This was so helpful.. I was in a church for 12 years, my whole married life and my children's life.. We left because of spiritual abuse, I wanted to kill my self, I was broken and had no hope, I just knew I was so bad, filled with jezebel and other demonic spirits and had no future. My prayer was not being heard, all this according to my pastor. We finally broke free and has been on a 1.5 year journey for healing. We truly want a church but can't find any. When I go to one I cry so much, and I feel afraid. The churches close to us are very secular and I want a "good" church but I'm afraid to end up in the same situation that we left... And I'm afraid I will loose my salvation if I don't attend church, and what will happen to my kids 😢
Oh, my. I hate to hear what your church did to you. Time away from church will help you heal, not cause you to lose your salvation. Watch all my videos or get my book to help you recover. I have many articles at readingremy.com. I want you to heal from this abuse. Thanks for writing.
Thank God for this. Great insight. Getting involved in church triggers me. Maybe I need a break because church seems to disconnect from God because of the pressure to DO more
Thank you 😊 I look forward to another book/video specifically for Christians to be the Good Samaritan on our way to recovery. You’ll get a lot of feedback from us as well.
Do you mean you struggle with taking a time out? If so, you are not alone. It's so drilled into some people that they HAVE to be in church to please God.
Thank you for this, I was abused by my "mentor" she was very legalistic (pharisee like) and I left the church for 2 weeks and dont plan on coming back 😢
I find it interesting to hear this. The last 4 churches I have been in, have had issues. The last one took me the longest to figure out that things were wrong. But what I find most interesting is you encouraging someone to take time away to heal. Tell me, please, you touch on Abraham not having a church or Bible. I have struggled to read His Word regularly for a while now. I do read, but not regularly. If it is supposed to feed us, how do I get through this and read again. I often feel like most of what I'm reading is flat for lack of a better description.
I can't offer a formula. In my case, I felt the same way. Reading the Bible lost its meaning. It became like reading the phone book (if you remember what those are). I wasn't into just going through the motions so I quit reading it for some time. Maybe a few years, I can't remember. Then one day I picked up the Bible and read the story of Abraham, and it just came alive to me. I could see so much of my story in Abraham's story. And ever since that time the Bible has been alive to me. I think the key is to not worship any spiritual practice like Bible reading, prayer, worship services, etc. But know that God loves you, he's got you no matter what, he won't let you go, and he's doing a work in you if you keep your eyes on him. Not going to church, etc. doesn't mean you turn your back on God. In some ways, it means relying on him more because you are no longer trusting in your religious works. I hope this helps.
This helps me so much and I’ve been examining my reasons for taking a break, or even quitting this particular church for good, it those scriptures you’ve mentioned keep coming back to me. As a result, I end up forcing myself to go, which makes me have a very bad attitude, because point blank, I don’t want to be there. Is there any way you can show me where the writer in Hebrews references that the people were following after the cares of this world, and as a result he wrote that scripture? I can’t seem to find it. Thank you sooo much in advance! God bless you for your work that you are doing!
Hebrews 2:1-3 talks about them drifting from faith. 5:11ff talks about being immature. There are other verses like this showing that they needed to come back to God.
Whenever someone is injured, they take a time out to heal. They don't go into work or school. Maybe work from home. They aren't forsaking their work/school. They are focusing on healing. The same is true with church. Sometimes you need a break to heal.
I went through this when I was Visting the church of Jesus Christ. It's was because of the people who sent me through so much hell mentally have still been in the mix through technology. I'm an ex believer I do know It can never be the same after all the intentional evil and wrong from these people. I'm getting a lawyer to help get these people removed and this technology for sure.
Sometimes you have to go to extremes, like getting a lawyer, to get the freedom. I hope you can find your way back to God even if you don't find your way back to church.
I've been a pastor for 30 years. It's not a sin to not be in church on Sunday. It is good to worship with other believers if those believers are healthy spiritually. But don't let anyone lay guilt on you for not obeying their rules. Check out my other videos or books to learn more about this.
@@FRemyD The past few days I've listened to a large number of your videos. They are helpful. Thank you. I recently left my church after 29 years. It has been a painful past few years. When one is walking through things you can't see what's happening and then there is denial. I couldn't find another local church after a very diligent search. There is a lot of pain losing my church family and losing a huge part of my life. I want to be in a church family and serve again... I appreciated the validation that it was okay not to step into another church before healing occurs.
@@shannonsundby5725 I'm glad the videos have helped. There are so many people in your situation. I'm also glad to hear that you haven't given up on God or church. Just be careful choosing the next one. There's no rush.
This video shows what happens to people that don't have and actively walk with God. The Holy Spirit will not allow you to be in a toxic environment. God will not give you more than you can bare. Repent, be baptised, get filled with the Holy Spirit, walk in Christ. If you're struggling for any reason, increase your prayer life! Pray in the Spirit for longer and more often!
@@FRemyD You believe that God, dwelling in you, allows that? That's unscriptural. 1 Cor 10:13, Romans 8:11-39, Matthew 25:32 IMHO you are dealing with the unsaved. They are God conscious (sincere believers) but not filled with the Holy Spirit. I have been spirit-filled for 36 years and have exposed myself to toxic environments /people multiple times and for various reasons The one constant is that within a very short time frame (minutes to a couple of hours) God makes it abundantly clear where the problems lie. Of course you have the free will choice to suppress the Holy Spirit and turn your back on God. Bad choice right there!
I believe that we grow in discernment. Young believers can often be led astray, even with God's Spirit. They haven't yet learned to recognize the Spirit and will yield to a strong leader who says they "heard from God." They think they are being led by the Spirit because of the leader. But once you've been burned your discernment grows rapidly!
@@FRemyD The discernment IS God. When you receive the Holy Spirit you have God inside you. God discerns for you. I think you may be from the camp that feels they have the Holy Spirit rather than absolutely knows proof positive that they have the Holy Spirit. If you have the Holy Spirit you can speak in tongues. Without it, you can't. Exactly the same as the Apostles on the day of Pentecost The same yesterday, today and forever.
@@brucedavenport7016 I've been walking with God and very conscious of the Holy Spirit leading me for a long time. I have not spoken in tongues, though I believe I could if God moved in me to do so. I think there is some truth to what you say about the Holy Spirit warning us about toxic environments. I've experienced that myself. But like Remy was saying, sometimes it takes people time to grow in discernment. In my experience, that discernment relates both to what we're sensing and also to what we should do in the situation. In my own case, I believe that lack of experience and lack of thorough teaching on how to tell and what to do has affected my ability to respond appropriately when faced with a "threat." This has resulted in significant hurt. So, yes, I definitely think it's possible for true believers to end up in difficult, hurtful situations. I've experienced it myself!
As an Ex Jehovahs Witness this is very helpful.
This is great to hear!
I can't thank you enough for these videos. God bless you and your work!
I'm glad you find them helpful! Thanks for letting me know.
This was so helpful.. I was in a church for 12 years, my whole married life and my children's life.. We left because of spiritual abuse, I wanted to kill my self, I was broken and had no hope, I just knew I was so bad, filled with jezebel and other demonic spirits and had no future. My prayer was not being heard, all this according to my pastor. We finally broke free and has been on a 1.5 year journey for healing. We truly want a church but can't find any. When I go to one I cry so much, and I feel afraid. The churches close to us are very secular and I want a "good" church but I'm afraid to end up in the same situation that we left... And I'm afraid I will loose my salvation if I don't attend church, and what will happen to my kids 😢
Oh, my. I hate to hear what your church did to you. Time away from church will help you heal, not cause you to lose your salvation. Watch all my videos or get my book to help you recover. I have many articles at readingremy.com. I want you to heal from this abuse. Thanks for writing.
I just ordered your book! Thank you from the bottom of my broken heart ! God bless you Dr🇦🇺
Oh, great! You found it. Let me know what you think of it.
Thank God for this. Great insight. Getting involved in church triggers me. Maybe I need a break because church seems to disconnect from God because of the pressure to DO more
Take some time-off. Maybe visit a few churches. Get a fresh perspective. God can meet you in a special way if you invite him on your journey.
Great series. I’m so thankful! 🙏
This is really nice. I was one of the ppl who got to read your draft on this book before being published.
Oh, thanks for your help. I got such great feedback from so many people. You all added a lot to the final version!
Thank you 😊 I look forward to another book/video specifically for Christians to be the Good Samaritan on our way to recovery. You’ll get a lot of feedback from us as well.
This one is hard to wrap my brain around, but thank you!
Do you mean you struggle with taking a time out? If so, you are not alone. It's so drilled into some people that they HAVE to be in church to please God.
So true 👍👍👍👍 thank you 👏👏👏👏👏
Thank you for this, I was abused by my "mentor" she was very legalistic (pharisee like) and I left the church for 2 weeks and dont plan on coming back 😢
Sorry to hear about your mentor, but leaving is probably the right thing to do. I hope you find a healthy faith community.
@@FRemyD thank you, Lord knows where I am truly meant to be🙏🏼
Thank you
You're welcome. Thanks for commenting.
Very helpful. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and suggestions about this topic.
I'm glad you found it helpful. Thanks for letting me know.
I find it interesting to hear this. The last 4 churches I have been in, have had issues. The last one took me the longest to figure out that things were wrong. But what I find most interesting is you encouraging someone to take time away to heal.
Tell me, please, you touch on Abraham not having a church or Bible. I have struggled to read His Word regularly for a while now. I do read, but not regularly. If it is supposed to feed us, how do I get through this and read again. I often feel like most of what I'm reading is flat for lack of a better description.
I can't offer a formula. In my case, I felt the same way. Reading the Bible lost its meaning. It became like reading the phone book (if you remember what those are). I wasn't into just going through the motions so I quit reading it for some time. Maybe a few years, I can't remember. Then one day I picked up the Bible and read the story of Abraham, and it just came alive to me. I could see so much of my story in Abraham's story. And ever since that time the Bible has been alive to me. I think the key is to not worship any spiritual practice like Bible reading, prayer, worship services, etc. But know that God loves you, he's got you no matter what, he won't let you go, and he's doing a work in you if you keep your eyes on him. Not going to church, etc. doesn't mean you turn your back on God. In some ways, it means relying on him more because you are no longer trusting in your religious works. I hope this helps.
Amen 😭🙏
This helps me so much and I’ve been examining my reasons for taking a break, or even quitting this particular church for good, it those scriptures you’ve mentioned keep coming back to me. As a result, I end up forcing myself to go, which makes me have a very bad attitude, because point blank, I don’t want to be there.
Is there any way you can show me where the writer in Hebrews references that the people were following after the cares of this world, and as a result he wrote that scripture? I can’t seem to find it.
Thank you sooo much in advance!
God bless you for your work that you are doing!
Hebrews 2:1-3 talks about them drifting from faith. 5:11ff talks about being immature. There are other verses like this showing that they needed to come back to God.
@@FRemyD This helps a lot. Thank you!
It doesn't have to be a church building, but we're not supposed to forsake fellowship
Whenever someone is injured, they take a time out to heal. They don't go into work or school. Maybe work from home. They aren't forsaking their work/school. They are focusing on healing. The same is true with church. Sometimes you need a break to heal.
🙏
God bless you as you seek to recover.
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌
I went through this when I was Visting the church of Jesus Christ. It's was because of the people who sent me through so much hell mentally have still been in the mix through technology. I'm an ex believer I do know It can never be the same after all the intentional evil and wrong from these people. I'm getting a lawyer to help get these people removed and this technology for sure.
Sometimes you have to go to extremes, like getting a lawyer, to get the freedom. I hope you can find your way back to God even if you don't find your way back to church.
Are you a pastor or a biblical counselor?
So it's not sin to not be in church on Sunday mornings?
I've been a pastor for 30 years. It's not a sin to not be in church on Sunday. It is good to worship with other believers if those believers are healthy spiritually. But don't let anyone lay guilt on you for not obeying their rules. Check out my other videos or books to learn more about this.
@@FRemyD The past few days I've listened to a large number of your videos. They are helpful. Thank you. I recently left my church after 29 years. It has been a painful past few years. When one is walking through things you can't see what's happening and then there is denial. I couldn't find another local church after a very diligent search. There is a lot of pain losing my church family and losing a huge part of my life. I want to be in a church family and serve again... I appreciated the validation that it was okay not to step into another church before healing occurs.
@@shannonsundby5725 I'm glad the videos have helped. There are so many people in your situation. I'm also glad to hear that you haven't given up on God or church. Just be careful choosing the next one. There's no rush.
This video shows what happens to people that don't have and actively walk with God.
The Holy Spirit will not allow you to be in a toxic environment.
God will not give you more than you can bare.
Repent, be baptised, get filled with the Holy Spirit, walk in Christ.
If you're struggling for any reason, increase your prayer life!
Pray in the Spirit for longer and more often!
Well, I'm afraid it's not that simple. Many sincere believers end up in a toxic church. Oftentimes it doesn't start out toxic. It slowly evolves.
@@FRemyD You believe that God, dwelling in you, allows that?
That's unscriptural. 1 Cor 10:13, Romans 8:11-39, Matthew 25:32
IMHO you are dealing with the unsaved.
They are God conscious (sincere believers) but not filled with the Holy Spirit.
I have been spirit-filled for 36 years and have exposed myself to toxic environments /people multiple times and for various reasons
The one constant is that within a very short time frame (minutes to a couple of hours) God makes it abundantly clear where the problems lie.
Of course you have the free will choice to suppress the Holy Spirit and turn your back on God.
Bad choice right there!
I believe that we grow in discernment. Young believers can often be led astray, even with God's Spirit. They haven't yet learned to recognize the Spirit and will yield to a strong leader who says they "heard from God." They think they are being led by the Spirit because of the leader. But once you've been burned your discernment grows rapidly!
@@FRemyD The discernment IS God. When you receive the Holy Spirit you have God inside you.
God discerns for you.
I think you may be from the camp that feels they have the Holy Spirit rather than absolutely knows proof positive that they have the Holy Spirit.
If you have the Holy Spirit you can speak in tongues.
Without it, you can't.
Exactly the same as the Apostles on the day of Pentecost
The same yesterday, today and forever.
@@brucedavenport7016 I've been walking with God and very conscious of the Holy Spirit leading me for a long time. I have not spoken in tongues, though I believe I could if God moved in me to do so. I think there is some truth to what you say about the Holy Spirit warning us about toxic environments. I've experienced that myself. But like Remy was saying, sometimes it takes people time to grow in discernment. In my experience, that discernment relates both to what we're sensing and also to what we should do in the situation. In my own case, I believe that lack of experience and lack of thorough teaching on how to tell and what to do has affected my ability to respond appropriately when faced with a "threat." This has resulted in significant hurt. So, yes, I definitely think it's possible for true believers to end up in difficult, hurtful situations. I've experienced it myself!
ICOC / ICC IS THE WORST
I'm sorry to hear this.