Caring For Persons With Dementia - 5 Things To Avoid
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- Опубликовано: 16 окт 2024
- www.MindInMemor... Caring For Persons With Dementia - 5 Things To Avoid When Caring For People With Dementia. Cindy Keith is going to give you free information about how to Care For People With Dementia.
Great tips. I have to admit, I have acted this was towards my grandma. I quit school and work to watch her full time and I would get frustrated why my other family members where not contributed when I have sacrificed so much. Recently I went back to school, graduated and got a government job. At this point, I regret it very much. I should have been caring for my grandma. She is so much worse now that I'm gone. I am also having trouble affording the caregiver. I just want to quit my job and go back to caring for her 24/7. She needs me.
You're a star to your GM, but you have to have your own life too.
Korra Lopez this is me right now and it's so hard . I don't even know what to do but I know I love my grandmother. I don't even know where to begin to live or how too😢
Korra Lopez
Bless you Korra, I hope your life situation has gotten better. Your Grandma wouldn't want you to deny yourself. I am certain you will find the balance to do what your heart wants. I too care for my Mom, with no added help and it is very heartbreaking to see your love one become so helpless. Much love
well, this is me too right now. it happen to my dad, and my step mom kind of leaving him. me and my sister are struggling to take care my dad. she has to finish the university and both of us has to work to afford living as well to pay for tuition fee of our little brother. you know what, this too will pass and we'll be glad we did this. so, life is hard, then just smile so everything will feel like it's easy. 😊
Korra Lopez god bless you!!!!
Thankyou so much. I appreciate this video and will be using it as a reminder. It's hard handling my grandmother alone whilst everyone else thinks it's okay to neglect her.
The burden placed on a caregiver can be immense when dealing with these patients. Thanks for these insightful strategies!
very practical advice. Stuff I've learned the hard way. But I forget sometimes, thanks for the reminders!
OMG! Your video has been more helpful than any of the training at our facility. I'm going to share this video, your website and book title with my co-workers, including administrators. I'm a PT and work with a huge population affected by dementia. Thank you!
Everything you have mentioned is what happened with our mother whom we have been caring for now the past three years. It is so hard watching her as the horrible disease advances and knowing there is nothing medicine can do. Thanks for sharing the video.
Here's something to try that sounds promising ~ ruclips.net/video/yxR24JMAE0c/видео.html
this is great. i work at a religious center, where numeraries live.. This includes 84 year old Joan, with dementia. I take care of her often and help her almost every day. Shes funny, and smart. She talks like a text book, remembering exact dates and events so vividly, but sometimes cant remember where her room is or if she is upstairs or downstairs. She tells the best stories. This is helpful, thanks!
I work with dementia..and I love it. everyday is so different.I looked after a lady who thought she was on a cruise ship. for 3 years.and her Mum and Dad was going to pick her up.after the cruise.she eventually died in her sleep.thinking she was on a cruise ship..what a way to go. god bless..in dementia you have to live in the world.not yours.
Thanks for sharing the video. Wish I had seen the video earlier as I have been taking care of my mum with dementia for the past 2 years and I have experienced all of the 5 things to avoid with my mum. Now I am public enemy number 1 with her and she always has to get confirmation with others whenever I tell her anything. I learnt the hard way, what I can or cannot say or do.
blessings to you ma'am your suggestions are very helpful.
I have dementia vascular dementia. And my caregiver has watched lots of videos and read books to be ready when the time comes. Thank God she will be with me unless I get combative. But we can work it out where I don't get combative. A whole sad thing that hurts my heart the most is I won't know who my family are. ... But it is the cards I was dealt and I just have to deal with it the best I can. I am getting ready to start mushroom therapy. And hopefully it works. I love my caregiver and I wouldn't want anybody else. I pray someone will find a cure.
I live with and care for my grandma who suffers Alzheimer's. This is such great advice you provide! I should have looked up this information months ago. I feel like it will be invaluable. SO many situations, really every situation, has seemed so hopeless. But maybe if I follow these rules it will help prevent so many issues we have been having. Thanks for posting!
My dad had Alzheimer's and subsequently died from that disease and I know how difficult it is to live with a person who has advanced stages of Alzheimer's
*tears* Thank you. You now understand where I went wrong while dealing with my mother's Alzhimer's early stages. I'm working on doing better dealing with her, but it's so hard at times. My father is still in denial of her mental state and I fear he won't be able to care for her as she's slowly getting worse. I really don't want to have to take care of their financial parts of the house when I myself are trying to move out on my own again. *HUGS* Thank you.
Try smiling for someone who hates you and always tell you no.Maybe that will bring a smile on your face.I feel so much anger,she's not even that old.I lost her too soon.She's dead,i can't feel her presence,she is not herself.She is an illusion of a person and I am not even married yet.
Very nice tips. I am a personal care giver for a woman with Alzheimer’s. She is only 62 and lives with her 30 year old son and 26 year old daughter. Both are wonderful kids. The son gets stressed when his mom wants explanations for things that would take a long time, so he always says “don’t worry about it mama, just don’t worry” well, she worries. I’m trying to gently teach him how to interact with her, so he doesn’t end up feeling terribly afterwards. He’s doing the best he can.
thank you so much for all information i am very appreciate please don't stop its a pleasure to know more about Alzheimer's Dementia
Thank you Cindy! Great tips
Ive heard you should encourage memories and not force them into the present, because it can be confusing
WOW! Great video! Great advice! These are HARD lessons that I had to learn over time in dealing with my mother. Viewing it as "It's the brain damage talking" is the best way of allowing yourself to deal with people who suffer dementia in a caring, non-destructive way.
Unfortunately, this is a big issue that many people are too embarrassed about to discuss and are usually driven to their wit's end because of not having been tutored in proper coping methods. Thank you for your sage advice.
I wish I had found your video when I cared for my mum
Thank you I need to hear this.. I didn't know how to deal with my dad. He has dementia and this is new to me .. I'm struggling with my dad ..
This was wonderful, care giving for my mother in law wasn't easy but I am so glad I had the opportunity to ease her last years.
Some people have the patience to interact with the elderly and some people don't. It is the same with interacting with children...some have the gift and some don't. We all can learn better ways of doing interactions but I truly believe that being an excellent elder caregiver is a gift....a talent and those of us that do not have the gift need to leave it to and appreciate those who do. God bless them!
my mom has went down hill a lot in the past 3 months she argues with me constantly over things I don't understand it's put a lot of strain and stress on our family.
I wish I had seen this video a couple of years ago. Would have helped an awful lot. I lost my mom on 1/14/12 to this disease. I only knew she had it a year before she passed. At that time she went from state 4, and a year later progressed to state 7. Thank you for sharing - I hope it can help others.
You did a fantastic job in yur presentation. Short but to the point, packed with the most important things to avoid. Thank you
Very good! My mother in law is now in this stage. Thank you I just forwarded it to my husband.
Thank you Cindy for creating this video, I think is very helpful for those trying to understand living or working with those suffering with Dementia, I am sure your book is a great book.
MUCH easier said than done. As far as the smiling and being calm with the way you talk. This woman talks like the caregiver should always be able to think logically themselves.
Its not always that simple sometimes you have to walk away and take 5-10 min out to gather your thoughts otherwise you become totally stressed and that isnt going to help anyone. I have had to walk away from those that I care for so that I dont upset them and treat them as a child, I feel its better to walk away take some time out and return when feeling more calm
I have to walk away a LOT too. My mom loved putting me down and arguing with me WAY before dementia and it is really hard to not take it personally.
Thank you for all the help in the flower garden pulling up weeds dad. Then you go out the next day and there's not a single flower standing! And with a genuine smile on his face, dad says, I got rid of the rest of those darn weeds for you. Maybe they need to hear the word no sometimes, followed by an explanation.
Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, and Yes. Listen to this woman! Great advice.
Thank you so much, my mother and I have to care for my nana now because she's just been diagnosed with dementia.. (I'm 15 and shes 37)
Sometimes, like you said, we just have to pick our battles. I noticed my hubby cutting the roses way down, like you would do in December or January (where we live). They are just plants, they will survive, if not, we will just plant others. Everyone in the neighborhood knows he has Alzheimer's. He used to keep the yard immaculate. He still works out there most days, it gives him something to do and if they don't like it, they can turn their heads.
I was considering brining my Mom to my grandson's wedding ........because I know she wants to be there.....but I also know she gets confused after a ride to the store sometimes. It seems her riding span is becoming shorter and shorter. I realize now, it's my selfishness that wants her there at her Great Grandson's wedding. Will be hard to attend without her, but I see now it would be best. I love my Mamma so very much. I just want to do all the right things even if they are hard to do. I pray for strength.
I have just tried to listen to your advice. I found it impossible to hear as there was background music which as I am deaf(I have good hearing aids),I could not hear!!
I also tried to shift from one screen to another and I finished up with 2 programmes running together. I am now hearing as one of the programmes has either completed or given up.
Probably my fault as I should have cancelled the first one before getting the second.
A good feature of your website is that you give precedence to those who have raised money,
rather than keep asking for donations. Thank you. I shall visit the website again.
i wish I could show this to my mom...one of my grandmothers is suffering with Alzheimer's. My mom is NOT a natural caregiver, and I watch her struggle with trying to reason and "discipline" my grandma into doing things a. the way she used to and b. the way my mom thinks she should do it. It is this endless cycle and hard to watch. Its not healthy for either of them. She would be very personally hurt if I sent this, however.
Thank you so much, great information. Maybe now we can get somewhere with 'problem behaviours' if more people listen to you.
Thanks for the video, breakfast is actually the easiest so far, I ask her "scrambled or fried". Rest of the meals are a challenge but I was thinking of getting a list together from her, and getting my dad to buy various basics and like breakfast offer just a couple choices so as not to overwhelm her, but make her feel included in the choice and feel like being treated as a child, it is a very difficult balance. I posted it on FB for my siblings and dad, hopefully it helps.
Good video...and yet....it can be so hard to be the caregiver...especially when there is just one person taking care 24/7 .
Good tips ! thanks
she's talking about the earlier stages..the more advanced and end-stage they get, the worse it gets. and each day will be pure hell for the caregiver.
Direct, to the point, informative. Thank you.
This is so very true and very difficult for all involved!
Thank you ! These are good to keep in mind.
This is very helpful information that everyone needs to know.
Thank you....i needed to see this right now.... youre an angel
Bless you ...you are so helpful❤️
I found this really useful....thank you
Thank you, that is very useful.
Wonderful Video very helpful to a new Caregiver
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you
Thanks so much for this - very helpful.
Thank you very much! Very true and helpful! Well done!
*****
Thank you very much Leslie !! ∞
Thank you for your help
This is great thank you
My grandmother had dementia. My mom would constantly argue with grandma, telling her "no", or telling her, "that's wrong". I told my mother that grandma has dementia and that she was only making the situation worse. Grandma would ask, "where's my purse? where's my husband?, etc." Mom would rashly reply, "you don't need your purse", "dad is dead". I kept telling my mom to stop answering like that. She said, "I know, I know. " Well, mom, if you "knew", then you would know that saying those things doesn't help, in fact, it just makes her situation worse. I said you are going to need to modify how you reply to grandma. It's not a lie to deceive her. What you have to do is reply so that she is kept peaceful and happy. Mom never learned how to do that. Grandma passed on, thankfully, not able to communicate or know that we were with her. The only reason I saw that is because I saw my grandmother get upset and frustrated with things people were saying. It broke my heart to see her confused and unable to recognize us. Hoping that my mother doesn't develop dementia. I wouldn't wish that on anyone.
Thank you!
I have a HUSBAND WITH THIS demention..vs..stroke..it..is..really..hard..for..me..he..brings..me..to..tears..with..his..behavior..have..to..find..help..soon.The..angry..is..scary..no..matter..what..i..say..or..how..i..say..it..have..to.get..away..from..him..his..angry..frightens
.me..
Good practical advice.
Excellent!
However practical and well intentioned this advice may be, it's effect is to encourage caregivers to sacrifice themselves and accept abusive treatment
elationship for the increased comfort of their demented spouse\family member. The demented person 's comfort should not take precedence over health and quality of life of the caregiver. The demented person is not the only person who matters.
',
Insisting, you mean like not eating? This is an absolute nightmare, trying to get my grandmother of 89 to eat. There is a point where hurting feelings has to take a back seat. Everyone says "You cant force her to eat!" So people give her very little, and a damn Ensure, as if thats a whole meal in a bottle.
Is it possible for a person with dementia knows and aware that she is being forgetful? I asked my mom a question, she said, "I don't know the answer, I'm very forgetful lately."
thank you
Thank you this helped 🙏
Helpful! Wish it was louder
Very good!
Hi thanks, my mom keeps misplacing her Id and bank card and thinks someone stole it, she will then take all day or days to find them she will not give them to me, and gets very mad when she cant find them we go over this weekly and at times daily when she does find them I get real happy and think this is the last time she will misplace them? Do you have suggestions....
Thanks
What a lovely woman.
Good stuff. Just know that sometimes nothing works. Exhale. Let the need to work everything out go. Care for yourself or you’ll collapse on the job. Then what? Dementia does not get better. Only you, the person without the diagnosis., can get better. YOU are now the cognitive twin, the memory bank. If you are a family member or friend, I wouldn’t try this alone everyday. Get some help, depending on stage: professional nursing care two-?three times a week and others who can visit as scheduled or take your loved one on a pleasant outing. Expect the unexpected - always. No one wants to talk about the terrible hygiene. It is hard to hug someone with a terrible stench. Be realistic. All in the timing.
How a few hours anaesthesia influence on brain? Instead 10 -12 minutes my mother was under anaesthesia for about 4 hours. For all week she was sleeping and feel like it was the same day. It was not necessary. I can't believe. She trust her doctor. This surgery takes not longer than 12 minutes. I feel angry. If somebody know please let me know. Maybe some links to information.
Hey, Iv been looking after my Grandad who is in the severe stages of alzheimers, I use to love looking after him at the beginning believing it was my responsibility and all that, but now its in the severe stages he crapes where he wants is completely dependant on me, and I have just lost all the feelings of care and respect for him, and its been replaced with hatred, obviously I never take it out on him or anything, but he is dominating my life, and im wondering more and more every day why the hell im looking after this shell of a person, my question is to carers, how do I stop thinking like that I don't want to, but I just hate him, and obviously I want to stop but I cant, any advice anyone.
I wish I could help you feel better. I am in a similar place. This site helps me www.agingcare.com/Caregiver-Forum. You do have to register, but there is a lot of info and support. Good luck and be sure to do some things for yourself. You are a good person and you will be thankful that you helped him when he is gone. You will know you did the best you could and you were there for him.
o I know how you feels, but somehow I was wishing that our old man are like the others, who has Alzheimer's and still act like a caring person right?, I mean we don't care if they are kind a type of forgetness person, but added with anger along with the bad attitude I would hate the person to, I suggest look at the bright side he has nobody except you and besides what ever we say they are still our grandpa ( knock the wood) if ever he reaches his limit to live, I believed we will still have some tears in our eyes, :)
I know it is hard, I did it for my mother in law who could be very abusive. I just thought of her as one of God's children and thought that this may very well be me one day. How would I want to be treated? Good luck to you and bless you for what you are doing.
So true
Caregivers often act very pig parent to child dementia person. Live in the present. Read to them: newspapers, books. Don't show them off to others vis a vis how much and who they have forgotten. Wake up, people. What could be worse than losing your mind? Constantly being reminded that it's gone.
Do you have any tips on stroke patient I'm my husband care giver and it's hard to deal with it affected part of his brain I know he's my husband but he's different 😂
You know my mum alway telling us I don't want to go to my sister so iv said to my sister mum don't want to. Come to you will you come here then my mum talks to my sister and my sister sparks her why don't you want to come here then my mum tells her of course I want to come then my sister calling me a LIER so now even though I know she hates going there's nothing I can do to stop it iv tried telling my sister how it's but she unaware or should I say don't want to believe mums got dementia she is in denial and it causes me a lot of problems
Very sad too bad they can't find the Cure my mother-in-law has dementia very hard on my wife and her family
Hi Cindy I am 20 years old taking care of a great grandmother with devoloping demintia she constantly insists that people are breaking in and taking her things and or moving them and then finding them later is there anything I can say to have her see that no one is braking in so she feels more secure??
Hi Cindy, You're a wonderful person to be undertaking this task. It's a very difficult road ahead for both you and your great grandmother and your best way to cope is to have help and to educate yourself as much as you can. Both of these things can start with you contacting your nearest Alzheimers or Dementia organisation. They will give you advice and tell you who can help you.
The problem you are experiencing, with your gran accusing people of theft is a very common one. It is because she has forgotten where she's put things and has even forgotten that she's forgotten! So she's scared and worried and assumes the only reason she can't find stuff is because someone must have stolen it. You might be able to help her by firstly UNCLUTTERING her living areas. Do it slowly if necessary so she doesn't get distressed about the loss of stuff. Then keep the things she needs for day to day living close by and handy. Where she can reach them.
If she thinks something is missing, don't argue with her. Simply say something like "I will help you look for it" or distract her with "Don't worry, it's nearby, how about *a snack* now". Dementia is very scary for the person who has it and it is horrid for caregivers because most of the time the person seems fairly normal and just being nasty or stubborn or spiteful. They are not though, they can't help being how they are. Good luck.
If the items are near where she is, you could try and say something like, Hey look! I found your ....whatever it might be. I have someone who is always asking where their stuff is, and I have pointed to it, or say I have your bag/clothes or whatever, and I show them where it is.
🙏thankyou🙏
im lost....thank you
Like it very frustrated because I can't remember things, it is very frustrating to a person with Alzheimer's or dementia. That's why I get angry
Yo7 have given me an EXTRA UMPH.That I needed an extra voice in my head other than ME...... AND MY PROblems.
can't hear it...
Singing Happy Birthday can change an angry mood.
Easier said than done.
hi i hope someone could help me, we have a person in our family who is 84 years old, He has this kind of routine everyday he has been telling a big LIE story about an specific persons, and he keep blaming my aunt, but then when I found the truth and ask a couple of person who he saying they've been kick out, these person says no that aint truth, we never get kick out from the house, it was us who decided to leave. plus he always talk by him self and screaming for no reason he always feel insecure when other people help to do house work,like if he see someone using a vacuum to clean up, he will get it and try to teach you what to do, and even though you say lets take a break, he don't wanna stop, the crazy part is at late night he go try to wash some laundry while people asleep, and he didn't know that the wash room is only open at morning and afternoon/evening. he leaves the door open and unlock. He can still walk and lift about 20 pounds that's why I am asking, what is the potential risk in our life having him around?
to take care of people with dimentia...you have to have heaps of patience...and if you don't...then you better find somebody that does. It is so hard to take care of one person with dimentia 24/7...you cannot do that. You must have other carers besides yourself. alot of times you have to distract a person with dimentia...for example you might not say..it is time for a shower...but you might say....it is time for heat therapy...sometimes when you are in a facility...people want to leave and go home....so they want to catch the bus....one nursing home put a fake bus stop outside and everyday the lady would wait for the bus with a carer and the bus didn't come and the carer said, well I think we missed the bus...maybe we can catch it tomorrow...then the person would go back into the facility and the carer would get her to do something else...the problem is..once they get their mind fixed on something...you just cannot always get them to change...so you have to be very creative.....find old music they love....but if you hate caring for somebody...you better change it. I was a carer for 8 years and I had to deal with feces alot..soiled clothes...that is part of the job and if you can't have the heart to do it...then you better not or at least get another carer to help you. People with dimentia respond to love and sometimes...I really felt love for them....I used to go to one man that just wouldn't eat or forgot to eat...so I knew that when he was younger...he used to raise dogs and have dogs around and used to bring them to competitions....so I brought my little dog to his house and totally distracted him...and then I said ...have you got some sandwiches...let's eat some together and we can talk about my dog...and so he did...you never know what will distract them.....but you have to try different things...that is one of the keys of working with people with dimentia...learn to distract them for their own good.
try coconut oil
I forgot to tell you that the families can be more problems than the patient lol
Levy body dementia
St hanks
yes , that too old people are so crazys, ah
Umm this vid is for the angry type. Not all people with this condition.
My mom is in early stage Alzheimer's and she keeps sending out checks to all kinds of scam charities and lotteries she never even entered to get her prize. She used to be so smart and a loving mother to her 6 children and husband. Now she gets angry at the drop of a hat, falls for any sleezy salesperson who mentions God or Veterans no matter what outrageous price they quote her and worst of all she is now a Donald Trump fan even though for many years she told me she could not stand that greedy, egotistical womanizer. Sad.
161 People Are Unreasonable
Why don't they just find a cure for it already? It's 2014!
A cure for ageing? No such thing.
Why not? That is what they said about many other things 100 years ago. I mean we are doing things today that would have been looked at as science fiction 100 years ago, so why not? Our technology SHOULD come up with something. Stem cells seem to be promising. There is little doubt something can be found, NOW whether or not they will RELEASE it to the public is something else. Yeah I do kinda believe in conspiracies, b/c there is just too much money wrapped up in these illness to end them, but hopefully someone will do the moral thing someday.
jezebel892
allow me to tell you that dementia is not an issue just for elderly people. My mother is in her early sixties and in perfect health physically but today we were informed that she has vascular dementia (hence I am watching videos like this right now). The symptoms were there but they were for several months and even years but they were so mild that we couldn't even detect them considering that she has always been a bit more sensitive than usual. You can imagine the shock we are under but at the same time the strength we need to show to help this individual and the person that is behind the disease. A few weeks back this woman was the best cook I had ever known in my life. Today she was asking my dad how to cook some spaghetti. So yes, when you see a life distorted so rapidly you ask : how come there is no cure yet?
Dead Rat That's my point exactly, I mean, I'm not talking about finding a cure for aging, I want to keep aging, b/c that means I'm still alive, EVERYTHING will continue to age as long as time keeps on.
I'm talking about a cure for dementia and alzeimers. I don't see why dementia has to be synonimous with aging. Dementia and alzeimers are NOT normal parts of aging.
According to doctors they don't even know what the hell causes dementia nor what it even IS. They also claim not to know what causes Sundown Syndrome.
So no I'm not talking about stopping aging, b/c the only way to stop aging is to die. I'm taking about HOW you age, that is an entirly different thing.
In 2014 there is NO excuse whatsoever for aging not to be made easier.
I think there ARE cures for these things, they are just not releasing them, yeah call me a conspiracy theorist, but there is just too much money in this stuff.
*****
on this one mate I wouldn't call you a conspiracy theorist. it is simple maths. why sell one cure when you can sell billions of pills. I do not know for sure but I so much agree with you that in 2014 they still cannot make aging easier. Dementia has so many ramifications that affect not only the diseased person but the rest of the family so much. It is so hard to see the people you love not being themselves anymore. They are "dead" already but they have to "live" like empty shells and we have to experience the two ways suffering.
Your voice is too soft!
Thank you for your video
Thanks!