the overall look. Best decision I ever made, so low maintenance and it's a lot cheaper to bleach/color
I shaved my head in October after having fairly long hair my whole life, and nothing will ever compare to that first shower afterwards. I’m growing it out but I miss how easy it was 🥲
@@abbyz13 how is that the same thing at all…also i wasn’t tryna be rude or anything i just thought it was funny how unnecessary it was to say all those words 💀
Yeah, when you say garbage like "yOuRe WhY I hAvE FaItH In meN", your opinion is immediately invalid. I'm not surprised this video brought the feminists and misandrists out of the woodworks, they generally hate it when men try to bring up their problems. And when they see videos like this, they post their literal misandry and "all men will do blah blah blah" which they would never tolerate if it was about women.
My aunt was pregnant and went to the hospital for chest pain. The male ER doctor kept trying to send her home, saying that her chest pain was just from pregnancy. After arguing for a while, she called my uncle to talk to the doctor, and he finally agreed to running some scans. She had a lung clot and would’ve died because the doctor didn’t take her pain as a women seriously
There was a dude on reddit who posted the "question" "Reddit is all sex workers and spam now, whatever happened to people who liked to misbehave because it was fun?" And was being rightfully lit up in the comments. It was amazing.
@@chris135x typical "its hard being a man in todays society" and "women assume all men are sexist perverts" type shit. i thought the video was very on par.
@@morganevans5802 Well........Is that REALLY wrong? I personally believe live in general these days is still hard even though we have things to make life easier. But if we're to go by mens issues and womens rights....Men DO have problems they gotta go through, sometimes on their own. And women DO have rights. At least, in western parts of the world and maybe Asian parts.
I have a friend like that but it takes a fuck ton of tact and work to get through to him, more work than you should have to give your coworker. I’m making progress but also like therapy levels of deep with this dude. I have told him to talk to an actual one but i also know how fucking insensitive that can be considering i once had to wait two years. But allot of it seems to come from how his parents treated him. Make sure to teach your kids to love themselves even if you think you are creating lil narcissist, dont worry some fucker out there will try to knock them down anyway so its just getting ahead of it.
Mens diss advantage is simmered down to "some people want me to be this typa way" while womens societal diss advantage is dying in a hospital because our needs aren't met
Disadvantages of being a woman; not being able to walk anywhere without the fear of being raped and/or murdered, having a man make me uncomfortable literally every time I leave my house (i am constantly hit on), being blamed any time a man attacks you, not being able to speak up if youre sexually harassed by a boss at work unless they are stupid enough to do it in front of other people or by text because the company will always side with the person who makes them more money and they may retaliate and fire you (happened to me), not being taken as seriously as men, people do not think you are worthy of respect unless youre hot, you are physically weaker and therefore not capable of working high paying labor jobs, youre expected to be the only one in the home who cooks, cleans, and takes care of kids, despite the fact youre both working full time. Disadvantages of being a man according to men; women sometimes think we're creepy when we do creepy stuff, not everyone woman I like wants to sleep with me, never get free drinks at a bar...lol
Men cannot even LOOK at a woman in public WITHOUT being seen or viewed as a "creepy rapist". Men are avoiding women because of this. When women think every man is out to get her, men will eventually keep to themselves and not try to have a conversation with you.
the “needs to have money and expensive things” is always laughable to me because from my experience in life, talking from a boys pov who didn’t do well in school and isn’t doing well with jobs and financial gain, but i still got to be with the people i wantedb to be with and did arguably alot better in relationships n things like that, then my other friends that were male because 1. i surrounded myself with friends that were girls and women at a young age so i understood them alot better 2. i cared about them, no matter if they was just friends or girlfriends i was honest and listened to them, i made them laugh and smile so even when i didn’t have money or something like that to offer like gifts and accessories, they still liked or dare i say loved me and wanted to be with me because they knew me these guys really jus need to get out of their lad alpha male bubbles that tell them “jus beat up the girl to show your dominant and she’ll wanna have sex with you”, stop being so scared of the friendzone that it makes them physically angry when confronted with it (yet another thing men made up to bring down other men) and just be natural, if you’re akward, admit it, if you’re shy admit it, most women won’t think any less of you, a majority of women prolly feel the same way, i have bad social anxiety, a stutter and a speech impediment, but once you know someone and you settle down n become friends non of that matters
Reading that thread without sorting by controversial is incredibly depressing. So many single fathers being accused of pedophilia when they're out with their children or fighting for custody of their children from an abusive mother. Shit sucks, I shoulda never gone on reddit.
How come Ciara, Beyoncé, Taylor Swift, Eartha Kitt.....sing about wishing being a man yet I have NEVER heard a man singing about wishing he was a woman. Prove me wrong 🤔
i have the same issue with my hair growing too fast so i just shave it every few months. then i rarely have to get a haircut and i dont really like how it looks when it's buzzed but it takes just a few days for it to grow in and look fine. i do think you'd look nice with a buzzcut if you tried though :]
The things those comments explain also happen to women. With the same frequency. It's hard to date, it's hard to attract other people no matter what your gender and what your preferred gender(s) is. Others may not judge you based on your character and your humanity, but based on how much you own, how much you earn, what you can give to them etc etc And the irony is so lost on the dude who wrote about women having more inherit worth because of their ability to produce another human being. This is the same consumerist view of other people, you gotta make something to be worthy AGAIN. This is a problem not of gender relations or sexism, this is a deep societal problem that everyone experiences
.... yeah the fact this is true just spells out the fact that 90% of the people making those comments have like, 0 experience with women... or probably social interaction in general, since theyre on reddit.
Ahhhh the last message gave me hope. I'm a tall, muscularly built man, who's actually pretty sensitive to comments and I've had *bad* relationships with superficial people, let it be romantic or platonic. I'm currently only friends with a few, but good people and relationships still do scare me. But its getting better :)
Being attractive really brings superficial people around, they can’t help but feel more comfortable around attractive people. It’s gross. Keep being you, and don’t let anyone change you.
If a dude does end up in a relationship where she just wants him for money... He is still the one with the power in the relationship??? I mean it sucks for your partner to not love you but 'my biggest fear is ending up in a relationship where I hold financial power over my partner' that's...
I think you underestimate men's ability to love. I would argue men love harder and more genuinely than most women, by virtue of the fact that from the female perspective, the vast majority of men are easily replaced within a few days.
"Less sympathy for pain" yeah except that women are often misdiagnosed or told they're exaggerating shit when they go to the doctor, especially for things more common in women than men
I grew up with a lot of the toxic ideas about masculinity. I was raised catholic, until i got super poor and switched to public school. As someone who is not a breadwinner, largely due to mental illness, that has definitely made me very reluctant to date. I'm not typical in any masculine sense really, but i still feel that pressure to be a provider. I think the toxic notions about gender roles are far more widespread than Nick seems to be aware of. But it is possible I'm projecting & generalizing from my own experience. It's sad that there are so many people who are so convinced of those toxic notions that they turn into toxic people and blame women for it. I was a budding edge lord when i was younger and I'm so glad & fortunate i grew out of it.
And i do appreciate Nick's acknowledgement that some of those toxic misconceptions are genuinely from experience and not just individuals being crazy or bad or whatever.
@@reed6514 Proud of you dude :) 💜 stepping out of that toxic reality that you were in is a brave step you have taken towards your healing. I wish you the best, you got this!
There's a shit ton of vintage black and white photographs of men in distinguished attire sitting in their friend's laps, holding hands and cuddling. I think about those photographs every time modern day men won't even hug or hold their male friend's hand when they're going through some shit. Men who have good friends that love them don't talk like this. No matter your gender, friends don't let friends become incels.
You're essentially saying friends pay for each others prostitutes, if being wingman doesn't work out organically... It irritates me to no end how the average person has no idea what the word "incel" actually means. It's not an insult, it's a state of affairs that has no bearing on a person's character.
I think the idea that a lot of times men are only appreciated when they work/make money/provide is true on a larger scale. The thing is, a lot of men seem to not know or understand that that is misogyny at work. And that the opposite is also true for women: they're only appreciated by society when they get married/have kids/are a 'good wife'
Yeah I feel there definitely is a societal pressure for men to act and be a certain way. Speaking for myself, I was often made fun of for being more emotional or not taking part in physical activities. I denied counselling for years because people said that was "for pussies". When I was applying for college, I was told not to go into psychology because it was no place for a man. And when I got into college, they were thanking me because of how rare it is to see men in the program. I still get comments made about me being a psych student well into my senior year, and there's always somebody there to call me slurs when I cry or take up a more domestic role. There's a societal pressure on men that results from "the patriarchy" as it's called where men are expected to be the breadwinner of the house and to be logical and emotionally distant. It is a disadvantage for men that you are more likely to commit suicide because mental health is so stigmatized for men that it's not a realistic option for them. It's just not a systemic issue, there's no government systems or laws that prevent it, but it's a sociological one. It's definitely not a case by case thing, just as much as it's not a case by case situation for women to have those gendered behaviors and expectations forced on them. It's a part of the same system. Now of course the issues that women face are in more need of correction. You should be allowed to walk outside and not be harassed or assaulted, you should have the same high paying job opportunities, you shouldn't be disregarded on issues because "you feel too much to be objective". However, this is a multifaceted issue. A part of fixing the it is destigmatizing these traditionally feminine things and acknowledge there are male issues too. Maybe if we did and made empathy, proper anger management, and general self care a less stigmatized thing for men, then maybe this road to equality might be smoother and less radicalized. TL:DR In the patriarchy, everyone loses. Men, you're not oppressed but it is valid to feel stereotyped and targeted for not being "masculine enough". The "women have intrinsic value and men don't" point is bullshit. Women aren't after your money, assholes are, stop being sexist. Advocate for women's rights, make mental health a human issue and not a girl's only thing, and let's fix this stupid world we all live in. Love ya Nick, just thought this should be said
"my value as a human being is tied more to my utility/economic value than my humanity" that's not being a man that's just existing in end stage capitalism bro women have this issue too I think the answer would be just doing away with gender roles and our ideas of what makes a man/woman, let people just exist as humans however fits them best...
wow- i watched a almost year old video of yours where u judged spotify wrapped (because its almost that time again lol) and just happened to come across this one, and i think you are spot on. To be honest i sometimes get into a bad headspace because i see all of these comments about "men arent valuable aside from their money" or "men have to provide something to be loved" or whatever. its not that ive personally experienced what those comments are describing, but i also havent experienced much at all because im not the most social person ever, and truthfully ill never be able to really see things from womens point of view... but... with that being said when you say that its just about who you surround yourself with, i completely agree. i think its not just men who surround themselves with the wrong people but also women. there are miserable women like this too, and i think the miserable women are fueling the miserable men in a way and the other way around. i always see some men being upset that some women for example say "men are trash" or what not, which is probably largely something caused by hookup culture, and i think that creates some lashing out from men that either have bad experiences with women, or no experiences at all. its almost always a echo chamber of people fueling the same fire. they just resound the same problem and confirm their biases by having others agreeing with them and their experiences/opinions. confirmation bias probably releases dopamine or something, because i know there are plenty of people that surround themselves with regular people that dont have those same issues as they do, but i almost never see them in the same social circles or discussions on the internet. so yea people surround themselves with the wrong people and stay stuck in the same negative loop that way.
“higher expectations” lmaooo the standards are on the floor with most women. one of my girl friends said “yeah he treats me bad but at least he bought me flowers after” like dude, dont even speak. 😂
@Sine Nomine nah girl you deserve better than that. there ARE good men out there. havent found them yet?? but thats what my mom says idk. probably gonna be single for a long time. i wish you luck on your search 🥰 keep those standards high
I feel (warning: nuance) this conversation is -more then people realize sometimes- swayed by how different the backgrounds of people in these online discussions are. There can be people from all around the world with vastly different cultural, religious, family wise backgrounds. 100% in an online debate if you say. "Women/men do x" it is going to be true somewhere. I believe even most people are genuine when saying this and may have had these experiences. But people reading it greatly underestimate how different their experience is going to be
I love how much more commentary and originality I’ve been seeing in your videos recently :) I remember your video about youtube making it difficult to manage your content to consumer ratio when it comes to changing your style at ALL. I’ve been loving your recent main and side channel videos and it seems like you enjoy it too :)
I have followed you for like a year and I’ve always liked your videos alot but I really like the direction where they are going and I can see that you do hard work to make your videos more entertaining and fun and I really appreciate it. Your videos always makes day sm better, keep it up:)
LOLZ no. You literally only speak for yourself. You are not the Lorax, kid. And Nick really should listen to other people before covering a topic. He needs a new perspective.
@@TylerDeVenny It doesn't work that way, kid. Like wow. You're immature and it shows. You leftist have the most difficult time being mature and rational.
"can't get into a disagreement with a woman without being accused of abuse" no. you can't be abusive without being accused of abused. there, fixed it for ya. abusers playing the victims now smh
8:35 to say that these circumstances arise because "men themselves set those standards" is a bit reductionist, people of all genders reinforce the patriarchy (sometimes without realizing it). It's not enough to change male behavior, we need to change everyone's behavior surrounding the active enforcement of binary gender roles.
Okay. Just dismiss that there ARE women out there who date men for their wealth or status. Just because you don't see it means it never happens, right? Like r*pe. I don't see it happening so it must never happen.
nobody asked but the music at 12:39 when nick is slow-mo punching the air is the erhu version of rhythms from the conch by HOYO-MiX and Yu-peng Chen :D
Really dig the "riffing" format. You seem to have a lot of good thoughts on relationships, men, and masculinity. Genuinely would listen to this as like a podcast on my commute. Good stuff!
Gotta get me some of that womb value that means my pain is more respected than men despite every social study on the matter within the medical field saying the opposite that womens pain is ignored and undervalued
You are such a fresh of breath air. Thank you for talking about these things. I appreciate how you always consider other groups’ perspectives. To have a conversation, we have to be fair, and that means acknowledging all sides. Things like this lead us to a more unified world 👍
Being born male, the only think I ever really struggled with that was directly correlated to me being a “man” is the expectation of those around me to be traditionally masculine. Growing up I felt that I had to hide part of myself from most people I talked to, even my dad, so that I wouldn’t be judged for being different. All in all, fuck gender stereotypes…
YO fucking same. Except I needed to be both “masculine” enough to fight my father but “feminine” enough to do all the chore and rear my siblings while also being a good docile little girl.
Shits fucking wild.
i hope youve been able to be more comfortable with yourself and who you are regardless of what people around think you SHOULD be - fuck gender stereotypes to hell
All in all, fuck gender. It's not necessary at this point in the development of humanity. It feels like every personality trait always has to be connected to a certain gender for no good reason. And there's no good reason why we can't we just go through life and not have to worry about arbitrary stuff like that.
As a girl I expirenced the compete opposite I was never feminine enough. I’m sorry you had to experience that btw.
@@xx_remi_xx5211 gendered expectations are bullshit on either side of the aisle. Funny part is I'm non binary and used to think people were bullying me by asking if I'm a girl or a boy. Now I'm like "hm I guess they were just unwittingly affirming my gender!"
Now my gender expectations are "why do you have boobies and wear cute femme clothes if you're non binary" lol
7:30 okay but as a woman I've literally been denied and accused of lying from DOCTORS because of my womb/uterus because "have you considered you're on your period" ...the 'period pain' the doctor tried to insist on was my apedix bursting
there’s also studies showing that women’s pain is often disregarded compared to men. this is literally bc of misogyny. women are considered to be over dramatic while men showing pain is considering more serious bc they are thought of as being “stronger” or whatever so when they show pain it’s like “oh wow that guy must really be in pain if it’s this visible/audible”
@@irisa7747 not to mention women have a much higher pain tolerance than men, because they are so used to feeling it! So when women complain about unusual pain, it should be, if anything, more concerning than men do. A lot of women receive delayed treatment because they either don’t realise that their pain is something serious, or aren’t taken seriously by doctors! They receive pain medication later on average after asking for it, and their concerns are often dismissed. Women tend to not realise when they’re having a heart attack because they mistake it for cramps. My mother is a perfect example, she had a pulmonary embolism, and only realised it was serious 12 hours later. If it wasn’t for our family friend who is a doctor, the hospital would have taken too long to check her heart and she would have died. I find these videos so stressful because these men are so delusional it’s insane!,
Ok im sorry but can we just talk abt how literally no one gives a flying *fuckkk* if you actually *are* on your period. Like bro, im still in pain 🌚
OMFG or the classic “are you sure you aren’t pregnant?” SHUT UP SHUT UP
i’m intersex and doctors. are literally the fuckinh worst.
the irony of this subreddit is they complain about being generalized, not all men etc, then they generalize all women
I know right. We aren’t a fucking hivemind, dude. You don’t know ALL WOMEN. If I said all men are violent and abusive they would lose their shit but they’re perfectly okay saying all women are golddigging whores REEEE
Inceldom has gone too far
and then they'll claim that it goes both ways but the thing is that it doesn't go both ways because most women KNOW that it's not all men, these men can't comprehend that it isn't all women
Read the full thread omg its not that bad.
At least these guys are the bottom of the barrel in that thread
@@katherinegriffin yea they don’t realize it’s an exaggeration. If I say I hate men I don’t mean every fucking man on the planet and like 99.9% of women who say that don’t mean it either.
I am a 23 year old woman. NEVER have I ever heard any of my fem-friends say they’re after a man’s money. Ever. In fact, we talk about how much it fucking sucks that we are badgered about getting married, having babies, but also expected to be a boss bitch who works high up.
I got proposed to when i was homeless so i know that’s right!
Having men tell us they got a good job so go out with us but also told to not be a gold digger.
Told to make your own money but not too much or you’re too career oriented.
But same. None of fem friends talked about money chasing a man. Actually most worked earlier and harder in life and would be buying their boyfriends more shit.
I'd love a health care daddy... I have some health issues I need to take care of... Hehehe
@@magnarcreed3801 this! I started working at 14 and my bf in high school at age 16 would constantly ask for money from me for lunch and shit
fem-friends lol
I swear most of the guys who seem to complain about women only wanting them for their money are the guys that want a woman who will stay at home. If you're expecting a woman to stay at home and not work then I think it's kinda fair that she's going to be concerned with how much money you are making.
Exactly!!
It's not a lifestyle I would want, and I wouldn't feel comfortable staying at home and not working, but if a man wants to have a stay at home wife who takes care of his children, does chores etc., it's only logical he makes the money to provide for that lifestyle. If you want a wife with that "traditional" mindset, don't be surprised she expects you to fulfill your role as a "provider" for the family
@@tusia3899 They want all the benefits but none of the disadvantages, like spoiled children.
That and they usually try to impress women by bragging about the money they make, the things they have, and the things they'd buy for their partner. If all the positive things you say about yourself are based on your material wealth, the women you are going to attract will be those with an interest in your money.
It'd be like if a woman interacted with every potential partner by plying them with pastries and talking about baking 24/7, then went on to 'sagely' advise other women that every men has a sweet tooth and wants their partner to be their personal baker.
If you only ever "advertise" yourself as one thing, don't be surprised if most of the partners you attract want you for that one thing.
If I had a girlfriend, I would want us to both work so we rely on each other and no one feels inferior
What’s weird is how men will try to convince you to date them/leave your partner for them with all kinds of “I’ll spoil youuuu, look at my caaar, I gotta six figure incoooome,” and then when you aren’t interested despite whatever money they have, they’ll turn around and be the same guys calling women gold diggers. they just can’t handle that they might be the problem.
man: I’m rich I want to spoil you girl and give you everything
woman: no thanks I have my own money I’m not interested in money or dating
man: that bitch just wanted my money and thinks I’m not rich enough for her
We can’t win
Fr
I keep saying this! They somehow want the best of both worlds; to eat their cake and have it. They want a docile, submissive, breedable (saying all these things makes me want to puke) woman to 'take care of' but when it actually comes to taking care of her, she's a gold digger. Make it make sense!
fr, i was talking to this dude and i was like "hey i don't know if i want to be in a relationship rn, sorry" and he started trying to prove he had money, sending me pics of the stuff he had, like bro??? that's not the problem i just don't wanna be with you
I had this aquaintance, he dated this gorgeous girl but she was much younger than him. She tried to make it work for almost a year, but he was honestly a dick to her. The more she tried to make it work the more possessive, jealous and controlling he became, while not even trying to change anything about the stuff that bothered her (like discussing their sex life in grousome detail in front of a whole group of people). When she finally broke up with him, he decided she was a gold digger and that she left him because "even though he gave her everything he had" (Which he did for the most part hed spend all his money on her) it wasnt enough for her and she needed someone who could buy her more because women are just gold diggers like that and will leave you as soon as someone with more cash comes along.
I swear men who think women are just after money are the same men that dont want/cant offer anything else and then try to flip it around on the women.
these men don’t understand that we are oppressed by the same patriarchy
But when you tell them that, they perform mental gymnastics to prove that society is "gynocentric", despite the horrid treatment that women still receive around the world.
A lot of their problems are things that they created lol.
It's literally their rules. We wouldn't have these problems if they would just not have shitty rules. Just because they impose them on themselves doesn't mean women get off Scot free.
Rules are for fools. Save your stupid rulin for fools that need some schoolin
This! I really do actually feel for men. We all have to realize the whole system is fucked
Bro the thing about men “taking up the helm” is that there was a study done during Covid talking about invisible labor and it turns out that female oriented jobs were in person quicker so mothers ended up having to work in person while fathers were working from home. And rather than the father assisting in housework while at home the study found that oldest daughters ended up taking care of the children and cleaning the house while mothers were away because men don’t have a pressure to run a household.
@Sine Nomine Don't look at my pfp, it'll be confusing to the comment.
I can cook and bake, I don't only follow recipes but also have enough technical knowledge to create something without instructions.
But when I'm alone I also eat ramen noodles and raw broccoli.
Hold up why tf is that so true tho. My sister was acting like more of a mum then my baby brothers 'dad' (my baby brother has a different dad to us)
Oh dang, hello. I am the oldest daughter
Do you know where to find this study? I want to read it... And send it to a few people
this exact thing happened to my family! my siblings have moved out but i’ve done all the work he’s supposed to and my mom comes home from working all day and is forced to cook because my dad refuses to! drives me insane
im a trans man whose hair grows fast and im so glad that i look good with a shaved head, so i just shave it every 6 or 8 months because i dont want to get a haircut every 2 or 3 months. dysphoria gone!
Congrats fella
do you feel like strangers treated you different before you transitioned
Nice!! :) love that for you dude
@@Max78912 what would you say if they said no?
I have a buzz cut too it's so convenient and it's also good for dying my hair all the time without worrying about damage
I once tried to argue with this Reddit bunch that it's not only money or beauty-standard looks women are after. I married a dungeon master who likes to watch birds and most of my husbands very nerdy friend circle are in happy relationships. The trick is that they aren't assholes.
They literally think those guys are figments of our imagination lmao I promise, they won't believe it. As someone whose best friend is an attractive man who likes magic the gathering and just so happens to treat women like Humans. His friends are nerdy too and I've noticed the nerdier, the more self confident, the more stable the relationships tbh
@@mightymeatymech the added bonus is that my husband knows so many crafts like woodwork, painting, sewing, knitting, stage make up etc from his LARP days, it's actually so cool. But I guess that makes toxic masculinity heads just explode lol
You guys sound so happy :D
@Sine Nomine I don't know how you've extrapolated from my post that Nerds can't be assholes. They can, of course. But in the incel logic they shouldn't have relationships or affairs at all because women only want money or looks.
That's a good trick, I tried it and you are right!
Trying to explain to redditors why I believe a woman regarding abuse even though it wasn't even one of those "believe women" type of things and it really was just obvious the guy was lying may well have been the most frustrating thing I've ever done online
They refuse logic and embrace victimhood. Funny part is that they think we're doing that.
The first mistake you made was trying to be logical in a conversation with redditors
you should just always believe the victims, i dont know why we should have to explain that
Admin will ignore comments about harming women bit if you put a comment about stats or something that makes men look bad, your comment will be removed.
@@rayraymind you know that, and I know that, but redditors don't.
So I tried to meet them where they were, explaining why even from that perspective there was no logical way to justify not believing it, but somehow that still wasn't enough. Far as I can tell it isn't about whether people should believe victims or not, but about whether we should even listen to them, and these people seem to want not to even listen.
Thank youuu I saw this and it was a peak redditor moment. As the adage goes, “men are afraid women will laugh at them, women are afraid men will murder them”
There are guys who are, without a sense of irony or self-awareness, saying that Drew Afualo is on the same level of shittiness as Andrew Tate. So, you're right.
@@Astepole lmao that's a crazy reach. they are so desperate to be victims
@@mudsludge Well, they kinda are, just not victims of women, rather victims of patriarchy. I mean, I figure that’s well known, we’ll all kinda getting shafted because we live in a patriarchal society. Being dismissive about that when it affects dudes, even shitty dudes like the ones we’re seeing here, is itself perpetuating that toxicity.
Then they’ll be triggered women are afraid of that because “ThEy aReNt LiKe ThAt” like quiet you’re so unsympathetic, you are feeling bad because your ego is hurt not feeling bad for women for having such terrible experiences with men that they feel the need to be so cautious. There are so many bad men in the world they’re so scary and most of those guys seem like normal nice guys at first. They know how to seem good and turn out to be monsters. We need to Protect ourselves and our life over a man’s feefee’s
And then the redditors will go "acTuAlLy mEn aRE mOrE lIkeLy tO bE mUrDeReD-" *pulls out random statistics from their ass*
This is just depressing, because a lot of these "disadvantages" stem from insecurities and the people they choose to surround themselves with. If you feel like nobody treats you right, do look for new friends and even a make-shift family if your own is toxic. There are so many kind people in this world, don't let one bad apple spoil the bunch.
It's super depressing... I often forget how many men are literally emotionally and physically starving for human connection outside of just sex.
There's also the added component of internalized issues though, for example I had an ex who I would cuddle and buy flowers for and he once blew up and said I was trying to emasculate him.. I just wanted him to feel special. It sucks
Edit- sure plenty of people of any gender are touch starved but jesus it's just so sad when you really get to the root of why so many men are lonely. Bullshit patriarchy tells them they're not allowed to be vulnerable, ever, and then they're just Sad in private. That sucks.
Men are force to go to war and pay child support so yeah
it always trips me up when men are like "for men, its harder to get women, yu see, women get all these men-" Yes!! A man is involved! Its jus not you! dont make that everyone else's problem lmfao, its just a huge self report fr
wOmEn GeT aLl ThEsE mEn anyways because most men will sleep with any woman or even anyTHING that comes their way.
Most women go for the same small pool of "top" guys. They are not as liberal as men are, and are more difficult to please. Men statistically can be happy with an average woman. Women will feel they are missing something almost always, because getting male attention is too easy for them.
The interesting part is I think that there are a lot of valid points that they bring up, but rather than pointing to the source of these problems (the patriarchy) they instead focus their anger at women.
Take, for example, men only being valued for what they can do. That is a pressure that is absolutely put onto men (being the breadwinner, fixing things, hell you could even stretch it to opening the car door or carrying their partner’s purse), and there being a lack of emphasis on them just existing in the relationship. Men are given a societal pressure to be the provider and do everything for their partner, or needing to Earn their partner’s love rather than receive it no strings attached. This pressure is from a standard created by the patriarchy, and is an important conversation that should be had when discussing mens issues, but the source is the society we All exist under, not specifically women. Of course some women (and men) still uphold those expectations, but the expectations were created By the patriarchy.
I’m feminine presenting and born a woman, so I don’t know the extent of how that runs, but I think it’s important that these issues are brought to the table when discussing feminism, because everyone is hurt under the patriarchy. Idk, this comment got long, but it’s still important to mention I think.
Long comment was worthy of posting tbh, you're spot on. We gotta destroy the patriarchy from the inside out, one backpack cuddle at a time
@@mightymeatymech literally, i like the current tragectory of feminism esp intersectional cuz now its more touched on patriarchy hurts all people cuz intersectional, and yep i agree w op too that this is cuz of patriarchy and the answer to it is feminism which focuses on different issues under patriarchy cuz its always been abt destroying it. Its very sad that people think its women instead of hating patriarchy cuz who do u think reenforces this thinking on people?
Yep
Yeah they could actually make some good points. There ARE disadvantages to being a man. Just like there are disadvantages for literally everything.
well put, I want to add that they never present any solutions or suggestions to solve the problem . their final main point is always 'we have it hard too , now shut up women'
Maybe part of the reason women “want men for their money” is because historically we weren’t allowed to earn our own. Hell we weren’t allowed to have credit cards without our husbands permission until 1974. The only way we could survive was to rely on men for money. First we relied on our fathers and then on our partners. So like god forbid generational trauma affect our perception of intimacy and security.
i am a woman and i just wanna say i refuse to have generational trauma and i do not and will not intrinsically rely on others for my wellbeing
this is a personal statement and a declaration of my will that i will make reality or die
anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk, odan :)
I wouldn't even say that women are after money. Women want a man with a good job and savings because a man that has those two things has matured enough to understand the future isn't going to be rainbows and sunshine all the time.
A man who has enough to cover all their obligations, but always ends up running out is someone who never matured past their teenage years.
That’s just an excuse…
I mean... I guess that is a reason but if you have the oppertunity as a women to earn money than I dont think that justifyes going after men for their money. I am saying this as a women. It isnt fair no matter how you look at it. Just dishonest. Its a weak excuse to hurt someone's feelings and use them. Honestly that kind of thing doesnt have many valid excuses...
@Ur a peenees exactly! i’m sick of all this bullcrap being shoved down my throat
"we cant have a conversation with a woman without the danger of being accused of abuse"
My guy, we cant have a disagreement with a man without the danger of being assauIted or kiIIed
As for the expectations thing... these guys couldn't survive a day with the expectations put on womenn 😂
Also the audacity of that man for saying that women having wombs is somehow an advantage towards women?? Like we are literally forced against our will to be breeding stock, and he looks at that and thinks "damn women have it too good" 😭 He's also objectively wrong about women getting more sympathy, there have been tons of studies documenting how doctors and everyday people react with less sympathy towards women's pains because they have this notion that women are always "over exaggerating" pain. A man can have an upset stomach and people will understand why he doesnt show up for work, but if a woman's insides feel like they are literally melting from period pains she is still expected to deal with it and show up to work
it's so funny because, to me, any genuine issues men feel they dealing with is USUALLY 2X as bad when it comes to women. husbands and plenty of men hit women for things as little as disagreeing with them, meanwhile little pussyboy men on reddit are crying because they're scared to be called an abuser 😭😭😭
literally. men make fun of us for being on our period and in excruciating pain. women are also more likely to die by a heart attack, because it’s less likely that the doctors will believe women’s pain/symptoms. women died in the er (heart attack) because no one believed them. there are also so many stories of women suffering from endometriosis and not getting treatment for decades, because no doctor would take their pain seriously. My mom would literally pass out when she was on her period, yet she only got diagnosed at 50 although she suffered all her life. decades of agony just because no one believed her.
it’s like the saying “men are afraid of women laughing at them. women are afraid of men killing them”
people of any gender can have periods and wombs :/
Every. Single. Point.
"My pain as a man isn't taken seriously!" Wait until you develop a chronic illness and repeatedly dismissed because wOmEn HaVe FeElInGs while watching a man with a cold drive home with 300 oxy.
Yes! Omg. I work in a hospital and it's worse because I have to give the man the medicine and deny the woman. It kills me. Especially because I AM a woman with chronic Illnesses
@@DollfaceLizkah why do you have to deny the women?
@@DollfaceLizkah wait is that an actual rule??
@@dormant5023 I assume they work as someone who gives out prescribed medication kind of thing and that the man was prescribed the medication whilst the woman was not prescribed due to a doctor not taking them seriously
@@MayBee15 Yeah, most doctors right it off as 'wOmEn WoRrY tOo MuCh' and 'iT's JuSt HoRmOnEs'
I feel really bad with these people, they probably have 0 experience with relationships at all, and their entire view of what relationships are like, societal expectations of men, gender roles, are based on what other redditors complain about or whatever some alpha male grifter sells them. If only they had some critical thinking skills or any concept of self worth
They probably have been unlucky in their relationships or haven't been able to find one and when they see these guys online saying that the problem is not them but modern women and feminism and "modernity" they find a place of comfort and validation to not change themselves and then they fall deeper and deeper down that rabbit hole and get worse and worse.
I dont get it, were you miserable your entire childhood that you were single? Its dumb. Its just a lack of more potential fun. Like im not at six flags right now but you dont see me bitching about how painful it is
@@joeltheowl3299 The worst part is it can only get worse. Most men are raised to not show emotions or ask for help. So it becomes a loop where they only get worse.
This is the best comment on this video by far
Let's talk about how redditor at 7:30 basically placed women's intrinsic value on having a womb and their fertility, then goes on to whine about not being valued for his humanity, but his economic value (AKA Cha Ching) when that's also not what women are valued for, either. Double standards??
Wtf you are so right 😭😭😭 I didnt even think of it like that that's INSANE and it makes me so so mad
@@random_phobias_1119 That post was filled with absolute hypocrisy and double standards. Men have many disadvantages in life--that's a no brainer-but the fact that some won't admit it's due to the same patriarchal system that also benefits them is mind boggling.
THANKS I DIDNT KNOW HOW TO WORD IT
Right? And by that token, women who can't have biological children or don't want children have no value, obviously.
i sometimes worry about nick, he always talks about how stressful the channel is for him, and how much pressure he is under, but plays it off as just a joke. I really do hope he's doing ok and that he finds fulfillment in his life, wherever that ends up coming from.
although this is true, i am currently the happiest i’ve ever been as of last week!! so despite the stress, it seems to be paying off. i have a lot of bad days obviously, but it’s looking in a good direction. thank you for caring ❤
@@greenisnotnick glad to hear it Monsieur Nick. Gotta take burnout seriously and absolutely no one would blame you if you did need to take some time to recharge
@@greenisnotnick that's great to hear! glad you're doing well. love your videos :))
@@greenisnotnick yeah you really do play that “woe is me, I’m a sad leftist that constantly needs something to cry about” card A LOT
@@samjones4097 the hell are you talking about lmao everyone feels tired/overworked from time to time in life and it’s nice to talk about it. no one is “crying” about anything 💀
Anyone that brings up money in this thread is just self-reporting that they have nothing else to add to a relationship
.
period
I think it's more that they've been told that's all women want, and since they don't have that, they shouldn't even try to improve. They defeat themselves before they even start.
It’s so funny how the men who say women are after their money don’t have money 🥴
You would already be occupied with other shit if you had that much money. That or these people just suck at self soothing
these men act like most of us aren't attracted to men and don't want husbands with a family and a stable love life with an eternal companion but instead only want to be with a man because it, benefits us?? we are mad because we want love and a connection and then are deemed as users and crazy and psycho in a relationship for wanting simple things..
they're basically projecting. Lol
These are the types of guys who complain about how shallow women are and how they won’t date them because of their looks/interests and then in the same breath will shame and harass a fat woman for existing.
any reddit post that looks like it would summon incels i immediately avoid 💀
Usually the ones that talk about sex, dating or gender usually lures them in.
@@steamyvegetables1445 yeah they’re obsessed with that
Ironic coming from a femcel
Got in an argument in the comments of a Ben Shapiro video (I know, bad idea) where dudes were complaining that they can't say anything without being accused of misogyny. I was like... ummm maybe don't say misogynistic things? I was called a "gaslighter" lol
I love it when the misogynists say something that they heard from us on the left.. we arm them with the crap and they turn around and use it on us.. most of the time in a context that doesn’t make any sense.
Next time ask them what they said honestly so u can be like bestie cuz u r a misogynist and not self aware or over dramatic, cuz they dont seem that bright overall
The second I saw “Ben Shapiro” I felt your pain. I wish I was as brave as you.
@@Reed5016 not brave, stupid lol. As soon as I realized I had stirred the incel hornets nest I regretted it.
As much as I hate Ben Shapiro, you did gaslight.
Hate to say it but I've thought a couple of those things before. Especially the one about men not having inherent value unless they bring labor, protection, or money. It seemed like no one gave a shit about me when I was down but when I got back up then people wanted to be around me. I realized it wasn't that I didn't have value; it was my horrible outlook and attitude that made people feel horrible. You don't really notice you lack Self-esteem until you get even a tiny bit better or someone really pushes you to see it. It's a vicious cycle. Thankfully I pulled through but I know there are people out there who haven't. Just know you're not alone and you can pull through. Try your hardest and believe in yourself. You are worth it.
I know I'm a rando on the internet but I'm happy for you
I’m glad that you’ve managed to turn things around for yourself! ❤
It's a lonely place at your low.
Some people receive underserved help and wasted genuine efforts while others struggles alone to get better.
Life is unfair.
In the end all this politics "patriarchy", incels and "gender" issue, feminism, radicalism etc. Are just coping mechanism, it's all discutions and fantasy to distract people about their own personal issue and insecurity.
I do think we are in a post rational society in the West.
@@guessmyname1246 I hope you're doing well yourself! The holidays are just around the corner and if I didn't get a notification for someone liking this comment I would have never showed so happy holidays. Sorry I'm 2 months late but I appreciate you and the time you took to even leave this comment very much Mr/Ms. Internet Rando. Hope you're in good health both physically and mentally.
@@ggbonnie030 Thank you! Sorry I'm 2 months late but happy holidays and I hope you're doing well yourself. Please stay healthy, happy, and talk to your friends!
I always found it odd when some guys would complain that all women only dated men much wealthier than themselves (with the implication that women only want to date super-rich guys). There are numerous studies that show that men tend to be more attracted to women with lower IQs and that women have a lower rate of long-term relationships/ marriage the higher their IQ is. On average, the lower your IQ is, the worse you will do academically, and the lower-paying job you will end up in. Thus, men tend to date women who earn less than them. The idea that women actively go after rich guys isn't impossible but it's not the norm, most of the time, relationships just tend to result in that because of societal dating norms, and the fact that there is this idea that as a man, dating a woman who is smarter/ richer is emasculating.
Wow. Not only are you dismissing things just cause you don't see it happening, you ALSO shift the attention onto men for being bad or something? Wow.
@@chris135x literally no??? You can point out traits of toxic masculinity without directly blaming men? It’s a cultural issue not a one gender issue. Also I don’t really know what you mean by ‘dismissing things’ (super vague). I did point out that there are women who go after rich men as a rule but it is not the norm
They create a system where we systematically earn less than them for the same work, obviously we are going to earn less than them. So naturally in most relationships the man will earn more. They then like to think women naturally go for rich men when they’ve created a completely unnatural environment for us to contend with.
@@chris135x She just provided data and evidence to support her claim, you have nothing but your feelings. Its an objective fact that men on average prefer women who are lower lQ and also much younger. When you consider this fact, plus the fact that women on average make less money than men for various reasons, it becomes clear that the disparity in income on relationships is not due to women choosing rich men, but rather because men choose poor women and because the average man is richer than the average woman. Its basic statistics. There are more rich men than rich women so odds are there will be more relationships where the man is rich and the woman is poor than the other way around.
Huh. Now I know why my father is always insecure towards my mom. Thanks.
watching overexposed nick laugh as he fights the air has made my shit morning a wonderful one
Have a good day m8, only gonna get better from here
@@log7029 i appreciate u sm homie
Hi Nick last night I was peeping in your window and I saw you hunched over, biting your toenails. You then spit out the toenail in your mouth into your hand, examined it, and put it back in your mouth and started chewing on it. You need an intervention buddy
i really hope he sees this
I knew I wasn't imagining it when I saw him do the same thing in the bathroom at my cousins fourth birthday party
You were there too? huh... didn't see you
what
@@ajaxlewis7664 you BOTH were there?? I thought i was the only one
As a trans man, the most inconvenient change for me was wearing a suit. I like them better, but it’s such a hassle to get them on and off compared to dresses. And much harder to go to the bathroom. Beats being hit on by middle aged men (as a young teen) though
as a trans masc, i had the opposite feeling, dresses were harder for me. Not saying ur experience is wrong or anything, cool that trans men arent a monolith
I was just thinking how great it would be if men snd women all wore dresses or robes as formal attire.
At least that's what it was like in ancient China.
Suits look so uncomfortable
@@lilypond5158 we shld honestly smash patriarchy so people wld be free from oppression and people can do whatever, feminism needs to go further for everyone to have equal access to flowy sundresses!
@@spencersk83r Harder to get on? That’s what I’m talking about if that wasn’t clear. From a dysphoria perspective, dresses suck for me, but they were much faster to put on than tucking in my shirt, tying a tie, talking a belt on and off, etc.
@@alexreid1173 I guess i did feel faster wearing tuxes and suits, because I would look up on youtube mens formal attire and would watch so many videos that i never felt slow dressing up like that. I can tie a windsor knot fast and a non clip bowtie fast. never considered it tho! ig i should help out my handsome bros more often so they can get fast with the ties :)
I just shaved my head last week. I'm a bi woman, I have a face full of piercings so I'm sure that adds to the overall look. Best decision I ever made, so low maintenance and it's a lot cheaper to bleach/color
I shaved my head in October after having fairly long hair my whole life, and nothing will ever compare to that first shower afterwards. I’m growing it out but I miss how easy it was 🥲
I envy you
I love how men are like "my life is sooo hard 😭" but then you ask them why and they're just normal things like getting rejected
Getting rejected? Lolz no. You clearly don't listen to anyone who is "different".
@@chris135x shut up already
@@chris135x Maybe tell a therapist instead of hitting up this person's comments
I remember this guy had a whole breakdown n threatened to unalive himself bc his friend rejected him, we were like 12
@@chris135x replace "different" with "annoying", and you'd have yourself the correct sentence
bad thursday.
sorry your Thursday is bad. hope your Friday is better :)
@@nixpixl442 very kind gentle man/woman/person
@@weristmoritz you didn’t have to do all that you could’ve just said person 😭
@@svnnci you didn’t have to do all that you could’ve just used ‘username’
@@abbyz13 how is that the same thing at all…also i wasn’t tryna be rude or anything i just thought it was funny how unnecessary it was to say all those words 💀
Nick you're the only reason I have any faith in men 😭
Tbh same. My dream man… a guy who understands the world is frightening for us
@@cryptochrome3090 gotta lower your standards because that isn’t happening anytime soon😂
@@southernstargazer2006 *NEVER lower your standards, even if it doesn't happen anytime soon. FTFY.
Yeah, when you say garbage like "yOuRe WhY I hAvE FaItH In meN", your opinion is immediately invalid.
I'm not surprised this video brought the feminists and misandrists out of the woodworks, they generally hate it when men try to bring up their problems. And when they see videos like this, they post their literal misandry and "all men will do blah blah blah" which they would never tolerate if it was about women.
That’s sad
i would really love to hear your thoughts about relationships and intimacy and different kinds of attraction! i feel like that could be a fun vid :)
that’s good to know!! hopefully i can figure out a natural way to talk about it
@@greenisnotnick that would be super interesting!!
you can absolutely buzz your head, you wear hats anyway so just embrace it. hair grows an average of half an inch per month!
My aunt was pregnant and went to the hospital for chest pain. The male ER doctor kept trying to send her home, saying that her chest pain was just from pregnancy. After arguing for a while, she called my uncle to talk to the doctor, and he finally agreed to running some scans. She had a lung clot and would’ve died because the doctor didn’t take her pain as a women seriously
this was such a good video, the light heartedness & comedy paired with actual arguments made it so enjoyable and valuable to watch. thanks nick :)
THANKS!!!
There was a dude on reddit who posted the "question"
"Reddit is all sex workers and spam now, whatever happened to people who liked to misbehave because it was fun?"
And was being rightfully lit up in the comments. It was amazing.
As he shld, roast him
just sent this video to a sexist coworker i got into an argument with today. let’s change some lives boys
How is your coworker sexist? Like, what things did he do or say?
@@chris135x typical "its hard being a man in todays society" and "women assume all men are sexist perverts" type shit. i thought the video was very on par.
@@morganevans5802 Well........Is that REALLY wrong? I personally believe live in general these days is still hard even though we have things to make life easier. But if we're to go by mens issues and womens rights....Men DO have problems they gotta go through, sometimes on their own. And women DO have rights. At least, in western parts of the world and maybe Asian parts.
I have a friend like that but it takes a fuck ton of tact and work to get through to him, more work than you should have to give your coworker. I’m making progress but also like therapy levels of deep with this dude. I have told him to talk to an actual one but i also know how fucking insensitive that can be considering i once had to wait two years. But allot of it seems to come from how his parents treated him. Make sure to teach your kids to love themselves even if you think you are creating lil narcissist, dont worry some fucker out there will try to knock them down anyway so its just getting ahead of it.
@@chris135x did you even watch the video?
The fact that so many of these comments lump women in with children is so unbelievably telling
12:58 This one has the energy of an abused child. Like I get incel woman hating but hating kids? That's sad on a whole nother level
Mens diss advantage is simmered down to "some people want me to be this typa way" while womens societal diss advantage is dying in a hospital because our needs aren't met
What are you talking about? Maybe you should go back in time and get drafted into a war. See how you like being cannon fodder.
Disadvantages of being a woman; not being able to walk anywhere without the fear of being raped and/or murdered, having a man make me uncomfortable literally every time I leave my house (i am constantly hit on), being blamed any time a man attacks you, not being able to speak up if youre sexually harassed by a boss at work unless they are stupid enough to do it in front of other people or by text because the company will always side with the person who makes them more money and they may retaliate and fire you (happened to me), not being taken as seriously as men, people do not think you are worthy of respect unless youre hot, you are physically weaker and therefore not capable of working high paying labor jobs, youre expected to be the only one in the home who cooks, cleans, and takes care of kids, despite the fact youre both working full time. Disadvantages of being a man according to men; women sometimes think we're creepy when we do creepy stuff, not everyone woman I like wants to sleep with me, never get free drinks at a bar...lol
Men cannot even LOOK at a woman in public WITHOUT being seen or viewed as a "creepy rapist". Men are avoiding women because of this. When women think every man is out to get her, men will eventually keep to themselves and not try to have a conversation with you.
If youre going out anywhere, definitely go out with friends
Or some item that you could use to defend yourself like a banana
@@imgonnatellmom3245 I always keep a spare banana in my pants. Double protection ;)
OK men go outside with fear of being shot or stabbed, what's your point?
the “needs to have money and expensive things” is always laughable to me because from my experience in life, talking from a boys pov who didn’t do well in school and isn’t doing well with jobs and financial gain, but i still got to be with the people i wantedb to be with and did arguably alot better in relationships n things like that, then my other friends that were male
because 1. i surrounded myself with friends that were girls and women at a young age so i understood them alot better
2. i cared about them, no matter if they was just friends or girlfriends i was honest and listened to them, i made them laugh and smile
so even when i didn’t have money or something like that to offer like gifts and accessories, they still liked or dare i say loved me and wanted to be with me because they knew me
these guys really jus need to get out of their lad alpha male bubbles that tell them “jus beat up the girl to show your dominant and she’ll wanna have sex with you”, stop being so scared of the friendzone that it makes them physically angry when confronted with it (yet another thing men made up to bring down other men) and just be natural, if you’re akward, admit it, if you’re shy admit it, most women won’t think any less of you, a majority of women prolly feel the same way,
i have bad social anxiety, a stutter and a speech impediment, but once you know someone and you settle down n become friends non of that matters
Reading that thread without sorting by controversial is incredibly depressing. So many single fathers being accused of pedophilia when they're out with their children or fighting for custody of their children from an abusive mother. Shit sucks, I shoulda never gone on reddit.
I like how nick knows we pay more attention to Bambi then him
How come Ciara, Beyoncé, Taylor Swift, Eartha Kitt.....sing about wishing being a man yet I have NEVER heard a man singing about wishing he was a woman. Prove me wrong 🤔
i have the same issue with my hair growing too fast so i just shave it every few months. then i rarely have to get a haircut and i dont really like how it looks when it's buzzed but it takes just a few days for it to grow in and look fine. i do think you'd look nice with a buzzcut if you tried though :]
The things those comments explain also happen to women. With the same frequency. It's hard to date, it's hard to attract other people no matter what your gender and what your preferred gender(s) is. Others may not judge you based on your character and your humanity, but based on how much you own, how much you earn, what you can give to them etc etc
And the irony is so lost on the dude who wrote about women having more inherit worth because of their ability to produce another human being. This is the same consumerist view of other people, you gotta make something to be worthy AGAIN. This is a problem not of gender relations or sexism, this is a deep societal problem that everyone experiences
.... yeah the fact this is true just spells out the fact that 90% of the people making those comments have like, 0 experience with women... or probably social interaction in general, since theyre on reddit.
Ahhhh the last message gave me hope. I'm a tall, muscularly built man, who's actually pretty sensitive to comments and I've had *bad* relationships with superficial people, let it be romantic or platonic. I'm currently only friends with a few, but good people and relationships still do scare me. But its getting better :)
Being attractive really brings superficial people around, they can’t help but feel more comfortable around attractive people. It’s gross. Keep being you, and don’t let anyone change you.
my ex used to always say that same shit about me being after his money. he worked as a pizza delivery guy. lmao
If a dude does end up in a relationship where she just wants him for money... He is still the one with the power in the relationship??? I mean it sucks for your partner to not love you but 'my biggest fear is ending up in a relationship where I hold financial power over my partner' that's...
I think you underestimate men's ability to love. I would argue men love harder and more genuinely than most women, by virtue of the fact that from the female perspective, the vast majority of men are easily replaced within a few days.
"Less sympathy for pain" yeah except that women are often misdiagnosed or told they're exaggerating shit when they go to the doctor, especially for things more common in women than men
I grew up with a lot of the toxic ideas about masculinity. I was raised catholic, until i got super poor and switched to public school. As someone who is not a breadwinner, largely due to mental illness, that has definitely made me very reluctant to date. I'm not typical in any masculine sense really, but i still feel that pressure to be a provider.
I think the toxic notions about gender roles are far more widespread than Nick seems to be aware of. But it is possible I'm projecting & generalizing from my own experience.
It's sad that there are so many people who are so convinced of those toxic notions that they turn into toxic people and blame women for it. I was a budding edge lord when i was younger and I'm so glad & fortunate i grew out of it.
And i do appreciate Nick's acknowledgement that some of those toxic misconceptions are genuinely from experience and not just individuals being crazy or bad or whatever.
1. Gender roles in a relationship are not "toxic" just cause you say so
2. Women have their own "toxic" BS yet you leftists love to ignore that
@@reed6514 Proud of you dude :) 💜 stepping out of that toxic reality that you were in is a brave step you have taken towards your healing. I wish you the best, you got this!
I’d pay money to receive a high ted talk in person while also high 🤨 would be some next level brain shit
I want a bagel now
Same champ
Pb and banana bagels was how i gained weight while being broke af. Do recommend. Oh pb is also good af in ramen, get the chunky kind.
I've never heard one women complain about a guys wallet it was always about how they were treated
nick you are blessing us with this content🙏🙏 here is your crown king 👑
Relationship therapy tedtalks with Nick? Yes, please.
There's a shit ton of vintage black and white photographs of men in distinguished attire sitting in their friend's laps, holding hands and cuddling. I think about those photographs every time modern day men won't even hug or hold their male friend's hand when they're going through some shit. Men who have good friends that love them don't talk like this. No matter your gender, friends don't let friends become incels.
You're essentially saying friends pay for each others prostitutes, if being wingman doesn't work out organically... It irritates me to no end how the average person has no idea what the word "incel" actually means. It's not an insult, it's a state of affairs that has no bearing on a person's character.
The worst thing about being a man is running away from wasps. Right? Fellow men?
White anglo saxon protestants? Yea
@@banquetoftheleviathan1404 Damn, that went over my head. I'm sorry, mate.
Me personally the wors thing is when the 😂😂😂
I would love to hear more of your thoughts on relationships and the ways in which you intentionally connect and communicate with others.
I think the idea that a lot of times men are only appreciated when they work/make money/provide is true on a larger scale. The thing is, a lot of men seem to not know or understand that that is misogyny at work. And that the opposite is also true for women: they're only appreciated by society when they get married/have kids/are a 'good wife'
Yeah I feel there definitely is a societal pressure for men to act and be a certain way. Speaking for myself, I was often made fun of for being more emotional or not taking part in physical activities. I denied counselling for years because people said that was "for pussies". When I was applying for college, I was told not to go into psychology because it was no place for a man. And when I got into college, they were thanking me because of how rare it is to see men in the program. I still get comments made about me being a psych student well into my senior year, and there's always somebody there to call me slurs when I cry or take up a more domestic role.
There's a societal pressure on men that results from "the patriarchy" as it's called where men are expected to be the breadwinner of the house and to be logical and emotionally distant. It is a disadvantage for men that you are more likely to commit suicide because mental health is so stigmatized for men that it's not a realistic option for them. It's just not a systemic issue, there's no government systems or laws that prevent it, but it's a sociological one. It's definitely not a case by case thing, just as much as it's not a case by case situation for women to have those gendered behaviors and expectations forced on them. It's a part of the same system.
Now of course the issues that women face are in more need of correction. You should be allowed to walk outside and not be harassed or assaulted, you should have the same high paying job opportunities, you shouldn't be disregarded on issues because "you feel too much to be objective". However, this is a multifaceted issue. A part of fixing the it is destigmatizing these traditionally feminine things and acknowledge there are male issues too. Maybe if we did and made empathy, proper anger management, and general self care a less stigmatized thing for men, then maybe this road to equality might be smoother and less radicalized.
TL:DR
In the patriarchy, everyone loses. Men, you're not oppressed but it is valid to feel stereotyped and targeted for not being "masculine enough". The "women have intrinsic value and men don't" point is bullshit. Women aren't after your money, assholes are, stop being sexist. Advocate for women's rights, make mental health a human issue and not a girl's only thing, and let's fix this stupid world we all live in.
Love ya Nick, just thought this should be said
I relate to all of this
"my value as a human being is tied more to my utility/economic value than my humanity"
that's not being a man that's just existing in end stage capitalism bro women have this issue too
I think the answer would be just doing away with gender roles and our ideas of what makes a man/woman, let people just exist as humans however fits them best...
the title already made me laugh
Nick your laugh makes my whole day better every time.
wow- i watched a almost year old video of yours where u judged spotify wrapped (because its almost that time again lol) and just happened to come across this one, and i think you are spot on.
To be honest i sometimes get into a bad headspace because i see all of these comments about "men arent valuable aside from their money" or "men have to provide something to be loved" or whatever. its not that ive personally experienced what those comments are describing, but i also havent experienced much at all because im not the most social person ever, and truthfully ill never be able to really see things from womens point of view... but... with that being said when you say that its just about who you surround yourself with, i completely agree. i think its not just men who surround themselves with the wrong people but also women. there are miserable women like this too, and i think the miserable women are fueling the miserable men in a way and the other way around. i always see some men being upset that some women for example say "men are trash" or what not, which is probably largely something caused by hookup culture, and i think that creates some lashing out from men that either have bad experiences with women, or no experiences at all. its almost always a echo chamber of people fueling the same fire. they just resound the same problem and confirm their biases by having others agreeing with them and their experiences/opinions.
confirmation bias probably releases dopamine or something, because i know there are plenty of people that surround themselves with regular people that dont have those same issues as they do, but i almost never see them in the same social circles or discussions on the internet.
so yea people surround themselves with the wrong people and stay stuck in the same negative loop that way.
Why does nick remind me of the dude that did the “ I just got diagnosed with cool kids syndrome , now I have to take aderall “ vine ? 😂
“higher expectations” lmaooo the standards are on the floor with most women. one of my girl friends said “yeah he treats me bad but at least he bought me flowers after” like dude, dont even speak. 😂
This is so sad 😭
@Sine Nomine nah girl you deserve better than that. there ARE good men out there. havent found them yet?? but thats what my mom says idk. probably gonna be single for a long time. i wish you luck on your search 🥰 keep those standards high
Nick, you've really got your RUclips groove going great lately!
speaking as someone with a bleached buzzcut i think youd look pretty cool with a bleached buzzcut
Well it’s Reddit what did you expect, civilized conversation?
I feel (warning: nuance) this conversation is -more then people realize sometimes- swayed by how different the backgrounds of people in these online discussions are.
There can be people from all around the world with vastly different cultural, religious, family wise backgrounds.
100% in an online debate if you say. "Women/men do x" it is going to be true somewhere. I believe even most people are genuine when saying this and may have had these experiences. But people reading it greatly underestimate how different their experience is going to be
I did buzz my head and I am ugly. However, I am not a man. What went wrong here.
I love how much more commentary and originality I’ve been seeing in your videos recently :) I remember your video about youtube making it difficult to manage your content to consumer ratio when it comes to changing your style at ALL. I’ve been loving your recent main and side channel videos and it seems like you enjoy it too :)
Yes pleaseee cover your thoughts on relationships and soulmates and stuff I feel like that’d be really valuable and interesting so please please do!
good to know!!!!
I have followed you for like a year and I’ve always liked your videos alot but I really like the direction where they are going and I can see that you do hard work to make your videos more entertaining and fun and I really appreciate it. Your videos always makes day sm better, keep it up:)
Nick's videos would be better IF he actually went out of his comfort zone to talk to people that he dislikes or hates.
@@chris135x he has done that
i think i can speak for everyone when i say we would absolutely watch nick’s ted talk about relationships
LOLZ no. You literally only speak for yourself. You are not the Lorax, kid. And Nick really should listen to other people before covering a topic. He needs a new perspective.
@@chris135x Aren't you now speaking for everyone in saying they only speak for themself and they're wrong?
@@TylerDeVenny It doesn't work that way, kid. Like wow. You're immature and it shows. You leftist have the most difficult time being mature and rational.
@@chris135x I see you all over this comment section. I recommend therapy for any internalized problems you might be facing.
@@djfebrezee Lolz internal problems? Like what exactly? Tell me what my "internalized problems" are. Are you sure you just don't like what I say?
"can't get into a disagreement with a woman without being accused of abuse"
no. you can't be abusive without being accused of abused. there, fixed it for ya. abusers playing the victims now smh
Nick I feel like your content has been getting better and better. That's pretty cool
The buzzed hair bit is so funny after Danny shaved his head
Danny?
@@SaraRankins. Gonzalez
@@elirae9419 he did WHAT
@@SaraRankins. he posted it on twitter 😭😭
Edit: he hasnt made a vid with his shaved head yet i think
8:35 to say that these circumstances arise because "men themselves set those standards" is a bit reductionist, people of all genders reinforce the patriarchy (sometimes without realizing it). It's not enough to change male behavior, we need to change everyone's behavior surrounding the active enforcement of binary gender roles.
Subbing for that ted talk on relationships and intimacy
congrats on 500k homie you're a great voice on the platform
every bloke that complains that “women only want me for my money” has a negative balance in their bank account
what money bruv?
Okay. Just dismiss that there ARE women out there who date men for their wealth or status. Just because you don't see it means it never happens, right? Like r*pe. I don't see it happening so it must never happen.
@@chris135x
Of course there are women like that in the world, where did OP say there wasn’t?
nobody asked but the music at 12:39 when nick is slow-mo punching the air is the erhu version of rhythms from the conch by HOYO-MiX and Yu-peng Chen :D
omg yeah i thought it was a genshin soundtrack!!
love when you rift!!! Definitely wanna hear more of ur perspective on relationships!!!
As much as I love your curly hair, I know how much of a struggle it can be😅 And I honestly think you’d look good with a buzz cut!
Really dig the "riffing" format. You seem to have a lot of good thoughts on relationships, men, and masculinity. Genuinely would listen to this as like a podcast on my commute. Good stuff!
Nick is truly the best feminist
Gotta get me some of that womb value that means my pain is more respected than men despite every social study on the matter within the medical field saying the opposite that womens pain is ignored and undervalued
Nick please don’t feel bad for hiring some help and begging for friends to help you move. It’s not possible to work AND move AND stay sane.
You are such a fresh of breath air. Thank you for talking about these things. I appreciate how you always consider other groups’ perspectives. To have a conversation, we have to be fair, and that means acknowledging all sides. Things like this lead us to a more unified world 👍
Nick? What? That guy has no idea how to understand a perspective that isn't his own. He doesn't want open conversations.
@@chris135x Neither do you
me when men are bad :( me when men are based :)
in my experience most men who think women are after their money, don't actually have money...