i can't believe this happened...
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- Опубликовано: 28 сен 2024
- TW: BRIEF MENTION OF TRAUMA FROM AB*SE
I sincerely could not have imagined this would be able to happen even just a few years ago...really, really grateful. 💜
@Trauma Talk follow up video: • I FACED My WORST PTSD ...
My FIRST Attempt at Pueblo: • Pueblo, Colorado: My A...
My SECOND Visit to Pueblo: • Confronting Where I Wa...
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MY STORY //
Fourteen years of pain and failed ankle surgeries brought me to 2018, when I made the difficult decision to become a twenty-seven-year-old below-the-knee elective amputee. This channel is to document my journey of amputation surgery, recovery, and reclaiming my life.
MY PROSTHETIC LEG:
I use the Ossur ProFlex XC Torsion foot/ankle with a direct socket with passive vaccum suction.
MY AMPUTATION STORY - IN VIDEO:
Why Did I Lose My Leg? • HOW I BECAME AN AMPUTE...
How I Said Goodbye To My Leg: • COME WITH ME ON A GOOD...
Seeing My Amputated Leg for the First Time: • Seeing my amputated le...
Day in the Life of an Amputee: • A Day in the Life of a...
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#amputee #amputeedriving
![State of Play | September 24, 2024 [ENGLISH]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/fVs0suPHAX8/mqdefault.jpg)
I got diagnosed with PTSD last year when my repressed memory of my assault came to the forefront of my mind. Then this time last year something happened that caused me to have a complete mental breakdown. I've managed to keep myself alive and even though certain things will trigger me and I dissociate frequently I'm less scared of the dark and less hypervigilant. I also managed to graduate even though my grades tanked and went from the highest possible grades to the worst possible grade. It's a really long road ahead but I'm not going to let the awful things that people have done to me ruin my life. Thanks for sharing your story Jo it's really comforting to know that we're not alone in this experience of PTSD.
I also got diagnosed with PTSD, but the diagnoses is still very recent. Mine was caused by suddenly losing my dad to a massive heart attack, and being directly involved with giving him CPR (he ended up dying on the table in the hospital). This happened on March 24, and the COVID mess was just beginning. That caused me to sprial into a major depresssion with anxiety, and to suicidal ideations, which then led me to being being inpatient at a local mental hospital for several weeks, where I nearly attempted suicide twice. However, I have been seeing an amazing trauma therapist from very on (like days after my dad's funeral), who has been amazing with me. Plus, I am on medications, which has really helped with balancing out my brain. I just wish that COVID didn't get in the way and take away my major coping mechanisms (band, ice skating, gymnastics, and running in groups). However, I have discovered art, and that has been IMMENSLY helpful with describing what I'm going through.
Don't feel bad i have PTSD from sexual assault
You could grow a new foot in the time it takes to heal from that kind of betrayal that happened to you. A lost limb is just that, a lost limb. Lost trust and self confidence is life altering, they don't make prosthesis for that.
Such a true statement. 💜 They don't make prosthetics for that indeed. Thank you for being here. 💜
Very wise advice for everyone
I’m so proud of you. I still cringe when I drive past a certain exit, but I feel like I have grown so much stronger.
Major congratulations!!!! That's a huge step. I think trauma is a little like being an addict - it's something that's always with you - you just learn to live better with it. I hit 20 years this year. I am so proud of you 👍👍🌞🌞🌞
Team: we love Jo! ❤️❤️❤️
Awww thank you!!
Jo you are SO fucking strong. You inspire me to be better.
@@FootlessJo 😘💪🏻❤️
thank you thank you thank youuuu
In the immortal words of Dr. Peter Venkman: Jo went, Jo saw, Jo KICKED its ass!!!!
Everything you said in this video hit me like a brick I've been through the same thing, 3 years ago and still fighting through it. I have a hard time talking about it to the point where very few people know anything. Its nice to know that it get better. Maybe I'll get stronger as well. I love you jo!
I experienced major trauma numerous times in my childhood.
I've had recurring clinical depression as an adult.
In the healing process changes happen when they happen. You can't hurry them along. You can't force them to happen. You can't fast forward. Glad to see you've reached that point where they happen. It feels wonderful., doesn't it?
One thing always carries me out of my darkest moments: knowing everything is temporary. “This too shall pass.” I, continually, use this as a mantra.
Some of my best moments of self growth have been impulsive decisions made in moments of sudden emotional clarity and feeling capable of real change. I feel like they’re rare, but recognizing those urges and allowing yourself to experience “the pull” so to speak can lead to powerful progress, even in tiny amounts. Congrats Jo, on listening to and trusting yourself so well, and being brave enough to follow through. :) This can be a new personal positive thing to remember for you in October.
Good on you. The time was right in your head. You let it and came out the other side. That is hard to trust when you have been so broken
little fact because we all need a bit of cheering after this story: in Spanish, pueblo means village. Therefore if this "city/town" sucks it's just because it's a village trying too hard to be a town.
Honestly it sounds like going forward was not the easiest thing, but oh man! you have shown this blob of cell (no, I'm not giving them the title of human being) and this pueblo place, that YOU are the bigger person, you have grown so much, you thrive despite all the sticks that have been (are) thrown at you. You showed them and everyone else that what you went through made you kinder, when you had all the reasons/rights to become mean, angry and petty (more than the normal level of pettiness almost everyone has in them, that is). This is one way of being powerful and inspiring. I'm proud that someone who is (unfortunately) also part of the "my life changed because of a horse fall/accident" club is someone as fabulous as you. I truly look up to you and realise that there are things I cannot do but I can choose how I react and act on the fact I don't get to do them; and also, that trying and not succeeding the first time doesn't mean I failed. Giving up is.
Much love from the horse rider, dog lover and snowboard addict from Switzerland
P.S. keep being you, please. The world is a much better place with you and your amazing energy and attitude
I understand what you are describing and i know how tough this would have been, i am so happpy for you that you have found your path through such a big trigger. Thank you for sharing because it helps the rest of us know there is a way through the darkness back to the light
So so happy that you were able to overcome this, well done you, it’s absolutely fantastic and I’m glad to be witnessing your journey and progress. Wishing you nothing but the best 💛
Nothing like this should ever happen to everyone. I would have never been able to push through this, you are so brave!
You might be surprised at what you are capable of in the moment. Believe in your strength and courage. Your life may depend on that resilience someday.
Absolutely! Recovery isn’t linear. I’ve been back to my old, affectionate self recently after so many years being touch averse from the abusive relationship I was in 6 years ago. Those victories feel good and should be recognized
Well Done Jo!!! That is big news and im so proud of you!! Huge hugs xx
Jo, thank you for always being so forthcoming with your trauma journeys. I have dealt with a good deal of trauma in my life, but was blessed with a wonderful mother who also shared my tendency towards mental health challenges, and over the years, we had worked through many of our challenges together. On Sept 29th I went to her house to go spend the day with her, and found her body instead, dead of a likely heart attack at only 58. Having to process everything these past two months, without my favorite person to do it with, has been so helped by watching many of your videos. So just wanted to thank you. Much love.
This is a huge step forward for you I believe! Being able to face things associated with the trauma successfully takes a great deal of courage and healing. I am very happy for you Jo! Thank you for sharing this story. I'm sure it will give hope to others.
I understand how you feel when you talked about dissociation. I myself struggle with it and I wish I had the courage to do what you did! That was so brave of you and I'm glad you are ok. :)
So proud of you for going down there and for the progress you’ve made! I went through a similar trauma for 4 years with my ex husband, I hear you tell this part of your story and I recognize that feeling. Totally get the difficulty going back to the place, and the “weird” triggers. You’re doing terrific, I’m cheering you on!
Jo, I’m currently a cadet at the Air Force Academy. Thank you for the inspiration to overcome hurdles, l admire you :)
You are so strong everything you have already gone through and then face all of this and go through is amazing and to still fight your flight or fight and to face something that has traumatized you even if it is just a location. Any time i think of my home state i feel pressure in my chest along with dread/anxiety now I am soo happy to live in Colorado with amazing people like yourself!!
I'm so proud of you Jo! You did what many others aren't strong enough, YET, to do. You are such an inspiration to so many. Sending you all my love ❤
So proud of you. It's empowering to take back areas that have previously been taken from us from abuse and trauma, at least partially. It's okay to not be okay by the way. Some days it might be harder to go there/past there and that's okay too.
PS. I might be teary 😅 Very relatable and just ugh, I really fell this.
So many of the things you said in this video I just want to have embroidered up on my wall to look at and remember.... cuz things have been super hard, and I'm glad to hear stories like this to remember I won't feel this shitty forever. Thank you Jo.
Thank you for making this video.
Oh my days. That was emotional. I can so relate. I'm so glad you are doing better now! Me too.
You're awesome!!! Stay strong! You've got tons of people supporting you!
Hearts and Love that you made it this far. I... still struggle with my assault from five years ago. It is such a constant fight with my brain. "Today, it's 2020, not 2015.. Come on. Relax.." and other times it is just full on panic. So unpredictable. But i didn't know this person.. which is harder at times.
Incredible story, the power of intuition, sharing this milestone. Thank you a thousand times Jo x
I’m always supporting you Jo! Your so strong! Keep it up ❤️❤️❤️❤️
I am so incredibly proud of you Jo!!! ❤️
Your video really moved me. I don't even know what part, all I know is that I feel so honoured that you shared this experience with all of us
This helped me understand my awful dissociation when I visited an epicenter of one of traumas. That visit was over a decade ago and still feels weird. I really didn't get why my plow- through-it methods didn't benefit me. I can release some of the shame I have carried about how I felt I reacted poorly while in that state of mind there. It's an old trauma that your videos shed light on for me. I appreciate the gentle compassionate way you share healing and hope. Your videos are a safe place to unpack that little suitcase I've tucked away and let a little go each time. Thank you. 😏
Deep, 8 mins in and wow, i feel you, even if i havent felt this trauma myself, you are very brave to have done this, especially after *that* experience. You are a great inspiration for young and elderly, trying to face trauma, fears and stress and things, places they associate with those feelings. Thankyou for holding yourself together during this video, towards the end I saw you felt like you wanted to cry, you are allowed to! It is ok to cry on camera, especially during telling a story just like this. You are awsome, you go girl!!!!!! ❤👍👏👏👏
When I saw the title of the video I thought something bad had happened. That your PTSD had been triggered for whatever reason. I am SO glad I was wrong and that you were able to do this! I’m proud of you for taking this huge step in defeating those demons! Well done!
Trauma, quite literally, changes your brain. If you haven’t read, “The Body Keeps the Score,” please DO. It helped me tremendously in my journey just to understand exactly what happened to me physically and mentally after my trauma.
I am in the middle of reading that book and it is amazing! I was going to recommend it until I saw your comment.
@@jennifermaddox2524 Ditto! I've been (very) slowly making my way through this book. However, I do forewarn people that there are chapters in there about sexual assault, and the first few chapters can be quite grusome, thinking about how much your brain changes from trauma. However, it is worth the read.
Wow, Jo! So amazing! It really is a big deal! Thanks for sharing this step in your recovery.
I'm so sorry for You. That You had to go through and are still going through such abominable trauma. The reasons this happens in the four corners of our world have to change. People have the right to live their lives in peace and with Peace Of Mind.
And for You to be able to go back to the place that place that was the very and scene of the thing that traumatised You is not only a victory. But You have every right to claim that Victory ......
And I hope the very act of doing and putting together this post, didn't send You to a dark place...... ☮️⚛️🦋🌏
Thank you for sharing Jo!! This gives me hope 💕💕
That is such a huge accomplishment! I feel you. I’m so proud of you!!
Hi:) nice to see you. Thanks for being amazing. I’m trying to make the best of my situation but it’s so hard with constant pain. My femur knee and shin are titanium and I have no muscles. It hurts just tensing it a little moving it at all. Every step. For 12 years. I feel so alone wish they could regrow bones. Xo happy holidays. And beams of light to you
It’ll be my 5 year therapy anniversary in March. It feels like I’ve made little progress as there are still major problems I’m having difficulty moving past, but hearing your victories reminds me to be proud of myself too. Good job Jo, reap those benefits ❤️
Kudos to you!! I have not experienced what you went through, but something similar and due to unfortunate events that I do not want to publish on the internet I had a sort of forceful exposure and luckily the dangerous person is not present anymore and all is well
It's so interesting to hear how different people can feel about a place. I spent the last year in Alamosa, so I always associated Pueblo with mundane things like Target. I'm so sorry that horrible things happened to you, but I'm glad you're continuing on your recovery journey. Also, if you're able to drive past Pueblo, check out the San Luis Valley! It's a beautiful place, and there's lots of places to drive and hike. I think you and the doggos would like it ❤️
wow this video was really inspiring at the end when she was talking about how much we go threw we will make it out and thats what happend with me because ive been taking me depression medicine for a week now and I do feel happy and I never thought I ever would feel this way again.
I always love your greeting!
Proud of ya Jo for being able to face that and you are right to be proud of yourself for facing the demon and celebrating victory over darkness
This video hit me hard. It is exactly what I needed right now that I didn’t know I needed.
I have PTSD from my childhood as well as from losing my older brother.
I don’t know if I will ever be able to handle going to the states again, especially Minneapolis (where my brother died).
Christmas is hitting so hard on top of me having 2 emerg surgeries in less then a month.
SO so soooo proud of you. PTSD is so hard and tackling can also be really hard. I am hugging you and saying i am proud! Love you Jo. Grateful to be your internet friend.
-Spence
Love, Love, Love !!
I have a similar trigger. There is a quite large part of my town that I associate with my abuser and any time in the last 5 years I have had to go there, I get really anxious and disassociate. Luckily I don't have to go to this part of town so it is not an issue for me. You're story really inspired me, though. Maybe one day when I am ready I will have to face my fears.
Jo, I’m so happy for you and for the progress you’ve made! You’ve worked hard to get out of a dark place to get to this point, and the fact that you chose to go to the place of your trauma and were fine there inspires me. I have experienced some abuse from my parents, (nothing physical or sexual and I’m sure nothing as traumatic as what you have been through, but hard on me nonetheless) and for this reason I have negative association with the state/town my parents currently live in, which is also the place I experienced the worst period of depression I have been through. I’m tentatively planning to spend a week at my parents house later this month (if covid allows) and I’m very nervous! I’m also seeing a therapist weekly so I can have some guidance with whether this is the right decision and how to handle this. Thanks for sharing your story because it resonated with me. I wish you well on continuing your trauma recovery journey!
Congratulations Jo:) You're awesome and strong!
I'm so proud of you Jo and love watching you, hope you're having a good day. ❤
Two thumbs up for your victory.
Congratulations. Always trust yourself.
You are a true warrior. I find wisdom in your words.
You are so brave to face the things that has happened, but just remember. Keep a positive outlook. You can concur anything.
I really needed to hear this right now. Thank you. 😭
Well done! 💙💜
I find you really inspiring Jo :)
I know what you are feeling❤️ I also have the same issues regarding a place near me due to something similar you have experienced. Proud of you Jo❤️
I'm so incredibly proud of you, that's such a win!
Hey hon. I totally understand your victory, it may be small to other's but it's huge to you. December and May are by far the worst months for me. December because well xmas was huge for my mom (she's been gone almost 9 years next May, and well now you know why May is hard for me too). Also last year in December my father passed away. It's so hard being vulnerable, and open, and I commend you for that. Self care is so important to me too. Love ya hon, keep being you.
Team like before actually watching because i know that it will be a great video.
Good for u hun. I've had a ton of trauma in many parts of my town too. Nvr had the prob of fully not being able to go intact I constantly have too but I deff know how u feel
Very brave journey! I applaud you! I've been in an abusive relationship also. A long time ago, but it's never forgotten. But I have been able to move past it.
Trauma is not a joke and it is huge for you to be able to go there and be ok and use the experience to let some of that trauma go.
Your an extremely brave person never forget that.
Your stunning jo so so sorry that happened to you your such a strong beautiful person no one deserves that love you jo
I can understand the fear for a place. I was scared of driving past my old house where my father lived, scared of going back to sertain schools I went too. obviously mine are quite a bit smaller areas. I once went back to the first school I ever went to. I didn't go inside but just walking around again and sitting on the spot I always sat on did relive a lot of the stress and pain I had associated with that place.
So proud of you Jo. Your such a beautiful, amazing, strong woman.
Congratulations on being able to face some of your worst fears. I can only attempt to understand what you have gone through.
This is so great, I am so glad you managed to do this and that you felt you could share it 💜 you are amazing.
Just wanna say thank you for this Video :)
I'm sorry for what you went through I'm glad you did it .hope kick it's ass .I'm proud of you. I to I'm scared and I'm 59 years old .in 2023 .u understand. Trauma I never listen. To anyone u r they only one I came back home .I really understand what your saying. 36 plus years I came home in 2015. Love u lots jo pat❤
I felt that same panic and triggering with the town my biological dad lives in. Its twebty minutes away from my city and I had to close my eyes or be distracted to get to the closest mall. Im so glad I don't cry driving past the town anymore.
Omg I am so proud of you!
Love you Jo your stories so inspirational and inspires me so much every day 😘🤗
You’re awesome! October 30th is also a really bad day for my PTSD, it’s the day I almost died in surgery, it was 11 years ago this year
Last year I actually had a Doctor’s appointment in the same hospital as the near death experience on the 30th, it was such a weird experience
very happy for you that your very brave
i'm sure you'll do fine, your quite brave so it's nothin' to worry 'bout
I have a pretty good idea what you were going through. I had horrible things happen to me in two different cities: Detroit and Milwaukee. Now, one I lived in for a year as a teenager because my mother moved us there from L.A.. I still have physical impairments, a knee that I can't trust among other things, from that city. The other was where I was physically and mentally abused by my ex husband. Yeah. I can't even see pictures of either of these cities without something dark entering into my brain. Than God I live back in L.A. and I will never, EVER, go back to either of those two cities.
Im so happy for you
Jo, I’m so proud of you! 😊
I am so sorry for you
Is there another arty live tomorrow? I’ve been really enjoying them even though I haven’t been able to watch al of them with the whole time difference thing but when I can watch them live it’s lots of fun. So thanks for doing them ☺️.
Your pup is gorgeous
You have a great deal of strength. Not my story to tell, but I follow a biker chic on Instagram who lost a leg and rode again after. Not just ride, but ride well enough she's going to race.
This video helped me thank you
Good for you!
Oh wow, jo, just wanted you to know, WE LOVE YOU!!!!
Thank you.
Yay Jo !
I feel you
Fear can have 2 meanings f* every thing and run or Face every thing and rise
Don't worry, I hate pueblo too even though I live here.
hi jo!!!