I Hate Animation
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- Опубликовано: 27 сен 2024
- My soul is ripped apart by my indecisive mind. Every little heartstring is cut so uncaringly. For years, I’ve loved the idea of animation. Making visually appealing characters, stories, sharing them, and being known as an artist was my dream for years. More than anything, I wished that I could create the worlds I lived within my mind. I wanted to share the stories that I had created and felt so deeply for in my heart. I saw no other way life could be, I was going to be an animator, and I was going to make the ideas I had come true. There was no other route, nothing else for me to long for or dream of, this was it for me.
Somewhere along that path my mind changed. It was a small change, just the smallest statement, that nearly destroyed me. It was when i finally realized, “oh, I have to be good at this”. After that, it’s been a slow decent for me. It’s not that my skills are poor, rather I think I’m quite skilled at art, but I don’t know if I want to base my value as a person on a career that has such an unreliable return. I suppose every career has a skill level you must reach, after all, you have to be able to provide something. Animation and art as a career however, is extremely discouraging. Along with the low chance of financial stability, your art being seen as “good” or “quality” is extremely subjective. Even if people perceive your art as good- if your style doesn’t fit the project, or you don’t have the right connections, you’re done for. In an industry where most are treated poorly, like drawing machines, worth no more than a line on a screen, why would I, feeling my artistic worth near nothing, subject myself to an industry that will only berate me and crush my soul? Why is it that I must be good enough? Why is it that I am not granted the ability to survive simply because I am alive? Why is my art not enough just because I poured my soul into it?
Maybe it’s because I’m lazy. I suppose I don’t want to be better because I just don’t feel I can be. I will never be as motivated as my peers, as creative, as talented, as acceptable as them. I am burnt out. I am tired. My hand is disfiguring. Nobody cares about what I make- my creations are a peek and a scroll. People may look at my art- tell me it looks nice- is that it? Is that all my work is to you? Something to look at? Something to awe at then forget? Within the visual layers on the page there’s meaning to me. Every kept paper- every excitedly drawn line, I want people to understand the effort I put in. In my heart it feels near none, as if my attempts will always be in vain, for I will always just be another “artist” and nothing else. I could never reach the levels of notoriety that my peers can- people just don’t care about who I am. They don’t see what I am beyond what I make. They don’t. They don’t, and there’s nothing I can do about that. I can’t beg for attention, I can’t scream at myself to get better, I can’t complain forever, I can’t hate myself for never getting better, I can’t hate myself for never changing. For never being what everyone else wants to be, for not forcing myself into an industry-sized box in an attempt to just have a little bit of a chance.
I can’t continue to grovel for people who won’t listen to me. It’s unfair to place the burden of caring on people who didn’t ask for it. It’s unfair of me to feel the dread I do towards my peer’s success yet ask them to enjoy mine. I do not hate my peers, I do not hate myself, I do wish to get better, I just wish my mind would not tear me apart. I am a good artist, I am not worth nothing, if my art is not beautiful on the page then it is beautiful by word. I try, and there are people, few people, but there are people who see it. The people closest to me recognize my worth aside my art, and that means the world to me. I am worth far more as a person than the art I make. Regardless of how my mind might try to coerce me into hatred, into despair, into jealousy, into depression, no matter how in the depths I may feel, I will always be proud of my peers. Proud of their creations and themselves as people. I may not feel I have any worth in comparison to them, but I will always marvel in the work they can produce. I cannot ignore nor push aside the heavy amount of heart and love placed in what they create- I hope one day I can see it in myself too.
I shouldn’t compare myself as heavily as I do. In some ways I just can’t help myself, but that’s only how I am right now. I say I hate animation, truly I just find myself frustrated at myself as a whole. I don’t see it as “giving up on a dream”, rather a realization I am not bound to it. I love animation, I love creativity, I love everything about art. The people, the work, the meaning, I can’t get enough. I want to be part of it, even if just a little, so I will. I’ll be myself. That’s good enough. Whenever my heart tries to weep, and tell itself I am nothing but a failure, I ask,
“Are you sure?”
Blank 2 Nowhere - Graham Kartna
![The hate monologue | I have no mouth and I must scream animation [Original animatic by @eggonalegg ]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/dSogOUcE_U4/mqdefault.jpg)
Do i hate animating, or do i hate how society will treat me as an artist?
Real asf question
Are you the dreamer or merely part of someone elses dream?
These are the real questions the person who made this should be asking
im not even an animator (i just draw) but this rlly resonated with me, especially the "what is an artist" part. im not as good at expressing myself as you are so i always struggled to explain how i feel to my loved ones when i feel like i "hate" art, but i think this video sums it up perfectly. so that may sound weird but thank you for making this
I think I know what you mean. I personally love art and pictures always helped me make sense of the world, even from a young age I’ve always love it. But the problem for me personally is that no matter what I can’t stop comparing myself to others, and the thing is that I know I have potential for making the art I want to, but I just can’t. Everytime I feel like I’m doing well it just goes wrong somewhere. I’ll hate it or it’ll just look off and I just rip another page out of my sketchbook. And I hate it, and I hate myself for it. But I can’t wrap my head around the question of Do I hate making art, or do I hate the process of making the art I want?
I love art but I hate it.
And that’s why it’s beautiful.
@@TheWeirdoWaffl3 i think comparing yourself to others is fine within a certain limit! you can't grow if you only look at what you're doing, but you cant grow either if you're constantly beating yourself up for not being as good as someone else. i don't know how old you are or how long youve been drawing but i personally experienced that "phase" when i was around ~15, i think ive come to terms with it now. dissatisfaction is inherently part of being an artist (you'd never improve if you always felt like your art is amazing). i guess what i "hate" about art now is just the feeling of never improving. i mean, the more you improve the more you realise how much you don't know. it's daunting
“Why are they better than me” hit me so hard as a fellow artist/animator 00:59
dont look at anyone elses art then think about your own if it isnt to inspire
I think you should find something special within your own art, even though it may be ugly or stupid to look at
i hate to compare my skill and i do it all the tine…
Reality is often simple. They probably put a lot more work and time into their drawings than you. For example, I recently saw one girl that I really liked her art and she was showing sketchbook after sketchbook for about 1 hour of all the drawings she made in her career, and that made me realize that they don't get good because they're just talented... It's a mix of being hard-working, consistent, studying smart, and loving what you're doing. If an artist follows those simple steps they will become professionals in just 3 years (even if they have never drawn before). But the hardest step is being CONSISTENT and that may sound simple, but most artist are NOT CONSISTENT. I have seen a lot of artists in the 5 years I been drawing and the BEST of the BEST are the crazy mother fuckers that spend all the day drawing, studying and being consistent even when they don't feel like drawing or when they hate what they're making. THOSE GUYS are not TALENTED, they're amazing artists who put their sweat and blood into their drawings.
I feel like this experience resonate with a LOT of creatives in the world. It’s a love/hate relationship between the process of making art because there’s so much time that passes from start to finish. We tend to impulsively pick up a project, treat it as though it will be our magnum opus someday, but then inexplicably drop it completely in frustration…perhaps reluctantly restarting the same abandoned idea years later at times. I feel like it’s a complex mixture of a lot of factors because the art you want to make tends to grow, shift, change as the creator changes. Sometimes a concept you once loved feels outdated and tied to a past version of yourself which is no longer relevant. And that’s frustrating. It’s part of the process but is no doubt laborious and can feel like running in circles sometimes. Plus the external pressure to prove yourself worthy of potential to others can get overwhelming. Longing to someday have a finished project that looks good and will be worthy of praise, but not having the dedication or motivation required to make it a reality. Or perhaps perfectionism and self critique gets in the way. Point being I understand where you’re coming from, as I’m an aspiring animator and have a plethora of scrapped animatics. I find the social aspect of this interesting as well, because it’s absolutely true. When dedicating all time & attention to art we tend to overlook relationships with friends and family or neglect personal needs in favor of productivity. And there’s that nagging feeling that no amount of progress is enough, that even with the hours crammed isolated in a room you’re wasting life away. I get it. Hell I used to listen to “Come Hang Out” by AJR whenever I was animating because it continually reminded me of the internal battle between pursuing content creation or getting out of the house.
I don’t really know where I’m going with this long ass writing, sorry. But this video came into my recommended and it’s very thought provoking. I personally resonated with the texts showed and the premise of burnout from animating for so damn long with no feasible end in sight. Your video made me think deeply and reflect, which I think goes to show you’ve created something special here. Although it may not seem like a lot from your perspective, it means a great deal to find another artist going through the same motions. So thank you for sharing such an introspective video with us, I wish you well with finding a good healthy balance between work and maintaining connections. Don’t give up on pursuing your dreams…even if not as a career I’m sure it will still serve as a good outlet for self expression. Please take care, take needed breaks, and please know that you aren’t solely defined by what you accomplish. We’re all a work in progress
Then, stop. Genuinely. See where that gets you. Perhaps you might realise that you’re truly not happy here and find other interests to cultivate (and you can healthily pursue animation or return to it in the future), or you might find that all you needed was a break-so that you can rekindle your passion for this artform.
Exactly its not for everyone and just anyone it is passion driven artist ambition it is all the effort you believe it will be.
It's never that simple
@@ShMowzer-u1w in head maybe but its the healthiest advice dont brush it off
@@ShMowzer-u1w yes it is, sometimes we forget that
@@ShMowzer-u1wYes it is. I wanted to be a mechanic, realized I was terrible after a year, and decided to switch to sound design. Best change I ever made.
This resonates with me so much, especially “I’d rather be an artist instead of an industry worker.”
I always wanted art to be my job, but now I cannot fathom the work that is put into it. It nearly made me drop out of school entirely. Now I have no idea what to do.
Agh thank you so much for this. i’m entering art school this year and i feel like there’s no scarier time to be in or enter the industry. I used to listen to the gravity falls dvd commentaries over and over again and romanticize hearing about alex hirsch overworking and falling asleep at his desk writing an episode, or obsessing over the complex pipeline that goes into making animation. The pixar storyboard and previz scene rendering were like magical little gems to me. I think I love the *idea* of animation. I wanna be a plucky storyboard artist in burbank in 2006, or better yet an internet indie animation darling managing a team and jumping in to key frame specific scenes because i’m too precious about the quality of the work. But even without AI i find animation terrifying. so much of its reputation revels in how sickly it is. Tons of animators in the US are wildly mistreated, and it’s likely worse for those performing outsourced work in other countries. Sometimes i sit down at the tablet and enter a flow state, falling in love with the medium for the millionth time. but most of the time it’s like pulling teeth. i hate animation. it’s bad. it’s everything to me and it’s like the coolest thing ever but also i hate it.
Differentiating between an art form and its equivalent industry model is important: that one is malleable by the artist and their time, energy, attention, and experience; and the other exists as the marketplace allows it to. Both things can change.
I graduated art school last year with a BFA in illustration and I have had a rough, but rewarding time in redefining what artmaking means to me outside of pursuing it as a job. People of all social classes through all of time have made art.
I hope this helps a little, and I’m sorry if Ive rambled off-topic
rlly good video
I lost my passion for 2D animation quite quickly, I can't bear to spend so long drawing all of those frames, especially since I reach burn out so quickly. It became too much of a chore to materialise my ideas into something tangible before I lost interest.
What helped for me was to switch to 3D and it actually feels fulfilling and fun, like how 2D animation used to feel. I think what helps is that I don't have to constantly redraw characters, just move them around every few frames.
But it's different for everyone, one of my friends who used to animate just makes still drawings now. I hope you find what you're looking for
Oh man. I'm kinda feel the same way. No wonder why your video appeared in my recs
This feels like your thoughts when you're laying down in bed in the dark and you're at your lowest point
I have no words for how incredibly close to home this hits. I don't mean to write a book over here, but I have been sitting in this exact feeling, these exact thoughts and doubts and bitter outlooks, since my first year of college. I graduated last year. Still have no idea where I'm going, what I want, who I am without the "artist" identity attached. It's scary. I'm tired. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm trying to not stew in the shame I feel for working a non-creative job, but it's hard because of expectations and my own lack of fulfillment. More and more, though, I fear working in the art field will be the final nail in the coffin for my turbulent feelings toward art.
But then I see beautiful works! And things I wish I could have worked on with the other artists that produced it! And I want connection and to express and to share! And it hurts, to both love and resent this thing that once was purely for the mere act of creating it and nothing more. And now I don't know who I am in relation to it, yet I'm more lost imagining a "me" without it. It feels like a failure, a betrayal, a piece of myself being abandoned unceremoniously. Like it was all a big waste of time. (What's that concept called, where you invest a ton of time into something and don't let it go purely because of the amount of time invested, even if it no longer serves you/works? It's that lol)
I stumbled across this video as I was going to turn on music to sit down and try to draw, ironically. I have multiple animations started, none finished, and everyday it eats at me. Why can't I just SIT DOWN and DO IT. It's like pulling teeth, and yet, simultaneously, the urge to still draw exists. I have a plethora of other hobbies, overwhelming in its own right, because every single time I try to do those other things, my brain is yelling at me, "If you have time to do this, you have time to work on your projects!" And it's just a perfect figure-eight of guilt, guilt, guilt. Always. Even when I'm out doing other things, with friends, family.
I know this is unhealthy. But it's an incredibly tangled, complex relationship, and I've been trying to untangle it for nearly 7 years, when I was told I had to figure out what I was going to do for the rest of my life and pick a college major, and I thought, "I love art, I can't imagine doing anything else!"
How twisted that truth has become.
Sorry for whatever this was, I just really appreciated this video and everyone sharing their feelings around it too. It's comforting to have this solidarity, being someone who has no one to talk about this with and is constantly being hounded by family to finally "get a job in my field, you went to college for this, you can't waste that degree, just keep applying" and so on.
Welp, time to go draw lol
Edit: Just read the description, and I am once again completely, wholly in agreement---that is exactly how I feel. I'm exhausted by my mind and whatever this creative limbo is.
I’d like to put this out here for anyone watching-
The animation industry is very intensive and fast paced. It’s easy to get burned out and compare yourself to others. Just know that despite how hard it all is, you usually aren’t working alone- and if animation isn’t your strong suit there are still plenty of jobs within the animation industry that you can get into (ex. Background artist, character artist, storyboarding, etc). A lot of the animators that I’ve met from the industry have told me the same thing: art is great, but don’t let working get in the way of life. Prioritize your health and happiness. If art is something you’re genuinely passionate about, don’t give up on it
Man, some of this reminds me of how I am in regards to music production. For me, it was perpetually comparing my work to people who had infinitely more experience than me. It's like constantly hitting my head against a brick wall, trying to force your creations to be as 'good' as theirs. I think one of the realizations that liberated me was that music wasn't something I 'did for a living', it was something I 'lived to do'. Thus, I was free from expectations that I could not possibly meet due to my lack of experience. I think it's great that you want to expand into other fields, as that is (I think) a good way to avoid burnout. Don't want to invest in a craft for a while? You can invest in another one.
I also understand what you mean when people just call your creations 'nice', rather than offering any deeper insight that recognizes your toil. However, if those people are laymen to your craft, can they be blamed? Can you expect them to understand the methodology behind every line, every tween frame, every line trace? I don't know if you have this in your social circle, but having at least one person who is sufficient at understanding your work present to offer a more detailed insight and commentary on your creations helps a lot. Not only can they appreciate in greater depths the hard work you put in, but they can offer genuinely constructive pointers rather than just, 'it's nice'.
Sorry if I went a bit too much 'problem solver' in trying to address what your going through. If none of my suggestions are what you're looking for right now, then at least know I understand where you're coming from.
Don't stop animating, but don't destroy yourself over it either.
animation is not the only way to be an artist; it’s one i aspire to do but ultimately one i do not feel happy doing, and i have to deal w that
wow, I don’t really know what to say, but, just don’t give up okay? Even if you decide art as a career isn’t for you, you can always do it as a hobby. we need more artists than ever and you are putting good things into the world!
To me it seems like the idea of value is destroying you. A mountain of pressure to be a good artist and live up to all that prestige you associate with that title. I think anyone would be crushed by such a heavy burden.
That's why I've given up on carrying such an insanely heavy load. Ambition? I don't need any of it. I've dropped the weight of trying to compete with the entire world. All ~8billion of them. I don't need to better than everyone let alone myself.
Relax. Existing is enough. The birds fly and chirp everyday. Whether they have any value or not they still exist nevertheless. Tying your value to your creations like you're worth everything or nothing seems so exhausting. If value is decided that way I'd still live how I want nevertheless. If it isn't then it's still the same to me.
I don't care if value exists or not because to me it's all the same regardless: I'll still exist however I want. If the birds can so can I.
when you make a geniunely amazing animation about hating animation. passion and purpose are what drives the artist.
I started to really animate because i enjoyed doing it, giving up on that is giving up because i genuinely enjoy doing it. I hope you can enjoy whatever you do, programming is fun too, and just art by it's self, maybe try story boarding or concept art, just dont do something you actively hate. Animation was not my first love and it hurts to let go of one, I know but if you don't you'll screw your life up, draw, make a game, make a song, a board game whatever just don't animate. And if you still don't have the will to stop maybe try 3d animations they are different.
I hope you find the life you're looking for and that you deserve.
Also, I love your video "In the Midst of the Killer," but comments were turned off so I couldn't say that there.
Thank you for this. Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable here. I think I just came to a realization too. I’m gonna try animation but, if it’s not for me it’s okay. I’m not bound to it like you said. Thank you. This made me feel a little better about my opportunities and pathways I could take as an artist. Thank you. Much love. Brilliant video. ❤
This is truly one of the greatest video I've ever seen. The editing, the sound design, the feels, the rhythm, so much... And the description.
All of it vibrated a chord in my soul I hadn't heard before. Thank you, and have a great life
I am going to college for animation too, and wow. This brought up a real feeling inside of me that I couldn’t pin down for a long time. Thank you.
For me it helps for me to keep my head down and just make stuff every week. I push something anything out. It doesn't have to be good and no one needs to like it. It really does help if people like it but at the end you just gotta make things for yourself. I hope I can stick to this I've done it for a few months now. I relate a lot to your feelings on the industry I think it's really bullshit how they treat people like us. I'm maybe ignorantly trying to be indie making my super niche weirdo cartoons but I feel if I like it maybe enough people can find it in themselves to like it as well. Anyways good luck Lisa much love from another animator. Sincerely.
I’m not even a artist but the “I’d rather be an artist than an industry workers” hit me.
I’m majoring in animation, but for some reason, I’m wanting to change it to film. Not that I want to give up animation-I just think it’d be better for me if I learn the ways to break into the industry in the first place. Especially with the way that it all is now, and I somehow enjoyed my first film class more than my animation one, I’m in limbo right now. I just hope that I can make it. I think we’re all experiencing this feeling right now. You’re definitely not alone in this.
Woof
This kinda reminds me of a conversation my coworker and i had recently, where he kept encouraging me to get more games in my portfolio and maybe i'd get a good job--and i interrupted him, basically saying "no dude, you're looking at it backwards. I want a livable wage that i use to supplement a game-making habit, not to depend on games to survive. That would take all the fun out of it"
I felt a similar way, i was studying animation but i left the school. I dont actually want to give it up, its just that school was very demanding, i wasnt quiet on the skill level yet, and while i knew that animating is very hard and tedious i didnt truly realised it for a long time. I keep practicing, and one day i might get good enough.
I make art to create something so no matter how much I hate it, no matter how much my art looks off, or like I’m no trying, or stiff, I’ll still make it because, one day I decided that it was a part of me I can’t throw away.
I’m not the same person that I was back then, for better and for worse, but my love for art hasn’t changed, I don’t think it ever will, and so I keep hacking away at drawing, because I love it. That will never change.
(Awsome animation btw! Sorry for dumping this in your comments lol, keep on keeping on!)
I dont want to forget this video. Everything about it spoke to me, especially this part: "People may look at my art- tell me it looks nice- is that it? Is that all my work is to you? Something to look at? Something to awe at then forget? Within the visual layers on the page there’s meaning to me. Every kept paper- every excitedly drawn line, I want people to understand the effort I put in."
Im scared to commit to my own art and work. To be like millions of others who do the same thing. No matter what choice I pick, I feel like Im no different from anyone else.
Genuinely this made me tear up, I feel like this video reasonates with a lot of us artists and animators
I feel you. Thanks for speaking up about your struggle
I love animation to bits, too. I'm hoping to be really good at it someday, somehow. I think what you love dearly is animation by itself, the process of creating, putting in the effort, putting in the time. What you despise is simply the competition, the competitive industry and the online space where all artists are fighting for some sort of attention or praise. Obsessing over whether you'll "make it" or whether you'll stand out will drive you insane. The best thing you can do is enjoy the process. Try to be better than you were yesterday. If someone likes your work when they find it? That's great. If your work is good enough to give you a career? That's also great. But ultimately whether you're seen by this chaotic algorithm or found by a recruiter looking to hire you for a job is by chance. In this game the only thing you can control is whether you animate or not. Whether you try to improve or not. The only thing being more skilled will do is potentially increase your chances of being seen or getting a job, but that's only a chance. I have seen amazingly skilled animators in every corner of the internet go unnoticed or without a job and its just how it is.
Stop animating to prove yourself to somebody, stop animating for the sake of other people. Stop animating for the sake of the competition. Just animate for yourself. Animate for the fun of it. I think that is how you can appreciate animation again.
i really did stop drawing for the same reason, its not sad or anything atleast not anymore, i just felt like my life has become better when i stopped drawing digitally and taking it too siriously and started doing more active hobbies like going to the gym, seeing progress in a way that isnt dependant on society is immaculate (most complicated word i used in my life)
You’re still very young /gen- Kind of was in a similar position as you, wanted to test out the path of doing post-secondary for animation, but it didn’t line up- I was in the process of attempting to apply into schools, but I stopped mainly from the lack of stability of the industry- (to me personally. Whether it was seeing how many professionals had projects cancelled or were laid off, as well as seeing how frequently it’s common to have to continuously apply to new projects once you finish on one-)
And amongst other things- other experiences, and then becoming overwhelmed by similarly to you- comparing myself to others, having imposter syndrome, really killed the love I originally had for it. I always had imposter syndrome, and always compared myself to others, but this time around with everything piling up on each other became a huge blow.
Right now, I think the best you can do, is things like: being kind and be proud of yourself. Your effort and grit to commit and be brave enough to try your hardest to achieve something you are passionate about is something to be really proud of regardless of whether it leads. Genuinely feel proud of yourself for all of that energy and time you put in, because it’s not something everyone is brave enough or can commit themselves to. I for sure would applaud and cheer you on for doing so. :)
Additionally will mention: I am sorry to hear your experience with animation in a way feels tainted and ruined. Like I said before, I think I understand the feeling, and you’re not wrong at all and alone in feeling these things with it. And again, I feel similar, where I’m currently in a time where I’m trying to rebuild my relationship with it, and find that fun again.
If it’s something you still want to keep dabbling in, keep in mind you can always still do it for fun or for a hobby and not go in the traditional sense professional with it- You can try doing freelance/commission work to get some income. You can build an audience or community around your work, like you gathered all of us here to this video through social media accounts! Apply into some zines or collabs for fun with other artists, or hell, even make fanart, or even oc art for your own little stories-. There’s endless ways of being an artist or animator you don’t need to become in a traditional sense an industry animator, and even then, some animators don’t even go into pos secondary, just hone their craft, or even just do it for fun, and still get into the industry!
There’s no right or wrong with art, if it is something you want to pursue as a job, or just something you want to do for fun, technically no set path or education you need to go down to be one!
That snippet you shared about wanting to use that time to spend hanging out with friends and doing other things- Honestly, if animation/art is something you want to still keep up, I support the idea of taking a break, or spending less time drawing and doing other things you enjoy for a period of time! Similarly, I realized how burnout I was after drawing at least 1 hour daily for a few years, spending for the first time at least 1 week from the “grind” mentality relieved the pressure I put on myself that kept stunting my fun and motivation to learn and improve anyways!
Lastly too, ensure when you are drawing that you are having fun! If you!re drawing and it no longer feels fun anymore, definitely just do something else for the meanwhile. I’ve been having a lot more of a relaxed and fun experience really on drawing things that I like and when I actually feel like I’m enjoying, having fun, or learning. Drawing more and more when I don’t get something or get frustrated with myself just compounds into days of negative feelings about my work.
And OVERALL LASTLY HAHA (I swear :)) if you realize that animation maybe just isn’t your thing, that’s entirely okay too! Again, I applaud you and support you in seeing how hard you tried, it’s something few ppl are brave enough to actually commit to. there’s nothing wrong ever in wanting to pivot to something else for any reason. And hell, it’S not like you can never come back to it again, may industry pros, or even those learning in post-secondaries are on the older side too! And again, so many routes to becoming an animator than traditionally going to school-
No matter what you do, go out there, have fun, and raise some hell :) ❤️
this is so true, like I’m literally scared of my future of wanting to become an artist/animator :(
I don't like to call myself an artist, I feel egotistical and _Hee Hee hoo hoo I'm so cool and good at everything, I'm an artists!_ when I say that. Recently I heard in a podcast someone call themselves a _"Magician of the Imagination"_ and it's what I would say if someone asked what I want to be.
I'm an artist. I just watched a Ghibli movie, "Whisper of the Heart", and I think it's worth watching for anyone here who's an artistic people.
Animating makes me wish I was rich enough for rigging software
Bro this is literally me rn, but i cant give up cause i made a promise to myself and i intend to keep it
crazy how I've been asking myself these questions and feeling very similiarly to what you described, the dread of getting to the drawing tablet kills me every time, in a time where the industry seems like could fall apart at any moment, to only be replaced by ai...and then, while you try to improve, many others are just way better than you and the feeling of inadequance just doesn't end-
I hope you find a suitable answer to try and live your life at the best of its capabilities, it sucks to think about what comes next, so try one step at a time.
love ya fellow artist❤
As an aspiring animator, I really understand this. Animation can be fun but there’s no denying it’s hard as hell. It can be mentally exhausting and overwhelming.
I can tell you’re a very creative person through this video alone, and you’re passionate about art. The thing is that everyone has various mediums that they enjoy using. Sometimes a medium isn’t the right choice for someone. If this is the case, I feel like you can take your creativity in art mediums other than animation.
But if you’re still passionate about animation, my advice is to take a break, art can be mentally exhausting sometimes and as passionate as we are, mental health is a top priority.
And I know CalArts is a #1 ranked school but it’s very expensive like other private art schools. If you want to go to college for animation without being in crippling student debt, my advice is to go to a public college with a highly or at least decently ranked animation program that’s accredited by NASAD, I know that’s what I’m doing. I’m entering this semester and I’m scared as much as I’m excited but I know I can express myself, regardless if I go with animation or not.
I read the description and you venting about how good your art is and how little people look at it and boy did it hit close to home. I’ve felt like my art didn’t get much traction and felt like it sucked. But the thing is that most of the time, people say it doesn’t suck. Is it perfect? No, but name something that is. Whenever I vented about this, people say it didn’t suck. And as I said before, I can tell you’re creative just from this video. In my opinion, you’re not bad at all.
I don’t know if any of these are the right words but if you’re still passionate about animation, take a break and instead of blaming yourself and others, try looking at your art and see if you can improve on something along with being proud that you worked on something you’re passionate about. If you aren’t, you can focus on other art mediums that will suit you better.
This video really hit close to home and again, I don’t know if these are the right words but this is me trying my best. Regardless of whenever you choose to continue pursing animation or go into another art medium, I wish you good luck! Cause I know you’re talented.
I went to university on design and animation, which turned out to be a complete scam and a time waste. Simply, we didn't get any promised classes to teach us how to animate. But still, we had to figure it out and make cartoons with our schedule, being 90% filled up with unnecessary classes. Then, when we finally got to present our cartoons, we were judged based on the personal taste of whoever was the jury at that time. All that made me believe i am a failure, when in reality, i was put in the scenario where i couldn't succeed. I got severe anxiety disorder, i got burnout, that, at some point, felt like a full-on depression. After uni i literally couldn't draw for 3 years. I felt disgusted whenever i took a pencil and tried drawing characters. When in reality my mind was preventing me from doing something that hurt me in the past, again. And that artblock turned out the best thing that happened to me! All these 3 yeas, i blamed myself - "How's that, if i want to draw, why can't I force myself to? I am probably just lazy". No, I needed rest. I needed time off. And its completely okay. You can take rest from animation for a few years and come back to it later in life. It won't make you less of an artist, less of a creator. That 3 years let me heal, let me finally learn to respect and love my own art, to see its flaws and cons, and to realize what i have been doing wrong in my art journey.
Take time off. Heal yourself. You have a whole life ahead, you can turn back any time you want, and in any way you won't. Your art journey is only yours, dont let other opinions define it for you.
As a former animator, I feel you deeply. I was once an animator who made animated videos of my original characters like these cartoon shows.
I didn't go to animation, and now I know it was a good choice. I don't hate animating, I hate how people take my animations for granted. Won't spend a second to take a look at it, or just give it a like and move on. I had 2 animation channels which all failed. Now I made a new channel for posting videos I want.
I have a big ole pilot that I wrote and storyboarded and ready to go, but I can't bring myself to work on it. I hate the animation process and I hate the work that goes into drawing good drawings. I've started working on my webcomic again which has brought back some passion, which is ironic since comics are the same skills as animation in a way.
“You say ‘Script writing sucks, filming sucks, editing sucks, making a thumbnail sucks, posting the video sucks.’ Maybe you just don’t like making videos. Do something else with your life.”
-Jschlatt
wow, incredible ^^
you might not be able to take your time and stop, but if you can, do it.
and embrace change, try music, 3d animation or writing, being an artist is creating, not destroying yourself in the process, yet many have done it.
if you have to be an animator, try joining a real life community of one, might be hard these days cuz of the digitalisation age, but it's worth it.
anyways, whatever you do, i hope you'll find a way that does not mean suffering, good luck
Nice video! Videos are also animation, they can create images or what I call FPS. Reality can be also animation and what I think about experience is you, for to create a video what we call past present and future, its very complicated experiencing things you hate and you dont. Thats what I call Equal (Opposites)
You’re doing good.
Making art, of any kind, requires the enjoyment of the process itself first and foremost; in short: You make art because you like to *make* art. Not because of the people that may or may not see what you make. I'm going to translate one of my favorite quotes from my favorite writer of all time, Julio Cortazar, who is regarded as one of the single most influential latin american authors, I'd argue ever: (What he says, he says about authors, but it can, of course, be extrapolated to any kind of creative and/or artistic endeavor, such as animation)
"When you're writing, if you create expecting that, already, there will always be someone there to experience your art other than yourself, then you are lost as an author. When you write, you're on the other side of a river throwing pieces of paper across it. Yes, maybe there will one day be someone that picks the paper up and enjoys it, but that's just luck. So if you're not a fan of yourself and of the process of writing, then you've lost yourself at the beginning."
Still, there is no shame in being connected with yourself and what you really want to get out of any part of your life. And if, for that, you need to stop animating, then to be it.
i fw this video heavily investing at 285 likes
(hope ur ok man, and hope you find something that fulfills and makes u happy)
I felt this way before. I wanted to be a 3D character artist, it took me a year of no progress and almost no motivation to realize I wasn’t even enjoying it now. Just try a different form of art, from the looks of it you have time to course correct and adapt all that you learned
I don't think I'll ever know if I truly love art or not until I'm on antidepressants or something
Hey man, aspirational artist (so take my words with a grain of salt) here who's currently self learning (cant afford art uni) I dont know much about you or your struggles so I cant say much, but what I can say is that the most important aspect to art (of any kind) is to first learn to love it. That's just the kind of work it is.
Art expresses our creativity and by extension the art we create can be seen as a part of us. If you dont love yourself, you wont love your art and it'll show in your work. Take a break, take a breather and try to imagine why you went down this road in the first place. I say this because often in the pursuit of fulfilling others expectations of us, we forget to fulfill ourselves, we forget and lose sight of what made us love art in the first place.
And if you cant find yourself loving art? Then quit. It's okay, we are only humans, and we dont always know what to do with our lives. It might feel like you have wasted time but trust me you haven't, what you learned, the expirences you gained through this journey will help you through out your life, even if not directly. Pursue a profession which truly invigorates your heart, otherwise what's the point in working so hard? Art can still be a fun hobby if you choose to go to another path.
I know its not much coming from a stranger but I want you to know that your work, effort, and patience is appreciate. You have it in you to make it out of it. And whatever bad times you're going through right now will come to pass, it might seem like an eternity right now but a couple of years later you'll looking back at these times as if they were just a glimpse in you're life.
Best of Luck and Best of Wishes with whatever path you choose.
This one hit me personally
Understandable. Very understandable. I've thought about making animatics for fun since I'm ok at stills, but animation.. Respect for trying your best, though!
Just do it whenever you want, if you never want to it's not a big deal
Unlucky, for the industry or the world or even my mind will not stop me. I will listen to my heart, even if I die a homeless man.
Honestly seeing how all his videos barely reach 100 views and this video reaching almost 6000 by now makes me wonder if people will only listen at your lowest or do people secretly enjoy seeing it.
im only here because the algorithm recommended it. maybe its the algorithm that's learned thats what people click on
i got this in my recommended then subscribed and watched through their other work. very glad this video was recommended to me because otherwise i wouldn't've found this animator
You never thought of it being recommended? Because that's what it did.
For a while my most popular video ever was a video about me talking about Kim K’s hands
This video speaks to my soul. Thank you
Animation is my everything.
I don't want you to become a mirror to me.
I've had thoughts like this for so long, this Is accurate to how It feels
Hey, I gave up on being an artist because it was never more than a hobby to me so maybe im not the best person to ask but i genuinely think you shouldn't go into the industry if thats not what u want. Some of the best artists were shunned for their art because it "failed to meet the stamdards" of what art should be like. Take this video for example, look how many ppl it resonated with! You have things to say, things to give to the world. Experiment with it. Try different art forms. Do whatever YOU want. I think thats the most honest way to be an artist. Its not practical at all thats true but thats okay. I would argue it makes it even more admirable. And if u decide you dont want to create anymore that is okay too, it's okay to just be. Life is hard but you have time to figure it out, i promise. Life is pretty long tbh
Scrolling through the comment section will not help.
hey thanks i should go do something productive
In this area and I am very excited 😁
I hope everything works out for you, don't give up
this is sad... hope u heal from this... person
LISA OOMFIE WHAT R U DOING ON MY ROKUS RUclips RECOMMENDED
Art and animation is hard, if you need to rest, rest. But if your passionate about art, take your time. Start over again, start off with 30 minutes animating or drawing. Some other advice is that this is what art is, it tears you apart a lot of the time. Although I haven't experienced it myself due to my perspective on everything I do understand the struggles that a lot of people have. Everything is simpler than it may seem, so keep this in mind: don't overdo yourself.
I see how you've been through, go ahead.
If this is genuinely how you feel...
All I can recommend is to develop a sense of positive nihilism. The world we currently live in is incredibly hostile to all but the most privileged people. Work, effort and care are disrespected and all of our appearance and success is at the whims of unfeeling algorithms...
Focus on other people, make art that you care about and that you can show to Real Human Beings Around You... As for survival... find something you can do that sustains you and leaves you enough time to still create for you.
All art is made for people, not profit. Some art is profitable, but art can not be made for profit (it is no longer art if that is the goal). Find art for you, and survive through any means necessary...
I didn’t know reading these comments gave me a fucking English degree
Wow.. music style seemed familiar to me and turns out it was from Graham Kartna. Yay ;D
I LOVE GRAHAM KARTNA
@@CoolGuy_LT hehe same :DD
That's okay
hi u don’t know me but i think if u want to give up animation for a while do it. rejection is tough and i am the worst person to deal with disappointment so i get that getting rejected will want to make u quit animation even more. it’s not the end of the world u can always go back to it later if i want to there is no point forcing urself to do something and pushing urself for something u can’t stand anymore i get it. quit if u genuinely hate animation
calarts is sleeping on you
fuck them and go be great on your own terms
ohh no! how could you hate animation! I'm so shocked!!
Woah. WOAH. WOAHHHHHHH. WOAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
either you actually hate it (in which case stop doing it) or you're really bummed out about the calarts thing, if it's the latter, become a world renowned animator to teach them a lesson
relateable....
Wait, this isn't Evangelion
I'm pretty new to art and wow, not to be insulting but this really discouraged me, and I'm going to be honest, I have the biggest feeling I haven't read half of the book, but I'll try. I don't think animating should be a job, it should be a hobby, there is 3d animation as well which makes more money, after all, most corporations like Disney, as you saw, tend to go with 3d, like tell me have you seen a 2d movie from Disney at all after the 2010's? Again I don't think I've understood this completely, you'll know when You see my vids, just know, I don't have pimple :/. I think you come back, because you don't know life without it, it's like someone who came out from jail or a war, they forgot the functions of society and have to try and deal with it, but the only way they know is there way, so the prisoner might return to being a criminal and the veteran, I dunno. Basically change is hard (if that wasnt obvious of me T_T). Honestly I'll still animate, it's all for funnsies and I share it with my friends and people with similair interests, kinda one of my ways of befriending. If I saw your description right, it wasn't economically stable, so I dont know how that feels. I animate because wanna make life, alternatives to life are machines, so maybe you can fine something similair, like an engineer for mechanics, or anything. Now... AI. Yea as an artist this sucks buns, and I dunno what to say, it sucks but it's awsome! But don't be discouraged yet, because if there's one thing wrong with it, it's annoying. Do this you say, it does that, ok do this, nuh uh, wdym Nuh uh!? Ima do it my own way. Now cmon, no artist is annoying like that, its just either no I won't do it, or ok. SEE YA (I highly doubt I signify anything to your mindset) -A flipan animator (might change my name to NADAW1N3R4KE[no worries its a nickname{shut up me}])
This is the saddest thing I watched and read.
You and david zazlav must be besties
Than why do you animate?
holy shkit
Then don't. No one is forcing you...
Go do what you think is best for you.
i'm sorry lisa but i just can't see you the way your friends can.
BLAHAJ
Go live your life, not everyone has to like art, and that's ok.
Comment test for getting past whatever the heck those filters are (I promise to not say something nasty there)
1. You should rally for UBI implementation and start making yourself a community for artists and enthusiasts who will care about all the little details you put into your work.
2. If you feel worthless and miserable, it's probably because you aren't in communities or relationships that fulfil your social psychological needs.
3. Don't bindingly associate yourself with people who don't deeply care about you. Find people who will. If you feel like nobody cares and there aren't any communities specifically for people who feel like that, start one so Ⅰ can ϳоⅰn it. (Please.)
4. If you feel compelled to continue in spite of your overwhelming desperation to make it all come to an end, let yourself suffer. It might sound insensitive, but it is your momentary decision and you can stop at any time. You can start and stop as much as you like. You can collapse, have a meltdown, wake up on the floor with dry tears and messy hair in 5 hours and 47 minutes, exasperate, rant to someone for 2 hours and 32 minutes, realise it's actually an option (just one that has apparent indignity waiting to be surpassed by your desperation) and beg for people to validate you, take a long break, twitch and roll around or just do the flop if you so wish. Nobody's going to stop you. You don't need to put pressure on yourself to keep it together. I think you will feel better if you collapse, even just for a bit. It can give you time to think about life.
5. At the end of the day, remember that all of the things you're doing are there to appease yourself, and if you don't have any specific significant purpose you are obligated to fulfil (like me), you are the most important thing to consider. If you don't like how things are going, change them. If you want to wallow, don't let anyone stop you. If, after all this, you still want to do what you've wanted to do but felt hurt by the prospect of doing for a long time, optimise the conditions so it will go as smoothly for you as it can...
Bro got rejected 🥶☠☠
k you dont have to animate
Maybe you should get into therapy. It seems like you need some help to sort this out. Best wishes for you 🩵
I know this is a vent video... but it's sooo poetic and beautiful how like your response to feeling like a failure of an artist is to make such a powerful piece of art
💯💯💯
thank you for putting the words out my head for me 🙂↕️
Vents are often the most powerful works an artist can make
i'm going into animation next year and this feeling is terrifying. looking at student work and feeling like you're lifetimes away from that level, seeing how art's value to the public is dropping more and more (especially because of AI), worrying about salary, worrying about potentially not being able to get a job, etc. comparing my art to the level that's expected to become successful feels like a claw in my chest, it digs at the back of my mind every second of every day, and all i can really do about it is practice. but even drawing makes me anxious because i don't know if i'm practicing correctly, or if i'm studying the right things, or if i'm going in the right direction.
thanks for this incredibly raw and vulnerable video -- at our age, the future is so uncertain that (especially as artists) it feels like we're facing two doors that lead to either happiness or a pit full of nails, and we have no idea which is which. all we can do is work hard, have a backup plan, and hope for the best. if you feel like your passion for art is fizzling out, it might be best to pursue a different career path so you can draw without the pressure of needing to rely on it socially and financially.
The only thing any of us can do is move forward, one step at a time. We'll make mistakes, fail when we might have succeeded, and lose out on opportunities.
And we will keep living. We will grow and change, taking what we learned and doing better. Accepting our failures and our blessings.
We walk forward. It's all we can do.
TLDR: there's alot of life to live, remember to keep perspective of that
the animation industry suffers with the loss of so many creative people who just couldnt continue on their path anymore due to so many unfortunate VALID reasons. its okay to lose interest, maybe try to find another thing you like to do, also its okay to come back to it eventually. you are human and we're just so complex honestly you shouldnt have to justify anything to anyone. you are so strong for being here and for managing to do what you did so far (every little thing, every little sketch), i personally could never. please never stop being you, even if its hard, im sure your next step will be so beautiful, at least for yourself.
The video ends with "are you sure?" Leaving the door unlocked or at least not burning the bridge. That feeling during venting where youre so sure of wanting to stop, but something in you asks if you're sure you want to.
Hey dude, IK this is extremely weird for me to comment, usually i don't comment alot and we're not rly friends, but i do want to say this. I understand how you feel in that video, rejection in general and feeling self doubt within your self. Also i want to do Animation myself one day but i don't a the equipment that you do besides the tablet. The Animation industry is harsh these days lots of layoffs and outsourcing from different countries which ik Dreamworks did, and Underpaid animators for example Across the Spiderverse. Honestly its your ultimate decision if you want to continue animation or not i sympathize with people who want to. I've seen a couple of your animation vids pop into my recommended fee and they're pretty good, i've never made a animation onpar to your level. Your a very creative person, i can see you being a prop designer or even a director/writer. Animation is hard, i have dreams on working in animation (Mines are a bit more ambitious and i'll admit it a bit unrealistic) but i think you can do great things besides just animation. At the end of the day its you're own choice if you want to peruse animation but whatever you do just make sure you're passionate about it, most people don't even attempt to make their careers come true and work to a 9 to 5 Job around at that age. you still have a LONG TIME to figure out what you want to do in life.
I think regardless of what you have, you can definitely make something you’re happy with! I remember using some free online software when I was younger. But still I’m grateful for your kind words, we’re both pretty young and the industry can still change so I hope for the both of us it is kinder.
Ofc man, the most I have is Procreate which does allow you to animate, I hope the industry does change its kinda on fire if I have to be brutally honest, my dream is to make a animation studio one day even tho that’s kinda unrealistic but hey dream the dream.
also EDIT: @CoolGuy_LT congrats on your first 1K video on your channel
I understand to the best of my ability. I may be misreading it, but if being an animator means giving up my way of art, I won't animate. *The industry* is becoming exactly what people predicted it would be. A *souless, corporate mess.* With big animation companies like *Pixar, one of the founding fathers of animation, basically saying "independent ideas don't make money", is heartbreaking.* Not to mention the general disrespect animators are getting. Hardwork being thrown out the trash, and to never be published because "the company owns it". Or maybe an animation being run over by the cash cows of RUclips. I may be rambling, but that's what I'm getting.
Besides that, this popped up on my recommendations out of the blue. I clicked on it, being a person who creates animations, intrigued by what you meant. *And I agree.* This is art, this is self expression. Its more than a movement of a character. But, me personally, if you're losing passion for something, let it go. Art is about creating something with a passion; to prove a point, or to tell a story. There are different art forms. Find one that you find passion in, and go with it. Don't feel you're glued to it either. I can practice animation, but sometimes i want to test out editing, or cosplaying. Anyways, whatever you do, true people who stick by your side will always be proud of you.