When I was struggling after my (very planned, very wanted) first born arrived, my mother said "you don't have to love him now - what has he done so far other than make you tired and sad? Just be patient and the love will come." Best advice I have ever gotten. The first six weeks were rough and then it all came together.
Melania Cannon Also, postpartum depression is very real. Even if someone doesn’t have it to the extent of it affecting their day to day life, it could still make you not feel very close to your baby. I like your mom’s statement though, it’s very true. You might love them cause they’re your kid, doesn’t mean you have to always like them.
I love this SO much. I had trouble bonding after a hard pregnancy & probably postpartum depression. I remember sitting up in the hospital during rare quiet moments just holding him. This advice is what every mom should share with daughters. 💜
😃 my mother was told she was in menopause by her doctor at 46. My parents moved across the country and when they arrived my mom didn't feel right. 7 MONTHS PREGNANT! How could she not know?!?! Last of 11 kids so......
@@vwgirl My mum was 47 when she had me, found out she was pregnant at 6 months, she still fit into her normal clothes they had gone on holiday and found out when she got back cause she "felt a bit under the weather"
Dr Mike: Chest compressions chest compressions chest compressions Dr mama jones: pregnancy test pregnancy test pregnancy is test Legal eagle: bailiff will tackle you
I knew someone who let their 6 yr old name the baby. It was cute. Dashal or something fun and cute. I asked my 6 yr old what she'd name a baby. "Sparkle, glitter, dertorder(said with an unspellable fake spanish accent)"
My mom named my sister Joy because she was in labor for a long time and the baby finally was born at sunrise and there's a Bible verse like "Joy comes in the morning." She let my older sisters name me and couldn't remember what name they chose when I was born so there's a part in my birth video where she's like "What's her name again??"
Heather Meredith my older brother named my younger brother Harry, after Harry and the Bucket Full of Dinosaurs (book series/tv show) and everyone thought he was named after Harry Potter, because the books were this new phenomenon at the time, but it was really my 5/6 year old brother loved a book series about a little boy with a bucket full of size changing dinosaurs. It’s quite sweet
I know a woman that was older when she had her baby so she named him Walker. It was an exaggeration but she said 'I'm going to need one ( a walker) when I see him graduate high school.'
It makes me think of a picture I saw on Facebook about how to bond with your baby and it has "X NO" beside a picture of a mom and baby sitting at a table with coffee 🤣
"Well, I like long warm baths, not a fan of broccoli (made everything shaky inside, not fun), and love orange juice.. sorry for the cravings, lol... BTW, where are dad and big sis,"
Which is absolutely terrifying. So glad that salpingectomy is the new standard! I'm much more comfortable knowing that the failure rate for the surgery I had is so low, that for the only case I could find where someone documented it failing, they also wrote that they believe it was the only instance of failure ever on record. That's a BARELY low enough chance of pregnancy for me!
My sister had a "Tubal baby" baby after tubal. She found out at 20 weeks. My niece was born end of Sept. They named her Autumn Grace because she was born in Autumn by the Grace of God. My sister said when she told the guy who did her epidural that this was a tubal baby, he asked who the doctor was that did her tubal and when she told him, the guy turned white as a ghost. When asked what was wrong, he said "He did my wife's tubal🤣🤣🤣
Ah, this show has been the source of so much paranoia for me. Me: Oh, period started. Nothing to worry about. Brain: But what if your uterus is full of lies?
Honestly I think a lot of people in these are just in denial. There has been 1 that I saw that I believed she didn't have any signs of pregnancy, but she had 3 young kids and knew what pregnancy felt like for her.
My siblings and i were all born on failed contraception. I was the condom. 1st brother (8 yrs after me) was the shot. Sister (9 yrs after me) was the pill. 2nd brother (11 yrs after me) was a combo of pill, shot, and religious condom use. In a span of 4 years, my mom used preventive methods and *they all failed* . She was pissed every time and to this day goes on a rant when it's brought up.
ScorBug92 I know a man that got a vasectomy after they had one baby and he was supposedly sterile but his wife got pregnant. He somehow grew back together so he got fixed again and then along came baby number 2, supposedly fixed again then he had another baby. You might think his wife was cheating but all four little boys looked exactly like him so there was no denying they were his. He finally stopped having children.
Kristen Gill who said anything about hormones ??? We were discussing birth control period Please stop just stop I responded to a funny comment ur making this into something bigger So I am finished responding don’t have a lot of time to spend on this
Kristen Gill that’s not entirely correct. my best friend got an IUD to stop her period, but still took the pill so that she had extra pregnancy protection if anything were to happen to her IUD.
OH MY LORD if I did the math right, she had only a .02% chance of getting pregnant and leaving the hospital with a healthy baby! Miracle child right there!
you need to consider though that the 0,8% are usually "the number of women using this contraceptive who do get pregnant", especially considering most people with tubal ligation are at least over 30 this already factors in a "general" probability of pregnancy of maybe 10% (just guessing here). So the odds would be more like 0.1-0,2%. Still low, but not quite as low
I think it happens a lot more than people realize. My husband was expecting that feeling and was really thrown off when it didn't happen. It made his transition to parenthood harder, but I think knowing that that only happens to some people would have helped.
It happened to me too, although I díd feel an enormous responsibility for my baby and was pretty proud that she was mý baby. I just didn't have the 'I'm in love with my baby right away'-feeling. The feeling had to grow. Right now, 6 years later, I have a really close bond with my daughter and love her to bits. She's a real mommy's girl now. I will probably have the same with my next child (which I will expect in less than 2 weeks).
I had ppd... it was hard for me. I thought breastfeeding would help, but it didn’t. When I stopped breastfeeding, at 10 months, I think is when it started getting better.
As a person who didn't feel that way, I feel so bad for people who do. One of my dearest friends had a really hard time w/ baby #5 (yes, she chose to have that many & more) and she thought she was going crazy because it hadn't happened before. Kudos to moms who hang in there
Our family had a similar addition. Momma had her bits taken care of after four kiddos. Many years later, here comes starry eyed Anna. Momma went into the office of the doctor that performed her tubal ligation carrying a newborn and told the Dr. that he was paying for her college tuition. And he did. Anna is now in her 20’s and has graduated college.
Please watch the Dr. Phil episode about the women who believe they are pregnant for like 5+ YEARS. I think they call it a cryptic pregnancy. I don’t have a clue how someone could actually believe this. I’d love to see an OB Reacts about it.
No she’s right thats what the women call it. They’re using the term wrong which is pointed out several times throughout the show. They’re so stuck on the idea that they’re pregnant and that the doctors are wrong because so it can’t be a phantom pregnancy, that they depend on a word they found online with the wrong definition that they believe they can be pregnant for several years.
My grandpa was a doctor - he retired in the 1980s - and he once had a patient come in complaining of a moving mass in her stomach. She called it a "tentacular cancer" and wanted it removed. She was 8 months pregnant
I'm reminded of an episode of Malcolm in the Middle where the mom was upset because she didn't like her new baby. At the end the dad says, "Wow, I guess it has been too long. You've hated all of our babies. After a while, you're going to love that baby as much as anyone has ever loved a baby, but it won't happen right away. Reese took a few months, but he was a nipple-biter, so I get it..." Wasn't counting on that show to talk about a real thing that happens. Maybe I should go re-watch it.
Makes sense i had my son who couldn't latch properly it didn't matter how i held him he caused pain and my nipples to bleed, plus i also had a bad tear to heal from so of course i am fustrated and upset bust once i swapped to baby bottles and was expressing into those bottles i was much more happier
@@omomo202 my son no matter how i placed him would not be able to latch properly my nipples bled, and were very sore i couldn't even wear a bra, no material one either thats how sore i was
My middle name is “Hope” because my mom had 2 miscarriages in 10 years between my other two sisters and had me at 45. I was her last “Hope” to have a baby. And I really like my name story and thought it was worth sharing :)
@@RedRoseSeptember22 Are you saying god controls individual sperm to fertilise an individual woman's egg as a "trick" but can't stop individual babies dying from diseases or other complications?
My mom told me that when she first saw me after i was born she started screaming "OH MY GOD MY BABY'S A CONEHEAD!!" to my grandma and a room full of doctors and nurses
Hi I'm a math nerd, and going by the percentage chances you gave in the video (I've taken 3-5% chance of spontaneous pregnancy as 4% for the calculation), and the chance of this situation happening is 0.016%, or 1 in 6250
Just a Nerd dang. Ok I'm coming for some comfort. Got pregnant on depo, pill, and I just had 2 babies in the last 2 years. I also have a 17 year old. Life's weird y'all. Hold on for the ride. I love her advice at the end.
My first reaction for my first was "oh my. he's not that cute?!" I mean he was bloody and cheesy and slightly blue. Then I felt awful because I didn't have that starry eyed feeling. But once he was cleaned up and I was holding him the love and protectiveness went into overdrive where I didn't even want his father to hold him yet.
My son was a week overdue and weighed 9 pounds 5 1/2 ounces at birth. He was 22 inches long and his cheeks went down to his chest- no neck. He was enormous and not at all cute yet. That took a while:) Not all babies are beautiful, not even to their mamas. I loved him from the start but I'm a realist. Incidentally, he was a first for the hospital I went to in several ways. He was their biggest baby since the hospital had opened about 40 years before. He was the first baby in the new delivery room set up to resemble a bedroom instead of an operating room. They had built two nurseries but he was the first to be put in the second. It was a baby boom and the second nursery, up to that point, had only ever been used for storage. He became a mini-celebrity at that hospital and drew a crowd when I brought him in for asthma at 5 months. Everyone had to come see him. It was so strange.
I feel like that will be me hahah When I imagine things to see how i will feel i know for sure thats how i'm gonna react haha. Im currently pregnant with my first cx I dont know how its gonna go, but oof, I'm defidently gonna prepare myself for it hahahah
If I ever have kids (doubtful), I see my self telling him/her in a sing song voice how ugly they are 😝 Most newborns look like little aliens and I wish we would acknowledge this as a society 😆
@@heatherfoster2497 like seriously.. i was born a month too early, so apparently I had this weird fatty layer on my skin for like a few weeks? And my mom straight out says I was the weirdest, disgusting creature she had ever seen when I was born... but I was about 2800 grams, so pretty small, and when we left the hospital I weighed 2600 grams. So when my mom went shopping at the store, she would just place me in the basket with the groceries, cus I was so small and light 🙄🙄. There is a meme of a kid (about 3-5yrs old maybe) with a horrible 90's bangs etc being angry while shaking a hairbrush, my mom genuinely thought that was something my sister had found from when I was around that age... I had cute moments, but like... the haircuts sure messed up my cuteness too 🙄. I was not a pretty child nor newborn lmaooo
@@heatherfoster2497 My nephew was very late so he had “old man skin” and pictures of him with his big eyes had him making claw-like pointing jestures. So I said he looked like E.T.. Boy did I get in trouble for that. 🤭
This is so similar to my mums story, my mum had a “tubes tied” following 2 difficult pregnancy’s with my sisters, 13 years later, periods stopped, weight gain... but had negative pregnancy test. Doctors told her she potentially had a cyst? Had a ultrasound and the doctor said “welp, your cyst has arms and legs” she was 6 months along at this point. They theorised that her operation could have reversed due to a slipped disc that was being treated with traction? Who knows if that’s what happened, but I’m still nicknamed Peggy, as she slipped her disc by bending down to get a clothes peg she dropped.
Aw my daughter's name is Zoey too (except with a Y on the end) because she gave me life and a reason to keep on living. Plus it's just a really pretty name.
My Mom had a tubal ligation after 3 kids. She was supposed to go back for a test, but we were moving, so it didn't happen. She discovered she was pregnant a few months later, and had my little sister. She always nagged me and my siblings about how easy it was to get pregnant, even if you've had your tubes tied.
When I was still a student nurse, one of my labor patients was in her early 40s and had a tubal ligation. Evidently, she was pregnant when her tubes were tied. This was like 1981 and at home pregnancy tests were not as sensitive then but were quite expensive.
That happened to me. Four kids under five. Got my tubes cut, tied, and burned. I got pregnant. I've always told my kids how easy it is to get pregnant! Uggh!
I am not a mother (yet) but my mum has always said "At first your baby is a stranger that you really want to be friends with but you just haven't gotten to know yet" glad to know that other mothers have thought the same thing
Sailor Larien I can’t imagine feeling that way.. i have been so attached to my daughter since she was born she never felt like a stranger to me.. she literally grew inside of me! I don’t need to be “friends” with her lol I’m her mama and she loves me and I love her! Since day one
There’s a reason why doctors jokingly call it “tubal litigation”. I got pregnant a year after I had a tubal ligation, even though my OBGYN said, her words, I was tied and fried and it would a miracle if I got pregnant again. Well. The miracle happened, but unfortunately it didn’t stick. I had miscarriage in the bathroom while getting an ultrasound to make certain there was no ectopic pregnancy. Talk about emotional turmoil. Freaked by an unwanted pregnancy on one day, and in agonized grief over the loss of it the next. Hormones never help in these situations.
My mom sadly went through the same thing. She started having weird cravings and my sister and I picked up on it and asked if she was pregnant again. She said yes. We were all so excited and surprised because she had her tubes clamped I believe. Sadly pretty soon after she told us the good news and was forced to tell us the tragic news. She had a miscarriage. We were devastated. I honestly still am 😅 I still think about my sibling in heaven. I think it was so hard on my mom she never really talked about it again. I think a piece of her heart was lost the day she miscarried. I'm sorry for your loss it's a very tragic thing so many women go through. I wish no one had to go through this
Unfortunately? Odd choice of words for someone who made a decision to never have kids again. I'm so confused. I'm not being a jerk but i really can't grasp the mixed emotions.
@@ems7623 it's really not an odd choice of words though. It is unfortunate when we loose a baby doesn't matter what the circumstances are it's 99.9% of the time always a tragedy that we feel very deeply even if the pregnancy was unwanted. Just because we don't want the baby doesn't mean we don't want to birth the baby and give it up for adoption. We don't know the circumstances so we cannot judge. And by the way there's multiple reasons for someone to have such a procedure and some of them are actually medical reasons. My mom for example had to do this procedure because of her health (not exactly sure as she never talked much about it but it was something due to her health) well she fell pregnant with my step dad. The first two months went fine. She was shocked, confused but happy. She was feeling a mix of emotions which were normal. She lost the baby and it was devastating to all of us, especially my mom, so much so she has never spoken about it since the loss. Not a word. It hurt her so badly to lose that baby. So in My opinion using unfortunately is not an odd thing to say. It is unfortunate when we loose our babies. Especially when we haven't even been given the time to wrap our heads around the fact we are pregnant before we loose the baby.
@@ems7623 I had two previous stillborn babies, one at full term, the other at 28 weeks, ten months apart. Having another baby a year later with medical intervention was terrifying, but successful. After that, having birthed two live children (losing the two in between), I was done with that part of my life. Getting pregnant after having my tubes tied was not in the plan. But discovering I was pregnant again was both terrifying (at first) and then devastating when I lost it. Also, hormones don’t help with emotions around these kinds of life altering events. Hope that clears up any confusion.
You can not begin to understand how happy I am to have stumbled across this channel. I'm a fourth-year medical student, and I just finished my Ob/Gyn rotation a couple of months ago, and, it was one of the most wonderful experiences of my life. This comment is probably arbitrary on the platform of the RUclips comment section, but I wanted you, Mama Doctor Jones, to know just how much respect I have for you and what you do. The Ob/Gyn I worked with was a young mom, and let me tell you, seeing her crush it as an obstetrician, gynecologist, and surgeon, while also fulfilling the role of a mother of two kids, was the most awe-inspiring things I've ever witnessed. To all the laypeople out there, if you've ever met a female ObGyn who is also raising a family, then you've met a real-life superhero, because it is a feat to do either well, and superhuman to do both well. That was long-winded, but Mama Doctor Jones, I hope you know that you're a special kind of person and I love your channel. Keep being your wonderful self (:
I had, what the doctor called, a complete sterilization at 28 years old. I got pregnant at 46 and carried her 5 months before I lost her. They said I had extremely high protein levels in my blood. To this day, I still don't know what that meant and how it pertained to my miscarriage. It was heartbreaking, but I felt something was off from day one, so I never told anyone I was pregnant. I'm a bigger girl, so I got by with it. I finally broke down and told my daughter when I turned 50. To this day, she's the only one that knows.
I know this is long after your comment, but I am so sorry this happened. High protein could mean pre-eclampsia where the blood pressure goes up rapidly and can affect other organs. It happens after 20 weeks and can be dangerous for baby and Mom. They don't know the cause but it could be from blood exchange from baby. Again, so sorry, your doctor should have explained. 🥰
@@personincognito3989 as much as I love that you are sharing this on EVERY post like a troll, not everyone does and that's okay, I'd even argue maybe it's a bad idea to love them immediately because that would make it all the more devastating if you miscarry.
@@teresahowick5197 Chester I did watch it. I'm giving a comment in regards to people saying it took a while for them to love them. But you've taken it as a judgment somehow?
@@gracehaven5459 no dear I'm not being a troll I'm commenting on whatever the f*** I want cuz this is social media and I can do that. But you've taken it as a judgment. Nor do I care what some stranger of any age or any given country thinks about my comment on social media.
My grandma had my father at 47, when she already had a 14 y.o. daughter. The shocker is that it was planned and wanted. Rural Spain in the 60s, in the middle of a fascist dictatorship, priest said that there needed to be more children in town so... They got to work!
My mother was 45 and my father 51 when I was born. I was planned and wanted (second marriage, dad never had kids before). I hate ppl asking if someone was an accident. It drove my mom crazy!
Julia Gallego My grandmother had my dad in 1925 and she was 46 years old. She got married at 39 and had her first baby a girl at age 42. Can you imagine? No fertility help it just happened and both children were healthy and my Dad lived till age 93 and his sister lived to 92. My daughter had a baby at 46 but it did require fertility doctors and high risk ob’s.
I'm 8 years younger than my aunt. Who's 16 years younger than my mom. Definitely a surprise. Only learned recently that my brother was a surprise. He came 4 years after my sister. Apparently my dad got himself "fixed" once they knew my mom was pregnant and even before my brother arrived.
My husband was the oh shit baby. His mom was 46 and Dad was 56. They already had 10 kids. The youngest was already 10. Her tubes were tied. She thought she was going through menopause a little early. Went to the family doctor for tests and a check up. The doctor came back in and said "oh shit Ruby, you're pregnant!"
My granny had a case of "menopause with a heartbeat", when she was 44. Luckily for me, though, as I probably wouldn't have been born without my mother 😅
I loved my son when he was born, but I wasn't starry eyed in love either. That took time for me. I needed to bond and get to know this little person who just tore me apart 😂
Also, I sometimes feel like it's not ok to say I gave birth to her, when she was cut out of me. I didn't get to experience the miracle of birth, I just fell asleep and woke up in ICU without her in my belly. And the fact that I didn't get to see her until 36 hours later, longest hours ever, might have something to do with delayed bonding.
I feel like a lot of these "I don't get why she didn't go see a doctor" can be explained with the fact that the show is from USA. Unlike almost every other country in the world, seeing the doctor, even for something like this, could be an extreme strain on the household finances. And that's even with medical insurance. So I can totally see why many would choose not to see a doctor, especially when they've had a medical procedure performed that should make it 99.91% impossible to get pregnant. How many would toss the equivalent of a month's worth of food out just to find out if they are part of the 0.09% that slipped through the cracks?
This is a very good point! And it’s usually a combination of financial reasons and the massive inconvenience of having to take time off because the doctors offices are usually closed at 5-6 pm and not open on the weekends!
That's what I was thinking. I'm not from the US and am so fortunate to live somewhere with free healthcare, but I've looked into the whole healthcare shambles in the US a good few times and it boggles my mind. Families being crippled by the costs of life saving and necessary treatment breaks my heart.
I got pregnant with my tubes tied. I had my baby a week ago :) I had the clamp method done almost 10 years ago. Needless to say, we went with the cut and burn method this time lol
@Stephen Gleason she will know. I never said I wasnt grateful for her. I have a serious heart condition which is why I had a tubal years ago. Carrying her almost killed both of us. I'm over the moon with love for this baby. Doesn't mean I want more, though
I know a mother who went trough post-natal depression for a week or so. It didn't make her a bad mom at all. After given some time she turned out to be a great and loving mom. Don't blame yourself if you need some time.
There's an old term, "change of life babies." Apparently it used to be not-uncommon for a woman to unexpectedly get pregnant in her late 40s, just before menopause. Apparently all the hormonal changes can create a sort of "final surge" of fertility in some women. That happened to a friend's grandmother - the baby was largely raised by her much-older siblings!
It's a cultural misnomer to state women having babies in their mid 40s is unusual. Here in northern Europe it is normal to begin your periods from 8 and finish in your 60s, with pregnancy occurring into a woman's 50s. My own grandmother had her last at 59. Women here often don't plan to have children until their 40s and do so naturally. In different parts of the world reproductive viability changes dramatically according to genetics.
Im a paramedic and if you walk into the ED with an active labor, they are scrambling to try and get them up to L&D. THey are not fans of delivering babies lol
Ashley Vargoshe LOL I have to walk right past my emergency section to get to labor and delivery but my OB said if it’s at night, just go to emerge, or if I’m just too scared just stop at emerge ahaha. I’m terrified man !! I just hope the nurses are nice to me lol
Donna Roberts my auntie was 39, so I’m expecting an early menopause. Looking to start trying in the near future I want kids before I hit 30...just in case😅
She is talking like it can't happen, I was told I was going in pre menopause at 36 by a doctor, so saying that women follow the same theme and stop having cycles in their 50s and 60 is a norm, but that's not always. The only I do and know is that your period does not stop all at once, they became less normal until they finally just stop
My mom alsi got pregnant at 46! She had started getting symptoms of menopause and got on hormones to help. A few months later she started with more symptoms and she was pregnant!! We were all shocked, we were already 4 siblings in our teens and preteens and here came our baby !! He came home from the hospital in Dec 24..... I remember my dad being mad when they went to get his birth certificate and being told the parents had to come in person because they thought he was the grandpa 🤣 he was terrible as a kid because my parents spoiled him and gave him all the freedom he wanted. But now my baby brother is 24 and he is my parents keeper!
I am so sorry you went through this. I used to look after women on a ward who went through this too and I saw how hard it was for them. They needed extra love and kindness.
Thank you for being honest about your feelings. Women are so often shamed for not having the stary eyed love, and it is important to hear that it is okay to not immediately feel that way.
I honestly can't imagine feeling that way. i don't see why you'd be all crazy over something that's caused you pain for 9 months, will drastically alter your life from now on, is kinda ugly and will be screaming constantly which you'll have to deal with its shit and vomit for even more months, and you're stuck with it for 18 years. Seems pretty illogical to expect everyone to go "WOW YAY I LOVE IT IM SO HAPPY."
Oh my god, i loved that explanation "There's no egg waiting for you on the other side of this, actually there is an egg but you can't get to it because it doesn't want you!" 😂
"I think her menopause is gonna have a heartbeat" I laughed soooo hard!! My cousin's wife had her tubes "tied" (what you said about the clips...less effective) They didn't want any more kids because they recently had lost their oldest (he had just turned 18 when he was killed), and she got pregnant (but she learned quickly that she was pregnant)...that kid is 15 now, and he looks exactly like his older brother (literally, like 2 drops of water)
I met somebody once she had two grown boys he had grown children this was the second marriage for each of them so he had a vasectomy because they didn't want any more children. And then she got pregnant. I would hate to be the one in the room having to tell my husband that haha. But it was his so after that baby was born she went and had her tubes tied because they didn't want any more children. Guess what yep she got pregnant again. I always said if God wants you to have them you're going to have them irregardless
I definitely understand the "getting to know" baby. With my second, I was put under for a C-section after some complications during labor. Getting general and waking a few hours later with my husband holding a baby definitely affected me more than I could have expected. It took close to a month before I felt like I did with my first baby within a couple days. It's an adjustment and I have great support from my family.
@@crappyaccount it was a long haul! I had a kidney blockage from 6 kidney stones in my right ureter and so I had to have a nephrostomy tube! That really sucked in addition to that the kidney stones kept bringing preterm labor so I had to have a terbutaline pump at the same time and 10 weeks of bed rest! But my Turner Stone is an absolute sweetheart and just turned 14 last Sunday! We would not trade him for the world. He was my fifth cesarean and by the time I had surgery the uterine wall was so thin they could see his hair. It was a scary time but we knew our family was complete with him being number five.
My mom had a "tilted uterus" (I don't know vthe proper name for it) and was told she would never be able to have children and was advised to not try, because it wasn't possible. She was determined to be a mother, though -- and here I am. (Thanks, Mom!) I love stories like this. Thank you!
It seems to run in my family, mom, sisters and I. My mom has 6 kids, my older sister has 4, my little sister has 3, and I have 1. It doesn't effect your ability to get pregnant, but it does make you carry weight differently. Also you experience more pressure on your bladder than normal and can cause more back pain. They used to think it did effect fertility, but they've since learned otherwise.
Em Bachelder I remember at one point my uterus looked retroverted and one doctor (of many i saw over that time period) said that you might get pregnant more* easily from that, but I couldn’t find any research to back that up. The last time I was examined they said my uterus wasn’t retroverted & was told it can move around, and it doesn’t normally impact fertility. They also said it can impact how certain sex positions feel (some are less comfortable or even painful sometimes) and stuff like that
Omg this takes me back, I always had a very regular cycle, only time I was ever even a day late was the 3 times I was preggers with my kids, so here I was 40 years old, hubby had a vasectomy after our 3rd, and I was a few days late, well I knew I was either pregnant, which the thought of it sent me into a panic attack, or menopause, well I don't think anyone ever prayed for menopause before, but I got a pregnancy test, waited till later in the day when hubby left for an out of town trip, took the test held my breath and prayed for menopause and it was negative, and it was menopause I have not had a cycle since, I know seems so young 40, but ya that's my story
I was pregnant (after a decade of infertility) at age 40 and assumed I was late due to premenopausal irregularity. 🙄🤣 I did take a test after just a few weeks, because my husband forced me. My little miracle is now 3 years old 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
SAME here!! I am 43 now and we are trying on purpose for another. My other child is 22. We want to give our 3 year old a sibling closer in age to grow up with. We are doing it IVF style after some loses though.
Starry Night Stronghold that’s awesome! I don’t think I’d have the energy for another! 🤣We’ve got a 13 year old and a three year old. Simultaneous Teen drama and toddler drama is something to behold 😆❤️ Best wishes for your family!!
I’m the same after 1 surprise baby I now test over the littlest thing that could be a pregnancy symptom. Even with having an iud and not having a cycle.
I used to watch this show with my littlest (who was a surprise baby), and this is one of my favorite episodes too! Just packed her off to 7th grade. Here's hoping no stealth babies in my future!
My wife and I conceived during our honeymoon. We wanted to start a family after a year of marriage but it was still great to become parents before a year anniversary. never regretted it.
Wow! How can some women be so fertile will never cease to amaze me! I've been trying for more than 6 years, yet, no baby in sight :( That's life, I guess, *sigh*
Thank you so much for talking about that moment after your baby is born and how it's okay to not feel super in love instantly. Hope all expectant or new mamas watch this video!!
@Beast bombshell oh my goodness that's awful! They had no right to "force" you to do skin to skin 🤦🏼♀️ also, congratulations on baby #3 💕 I have one baby boy who is almost one. Once he popped out I had been awake for 48 hours and hadn't been able to keep anything down for 48 hours. I also lost quite a bit of blood during the delivery so I was definitely more thrilled about being done with laboring and pushing than the fact that he'd just been born 😂 As soon as I had eaten I was like "oh hey! My baby's here and freaking adorable!!" 😂🥰😍 THEN I started slowly falling in love with him!
@Beast bombshell My daughter hated kangaroo care. Hated it, hated it, hated it. I had to call it quits, she was screaming so much. Everyone is different, including babies.
Whenever I see people convince themselves not to see a doctor because it's like acknowledging that something's wrong or because they're scared, I think "isn't it scarier if something IS wrong and you don't get treatment?"
I'm an American with no insurance. If I had a couple of thousand dollars to get tested for cancer... I wouldn't have the money to treat it. Sometimes you just don't want to know. Chemo is expensive.
Alyssa Gu Yes...I always have this ridiculous fear sometimes that if I have a little thing that could have larger repercussions that if I don’t go a doctor to get it checked out I might die. Sorry, it sounds a little confusing.
When I had insurance I used to go to the doctor for my worrisome symptoms... now that I dont have it, I've found many many things just pass. I took too much medicine as a younger person. If I do get cancer, well... I'd say it was my time and be at peace with that. And as other poster said-- cant afford chemo anyway (nor would I take it, its poison).
I've avoided the Dr mainly because I'm pretty sure they will ignore me and blow me off and that is just devastating when your having chronic pain or issues..
Hey! I’m a trans guy and just stumbled across your channel in my recommended. It would be great if you could do a video focusing on trans men and their vaginal health and maybe what they can expect from a visit to the gyno, reproductive system risks associated with testosterone therapy, if they should maybe be tested more often than women, etc. There’s so little information on this and I’m pretty young and nervous 😅
I had an unplanned pregnancy in my mid 30's and all I felt was fear. When he arrived I screamed, "Oh hell no, Mom get me social services." The doctor gave me the death stare but I was terrified. It took some therapy and a few months to come to terms with this huge life change. For me, it took a while. Women lie lol it's not a Huggies commercial for everyone.
My cousin had a similar experience, at 30 she was single and pregnant (not planned) and told me that when she started pushing my little cousin out, she just freaked out and told the nurse she'd changed her mind and didn't want to do it anymore lol. The nurse yelled at her that it was too late and she didn't have that choice anymore, and PUSH! It was harsh but it was what she needed to hear. In her case though, she said as soon as he was out she loved him fully and she would never forget the feeling of him in her arms for the first time.
On, like, day 3, I turned to my husband and said, “Let’s send the baby back.” He said, “Ok, honey. We’ll do that, but maybe we can wait a couple more weeks,ok?”
I’m 39 and I don’t even want to start all over. I love these parents. I hope I would be able to be like “yay! 18 more years of having a kiddo at home!” If this would happen to us . I love being a mom but I am also looking forward to being with my husband and just having the nest to ourselves in a few years.
... I'd rather be dead. But I really don't want children or to go through labor, and I have severe depression, so I am pretty sure that's just me being dramatic. :p
Thank you for talking about the "immediate connection" or lack there of. I remember my mom was holding my son after the birth and was like do you want him back and I was like nope I'll nap lol. I can laugh now but I felt ashamed for so long about how I felt after. It was hard and it took time but thanks to people like you speaking out I know it doesnt make me a bad mom!
Apparently it is instinctual to be attracted to someone who looks similar to you ... something to do with genetics, laws of attraction ... and one word I am completely spacing on. You know the stories of relatives falling in love only to find out they’re related? It’s similar to that.
As a mom who has an adopted son, an easy pregnancy singleton and high risk twins that needed a NICU stay, I think a lot of the "love" that is immediately felt is directly linked to fear. I love all my kids the same amount but I came out fighting immediately for the ones that needed me more and it probably could be seen as more love.
Weirdly enough, I just found out that my dad’s cousin got her tubes tied, and just got pregnant. Even the husband got his done. But the odds of them getting pregnant, according to their doctor, were about 0.00175%. (Or something around that.)
That's kind of how I felt when I was pregnant with my twins (first pregnancy). I loved them but I didn't feel attached to them (in-utero) because I didn't "know" them.
I had twins too! I did feel like I kind of knew them because we got to see them almost every week through ultrasounds, but didn't feel a deep love yet.
Thats how I felt about my son all the way up until a few days after his birth. I had a few scares during my pregnancy and I think I was so worried about everything after - how he was eating/sleeping/pooping/etc - and getting it all *right* that I didn't stop to let myself really FEEL the love I had toward him until a few days after I brought him home.
I love your mom honesty. I love you giving props to ppl in the stories and the mental health help you unknowingly/soft knowingly provide is amazing. I wish I had a doctor like you, honest about the hard stuff. Definitely felt the same about my littles. and I love them and enjoy everyday learning who they are. thank you for these comments and thoughts. Thank you for taking the time to "watch TV with me" during your very busy life. I don't know how you do it with 4, I have 3 and they run me in circles. it's the best kind of tired.
OMG, when I had my son, I felt the same "oh hi, nice to meet you" feeling, and thought there was something Wong with me because I didn't love him as a person immediately. I loved him as family, and like you said, I would have stood in front of a bus for him, but I needed the time to get to know him. Here's going to be 10 this year, and until I watched this video, I thought there was something wrong with me.
paranoiaprincess that didn’t ever happen to me but I think it makes sense when it does. It’s a whole new being. It’s all so scary. You’re new to each other. I think it was more weird that I didn’t take more time to get to know each kid.
The part about the ER dr made me laugh because of my mom’s experience with me. She didn’t realize she was in labor, that’s how chill it was. Works all morning, out to lunch around 1pm with one of my future godmothers (I have four) and she’s the one that told my mom “you’re in labor and we need to leave now.” They go to the hospital through the ER, it’s the door they were closest to. Walk in talk to the check in nurses at the desk and everyone (like five people) yelled “don’t push!”. Wheelchair to maternity, within 15 minutes I’m out. She gave birth half dressed in her business suit. I’d like to point out I’m her SECOND kid and joke about “how didn’t you know? You’d already done this before. 😂 I was almost born in a Mexican restaurant, ironic (mom’s background is mostly Mexican).
They did a pregnancy test on me before they put in my IUD, and they charged me $52 for a URINE. PREGNANCY. TEST. So, like... if your periods stop for some reason, I suggest taking a pee stick at home first yo.
Phew, thank god I live in Canada as they also did one on me. I also had to get a second IUD 2 months after my first one because it was half way out of my cervix 😅
Her description of not having an instant bond right after birth was really helpful. I've had two babies and I was really enamored with their survival, but it took some time to get to know them. Theyre my favorite people ever now! I quit working to be with them full time.
I love that you talked about the baby bond. I immediately, immensely bonded with my daughter. My son, it took about 6 weeks for that same bond and I felt like a terrible mother!
I know what you mean. When I gave birth to my first, I struggled to bond with him a little bit, but in my case, I think it was mostly me being afraid to be a bad mom to my 'perfect' little baby. Now my son and me are perfect little homies. I literally don't even sing adult songs any more! That's how much I'm listening to his nursery rhymes 😅😭😂
I love your honesty and education for women! I asked on Twitter but can you do one of these for ER season 1 episode 19? I want your take, and to see your reactions! As a l&d nurse I yelled at the TV. It is on HULU, and a train wreck of OB emergencies that could have been avoided. Great info there for teaching! Can't wait to see more videos! Also will you ever speak to miscarriages, termination (so many reasons including incompatibility with life) still birth, and greiving from the perspective of an OBGYN? Also in that realm premature babies, and micro preemies and the ethics and emotions that you may struggle with as a doctor and a mother?
This is an amazingly in-depth comment and I would pay my hard earned money to watch every second of an episode(s) that had any of those topics in it/them.
YAS! I told her that in another episode just a few days ago! I listed a few ER episodes, but this one was top of the list. (Ok, kind of because I was going in chronological order lol. I even watched it again yesterday on Hulu. It was *intense.* I see why it won so many Emmys.)
I just had a dream last night that I was pregnant and didn't know it. As I carried my newborn baby girl out of the hospital, she was whispering, "Pizza... pizza... pizza..." 🤣
Music Is A Rainbow i had a dream i had a baby; didnt want it, chucked it in a fire and when I pulled it out it had turned into a rotisserie chicken 🤔😂😂😂
I was the same when I had my son. I loved him immediately because he was mine, but my mother-in-law kept asking “isn’t he the best? Don’t you just love him so much?” And I couldn’t say “I love him but I don’t know him yet” out loud
In regards to not feeling “connected” to your baby as soon as their born. I had a very unplanned “impossible” pregnancy. (PCOS messed my ovaries UP) and I was a single mom from the day I found out I was pregnant. Had a very traumatic L&D almost died twice and when they gave her to me for the first time the first thing I felt was a switch flip and I immediately went into a weird instinctual survival mode rather than love at first sight. Took me a few days to feel that strong bond and convection. I was scared out of my wits because it was just me and her alone at home with no help and I was recovering from a botched C-Section.... but I think that made our connection stronger in the long run....
Kristen Powell my best friend was this way. PCOS, two previous miscarriages. Told she’d never carry a baby to term. Found out at 24 weeks she was pregnant with my god daughter. Horrible delivery after a 3 day labor, 200+ stitches, needed 2 units of blood. She told me one day she felt like a horrible mom because she didn’t instantly love the baby the way she was “supposed” to. It’s sad that society puts so much pressure on women like this!
My mom had me when she was 40 after being told for years that she couldn’t have kids, she said I was a miracle & I blessed her by growing my foot straight through her rib lol. They had to break her ribs to get me out... I’m now 26 & my mom’s 66, I’ve always had the oldest parent outta everyone growing up, but I wouldn’t change that for the world because I love my mom dearly. Only thing that bothers me about her age is I’m scared of losing her because I already lost my step dad so she’s all I have left. I will say good on my mom cause even tho she was so much older than everyone else’s parents she still coached my softball team for 12 years & at over 50yrs old was sliding the bases with 2 bad knees, I give that woman ALOT of credit. She takes absolutely no pain meds for anything, needs both knees replaced & has had a heart attack, she’s one tough cookie! Btw can you do more of this series cause I’m like you I never understood how people didn’t know they were pregnant. I don’t even have sex often & took a test when my period was late due to stress & not being on birth control just because it had been a month & a half, turns out I was just super stressed which I knew, but I gained weight too & I never gain weight... must be the honey buns I’ve been eating recently LOL. On a serious note tho even tho I knew there was no chance in hell I still took a test cause it’s the smart thing to do.
@@amanpreetkaur7227 some birth control stops your periods I havent had a period in years as I have the nexplanton implant, it wouldn't occur to me to take a test if I didn't get a period after having sex as I don't have them anyway. Side note I haven't had sex in almost 2 years so I think am good 😂😂 .................... Unless am having an elephant 😐😐
When I was struggling after my (very planned, very wanted) first born arrived, my mother said "you don't have to love him now - what has he done so far other than make you tired and sad? Just be patient and the love will come." Best advice I have ever gotten. The first six weeks were rough and then it all came together.
Melania Cannon Also, postpartum depression is very real. Even if someone doesn’t have it to the extent of it affecting their day to day life, it could still make you not feel very close to your baby. I like your mom’s statement though, it’s very true. You might love them cause they’re your kid, doesn’t mean you have to always like them.
Ive heard this advice for marriage😂😂
I love this SO much. I had trouble bonding after a hard pregnancy & probably postpartum depression. I remember sitting up in the hospital during rare quiet moments just holding him. This advice is what every mom should share with daughters. 💜
I...actually really needed this. I'm 8 months pregnant, and don't feel 100% attached yet; thank you for this.
Shelby LaFrance it’ll come, I felt like that with both of my kids.... took about 2 months to really fall in love with them
*"I think her menopause is going to have a heartbeat"*
*I DIED*
😃 my mother was told she was in menopause by her doctor at 46. My parents moved across the country and when they arrived my mom didn't feel right. 7 MONTHS PREGNANT! How could she not know?!?! Last of 11 kids so......
That was funny
@@vwgirl My mum was 47 when she had me, found out she was pregnant at 6 months, she still fit into her normal clothes they had gone on holiday and found out when she got back cause she "felt a bit under the weather"
same here xd
This needs to be on a t-shirt 😂
Dr Mike: Chest compressions chest compressions chest compressions
Dr mama jones: pregnancy test pregnancy test pregnancy is test
Legal eagle: bailiff will tackle you
Those three channels are more educational than any school 🤣
The only three Educational RUclips's I'm sub to
I see I'm not the only woman of culture here
LOL, I thought the same thing!
YES!!
"We named him Hunter"
- Oh, cause she thought he might kill her?
"Cause he snuck up on us"
- Oh, or that.
I knew someone who let their 6 yr old name the baby. It was cute. Dashal or something fun and cute.
I asked my 6 yr old what she'd name a baby. "Sparkle, glitter, dertorder(said with an unspellable fake spanish accent)"
Mama Doctor Jones lol
Heather Meredith I think you should’ve gone with Dertorder 😂
My mom named my sister Joy because she was in labor for a long time and the baby finally was born at sunrise and there's a Bible verse like "Joy comes in the morning."
She let my older sisters name me and couldn't remember what name they chose when I was born so there's a part in my birth video where she's like "What's her name again??"
Heather Meredith my older brother named my younger brother Harry, after Harry and the Bucket Full of Dinosaurs (book series/tv show) and everyone thought he was named after Harry Potter, because the books were this new phenomenon at the time, but it was really my 5/6 year old brother loved a book series about a little boy with a bucket full of size changing dinosaurs. It’s quite sweet
“We decided to name him Hunter, because he snuck up on us.” LMFAOOO! That is top trait naming right there!🤣
I know a woman that was older when she had her baby so she named him Walker. It was an exaggeration but she said 'I'm going to need one ( a walker) when I see him graduate high school.'
@@howellomaha Aww lol
Sounds like such a dad joke 😂 still a cute name though
She named her kid like a Bible character
"We named him Hunter bc he snuck up on us.... 😂😂😂❤⚾ That's too cute and an AMAZING story to tell him and others one day.😄😍😘
Wow can only imagine
@@melissaweigh4508 0⁰
Q
“let’s take a moment to get to know each other” i just picture her and a newborn baby sitting at a table drinking coffee
Actually, you've known each other for 9 months.
But I can understand that some mothers don't feel/realize it.
It makes me think of a picture I saw on Facebook about how to bond with your baby and it has "X NO" beside a picture of a mom and baby sitting at a table with coffee 🤣
"Well, I like long warm baths, not a fan of broccoli (made everything shaky inside, not fun), and love orange juice.. sorry for the cravings, lol... BTW, where are dad and big sis,"
The odds of this happening (by the stats she gave) are about 0.012%
Thank
I can confirm this ^^
Being pinned by Mama Doctor Jones made my day!
Tess Aurea My golly that’s one special baby!!!🤩
Which is absolutely terrifying. So glad that salpingectomy is the new standard! I'm much more comfortable knowing that the failure rate for the surgery I had is so low, that for the only case I could find where someone documented it failing, they also wrote that they believe it was the only instance of failure ever on record. That's a BARELY low enough chance of pregnancy for me!
My sister had a "Tubal baby" baby after tubal. She found out at 20 weeks. My niece was born end of Sept. They named her Autumn Grace because she was born in Autumn by the Grace of God. My sister said when she told the guy who did her epidural that this was a tubal baby, he asked who the doctor was that did her tubal and when she told him, the guy turned white as a ghost. When asked what was wrong, he said "He did my wife's tubal🤣🤣🤣
OH NOOO
My name is Autumn lol
Guess what I got a tubal rigation too and i'm pregnant
😅😂
Oops!
Ah, this show has been the source of so much paranoia for me.
Me: Oh, period started. Nothing to worry about.
Brain: But what if your uterus is full of lies?
Melissa 😂😂😂😂Oh my gosh!! Really, it’s okay♥️❤️😘
😂😅🙈
Honestly I think a lot of people in these are just in denial. There has been 1 that I saw that I believed she didn't have any signs of pregnancy, but she had 3 young kids and knew what pregnancy felt like for her.
😂😅😂😅😂😅
🤣🤣🤣🤣 OMG THIS IS MY THOUGHTS RIGHT NOW!
My siblings and i were all born on failed contraception.
I was the condom.
1st brother (8 yrs after me) was the shot.
Sister (9 yrs after me) was the pill.
2nd brother (11 yrs after me) was a combo of pill, shot, and religious condom use.
In a span of 4 years, my mom used preventive methods and *they all failed* . She was pissed every time and to this day goes on a rant when it's brought up.
ScorBug92 that must make for some interesting family dinners My first baby was a breakthrough as well I laugh about it with her!
ScorBug92 I know a man that got a vasectomy after they had one baby and he was supposedly sterile but his wife got pregnant. He somehow grew back together so he got fixed again and then along came baby number 2, supposedly fixed again then he had another baby. You might think his wife was cheating but all four little boys looked exactly like him so there was no denying they were his. He finally stopped having children.
Kristen Gill I used a condom and I was on the pill I am really surprised by ur comment It should go without saying dear
Kristen Gill who said anything about hormones ??? We were discussing birth control period Please stop just stop I responded to a funny comment ur making this into something bigger So I am finished responding don’t have a lot of time to spend on this
Kristen Gill that’s not entirely correct. my best friend got an IUD to stop her period, but still took the pill so that she had extra pregnancy protection if anything were to happen to her IUD.
OH MY LORD if I did the math right, she had only a .02% chance of getting pregnant and leaving the hospital with a healthy baby! Miracle child right there!
Yup, I got the same percentage - was looking for your comment! :)
you need to consider though that the 0,8% are usually "the number of women using this contraceptive who do get pregnant", especially considering most people with tubal ligation are at least over 30 this already factors in a "general" probability of pregnancy of maybe 10% (just guessing here). So the odds would be more like 0.1-0,2%. Still low, but not quite as low
And a boy at that because she had two girls.
I had 1.45% so ummm yeah im BAD at math lmao
.016% is what I got. Craziness. That’s 16 out of 100,000!
Thank you for your honesty talking about not immediately bonding with your child after giving birth!
I think it happens a lot more than people realize. My husband was expecting that feeling and was really thrown off when it didn't happen. It made his transition to parenthood harder, but I think knowing that that only happens to some people would have helped.
It happened to me too, although I díd feel an enormous responsibility for my baby and was pretty proud that she was mý baby. I just didn't have the 'I'm in love with my baby right away'-feeling. The feeling had to grow.
Right now, 6 years later, I have a really close bond with my daughter and love her to bits. She's a real mommy's girl now.
I will probably have the same with my next child (which I will expect in less than 2 weeks).
I had ppd... it was hard for me. I thought breastfeeding would help, but it didn’t. When I stopped breastfeeding, at 10 months, I think is when it started getting better.
It definitely took time for me!
As a person who didn't feel that way, I feel so bad for people who do. One of my dearest friends had a really hard time w/ baby #5 (yes, she chose to have that many & more) and she thought she was going crazy because it hadn't happened before. Kudos to moms who hang in there
"Being a mother is my favorite thing I've done... on planet Earth." Are you delivering alien babies Doctor Jones?
More like what is her favourite thing in the rest of the galaxy?
😂
😂
And most difficult thing.
Well, who knows! Maybe she’ll deliver a baby in space! Some people are really gung ho for moving off planet.
Our family had a similar addition. Momma had her bits taken care of after four kiddos. Many years later, here comes starry eyed Anna. Momma went into the office of the doctor that performed her tubal ligation carrying a newborn and told the Dr. that he was paying for her college tuition. And he did. Anna is now in her 20’s and has graduated college.
Omigosh, THAT is a great story! Dr paid for her college - ha!
Love that ending. Good on doc for holding up his end.
This is such an amazing tale! 😻💜💖💜😻
Please watch the Dr. Phil episode about the women who believe they are pregnant for like 5+ YEARS. I think they call it a cryptic pregnancy. I don’t have a clue how someone could actually believe this. I’d love to see an OB Reacts about it.
On the show the women called it the wrong name "cryptic"
It's called a phantom pregnancy.
No she’s right thats what the women call it. They’re using the term wrong which is pointed out several times throughout the show. They’re so stuck on the idea that they’re pregnant and that the doctors are wrong because so it can’t be a phantom pregnancy, that they depend on a word they found online with the wrong definition that they believe they can be pregnant for several years.
@@anag.9071 that's sad
I think that’s more in a psychiatrist’s lane than an obgyn...
My grandpa was a doctor - he retired in the 1980s - and he once had a patient come in complaining of a moving mass in her stomach. She called it a "tentacular cancer" and wanted it removed. She was 8 months pregnant
Omg seriously?! A “tentacular cancer”.... people are nuts out there, lmao!
Someone's been reading too much Lovecraft 😂😂
At least it was removed a month later! Lol 🤣🤣
@@addiemiller9677 Or sooner. A little early is fine, usually.
Lmao.
I'm reminded of an episode of Malcolm in the Middle where the mom was upset because she didn't like her new baby. At the end the dad says, "Wow, I guess it has been too long. You've hated all of our babies. After a while, you're going to love that baby as much as anyone has ever loved a baby, but it won't happen right away. Reese took a few months, but he was a nipple-biter, so I get it..."
Wasn't counting on that show to talk about a real thing that happens. Maybe I should go re-watch it.
Makes sense i had my son who couldn't latch properly it didn't matter how i held him he caused pain and my nipples to bleed, plus i also had a bad tear to heal from so of course i am fustrated and upset bust once i swapped to baby bottles and was expressing into those bottles i was much more happier
I was a strong sucker myself and I tore my poor mother’s nipple off.. She loves me though! 😂
@@omomo202 my son no matter how i placed him would not be able to latch properly my nipples bled, and were very sore i couldn't even wear a bra, no material one either thats how sore i was
@@omomo202 Omg I didn't even know that could happen lol your poor mom
@@omomo202 the- the whole nipple??
My middle name is “Hope” because my mom had 2 miscarriages in 10 years between my other two sisters and had me at 45. I was her last “Hope” to have a baby. And I really like my name story and thought it was worth sharing :)
Starling Summer My mom was 45 when she had me. I was her 7th child, and only daughter. 💗
I have two daughters, Grace and Faith and I was always asked if the next one was going to be Hope. I always said, there is no hope for a Hope!
Aww that's precious :D
@@lisablondell2349 Lol that's great I hope God doesn't play a trick on you and give you another baby lol
@@RedRoseSeptember22 Are you saying god controls individual sperm to fertilise an individual woman's egg as a "trick" but can't stop individual babies dying from diseases or other complications?
I just cracked up laughing at “Spoiler alert, I think her menopause is gonna have a heartbeat” lmao
"do not pass go, do not collect $200. there is not an egg waiting for you on the other side"
"Well.... there is.... BUT IT DOESN'T WANT YOU" She's the best. 🤣
@@tiffanyramus3465 "NO SPERM! Stay on that side!" I agree😂😂
My mom told me that when she first saw me after i was born she started screaming "OH MY GOD MY BABY'S A CONEHEAD!!" to my grandma and a room full of doctors and nurses
great jesus xD
Your head looks very pretty now ☺️☺️
Awesome this killed me!
Keitlyn Lott u. 😭😭😭
The doctor say I was a boy xD and later when doctor finish with me, I was with open eyes and my mom put her hand in my eyes xD
Hi I'm a math nerd, and going by the percentage chances you gave in the video (I've taken 3-5% chance of spontaneous pregnancy as 4% for the calculation), and the chance of this situation happening is 0.016%, or 1 in 6250
Of women in her situation,
Women aged 40-something with tubed tied
Did you factor in how women her age have α 50% chance of miscarriage?
@@mikilynn471 Looks like it otherwise it would be 0.032%.
I'll put this on my cousins birthday card. He was a tubal ligation baby with a mom over 40.
Just a Nerd dang. Ok I'm coming for some comfort. Got pregnant on depo, pill, and I just had 2 babies in the last 2 years. I also have a 17 year old. Life's weird y'all. Hold on for the ride. I love her advice at the end.
My first reaction for my first was "oh my. he's not that cute?!" I mean he was bloody and cheesy and slightly blue. Then I felt awful because I didn't have that starry eyed feeling. But once he was cleaned up and I was holding him the love and protectiveness went into overdrive where I didn't even want his father to hold him yet.
My son was a week overdue and weighed 9 pounds 5 1/2 ounces at birth. He was 22 inches long and his cheeks went down to his chest- no neck. He was enormous and not at all cute yet. That took a while:) Not all babies are beautiful, not even to their mamas. I loved him from the start but I'm a realist.
Incidentally, he was a first for the hospital I went to in several ways. He was their biggest baby since the hospital had opened about 40 years before. He was the first baby in the new delivery room set up to resemble a bedroom instead of an operating room. They had built two nurseries but he was the first to be put in the second. It was a baby boom and the second nursery, up to that point, had only ever been used for storage. He became a mini-celebrity at that hospital and drew a crowd when I brought him in for asthma at 5 months. Everyone had to come see him. It was so strange.
I feel like that will be me hahah When I imagine things to see how i will feel i know for sure thats how i'm gonna react haha. Im currently pregnant with my first cx I dont know how its gonna go, but oof, I'm defidently gonna prepare myself for it hahahah
If I ever have kids (doubtful), I see my self telling him/her in a sing song voice how ugly they are 😝 Most newborns look like little aliens and I wish we would acknowledge this as a society 😆
@@heatherfoster2497 like seriously.. i was born a month too early, so apparently I had this weird fatty layer on my skin for like a few weeks? And my mom straight out says I was the weirdest, disgusting creature she had ever seen when I was born... but I was about 2800 grams, so pretty small, and when we left the hospital I weighed 2600 grams. So when my mom went shopping at the store, she would just place me in the basket with the groceries, cus I was so small and light 🙄🙄. There is a meme of a kid (about 3-5yrs old maybe) with a horrible 90's bangs etc being angry while shaking a hairbrush, my mom genuinely thought that was something my sister had found from when I was around that age... I had cute moments, but like... the haircuts sure messed up my cuteness too 🙄. I was not a pretty child nor newborn lmaooo
@@heatherfoster2497 My nephew was very late so he had “old man skin” and pictures of him with his big eyes had him making claw-like pointing jestures. So I said he looked like E.T.. Boy did I get in trouble for that. 🤭
This is so similar to my mums story, my mum had a “tubes tied” following 2 difficult pregnancy’s with my sisters, 13 years later, periods stopped, weight gain... but had negative pregnancy test. Doctors told her she potentially had a cyst? Had a ultrasound and the doctor said “welp, your cyst has arms and legs” she was 6 months along at this point. They theorised that her operation could have reversed due to a slipped disc that was being treated with traction? Who knows if that’s what happened, but I’m still nicknamed Peggy, as she slipped her disc by bending down to get a clothes peg she dropped.
Sammie 9412 (
😂
The part “your cyst has arms and legs” lmao 😂
And Peggy!
I became pregnant after a tubal ligation, she is now 28. I named her Zoe - Greek word for Life. Seemed appropriate!
Aw my daughter's name is Zoey too (except with a Y on the end) because she gave me life and a reason to keep on living. Plus it's just a really pretty name.
Hello, Greek person here! Glad you used a Greek name, we have some really beautiful ones. Γειά 👋🏼🇬🇷
Karen Harvey 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
This is really trippy to me I have a friend named Zoe who is 20 and was born after her mom had her tubes tied.
For all those interested: here are the dictionary entries for Ancient Greek "ζωή" (Zoe)
www.perseus.tufts.edu/hopper/morph?l=zwh&la=greek#lexicon
My Mom had a tubal ligation after 3 kids. She was supposed to go back for a test, but we were moving, so it didn't happen. She discovered she was pregnant a few months later, and had my little sister. She always nagged me and my siblings about how easy it was to get pregnant, even if you've had your tubes tied.
When I was still a student nurse, one of my labor patients was in her early 40s and had a tubal ligation. Evidently, she was pregnant when her tubes were tied. This was like 1981 and at home pregnancy tests were not as sensitive then but were quite expensive.
That happened to me. Four kids under five. Got my tubes cut, tied, and burned. I got pregnant. I've always told my kids how easy it is to get pregnant! Uggh!
I am not a mother (yet) but my mum has always said "At first your baby is a stranger that you really want to be friends with but you just haven't gotten to know yet" glad to know that other mothers have thought the same thing
Sailor Larien I can’t imagine feeling that way.. i have been so attached to my daughter since she was born she never felt like a stranger to me.. she literally grew inside of me! I don’t need to be “friends” with her lol I’m her mama and she loves me and I love her! Since day one
Truth! Sometimes it's automatic, sometimes it comes in time. It's ok!
I can relate with that.
"Take a pregnancy test no matter what"
Me, a lebian: uhh
I just realized I said "lebian" lmaoo
Doesn’t matter, you can’t trust those women, all it takes is some crazy girl with a turkey baster and donated sperm. 😂 Please don’t take me seriously.
Spontaneous combustion happens right?!?! 😂 I am not to be taken seriously either...
Now this whole thread is funny
As an asexual, I had a similar reaction.
There’s a reason why doctors jokingly call it “tubal litigation”. I got pregnant a year after I had a tubal ligation, even though my OBGYN said, her words, I was tied and fried and it would a miracle if I got pregnant again. Well. The miracle happened, but unfortunately it didn’t stick. I had miscarriage in the bathroom while getting an ultrasound to make certain there was no ectopic pregnancy. Talk about emotional turmoil. Freaked by an unwanted pregnancy on one day, and in agonized grief over the loss of it the next. Hormones never help in these situations.
*hugs m* I’m sorry you went through all of that.
My mom sadly went through the same thing. She started having weird cravings and my sister and I picked up on it and asked if she was pregnant again. She said yes. We were all so excited and surprised because she had her tubes clamped I believe. Sadly pretty soon after she told us the good news and was forced to tell us the tragic news. She had a miscarriage. We were devastated. I honestly still am 😅 I still think about my sibling in heaven. I think it was so hard on my mom she never really talked about it again. I think a piece of her heart was lost the day she miscarried. I'm sorry for your loss it's a very tragic thing so many women go through. I wish no one had to go through this
Unfortunately? Odd choice of words for someone who made a decision to never have kids again. I'm so confused. I'm not being a jerk but i really can't grasp the mixed emotions.
@@ems7623 it's really not an odd choice of words though. It is unfortunate when we loose a baby doesn't matter what the circumstances are it's 99.9% of the time always a tragedy that we feel very deeply even if the pregnancy was unwanted. Just because we don't want the baby doesn't mean we don't want to birth the baby and give it up for adoption. We don't know the circumstances so we cannot judge. And by the way there's multiple reasons for someone to have such a procedure and some of them are actually medical reasons. My mom for example had to do this procedure because of her health (not exactly sure as she never talked much about it but it was something due to her health) well she fell pregnant with my step dad. The first two months went fine. She was shocked, confused but happy. She was feeling a mix of emotions which were normal. She lost the baby and it was devastating to all of us, especially my mom, so much so she has never spoken about it since the loss. Not a word. It hurt her so badly to lose that baby. So in My opinion using unfortunately is not an odd thing to say. It is unfortunate when we loose our babies. Especially when we haven't even been given the time to wrap our heads around the fact we are pregnant before we loose the baby.
@@ems7623 I had two previous stillborn babies, one at full term, the other at 28 weeks, ten months apart. Having another baby a year later with medical intervention was terrifying, but successful. After that, having birthed two live children (losing the two in between), I was done with that part of my life. Getting pregnant after having my tubes tied was not in the plan. But discovering I was pregnant again was both terrifying (at first) and then devastating when I lost it. Also, hormones don’t help with emotions around these kinds of life altering events. Hope that clears up any confusion.
My wife and I found she was pregnant with twins 2 years after her tubal. More than a shocker that’s for sure
Life... finds a way
Oh wow people really shouldn’t assume that everything works then
This is absolutely horrifying
You can not begin to understand how happy I am to have stumbled across this channel. I'm a fourth-year medical student, and I just finished my Ob/Gyn rotation a couple of months ago, and, it was one of the most wonderful experiences of my life. This comment is probably arbitrary on the platform of the RUclips comment section, but I wanted you, Mama Doctor Jones, to know just how much respect I have for you and what you do. The Ob/Gyn I worked with was a young mom, and let me tell you, seeing her crush it as an obstetrician, gynecologist, and surgeon, while also fulfilling the role of a mother of two kids, was the most awe-inspiring things I've ever witnessed. To all the laypeople out there, if you've ever met a female ObGyn who is also raising a family, then you've met a real-life superhero, because it is a feat to do either well, and superhuman to do both well.
That was long-winded, but Mama Doctor Jones, I hope you know that you're a special kind of person and I love your channel. Keep being your wonderful self (:
Joe Varner also a medical student and this channel is amazing!
I had, what the doctor called, a complete sterilization at 28 years old. I got pregnant at 46 and carried her 5 months before I lost her. They said I had extremely high protein levels in my blood. To this day, I still don't know what that meant and how it pertained to my miscarriage. It was heartbreaking, but I felt something was off from day one, so I never told anyone I was pregnant. I'm a bigger girl, so I got by with it. I finally broke down and told my daughter when I turned 50. To this day, she's the only one that knows.
I know this is long after your comment, but I am so sorry this happened. High protein could mean pre-eclampsia where the blood pressure goes up rapidly and can affect other organs. It happens after 20 weeks and can be dangerous for baby and Mom. They don't know the cause but it could be from blood exchange from baby. Again, so sorry, your doctor should have explained. 🥰
“Spoiler alert! I think her menopause has a heartbeat.” 😂👍🏼
Can we all agree that Mama Doctor Jones is the cutest person?!?
I wish she was my doctor!
I wish she was my doctor! She's so genuine and her personality is so suited to her work. LOVE IT!
I'd be thrilled to have her as my doctor.
This episode was probably the sweetest. That unexpected, unplanned baby is loved and adored as if he was planned the whole time. It fills my heart.
Yup! Big sister, "I wanted a baby brother my whole life!"
I'd say the relief after she realized she wasnt actually dieing might be a factor to the "i love this baby" feeling.
I loved mine from the second I knew I was pregnant
Person Incognito didn’t you watch this? She didn’t know she was pregnant
@@personincognito3989 as much as I love that you are sharing this on EVERY post like a troll, not everyone does and that's okay, I'd even argue maybe it's a bad idea to love them immediately because that would make it all the more devastating if you miscarry.
@@teresahowick5197 Chester I did watch it. I'm giving a comment in regards to people saying it took a while for them to love them. But you've taken it as a judgment somehow?
@@gracehaven5459 no dear I'm not being a troll I'm commenting on whatever the f*** I want cuz this is social media and I can do that. But you've taken it as a judgment. Nor do I care what some stranger of any age or any given country thinks about my comment on social media.
My grandma had my father at 47, when she already had a 14 y.o. daughter. The shocker is that it was planned and wanted. Rural Spain in the 60s, in the middle of a fascist dictatorship, priest said that there needed to be more children in town so... They got to work!
My mother was 45 and my father 51 when I was born. I was planned and wanted (second marriage, dad never had kids before). I hate ppl asking if someone was an accident. It drove my mom crazy!
Julia Gallego My grandmother had my dad in 1925 and she was 46 years old. She got married at 39 and had her first baby a girl at age 42. Can you imagine? No fertility help it just happened and both children were healthy and my Dad lived till age 93 and his sister lived to 92. My daughter had a baby at 46 but it did require fertility doctors and high risk ob’s.
I'm 8 years younger than my aunt. Who's 16 years younger than my mom. Definitely a surprise. Only learned recently that my brother was a surprise. He came 4 years after my sister. Apparently my dad got himself "fixed" once they knew my mom was pregnant and even before my brother arrived.
Julia Gallego cool, they were team players!! 😊😊😉😉
My husband was the oh shit baby. His mom was 46 and Dad was 56. They already had 10 kids. The youngest was already 10. Her tubes were tied. She thought she was going through menopause a little early. Went to the family doctor for tests and a check up. The doctor came back in and said "oh shit Ruby, you're pregnant!"
My granny had a case of "menopause with a heartbeat", when she was 44. Luckily for me, though, as I probably wouldn't have been born without my mother 😅
nobody saw that girls eyebrows ? in the first clip
also did you notice how much the mother and father look alike
MDJ saw them and raised hers in sympathy.
Oh, I saw them, but I thought of that "not nice, don't say anything" rule, but believe me I saw them.
She was just permanently surprised by having another sibling. Lol
Is anyone going to mention her name is M'leesa...
I loved my son when he was born, but I wasn't starry eyed in love either. That took time for me. I needed to bond and get to know this little person who just tore me apart 😂
ROFL!
Well true! I mean I did bond with all 3 but it makes logical sense when moms don’t immediately. I totally get it.
For me too, it came gradually.
Also, I sometimes feel like it's not ok to say I gave birth to her, when she was cut out of me. I didn't get to experience the miracle of birth, I just fell asleep and woke up in ICU without her in my belly. And the fact that I didn't get to see her until 36 hours later, longest hours ever, might have something to do with delayed bonding.
My late mil had my husband at 42. She thought she was in menopause or had a tumor. Low and behold, my husband was a 8 pound tumor.
Her tumour had a heartbeat! 😂
I feel like a lot of these "I don't get why she didn't go see a doctor" can be explained with the fact that the show is from USA.
Unlike almost every other country in the world, seeing the doctor, even for something like this, could be an extreme strain on the household finances. And that's even with medical insurance.
So I can totally see why many would choose not to see a doctor, especially when they've had a medical procedure performed that should make it 99.91% impossible to get pregnant. How many would toss the equivalent of a month's worth of food out just to find out if they are part of the 0.09% that slipped through the cracks?
morphman86, not at all. More that it can be a huge inconvenience to go to the doctor, not all doctors actually care, etc.
I have more than once said "I'll go to the doctor when something's actively falling off." And that is mainly for financial reasons.
This is a very good point! And it’s usually a combination of financial reasons and the massive inconvenience of having to take time off because the doctors offices are usually closed at 5-6 pm and not open on the weekends!
That's what I was thinking. I'm not from the US and am so fortunate to live somewhere with free healthcare, but I've looked into the whole healthcare shambles in the US a good few times and it boggles my mind. Families being crippled by the costs of life saving and necessary treatment breaks my heart.
@Genesis Criollo eh... No. That's a bad reason to not see a doctor.
That's like saying you won't go to school because sometimes teachers teach wrong.
I got pregnant with my tubes tied. I had my baby a week ago :)
I had the clamp method done almost 10 years ago. Needless to say, we went with the cut and burn method this time lol
Megan Koutroubas 😂 congratulations on your new baby! And your new and improved tubal ligation 😂
Oh wow. This stuff just absolutely amazes me! Congrats on new baby and I hope for you, this newer tubal works better! 😂
@Beast bombshell She's my miracle baby. There's no doubt about it.
@Stephen Gleason she will know. I never said I wasnt grateful for her. I have a serious heart condition which is why I had a tubal years ago. Carrying her almost killed both of us. I'm over the moon with love for this baby. Doesn't mean I want more, though
My sister had my nephew after tubal ligation. She ended up getting a hysterectomy afterward.
I know a mother who went trough post-natal depression for a week or so. It didn't make her a bad mom at all. After given some time she turned out to be a great and loving mom. Don't blame yourself if you need some time.
I can’t imagine the relief this mom felt when she looked at her son. It wasn’t death, it was life. No wonder she fell in love with him in a heartbeat.
My grandmother had my aunt a month before her 48th birthday. She thought she couldn't have kids anymore!
Amazing!!!
There's an old term, "change of life babies." Apparently it used to be not-uncommon for a woman to unexpectedly get pregnant in her late 40s, just before menopause. Apparently all the hormonal changes can create a sort of "final surge" of fertility in some women. That happened to a friend's grandmother - the baby was largely raised by her much-older siblings!
Wow.
There's this woman that I heard of who's 48 and having a baby...but she's having serious complications from it. 😖
It's a cultural misnomer to state women having babies in their mid 40s is unusual. Here in northern Europe it is normal to begin your periods from 8 and finish in your 60s, with pregnancy occurring into a woman's 50s. My own grandmother had her last at 59. Women here often don't plan to have children until their 40s and do so naturally. In different parts of the world reproductive viability changes dramatically according to genetics.
"No sperm, stay on that side." Is a great sentence. I want that on a shirt
It would be a great slogan for a condom company!
I make T shirts and I love this 🤣🤣🤣
Im a paramedic and if you walk into the ED with an active labor, they are scrambling to try and get them up to L&D. THey are not fans of delivering babies lol
Ashley Vargoshe LOL I have to walk right past my emergency section to get to labor and delivery but my OB said if it’s at night, just go to emerge, or if I’m just too scared just stop at emerge ahaha. I’m terrified man !! I just hope the nurses are nice to me lol
I know a paramedic who had to deliver a baby. He was shell shocked telling the story XD Baby was healthy
It runs in my family for women to go through menopause early, my mum *accidentally* had me at 40 and she started menopause at 41.
Lindsay Mckeown Wow. I'll be 55 in just over a month, and I haven't started menopause yet.
Donna Roberts my auntie was 39, so I’m expecting an early menopause. Looking to start trying in the near future I want kids before I hit 30...just in case😅
My mum was 33 and early thirties is quite common in the close family :/
Our family too. I started perimenopause at 36 had a baby at 38 ( a planned baby!) just weeks before my 39th birthday and fully post menopausal at 48.
She is talking like it can't happen, I was told I was going in pre menopause at 36 by a doctor, so saying that women follow the same theme and stop having cycles in their 50s and 60 is a norm, but that's not always. The only I do and know is that your period does not stop all at once, they became less normal until they finally just stop
My mom alsi got pregnant at 46! She had started getting symptoms of menopause and got on hormones to help. A few months later she started with more symptoms and she was pregnant!! We were all shocked, we were already 4 siblings in our teens and preteens and here came our baby !! He came home from the hospital in Dec 24..... I remember my dad being mad when they went to get his birth certificate and being told the parents had to come in person because they thought he was the grandpa 🤣 he was terrible as a kid because my parents spoiled him and gave him all the freedom he wanted. But now my baby brother is 24 and he is my parents keeper!
I got pregnant IN my tube after getting my tubes tied. Extremely painful and not a happy ending like this. These people are truly blessed.
Tubal pregnancy is a type of ectopic pregnancy.
I'm so sorry to hear that. 😢
I am so sorry you went through this. I used to look after women on a ward who went through this too and I saw how hard it was for them. They needed extra love and kindness.
Thank you for being honest about your feelings. Women are so often shamed for not having the stary eyed love, and it is important to hear that it is okay to not immediately feel that way.
I honestly can't imagine feeling that way. i don't see why you'd be all crazy over something that's caused you pain for 9 months, will drastically alter your life from now on, is kinda ugly and will be screaming constantly which you'll have to deal with its shit and vomit for even more months, and you're stuck with it for 18 years. Seems pretty illogical to expect everyone to go "WOW YAY I LOVE IT IM SO HAPPY."
@@crappyaccount I think id love it more since it finally came out lmao.
@@spongeboob8971 XD
Right. It took me a few weeks with my firstborn. I felt horrible feeling this way.
0:43 We all know this look meant "Oh damn.. those eyebrows.." but Dr Jones just wanted to be nice and didn't say anything 😂
Oh my god, i loved that explanation "There's no egg waiting for you on the other side of this, actually there is an egg but you can't get to it because it doesn't want you!" 😂
"I think her menopause is gonna have a heartbeat"
I laughed soooo hard!!
My cousin's wife had her tubes "tied" (what you said about the clips...less effective)
They didn't want any more kids because they recently had lost their oldest (he had just turned 18 when he was killed), and she got pregnant (but she learned quickly that she was pregnant)...that kid is 15 now, and he looks exactly like his older brother (literally, like 2 drops of water)
I met somebody once she had two grown boys he had grown children this was the second marriage for each of them so he had a vasectomy because they didn't want any more children. And then she got pregnant. I would hate to be the one in the room having to tell my husband that haha. But it was his so after that baby was born she went and had her tubes tied because they didn't want any more children. Guess what yep she got pregnant again. I always said if God wants you to have them you're going to have them irregardless
@@KCCAT5 whaaaaatt. What are the odds 🙈
@@sarahphillips8005 ikr. If You are meant to have them You will.
Reincarnation??
What made her know she was preg to take a test and find out if the tubes were tied ? She just felt she was?
I definitely understand the "getting to know" baby. With my second, I was put under for a C-section after some complications during labor. Getting general and waking a few hours later with my husband holding a baby definitely affected me more than I could have expected. It took close to a month before I felt like I did with my first baby within a couple days. It's an adjustment and I have great support from my family.
I got pregnant at 42 and amazingly it was planned! Also his middle name is "Stone" because I collected 25 kidney stones during a very rocky pregnancy!
oh wow, that sounds awful
@@crappyaccount it was a long haul! I had a kidney blockage from 6 kidney stones in my right ureter and so I had to have a nephrostomy tube! That really sucked in addition to that the kidney stones kept bringing preterm labor so I had to have a terbutaline pump at the same time and 10 weeks of bed rest! But my Turner Stone is an absolute sweetheart and just turned 14 last Sunday! We would not trade him for the world. He was my fifth cesarean and by the time I had surgery the uterine wall was so thin they could see his hair. It was a scary time but we knew our family was complete with him being number five.
ffliberty I think it’s creative
😳
What a story!!
My mom had a "tilted uterus" (I don't know vthe proper name for it) and was told she would never be able to have children and was advised to not try, because it wasn't possible.
She was determined to be a mother, though -- and here I am. (Thanks, Mom!)
I love stories like this.
Thank you!
The term I was told is retroverted uterus. I have this as well and have twins.
I didn't know I had a tilted uterus until I was pregnant with my 3rd child. Doctors in the past didn't know as much as they do now though.
I have a tilted uterus and i have 3 children aha
It seems to run in my family, mom, sisters and I. My mom has 6 kids, my older sister has 4, my little sister has 3, and I have 1.
It doesn't effect your ability to get pregnant, but it does make you carry weight differently. Also you experience more pressure on your bladder than normal and can cause more back pain.
They used to think it did effect fertility, but they've since learned otherwise.
Em Bachelder I remember at one point my uterus looked retroverted and one doctor (of many i saw over that time period) said that you might get pregnant more* easily from that, but I couldn’t find any research to back that up. The last time I was examined they said my uterus wasn’t retroverted & was told it can move around, and it doesn’t normally impact fertility. They also said it can impact how certain sex positions feel (some are less comfortable or even painful sometimes) and stuff like that
Omg this takes me back, I always had a very regular cycle, only time I was ever even a day late was the 3 times I was preggers with my kids, so here I was 40 years old, hubby had a vasectomy after our 3rd, and I was a few days late, well I knew I was either pregnant, which the thought of it sent me into a panic attack, or menopause, well I don't think anyone ever prayed for menopause before, but I got a pregnancy test, waited till later in the day when hubby left for an out of town trip, took the test held my breath and prayed for menopause and it was negative, and it was menopause I have not had a cycle since, I know seems so young 40, but ya that's my story
This show used to be my worst nightmare! I had my tubes tied after my 2nd child and have been worry free ever since, now the fear is back!
Girl same!! The fear is real.
My twins were born 4 years after having my tubes cut 🤷♀️ definitely wasn’t expecting more babies kinda why we had done a permanent birth control 😂
Mindy Smith oh this scares the crap out of me . I had my tubes tied 4 years ago .
I'm right there with you ladies! My OB said she cut, tied and burned my tubes hopefully that gives me more protection, I doubt it though.🤞🤞💙💚
Odds are in your favor that you won't get pregnant.
I was pregnant (after a decade of infertility) at age 40 and assumed I was late due to premenopausal irregularity. 🙄🤣 I did take a test after just a few weeks, because my husband forced me. My little miracle is now 3 years old 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
SAME here!! I am 43 now and we are trying on purpose for another. My other child is 22. We want to give our 3 year old a sibling closer in age to grow up with. We are doing it IVF style after some loses though.
Starry Night Stronghold that’s awesome! I don’t think I’d have the energy for another! 🤣We’ve got a 13 year old and a three year old. Simultaneous Teen drama and toddler drama is something to behold 😆❤️ Best wishes for your family!!
I’m the type of person that gets heartburns and takes a test even if I’m currently on my period. Can’t relate. 😂
Haha sounds like me 😂 better be SURE
I’m the same after 1 surprise baby I now test over the littlest thing that could be a pregnancy symptom. Even with having an iud and not having a cycle.
I used to watch this show with my littlest (who was a surprise baby), and this is one of my favorite episodes too!
Just packed her off to 7th grade. Here's hoping no stealth babies in my future!
lol
My youngest is mr surprise too lol! He’s 7. Tubes “tied” actually cut then burned apparently.
@@teresahowick5197 me too. I had surprises twice, at 27 and 37. Didn't need another at 47!
My wife and I conceived during our honeymoon. We wanted to start a family after a year of marriage but it was still great to become parents before a year anniversary. never regretted it.
Wow! How can some women be so fertile will never cease to amaze me! I've been trying for more than 6 years, yet, no baby in sight :( That's life, I guess, *sigh*
Thank you so much for talking about that moment after your baby is born and how it's okay to not feel super in love instantly. Hope all expectant or new mamas watch this video!!
@Beast bombshell oh my goodness that's awful! They had no right to "force" you to do skin to skin 🤦🏼♀️ also, congratulations on baby #3 💕 I have one baby boy who is almost one. Once he popped out I had been awake for 48 hours and hadn't been able to keep anything down for 48 hours. I also lost quite a bit of blood during the delivery so I was definitely more thrilled about being done with laboring and pushing than the fact that he'd just been born 😂 As soon as I had eaten I was like "oh hey! My baby's here and freaking adorable!!" 😂🥰😍 THEN I started slowly falling in love with him!
@Beast bombshell My daughter hated kangaroo care. Hated it, hated it, hated it. I had to call it quits, she was screaming so much. Everyone is different, including babies.
Unplanned doesn't mean unloved 🥰 I adore the response and support by the whole family!
Whenever I see people convince themselves not to see a doctor because it's like acknowledging that something's wrong or because they're scared, I think "isn't it scarier if something IS wrong and you don't get treatment?"
American healthcare sucks tho and sometimes people avoid going to the doctor even if it’s an emergency solely because they can’t afford it
I'm an American with no insurance. If I had a couple of thousand dollars to get tested for cancer... I wouldn't have the money to treat it. Sometimes you just don't want to know. Chemo is expensive.
Alyssa Gu Yes...I always have this ridiculous fear sometimes that if I have a little thing that could have larger repercussions that if I don’t go a doctor to get it checked out I might die. Sorry, it sounds a little confusing.
When I had insurance I used to go to the doctor for my worrisome symptoms... now that I dont have it, I've found many many things just pass. I took too much medicine as a younger person.
If I do get cancer, well... I'd say it was my time and be at peace with that. And as other poster said-- cant afford chemo anyway (nor would I take it, its poison).
I've avoided the Dr mainly because I'm pretty sure they will ignore me and blow me off and that is just devastating when your having chronic pain or issues..
Hey! I’m a trans guy and just stumbled across your channel in my recommended. It would be great if you could do a video focusing on trans men and their vaginal health and maybe what they can expect from a visit to the gyno, reproductive system risks associated with testosterone therapy, if they should maybe be tested more often than women, etc. There’s so little information on this and I’m pretty young and nervous 😅
Carson Walter upvote! Let’s get some info for the trans community
I’m a trans man too and I relate real hard lol.
@mamadoctorjones
katie Schwartz ma’am you are confused
katie Schwartz sis they are ftm
I had my tubes tied after my 2nd child was born and barely even have sex , yet here I am somehow 6 months pregnant with my 3rd. Definitely a surprise!
I’m almost in tears the “it’s okay too” speech 😭💔❤️
I had an unplanned pregnancy in my mid 30's and all I felt was fear. When he arrived I screamed, "Oh hell no, Mom get me social services." The doctor gave me the death stare but I was terrified. It took some therapy and a few months to come to terms with this huge life change. For me, it took a while. Women lie lol it's not a Huggies commercial for everyone.
The doctor should have been more understanding
My cousin had a similar experience, at 30 she was single and pregnant (not planned) and told me that when she started pushing my little cousin out, she just freaked out and told the nurse she'd changed her mind and didn't want to do it anymore lol. The nurse yelled at her that it was too late and she didn't have that choice anymore, and PUSH! It was harsh but it was what she needed to hear. In her case though, she said as soon as he was out she loved him fully and she would never forget the feeling of him in her arms for the first time.
On, like, day 3, I turned to my husband and said, “Let’s send the baby back.” He said, “Ok, honey. We’ll do that, but maybe we can wait a couple more weeks,ok?”
@@juniper617 lol! that's so sweet.
@@NarnianLady It worked ok. She’s about to turn 26. 🥰
I’m 39 and I don’t even want to start all over. I love these parents. I hope I would be able to be like “yay! 18 more years of having a kiddo at home!” If this would happen to us . I love being a mom but I am also looking forward to being with my husband and just having the nest to ourselves in a few years.
I'm 38. My oldest is 15, youngest is 7. The idea of starting over terrifies me.
I would be ecstatic if I thought I was dying, but I was really just pregnant.
... I'd rather be dead. But I really don't want children or to go through labor, and I have severe depression, so I am pretty sure that's just me being dramatic. :p
If she's had kids before, wouldn't she recognize the severe pain as labor?
Emma Loura Not If her other pregnancies were planned deliveries. If she had inductions or c sections with epidurals, she’d never feel labor.
@@Em_Elizabeth Every labor is different.
I think I would enter a new level of despair if I found out I was pregnant instead of dying.
My mom Had her tubes tied and I was born sooo here I is world lol
Jess the glitter boss Webb omg so was my little brother he’s 4 months old now
Same
well fuck I wanted to tied my tubes bc I don’t want a child but now it seems it doesn’t work huh
I knew a kid that was born this way
Same. I'm 33. My mom's tubes were tied for 10 years.My mom found out @4 months. She said she was extremely shocked.
Thank you for talking about the "immediate connection" or lack there of. I remember my mom was holding my son after the birth and was like do you want him back and I was like nope I'll nap lol. I can laugh now but I felt ashamed for so long about how I felt after. It was hard and it took time but thanks to people like you speaking out I know it doesnt make me a bad mom!
Thank you soooo much for talking about your bonding experience ! I have four kids and each baby brought it's own unique situation for me.
You're 18???
Why does the husband and wife look like they could be twins? 😂
MsKermithefrog I was looking through the comments to see if anyone was going to mention this 😂
I thought for some reason she was playing both parts for a second! 😂
@@chelseamae7 me too!😭
Small production budget... it's the same person.
Apparently it is instinctual to be attracted to someone who looks similar to you ... something to do with genetics, laws of attraction ... and one word I am completely spacing on. You know the stories of relatives falling in love only to find out they’re related? It’s similar to that.
As a mom who has an adopted son, an easy pregnancy singleton and high risk twins that needed a NICU stay, I think a lot of the "love" that is immediately felt is directly linked to fear. I love all my kids the same amount but I came out fighting immediately for the ones that needed me more and it probably could be seen as more love.
Please do a baby Essentials video and a what I packed in my hospital bag video
Yeah I have a 3 month old and a weird obsession with baby essentials videos lol please do one!
A big jar of bubble bath for the room tub. Highly recommend lol
@@h.r.9563 There's a big tub in the room I'm going to be delivering in, and boy do I just want it for a nice bath for myself.
When I was a kid I always wished that my mom’s tubal ligation didn’t work so that I could have a baby sister 😂😂
I love what you said about not automatically feeling starry eyed love for the baby
Weirdly enough, I just found out that my dad’s cousin got her tubes tied, and just got pregnant. Even the husband got his done. But the odds of them getting pregnant, according to their doctor, were about 0.00175%. (Or something around that.)
That's kind of how I felt when I was pregnant with my twins (first pregnancy). I loved them but I didn't feel attached to them (in-utero) because I didn't "know" them.
I had twins too! I did feel like I kind of knew them because we got to see them almost every week through ultrasounds, but didn't feel a deep love yet.
@@ThatOneLadyOverHere I had tons of scans too. I knew their habits and things like that but didn't "know" them, it's hard to explain.
I get it. I think that was my experience. Although, honestly the first 3-5 months of their lives is such a blur that I don't really remember.
I have twins but felt attached from the minute I knew I was pregnant.
Thats how I felt about my son all the way up until a few days after his birth. I had a few scares during my pregnancy and I think I was so worried about everything after - how he was eating/sleeping/pooping/etc - and getting it all *right* that I didn't stop to let myself really FEEL the love I had toward him until a few days after I brought him home.
I love your mom honesty. I love you giving props to ppl in the stories and the mental health help you unknowingly/soft knowingly provide is amazing. I wish I had a doctor like you, honest about the hard stuff. Definitely felt the same about my littles. and I love them and enjoy everyday learning who they are. thank you for these comments and thoughts. Thank you for taking the time to "watch TV with me" during your very busy life. I don't know how you do it with 4, I have 3 and they run me in circles. it's the best kind of tired.
OMG, when I had my son, I felt the same "oh hi, nice to meet you" feeling, and thought there was something Wong with me because I didn't love him as a person immediately. I loved him as family, and like you said, I would have stood in front of a bus for him, but I needed the time to get to know him. Here's going to be 10 this year, and until I watched this video, I thought there was something wrong with me.
paranoiaprincess that didn’t ever happen to me but I think it makes sense when it does. It’s a whole new being. It’s all so scary. You’re new to each other. I think it was more weird that I didn’t take more time to get to know each kid.
“I think her menopause is going to have a heartbeat” 😂
The part about the ER dr made me laugh because of my mom’s experience with me. She didn’t realize she was in labor, that’s how chill it was. Works all morning, out to lunch around 1pm with one of my future godmothers (I have four) and she’s the one that told my mom “you’re in labor and we need to leave now.” They go to the hospital through the ER, it’s the door they were closest to. Walk in talk to the check in nurses at the desk and everyone (like five people) yelled “don’t push!”. Wheelchair to maternity, within 15 minutes I’m out. She gave birth half dressed in her business suit. I’d like to point out I’m her SECOND kid and joke about “how didn’t you know? You’d already done this before. 😂 I was almost born in a Mexican restaurant, ironic (mom’s background is mostly Mexican).
They did a pregnancy test on me before they put in my IUD, and they charged me $52 for a URINE. PREGNANCY. TEST.
So, like... if your periods stop for some reason, I suggest taking a pee stick at home first yo.
Addison Curry #montheNHS
Phew, thank god I live in Canada as they also did one on me. I also had to get a second IUD 2 months after my first one because it was half way out of my cervix 😅
They’ll still do a pregnancy test at the doctor even if you already took one at home unfortunately, at least that’s always been my experience.
Meanwhile at planned Parenthood, they charged me $10 and even admitted that it was the same pregnancy test I could buy for $5 at Walmart lmao
Tia Beckingham Yep, they won’t just take your word for it. They’ll want you to do their test to confirm.
0:40 Are we all just going to ignore those eyebrows?
Apparently so 😂
Teenage right of passage is to have photo documentation of some kind of fashion you'll be horrified by when you're 30.
@@khills it's rite of passage, like from ritual, not a right
The more you know :)
@@MrsJolene- And iPhones have their own mind on spelling, which most folks also know. 🙄
I was literally just 'BROWS'-ing the comments to see if I was the only one 😄😄😄
Her description of not having an instant bond right after birth was really helpful. I've had two babies and I was really enamored with their survival, but it took some time to get to know them. Theyre my favorite people ever now! I quit working to be with them full time.
I love that you talked about the baby bond. I immediately, immensely bonded with my daughter. My son, it took about 6 weeks for that same bond and I felt like a terrible mother!
It's all hormonal. We can't control our hormones. I highly doubt you were a terrible mother!
I know what you mean. When I gave birth to my first, I struggled to bond with him a little bit, but in my case, I think it was mostly me being afraid to be a bad mom to my 'perfect' little baby. Now my son and me are perfect little homies. I literally don't even sing adult songs any more! That's how much I'm listening to his nursery rhymes 😅😭😂
I love your honesty and education for women! I asked on Twitter but can you do one of these for ER season 1 episode 19? I want your take, and to see your reactions! As a l&d nurse I yelled at the TV. It is on HULU, and a train wreck of OB emergencies that could have been avoided. Great info there for teaching! Can't wait to see more videos! Also will you ever speak to miscarriages, termination (so many reasons including incompatibility with life) still birth, and greiving from the perspective of an OBGYN? Also in that realm premature babies, and micro preemies and the ethics and emotions that you may struggle with as a doctor and a mother?
Jeani S. Beachwood I love everything about this comment!! I really hope she’ll do it!
Oooh I want to watch this one now. 😂
This is an amazingly in-depth comment and I would pay my hard earned money to watch every second of an episode(s) that had any of those topics in it/them.
YAS! I told her that in another episode just a few days ago! I listed a few ER episodes, but this one was top of the list. (Ok, kind of because I was going in chronological order lol. I even watched it again yesterday on Hulu. It was *intense.* I see why it won so many Emmys.)
@@darlinggirl8970 me too! Of all the OB episodes this one gets me every time, both for the medical and the emotional, I cry and yell!
I find it hilarious that you said, "RUclips will implode." Then used an explosion graphic lol.
I just had a dream last night that I was pregnant and didn't know it. As I carried my newborn baby girl out of the hospital, she was whispering, "Pizza... pizza... pizza..." 🤣
Music Is A Rainbow i had a dream i had a baby; didnt want it, chucked it in a fire and when I pulled it out it had turned into a rotisserie chicken 🤔😂😂😂
@@TheQueenThatSlays lol WOW
I was the same when I had my son. I loved him immediately because he was mine, but my mother-in-law kept asking “isn’t he the best? Don’t you just love him so much?” And I couldn’t say “I love him but I don’t know him yet” out loud
That’s the cutest baby naming story that I’ve ever heard too! Lovely story for him to tell all of his life ❤️
In regards to not feeling “connected” to your baby as soon as their born.
I had a very unplanned “impossible” pregnancy. (PCOS messed my ovaries UP) and I was a single mom from the day I found out I was pregnant. Had a very traumatic L&D almost died twice and when they gave her to me for the first time the first thing I felt was a switch flip and I immediately went into a weird instinctual survival mode rather than love at first sight. Took me a few days to feel that strong bond and convection. I was scared out of my wits because it was just me and her alone at home with no help and I was recovering from a botched C-Section.... but I think that made our connection stronger in the long run....
Kristen Powell my best friend was this way. PCOS, two previous miscarriages. Told she’d never carry a baby to term. Found out at 24 weeks she was pregnant with my god daughter. Horrible delivery after a 3 day labor, 200+ stitches, needed 2 units of blood. She told me one day she felt like a horrible mom because she didn’t instantly love the baby the way she was “supposed” to. It’s sad that society puts so much pressure on women like this!
*My grandma was infertile earlier in life, but had my dad and 49, and this was back the 60s. Really surprised I even exist*
Sometimes a baby is meant to be even against the odds. I love this story too. Thanks for your commentary.
My mom had me when she was 40 after being told for years that she couldn’t have kids, she said I was a miracle & I blessed her by growing my foot straight through her rib lol. They had to break her ribs to get me out... I’m now 26 & my mom’s 66, I’ve always had the oldest parent outta everyone growing up, but I wouldn’t change that for the world because I love my mom dearly. Only thing that bothers me about her age is I’m scared of losing her because I already lost my step dad so she’s all I have left. I will say good on my mom cause even tho she was so much older than everyone else’s parents she still coached my softball team for 12 years & at over 50yrs old was sliding the bases with 2 bad knees, I give that woman ALOT of credit. She takes absolutely no pain meds for anything, needs both knees replaced & has had a heart attack, she’s one tough cookie!
Btw can you do more of this series cause I’m like you I never understood how people didn’t know they were pregnant. I don’t even have sex often & took a test when my period was late due to stress & not being on birth control just because it had been a month & a half, turns out I was just super stressed which I knew, but I gained weight too & I never gain weight... must be the honey buns I’ve been eating recently LOL. On a serious note tho even tho I knew there was no chance in hell I still took a test cause it’s the smart thing to do.
Agree,i also wonder how could someone doesn't know if she is pregnant for 3 months 5months etc
SheClutches Break her ribs to get you out!? O h m y g o d
@@amanpreetkaur7227 some birth control stops your periods I havent had a period in years as I have the nexplanton implant, it wouldn't occur to me to take a test if I didn't get a period after having sex as I don't have them anyway. Side note I haven't had sex in almost 2 years so I think am good 😂😂 .................... Unless am having an elephant 😐😐