I shutdown pain. I've had 3 ECGs (no known heart problems).

My name is Xanthe Wyse.
I have several diagnoses but the ones of most clinical concern are post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and bipolar disorder.
Diagnosed with the avoidance and shutdown presentation (aka childhood presentation) of PTSD.
I experience some degree of shutdowns most of the time. When severe, I can't speak, think, feel, communicate etc. Shutting down and dissociation (which can vary from mild to severe) can be a coping mechanism which numbs pain.
Partial shutdowns can include shutting down emotions and pain.
I can also be injured but not remember how I was injured (such as recent knee injury). Suspect it was from tripping as I tripped over at least 4 times this past week.
I made a few notes as mind jumping around on tangents extra, which also affects my short-term memory (my mind is hyperfocussed on links).
ADHD is ruled out for me.
I've had 3 electrocardigrams (ECGs) to check heart conditions. Instead, attributed to shock, anxiety etc. Identical symptoms to heart attack, last time I had an ECG. Shortness of breath, pressure in chest etc. Third time, I was also tested to see if I'd had a heart attack.
From my perspective, a lot of stress, yet also mostly shut down.
I've woven some medical experiences into both my self-published books, on Amazon & ebook distributors. My books are about relationships with disabilities.
'Pet Purpose: Your Unspoken Voice' (blend of memoir & fiction) highlights bipolar mania and PTSD & trying to process grief and trauma.
'Bipolar Courage: Are You Sure You're Not Autistic?' is memoir. It has the circumstances of why I was so stressed (leading to being tested for heart attack).
www.soarpurpose...
'Soar Purpose' (sequel to 'Pet Purpose') is currently underway but might take a while.

[@nseesomnia]

I have also some diagnoses. Also PTSD, Depression and Emotional unstabil personality disorder. Don´t know if i am autistic... My biggest problem in life is, i never had and i can not have any deep emotional relationships. Even not to my mother. To our family dog back in the days, and also most other animals. But to people? No!
I feel you so much! 💔

[@BipolarCourage]

I have tended to have more of a connection with non-human animals than with humans.
I don't have the energy reserves for social stuff. Plus am frequently misunderstood. So I just do my own thing.

[@pedromateus9575]

Do you have any pet?

[@BipolarCourage]

not any more as can't afford any plus don't have suitable living suitation