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The Oppression of Arab Women in the Novel A Woman is No Man by Etaf Rum | Book Review
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- Опубликовано: 17 апр 2022
- This review turned out to be longer than I expected, but I hope you enjoy it anyway :)
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ah! i read this book last year and thought it was SUPER well written.
i understand the anger of the "Offended Palestinian" goodreads profile because in western media, this is the ONLY portrayal of Arab families. so it can be frustrating to see again. however, as you said, it is a real experience. no single book can be representative of all experiences, so we just need more books that show many perspectives. we need MORE REPRESENTATION 🙌
It's my first time reading a book portraying Arab families and I'm not that much familiar with how Arab are portrayed in western media. I just found the topic of the book to be really important and need to be discussed more. And you are right we need more representation with both the good and the bad experiences 😊
I really enjoyed and appreciated this review! This book had been on my radar for some time, but now I'm more inclined to pick it up. I relate to a lot of things you said here being Muslim and being from a Muslim community even though I'm not Arab. These are difficult conversations to have because Muslims in the West are so stigmatised that acknowledging narratives that seem 'stereotypical' can feel like you're conceding to Islamophobic viewpoints. It's especially disheartening when you know that most people around you in your community are not like that. Most of the Muslim women I know are strong, independent, and control their own lives an destinies. BUT there are many women who aren't as fortunate, and there are many aspects of our cultures that are still toxic and it's important that we continue to highlight that. I also think that readers should not read a story about characters from a similar background and expect that they'll be fully represented. Your experience with a culture is not always reflective of someone else's from that culture. Thanks again for this discussion!
This comment 💯💯💯
Thank you! I would love to hear your thoughts when you read it. totally agree with every word you said!
Rana, thank you for this review, especially your contextualization of the novel's content and what is taught in Islam vs. what is considered acceptable in Arab culture. I read this book last year and thought it was quite good. I will be interested to read Etaf Rum's forthcoming book Evil Eye, too.
glad you enjoyed it! 😊
Loved hearing your thoughts on this one! I read it last year and thought it was amazingly well written, the way she showcased the cycle of abuse was heartbreaking. I remember one thing I wished for was at least one positive male Palestinian character in the book, because I think it could have showcased how this wasn’t true to every man, as you mentioned, and also could have showcased that men are a necessary part in fighting for equal rights as well. Great review!
Thank you ♥
I totally agree with you that would've made the book even better and I think it wouldn't have received such negative reviews if it did that
I really appreciate your perspective on this book and seeing you get heated up about it! It’s so true that there are huge disparities between professed beliefs in religions and other belief systems and then beliefs and actions because of culture-and that’s true of anywhere in the world. It’s always important for me though to hear perspectives from communities represented in a book to see their take so I’m really glad you shared your thoughts on the book and how it differs from your own experience.
also, im glad you mentioned the djinn because that is one of the scenes that stood out to me when i read the book. the grandma was talking to herself about how the granddaughter is speaking of all these silly western diagnoses and will never understand what is truly going on. this was SO powerful. because SO often, people who believe in spirits and such are seen as silly or unwilling. but this was from the other perspective and that just opened my eyes
Rana, thank you so much for this amazing review!! Honestly, I think any non-Arab or non-Muslim who reads this book, this video should accompany it. Everything you said was 💯. Reading this book without any context of our culture and society could confirm biased and stereotypes, which I think is what some Arab people are upset about in the good reads comments. But for many women, this story is not exaggerated and is their real life.
Yes, this isn’t the experience of all Arab women, but it as an experience of many that is constantly brushed under the rug and hushed so we don’t take about because like mentioned in the book, it’s 3eyb . Growing up in a house very similar to Deya and Isra, reading this book was kind of cathartic. To be able to continue improving as a society, we need to highlight the bad parts as well as the good. This is a super helpful video that breaks down how different experiences we have and highlights the most important lessons in the book. Thank you !
really appreciated your thoughts!! I had no idea the pronunciation of their names was Americanized
This was a great discussion. I really appreciate you giving some context to this book. I’ve never heard of it, but I’m interested in reading it now!
Hope you enjoy it when you read it :)
Thank you for your insight in the story. I loved the book. I was concerned whether or not the culture was accurately depicted and you cleared up some of my questions. In the end I believe all cultures do things that are not right and inhumane treatment of women. As we learn and acknowledge our past, we know no one should be abused or beaten into submission. When a child grows up in this type of environment, they grow up not knowing any difference. But when you are loved and you are given the opportunity to educate yourself and those around you, things change. You stand up for yourself and the oppressed. Thanks again. Look forward to the next book.
I really love how objective this review is Rana, especially the chat bit and you bringing your personal experiences into your review. I really appreciate that! I also love how frank you are about the misogyny that is still around in Arab culture AND how you highlight the switch in education rates of Arab women! Needless to say, i really love this video Rana
Glad you enjoyed it! :) ♥
I've wanted to read this book for a while now but i'm yet to get to it, partly because it doesn't immediately pull me. But i'm excited to see what you think. The generational vibe with the grandma bringing suitors reminds me of a story in the Gazan short story collection called The Sea Cloak and other stories.
Loved this review and glad I got to hear from your perspective! I totally agree with you, even if someone’s life doesn’t line up 100%, no one should dismiss it because everyone has a different experience, and everyone’s life experience is valid.
Exactly!!
Hi Rana! I really enjoyed your review! I just read and reviewed it over on my channel as well! Firstly, thank you for clarifying the pronunciation of the names in the book (I had a feeling I was butchering them😅) and thank you for clarifying the stuff about what’s happening/not happening to Arab girls today; I definitely wanted to know! So happy to hear that Isra and Deya’s story wasn’t your own! 😊
I am 60 years old and this book speaks a lot of truths that I experienced or witnessed in my life. Your review is very good. Now I want to watch more of your reviews so I have subscribed. Thank you!
Also, I am Palestinian American, who was born in America.
Hi Rana - it so interesting and useful to hear your thoughts on this book and your own experiences of some of the themes in the book. Thank you so much 😀
Haven't watched the video yet. I just finished this book and was looking for an own voices perspective of what happened within the novel. So I want to tell you I super appreciate you making this content!
Hope you enjoyed it!
I feverishly finished this book so I could watch this video. 😁 I appreciate your frankness and loved hearing your thoughts. I too really enjoyed the book and would like to read her next one. I partly listened to this on Scribd, partly read the physical book. (I’ve found it’s a great way to work my way down my enormous physical TBR, because I can read whilst cooking/cleaning/etc.)
Glad you liked it :)
thank you for reviewing this!!! i'd never even heard of this book, but your title really intrigued me and i knew this video would be informational. thank you for sharing your experiences.
You're so welcome! glad you liked it ♥😊
Great discussion video! 👌🏾👌🏾👌🏾 Issues affecting Arab/Muslim women are so overlooked, its so angering
thank you 😊
totally agree
This book sounds so interesting and I loved hearing your discussion around it!
Thank you ♥
Thank you for sharing this review! Just added you as a friend on goodreads. I'm currently reading "Evil Eye" and would love your thoughts on it!
I hated it 😅
@@rananajjar ohh no. I had a hard time with the first half but once I realized the type of book it was, I was more okay with it.
I had seen this book going around booktube when it first came out and hadn't seen many good reviews for it. Sounds like I'd have to be ready for a sad book before picking it up, but I'm more interested in picking it up now!
Hope you like it when you read it 😊
Rana, you must read The Dark Side of Love by Rafik Schami, a Syrian author who immigrated to Germany in the 1970s. It's a brilliant book and has a very interesting outlook on the Syrian Christian community
Ooh! That's sounds like a very interesting book to read. Thank you for recommending it 🤗 I just added it to my list
Thank you for your review.
I read this book yesterday and I didn't really know what to make of it, so was looking for some voices from the community itself.
(I do think that marketing it as literary fiction does the book disservice. Imo it's better suited for YA or general fiction, but whatever...)
I just fear this might be the first and only book someone reads on the Muslim/Arab experience and think this represents the only reality for Muslim/Arab women and use it to fuel their hatred/prejudice against Islam/Muslims/Arabs. 😕 I am not sure how much the average reader actively tries to diversify their reading.
I did leave a couple of recommendations in my review on GR just in case someone stumbles on it. 🤣
Thanks again for your opinion and perspective. 🤗
totally agree with your point!
but... where is your GR review? give it to me I want the recommendations!!😅
What was the ending of this book I mean if Isra has been killed then how she ran away with her four daughters can anyone explain plz?🙏
Ahhh I’ve been meaning to read this book
you should! and I hope you like it when you do
Hello friend! I just want to let you know that I tagged you in my recent video- the Book Acquiring Tag. No pressure if you are too busy or not interested in doing the tag, but I wanted to make sure you knew!
Another great review, I always enjoy your analysis of the things you read.
Hi!
Oh thank you! I'll definitely do it :)
Hi Rana very nice video I enjoy getting some inside knowledge on Arab life and customs. Women are still beaten by men sadly but it happens in all religions. In Christianity it happens a lot especially within Catholics. Now less but I think people stereotype Arabs not seeing the evil in their own religions and acting like saints. We have violence towards women problem in England too. And in Poland for example in smaller towns and cities sex before marriage is forbidden too.
And I have never heard a mother calling her daughter a whore. Its beyond my comprehension how someone can do it.
Hope your Palestinian friends are okay and safe.
Sadly, violence against women is wide spread around the globe. People are getting better with stopping it and with putting laws against it.
My Palestinian friends are all well thank to God.
@@rananajjar That is great they are safe. Yeah thanks God.
Same things happens in india(at least some parts of india) but the Western media really over do it.
I just had a Zoom call with the author n found your video that way I never heard of the book
🤣I think generally audiobooks on scribd rarely have narrators that pronounce things well.
I never noticed 🤣 I usually enjoy them
This is just my opinion so take it with a grain of salt. The problem I have with books like these is that all too often they remind me of “poverty porn” narratives. Yes, all these negative things do happen in real life but it is not whole picture. It is merely a part of it. Unfortunately, the negative part of the picture is the one often highlighted in popular media because drama and suffering sells. This negative narrative then gets repeated until it becomes the whole picture and not merely a part of it.
I’m not trying to discount the negative experiences of people but I would want a more nuanced narrative that would show the diversity and richness of the Arab woman experience.
Totally agree with you! maybe it didn't bother me that much because it's my first time reading such a book so I felt like it discussed something I never read about before in literature. The most similar book I read is A Thousand Splendid Suns and I adore that book.
Seeing more nuanced narrative and books discussing the good life of Arab women would be great too!
But it the book Etaf shows the happy families too, for example, Nadin is happy because she has a voice and can speak against Farida. Also book shows how Haled and Farida became sorry for what they have done to Isra and Adam. And also there is a huge hope in the end of the book, so it is not a negative porn. And I can tell you out of the experience, that girls who face such kinds of situacions need to cope with this trauma for the rest of their lifes. It takes psychologist to recover, I know it myself as in my family my mother repeated the fate of her mother, and my sister is repeating now the fate of our mother, I mean, their husbands treated and treat them like shit. But I escaped and left home at 16. But afterwards it took me 15 years to understand why my family was like that and only now, by the age of 31, I am close to the understanding of what should I do in order not to repeat the fate of my sister, my mother and my grandmother. And I am not Arabian at all, I am slavic woman.
Also I would like to add, that writters write about tradgic things not because they want to be sold, but because these things need to be addressed. Why should anyone write or read about anything that is good and cool? If something is cool why should it be changed? this is the reason why no one wants to read about good things, because they are already good enough. But tradgic stories make you think, make you change for the better. Thus we may achive the life where there be no tragic stories.