I lost my son to an aggressive form of throat cancer, he was only 42 and left behind a teenage son who was badly affected by his loss. It was all over in 3 weeks despite having undergone an extensive laryngectomy 6 months earlier. A year after the event I still get effectively coshed by grief that creeps up from behind. This can be provoked by memories, objects, scents or sensations without warning. I simply break down and cry for a minute or so, wobbles I call it, at the age of 69. I have no answer to this, a grief struck father, but my colleagues at work are supportive and understanding. I do believe in an afterlife and look forward, not in fear, but in hope. All things must pass, my grief and all the suffering that fills our planet, remember those who grieve and try and support them.
I'm so sorry and I know that you're likely tired of hearing that but it's my most honest reaction. I have no children because of the crippling fear of outliving them. 42 is way too young I hope because I'm 42 myself. Moving on is impossible but enjoying aspects of your life post loss isn't disrespectful to your son's memory. Never forget that. =)
My mother passed away due to liver failure a year ago. Although I was very quick to get back out into the world, that didn't mean I wasn't going through tremendous grief. I remember being so angry for the longest time at not only the nurses that discharged her while waiting on a transplant that never came and allowed her to come home from another state, but also at myself for not acting on my instincts fast enough when I would see her in my home for the very last time due to her body experiencing a septic shock that I had to literally beg my dad to let me call 911 in the middle of the night because he was in denial about something being seriously wrong. The worst part was that the shock initially happened early in the morning, while I was asleep, and even despite my gut telling me something was wrong, I kept ignoring it in hopes it would be wrong and that she would wake up. And when she got transferred back to the state she was initially getting care for for her transplant, I was very against it because deep down I knew that even if she survived the initial transfer, so many things could go wrong that she could catch as a result and that's exactly what happened. The stress from the transfer had a delayed response on her body, leading her to catch an infection and then resulting in her lower gi area to burst and do irreparable damage. It was literally the worst time of my life and looking back at it still makes me very depressed despite accepting the fact that she's gone. While I mostly hid my grief from public, that didn't mean I wasn't prone to snapping. This was most common when I'd play competitive video games or if my dad needed something that I couldn't afford to get due to being the only person in my family working at that time. When I did snap, it was bad, and I do hate myself for it because I know that's not who I am as a person. Fortunately things are starting to look up, especially now that I've been in counseling to help get through this grief. My dad is even on the right track and back working, and I'm working towards fulfilling I made to my mom nearly two years ago to complete college if anything were to happen to her. I got scholarships I'm striving towards, and I know she'd be proud at how far I've come in such a short time after this shocking and horrendous ordeal. To anyone who still has living parents that they're close to, cherish the remaining time you have with them. You'll never know when the sun will set on them and be time for them to join the stars along with millions of others who have had passed on.
Experiences like these are awful and soul-crushing, but the strongest people have the power to press forward and keep working toward the life they want. Your mom is proud of all the wonderful things you are doing in your education, and I'm excited to see how you overcome every trial (even though I might not in this life all things are known in the heavens :)!
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
My dad committed suicide a month ago. My mom sent me this video, it was nice. I think I go through multiple of these stages throughout a single day and the cycle continous.
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
My mom committed suicide on 9th June and she was my whole world. In her goodbye email she mentioned she was dealing with depression for 2 years and nobody knew about it and she hit it well. I’ve come to this video to understand why everyone kept referring to the 5 stages. I will remember this as I battle to live one day at a time. My worst nightmare has come true. Miss you mumma. We’ll make you proud and carry your legacy forward.
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
My first true love stopped loving me. She broke up with me and quickly moved on. I loved her with all my heart and went through all the stages of grief. They weren't in that order, and I cycled through them. I ended up pushing her away as a friend because I went to her for comfort, not realizing the toll it was taking on her. I shouldn't have vented to her, but got therapy instead. She now doesn't even want to talk to me, therefore, I am now grieving our friendship.
The person you broke up with you, you went to her for support and pushed her away as a friend? So after you broke up you befriended her, I’m confused. If you break up with me and be with someone else, you’re not going to be my friend.
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
So true, first when I lost my job and afterwards my husband in a car accident. I came out of these grief stages through yoga and meditation. I did opposite of what my heart wanted at that time, to remain alone and keep on thinking about what happened and why ? Slowly and gradually I got rid of depression but now after those terrible ten or twelve year, I can easily spend my time alone without over thinking and going into depression. Thank God.
I lost my hubby last year (he was only 38, I'm 34)...I remember going numb, I just shot down for about 2 weeks - just to funeral. And after that I couldn't just stay home and look at all his stuff so I went to work, more hours and 2 additional side jobs helped me a lot. I got rid of the things that was in my eye view and just day by day I got better. i remember anger and despair but it was short period. I must admit that I was taking antidepresants for half year, didn't go through any therapy, just healed myself with work and being around people :)
@@jomalinsdiary9373 Just don't give up, treat yourself gently and give yourself time to heal 💐 Peace will eventually come I promise. The memories of him will never disappear but they will become more joyful. He was big part of your life 🌹 I wrote my comment more than 5 months ago and one week after I found out I'm being pregnant with my first child 😱 how? I have PCOS and type 1 diabetes, heard many time that I will never be a mother. We were trying for many years and I guess it was just not meant to be. I'm not religious, but it was someones finger there 💐 so.. Don't you ever give up, life is out there and it can be beautiful ❤️❤️❤️
@@jomalinsdiary9373 don't give up 💐 treat yourself gently and give yourself more time to heal, the peace will come I promise ❤️ He was a big part of your life, the memories of him will never disappear but will become more joyful 💐 I wrote my comment more than 5 months ago and one week after I found out that I'm pregnant with my first child 😱 how? I have PCOS and type 1 diabetes and heard many times that I will never be a mother. We were trying for many years but I guess it was just not meant to be. I'm not religious but I feel like it was someones finger there. So.. Don't you ever give up! Life is out there and can be beautiful ❤️❤️❤️🌹🌹🌹
@@jomalinsdiary9373 Don't give up..just treat yourself kindly and give yourself more time to heal.❤ He was a big part of your life. The memories of him will never disappear but will become more joyful I promise! 💐I wrote my comment more than 5 months ago and after maybe a week I found out I was pregnant with my new partner! I was in shock because i have PCOS and type 1 diabetes and heard many times I will never be a mother...but here I am! So...don't you dare to give up, life is out there and it can be bautiful 🌹🌹🌹Don't isolate and think positive, the change will come 🌼
@@jomalinsdiary9373 Don't give up..just treat yourself kindly and give yourself more time to heal.❤ He was a big part of your life. The memories of him will never disappear but will become more joyful I promise! 💐I wrote my comment more than 5 months ago and after maybe a week I found out I was pregnant with my new partner! I was in shock because i have PCOS and type 1 diabetes and heard many times I will never be a mother...but here I am! So...don't you dare to give up, life is out there and it can be bautiful 🌹🌹🌹Don't isolate and think positive, the change will come 🌼
This is so true. I lost my grandma when i was 15 (she raised me), i literally went through all the stages. At first, i was in shock, i couldn't believe it. And then i was so angry at everything, at God at my parents, myself, the universe. I was angry that death exists. I was resenting everyone who is alive. Then i was trying to make sense of the whole thing. I tried to convince myself i could see her again. I would try to convince myself my dreams were real that it was really her or i would try to believe you can reserve death somehow. I tried to find logical, scientific facts that could prove I could see her again (i know i sound insane). And I realized no... so the depression started. I didnt talk to people, i couldnt eat. All i did was lying in her bed. I would smell her clothes to have clear memories and cry and cry. But finally I understood. I realized there is nothing i could do but accept. Its been 20 years since she is gone. I miss her so much, the pain of losing her never disappears but it is manageable. To everyone out there dealing with the loss of a loved one, i wish you all the strength in the world. ❤️
I lost one of my best friends three days ago. I have been stably on the stage of depression. I miss her so much and I know life will never be the same without her.
It's nature when we lose our friends, or our member of family. When you have been after two weeks deprission you can make a session with a psychologist.
"They say there are 5 stages of grief - denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Well, I’d like to add one more... Revenge." - Cruella (Emma Stone)
I lost my daughter father and she is the only reason I'm alive rn but I don't know how long I can go. I was already suffering from depression so it triggered it and I'm feeling to die I don't have anyone to talk or help me I think my end is coming.I can't eat much even with a tonic I'm just checking out without much effort.
I'll be praying for you. He gives his strongest soldiers the hardest battles to prepare us for VICTORY. Iknow it's hard I've been at the bottom. Now I'm here talking to you. May you and your family have a blessed night.
Currently going into my senior year of college, when I was a freshman I had my first ever girlfriend. Being that she was my first, I jumped head first with my feelings into that relationship and got my heart broken after about a month. I went through these exact stages of grief which lasted about three months which was excruciatingly painful but was necessary for me to grow and mature as a person. Even after those three months of grieving and I was over her, there would still moments here and there where she crossed my mind and when it first happened it would make me feel sad. It rarely happens now but when it does it actually makes me feel happy because if I hadn’t gotten my heart broken by her, I wouldn’t have met the love of my life who I’ve been with for going on 7 months.
Thank you for sharing. I am glad that things have turned out to be for the better, and this was only possible because you took your heartbreak as a lesson and learned from it. It's not easy but you did it. :)
My mom died 2 years ago. It was just a few weeks before her 50th birthday. I don't remember having a sustained amount of time being in denial. I do remember leaping straight towards anger. I'm usually an angry person 24/7 ha ha, but I was pretty much broken for the last year for definite. This year has been better by enlarge so it's made things a little easier.
6 dogs (3 what felt like too young and could have gone on if it wasn't for diase, one kidney failure at 5 years old and 2 to cancer at 12), 2 grandparents (when I was 18 and 26, they were 79 and 86 I'm lucky to have had all of them in my life that long) and a close family friend too young only 37 to cancer the ones I deal with the most is denial and depression I try to chanel angry into part of denial by doing literally anything but be with my own thoughts
It’s kind of weird, I have one grandparent left, all my other ones have passed away. When they died , my initial feeling was to feel numb and the different stages of grief were spaced out over a long period of time
I just lost my father in April 2024 due to Final stage kidney failure, it was very sudden because my father refuse to tell us about his condition. He ended up hospitalized and put in to ICU for a week. An hour before my father dies, he waited me and brother and he really wants us to see him before he go. 🕊️
2021, I lost a cousin due to complications of COVID19 and 2 months ago, I lost my dad due to COPD. It tore me apart. I was close to both of them. When I lost them, a part of me died as well. Now it's going on 3 years that my cousin has been gone
I just lost my mom last week and I am so sad. I cannot deal with going into the house although my mom passed in the hospital. I’m confused and lost. It happened so unexpectedly and I haven’t been the same. I’ll never will since mom was the last immediate member in my family so it’s only me. 😢
We look at psychology curriculums and at other psychological effects and then we do research on pubmed to find scientific articles that talk about this, and finally summarize the whole thing into a video and try to explain it in simpler terms, because sceintific papers are interesting, but difficult to read :p
@@sprouts It depends on how emotionally invested you are in the relationships. Also, it mainly comes down to how you cope with grief. Some people can go right into acceptance because they accept what's happened for what it is. They don't need time to process denial, anger, bargain, or depression. I've learned a lot about Stoicism from many RUclips channels. If you see the situation as just part of life, and something that happens to everybody, you see it without emotion.
Does this grief or these 5 stages of it happen only to people who have lost someone?? I mean the emotional stages of someone who has been abandoned or gone through trauma will also be same right?? I mean i feel abandoned most of the time and i thought its because that i never sought for help but it wasn't that when tried reaching out i finally realized that its true all my feeling's and I'm abandoned because few days back i was feeling so worse mentally and i reached out to my cousjn sis and asked her if she can sleep in my room ' cause i was breathing fastly and my heart's beating fast and there was my other cousins too....nobody helped me and i was sitting alone in the bathroom, having a panic attack at 3 : 00 am... And what I'm feeling is a rage to everybody who abandoned i mean I've been there for them, i tried my best but what about me?? So, my doubt is that... Is this grief too and am i going through that 'anger' stage??
@DanielOwen-ms4jg i am fair, thank you for asking. the events over the past four years have made my head and heart hurt. the cake they baked is gross, a big CON cake. and the most recent happenings with the weather, fires and wars are the thick icing on the cake that i can not bear to even taste. i wish i couldn't see the corruption but i feel it before i see it and then i go through the stages of shock, anger, sadness and then protection. i have to laugh and then move forward. i will not let the psychopaths of these CONs win. adaptation is the key to the padlock of change. How are you Daniel?
This model is outdated. There are no stages for those grieving/mourning. Tha model described above is for those who are dying. There are, however, tasks mourners experience, one of which is acceptance.
Depression causes a variety of different reactions, but it's mainly described as a state of expressing your emotions internally, it can be caused by a build up of stress of overwhelming stigma. There is nothing inherently irrational about depression, and as the Sprout video said, it's the stage where the person can "start healing", when you express your negative emotions, either to yourself, friends, or a therapist, you are thinking about the causes, which leads to acceptance of why you felt pain, and rationalizes the cause.
I lost my mother when I was 9, I am 25 years old now. I have been through 5stages of grief and this constant revisiting to find new emotions is so true and happens till now.
OMG SAME! Tho I'm 17 rn :D I remember just getting through 4th and 5th stages. I remember feeling really sad for some time but accepted it as the time went on. Now I really live like nothing happened at all. And sometimes when I think abt it for some time, I realise how messed up the situation is and despite it how I live with it Truly heartbreaking but a miracle at the same time❤ My best wishes are with you💞💞
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
After almost a decade, I am still processing the loss of my daughter's mother. It does not help that my best friend passed away back in February and so we are aiding his widow in the process.
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
Ofc it will! It will take time and energy tho as it is with all mental situations. Time heals everything. As video stated, u won't overcome it but u will learn how to live with it. My best wishes are for you❤❤
I lerned that the way people grief depends on their own mind set and on maturity. After 22 years I still am in the process and find myself in different stages. Authenticity is key. Only then ones heart can beginn to heal, at least what I learned.
I lost my oldest son to an accident Nov 22 2023 ,Just before his 29th birthday … on a Jan 2, 2024 I lost my youngest son age just after his 28th birthday to sickle cell disease… I try so hard to find normality ... and to be there for my two remaining children ; (daughters) but today I realize that I am REALLY REALLY ANGRY !!! I try to reach out for counseling but it’s been phone tag so far. I do not like this angry person in the mirror. Deep down I believe I will be ok one day but that day seems soo far away .
Ofc it will. Really hard to believe but it just will. Time will heal things one by one. I hope they rest in peace right now💞 My best wishes are for you🥺❤
I’m so sorry for your loss. My son died April 3, 2024 and a daughter February 17, 2000 and this is the hardest. I don’t know what stage I’m in. Yesterday I was bargaining. The day he died, I was angry. Praying for you.
And who is more unjust than one who invents a lie about Allah or says, “It has been inspired to me,” while nothing has been inspired to him, and one who says, “I will reveal [something] like what Allah revealed.” And if you could but see when the wrongdoers are in the overwhelming pangs of death while the angels extend their hands, [saying], “Discharge your souls! Today you will be awarded the punishment of [extreme] humiliation for what you used to say against Allah other than the truth and [that] you were, toward His verses, being arrogant.” [It will be said to them], “And you have certainly come to Us alone as We created you the first time, and you have left whatever We bestowed upon you behind you. And We do not see with you your ‘intercessors’ which you claimed that they were among you associates [of Allah]. It has [all] been severed between you, and lost from you is what you used to claim. Quran 6.93-94
Im writing a story heavily based on this topic. It's such a tough thing honestly, grief. But it must happen for us to realize what needs to be done, with the right help of course. This video is a great explanation, thank you.
When my beloved Dad died, I also lost my dearly loved mum to a home 76 miles away & the house I had known since I was 5 years old - I sat in the car & literally howled with grief...I have never felt that way before & hope that I will never feel that way again...
Ive had a very unique experience in that I seem to have only the ‘Accptance’ and a mild ‘depression’ phase. Is it possible to go through the stages and only experience a few?
Bro…. I will never give up, I miss my parents… but my younger siblings need me. It took me 8 years to get through the 5 stages, I only just watched this today. Those were really rough… I had demons along the way, but more importantly… I had angels. RIP to my parents, it’s not your fault and it’s not mine… it just is. ❤
I think the five stages of grief is a foundational model of human emotion that helped us start to understand how humans work. However, knowing what I know now in terms of neurobiology and modern psychological studies I can't help but perceive it as psychologically primitive in its explanatory potency.
I lost my mother when i was 14, and i did not go through the 5 stages of grief because i was too busy surviving. I was adopted by my moms sister who was my aunt she was abusive to me so i was surviving. life was not easy, there are a lot more happened much worse than my mothers death, but i dealt with it, because i had no choice, then i got married, he wasnt good, i had a baby, i had to survive. I am in a good place, i am happily married with 2 kids , i think those people who keep talking, or crying about the past are in self victimization stage. things happen, move on, most people go into depression and write books, if i wrote books, i would have literally a series on my life, i dont, why because its life, you look forward to your goals, take care of your loved ones, and try to make a better life for yourself and in my case for my daughter. Self victimization is a part of , branch of narcissism, i think if people really understood that, it would be easier for them to move on. I am not talking about loss of a husband or a wife, or a child, these things are not included in my explanation, i was mainly talking about the childhood, anything from childhood to teen.
I don't see self victimization as negative, I can see why someone who is hurt might want attention for it, but venting self victimization is different from using it as a priority over others, which I consider narcissism.
But this model has been pretty much abandoned by modern psychology? While it remains popular it's not really used anymore, and the only reason it remains popular is because peopl continue to promote it as though it were still relevant, which it hasn't been for some time.
Well my psychiatrist is new, 2 years, and he has explained the grief process with the five stages and so does my therapist. I’ve been a nurse for 29 years and I was taught this as well. How is grief explained now?
@@sandradavis-abby107 Well, as a starter, read the wiki entry on the five stage os grief - there's a section titled 'Criticisms'. I can't say much about what is taught where you are, but in Australia, it's not as popular and is being replaced and phased out as a bit out of date now. Also, and this is a personal view, psychiatry tends to be a very conservative and manualized profession very focussed on diagnostic categorization and, even to a certain extent, the medicalization and pathologization of normal human emotional states. A list based, step based, process orientated approach to grief may well appeal to some people but I don't find it a useful or particularly empowering or even individualized model.
I lost my son to an aggressive form of throat cancer, he was only 42 and left behind a teenage son who was badly affected by his loss. It was all over in 3 weeks despite having undergone an extensive laryngectomy 6 months earlier. A year after the event I still get effectively coshed by grief that creeps up from behind. This can be provoked by memories, objects, scents or sensations without warning. I simply break down and cry for a minute or so, wobbles I call it, at the age of 69. I have no answer to this, a grief struck father, but my colleagues at work are supportive and understanding. I do believe in an afterlife and look forward, not in fear, but in hope. All things must pass, my grief and all the suffering that fills our planet, remember those who grieve and try and support them.
I am sorry. You have a lot of strength . Be there with you.
I'm so sorry and I know that you're likely tired of hearing that but it's my most honest reaction. I have no children because of the crippling fear of outliving them. 42 is way too young I hope because I'm 42 myself. Moving on is impossible but enjoying aspects of your life post loss isn't disrespectful to your son's memory. Never forget that. =)
My deep condolences
🙏🏽
Condolences
My mother passed away due to liver failure a year ago. Although I was very quick to get back out into the world, that didn't mean I wasn't going through tremendous grief. I remember being so angry for the longest time at not only the nurses that discharged her while waiting on a transplant that never came and allowed her to come home from another state, but also at myself for not acting on my instincts fast enough when I would see her in my home for the very last time due to her body experiencing a septic shock that I had to literally beg my dad to let me call 911 in the middle of the night because he was in denial about something being seriously wrong. The worst part was that the shock initially happened early in the morning, while I was asleep, and even despite my gut telling me something was wrong, I kept ignoring it in hopes it would be wrong and that she would wake up. And when she got transferred back to the state she was initially getting care for for her transplant, I was very against it because deep down I knew that even if she survived the initial transfer, so many things could go wrong that she could catch as a result and that's exactly what happened. The stress from the transfer had a delayed response on her body, leading her to catch an infection and then resulting in her lower gi area to burst and do irreparable damage. It was literally the worst time of my life and looking back at it still makes me very depressed despite accepting the fact that she's gone.
While I mostly hid my grief from public, that didn't mean I wasn't prone to snapping. This was most common when I'd play competitive video games or if my dad needed something that I couldn't afford to get due to being the only person in my family working at that time. When I did snap, it was bad, and I do hate myself for it because I know that's not who I am as a person.
Fortunately things are starting to look up, especially now that I've been in counseling to help get through this grief. My dad is even on the right track and back working, and I'm working towards fulfilling I made to my mom nearly two years ago to complete college if anything were to happen to her. I got scholarships I'm striving towards, and I know she'd be proud at how far I've come in such a short time after this shocking and horrendous ordeal. To anyone who still has living parents that they're close to, cherish the remaining time you have with them. You'll never know when the sun will set on them and be time for them to join the stars along with millions of others who have had passed on.
I wish you all the best, man
Experiences like these are awful and soul-crushing, but the strongest people have the power to press forward and keep working toward the life they want. Your mom is proud of all the wonderful things you are doing in your education, and I'm excited to see how you overcome every trial (even though I might not in this life all things are known in the heavens :)!
God bless you🤎 Wishing the best for you
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
My dad committed suicide a month ago. My mom sent me this video, it was nice. I think I go through multiple of these stages throughout a single day and the cycle continous.
Geez...
I'm so sorry for that :< Hope he rests in peace❤
It's only a month. Time heals everything.
Just keep going. You got this :)
@@gereksizbirisiihow is he resting in peace?
I lost my dad to cancer I am only 14 and he’s going to miss so much of my life
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
My mom committed suicide on 9th June and she was my whole world. In her goodbye email she mentioned she was dealing with depression for 2 years and nobody knew about it and she hit it well.
I’ve come to this video to understand why everyone kept referring to the 5 stages. I will remember this as I battle to live one day at a time. My worst nightmare has come true. Miss you mumma. We’ll make you proud and carry your legacy forward.
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
My first true love stopped loving me. She broke up with me and quickly moved on. I loved her with all my heart and went through all the stages of grief. They weren't in that order, and I cycled through them. I ended up pushing her away as a friend because I went to her for comfort, not realizing the toll it was taking on her. I shouldn't have vented to her, but got therapy instead. She now doesn't even want to talk to me, therefore, I am now grieving our friendship.
I am so sorry. Hey, give it some time.
@@sprouts Ty Hun❤️
The person you broke up with you, you went to her for support and pushed her away as a friend? So after you broke up you befriended her, I’m confused. If you break up with me and be with someone else, you’re not going to be my friend.
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
So true, first when I lost my job and afterwards my husband in a car accident. I came out of these grief stages through yoga and meditation. I did opposite of what my heart wanted at that time, to remain alone and keep on thinking about what happened and why ? Slowly and gradually I got rid of depression but now after those terrible ten or twelve year, I can easily spend my time alone without over thinking and going into depression. Thank God.
I lost my hubby last year (he was only 38, I'm 34)...I remember going numb, I just shot down for about 2 weeks - just to funeral. And after that I couldn't just stay home and look at all his stuff so I went to work, more hours and 2 additional side jobs helped me a lot. I got rid of the things that was in my eye view and just day by day I got better. i remember anger and despair but it was short period. I must admit that I was taking antidepresants for half year, didn't go through any therapy, just healed myself with work and being around people :)
Lost my hubby last year, here i am still crying everyday. 11 years of marriage no babies feel so empty.
@@jomalinsdiary9373 Just don't give up, treat yourself gently and give yourself time to heal 💐 Peace will eventually come I promise. The memories of him will never disappear but they will become more joyful. He was big part of your life 🌹 I wrote my comment more than 5 months ago and one week after I found out I'm being pregnant with my first child 😱 how? I have PCOS and type 1 diabetes, heard many time that I will never be a mother. We were trying for many years and I guess it was just not meant to be. I'm not religious, but it was someones finger there 💐 so.. Don't you ever give up, life is out there and it can be beautiful ❤️❤️❤️
@@jomalinsdiary9373 don't give up 💐 treat yourself gently and give yourself more time to heal, the peace will come I promise ❤️ He was a big part of your life, the memories of him will never disappear but will become more joyful 💐 I wrote my comment more than 5 months ago and one week after I found out that I'm pregnant with my first child 😱 how? I have PCOS and type 1 diabetes and heard many times that I will never be a mother. We were trying for many years but I guess it was just not meant to be. I'm not religious but I feel like it was someones finger there. So.. Don't you ever give up! Life is out there and can be beautiful ❤️❤️❤️🌹🌹🌹
@@jomalinsdiary9373 Don't give up..just treat yourself kindly and give yourself more time to heal.❤ He was a big part of your life. The memories of him will never disappear but will become more joyful I promise! 💐I wrote my comment more than 5 months ago and after maybe a week I found out I was pregnant with my new partner! I was in shock because i have PCOS and type 1 diabetes and heard many times I will never be a mother...but here I am! So...don't you dare to give up, life is out there and it can be bautiful 🌹🌹🌹Don't isolate and think positive, the change will come 🌼
@@jomalinsdiary9373 Don't give up..just treat yourself kindly and give yourself more time to heal.❤ He was a big part of your life. The memories of him will never disappear but will become more joyful I promise! 💐I wrote my comment more than 5 months ago and after maybe a week I found out I was pregnant with my new partner! I was in shock because i have PCOS and type 1 diabetes and heard many times I will never be a mother...but here I am! So...don't you dare to give up, life is out there and it can be bautiful 🌹🌹🌹Don't isolate and think positive, the change will come 🌼
Ive managed to be in denial for more than 1 month. Grief is something
It feels like I keep going through all the stages every time. Hope time heals.
This is so true. I lost my grandma when i was 15 (she raised me), i literally went through all the stages. At first, i was in shock, i couldn't believe it. And then i was so angry at everything, at God at my parents, myself, the universe. I was angry that death exists. I was resenting everyone who is alive. Then i was trying to make sense of the whole thing. I tried to convince myself i could see her again. I would try to convince myself my dreams were real that it was really her or i would try to believe you can reserve death somehow. I tried to find logical, scientific facts that could prove I could see her again (i know i sound insane). And I realized no... so the depression started. I didnt talk to people, i couldnt eat. All i did was lying in her bed. I would smell her clothes to have clear memories and cry and cry. But finally I understood. I realized there is nothing i could do but accept.
Its been 20 years since she is gone. I miss her so much, the pain of losing her never disappears but it is manageable. To everyone out there dealing with the loss of a loved one, i wish you all the strength in the world. ❤️
Thanks for sharing
I lost one of my best friends three days ago. I have been stably on the stage of depression. I miss her so much and I know life will never be the same without her.
It's nature when we lose our friends, or our member of family. When you have been after two weeks deprission you can make a session with a psychologist.
@@naqibullahmirzad3102 thank you. I have been into psychotherapy already for many years.
I am sure the bond was one of the most beautiful things in your life. It'll continue to be. Take care. Be there with you.
My deep condolences
@@briannafogelson249thank you 🌹
Soo true, your content is well researched & informative
Thanks for sharing the great work👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
That's a wonderful compliment! Thank you :)
All this time i thought i was going crazy but apparently i was grieving my older circumstances/older self
"They say there are 5 stages of grief - denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Well, I’d like to add one more... Revenge." - Cruella (Emma Stone)
Some may go through revenge but not all depending on one's own nature and type of grief one gone through.
That’s not a part of the process. The Bible says vengeance isHis
I lost my daughter father and she is the only reason I'm alive rn but I don't know how long I can go. I was already suffering from depression so it triggered it and I'm feeling to die I don't have anyone to talk or help me I think my end is coming.I can't eat much even with a tonic I'm just checking out without much effort.
I'll be praying for you. He gives his strongest soldiers the hardest battles to prepare us for VICTORY. Iknow it's hard I've been at the bottom. Now I'm here talking to you. May you and your family have a blessed night.
Currently going into my senior year of college, when I was a freshman I had my first ever girlfriend. Being that she was my first, I jumped head first with my feelings into that relationship and got my heart broken after about a month. I went through these exact stages of grief which lasted about three months which was excruciatingly painful but was necessary for me to grow and mature as a person. Even after those three months of grieving and I was over her, there would still moments here and there where she crossed my mind and when it first happened it would make me feel sad. It rarely happens now but when it does it actually makes me feel happy because if I hadn’t gotten my heart broken by her, I wouldn’t have met the love of my life who I’ve been with for going on 7 months.
Thank you for sharing. I am glad that things have turned out to be for the better, and this was only possible because you took your heartbreak as a lesson and learned from it. It's not easy but you did it. :)
My mom died 2 years ago. It was just a few weeks before her 50th birthday. I don't remember having a sustained amount of time being in denial. I do remember leaping straight towards anger. I'm usually an angry person 24/7 ha ha, but I was pretty much broken for the last year for definite. This year has been better by enlarge so it's made things a little easier.
6 dogs (3 what felt like too young and could have gone on if it wasn't for diase, one kidney failure at 5 years old and 2 to cancer at 12), 2 grandparents (when I was 18 and 26, they were 79 and 86 I'm lucky to have had all of them in my life that long) and a close family friend too young only 37 to cancer the ones I deal with the most is denial and depression I try to chanel angry into part of denial by doing literally anything but be with my own thoughts
It’s kind of weird, I have one grandparent left, all my other ones have passed away. When they died , my initial feeling was to feel numb and the different stages of grief were spaced out over a long period of time
Love your videos
We love you!
I just lost my father in April 2024 due to Final stage kidney failure, it was very sudden because my father refuse to tell us about his condition. He ended up hospitalized and put in to ICU for a week. An hour before my father dies, he waited me and brother and he really wants us to see him before he go. 🕊️
I “just” lost my first job but I feel like the grief stages are mostly the similar… But I feel like I stuck in depression period….
Losing a job and a cold isn’t anywhere close to being the same. I have lost both and it’s no comparison, because I can get a job, but not my son.
@@sandradavis-abby107 Agree, I know it’s not the same! But it was interesting for me how similar the stages were (for me)
Sorry for your son
I just lost my dad and I'm not sure where or what to be feeling. He was abusive but all I'm feeling is mixed up
2021, I lost a cousin due to complications of COVID19 and 2 months ago, I lost my dad due to COPD. It tore me apart. I was close to both of them. When I lost them, a part of me died as well. Now it's going on 3 years that my cousin has been gone
I just lost my mom last week and I am so sad. I cannot deal with going into the house although my mom passed in the hospital. I’m confused and lost. It happened so unexpectedly and I haven’t been the same. I’ll never will since mom was the last immediate member in my family so it’s only me. 😢
Idk why but i always wonder around the bargaining and acceptance. I rarely get dipressed over any loss.
I found my dad dead in his bed last Monday. I’m in the anger and depression stage. I miss him so incredibly much.
Please tell me from where / which books you refer to learn this kind of physiology
We look at psychology curriculums and at other psychological effects and then we do research on pubmed to find scientific articles that talk about this, and finally summarize the whole thing into a video and try to explain it in simpler terms, because sceintific papers are interesting, but difficult to read :p
Lost my mother 3 month ago.
Now stage 4
Not everyone feels each stage. This is just a generalization.
Maybe
@@sprouts It depends on how emotionally invested you are in the relationships.
Also, it mainly comes down to how you cope with grief. Some people can go right into acceptance because they accept what's happened for what it is. They don't need time to process denial, anger, bargain, or depression.
I've learned a lot about Stoicism from many RUclips channels. If you see the situation as just part of life, and something that happens to everybody, you see it without emotion.
My stage of grief is hate depression hate regret acceptance
Does this grief or these 5 stages of it happen only to people who have lost someone?? I mean the emotional stages of someone who has been abandoned or gone through trauma will also be same right?? I mean i feel abandoned most of the time and i thought its because that i never sought for help but it wasn't that when tried reaching out i finally realized that its true all my feeling's and I'm abandoned because few days back i was feeling so worse mentally and i reached out to my cousjn sis and asked her if she can sleep in my room ' cause i was breathing fastly and my heart's beating fast and there was my other cousins too....nobody helped me and i was sitting alone in the bathroom, having a panic attack at 3 : 00 am... And what I'm feeling is a rage to everybody who abandoned i mean I've been there for them, i tried my best but what about me??
So, my doubt is that... Is this grief too and am i going through that 'anger' stage??
Losing is my life. So, I'm well experienced in it. I don't suffer under clinical depression. But I'm really depressed. Why? Watch the world...
Lost my mom in 2018nov. Yeah, i went through five stages and frequently i visit stage 4
can we reduce the time of healing by fooling our brain or thinking like we dont belong to them?
Good
These are the exact 5 stages 👌
Step one hold in step two go to my room and cry step three except step four cry agan
the one dislike is from someone that has gone through grief and depression
shock
anger
sadness
and then protection
@DanielOwen-ms4jg i am fair, thank you for asking. the events over the past four years have made my head and heart hurt. the cake they baked is gross, a big CON cake. and the most recent happenings with the weather, fires and wars are the thick icing on the cake that i can not bear to even taste. i wish i couldn't see the corruption but i feel it before i see it and then i go through the stages of shock, anger, sadness and then protection. i have to laugh and then move forward. i will not let the psychopaths of these CONs win. adaptation is the key to the padlock of change.
How are you Daniel?
This model is outdated. There are no stages for those grieving/mourning. Tha model described above is for those who are dying. There are, however, tasks mourners experience, one of which is acceptance.
❤
Is depression considered an inability to rationalise the situation?
Depression causes a variety of different reactions, but it's mainly described as a state of expressing your emotions internally, it can be caused by a build up of stress of overwhelming stigma. There is nothing inherently irrational about depression, and as the Sprout video said, it's the stage where the person can "start healing", when you express your negative emotions, either to yourself, friends, or a therapist, you are thinking about the causes, which leads to acceptance of why you felt pain, and rationalizes the cause.
ignorance helps 😥
My name is kevin I lost my dog
uga buga
all the 4 stages happen every week and the final nver comes
I don't like the idea. Since it's the primary way we discount religious people's grief response.
You dig up graves, too?
Save innocent families from being a victim of american-israel brutality, free Palestine. Hands off Jerusalem.
Yes.. When I lost my Mother and Anuty. 🥲
Sorry for the loss. Take care
I lost my mother when I was 9, I am 25 years old now. I have been through 5stages of grief and this constant revisiting to find new emotions is so true and happens till now.
OMG SAME!
Tho I'm 17 rn :D
I remember just getting through 4th and 5th stages. I remember feeling really sad for some time but accepted it as the time went on. Now I really live like nothing happened at all. And sometimes when I think abt it for some time, I realise how messed up the situation is and despite it how I live with it
Truly heartbreaking but a miracle at the same time❤
My best wishes are with you💞💞
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
After almost a decade, I am still processing the loss of my daughter's mother. It does not help that my best friend passed away back in February and so we are aiding his widow in the process.
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
my dad passed away this year in may from cancer and still trying to process everything. It’s weird seeing he’s not here anymore
He will always be in your memories ❤️
My dad passed away on Feb 29 th and right now I’m still in the this doesn’t make any sense stage.. I’m grieving it comes in waves 😭
I would recommend the grief recovery handbook. Very good information in there. It's a purple book published by the grief and loss institute. Worth a read.
I lost my mom 1 month ago, i am so lost. I feel so many things in my body, i am full of stress. Hopefully one day i can be ok again
Ofc it will! It will take time and energy tho as it is with all mental situations.
Time heals everything. As video stated, u won't overcome it but u will learn how to live with it.
My best wishes are for you❤❤
I lerned that the way people grief depends on their own mind set and on maturity. After 22 years I still am in the process and find myself in different stages. Authenticity is key. Only then ones heart can beginn to heal, at least what I learned.
I lost my oldest son to an accident Nov 22 2023 ,Just before his 29th birthday … on a Jan 2, 2024 I lost my youngest son age just after his 28th birthday to sickle cell disease… I try so hard to find normality ... and to be there for my two remaining children ; (daughters) but today I realize that I am REALLY REALLY ANGRY !!! I try to reach out for counseling but it’s been phone tag so far. I do not like this angry person in the mirror. Deep down I believe I will be ok one day but that day seems soo far away .
Ofc it will. Really hard to believe but it just will. Time will heal things one by one.
I hope they rest in peace right now💞
My best wishes are for you🥺❤
I’m so sorry for your loss. My son died April 3, 2024 and a daughter February 17, 2000 and this is the hardest. I don’t know what stage I’m in. Yesterday I was bargaining. The day he died, I was angry. Praying for you.
@@sandradavis-abby107 thank you and i will pray for you .and. for EVERY parent that has to endure this
i know a LOT of people will agree with me , when i say that its techno that im grieving over.
Yeah interesting.
And who is more unjust than one who invents a lie about Allah or says, “It has been inspired to me,” while nothing has been inspired to him, and one who says, “I will reveal [something] like what Allah revealed.” And if you could but see when the wrongdoers are in the overwhelming pangs of death while the angels extend their hands, [saying], “Discharge your souls! Today you will be awarded the punishment of [extreme] humiliation for what you used to say against Allah other than the truth and [that] you were, toward His verses, being arrogant.”
[It will be said to them], “And you have certainly come to Us alone as We created you the first time, and you have left whatever We bestowed upon you behind you. And We do not see with you your ‘intercessors’ which you claimed that they were among you associates [of Allah]. It has [all] been severed between you, and lost from you is what you used to claim.
Quran 6.93-94
When i am grieving, my personal order is:
1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Depression
4. Bargaining
5. Acceptance
It's uncanny how I did go through those five stages after a woman I thought I was going to marry left me for another man.
I just lost my beta fish. He lived to 4 years. I’m in a state of shock right now. RIP blueberry
Im writing a story heavily based on this topic. It's such a tough thing honestly, grief. But it must happen for us to realize what needs to be done, with the right help of course. This video is a great explanation, thank you.
I wonder, how do these stages apply to marital infidelity?? I would appreciate your comments
I feel this can be translated into trauma. I guess when we experience trauma we have experienced grief from a loss of the total self.
When my beloved Dad died, I also lost my dearly loved mum to a home 76 miles away & the house I had known since I was 5 years old - I sat in the car & literally howled with grief...I have never felt that way before & hope that I will never feel that way again...
My sister and best friend left the family and I turned to drugs to avoid that reality… I’ve now healed but it took 4 years
Ive had a very unique experience in that I seem to have only the ‘Accptance’ and a mild ‘depression’ phase. Is it possible to go through the stages and only experience a few?
people deal with grief in their own ways so yes it is very possible; it depends on the person. I hope you’re doing well.
Bro…. I will never give up, I miss my parents… but my younger siblings need me. It took me 8 years to get through the 5 stages, I only just watched this today. Those were really rough… I had demons along the way, but more importantly… I had angels. RIP to my parents, it’s not your fault and it’s not mine… it just is. ❤
😿👍
I only need acceptance
Hope you get it :)
5 stages:
Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance
i just smoke weed
You’re in denial that’s why you’re smoking weed
" I had to learn to balance,my acceptance".
I think the five stages of grief is a foundational model of human emotion that helped us start to understand how humans work. However, knowing what I know now in terms of neurobiology and modern psychological studies I can't help but perceive it as psychologically primitive in its explanatory potency.
Fair enough!
I lost my mother when i was 14, and i did not go through the 5 stages of grief because i was too busy surviving. I was adopted by my moms sister who was my aunt she was abusive to me so i was surviving. life was not easy, there are a lot more happened much worse than my mothers death, but i dealt with it, because i had no choice, then i got married, he wasnt good, i had a baby, i had to survive. I am in a good place, i am happily married with 2 kids , i think those people who keep talking, or crying about the past are in self victimization stage. things happen, move on, most people go into depression and write books, if i wrote books, i would have literally a series on my life, i dont, why because its life, you look forward to your goals, take care of your loved ones, and try to make a better life for yourself and in my case for my daughter. Self victimization is a part of , branch of narcissism, i think if people really understood that, it would be easier for them to move on. I am not talking about loss of a husband or a wife, or a child, these things are not included in my explanation, i was mainly talking about the childhood, anything from childhood to teen.
I don't see self victimization as negative, I can see why someone who is hurt might want attention for it, but venting self victimization is different from using it as a priority over others, which I consider narcissism.
When my grandma past away i skipped the whole stages of grief instead immediently accepting it
She didn't mean anything to you then, you ain't tough or special. Goofy ass kid.
But this model has been pretty much abandoned by modern psychology? While it remains popular it's not really used anymore, and the only reason it remains popular is because peopl continue to promote it as though it were still relevant, which it hasn't been for some time.
Well my psychiatrist is new, 2 years, and he has explained the grief process with the five stages and so does my therapist. I’ve been a nurse for 29 years and I was taught this as well. How is grief explained now?
@@sandradavis-abby107 Well, as a starter, read the wiki entry on the five stage os grief - there's a section titled 'Criticisms'. I can't say much about what is taught where you are, but in Australia, it's not as popular and is being replaced and phased out as a bit out of date now. Also, and this is a personal view, psychiatry tends to be a very conservative and manualized profession very focussed on diagnostic categorization and, even to a certain extent, the medicalization and pathologization of normal human emotional states. A list based, step based, process orientated approach to grief may well appeal to some people but I don't find it a useful or particularly empowering or even individualized model.