Can you a make a video on how to stay calm because I always get so stressed out whenever I hear something that upsets I started panicking my head hurts and I always feel like crying 😟
I feel like high functioning depression is like getting used to depression, making it a normal of your life. Like “I am breathing and the depression inside me sucks up all of my energy secretly and I live that way.”
I honestly just thought everybody secretly hates life. Because surely they do!? I mean what is there to like about it? I'm pretty old now and after a lifetime of feeling that way there doesn't appear to be any improvement of way out so... Surely everybody battles to start the day.
It’s like I’ve lived this way for so long that depression is my normal, but it’s ok because it doesn’t really hurt I’m just comfortably numb or something most days
When someone says "you don't seem depressed". Me: Yeah, that's the point. I'm intentionally attempting to avoid being constantly questioned by everyone about it.
"I'm just tired" was my go-to answer when someone managed to sneak a look behind my mask, it was such an acceptable answer that people just shrugged and moved on.
This is a very astute description of how it feels. Energetic people don't seem to get it. You feel like you're working against yourself, fighting a battle...everyday.
Life becomes a downhill struggle. Reaching out feels like including others in the fatal vortex.Too sick to pray.Too sad to be useful to anyone or for anything. " Among the voices voiceless that throng your hiddenness".
Exactly. If something I’ve been ruminating on sucks energy out of me I need to force myself to do something completely unrelated and lose myself in it in order to overcome those negative feelings. The problem is, the thing that I am avoiding is something that I need to accomplish while what I did accomplish is probably not as important.
The most beautiful thing my friend said to me once, when I couldn't get out of bed, was: "Don't worry, you'll be able to get up sooner or later, no matter how long it takes, I'll be waiting for you" 🌻
Tesla referenced human energy 🌪👻jesus christ referenced living waters science described water memory 🌊👨🎓existence reflecting psychologically psalms16:24 k,j 👻💎🤍👨🎓💖🌪
Exactly, I refused to hide my depression when I was working, and I kept getting told things like " smile and get over yourself." Which made it worse. There was also much worse said to me and due to the bullying I now have such bad social anxiety that I can't work or even leave the house.
I remember being on shifts and once in a while I’d ask to sit down for 5mins and have a glass of water as my depression or anxiety was getting really bad and i needed a breather. Was constantly told to work through it or had eyes rolled at me “didn’t you take your tablets today”. And then 5minutes later someone would ask for a smoke break and take 15minutes out of work which is fine and no questions asked.
For me my energy levels do go up around other people. That is, people I like and around whom I feel comfortable. As soon as I'm home, even with my daughter there, I slump right back into what I call my funk.
If a person whose leg is broken is lying or sitting on the ground you don't say, "Pick yourself up!", you help them up or get help from someone who knows the best way to assist. Maybe this analogy will help people who don't know depression understand.
@@melo_maniac9983 i know.. but its just a lie we tell ourselves when all hope is lost... bcs no one would understand and we desperately want to feel better.
This is why you have to change your focus. I get this very well. But I never say, "I hate myself" anymore. I say "I hate my life." It sounds trivial but there is a difference. Concentrating hatred on yourself is destructive, but focusing on your life, can change things for the better.
I struggle with this. Where I live, it's considered required by much of society to be intolerant of any signs of depression in oneself or others. It's been so bad sometimes, where people will shout in your face or harm you, or even ignore your basic needs, that you feel like all you want is to break them utterly... So they'll eventually learn that their ignorance is what causes depression. The worst part is that, sometimes we become the monster that leads ourselves and others deeper into darkness.
I have substance abuse issues. I was able to hide it for many years. No one could tell until I came clean about it. I would presume that depressed relate.
@@SkoopyghostTrue; but like with substance abuse, sometimes two people with the same problem can be dangerous for each other. For example, if they handle their substance abuse or depression differently. Perhaps one might be high-functioning, while the other is not. This can cause either one to lash out at the other, for various reasons. Sometimes I've been cruel to people with chronic depression/anxiety, even though I've had it for most of my life... Opening up to others who might be like yourself, can be extremely difficult, and even traumatic. If you live in a community that doesn't tolerate signs of depression, some of those with depression will become intolerant of others with depression. It's a vicious cycle, but one that can be remedied if we're merciful with each other, and ourselves.
I hate this feeling when I really cannot concentrate on anything or just get my work done ,but people just think I'm lazy while I am struggling with my anxiety, this video says something that I wish people could understand 😔
I hate when I’m having a “good” day and something small immediately makes it into a bad one, such small things can cause me to break so easily even if I was successful and okay just before.
So true. I feel like every time I have the rare experience of feeling good or if something good happens, I end up falling into a deep, black pit of despair. It’s like I get punished for having good experiences.
Oh gosh, yes. For me, it even doesn't have to be a bad thing that's directed at me specifically. Could be just watching the news while eating dinner with family - or just reading hate/negativity on social media.
Yep. I told my mom about being depressed, she said she’s get me a therapist. Fast forward a year with no therapist, I was even worse. More depressed, anxious, suicidal. I told my dad and he said he’d get me help. Luckily he did, but when I asked him why my mom didn’t get me one when I first told her, he said “we thought you’d gotten better”. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I had just gotten better at pretending. Seriously, pretending to be happy has just become second nature to me
I've had a psychiatrist tell me to my face "You look fine." The invalidation I've received from mental health professionals makes me shudder every time I go to make an appointment. My mask is freaking amazing until I take it off or a hole gets poked in it.
That's also one of the things that scare me the most and prevent me from getting an appointment. The other thing is feeling like I'm wasting their time
I really get that. My psychiatrist told me, in spanish, something that could be translated to 'I think you're more confused than depressed'. The word he used was 'liada'. I felt really invalidated.
Your mask is amazing in the sense that a virus can be amazing. (At least that's what it felt like for me, it was super effective in it's purpose, but not helping anyone. I'm still learning not to wear it.)
The hardest part is that even when you show this to someone, they don't really understand. They counter that they also feel those negative thoughts sometimes, or have a bad day where everything drains your energy, and they think everyone has those. That it's just a normal part of life. What they don't understand is that their energy sucking bad days are my baseline. That I can go below their most bad days, but hardly have a "normal" day like they have, and it all, constantly, uses up energy. Another problem is that if you can explain your situation, most people feel that knowing that is half the battle. You know the problem, so you can fix it, right? Wrong. Knowing the problem means you are aware you are different. Being aware just adds to the guilt and shame that is keeping you down as well. it's a nice vicious circle.
This is the time Like what I feel this right now More than ever What I do about it? Keep Isolate myself completely To Try to heal my own mind Which is always bad But sometimes Breakly bad at overwhelming Just think in everything amd just to hate yourself To The bone I’m Isolate myslef Even if I will gonna be back I’m gonna Have more than you show Speak less than you know
@@lovemrj4ever yeah 😕 it’s so emotionally draining to get up for me cuz I mean I could just stay in my cozy bed and not be worried about people judging me cuz I can just sit there and not think just exist and not have any worries
@@random_potato2756 💖💗I know. I really know. Sending you lots of hugs. Just know you’re not alone. There are a lot of us struggling warriors out there. Our victories are won second by second🌟
Psilocybin saved my life. I was addicted to heroin for 15 years and after Psilocybin treatment I will be 3 years clean in September. I have zero cravings. This is something that truly needs to be more broadly used in addiction treatment.
Please does anyone know where I can get them? I put so much on my plate and it really affects my stress and anxiety levels, I would love to try shrooms
Psychedelics saved me from years of uncontrollable depression, anxiety and illicit pill addiction. imagine carrving heavy chains for over a decade and then all of a sudden that burden is gone. Believe it or not in a couple years they'll be all over for treatment of mental health related issues.
The Trips I've been having have really helped me a lot,I finally feel in control of my emotions and my future and things that used to be mundane to me now seem incredible and full of nuance on top of that I'm way less driven by my ego and I have alot more empathy as well
That's really good. opiates and the worst i know cause I've been hooked on them myself off & on ever since the Dr kept giving them to me when I was only 16 .good for physical pain not emotional pain.
I hate when I tell people how I feel and they tell me how other people have worst than me. But I was just expressing what I was feeling and not complaining. This is the main reason why I don’t share my depressed feelings with other people. I leave the conversation feeling like a waste of space and time.
I feel ya. I'll catch myself halfway into a daydream and then just sit there zoned out for like 5 minutes before I have the energy to concentrate again.
"My good day may be your normal day" - this is so poignant. I have small victories that sound kind of lame when I share them with others. Telling someone, "Hey, guess what? Today in a meeting I didn't beat myself up when someone pointed out a mistake I made" just loses its meaning when you say it out loud to someone. Thank you for posting this video.
“Whenever someone tells me to ‘Just be happy,’ I want to yell, ‘Oh, hey, depression’s gone! Why didn’t I think of that?’ But usually I just roll my eyes instead.” -Anonymous
Sending love and support all the way from the middle east! I hope your managing. here is my email if you DESIRE to talk to someone (I'm not a therapist) Just want to show that you're not alone! You can comment, of course, your choice. super246484@gmail.com
@@MeemahSN Their music got me through the toughest times (being a 12-year-old who had to go to court in defense against my father, and being put into foster care).
We remain "high functional" until the moment we can't anymore. It was my biggest mistake, taking so long to seek for help. Don't take too long and don't pay attention to what others think. Only you know how you feel and how you're hurting.
But how? Just pick a therapist or psychiatrist in your area and make an appointment? They work 8a-5p M-F so you have to explain to your boss you need to take time off to see a what? A doctor? Your boss will want to know how your medical issue will affect your work so now you have to tell them it's phycological. Regardless of how nice your boss is, this will shatter your faced at work (so you need to be ready for a REALLY bad day in your own head). Additionally, lots of insurance don't really say if they cover phycological help, most people don't know if they're covered or if they can afford it. True mental health awareness in this country will first work on sheer accessibility to the help you need such as, I don't know, WEEKEND APPOINTMENTS!! - I'm not yelling at you its just the volcano this issue prods within me.
@@kruz2582 Well, every case is different and I understand your concern. In my case, I had to try with 3 different psychologists until I found one that could attend to me at a compatible time. But it was worth it. My quality of life has improved a lot and I feel much happier. I hope you get it too.
Tesla referenced human energy 👻🌪jesus christ referenced living waters 🤍💎science described water memory 🌊👨🎓existence reflecting psychologically psalms16:24 k,j 👻🤍💎👨🎓💖🗽🌪
If you are struggling with depression, I can tell you that in most cases it can be dealt with. Though my depression has been under control for years, I remember what it was like. I was super high functioning, because I’d always felt pressure to be perfect. I hid it very, very well, even from myself. I could work effectively, go out, laugh, have fun. But inside I was constantly criticizing myself. Everything was gray. There were no highs in my life, and I felt detached. I started thinking it wouldn’t be such a bad thing if I wasn’t around anymore. I finally got treatment when I started struggling with anxiety. I decided to tell my counselor what I’d been feeling. She looked at me and said, “you’re depressed.” I looked back at her and said, “you’re right.” It was a revelation. I had convinced myself that the way I felt was just what happened as you got older. Everyone, and I mean everyone, was really shocked when I told them. It took months of counseling, along with medication, to start to feel like myself again. My emotions are normal now. I feel the normal ups and downs of life. If I feel I might have a problem, I have a session with my counselor to put it into perspective. If you are struggling, please, please get help. You may feel that the world is better off without you, but you have people who would strongly disagree. You can get through this. I’m rooting for you.
Unfortunately too many ppl fall through the cracks. I have good insurance through my husband work and we “make too much “ to qualify for assistance so I can’t afford therapy only meds. Too many ppl need quality help.
Yes that’s me. I put my ‘happy’ mask on every time I go to work, grocery shopping, talking with friends etc. I always feel mentally exhausted at the end of the day because I have to put so much energy into looking and acting normal. It’s been with me since my 20’s and now, many years later it’s getting harder and harder to pretend I feel ok.
That's my everyday, every moment and every time I see anyone... It's soo physically and emotionally exhausting... I literally hurt at the end of the day.
I've had Major Depressive Disorder since I was 14. I learned with time that I don't have to hide myself just to seem like I'm okay. And I don't have to seek the approval of other people. I don't fake smile anymore . If I don't feel happy, I don't hide it. If someone really cares about me, they will ask me "How I am feeling" and actually listen to me like they mean it.
I know right? It’s getting so bad that I’m beginning to think my brain is automatically taking these examples and temporarily tailoring my personality to them...
@@thebutterscotchkid2481 hey but dont worry, that voyce is not your truly voice, you are always loved, look your brain like something "appart" from you, thanks for exist, how you doing btw????
I'm sorry but I disagree. I do not believe that "something wrong with" you. Other people think that it is wrong, but it is something that is a normal part of your life. What is wrong is how others view your depression as "wrong." It is what is different about you. It is something that does need addressing but it isn't "wrong."
Action: One day you decide to open up to someone you're close to. Response: "You're fine. Quit focusing on negative thoughts." Your Reaction: Resolve to carry on and show no weakness. Relatable?
I’ve destroyed every good job I had calling in sick for seemingly no reason other than I can not face the day! Every time I try to talk to my mom about it, she just tells me I need to change my mindset and be more positive. This channel has really helped me feel like I’m not alone on this planet!
There are things you can do to buff your mental health. And I guess that's kind of why you watch this channel. The easiest way is to eat something, particularly whatever kind of nutrition you're lacking. It's also totally fine to take a nap. And if you really having a bed day the best thing you can do is to do the things you find most fun.
No it's too late now... I was just informed that my senior who I always have a respect for him and we studied in the same class (Anatomy class. He was in the same major as me) He did a suicide this morning while I had an exam....(We're in the middle of final exams right now) He jumped off the building. He had depression. My heart is broken when I knew this news.... I just wish someone would see and go to help him before he did it. But unfortunately it didn't. Thank you for making this video. Your video is going to help lots of people who are suffering from this disease ... 😔😢 Sorry for my English.
hello! That must've been hard news! I'm so sorry you have to go through that and that senior had to go through so much. I'm supporting you and thank you for being brave and sharing that! Again I'm sorry you had to go through that, and I hope that boy goes off to heaven. May God protect him and take him to a good place!
@@sawsansalem5681 yes, it's really hard. Some of my friends couldn't even focus on the exam in the afternoon part. Yes, he'd been through so much. He can rest now in the place that he'll be happy and I hope so. So he won't be tried anymore... Thank you so much 🥺🙏
Sorry for your loss. :'( Its so hard for guys to speak up about their emotions. I hope your school will raise an awareness in his memory. May he rest in peace.
@@Violet.star40 I feel for you. I have lost too many in my life to suicide. I don't like counting it out anymore. The first person I lost too this was my brother. You and everybody who loves this person; please remember that love never dies. That is how they get to live, only through love. They don't have to live through the pain that brought them to that ending ever again. They love you and they feel the love you have for them. It's not easy on the ones who have to live afterwards. Life isn't about being easy, we can't even be fully ready for the next event. Life is about living, you and all who cared for this person will move forward with them and bring them in your hearts forever. Please know that love exists. It exist in you. Edit: Love exists in life. Life exists because of you.
Looking back on my 20’s, I realise I had depression, which resulted in chronic fatigue and brain fog as well as feeling an overwhelming sadness. I’m now amazed at the sheer willpower it must have taken for me to get me out of bed, onto the bus and into an 8 hour office job and back home. No wonder I felt totally physically and mentally broken every weekend, and would be off sick every month. I wish I would have sought help, rather than assuming ‘that’s just how difficult life is. I’m obviously just crap at it.’
Totally true, even when i was a child, i don't remember to ever be "happy" i always felt alone and isolate, i can only relate to others if I can make them laugh, or make them happy in anyway, if I see a cannot do that, i close in myselfe thinking about how useless i am.
The "getting help" part is difficult when people don't believe you and treat you like a drama queen or lazy, that's why I just isolate and stop talking to people
That is what I did for the last 10 years, too. And now I have more sever depression and no support because all my friends gave up on trying to reach out to me. ... and my family still says that depression is just lazyness... Mental Health should be part of basic education...
True that! Back then when i just got diagnosed with dysthymia, i heard my mom talking with my older brother how im just overreacting and being a drama queen
Me too. I hope you reach out to loved ones and speak to a professional. I use a mood-tracker app too (Daylio), it helps me be aware of little positive moments more, gives me that extra 5% happiness. Good luck!
@Tom I mean I‘m only 22 so sadly a decade feels like a lifetime to me. I can’t even imagine what 40 years more of this will feel like but that’s likely what future holds in store for me as well. And I agree, stoicism helps me too!
Theres.... There's an actual diagnosis for all this? I thought all this was just normal, since I've been told I'm either over exaggerating or I have a good home life, I shouldn't be complaining. I thought maybe it was just teenage hormones at the time too, as I've been told that as well, but it so far continued after as well.
You shoukd seek professional help either way. Hotmones can too alterate our mental status, but if this is influencing in your day to day functionallity, it is a good idea to seek help
The problem is that ther is no diagnosis of mental disbilities. You can try checking a DSM. But I have not oppened one for a decade, so I can't suggest where to look. One problem, though, is that by knowing the diagnosis, one can learn to fake the symptoms.
I lost my dad 2 weeks ago. He was retired but extremely active around the house, volunteering, and with his hobbies. He was social and excited about plans for the future. His face was full of warm smiles. Then he left us with nothing but a note saying he loves us all and a phone call from the police. Everyone around him saw him as a rock they could rely on, someone who never faltered or failed to lend a hand to someone in need. I can't know for sure what he was dealing with, but I know for certainthat I wish he asked for help. If you are struggling inside and you're afraid of disappointing people by opening up, please *please* consider being honest with someone about how you're feeling. Even if you feel like you're strong enough to take care of it yourself, all it takes is one off day.
Hi Andrew, I am so sorry for your loss of your dear dad. I wish you and your family peace. Mental illness is still very much stigmatized......those fearful attitudes and lack of empathy is what is wrong with society and people who are suffering don't get the help they desperately need because of those negative attitudes about mental health and being afraid of "being found out" or judged. It's very very sad indeed. You have to be your own advocate and don't stop until you get the help you need.
Andrew, i am sorry for what happened and may your father rest in peace . It's high time I get help too... Thank u so much for the message down there in the end😭😭🫂 Sending love and light your way
same bro, i try to be the person laughing the most to appease people but each time i do so i immediately think back to whether or not i’m actually enjoying their company
For me starts as my "best face forward," then I typically end up enjoying myself...if it is indeed good company. Otherwise, I just quietly nonconfrontationally pull away.
This is so nice. I've actually been asked in therapy why they thought I needed it because I seemed to be functioning fine with good grades and a good social life... yet I often contemplate if I should go to class or not but drag myself anyway... I feel anxious and my mind blows up the things that might seem little to others to the point of freaking out or breaking down... or the fact I have trouble being alone sometimes because my thoughts spiral... even that simple question made me feel like a fake. That I shouldn't be there and be wasting their time. Why was I even there when my life was put together...
I feel the same.. it’s even easier to fake it with zoom classes. But sometimes i go but don’t listen at all, or go from my bed without camera because i have been crying or not sleeping. Then i go to the zoom reunion for the group project and smile like everything is fine..
Who are they to judge, are they trying to hold you back, have less expectations, or have worse cases to address... looking at the billing structure and ur on the top tier of function...IDK...🤔
Most days I can find something to be grateful for but I just wish people understood the energy deficit and how much effort it takes just to have a "normal" day. The inertia is sometimes overwhelming.
I usually don't say anything or to those who I trust more I just say "I could have done better" but when they start asking why I'm not proud of my work or sth like that I just change the subject. 😅
I'm usually like " oh it wasn't that hard" because I feel like I'm not that skilled and I wanna downplay my achievements as to avoid attention, but then I worry that I'm coming off as prideful :/
The explanation of a good day really got to me. That day sounded so relaxing and perfect and then the comparison that that is just a normal day to some people… wow man
I’ve been fired every time my work finds out I’m dealing with BP. It doesn’t matter if I’m the highest earner or the best trainer or a reliable employee. Mental illness frightens people because they only see the crazy people on tv who hurt other people and do stupid stuff. I just gave up trying to fit in and hiding my true self. It’s exhausting.
Summary: 1. We constanly feel like we're bluffingz even if we're not. 2:03 2. There is rarely obvious proof of our struggle and need for help 2:59 3. My good day might just be your normal everyday 3:50 4. Bad days are overwhelming and feel imposibble 4:41 5. Getting trough bad days requires amounts of energy, even more than usual 5:49 6. We frequently struggle to focus and we are nor ar the top of our game 6:38 7. Our average everyday means regular routibes can often feel like reforming an olympic tryout x2 in a row 7:22 8. We're not weak because we ask for or recieve help 8:56 Have a good life
I'm almost 61 and have struggled with depression since I was probably 11. I got really great at the facade of "just fine 🙂". I've been to multiple therapists throughout the years but this series has helped me not only understand myself better, but realize how far I've come from that traumatized child and constantly overwhelmed wife and mother. I've learned so much and continue to heal and grow to be more comfortable with who I am. I also suffered from high functioning anxiety and likely C-PTSD. I was never properly diagnosed so could never properly develop the correct and healthy coping mechanisms i needed. Thank you for being here and thank you for the help I've received from your videos.
No comment other than: relatable. I had a similar deal happen, diagnosed with depression twice a month by different therapists that were only around a week after. It sucks always throwing up that facade, one thing that could just be me, but I was always losing track of a conversation or memory. I can remember the most random little details and everything else just be blank, I'd always go off on random tangents and hop from one train of thought to another in a moments notice. And speaking of I just wrote a giant wall of text. Nice :)
This video helped me figure out what's going on with me, I thought I wasn't depressed because of being able to get up in the morning and go to school and I always felt like I might be attention seeking or victimizing myself and that I was probably exagerating. But I did identify with almost everything you said in this video and it gives me a little bit more peace of mind to know it's a real thing people can struggle with. Thank you
This is so accurate. Thank you for this. I’ve only reached out once and tried to tell someone how I was feeling but was met with silence and disbelief. And at the lowest points when googling ways to commit suicide you don’t have enough energy to ask for help.
Funny thing: when I was good at masking my depression, people did not believe I was depressed Now I have told some people and they basically give me this whole “surely not, you must be mistaken, just so this or that and it will go away” attitude The best one was the lady who told me: no, you’re not, you have talked yourself into it. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I mean.... maybe she’s right, it’s my own brain depressing me... Moral of story: there are some people who will simply not believe depression is a real thing. It should not matter what they think, but sadly it does, because of how you will be treated by these people.
I hurt my knee in 7th grade and right before 8th grade ended (it was still hurt) my dad said that my mind was purposely making me think it was hurt. I know thats not the case i know why it was hurt, but the fact he said that pissed me off.
I'm a bit scarred to tell my mom about my depression just based on her reaction to me telling her about my adhd. She's almost convinced I'm just scaring myself with what I read. I brought up imposters syndrome the other day because I thought it was interesting for a character I'm gonna write, and she suspiciously asked why I was looking into that. 🤐 No reason, mom, just for a book...
@@zoe_dawg it’s okay. Hirsutism is a medical condition where girls grow excessive hair(especially in their faces,chins,under the jaw etc.) due to an increased level of androgens. It’s more common in girls with PCOS.
It hurts when everytime i talk about how I feel, they always say that they've already been there. And that they overcame it easily. And I should do the same to. Those things doesn't help. You're basically saying that you can do it on your own and you don't need help. Or we are just taking it so hard. We are just drama queens. We just want someone who will stay, no matter how hard it is to be with us. Someone who will listen, and think a solution together with us. That's all.
And the best thing: When you are already struggeling and then get PMS on top and you are sitting on your desk at work, the Tears half high in your Eyes, fighting with every inch to not burst out in tears (becaus your life just feels like hell ... but it's not) and someone is asking you: "Are you alright?!" and don't undestands why you are waving them away, so you can just keep your composure ... Hormones suck sometimes.
I thought I was crazy and just an idiot and lazy someone who struggled to wake up because I’m “lazy” but.. this video helped me understand there is a bigger problem.
As someone with high functioning depression, this was really accurate. The burden of HFD is heavy, always having to put on a happy face and pretending everything is okay, when in reality all I want to do is curl up in my bed, cry, go to sleep, and never wake up. It feels like everyone is against you because “you don’t look depressed” or “but you’re productive” or “eh, teenagers” are very common responses I get when I open up to people I don’t completely %100 trust
Holy crap, I actually started tearing up watching this. I’ve been unemployed for 2 years bc how miserable life just always felt no matter how hard I tried. I was able to hold a job and would go rock climbing and workout all the time had friends had no problem with girls but was NEVER happy and always felt drained. I have a habit of just quitting my jobs for “being too much” and just leaving, I think I need to go see a therapist again and specifically so them to treat me for PDD bc they always say I have depression but never do anything to help me
Sending love and support all the way from the middle east! I hope your managing. here is my email if you DESIRE to talk to someone (I'm not a therapist) Just want to show that you're not alone! super246484@gmail.com
I started bullet journaling. Once I had my schedule, health, and feelings on paper it became clear why I felt I was on the verge of a break down. I was able to start seeing patterns I needed to change and problems I didn't know were problems. Like when I see a unhealthy pattern, I look up and ask how I can change it. When I see a lack of something good I want, I do the same to add it in my life. I've still got a long way to go but now I have some type of guide to do better.
I mean this is all common stuff really everybody feels this from time to time just know that there’s billions of people who feel exactly the way you do
@@usernamehere2411 The big difference lies in the fact that “normal” people feel like this on and off every once in a while. Those of us who suffer with this have it for long periods. In fact, if you feel like this for three months on end, that’s when you can call it depression. That’s when it stops being “I’m depressed” and it becomes “I have depression” I dunno how they came with the three month period, but this is what I was told when I was diagnosed by experts. “Normal” people have no clue what it is when it just drags on and on. They have the feeling of “this too shall pass”. And yes, I call them normal, because suffering from depression is not the norm for humans. It’s not how we are supposed to be.
@@usernamehere2411 I’m sorry, but when you call this common stuff that everybody feels from time to time.... you remind me of those people who don’t get it. Who trivialize it. Who, at first sympathize, but then when, in their eyes, your issues are taking to long to resolve, they lose patience and start telling you things like: get over it, you’re just doing this for attention, I got over it, why can’t you. Everybody gets sad or depressed Not everyone suffers from depression. Two VERY different things
Struggling to get out of bed everyday makes me feel like a failure before the day has even begun. As for reaching out for help, in the U.K. that’s virtually impossible to get beyond more medication which robs you of the remaining energy you might have. Well that’s my experience in any case.
I am in Germany and it's a bit the same thing , I rightfully or not think demanding drugs may just silence the problem but I side kill me more. As I already take a lot of drugs because of a bad stroke depression life maybe got me into I am a little sceptic. Also I agree on everything in this video, and am at the point where I do see I need outside help also.
Honestly, I just manage this with compartmentalizing everything, both good and bad emotions, and procrastinating with meaningless pleasures until my mind has a semblance of order
The hardest thing about being high functioning, for me in my experience, is that everyone didn't believe I needed as much help as I did. Still, I think I have to prove that my disorder is Serious to get support. But, even I wouldn't accept my diagnosis for the longest time and was my own worst enemy. It was a self defeating cycle. I lost the confidence of a lot of my family who didn't understand the clinical aspects. And the professionals couldn't force me to take their advice and sometimes wouldn't be straight with me bcz they thought I wasn't going to listen, anyway. Things are much better after nearly 20 years of learning what I needed and how to work with professionals and be my own advocate with them and my family and friends. Now I want to go back to being a productive member of society with the added benefit of knowing a lot more about myself and maybe helping other people who have problems or know someone who does. Cheers
I was diagnosed for cyclothymia almost 15 years ago and about 4 years ago with dysthymia and still most of the time I believe deeply that I am just a fake. Maybe I really am. That to the point you made of not accepting the diagnose. I am happy that you are better now and I hope its only going to get better for you.
@@vincentfreeman4987 hang in there. improvement usually comes slowly and frequently people closest to you notice how you've changed even better you do. Here's a couple things that are/were really hard to accept, but are useful - you are worthy of Love and Life, Love yourself, take care of yourself with lifestyle changes and self-care, don't engage with negative people, anywhere, smile and nod or change the channel, keep searching for the best support care people, they're out there. Consider getting a dog. You have to take them out at least twice a day and even if you can't care for (take care of) yourself it's easy to care for (Love) a dog because they don't judge. Use your judgement, not mine, don't over think it but don't be rash on your decision for that one 🤓👍💪🤗🤗🤗🤝🙏🙏
Dysthymia/PDD is the diagnosis I've been given when my depression had lasted for 10 years. It's now been 12 and I still feel completely misunderstood by some of the people around me...
honestly 😭😭 i was so drained after school or my jobs and felt like an ass cause i didn’t want to interact anymore w family or my bf afterwards and i thought it was a me thing.
I absolutely resonate with this film. I have Dysthymia along with many other Mental struggles. I was relived that you could put into words the things that I have been trying for years to get others to understand. This includes my surviving parent My Daddy. If it were not for your films giving me the courage to even attempt yet again to explain these things in a way that "Most Normal" people can even conceptualize before we even think about trying for an understanding. For that and these videos I thank you so ever much!!!! I struggle with my mind like it is a raging waterfall that feeds into itself. Each drop is yet another instance, memory, filter that was put into place by either conditioning environmental interactions or from the decades of self therapy, I love how you described the relentless assault we have no real control over that goes on in our head. To me it is like watching a war rage around you as you fight it and being not only the witness but also the narrator too. I have a Phrase called your needle is stuck, and this references that loop like instance when a vinyl record has a scratch and the needle that tracks the music to play. it skips and also repeats and may even get Stuck going over the same moment over a thousand times in my mid. I can loose hours lost in thought. I am aware of everything, but sometimes my ability to even care (even though I want to) usually is too exhausting. Like I told my dad that what I show and do for others is what I need the most back from them. In this sense I mean this: If I went through the massive effort to even just tell you or express to you something that is bothering me, that I would like some help with, or that I may even admit that I just can't seem to get through something; Then PLEASE FOR THE LIFE"S SAKE TAKE ME SERIOUSLY! just because I am not outwardly showing the painful chaos I may be going threw ALL THE TIME, Does not in any way shape or form Diminish the importance or absolute necessity I have for having even asked. I constantly remind myself that things are different for every single one of us. That we ALL have that one special thing called FREE WILL. So, is it right of me to put these problems on another's shoulders when they could be going through their own struggles? When I just as easily get blown off, told just let it roll off your shoulders, don't worry about it, That is just how they are, ect I feel even more guilty and horrible for even having confided in that person in the first place. Struggling each day while constantly actively being legitimately treated as tho I and my existence does not matter to these individuals. Yet, at the same time constantly reminded of just how little they care while spreading lies and comments that only push me further into despair. I can choose to say something like my mind screams at me to do, Because it KNOWS that what is going on is WRONG in so many ways, but I continue to suppress myself out of self preservation. In the Lies of Hope that I may be able to escape from this hell one day. Only to realize that I will never be free or taken seriously Regardless of all the work, time, energy, effort, struggles, ect That I argue with myself every minute about weather my existence is even really wanted besides what OTHERS want, need, or demand out of me. While at the same time NEVER ONCE RECIPROCATING that consideration, kindness, or effort back when it comes down to taking that HUGE step and asking for help. How to help I may not know, but My screams for help only land on deff ears. Sometimes it could be the simplest thing like ACKGNOWLAGING that I need the most. Or even a simple Please or thank you or omg that you appreciate my efforts or attempts of something. Then their is the biggest issue of all. People treat my High functioning (only out of years of recognative thinking and mental training with my filters) mental problems as nothing but a lie, an excuses or even as a way for me to get attention. I should be just fine by their standards. I am over thinking things, over reacting, over complicating things, I should be able to just move on, push threw it every single moment of my life. Like MY problems and issues are less impactful or important as something they can see just how harmful and horrible that is a PHYSICAL issue. Like my mental disabling issues are just something I make up to get things out of people. That even if I know that I will NEVER amount to anything but crap in their eyes over the absolute best possible potential is so readily possible for those that have a Physical limitation... Please PM me and let me know your thoughts BESIDES getting out of that kind of environment, I would have if I could have already. Thank you to all the wonderful team and All other Life management peoples, and those most special That do send me a PM on face book or reply to this. Thank you! Also I am sorry for the lengthy response. Even if it is 2 years old video. I still appreciate it just the same.
I think the worst thing about depression is that everyone can see what it does to you and how you struggle to survive and yet they seem to be completely clueless (by choice?) as to what's causing the struggles. I guess it's easier to call you lazy or tell you that you need to force yourself to get up and do things rather than acknowledge that you have a serious problem. I went to a counselor for a while and he told me that the people who had the least sympathy and understanding for others suffering from depression were family members who were also suffering from depression. He said they almost always labeled the other family members as lazy and worthless rather than entertain the idea that they too might be suffering from depression. He had the unique perspective of someone who was treating both family members without either of them knowing he was treating the other. It's hard to believe the stigma of mental health issues is still alive and well in our so called enlightened world today.
2:59 This reminded me when I told to my grandma that one night I started crying and couldn't stop, and that my cat tried to comfort me. Instead of asking me "are you ok? You need help?" she told me that I had no reason to cry because I live in a beauty house and I have food. It really hurts.
Sending love and support! I hope your managing. Here is my email if you DESIRE to talk to someone (I'm not a therapist) Just want to show that you're not alone, you don't have to trust me! Just a random stranger checking up on you! You can comment, whatever makes you comfortable! super246484@gmail.com
"If your live is so perfect why are you sad" is obviously not the best response but I think she just wantet to show you how great your live is from her perspective.
@@cinemaatrium3863 Yeah, I know she was trying to make me feel better. But the other day my grandfather (not her husband) died because of an illnes, and she told me to not cry because she would cry too. I know that she's doing her best, and I love her, but it hurts.
I know. Responses like this makes me think about answers like "who told you I don't have food, beautiful house, youth, all my life ahead to create things etc. 🙄 I'm telling you I don't want to."
This is pretty accurate. Even when you are diagnosed with high functioning depression, you will lie to yourself and think it will go away with time. This condition can distort your perception on reality. Especially when the wracking sadness happens. It takes slot out of you and you wonder why you are so weak compared to everyone else. You start to think you can’t do any better and you keep getting fired from crappy jobs. Your tolerance for emotional abuse is much lower. To the point where you cannot have close relationships. Good ones always fall apart, either by your doing, or theirs. Your sense of competence is much lower and you are likely to slowly die inside. Not being dramatic, just saying how it can be. Medication can help, but you may experience emotional blunting.
Ah yes, because I keep up with everything and more, and still be depressed. It really sucks because other people just dismiss our words because we seem "okay".
This literally made me cry because of how true it is. I literally got diagnosed and my parents didn’t change anything with what they say; stuff like like you’re lazy, it’s not the end of the world, you’re always sad!, why do you sleep so much, you’re so ungrateful, and other things like that.
Oh. Do share. I’m on a waiting list to get assessed for ADHD. And have been getting therapy for depression for 2 years now but I’m starting to find it unhelpful and just meh. I think ADHD might be the real issue causing the HFD and all. Now I’ve gotten a bit better at letting people know I’m struggling and need help, but honestly I probably look competent and fine and happy to everyone unless they’re one of the few I have specifically spoken to and cried in front of. And it’s all so exhausting too, making those efforts to let people know, on top of already just working so hard to (almost) cope with everyday life. And I am constantly struggling near the crumpling point, which I now know can really happen, because it already has. But I am thankful that I at least have these people around that I trust are on my side and will not actively try to use what I tell against me. Btw do you follow the channel HowToADHD? I highly recommend it. Best content ever and place to find solidarity and encouragement for someone with ADHD.
Depression certainly isn't easy. I'm not the only one in my family who has been diagnosed with depression. Both my father and I suffer from it and have continously felt invalidated by my mother from her saying things like, "It's all in your head." "You're fine." "Stop feeling that way." And "It's just a phase." It hurts to hear things like that from the people you care about. It's even worse when someone you think should understand what you're going through or feeling makes you feel invalidated saying things like, "You have it easy." "I've gone through worse." And "Nothing should make you feel the way you do." That invalidation can make you feel empty inside and like you can never be heard. You stop trusting people with your emotions so you shut people out. When my emotions get to high I try to shut down until someone pushes too far then I tend to explode and release all those emotions which results in me feeling horrible and ashamed afterwards. I push myself everyday to get out of bed, force my emotions aside, take my medications, to interact with people, and to go to work everyday. I find myself thinking, "I shouldn't be feeling this way." And "It's not normal." But I feel like I'm stuck in a loop with no way out. I'm sure alot of other people could feel the same. I keep telling myself that others out there suffer with worse and I have no right to feel the way I do. Not only do the people I care about invalidate how I feel, but I also end up doing it to myself. Neither of my parents could ever be my emotional support because of how emotionally absent they are so I don't tell them that I'm struggling or suffering. It's a vicious cycle that I don't want anyone else to suffer from, so when it comes to other people I let them lean on me and I listen to everything they say and try to help them. No matter how bad my depression or anxiety get I mask it well with my empathy. I want to be someone that others can reach out to but I also want to be able to reach out to someone without being afraid of how they will react to me trying and failing to express what's going on. I know I shouldn't unload this into the comment section of a video but this channel strikes a cord with me and so do alot of the other comments. I wish everyone the best and I hope they can find someone to confide in and walk beside.
sounds terrifyingly familiar 😞 It has been over two years since you posted your comment, so if it's okay I hope you'll indulge me 😇 because I'm honestly really curious and I would love to know how you're doing these days? If I may ask, of course 😊
@@TheBauwssss I have a son now with someone I love very much who understands me. I still go through ups and downs as well as I still try to tear myself down but the one I love helps me through it. When I wrote this comment I think I was still living up north now I live down south. Life is slowly getting better and I'm going to make sure my son never experiences what I did or feels how I did growing up. My comment sounds all too familiar to many people especially since most people treat mental illnesses as if they don't exist.
I'm almost certain that I have this. I hate being a burden on people, so I hide my pain (which is also physical. I've had constant back pain for about 5 years now and having to work a normal job with it is excruciating and impacts my mental health as well). There are literally points where one form of pain becomes so overwhelming that I can no longer hide either, and I have found a quiet place at work, dropped to the floor to lie on my back, and essentially broke down in physical and mental anguish for 10-15 minutes just to give me enough respite to pick myself up and carry on. Fortunately no one has ever found me like this, so the mask holds for now.
This is me. And as someone who is studying to becoming a doctor, means that it's even harder for me to function in a high stress environment. I've mentally collapsed more times than I can count. The exhaustion this video explains for persons couldn't be more accurate. Dear Lord it's too much. Thank you so much for this video.
I know I’m late, but it might be a good idea to consider other career paths that are lower stress. For me personally, school was very stressful. I felt I couldn’t drop down to a regular class (perhaps you feel the same pressure to become a doctor) but when I finally did, I felt and feel better. It’s not perfect, my depression is not gone, but I no longer feel like I’m on the verge of death and can at least get through my days. I even have a few smiles again like I did years ago, and it doesn’t feel like I’m always faking being normal/happy/my entire personality
@@flitefulwantssubs402 thanks for your reply. I completed medical school and I'm looking into specialties that have lower stress levels or seeing if there are ways to get into hospital administration that have also have more predictable hours and lower stress levels just for a healthier state of mind.
Someone that has high-functioning depression usually turns to drugs and alcohol or some other addiction. Just to escape the reality of being depressed... it really sucks!!
Yeah it's really really hard to give up smoking, alcohol and other drugs after requiring them all along to attempt to cope with your adult life. But it's worth it. 4 years clean now and I'm starting to really take control of my mental health. It's good shedding all the facades, and it gave me the chance to really give a chance for meds to work and give objective opinion if antidepressants needed to be adjusted/ changed.
What I feel is that if I talk about it to someone, I would look like I'm crying for attention which is something that keeps me from opening up. Edit- I'm actually fine and not crying for help.
Sending love and support all the way from the middle east! I hope your managing. Here is my email if you DESIRE to talk to someone (I'm not a therapist) Just want to show that you're not alone, you don't have to trust me! Just a random stranger checking up on you! super246484@gmail.com
@@sawsansalem5681 That's really sweet of you that you want to help everyone. Thank you for that! But I have a question for you. Are you doing alright yourself? I kinda feel like that you're also struggling yourself, but still wanting to help others.
@@kadrikapa5855 Hello Hunny, Thanks for your concern! I really just feel like I was blessed with people to talk with and I'm trying to help as much as people as I can because everyone deserves that! It's devastating to think of everyone struggling alone! I'm fine though just caught up with a lot! Thank you so much. What about you, how are you? want to talk about anything? Thank you so much you honestly made my day.
That's exactly how I feel. I want to come out as bi-curious, but with my sister having come out as a lesbian and my parents not believing what I say 90% of the time, I'm scared they'll just think I'm wanting attention. I suppose that's how I've come out, I guess. XD
I’ve been going to therapy on and off for such a long time because I wanted to have a better life. I just can’t think of a time in my life when I was happy but all the psychologists I saw told me I was not depressed, I was just sad. Recently I found a new therapists and she told me I might have dysthymia. We’re still not sure if I have it or not (we’ve had only two sessions so far) but it feels good to not have my feelings dismissed and to have a name for what’s going on with me. That way I feel like I can fight it
I remember myself sitting in a session (during my low-ish phase) and the therapist asking me a simple question - what are you looking forward to? I remember myself just sitting there and unable to figure out a single thing - while getting through a divorce, damn pandemic and stuff (luckily still able to work...). It quite caught me off guard. For me it's often even difficult just to recognize and admit that I'm in my lows - I struggle with this for years, I have better times, worse times, the worst is that it mostly seems out of my control. But so far I figured out that there is one thing that sends me in my lows - when I have too much of "unfinished business" - I don't know how to say it better in English (not a native speaker). It means that there are too many things I haven't solved in my life - and it may be just little things like fixing something broken at home - but when there are just too many of them, I get too overwhelmed, it simply occupies my mind too much. And it helps me to take care of these things, slowly, one by one, and this can make a tremendous change that I really start feeling better and in control of my life. I don't know if this is in any way applicable to you, everyone is different, but I wanted to show you that the "recipe" for you could be out there somewhere waiting for you to be discovered and that it's possible to find it - and wish you luck with your fight! 🤗
I personally have the issue of when a bad day hits I truly fear what I could do I don’t know if anyone else has this problem but I call them depression attacks, does anyone have this problem? If so what do you do to stay safe?
@@Psych2go One time my older sister thought your channel was bad because she walked in on me while I happened to be watching a video about toxic parents. She told me that my parents aren't toxic and demanded I change the video. My parents really aren't toxic irl. My sister just decided to punish me for curiosity.
I only recently discovered this channel and I gotta say, I'm tearing up at this video because it's like my feelings finally have words. I've been having problems with this for a few years, and my relationship with my gf has suffered for it to the point where it might end in a few months if things don't change.
I've written and erased this at least five times. Even though this post is younger than an hour. (Well more now since I started writing this comment...) This is a good example of my daily. I also struggle with Complex PTSD. Anyway thank you! Oh and I signed up for the mag
Additional Edit: I also lost my father this year, it was very unexpected. The day it happened I was already feeling like your slightly bad day was worse than losing the one man who loved me because I didn't want to take away from what others were living through. Also because I still ran at base line, I thought I was in a good place. But was so happy when I did barely above base. I really needed somebody to drive everybody else home. (Everybody who was venting to me about their emotions; when it was about my dad and how they felt bad, or they just had something going on personally. I couldn't be a soundboard anymore.) I just wanted to rest. So I could figure out me, so I could access my pain. I needed help and support. However I didn't know how to ask well enough to the right friends and asked the wrong person to help. Not that person's fault they just never had the tools. They may have never had that loss of life and they can't support without experience. They also couldn't support me though this because they literally couldn't grasp the reach of this kind of depression. In the last few months I keep up with my professional help and have better people around who have the tools to support me as well. I am lucky to have a good support network that is as able as possible to see my daily struggle and love me though it all. It is still a struggle and sometimes I wonder if I can make it. The help I have are still not used to me asking for help. They are used to me being strong for everyone. That's why I work on my mental health so I can still share and help someone else. We don't need to feel alone. When no one is there; I realize being here by myself, isn't being alone. Being here is being me, and I love me and I know how to take care. I can always love me, which means I will always love. I believe we all Love forever! Remember to love the ones who seem like they can take it all, they may need you to see them more clearly. They may need someone to drive everyone one else home for them.
@@ibcheel9021 I am happy that you are doing a very good job by seeking professional help. Not everyone is as strong as you, I swear. Plus you are a really nice and kind person, you still want to help other people. You have been doing amazing stuff, keep up the good work . Cheers!
Do you know what symptoms led to your C-PTSD diagnosis on top of PDD? (If I might ask!) I was diagnosed with PDD but I feel like I might have C-PSTD as well (but I'm not sure if my therapist knows about it).
@@Surfergirl0711TRIGGER WARNING! Stop reading if you need! This is long, and you may want to consider if this might trigger you. I was diagnosed with C-PTSD as a child. I was raped as a child for around two years or more. Ages 4 - 6. This happened with close trusted family (who also raped my brother in front as punishment for me fighting back) and then later around the age of 7, with highschool football players who lived in my neighborhood. (Nobody was ever charged because I lived in a very Mormon community who convinced my mom that I would be ruining those boys futures because those football players already had scholarships to BYU. Nobody being charged messed me up more.) The high functioning depression came from a mix of that and following years of losing people around me. My brother killed himself when I was 11, only month after I failed my 3rd attempt. I am now 36 and have gone through so many close deaths, from suicide, to overdose, to illness, to sudden deaths. I unfortunately haven't always had the best cards given to me. I went though intense therapy as a child, and was treated pretty well. I was in this therapy from the age of 7 until 14, when we just didn't have the money for my therapist. I would also maintain therapy in anyway I could during my years as a teenager. I would read many books about my condition, talk to support lines, even my school counselor and I knew I wasn't alone. I have as an adult maintained therapy. The High Functioning Depression comes from the mix of my abuse (having to hide it all the time) to having to be the support for the many personal deaths I've experienced. I am listed as high functioning because even when a new death happens (such as my father's sudden passing) I can/will still maintain. This comes from my internal struggles. I don't lay down and let life roll me over. Even if there are times when I should. I just don't know how to rely on others. Always with all of the work I do it's hard to trust. I just feel like I'm the only one who can let myself down. That way nobody else will have that control and be able to let me down. So to try to make this shorter. My HFD comes from needing some kind of control. It is directly tied to my experiences of C-PTSD, as I have always had to "maintain" or else... Remember mental health takes work. You need to know the "job" you have to stay focused on and also keep your tools sharp, and also keep your eyes open for new tools.
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Hi :)
Hi.
❤️
Yess I will😊💗
Can you a make a video on how to stay calm because I always get so stressed out whenever I hear something that upsets I started panicking my head hurts and I always feel like crying 😟
"People don't fake being depressed. They fake being happy." --- Robin Williams
So true❤
RIP Robin Williams. Depression can be quite the silent killer. 😔
@@hellsdementedsong5563 Exactly: people fake being happy. That’s so true.
A very vert wise thing to say.❤
Oh my... if that isnt foreshadowing and cryptic as ishh😮😢
I feel like high functioning depression is like getting used to depression, making it a normal of your life. Like “I am breathing and the depression inside me sucks up all of my energy secretly and I live that way.”
Sounds abut right, it feels like that old friend you know you shouldn't spend time with because it always ends up backfiring in some way.
I honestly just thought everybody secretly hates life. Because surely they do!? I mean what is there to like about it? I'm pretty old now and after a lifetime of feeling that way there doesn't appear to be any improvement of way out so... Surely everybody battles to start the day.
It’s like I’ve lived this way for so long that depression is my normal, but it’s ok because it doesn’t really hurt I’m just comfortably numb or something most days
@@witr.7241 That is a terrifyingly accurate description of what I couldnt put into words yet, when describing what I have.
@@tiyangina3571 like I’m just not suicidal or anything but like I’m just super nihilistic
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Albert Camus
Thank you Jay
I love Albert Camus his books are *chefs kiss
🖤
Since when is anyone normal?
@Arcane Raven ah ok. it's just literally no one is normal.
When someone says "you don't seem depressed".
Me: Yeah, that's the point. I'm intentionally attempting to avoid being constantly questioned by everyone about it.
yep. I don't want to bring other people down. And really don't want to talk about it.
Brad Starnes.
Absolutely, but it's extremely hard work, which often leaves you totally exhausted.
Yes indeed
Pretty much
"I'm just tired" was my go-to answer when someone managed to sneak a look behind my mask, it was such an acceptable answer that people just shrugged and moved on.
This is a very astute description of how it feels. Energetic people don't seem to get it. You feel like you're working against yourself, fighting a battle...everyday.
Exactly
Life becomes a downhill struggle.
Reaching out feels like including others in the fatal vortex.Too sick to pray.Too sad to be useful to anyone or for anything.
" Among the voices voiceless that throng your hiddenness".
Yes.
Exactly. If something I’ve been ruminating on sucks energy out of me I need to force myself to do something completely unrelated and lose myself in it in order to overcome those negative feelings. The problem is, the thing that I am avoiding is something that I need to accomplish while what I did accomplish is probably not as important.
Like drowning in air.... and, we def shd win an Oscar for "best actress"..
The most beautiful thing my friend said to me once, when I couldn't get out of bed, was: "Don't worry, you'll be able to get up sooner or later, no matter how long it takes, I'll be waiting for you" 🌻
Wow thats a great friend!
@@JKVow
We take care of and support each other 💓
Never let your friend go. They are a gem!
@@shreetamaghosh379
Never, I love my girl. She knows that in days like that I'm trying my best to get back to her 😊
Tesla referenced human energy 🌪👻jesus christ referenced living waters science described water memory 🌊👨🎓existence reflecting psychologically psalms16:24 k,j 👻💎🤍👨🎓💖🌪
The worst thing about having depression is that everyone expects you to act like you don't
Exactly, I refused to hide my depression when I was working, and I kept getting told things like " smile and get over yourself." Which made it worse. There was also much worse said to me and due to the bullying I now have such bad social anxiety that I can't work or even leave the house.
@@crystald3655 I am so sorry that people treated you so badly. It can get better with support. I hope you have people in your life that can help
@Anime/Rock&Metalfan basically. I just watched it before I made that comment
I remember being on shifts and once in a while I’d ask to sit down for 5mins and have a glass of water as my depression or anxiety was getting really bad and i needed a breather. Was constantly told to work through it or had eyes rolled at me “didn’t you take your tablets today”. And then 5minutes later someone would ask for a smoke break and take 15minutes out of work which is fine and no questions asked.
Act normal don’t walk around sad nobody wants to be around that ok bet I’ll just take myself away
I wish people would understand it’s not a choice to be depressed,
And I can’t talk myself out of it.
And no being around people DOESNT “cheer me up”
Good God no....I just want my safe home . Not people
Being around people just leads to hiding it until you finally alone again
For me my energy levels do go up around other people. That is, people I like and around whom I feel comfortable. As soon as I'm home, even with my daughter there, I slump right back into what I call my funk.
If a person whose leg is broken is lying or sitting on the ground you don't say, "Pick yourself up!", you help them up or get help from someone who knows the best way to assist. Maybe this analogy will help people who don't know depression understand.
i agree with you
Common things people who don't know HFD say:
"You have a good home life, you aren't depressed."
Exactly
All the people I have asked them for help say that
@@melo_maniac9983 i know.. but its just a lie we tell ourselves when all hope is lost... bcs no one would understand and we desperately want to feel better.
It makes me feel so guilty because I have an ok home life but I'm just hiding from my parents how I actually feel..
Imposter syndrome be like: fake tasks and survive from the crewmates
"if I talked to my friends the way I talk to myself I would have no friends" A profound quote for those who suffer from ruminating/depression
That one cut pretty deep.
This is why you have to change your focus. I get this very well. But I never say, "I hate myself" anymore. I say "I hate my life." It sounds trivial but there is a difference. Concentrating hatred on yourself is destructive, but focusing on your life, can change things for the better.
I struggle with this. Where I live, it's considered required by much of society to be intolerant of any signs of depression in oneself or others. It's been so bad sometimes, where people will shout in your face or harm you, or even ignore your basic needs, that you feel like all you want is to break them utterly... So they'll eventually learn that their ignorance is what causes depression.
The worst part is that, sometimes we become the monster that leads ourselves and others deeper into darkness.
I have substance abuse issues. I was able to hide it for many years. No one could tell until I came clean about it. I would presume that depressed relate.
@@SkoopyghostTrue; but like with substance abuse, sometimes two people with the same problem can be dangerous for each other. For example, if they handle their substance abuse or depression differently. Perhaps one might be high-functioning, while the other is not. This can cause either one to lash out at the other, for various reasons.
Sometimes I've been cruel to people with chronic depression/anxiety, even though I've had it for most of my life... Opening up to others who might be like yourself, can be extremely difficult, and even traumatic. If you live in a community that doesn't tolerate signs of depression, some of those with depression will become intolerant of others with depression.
It's a vicious cycle, but one that can be remedied if we're merciful with each other, and ourselves.
I hate this feeling when I really cannot concentrate on anything or just get my work done ,but people just think I'm lazy
while I am struggling with my anxiety, this video says something that I wish people could understand 😔
glad im not alone 😔✊🏼💕
I really understand what you are feeling and you are not alone in this 🧡
You are not alone but I think I am lucky cause I have 3 friends they understand me
Really need an understanding person
I feel this on another level.
I hate when I’m having a “good” day and something small immediately makes it into a bad one, such small things can cause me to break so easily even if I was successful and okay just before.
So true. I feel like every time I have the rare experience of feeling good or if something good happens, I end up falling into a deep, black pit of despair. It’s like I get punished for having good experiences.
I know that I'm sailing close to the wind when little things have me losing my temper.
Oh gosh, yes. For me, it even doesn't have to be a bad thing that's directed at me specifically. Could be just watching the news while eating dinner with family - or just reading hate/negativity on social media.
God, yes, this!
Yes this happens so often that when I get home from school I'm just waiting for something to go wrong if I had a good or sometimes ok day
We’re just not “high-functioning,” we’re just really good at hiding our feelings.
We should all get oscars for those fake smiles and the “I’m fine, and how are you?”s we keep dishing out day in day out.
Even from ourselves.
Yep. I told my mom about being depressed, she said she’s get me a therapist. Fast forward a year with no therapist, I was even worse. More depressed, anxious, suicidal. I told my dad and he said he’d get me help. Luckily he did, but when I asked him why my mom didn’t get me one when I first told her, he said “we thought you’d gotten better”. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I had just gotten better at pretending. Seriously, pretending to be happy has just become second nature to me
Disorder-waiving?
We all should be politicians
I've had a psychiatrist tell me to my face "You look fine." The invalidation I've received from mental health professionals makes me shudder every time I go to make an appointment. My mask is freaking amazing until I take it off or a hole gets poked in it.
That's also one of the things that scare me the most and prevent me from getting an appointment. The other thing is feeling like I'm wasting their time
I’ve only had 1 good therapist. One. Most are full of it.
I really get that. My psychiatrist told me, in spanish, something that could be translated to 'I think you're more confused than depressed'. The word he used was 'liada'. I felt really invalidated.
Your mask is amazing in the sense that a virus can be amazing. (At least that's what it felt like for me, it was super effective in it's purpose, but not helping anyone. I'm still learning not to wear it.)
I feel you. I’m really lucky to have found a good therapist, but there are a lot of shitty ones out there
The hardest part is that even when you show this to someone, they don't really understand. They counter that they also feel those negative thoughts sometimes, or have a bad day where everything drains your energy, and they think everyone has those. That it's just a normal part of life. What they don't understand is that their energy sucking bad days are my baseline. That I can go below their most bad days, but hardly have a "normal" day like they have, and it all, constantly, uses up energy. Another problem is that if you can explain your situation, most people feel that knowing that is half the battle. You know the problem, so you can fix it, right? Wrong. Knowing the problem means you are aware you are different. Being aware just adds to the guilt and shame that is keeping you down as well. it's a nice vicious circle.
Yes
but how do you know that they don't know?
This is the time
Like what I feel this right now
More than ever
What I do about it?
Keep
Isolate myself completely
To Try to heal my own mind
Which is always bad
But sometimes
Breakly bad at overwhelming
Just think in everything amd just to hate yourself
To
The bone
I’m Isolate myslef
Even if I will gonna be back
I’m gonna
Have more than you show
Speak less than you know
💯
Thats why I never speak
“The hardest part of the day is having the willpower to even get up in the morning.”
-Me and Others
Waking up in the morning hurts
@@lovemrj4ever yeah 😕 it’s so emotionally draining to get up for me cuz I mean I could just stay in my cozy bed and not be worried about people judging me cuz I can just sit there and not think just exist and not have any worries
@@random_potato2756 💖💗I know. I really know. Sending you lots of hugs. Just know you’re not alone. There are a lot of us struggling warriors out there. Our victories are won second by second🌟
@@lovemrj4ever ^w^ ❤️❤️❤️
@@random_potato2756 so much true I have relating to it for many years now
I am relating to these signs more than I'd like to admit.
You are not alone..
Sometimes I just watch these and I’m just like I knew I wasn’t tripping. I wish I could tell other people how I felt ...
My god I thought I was alone...
You’re definitely not alone
@@imaginariansattic769 Nope you are not. Its a struggle that makes you feel alone. Asking for help is hard in the beginning but you have too.
Psilocybin saved my life. I was addicted to heroin for 15 years and after Psilocybin treatment I will be 3 years clean in September. I have zero cravings. This is something that truly needs to be more broadly used in addiction treatment.
Please does anyone know where I can get them? I put so much on my plate and it really affects my stress and anxiety levels, I would love to try shrooms
Psychedelics saved me from years of uncontrollable depression, anxiety and illicit pill addiction. imagine carrving heavy chains for over a decade and then all of a sudden that burden is gone. Believe it or not in a couple years they'll be all over for treatment of mental health related issues.
@Micheal Harris Is he on instagram?
The Trips I've been having have really helped me a lot,I finally feel in control of my emotions and my future and things that used to be mundane to me now seem incredible and full of nuance on top of that I'm way less driven by my ego and I have alot more empathy as well
That's really good. opiates and the worst i know cause I've been hooked on them myself off & on ever since the Dr kept giving them to me when I was only 16 .good for physical pain not emotional pain.
I hate when I tell people how I feel and they tell me how other people have worst than me. But I was just expressing what I was feeling and not complaining. This is the main reason why I don’t share my depressed feelings with other people. I leave the conversation feeling like a waste of space and time.
I'm hearing you there!
People simply don’t know… but many people would cringe in knowing they were insensitive in their responses.
if it's important to you, it's important, full stop. we know others have it worse, that doesn't stop what you are feeling from being important.
I feel u. Like yes i know people have it worse than me stop treating me like an idiot
Same
I hate it when I can’t concentrate because it makes me feel lazy and stupid
I feel you
Me too
Same
I feel ya. I'll catch myself halfway into a daydream and then just sit there zoned out for like 5 minutes before I have the energy to concentrate again.
Same here
"My good day may be your normal day" - this is so poignant. I have small victories that sound kind of lame when I share them with others. Telling someone, "Hey, guess what? Today in a meeting I didn't beat myself up when someone pointed out a mistake I made" just loses its meaning when you say it out loud to someone. Thank you for posting this video.
Listening to an audiobook on self compassion has helped me to deal with this.
I applaud you for your victories.
This was literally me yesterday. We need the victories. Let’s continue to celebrate
When she was talking about a good day for someone with pdd I thought she was talking about a good day for a normal person. Wow
It's hard not to be a bit bitter and very jealous when i find out how easy and natural being productive and functional is for "normal" people.
I'm now wondering what a good day for a 'normal' person is like. XD
same
It would've been considered an extremely productive day for me, and I'd be burned out for the week
I know, me too.
“Whenever someone tells me to ‘Just be happy,’ I want to yell, ‘Oh, hey, depression’s gone! Why didn’t I think of that?’ But usually I just roll my eyes instead.” -Anonymous
Sending love and support all the way from the middle east! I hope your managing. here is my email if you DESIRE to talk to someone (I'm not a therapist) Just want to show that you're not alone!
You can comment, of course, your choice.
super246484@gmail.com
Just get by in a world without conscious, by shutting it out and being anonymous
@@MeemahSN Three Days Grace is the best.
@@APoliticalConfusionAndMess yes, nice to see someone got the reference
@@MeemahSN Their music got me through the toughest times (being a 12-year-old who had to go to court in defense against my father, and being put into foster care).
We remain "high functional" until the moment we can't anymore. It was my biggest mistake, taking so long to seek for help. Don't take too long and don't pay attention to what others think. Only you know how you feel and how you're hurting.
But how? Just pick a therapist or psychiatrist in your area and make an appointment? They work 8a-5p M-F so you have to explain to your boss you need to take time off to see a what? A doctor? Your boss will want to know how your medical issue will affect your work so now you have to tell them it's phycological. Regardless of how nice your boss is, this will shatter your faced at work (so you need to be ready for a REALLY bad day in your own head). Additionally, lots of insurance don't really say if they cover phycological help, most people don't know if they're covered or if they can afford it. True mental health awareness in this country will first work on sheer accessibility to the help you need such as, I don't know, WEEKEND APPOINTMENTS!! - I'm not yelling at you its just the volcano this issue prods within me.
@@kruz2582 Well, every case is different and I understand your concern. In my case, I had to try with 3 different psychologists until I found one that could attend to me at a compatible time. But it was worth it. My quality of life has improved a lot and I feel much happier. I hope you get it too.
We stan this upload schedule always there when I need you like a true friend lol
Yes! Stick with us through thick and thin.
I stan it too!😍😍
Tesla referenced human energy 👻🌪jesus christ referenced living waters 🤍💎science described water memory 🌊👨🎓existence reflecting psychologically psalms16:24 k,j 👻🤍💎👨🎓💖🗽🌪
Something I don’t got
If you are struggling with depression, I can tell you that in most cases it can be dealt with. Though my depression has been under control for years, I remember what it was like. I was super high functioning, because I’d always felt pressure to be perfect. I hid it very, very well, even from myself. I could work effectively, go out, laugh, have fun. But inside I was constantly criticizing myself. Everything was gray. There were no highs in my life, and I felt detached. I started thinking it wouldn’t be such a bad thing if I wasn’t around anymore. I finally got treatment when I started struggling with anxiety. I decided to tell my counselor what I’d been feeling. She looked at me and said, “you’re depressed.” I looked back at her and said, “you’re right.” It was a revelation. I had convinced myself that the way I felt was just what happened as you got older. Everyone, and I mean everyone, was really shocked when I told them. It took months of counseling, along with medication, to start to feel like myself again. My emotions are normal now. I feel the normal ups and downs of life. If I feel I might have a problem, I have a session with my counselor to put it into perspective. If you are struggling, please, please get help. You may feel that the world is better off without you, but you have people who would strongly disagree. You can get through this. I’m rooting for you.
I don't have the energy to even pretend to be happy, but l don't go anywhere or see anyone to pretend around anyway.
Unfortunately too many ppl fall through the cracks. I have good insurance through my husband work and we “make too much “ to qualify for assistance so I can’t afford therapy only meds. Too many ppl need quality help.
Yes that’s me. I put my ‘happy’ mask on every time I go to work, grocery shopping, talking with friends etc. I always feel mentally exhausted at the end of the day because I have to put so much energy into looking and acting normal. It’s been with me since my 20’s and now, many years later it’s getting harder and harder to pretend I feel ok.
Sending ❤
That's my everyday, every moment and every time I see anyone... It's soo physically and emotionally exhausting... I literally hurt at the end of the day.
@@rachelj0an Thank you❤️.
I've had Major Depressive Disorder since I was 14. I learned with time that I don't have to hide myself just to seem like I'm okay. And I don't have to seek the approval of other people. I don't fake smile anymore . If I don't feel happy, I don't hide it. If someone really cares about me, they will ask me "How I am feeling" and actually listen to me like they mean it.
"Oh great, another accurate description of something that is wrong with me."
I know right? It’s getting so bad that I’m beginning to think my brain is automatically taking these examples and temporarily tailoring my personality to them...
@@thebutterscotchkid2481 hey but dont worry, that voyce is not your truly voice, you are always loved, look your brain like something "appart" from you, thanks for exist, how you doing btw????
@@armoapri8662 Fine, for now, mate.
Thanks for asking :>
How are you?
Thanks for the temporary relief :)
I'm sorry but I disagree. I do not believe that "something wrong with" you. Other people think that it is wrong, but it is something that is a normal part of your life. What is wrong is how others view your depression as "wrong." It is what is different about you. It is something that does need addressing but it isn't "wrong."
Action: One day you decide to open up to someone you're close to.
Response: "You're fine. Quit focusing on negative thoughts."
Your Reaction: Resolve to carry on and show no weakness.
Relatable?
very much
but I'm the one who's responding to myself
The only part that people don't realize is that, more often than not, there is little more than negative thoughts, not much else to focus on
when it's the physical thing that makes you depressed or you worry about, it feels like it never goes away
Very relatable
I’ve destroyed every good job I had calling in sick for seemingly no reason other than I can not face the day! Every time I try to talk to my mom about it, she just tells me I need to change my mindset and be more positive. This channel has really helped me feel like I’m not alone on this planet!
That's like telling someone with a broken leg to "walk it off"....mental health IS health too...
There are things you can do to buff your mental health. And I guess that's kind of why you watch this channel. The easiest way is to eat something, particularly whatever kind of nutrition you're lacking. It's also totally fine to take a nap. And if you really having a bed day the best thing you can do is to do the things you find most fun.
You're not alone in that at all sending all the virtual hugs❤
Hang in there. I totally get your situation
It's not yours fault to be upset, you just let your emotions out ande respect them. It's normal that we feel down, it's not a problem
No it's too late now... I was just informed that my senior who I always have a respect for him and we studied in the same class (Anatomy class. He was in the same major as me) He did a suicide this morning while I had an exam....(We're in the middle of final exams right now) He jumped off the building. He had depression. My heart is broken when I knew this news.... I just wish someone would see and go to help him before he did it. But unfortunately it didn't. Thank you for making this video. Your video is going to help lots of people who are suffering from this disease ... 😔😢 Sorry for my English.
hello! That must've been hard news! I'm so sorry you have to go through that and that senior had to go through so much. I'm supporting you and thank you for being brave and sharing that! Again I'm sorry you had to go through that, and I hope that boy goes off to heaven. May God protect him and take him to a good place!
@@sawsansalem5681 yes, it's really hard. Some of my friends couldn't even focus on the exam in the afternoon part. Yes, he'd been through so much. He can rest now in the place that he'll be happy and I hope so. So he won't be tried anymore... Thank you so much 🥺🙏
Sorry for your loss. :'(
Its so hard for guys to speak up about their emotions. I hope your school will raise an awareness in his memory.
May he rest in peace.
I am so sorry
@@Violet.star40 I feel for you. I have lost too many in my life to suicide. I don't like counting it out anymore. The first person I lost too this was my brother.
You and everybody who loves this person; please remember that love never dies. That is how they get to live, only through love. They don't have to live through the pain that brought them to that ending ever again. They love you and they feel the love you have for them. It's not easy on the ones who have to live afterwards. Life isn't about being easy, we can't even be fully ready for the next event. Life is about living, you and all who cared for this person will move forward with them and bring them in your hearts forever. Please know that love exists. It exist in you.
Edit: Love exists in life. Life exists because of you.
Looking back on my 20’s, I realise I had depression, which resulted in chronic fatigue and brain fog as well as feeling an overwhelming sadness. I’m now amazed at the sheer willpower it must have taken for me to get me out of bed, onto the bus and into an 8 hour office job and back home. No wonder I felt totally physically and mentally broken every weekend, and would be off sick every month. I wish I would have sought help, rather than assuming ‘that’s just how difficult life is. I’m obviously just crap at it.’
It never too late
Totally true, even when i was a child, i don't remember to ever be "happy" i always felt alone and isolate, i can only relate to others if I can make them laugh, or make them happy in anyway, if I see a cannot do that, i close in myselfe thinking about how useless i am.
That's me in my 20s all the way to now at the age of 38, it's a lovely existence
Ps I ment lonely but the sarcasm works
OP, mind sharing what worked for you? I’ve sought help for years, many different approaches, but not much progress.
Same.
The "getting help" part is difficult when people don't believe you and treat you like a drama queen or lazy, that's why I just isolate and stop talking to people
That is so True!
That is what I did for the last 10 years, too. And now I have more sever depression and no support because all my friends gave up on trying to reach out to me.
... and my family still says that depression is just lazyness...
Mental Health should be part of basic education...
and how great that i fell like i will be made fun of if i tell somewone about what really happens in my mind
True that! Back then when i just got diagnosed with dysthymia, i heard my mom talking with my older brother how im just overreacting and being a drama queen
Nobody really wants to help, everyone is only ever preoccupied with themselves
I have struggled with PDD for almost a decade and I often feel like a hostage,prisoner,victim of my own mind.
Me too. I hope you reach out to loved ones and speak to a professional. I use a mood-tracker app too (Daylio), it helps me be aware of little positive moments more, gives me that extra 5% happiness.
Good luck!
@Tom I mean I‘m only 22 so sadly a decade feels like a lifetime to me. I can’t even imagine what 40 years more of this will feel like but that’s likely what future holds in store for me as well. And I agree, stoicism helps me too!
😳 shit I feel exactly that way
It is :)
Same
Theres.... There's an actual diagnosis for all this?
I thought all this was just normal, since I've been told I'm either over exaggerating or I have a good home life, I shouldn't be complaining.
I thought maybe it was just teenage hormones at the time too, as I've been told that as well, but it so far continued after as well.
You shoukd seek professional help either way. Hotmones can too alterate our mental status, but if this is influencing in your day to day functionallity, it is a good idea to seek help
Same
I’ve thought the same thing I just brush all my problems aside and say it’s ok others go through these things too
The problem is that ther is no diagnosis of mental disbilities.
You can try checking a DSM.
But I have not oppened one for a decade, so I can't suggest where to look.
One problem, though, is that by knowing the diagnosis, one can learn to fake the symptoms.
I lost my dad 2 weeks ago. He was retired but extremely active around the house, volunteering, and with his hobbies. He was social and excited about plans for the future. His face was full of warm smiles. Then he left us with nothing but a note saying he loves us all and a phone call from the police.
Everyone around him saw him as a rock they could rely on, someone who never faltered or failed to lend a hand to someone in need. I can't know for sure what he was dealing with, but I know for certainthat I wish he asked for help. If you are struggling inside and you're afraid of disappointing people by opening up, please *please* consider being honest with someone about how you're feeling. Even if you feel like you're strong enough to take care of it yourself, all it takes is one off day.
Hi Andrew, I am so sorry for your loss of your dear dad. I wish you and your family peace. Mental illness is still very much stigmatized......those fearful attitudes and lack of empathy is what is wrong with society and people who are suffering don't get the help they desperately need because of those negative attitudes about mental health and being afraid of "being found out" or judged. It's very very sad indeed. You have to be your own advocate and don't stop until you get the help you need.
Andrew, i am sorry for what happened and may your father rest in peace .
It's high time I get help too... Thank u so much for the message down there in the end😭😭🫂
Sending love and light your way
i can’t tell if i actually feel good while with people, or if i’m just pretending to.
same bro, i try to be the person laughing the most to appease people but each time i do so i immediately think back to whether or not i’m actually enjoying their company
Are you conscious of your smile? If so, it's probably a fake smile.
For me starts as my "best face forward," then I typically end up enjoying myself...if it is indeed good company. Otherwise, I just quietly nonconfrontationally pull away.
Heh, same here...
I described myself by “wasting too much energy to fight with myself “ this video made me feel so understood
“Does this sound like someone you know?” Of course I know him, he’s me.
A guy like me? I'm a guy like me!
Of course I know a guy like that. He's me
Hello there?
Same
This is so nice. I've actually been asked in therapy why they thought I needed it because I seemed to be functioning fine with good grades and a good social life... yet I often contemplate if I should go to class or not but drag myself anyway... I feel anxious and my mind blows up the things that might seem little to others to the point of freaking out or breaking down... or the fact I have trouble being alone sometimes because my thoughts spiral... even that simple question made me feel like a fake. That I shouldn't be there and be wasting their time. Why was I even there when my life was put together...
Same, but I can't bring myself to join classes. I disappeared for more than a week💀
Oh god same!
I feel the same.. it’s even easier to fake it with zoom classes. But sometimes i go but don’t listen at all, or go from my bed without camera because i have been crying or not sleeping. Then i go to the zoom reunion for the group project and smile like everything is fine..
@@jbkawaiiholic i work from home so i dont even need to leave the house i dunno if its good or bad o just sleep all the other time
Who are they to judge, are they trying to hold you back, have less expectations, or have worse cases to address... looking at the billing structure and ur on the top tier of function...IDK...🤔
on a "good" day they're the ultimate optimist, on a bad day they're the ultimate pessimist.
edit: i was wrong. reply corrected me.
Agree
Lowkey
Yes!
:) u really be on a roller coaster of emotions and opinions
It’s a personal nightmare and heaven simultaneously
Most days I can find something to be grateful for but I just wish people understood the energy deficit and how much effort it takes just to have a "normal" day. The inertia is sometimes overwhelming.
I don't say 'I was probably lucky'.
When someone Praise me, I just fake smile ...
I usually don't say anything or to those who I trust more I just say "I could have done better" but when they start asking why I'm not proud of my work or sth like that I just change the subject. 😅
Same here... although some ppl at work have caught on to my “fake smile”
I don't do anything, i just look confused. Compliments and praise are confusing.
I'm usually like " oh it wasn't that hard" because I feel like I'm not that skilled and I wanna downplay my achievements as to avoid attention, but then I worry that I'm coming off as prideful :/
I've been trained by college friends to say thank you.... Didn't know it would help my self esteem so much!
You know you're depressed when you take an hour to watch a 10 minute video on depression because it makes you relive too many painful moments
Hey man i know this was written 2 months ago but I wanted to let you know you aren’t alone. Peace bro get well soon!
@@NotACupcake two months ago but still relevant. Thanks. Im hanging in there. I hope everything's going good for you as well
yep, I just keep hitting pause to think and relate...
Oh yeah! Hope you're better now!
@@MaryVerhomi Nope. Definitely worse but I've been putting it all into my music as an outlet/journal
The explanation of a good day really got to me. That day sounded so relaxing and perfect and then the comparison that that is just a normal day to some people… wow man
Same here!
Hey you're subscribed to Summer! I love her music, especially her Thrice and Brand New covers!
I get told, "I don't want to hear that." Especially when I get extremely suicidal...
Me too. It broke my heart.
This makes me wonder if most of the problem is that no one wants to walk this path along side us. Someone to say "I hear you, let's do this together".
That's why I keep my thoughts to myself in the first place
I’ve been fired every time my work finds out I’m dealing with BP. It doesn’t matter if I’m the highest earner or the best trainer or a reliable employee. Mental illness frightens people because they only see the crazy people on tv who hurt other people and do stupid stuff. I just gave up trying to fit in and hiding my true self. It’s exhausting.
@@kasondaleigh it is really bad. And yet so many people run around undiagnosed themselves. I am sorry you have to go through this.
Summary:
1. We constanly feel like we're bluffingz even if we're not. 2:03
2. There is rarely obvious proof of our struggle and need for help 2:59
3. My good day might just be your normal everyday 3:50
4. Bad days are overwhelming and feel imposibble 4:41
5. Getting trough bad days requires amounts of energy, even more than usual 5:49
6. We frequently struggle to focus and we are nor ar the top of our game 6:38
7. Our average everyday means regular routibes can often feel like reforming an olympic tryout x2 in a row 7:22
8. We're not weak because we ask for or recieve help 8:56
Have a good life
Thanks!
Have a good life too :)
Sorry that you have it, stay safe and be happy :)
Thank you and it has time stamps! 🤗
@@alexiswilson3769 sorry, I just mean to say “try” to be happy
Now, at 62, I've lived with this for 53 years since my father committed suicide. Outwards a reasonably successful life; inwards often hollow.
Hugs to you from across the internet, I am so sorry xoxo
@@midorialexandros Thanks!
You are loved, even when it doesnt feel that way. I would like to meet you someday if possible.
You are not alone…
I'm almost 61 and have struggled with depression since I was probably 11. I got really great at the facade of "just fine 🙂". I've been to multiple therapists throughout the years but this series has helped me not only understand myself better, but realize how far I've come from that traumatized child and constantly overwhelmed wife and mother. I've learned so much and continue to heal and grow to be more comfortable with who I am. I also suffered from high functioning anxiety and likely C-PTSD. I was never properly diagnosed so could never properly develop the correct and healthy coping mechanisms i needed. Thank you for being here and thank you for the help I've received from your videos.
Similar here but I’m 36
No comment other than: relatable.
I had a similar deal happen, diagnosed with depression twice a month by different therapists that were only around a week after. It sucks always throwing up that facade, one thing that could just be me, but I was always losing track of a conversation or memory. I can remember the most random little details and everything else just be blank, I'd always go off on random tangents and hop from one train of thought to another in a moments notice. And speaking of I just wrote a giant wall of text. Nice :)
@@kaletowell1527 I relate so much. You aren't alone!
I'll be 60 in May, same amount of time and diagnosis. Lexapro has helped, plus lots of study and self help.
Thank you for sharing. Similar situation minus 20 years and being a wife and mother. Your strength gives me hope.
Alternate title: 8 things to understand abaout yourself that nobody will...
This video helped me figure out what's going on with me, I thought I wasn't depressed because of being able to get up in the morning and go to school and I always felt like I might be attention seeking or victimizing myself and that I was probably exagerating. But I did identify with almost everything you said in this video and it gives me a little bit more peace of mind to know it's a real thing people can struggle with. Thank you
“The hardest part of the day is having the willpower to even get up in the morning.”
-Me and Others
When I get down, the only thing that gets me up is that I know my body will hurt like hell if I stay in bed too long.
This is so accurate. Thank you for this.
I’ve only reached out once and tried to tell someone how I was feeling but was met with silence and disbelief. And at the lowest points when googling ways to commit suicide you don’t have enough energy to ask for help.
Google knows if you're suicidal, so it gives you the number to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline as its top search.
And Google won't tell us!
Funny thing:
when I was good at masking my depression, people did not believe I was depressed
Now I have told some people and they basically give me this whole “surely not, you must be mistaken, just so this or that and it will go away” attitude
The best one was the lady who told me: no, you’re not, you have talked yourself into it.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I mean.... maybe she’s right, it’s my own brain depressing me...
Moral of story: there are some people who will simply not believe depression is a real thing. It should not matter what they think, but sadly it does, because of how you will be treated by these people.
I feel you
True sadly
I hurt my knee in 7th grade and right before 8th grade ended (it was still hurt) my dad said that my mind was purposely making me think it was hurt. I know thats not the case i know why it was hurt, but the fact he said that pissed me off.
I'm a bit scarred to tell my mom about my depression just based on her reaction to me telling her about my adhd. She's almost convinced I'm just scaring myself with what I read. I brought up imposters syndrome the other day because I thought it was interesting for a character I'm gonna write, and she suspiciously asked why I was looking into that. 🤐 No reason, mom, just for a book...
Dear Psych2Go, would you please do a video about gaining self confidence and courage, especially for the girls who have hirsutism?
Please?
And also a video for females to reach out for help when they are raped to feel they will be believed and get justice
I don't want to be rude or disrespectful. I'm just curious what is that?
@@zoe_dawg it’s okay. Hirsutism is a medical condition where girls grow excessive hair(especially in their faces,chins,under the jaw etc.) due to an increased level of androgens. It’s more common in girls with PCOS.
It hurts when everytime i talk about how I feel, they always say that they've already been there. And that they overcame it easily. And I should do the same to. Those things doesn't help. You're basically saying that you can do it on your own and you don't need help. Or we are just taking it so hard. We are just drama queens. We just want someone who will stay, no matter how hard it is to be with us. Someone who will listen, and think a solution together with us. That's all.
And the best thing: When you are already struggeling and then get PMS on top and you are sitting on your desk at work, the Tears half high in your Eyes, fighting with every inch to not burst out in tears (becaus your life just feels like hell ... but it's not) and someone is asking you: "Are you alright?!" and don't undestands why you are waving them away, so you can just keep your composure ... Hormones suck sometimes.
Yes. This.
This.is.my.life.
So why am I watching this knowing that I'm the one who's depressed
Edit :maybe I can help others by watching this
Same
because it's a nice channel and even if you know you have depression it's still interesting to watch it
Hey...
I know I probably can't really help you guys but still...
Have a hug 🤗
Maybe it can make you feel a plbit better...
at least I hope so. :)
Because they sometimes offer ways to help.
It also helps in some small way to know that I'm not alone and that what I'm struggling with is valid, you know?
Ok, I just found out I have dysthymia, what-
I thought I was crazy and just an idiot and lazy someone who struggled to wake up because I’m “lazy” but.. this video helped me understand there is a bigger problem.
Same
Yeah
I hope you seek help soon if you haven't yet. I waited way too long but it finally feels like there might be hope to get better since I go to therapy.
I find this hilariously accurate.
T_T
Um... Is that a good thing or....
I giggled at how accurate it was.
True lol
@@andoryuu3 I was clinically diagnosed so I believe that what you stated is 100% false.
My family thinks i wanna mooch off others and be lazy. I really hate it could shut off my bipolar disorder/ depression
“All is good” facade. I felt that, and it made me tired.
Yes😞it takes so much energy
Wore me out
This has been my motto ever since ( I'm now realising it was just to fake it, till I make it?) 😒
As someone with high functioning depression, this was really accurate. The burden of HFD is heavy, always having to put on a happy face and pretending everything is okay, when in reality all I want to do is curl up in my bed, cry, go to sleep, and never wake up. It feels like everyone is against you because “you don’t look depressed” or “but you’re productive” or “eh, teenagers” are very common responses I get when I open up to people I don’t completely %100 trust
Holy crap, I actually started tearing up watching this. I’ve been unemployed for 2 years bc how miserable life just always felt no matter how hard I tried. I was able to hold a job and would go rock climbing and workout all the time had friends had no problem with girls but was NEVER happy and always felt drained. I have a habit of just quitting my jobs for “being too much” and just leaving, I think I need to go see a therapist again and specifically so them to treat me for PDD bc they always say I have depression but never do anything to help me
why is it that i can manage my weekly workload and keep my grades straight but can't make my mental outlook a lot better for shit.
Sending love and support all the way from the middle east! I hope your managing. here is my email if you DESIRE to talk to someone (I'm not a therapist) Just want to show that you're not alone!
super246484@gmail.com
I started bullet journaling. Once I had my schedule, health, and feelings on paper it became clear why I felt I was on the verge of a break down. I was able to start seeing patterns I needed to change and problems I didn't know were problems. Like when I see a unhealthy pattern, I look up and ask how I can change it. When I see a lack of something good I want, I do the same to add it in my life. I've still got a long way to go but now I have some type of guide to do better.
This sounds a lot like me. But I’ve spent my whole life telling myself I don’t have it so bad, and I should just keep my head down.
I mean this is all common stuff really everybody feels this from time to time just know that there’s billions of people who feel exactly the way you do
@@usernamehere2411 why I can't even get a single person that truly understand me I mean I have been searching it for ages now
Yes
@@usernamehere2411
The big difference lies in the fact that “normal” people feel like this on and off every once in a while.
Those of us who suffer with this have it for long periods. In fact, if you feel like this for three months on end, that’s when you can call it depression. That’s when it stops being “I’m depressed” and it becomes “I have depression”
I dunno how they came with the three month period, but this is what I was told when I was diagnosed by experts.
“Normal” people have no clue what it is when it just drags on and on. They have the feeling of “this too shall pass”.
And yes, I call them normal, because suffering from depression is not the norm for humans. It’s not how we are supposed to be.
@@usernamehere2411
I’m sorry, but when you call this common stuff that everybody feels from time to time.... you remind me of those people who don’t get it. Who trivialize it. Who, at first sympathize, but then when, in their eyes, your issues are taking to long to resolve, they lose patience and start telling you things like: get over it, you’re just doing this for attention, I got over it, why can’t you.
Everybody gets sad or depressed
Not everyone suffers from depression.
Two VERY different things
Struggling to get out of bed everyday makes me feel like a failure before the day has even begun.
As for reaching out for help, in the U.K. that’s virtually impossible to get beyond more medication which robs you of the remaining energy you might have. Well that’s my experience in any case.
I agree, I was on meds for 10 years and literally slept those 10 years away, I always felt drugged.
Have you tried Weed ?
I am in Germany and it's a bit the same thing , I rightfully or not think demanding drugs may just silence the problem but I side kill me more. As I already take a lot of drugs because of a bad stroke depression life maybe got me into I am a little sceptic. Also I agree on everything in this video, and am at the point where I do see I need outside help also.
Honestly, I just manage this with compartmentalizing everything, both good and bad emotions, and procrastinating with meaningless pleasures until my mind has a semblance of order
The hardest thing about being high functioning, for me in my experience, is that everyone didn't believe I needed as much help as I did. Still, I think I have to prove that my disorder is Serious to get support. But, even I wouldn't accept my diagnosis for the longest time and was my own worst enemy. It was a self defeating cycle. I lost the confidence of a lot of my family who didn't understand the clinical aspects. And the professionals couldn't force me to take their advice and sometimes wouldn't be straight with me bcz they thought I wasn't going to listen, anyway. Things are much better after nearly 20 years of learning what I needed and how to work with professionals and be my own advocate with them and my family and friends. Now I want to go back to being a productive member of society with the added benefit of knowing a lot more about myself and maybe helping other people who have problems or know someone who does. Cheers
I was diagnosed for cyclothymia almost 15 years ago and about 4 years ago with dysthymia and still most of the time I believe deeply that I am just a fake. Maybe I really am. That to the point you made of not accepting the diagnose. I am happy that you are better now and I hope its only going to get better for you.
@@vincentfreeman4987 hang in there. improvement usually comes slowly and frequently people closest to you notice how you've changed even better you do. Here's a couple things that are/were really hard to accept, but are useful - you are worthy of Love and Life, Love yourself, take care of yourself with lifestyle changes and self-care, don't engage with negative people, anywhere, smile and nod or change the channel, keep searching for the best support care people, they're out there. Consider getting a dog. You have to take them out at least twice a day and even if you can't care for (take care of) yourself it's easy to care for (Love) a dog because they don't judge. Use your judgement, not mine, don't over think it but don't be rash on your decision for that one 🤓👍💪🤗🤗🤗🤝🙏🙏
Dysthymia/PDD is the diagnosis I've been given when my depression had lasted for 10 years. It's now been 12 and I still feel completely misunderstood by some of the people around me...
My friend told me she has dysthymia.
👁👄👁 no wonder she was doubtful that we won’t be friends with her anymore ( We’re still friends 😌✨💓)
What’s that?
@@balleralert8 the topic of the video :)
High functioning depression
@@DieKleineMimose oh okay Is that like the scientific name of hfd? Or something
Please don't leave her. You might get shocked when find out when you left her.
I wish I had friends to worry about them leaving me, lol
People don't understand the drain socializing or tasks when you have mental illnesses. It means a lot hearing someone describe it
honestly 😭😭 i was so drained after school or my jobs and felt like an ass cause i didn’t want to interact anymore w family or my bf afterwards and i thought it was a me thing.
I absolutely resonate with this film. I have Dysthymia along with many other Mental struggles. I was relived that you could put into words the things that I have been trying for years to get others to understand. This includes my surviving parent My Daddy. If it were not for your films giving me the courage to even attempt yet again to explain these things in a way that "Most Normal" people can even conceptualize before we even think about trying for an understanding. For that and these videos I thank you so ever much!!!!
I struggle with my mind like it is a raging waterfall that feeds into itself. Each drop is yet another instance, memory, filter that was put into place by either conditioning environmental interactions or from the decades of self therapy, I love how you described the relentless assault we have no real control over that goes on in our head. To me it is like watching a war rage around you as you fight it and being not only the witness but also the narrator too. I have a Phrase called your needle is stuck, and this references that loop like instance when a vinyl record has a scratch and the needle that tracks the music to play. it skips and also repeats and may even get Stuck going over the same moment over a thousand times in my mid. I can loose hours lost in thought. I am aware of everything, but sometimes my ability to even care (even though I want to) usually is too exhausting.
Like I told my dad that what I show and do for others is what I need the most back from them. In this sense I mean this: If I went through the massive effort to even just tell you or express to you something that is bothering me, that I would like some help with, or that I may even admit that I just can't seem to get through something; Then PLEASE FOR THE LIFE"S SAKE TAKE ME SERIOUSLY! just because I am not outwardly showing the painful chaos I may be going threw ALL THE TIME, Does not in any way shape or form Diminish the importance or absolute necessity I have for having even asked. I constantly remind myself that things are different for every single one of us. That we ALL have that one special thing called FREE WILL. So, is it right of me to put these problems on another's shoulders when they could be going through their own struggles? When I just as easily get blown off, told just let it roll off your shoulders, don't worry about it, That is just how they are, ect I feel even more guilty and horrible for even having confided in that person in the first place. Struggling each day while constantly actively being legitimately treated as tho I and my existence does not matter to these individuals. Yet, at the same time constantly reminded of just how little they care while spreading lies and comments that only push me further into despair. I can choose to say something like my mind screams at me to do, Because it KNOWS that what is going on is WRONG in so many ways, but I continue to suppress myself out of self preservation. In the Lies of Hope that I may be able to escape from this hell one day. Only to realize that I will never be free or taken seriously Regardless of all the work, time, energy, effort, struggles, ect That I argue with myself every minute about weather my existence is even really wanted besides what OTHERS want, need, or demand out of me. While at the same time NEVER ONCE RECIPROCATING that consideration, kindness, or effort back when it comes down to taking that HUGE step and asking for help. How to help I may not know, but My screams for help only land on deff ears. Sometimes it could be the simplest thing like ACKGNOWLAGING that I need the most. Or even a simple Please or thank you or omg that you appreciate my efforts or attempts of something.
Then their is the biggest issue of all. People treat my High functioning (only out of years of recognative thinking and mental training with my filters) mental problems as nothing but a lie, an excuses or even as a way for me to get attention. I should be just fine by their standards. I am over thinking things, over reacting, over complicating things, I should be able to just move on, push threw it every single moment of my life.
Like MY problems and issues are less impactful or important as something they can see just how harmful and horrible that is a PHYSICAL issue.
Like my mental disabling issues are just something I make up to get things out of people. That even if I know that I will NEVER amount to anything but crap in their eyes over the absolute best possible potential is so readily possible for those that have a Physical limitation... Please PM me and let me know your thoughts BESIDES getting out of that kind of environment, I would have if I could have already.
Thank you to all the wonderful team and All other Life management peoples, and those most special That do send me a PM on face book or reply to this. Thank you!
Also I am sorry for the lengthy response. Even if it is 2 years old video. I still appreciate it just the same.
As someone who has long-term depression, I'm well practised at putting on a mask... so a lot of this does make sense :-)
The first half I was like "yeah I do this but it's not that big."
Second half
*Low-key fighting off tears of relatability*
😅
I think the worst thing about depression is that everyone can see what it does to you and how you struggle to survive and yet they seem to be completely clueless (by choice?) as to what's causing the struggles. I guess it's easier to call you lazy or tell you that you need to force yourself to get up and do things rather than acknowledge that you have a serious problem. I went to a counselor for a while and he told me that the people who had the least sympathy and understanding for others suffering from depression were family members who were also suffering from depression. He said they almost always labeled the other family members as lazy and worthless rather than entertain the idea that they too might be suffering from depression. He had the unique perspective of someone who was treating both family members without either of them knowing he was treating the other. It's hard to believe the stigma of mental health issues is still alive and well in our so called enlightened world today.
"I'm fine" is my go to phrase even though I'm not
2:59 This reminded me when I told to my grandma that one night I started crying and couldn't stop, and that my cat tried to comfort me. Instead of asking me "are you ok? You need help?" she told me that I had no reason to cry because I live in a beauty house and I have food.
It really hurts.
Sending love and support! I hope your managing. Here is my email if you DESIRE to talk to someone (I'm not a therapist) Just want to show that you're not alone, you don't have to trust me! Just a random stranger checking up on you!
You can comment, whatever makes you comfortable!
super246484@gmail.com
@@sawsansalem5681 Thank you so much for your support!
"If your live is so perfect why are you sad" is obviously not the best response but I think she just wantet to show you how great your live is from her perspective.
@@cinemaatrium3863 Yeah, I know she was trying to make me feel better. But the other day my grandfather (not her husband) died because of an illnes, and she told me to not cry because she would cry too.
I know that she's doing her best, and I love her, but it hurts.
I know. Responses like this makes me think about answers like "who told you I don't have food, beautiful house, youth, all my life ahead to create things etc. 🙄 I'm telling you I don't want to."
This is pretty accurate. Even when you are diagnosed with high functioning depression, you will lie to yourself and think it will go away with time. This condition can distort your perception on reality. Especially when the wracking sadness happens. It takes slot out of you and you wonder why you are so weak compared to everyone else. You start to think you can’t do any better and you keep getting fired from crappy jobs. Your tolerance for emotional abuse is much lower. To the point where you cannot have close relationships. Good ones always fall apart, either by your doing, or theirs. Your sense of competence is much lower and you are likely to slowly die inside. Not being dramatic, just saying how it can be. Medication can help, but you may experience emotional blunting.
I hate admitting it, but I am exactly all of this (and yes, it took a LOT for me to say it here, let alone anywhere).
Ah yes, because I keep up with everything and more, and still be depressed. It really sucks because other people just dismiss our words because we seem "okay".
And even when you don't seem okay, they still dismiss you.
This literally made me cry because of how true it is. I literally got diagnosed and my parents didn’t change anything with what they say; stuff like like you’re lazy, it’s not the end of the world, you’re always sad!, why do you sleep so much, you’re so ungrateful, and other things like that.
Having HFD & ADHD at the same time is a nightmare!! Especially if I forget to take my meds! 🤦🏻♀️
Mine comes out as functional neurological disorder.
Oh. Do share. I’m on a waiting list to get assessed for ADHD. And have been getting therapy for depression for 2 years now but I’m starting to find it unhelpful and just meh. I think ADHD might be the real issue causing the HFD and all. Now I’ve gotten a bit better at letting people know I’m struggling and need help, but honestly I probably look competent and fine and happy to everyone unless they’re one of the few I have specifically spoken to and cried in front of. And it’s all so exhausting too, making those efforts to let people know, on top of already just working so hard to (almost) cope with everyday life. And I am constantly struggling near the crumpling point, which I now know can really happen, because it already has. But I am thankful that I at least have these people around that I trust are on my side and will not actively try to use what I tell against me. Btw do you follow the channel HowToADHD? I highly recommend it. Best content ever and place to find solidarity and encouragement for someone with ADHD.
Depression certainly isn't easy. I'm not the only one in my family who has been diagnosed with depression. Both my father and I suffer from it and have continously felt invalidated by my mother from her saying things like, "It's all in your head." "You're fine." "Stop feeling that way." And "It's just a phase." It hurts to hear things like that from the people you care about. It's even worse when someone you think should understand what you're going through or feeling makes you feel invalidated saying things like, "You have it easy." "I've gone through worse." And "Nothing should make you feel the way you do." That invalidation can make you feel empty inside and like you can never be heard. You stop trusting people with your emotions so you shut people out. When my emotions get to high I try to shut down until someone pushes too far then I tend to explode and release all those emotions which results in me feeling horrible and ashamed afterwards. I push myself everyday to get out of bed, force my emotions aside, take my medications, to interact with people, and to go to work everyday. I find myself thinking, "I shouldn't be feeling this way." And "It's not normal." But I feel like I'm stuck in a loop with no way out. I'm sure alot of other people could feel the same. I keep telling myself that others out there suffer with worse and I have no right to feel the way I do. Not only do the people I care about invalidate how I feel, but I also end up doing it to myself. Neither of my parents could ever be my emotional support because of how emotionally absent they are so I don't tell them that I'm struggling or suffering. It's a vicious cycle that I don't want anyone else to suffer from, so when it comes to other people I let them lean on me and I listen to everything they say and try to help them. No matter how bad my depression or anxiety get I mask it well with my empathy. I want to be someone that others can reach out to but I also want to be able to reach out to someone without being afraid of how they will react to me trying and failing to express what's going on. I know I shouldn't unload this into the comment section of a video but this channel strikes a cord with me and so do alot of the other comments. I wish everyone the best and I hope they can find someone to confide in and walk beside.
You summarized my life, word for word.
sounds terrifyingly familiar 😞
It has been over two years since you posted your comment, so if it's okay I hope you'll indulge me 😇 because I'm honestly really curious and I would love to know how you're doing these days? If I may ask, of course 😊
@@southernjulip2403same with mine too😢
🙏 ❤
@@TheBauwssss I have a son now with someone I love very much who understands me. I still go through ups and downs as well as I still try to tear myself down but the one I love helps me through it. When I wrote this comment I think I was still living up north now I live down south. Life is slowly getting better and I'm going to make sure my son never experiences what I did or feels how I did growing up. My comment sounds all too familiar to many people especially since most people treat mental illnesses as if they don't exist.
Hearing the point about a "normal day" made me go: "Wait, that's supposed to be normal and BORING? That sounds AMAZING!"
Yesss
I honestly don't know why people dislike these sorts of videos...
They have fat fingers like me
They are the type of fools that think that these are lies or excuses.
They get triggered ( by something they know they have but try to deny it).
Thank you for this. I used to have almost all of these symptoms before I got help.
proud of you, ethan!
It's good you're getting professional help! How did you get started?
@@Psych2go I studied mental health at school and when I realized I had all the symptoms, I realized I could avoid pain by getting help!
I need help i take antidepressants but they dont work anymore
I'm almost certain that I have this. I hate being a burden on people, so I hide my pain (which is also physical. I've had constant back pain for about 5 years now and having to work a normal job with it is excruciating and impacts my mental health as well). There are literally points where one form of pain becomes so overwhelming that I can no longer hide either, and I have found a quiet place at work, dropped to the floor to lie on my back, and essentially broke down in physical and mental anguish for 10-15 minutes just to give me enough respite to pick myself up and carry on. Fortunately no one has ever found me like this, so the mask holds for now.
This is me. And as someone who is studying to becoming a doctor, means that it's even harder for me to function in a high stress environment. I've mentally collapsed more times than I can count. The exhaustion this video explains for persons couldn't be more accurate. Dear Lord it's too much. Thank you so much for this video.
I know I’m late, but it might be a good idea to consider other career paths that are lower stress. For me personally, school was very stressful. I felt I couldn’t drop down to a regular class (perhaps you feel the same pressure to become a doctor) but when I finally did, I felt and feel better. It’s not perfect, my depression is not gone, but I no longer feel like I’m on the verge of death and can at least get through my days. I even have a few smiles again like I did years ago, and it doesn’t feel like I’m always faking being normal/happy/my entire personality
@@flitefulwantssubs402 thanks for your reply. I completed medical school and I'm looking into specialties that have lower stress levels or seeing if there are ways to get into hospital administration that have also have more predictable hours and lower stress levels just for a healthier state of mind.
Someone that has high-functioning depression usually turns to drugs and alcohol or some other addiction. Just to escape the reality of being depressed... it really sucks!!
Yeah it's really really hard to give up smoking, alcohol and other drugs after requiring them all along to attempt to cope with your adult life. But it's worth it. 4 years clean now and I'm starting to really take control of my mental health. It's good shedding all the facades, and it gave me the chance to really give a chance for meds to work and give objective opinion if antidepressants needed to be adjusted/ changed.
Yep I experience it a lot in my life
Someone else: How's your day?
Me trying not to be rude: good...
*me pondering if I want to deal with that person's mock empathy*
"Yeah, I'm doing fine"
it's like you're required to lie
What I feel is that if I talk about it to someone, I would look like I'm crying for attention which is something that keeps me from opening up.
Edit- I'm actually fine and not crying for help.
Sending love and support all the way from the middle east! I hope your managing. Here is my email if you DESIRE to talk to someone (I'm not a therapist) Just want to show that you're not alone, you don't have to trust me! Just a random stranger checking up on you!
super246484@gmail.com
@@sawsansalem5681 That's really sweet of you that you want to help everyone. Thank you for that! But I have a question for you. Are you doing alright yourself? I kinda feel like that you're also struggling yourself, but still wanting to help others.
@@kadrikapa5855 Hello Hunny, Thanks for your concern! I really just feel like I was blessed with people to talk with and I'm trying to help as much as people as I can because everyone deserves that! It's devastating to think of everyone struggling alone! I'm fine though just caught up with a lot! Thank you so much. What about you, how are you? want to talk about anything? Thank you so much you honestly made my day.
Hello👋
That's exactly how I feel. I want to come out as bi-curious, but with my sister having come out as a lesbian and my parents not believing what I say 90% of the time, I'm scared they'll just think I'm wanting attention.
I suppose that's how I've come out, I guess. XD
I’ve been going to therapy on and off for such a long time because I wanted to have a better life. I just can’t think of a time in my life when I was happy but all the psychologists I saw told me I was not depressed, I was just sad. Recently I found a new therapists and she told me I might have dysthymia. We’re still not sure if I have it or not (we’ve had only two sessions so far) but it feels good to not have my feelings dismissed and to have a name for what’s going on with me. That way I feel like I can fight it
I remember myself sitting in a session (during my low-ish phase) and the therapist asking me a simple question - what are you looking forward to? I remember myself just sitting there and unable to figure out a single thing - while getting through a divorce, damn pandemic and stuff (luckily still able to work...). It quite caught me off guard. For me it's often even difficult just to recognize and admit that I'm in my lows - I struggle with this for years, I have better times, worse times, the worst is that it mostly seems out of my control.
But so far I figured out that there is one thing that sends me in my lows - when I have too much of "unfinished business" - I don't know how to say it better in English (not a native speaker).
It means that there are too many things I haven't solved in my life - and it may be just little things like fixing something broken at home - but when there are just too many of them, I get too overwhelmed, it simply occupies my mind too much. And it helps me to take care of these things, slowly, one by one, and this can make a tremendous change that I really start feeling better and in control of my life.
I don't know if this is in any way applicable to you, everyone is different, but I wanted to show you that the "recipe" for you could be out there somewhere waiting for you to be discovered and that it's possible to find it - and wish you luck with your fight! 🤗
I personally have the issue of when a bad day hits I truly fear what I could do I don’t know if anyone else has this problem but I call them depression attacks, does anyone have this problem? If so what do you do to stay safe?
Now I know so much about psychology through Psy2go, I might as well consider doing another graduation with psychology as a major 😉
You can! Keep us posted!
@@Psych2go One time my older sister thought your channel was bad because she walked in on me while I happened to be watching a video about toxic parents. She told me that my parents aren't toxic and demanded I change the video.
My parents really aren't toxic irl. My sister just decided to punish me for curiosity.
“We’re not stupid or lazy” my self esteem 👀
I only recently discovered this channel and I gotta say, I'm tearing up at this video because it's like my feelings finally have words. I've been having problems with this for a few years, and my relationship with my gf has suffered for it to the point where it might end in a few months if things don't change.
I've written and erased this at least five times. Even though this post is younger than an hour. (Well more now since I started writing this comment...)
This is a good example of my daily. I also struggle with Complex PTSD.
Anyway thank you!
Oh and I signed up for the mag
Additional Edit: I also lost my father this year, it was very unexpected. The day it happened I was already feeling like your slightly bad day was worse than losing the one man who loved me because I didn't want to take away from what others were living through. Also because I still ran at base line, I thought I was in a good place. But was so happy when I did barely above base.
I really needed somebody to drive everybody else home. (Everybody who was venting to me about their emotions; when it was about my dad and how they felt bad, or they just had something going on personally. I couldn't be a soundboard anymore.) I just wanted to rest. So I could figure out me, so I could access my pain. I needed help and support. However I didn't know how to ask well enough to the right friends and asked the wrong person to help.
Not that person's fault they just never had the tools. They may have never had that loss of life and they can't support without experience. They also couldn't support me though this because they literally couldn't grasp the reach of this kind of depression.
In the last few months I keep up with my professional help and have better people around who have the tools to support me as well. I am lucky to have a good support network that is as able as possible to see my daily struggle and love me though it all.
It is still a struggle and sometimes I wonder if I can make it. The help I have are still not used to me asking for help. They are used to me being strong for everyone. That's why I work on my mental health so I can still share and help someone else. We don't need to feel alone.
When no one is there; I realize being here by myself, isn't being alone.
Being here is being me, and I love me and I know how to take care. I can always love me, which means I will always love.
I believe we all Love forever!
Remember to love the ones who seem like they can take it all, they may need you to see them more clearly.
They may need someone to drive everyone one else home for them.
@@ibcheel9021 I am happy that you are doing a very good job by seeking professional help. Not everyone is as strong as you, I swear. Plus you are a really nice and kind person, you still want to help other people. You have been doing amazing stuff, keep up the good work . Cheers!
@@thinhdoan1606 thank you! 🖤💙♥️
Do you know what symptoms led to your C-PTSD diagnosis on top of PDD? (If I might ask!) I was diagnosed with PDD but I feel like I might have C-PSTD as well (but I'm not sure if my therapist knows about it).
@@Surfergirl0711TRIGGER WARNING!
Stop reading if you need!
This is long, and you may want to consider if this might trigger you. I was diagnosed with C-PTSD as a child.
I was raped as a child for around two years or more. Ages 4 - 6. This happened with close trusted family (who also raped my brother in front as punishment for me fighting back) and then later around the age of 7, with highschool football players who lived in my neighborhood. (Nobody was ever charged because I lived in a very Mormon community who convinced my mom that I would be ruining those boys futures because those football players already had scholarships to BYU. Nobody being charged messed me up more.)
The high functioning depression came from a mix of that and following years of losing people around me.
My brother killed himself when I was 11, only month after I failed my 3rd attempt. I am now 36 and have gone through so many close deaths, from suicide, to overdose, to illness, to sudden deaths. I unfortunately haven't always had the best cards given to me.
I went though intense therapy as a child, and was treated pretty well. I was in this therapy from the age of 7 until 14, when we just didn't have the money for my therapist. I would also maintain therapy in anyway I could during my years as a teenager. I would read many books about my condition, talk to support lines, even my school counselor and I knew I wasn't alone. I have as an adult maintained therapy.
The High Functioning Depression comes from the mix of my abuse (having to hide it all the time) to having to be the support for the many personal deaths I've experienced.
I am listed as high functioning because even when a new death happens (such as my father's sudden passing) I can/will still maintain. This comes from my internal struggles. I don't lay down and let life roll me over. Even if there are times when I should. I just don't know how to rely on others.
Always with all of the work I do it's hard to trust. I just feel like I'm the only one who can let myself down. That way nobody else will have that control and be able to let me down.
So to try to make this shorter. My HFD comes from needing some kind of control. It is directly tied to my experiences of C-PTSD, as I have always had to "maintain" or else...
Remember mental health takes work. You need to know the "job" you have to stay focused on and also keep your tools sharp, and also keep your eyes open for new tools.