What a beautiful and insightful woman. I love how her face lit up with the most genuine smile when she explained how it was easier to communicate with Chris because he was asking her about something she loves.
The fact that she said "we can't be our disabled selves" was so powerful. I really hope the world changes and I really hope I can contribute to that change.
As an autistic adult, I'm so very glad you're discussing this! ND people should be given this tech instead of being coached incessantly to speak aloud. Not all ND people need it, but how many are considered low intelligence simply because they struggle with speech?
In school and at home, I struggled so much with getting my actual internal dialogue out that people always considered me not as intelligent, but I would always do amazing project work so they would ask if my parents did it for me. It is so hurtful to be considered unintelligent when you know that you do understand things but can't convey them in a traditionally accepted human communication format, so you remain silent and deep in thought instead. I wish I had a device to talk for me when I was that young age. At 42 now, I no longer have the need to communicate to prove myself as worthy. I just do my own thing, but the experience still left it's mark on me forever.
@@JAMQWERTHugs* Just have to say tho that I'm so ecstatic to hear that you have the genuine awareness of your truly voracious worth and importance no matter how you're able to communicate! I'm so very happy that you seem to adamantly and confidently believe the fact that despite how others may believe, decide, and judge your specific caliber of intellectual capacity to be low solely based upon how you communicate, that you've still kept such a well-deserving pride within yourself because of you confidently having cognizance that you truly indeed have a high level of intelligence no matter what any other person may assume of you! It's awesome that you realized that ultimately their opinions truly don't matter. And I sincerely love and admire that you wholeheartedly have chosen to proudly and boldly allow yourself to feel so free to just do your own thing, but then also all a while you're swiftly boldly disregarding that false narrative/ notion that the obligation to communicate up to a certain standard approved by our society is what determines or proves someone's worthiness and degree of intelligence because you're completely aware of that being so beyond extremly fictitious and desperately needs to change! Anyway, sorry for such a long reply, I just really felt moved to say all that to you. And wanted to tell you that I very much liked your whole comment and I think you seem like you're smart and very awesome! Sending hugs and hugs to you!
Every minute of this video gets a thumbs-up from me...TJ is so insightful on what it means to be autistic AND to be the parent of an autistic child AND to be an autistic person of color to an autistic boy/young man of color, phew! Many blessing to her and her family. And, Chris, thank you so much for not being afraid to ask and point out the very real struggle of being a person with a disability/disabled person of color. I have a 16 y.o. son on the autism spectrum with developmental delays and my chest tightens at the mere thought of him having to face the real world and the added layer of not being white-others may not see and understand my baby like I see and understand him. Education is key!
Do you think it would help to have a business card or something to give with lisence and registration that says you're autistic for those cop situations? It could become standard practice like the bracelets to identify certain medical conditions in emergencies.
LOVE the t-shirt! Hearing her talk about how she has taught her kids to "mask" for their own safety is just heartbreaking. Racism has got to stop! What an intelligent, insightful and inspiring woman! 👍💙
What she said is so powerful… . “Speech does not make people superior.” . She’s so calm and wise. Loved this video. She shared A LOT of gems and importance things society always ignores or disregards. . Difficulty does not symbolize inadequacy. Just listen to how articulate she is…we are all different and most of us require more patience. . Sometimes all it takes is patience and a willingness to learn/understand how to communicate with each individual..as each of us communicate differently.
I am a preschool teacher who was recently introduced to AAC for one of my autistic students. It's so awesome to hear about the experience of an adult who uses a device to communicate. I also appreciated that we were able to hear TJ's perspective as the mom of black autistic boys.
@@meganchristian7085 no, I mean my autistic student. "People first" language had been debunked as not helpful, accurate, or a desired label by autistic people. The title of this video is literally "An Interview with an Autistic Adult." Not "An Interview with an Adult with Autism."
Wow. This really opened my eyes. At 22 although I'm not diagnosed I've been suspecting for a while now. I need time to process and respond and people in my life never gave me that time. From that you learn to just be quiet. Since a child I would notice others speaking effortlessly where as I couldn't get words out. So people place labels, look down on you, and dismiss your intelligence. I've always loved to write. I can share all my thoughts precisely and clear online, but if I were to try and speak in person chances are it comes out jumbled or rushed or as TJ mentioned, not what I really meant. Thank you for sharing.
It can take me days or longer to process something, particularly in a confrontational situation. I still don't know quite what to do with that long of a processing time except maybe say, "I'm going to need some time to process this." I used to like to write, too, but I was forced to deal with a conflict by e-mail, and because I thoughtfully chose my words, I was accused of liking to "play with words." Since that trauma, it's sometimes hard for me to write even a short e-mail without spending hours editing it and still not being sure I am saying things right.
I agree with this. I definitely prefer text communication and I find myself sort of “freezing up” in situations where I’m talking in-person or with a group of people. I think a device like the one TJ has would really help me and a lot of autistic people (I am not diagnosed but definitely suspecting).
Hello there! I'm 16 years old and a junior in high school... we have a program at our school where kids with critical disabilities are welcomed into a classroom like kids in other schools or most children's day to day life. I spend 2 of my study halls and my lunch in that classroom, it allows me to feel safe or calm. I came from a very stressful class today and as soon as I saw the two specific people in that class, I felt calm. My legs stopped shaking, my fists were un-balled and I was sitting with a friend who's in a wheelchair and a smile on my face. My GAD (generalized Anxiety Disorder) was nothing at the moment. I've been watching this channel since I was around the age of 7 years old. I always wanted to go into a career field that works with children that have disabilities. I decided that this year I will be focusing on an Occupational Therapist for children with disabilities. This channel has helped me in so many ways. More than most will understand, so thank you SBSK from the bottom of my heart. -Mo (Thank you for all of your wonderful and kind words!)
That is a great field! I am a Speech Language Pathologist, and Occupational Therapists really are a great help for children with disabilities. I work in a job along with Occupational Therapists and they really do wonders for these children.
I’m so happy to see her spreading awareness for my sons community (nonspeaking) as well as her own (autistic POC) I applied to share my sons journey with nonspeaking Autism - and possibly a little about my own diagnoses, and I pray I get a chance to share his magic with the world!! He is truly the most incredible person. Autistic people are amazing. ❤
My brother is nonverbal and autistic as well :) he's 7 years younger than me so he's still growing up while I'm an adult. Its been so cool seeing him grow and seeing him figure out alternative ways of communicating with us. He likes typing things out on the notes app of his phone the most, plus he also has whiteboards in various sizes (a big one at home, a medium sized one at home and a small travel size one) and tons of colorful markers that he likes to write and draw on as well.
Thank you for posting so many recent videos of autistic adults, particularly Black autistic adults. I just got diagnosed (at 23) but suspected I was autistic since I was 8 or 9. Seeing other people who share my experiences and feelings is always so affirming.
“Speech does not make people superior.” This is such a powerful statement, wow. As someone who has had a hard time communicating the same way others have around me my entire life, I really appreciate this, and it makes me feel validated. I’m going to remember these words and keep them with me! They are very simple yet so profound, because there’s really so much tied to them. Thank you TJ for your advocacy and insight. 🙌 you communicate beautifully.
I really can relate to TJ on the speech component - "Speech does not make people superior.” as I am deaf myself and I get so tired of the constant emphasis on speech just to "fit in" with hearing society and make it "easier for nondisabled people to interact with us." which has been said to me on multiple occasions. Communication in all its modes is so important to be accepted and allowed. Loved this video and really enjoyed TJ. Such a smart, lovely woman.
As myself with autism, I can understand where she's coming from. Unfortunately that's just not how the world works sadly. The issue that I always deal with is the fact that neurotypicals have a bad habit of being vague and not providing enough context about what they're saying. Because of that I'm left having to guess what they meant, or I end up in an argument with them just cuz I'm trying to understand what they were saying. I swear it's like neurotypicals like to assume that everybody is a know-it-all.
Yeah, I hate it when I ask for clarification and am either told, "You know what I meant," or worse, "If you don't know what I meant, I'm not going to explain it to you."
I know it's not the same, but I am dyspraxic so similar And I have this issue a lot. I once was having a conversation with an NT about it as it came up in general conversation. The issue is that NT's are able to "fill in the gaps" we are not and in doing so they will more often than not come up with the same thing in the gap. Ie what's in the gap is so obvious to them and it's so obvious that it's reasonable to assume the receiver will know as well. However, because we(neurodiverse people) don't have this ability it's not obvious to us so we need more context than a NT.
A great interview. As identical twins on the autism spectrum, we find AAC really helpful to us, it helps us to speak when we are unable to. We are verbal but we have times where our communication Isn’t being understood or we aren’t communicating verbally how we feel or what we need. It’s really nice to see another autistic person that is verbal using AAC. Its a really helpful thing for many autistic people.
Thank you for talking about your experiences, TJ. I have a 11 y.o. son diagnosed with autism, and it helped my wife recognize that she likely would also be diagnosed as such (now that we've learned so much more about it with my son). My son talks very fast, but I can see the processing delays and hearing speech. My wife has processing delays both on hearing and speaking. People talking about it like you help me get more inside the experience, so that I can better help how I communicate with them. And thank you for talking more about the Black autistic experience. It is a terrible fact of our society that Black people are simply treated differently when it comes to neurodiversity or mental health issues. And thank you, Chris, for having TJ on.
TJ is a very smart and courageous woman. Intersectionality between race and disability is something you don't hear about much, and I'm glad she has brought attention to it. Having to decide between keeping your children safe and allowing them to be comfortable and express themselves genuinely is a decision no parent should ever have to make, and unfortunately most white people (like myself) just never have that reality cross our minds. I hope TJ and her kids are doing well and having a good day!
I am an educator and I watch every single one of the SBSK videos. I have learned so much from this channel over the years; both as a teacher and as a person. I wish videos like this were shown school- and district-wide for professional development rather than the often unrelatable slideshows with repetitive, bulleted material. This kind of straight-from-the-heart information is the best way to learn about our students and the different needs and struggles they may have. Thank you TJ for sharing your story and for your passionate advocacy!
I respectfully disagree. Tone is a necessary part of good communication. Without it, words are often misunderstood. We see this problem in social media and text messages. I get why she needs the device but I don't agree that it's a better way of communicating in general. It works for her and others that struggle with verbal communication, however, and that's fine.
@@tigresmom5654 Im not sure, that it really worked for her. Although she knew that there is no need to speak out loud in this interview situation, she used her device very rare in it. Most of the time she was speaking aloud. Why, if not because she prefered to talk like that herself. I apologize for my English and hope you will unterstand it even though.
@@MireilleSXXX As she says in the interview, she has a lot of internalized ableism. In other words, society has told her so much and so often that she must speak with her mouth that she feels pressured to. She is self-conscious of what others will think if she uses a device instead. I do understand what people are saying about tone and facial expressions, but these are two things autistic people often struggle with with verbal communication anyway.
im schizo affective and had roommates in psychiatry with autism and after years theyre still my friends and wonderful people. i can definately understand that speech is not the go to communication as for me, its hard to explain what my psychotic episodes were like almost impossible to understand the hallucinations and delusions
My Dr. told me several years ago that I'm on the autistic spectrum. I've never been diagnosed though. This subject interests me a lot, thank you, great and informative interview 💜
I'm a teenager on the autism spectrum, and I love watching these videos. It's so cool to get an introspective into another person's life, especially if they are considered "different." It's absolutley fascinating.
I really agree with the statement that we should include different forms of communications in our schools. It would be helpful for every children, not just autistic ones. I am not autistic but I was very shy in school and I didn’t speak most of the times, but later I realised that I can communicate better using body language, face expressions. And these thing are not taught but they should be. You are a great advocate! 👏
Thank you, Chris and TJ, for this interview. I think this interview is particularly important because you discussed the impact of being autistic and Black.
So happy you are giving this interview. Even if someone is verbal, they can still find vocal speech to be an uphill battle. I have heard that schools often don't think that a child is eligible for AAC if they have some language. I think anyone on the spectrum should have AAC access.
Most people listen to respond, not to actually understand the speaker. TJ's way of communication slows down the conversation which helps me to listen rather than just jump in (something that I am working on.) I hope that more people become aware of this and focus more on listening in their communication. Trying to say something in a larger group frustrates me too and I end up not saying anything.
What a beautiful woman. TJ is intelligent, and so driven to make things better for herself, her children and the world. I believe SBSK subscribers are empathetic for all humans, and are eager to learn!
I'm autistic too, recently diagnosed. I work in retail so sometimes I can communicate by speaking, but near the end of the day I get socially exhausted and don't really say anything, and they take that as rudeness.. even though I wear a lanyard that says I'm autistic please be patient
I relate to this so strongly. I’m late diagnosed autistic with APD, a balance disorder and additional co morbidities. I learn ASL to communicate and use sim comm to help pace my speech. It’s really dangerous to push us to present NT nonstop. Because my family was in denial I got pushed too hard. I’ve been burned out for 5 years and have a functional neurological disorder I’m learning to manage.
Wow just WOW. just when I think Chris couldn't amaze me anymore then he has already, he does it. I am so happy for everyone involved that he asked questions about race and autism together. I really enjoy how she opened up more and it became easier for her to share more and faster with Chris. Very beautiful woman on the inside and out. God bless her and her family, seriously I loved this 💜
tj, this interview was wonderfully candid - you are an excellent advocate! and chris, i'm so grateful that you're purposefully intersectional in your interviews. seeing autistic women especially is so meaningful!
Another incredibly wholesome interview. I am a person with a stutter and with Asperger's and can relate in some ways. People expect me to answer them on the phone e.t.c., and if I can't speak, they think and sometimes even tell to my face that I'm impolite, while I'm just unable to press words into the air.
I really liked this interview, especially at the end where they describe all the different situations of ND people. A lot of NT people really don't fully grasp that it IS a spectrum and someone can live in a facility and need lots of daily living support and someone else can live alone and have a career, but that we all are impacted by ASD in ways that really affect our lives.
watching this Video was Kind of calming for me. TJs voice calms me down. I just needed this. And as much as I love to hear people advocate for topics thatbare very emotional, i was already overwhelmed before watching this Video so it brought me down and helped me relac while listening and learning. thank you keep up the great work
I was diagnosed with Autism as an adult, and watching this has really opened my eyes to the ways I use to communicate. I sometimes use visual or audio clips to get my point across. I never thought anything of it, it was just the way I worked but after being diagnosed, I realised it was part of my Autism. This is a very enlightening video
my ex boyfriend is autistic and he would struggle to communicate with his voice from time to time. I wish I was more educated on this topic at the time we dated because this caused me so much unnecessary frustration because I’d insist on him just “saying it” when I should have been more patient and understanding.
Everyone learns and grows, I would not have known anything like this if not for this channel. The best you can do is move on and be a better person, that's the most anyone can do. Wishing you well!
As someone who works with kids with autism I have so so so many questions for you TJ! You have an amazing way of explaining your situation to people who may not have experience.
As someone who used to work with a lot of autistic kids Please be careful, I'm not sure what your workplace is like but there is a problem with those in power and working with these kids to deny them agency and independence etc. Try to not force them to do too many things out of their comfort zone, and do not force them to stop stimmimg or change how they stim as long as it is not hurting themselves or others. Also, you were probably taught (as was I) to use person first language (kids with autism) but the majority of autistic adults prefer identity first language (autistic kids, autistic adults, etc). The fact that you watch this channel is a good start, but yeah as someone who worked in a job like that in my opinion there is a big problem with how people approach and try to help autistic and ND kids - trying to change who they fundamentally are won't work, only causes stress and trauma to that child, instead of uplifting them and educating those around them and promoting patience and empathy. Coming from someone who has ADHD and is also probably autistic :) (sorry this got so long didn't mean to bombard you, I just feel very passionately about this)
Hi TJ, I really enjoyed this video. I’m not very technologically inclined, so learning about ACC was fascinating. For the record, when you were speaking directly I found you very warm, personable and easy to understand.
I'm so glad to see a public interview of such an intelligent autistic person articulating these problems. As an autistic person myself, I often find it difficult to explain these things in the moment - the difficulties, the difference, the emotions - and this video gives me a new language to speak these thoughts with.
😭😭😭 this is so healing. So grateful for her for putting herself out there. I feel such deep connection and hope because of the normalizing of who we are!
This is so true. The focus should ALWAYS be on communication rather than speech. A speech-generating device is the exact same as using speech as communication. It has all the core words, the opportunity to type your own words, it provides people who have limited to no communication to speaking. I have seen children who were believe to never be able to communicate use a device, and it aided in their verbal communication as well. AAC truly is worth considering if you feel your child or another adult are in need of another way of communicating. Even if it is for the purpose of assisting, like for this individual, it will definitely be worth considering.
TJ, thank you so much for sharing your story. I've grown up, worked & volunteered with autistic people all my life. They're such a pleasure to be around. I would highly recommend that (if you haven't done it already) you get autism wristbands for your sons to wear when out & about to make officers & others aware & less likely to respond inappropriately to your sons. I would also recommend getting a sign for your car that tells people there are autistic people in the car. That way if you get into any sort of emergency situation, the people helping you can respond more appropriately to the situation. I really hope this helps you, as much as it's helped friends who I've recommended it to.
This is an amazing and extremely educational video for most folks who only know about autism from portrayals in movies and TV. The only ones shown are very much at one end of the scale and are always non-verbal and afraid of everything. I think it's wonderful to see someone who most people wouldn't even know is autistic. And it's so important for everyone to see that there is indeed a spectrum. Also, it's so impressive how articulate TJ is in spoken communications when she explains how much better she can communicate with her AAC. Thanks to TJ for agreeing to video this conversation. I hope it helps her and other people with autism by educating the rest of us!
I love that you are doing so much better now at interviewing adults on your channel and making the interviews feel different in tone then the kid interviews . Much respect.
I love TJ’s account ! I’m so excited to see them here. What an incredible autistic advocate they are, both for the intersectionality of Black Autistics but also for those who are non speaking and minimally speaking ! I’m Autistic and have been considering trying AAC out myself. :)
It's very valuable to teach kids how to best move thru society whatever their color or ability. People need to know because every action has consequence. But awareness is important too..
I have my adult autism and adhd assessment in a week! I was never diagnosed as a child as it was missed and my old family raised me to believe I was wierd and the odd one out. If I'd been diagnosed earlier on I could have had so much more support. It's nice to see people recognising it more in adults. I has a stigma of being a naughty child diagnosis and that just not so! Think hardest part for me is socialising, multitasking and people thinking I'm rude or uninterested when it couldn't be further from the truth! Thank you or helping to open people's eyes
When this was very eye opening about race and autism and how other forms of communication are so much more accurate. I really liked this and I agree that society needs to focus on things other than speech for communication.
I feel like I understand how TJ feels: I can communicate well enough verbally, but it's only when I communicate via writing that I can say precisely what I mean.
Every autistic person I know and seen is highly intelligent and kind-hearted, some of the most amazing individuals in the world, much respect and love to all autistic folks out there ! You guys are so inspiring
It's actually the same as how people would rather text than talk on the phone but it's just an in person version of that. I actually def understand the logic of that, you can say more and in the exact way you want to say it before it's spoken into existence. So honestly it's not that weird at all.
I love that mindset of TJ's, it should be more about communication than about speech. Couldn't agree more! What an awesome person you are, TJ. I hope moving forward that more people make the space for you to communicate in the way that feels most comfortable and natural to you. 🧡🌻
Well that was eye-opener! My niece is said to have it. Her eye contact is very brief. She is 12. But she doesn’t have any speech issues, yet she doesn’t like to talk. Any attempt at having a conversation with her is bound to fail. But she writes so well, so clearly. In fact, her teachers say that she writes more than necessary, and that she has an urge to elaborate every tiny point.
Thank you for this entire video. I love her communication, the discussion on intersectionality. Race matters, not because we want it to but because the system was racialized at its inception and true advocacy and change cannot come when all issues aren't included in the action plan. Love this channel!
Great interview! thank you! For people who communicate easily with words it can be difficult to understand the point of view of an autistic person. We need more videos like this!
Love the video, I have a sibling that was recently diagnosed with autism's grade 2 (we suspected he had because I have a cousin with it and others with other disabilities) so is really special to see that there are so many ways to communicate. My little brother last month turned 6 years old but last year around June he was able to speak (before he talked like a baby, could said some words but not a whole sentence) and the change he has had in this year and a half is amazing for our family. He has conversations with us now, like the Miss said, sometimes he is not able to express himself and would get angry or go away when is upset with me (we have an age gap of 18 years so sometimes I don't want to play with him), before he didn't like to give hugs but now he does and even run to give them, love my little brother so much ~~~ Now that we have a diagnosis for him and he loves to play outside now (before he was afraid of a swing, slide and other children's games but now no) One of our cousins has a son a little younger than my brother and they play together and that has make him more open to express himself. It was a wholesome video, thanks for sharing your story and if somebody read this thanks.
Amazing video, thank you so much for the interview and education. I remember my earliest childhood when i didn't talk much because of trauma. I really felt like my mouth was too heavy to move for speaking and instead i was feeling like my fronthead would explode of trying to send telepathic thoughts.
Thank you so much for bringing up intersectionality! I'm white and don't know a ton about autism but I didn't actually think/realise there are additional challenges to being black and autistic. It was very educational. I initially wanted to see this video because I have a cousin who's non-verbal and the other verbalises so I wanted to know more. I ended up learning more than initially intended and I'm very grateful for this amazing interview! Thank you so much TJ for sharing your experience! I think you're helping countless people, through education, advocacy and support!
Thank you so much for bringing up the additional danger and stigma many autistic people experience because of their race. So helpful to hear your perspective!!
I have the opposite problem! I always feel pressured to communicate via text or email. There are many situations in which I would feel more comfortable speaking via phone, particularly when it comes to communicating medical information. It really irks me that doctors expect me to discuss personal medical information via email.
it all starts in the school system!! i wish asl was more available in public schools, im in my first year of college and it’s the first time i’ve been able to take a class for it. like you said tj, the bias towards speaking individuals not only hurts non speakers but it doesnt allow speakers to even take steps towards being more inclusive. society needs to place more value on silence. with social media, music, news, etc bringing in so much outside stimuli we no longer allow ourselves to be comfortable in silence and i feel that if we are able to reach that point then, finally will the biases begin to break down.
I'm a 32 yr white Autistic ADHD woman. Thank you so much for sharing the struggles for black autistic people, I hadn't even thought about those things. So thank you for broadening my view on autism for people of color 🤎🖤
I've never identified with anyone in my whole life more than this person. Just off of a few sentences alone. Advice to my brothers and sisters who also relate: We need to push our limits, we have no choice. Society is not kind to us. We need to accept that because them being better is not realistic. Btw, I would never be able to form that sentence verbally on the spot to ANYONE the way I did just now. But I want to be able to feel the good things normal people feel in day to day life that they take for granted. I deserve it, I don't deserve everything that happens as a result of being this way. I will fight for it. And no one will know the struggle. "You don't like to talk." No that's not it "You're so serious, weird" No not quite. If those are true, it'd be for different reasons than the ones you see to draw these conclusions "You're slow" No, I'm actually not. Really
As a fellow autistic adult I'm so happy that TJ is getting this message out there! I only need assistive speech technology sometimes (when overloaded or in a meltdown) but it needs to be more accessible and acceptable for all of us to use.
Believe it or not, speech has been a detriment to my life. It's been a failure in communicating to others, especially about what I want and need. And plenty of people tell me to keep speaking, to keep going at it until I get good at it. But I can't. I can't process a conversation in a group, I can't respond. Meanwhile if I am able to type with text, I can be so much more expressive and even mask where I am not able to in person.
It’s the same for me! I’m not as articulate when i talk or i can’t find the right words but typing/texting I am always able to have more time to think about what i want to say. Not being able to verbalize how you feel doesn’t not make you less intelligent.
I'm an autistic adult who is diagnosed with and I personally don't use adaptive technology irl but I can respect and understand why some may need to use it. But I personally think its equivalent to tone indicators and how they're used online. I was originally diagnosed with high functioning autism but since that label isn't actively used any more so I suppose it's just autism or ASD as another word for it. I was diagnosed when I was 3. And my brother is also diagnosed with autism and goes to special school which I never had a opportunity to go to special school but I'm glad he made it in ❤️ If anyone's got questions, feel free to ask away and I'll see if I can reply (thats if youtube notifications will show them up)!
It was great to meet you TJ! TJ has a channel you can subscribe to at youtube.com/@nighfunctioningautism . I highly recommend subscribing!
Subscribed. 🙂
NIGH functioning autism is so funny!🤣
Its awesome that Chris is acknowledging the intersectionality of race when it comes to autism
@@mymylauren yeah, its unfortunate that theres people in the comments who are butthurt about race and intersectionality
Hi!
Love her shirt! "Not being able to speak is not the same as not having anything to say."
So much yesssssss!
There are also many people who speak a lot, with nothing to say.
@@AnonYmous-si5qv exactly
I read half of your comment and i was like not being able to speak is not the same as not speaking lmao. Rush Hour reference if u know what i mean
My mom always used to say she spoke with an accent, it doesn’t mean she thinks with one.
"society needs to focus less on speech and more on communication" YESSSSSSS!👏
Omg f yes
the world isint going to adapt to outliers buddy, not how it works
@@ewaberchulska if you truly believe that, then hopefully you don’t become an “outlier” ♥️ life if full of many fun surprises, be careful…
@@ewaberchulska Wait until you find out these “outliers” are apart of the world and general public 😱😱😱
@@imstillwonderingg yea I would know because I'm one of them ,the world still does not need to adapt to a minority
What a beautiful and insightful woman. I love how her face lit up with the most genuine smile when she explained how it was easier to communicate with Chris because he was asking her about something she loves.
You probably cry a lot. What a sensitive warm great enlightened spirit you have right? you're so special
@@pio7763 ?
@@pio7763 I feel like you’re always purposefully leaving bitter comments. You okay?
The fact that she said "we can't be our disabled selves" was so powerful. I really hope the world changes and I really hope I can contribute to that change.
Yeah, I need to make more allowances for certain people in my life.
For me too. Thanks for bringing that back up!♥️
As an autistic adult, I'm so very glad you're discussing this! ND people should be given this tech instead of being coached incessantly to speak aloud. Not all ND people need it, but how many are considered low intelligence simply because they struggle with speech?
In school and at home, I struggled so much with getting my actual internal dialogue out that people always considered me not as intelligent, but I would always do amazing project work so they would ask if my parents did it for me.
It is so hurtful to be considered unintelligent when you know that you do understand things but can't convey them in a traditionally accepted human communication format, so you remain silent and deep in thought instead.
I wish I had a device to talk for me when I was that young age. At 42 now, I no longer have the need to communicate to prove myself as worthy. I just do my own thing, but the experience still left it's mark on me forever.
@@JAMQWERTHugs*
Just have to say tho that I'm so ecstatic to hear that you have the genuine awareness of your truly voracious worth and importance no matter how you're able to communicate! I'm so very happy that you seem to adamantly and confidently believe the fact that despite how others may believe, decide, and judge your specific caliber of intellectual capacity to be low solely based upon how you communicate, that you've still kept such a well-deserving pride within yourself because of you confidently having cognizance that you truly indeed have a high level of intelligence no matter what any other person may assume of you! It's awesome that you realized that ultimately their opinions truly don't matter. And I sincerely love and admire that you wholeheartedly have chosen to proudly and boldly allow yourself to feel so free to just do your own thing, but then also all a while you're swiftly boldly disregarding that false narrative/ notion that the obligation to communicate up to a certain standard approved by our society is what determines or proves someone's worthiness and degree of intelligence because you're completely aware of that being so beyond extremly fictitious and desperately needs to change!
Anyway, sorry for such a long reply, I just really felt moved to say all that to you. And wanted to tell you that I very much liked your whole comment and I think you seem like you're smart and very awesome! Sending hugs and hugs to you!
@@rachelfreeman9390 when I was a child I scored 97 on an iq test, which is considered “average “!
I think what you mean as an adult with autism
@@meganchristian7085 most autistics prefer that instead of "person with autism". It's what we are from birth, not something we have that can be cured.
Every minute of this video gets a thumbs-up from me...TJ is so insightful on what it means to be autistic AND to be the parent of an autistic child AND to be an autistic person of color to an autistic boy/young man of color, phew! Many blessing to her and her family. And, Chris, thank you so much for not being afraid to ask and point out the very real struggle of being a person with a disability/disabled person of color. I have a 16 y.o. son on the autism spectrum with developmental delays and my chest tightens at the mere thought of him having to face the real world and the added layer of not being white-others may not see and understand my baby like I see and understand him. Education is key!
🙌🏽 Yes !
Bless you and your son 🙏❤️
Do you think it would help to have a business card or something to give with lisence and registration that says you're autistic for those cop situations? It could become standard practice like the bracelets to identify certain medical conditions in emergencies.
Someone with autism/A parent of child with autism
LOVE the t-shirt!
Hearing her talk about how she has taught her kids to "mask" for their own safety is just heartbreaking.
Racism has got to stop!
What an intelligent, insightful and inspiring woman! 👍💙
wow. you are so brave speaking of these truly profound and unheard of ideas, racism really has got to stop. what a groundbreaking revalation
@@ewaberchulska wow! What a great comment!! 😂🙄
What she said is so powerful…
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“Speech does not make people superior.”
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She’s so calm and wise. Loved this video. She shared A LOT of gems and importance things society always ignores or disregards.
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Difficulty does not symbolize inadequacy. Just listen to how articulate she is…we are all different and most of us require more patience.
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Sometimes all it takes is patience and a willingness to learn/understand how to communicate with each individual..as each of us communicate differently.
Love this comment. I totally agree!
So profound
I am a preschool teacher who was recently introduced to AAC for one of my autistic students. It's so awesome to hear about the experience of an adult who uses a device to communicate. I also appreciated that we were able to hear TJ's perspective as the mom of black autistic boys.
I think you mean for your students with autism
@@meganchristian7085 no, I mean my autistic student. "People first" language had been debunked as not helpful, accurate, or a desired label by autistic people. The title of this video is literally "An Interview with an Autistic Adult." Not "An Interview with an Adult with Autism."
Wow. This really opened my eyes. At 22 although I'm not diagnosed I've been suspecting for a while now. I need time to process and respond and people in my life never gave me that time. From that you learn to just be quiet. Since a child I would notice others speaking effortlessly where as I couldn't get words out. So people place labels, look down on you, and dismiss your intelligence. I've always loved to write. I can share all my thoughts precisely and clear online, but if I were to try and speak in person chances are it comes out jumbled or rushed or as TJ mentioned, not what I really meant. Thank you for sharing.
It can take me days or longer to process something, particularly in a confrontational situation. I still don't know quite what to do with that long of a processing time except maybe say, "I'm going to need some time to process this." I used to like to write, too, but I was forced to deal with a conflict by e-mail, and because I thoughtfully chose my words, I was accused of liking to "play with words." Since that trauma, it's sometimes hard for me to write even a short e-mail without spending hours editing it and still not being sure I am saying things right.
I agree with this. I definitely prefer text communication and I find myself sort of “freezing up” in situations where I’m talking in-person or with a group of people. I think a device like the one TJ has would really help me and a lot of autistic people (I am not diagnosed but definitely suspecting).
Hello there! I'm 16 years old and a junior in high school... we have a program at our school where kids with critical disabilities are welcomed into a classroom like kids in other schools or most children's day to day life. I spend 2 of my study halls and my lunch in that classroom, it allows me to feel safe or calm. I came from a very stressful class today and as soon as I saw the two specific people in that class, I felt calm. My legs stopped shaking, my fists were un-balled and I was sitting with a friend who's in a wheelchair and a smile on my face. My GAD (generalized Anxiety Disorder) was nothing at the moment. I've been watching this channel since I was around the age of 7 years old. I always wanted to go into a career field that works with children that have disabilities. I decided that this year I will be focusing on an Occupational Therapist for children with disabilities. This channel has helped me in so many ways. More than most will understand, so thank you SBSK from the bottom of my heart.
-Mo
(Thank you for all of your wonderful and kind words!)
That would be awesome.
@@jmk1962 Thank you, truly. :)
And I have no doubt you would make a great therapist, Mo. 💜
Thanks for sharing!
That is a great field! I am a Speech Language Pathologist, and Occupational Therapists really are a great help for children with disabilities. I work in a job along with Occupational Therapists and they really do wonders for these children.
I’m so happy to see her spreading awareness for my sons community (nonspeaking) as well as her own (autistic POC) I applied to share my sons journey with nonspeaking Autism - and possibly a little about my own diagnoses, and I pray I get a chance to share his magic with the world!! He is truly the most incredible person. Autistic people are amazing. ❤
My brother is nonverbal and autistic as well :) he's 7 years younger than me so he's still growing up while I'm an adult. Its been so cool seeing him grow and seeing him figure out alternative ways of communicating with us. He likes typing things out on the notes app of his phone the most, plus he also has whiteboards in various sizes (a big one at home, a medium sized one at home and a small travel size one) and tons of colorful markers that he likes to write and draw on as well.
Thank you for posting so many recent videos of autistic adults, particularly Black autistic adults. I just got diagnosed (at 23) but suspected I was autistic since I was 8 or 9. Seeing other people who share my experiences and feelings is always so affirming.
“Speech does not make people superior.” This is such a powerful statement, wow. As someone who has had a hard time communicating the same way others have around me my entire life, I really appreciate this, and it makes me feel validated. I’m going to remember these words and keep them with me! They are very simple yet so profound, because there’s really so much tied to them. Thank you TJ for your advocacy and insight. 🙌 you communicate beautifully.
I really can relate to TJ on the speech component - "Speech does not make people superior.” as I am deaf myself and I get so tired of the constant emphasis on speech just to "fit in" with hearing society and make it "easier for nondisabled people to interact with us." which has been said to me on multiple occasions. Communication in all its modes is so important to be accepted and allowed. Loved this video and really enjoyed TJ. Such a smart, lovely woman.
As myself with autism, I can understand where she's coming from. Unfortunately that's just not how the world works sadly. The issue that I always deal with is the fact that neurotypicals have a bad habit of being vague and not providing enough context about what they're saying. Because of that I'm left having to guess what they meant, or I end up in an argument with them just cuz I'm trying to understand what they were saying. I swear it's like neurotypicals like to assume that everybody is a know-it-all.
Yeah, I hate it when I ask for clarification and am either told, "You know what I meant," or worse, "If you don't know what I meant, I'm not going to explain it to you."
I know it's not the same, but I am dyspraxic so similar And I have this issue a lot. I once was having a conversation with an NT about it as it came up in general conversation. The issue is that NT's are able to "fill in the gaps" we are not and in doing so they will more often than not come up with the same thing in the gap. Ie what's in the gap is so obvious to them and it's so obvious that it's reasonable to assume the receiver will know as well. However, because we(neurodiverse people) don't have this ability it's not obvious to us so we need more context than a NT.
@@nightyew2160 or “you never listen”
Because they don't know you're autistic and most people around them aren't.
too true
A great interview. As identical twins on the autism spectrum, we find AAC really helpful to us, it helps us to speak when we are unable to. We are verbal but we have times where our communication Isn’t being understood or we aren’t communicating verbally how we feel or what we need. It’s really nice to see another autistic person that is verbal using AAC. Its a really helpful thing for many autistic people.
Thank you for talking about your experiences, TJ. I have a 11 y.o. son diagnosed with autism, and it helped my wife recognize that she likely would also be diagnosed as such (now that we've learned so much more about it with my son). My son talks very fast, but I can see the processing delays and hearing speech. My wife has processing delays both on hearing and speaking. People talking about it like you help me get more inside the experience, so that I can better help how I communicate with them. And thank you for talking more about the Black autistic experience. It is a terrible fact of our society that Black people are simply treated differently when it comes to neurodiversity or mental health issues.
And thank you, Chris, for having TJ on.
TJ is a very smart and courageous woman. Intersectionality between race and disability is something you don't hear about much, and I'm glad she has brought attention to it.
Having to decide between keeping your children safe and allowing them to be comfortable and express themselves genuinely is a decision no parent should ever have to make, and unfortunately most white people (like myself) just never have that reality cross our minds.
I hope TJ and her kids are doing well and having a good day!
Gosh the colour of a person's skin really, really dosen't matter.
I am an educator and I watch every single one of the SBSK videos. I have learned so much from this channel over the years; both as a teacher and as a person. I wish videos like this were shown school- and district-wide for professional development rather than the often unrelatable slideshows with repetitive, bulleted material. This kind of straight-from-the-heart information is the best way to learn about our students and the different needs and struggles they may have. Thank you TJ for sharing your story and for your passionate advocacy!
She is 100% correct, people using not verbal communication primarily adds volumes to our person to person interaction.
Agree!
I respectfully disagree. Tone is a necessary part of good communication. Without it, words are often misunderstood. We see this problem in social media and text messages. I get why she needs the device but I don't agree that it's a better way of communicating in general. It works for her and others that struggle with verbal communication, however, and that's fine.
@@tigresmom5654 Often tone is all people hear. But Im talking facial expressions and so much more.
@@tigresmom5654 Im not sure, that it really worked for her. Although she knew that there is no need to speak out loud in this interview situation, she used her device very rare in it. Most of the time she was speaking aloud. Why, if not because she prefered to talk like that herself. I apologize for my English and hope you will unterstand it even though.
@@MireilleSXXX As she says in the interview, she has a lot of internalized ableism. In other words, society has told her so much and so often that she must speak with her mouth that she feels pressured to. She is self-conscious of what others will think if she uses a device instead.
I do understand what people are saying about tone and facial expressions, but these are two things autistic people often struggle with with verbal communication anyway.
im schizo affective and had roommates in psychiatry with autism and after years theyre still my friends and wonderful people. i can definately understand that speech is not the go to communication as for me, its hard to explain what my psychotic episodes were like almost impossible to understand the hallucinations and delusions
My Dr. told me several years ago that I'm on the autistic spectrum. I've never been diagnosed though. This subject interests me a lot, thank you, great and informative interview 💜
I wish my doctor's could diagnosed me with autism but refused
I'm a teenager on the autism spectrum, and I love watching these videos. It's so cool to get an introspective into another person's life, especially if they are considered "different." It's absolutley fascinating.
Love what her shirt says 👍🏻❤️ Sometimes communicating during a conversation is tough because sometimes I feel overwhelmed
I really agree with the statement that we should include different forms of communications in our schools. It would be helpful for every children, not just autistic ones. I am not autistic but I was very shy in school and I didn’t speak most of the times, but later I realised that I can communicate better using body language, face expressions. And these thing are not taught but they should be. You are a great advocate! 👏
Thank you, Chris and TJ, for this interview. I think this interview is particularly important because you discussed the impact of being autistic and Black.
Wonderful♥️
So happy you are giving this interview. Even if someone is verbal, they can still find vocal speech to be an uphill battle. I have heard that schools often don't think that a child is eligible for AAC if they have some language. I think anyone on the spectrum should have AAC access.
"Focus less on speech and more on communication" I love that
This was one of the best interviews I’ve ever come across! I have 2 sons with autism and it has opened my eyes so much more!
Because of TJ I finally pursued my diagnosis for ADHD and autism. I love their essence as a human being and their posts.
Most people listen to respond, not to actually understand the speaker. TJ's way of communication slows down the conversation which helps me to listen rather than just jump in (something that I am working on.) I hope that more people become aware of this and focus more on listening in their communication. Trying to say something in a larger group frustrates me too and I end up not saying anything.
What a beautiful woman. TJ is intelligent, and so driven to make things better for herself, her children and the world. I believe SBSK subscribers are empathetic for all humans, and are eager to learn!
“if u can’t say it, then it’s not important” oof that hurt. thank u TJ and chris for this video❤️
I'm autistic too, recently diagnosed. I work in retail so sometimes I can communicate by speaking, but near the end of the day I get socially exhausted and don't really say anything, and they take that as rudeness.. even though I wear a lanyard that says I'm autistic please be patient
Tell me about your iq scores!
I relate to this so strongly. I’m late diagnosed autistic with APD, a balance disorder and additional co morbidities. I learn ASL to communicate and use sim comm to help pace my speech. It’s really dangerous to push us to present NT nonstop. Because my family was in denial I got pushed too hard. I’ve been burned out for 5 years and have a functional neurological disorder I’m learning to manage.
Thanks to this insightful and intelligent woman for sharing something new with me today! Love your channel, Chris! Keep doing the good work you do. ❤
Wow just WOW. just when I think Chris couldn't amaze me anymore then he has already, he does it. I am so happy for everyone involved that he asked questions about race and autism together. I really enjoy how she opened up more and it became easier for her to share more and faster with Chris. Very beautiful woman on the inside and out. God bless her and her family, seriously I loved this 💜
tj, this interview was wonderfully candid - you are an excellent advocate! and chris, i'm so grateful that you're purposefully intersectional in your interviews. seeing autistic women especially is so meaningful!
So happy to have met TJ and gotten a new perspective on how AAC is stigmatized and generally how it is such a life-saving tool for autistic people ❤
Another incredibly wholesome interview. I am a person with a stutter and with Asperger's and can relate in some ways. People expect me to answer them on the phone e.t.c., and if I can't speak, they think and sometimes even tell to my face that I'm impolite, while I'm just unable to press words into the air.
i have a stutter and a lisp, it used to embarrass me, talking on the phone is something i avoid as it stresses me out
I love her life 😮😮😮she’s so sweet
I always preferred to write over speaking . It's like night and day. Thank you for this informative video.
I really liked this interview, especially at the end where they describe all the different situations of ND people. A lot of NT people really don't fully grasp that it IS a spectrum and someone can live in a facility and need lots of daily living support and someone else can live alone and have a career, but that we all are impacted by ASD in ways that really affect our lives.
watching this Video was Kind of calming for me. TJs voice calms me down. I just needed this. And as much as I love to hear people advocate for topics thatbare very emotional, i was already overwhelmed before watching this Video so it brought me down and helped me relac while listening and learning. thank you keep up the great work
I was diagnosed with Autism as an adult, and watching this has really opened my eyes to the ways I use to communicate. I sometimes use visual or audio clips to get my point across. I never thought anything of it, it was just the way I worked but after being diagnosed, I realised it was part of my Autism. This is a very enlightening video
Yes we need more poc representation of being on the spectrum!!❤
YESSSS💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯
my ex boyfriend is autistic and he would struggle to communicate with his voice from time to time. I wish I was more educated on this topic at the time we dated because this caused me so much unnecessary frustration because I’d insist on him just “saying it” when I should have been more patient and understanding.
That's his problem not yours. He want you're support he need to explain it to you.
Everyone learns and grows, I would not have known anything like this if not for this channel. The best you can do is move on and be a better person, that's the most anyone can do. Wishing you well!
@Pio
I dunno why your being so salty in the comments dude, just let it be if you can't be respectful.
I have an 8 year old son that has autism and is nonverbal and I just love how you are advocating for my child. Thank you very much!
This is pretty cool that she's using an AAC to communicate. It's awesome 😊. My husband is autistic as well but he's still an awesome person.
As someone who works with kids with autism I have so so so many questions for you TJ! You have an amazing way of explaining your situation to people who may not have experience.
As someone who used to work with a lot of autistic kids Please be careful, I'm not sure what your workplace is like but there is a problem with those in power and working with these kids to deny them agency and independence etc. Try to not force them to do too many things out of their comfort zone, and do not force them to stop stimmimg or change how they stim as long as it is not hurting themselves or others. Also, you were probably taught (as was I) to use person first language (kids with autism) but the majority of autistic adults prefer identity first language (autistic kids, autistic adults, etc). The fact that you watch this channel is a good start, but yeah as someone who worked in a job like that in my opinion there is a big problem with how people approach and try to help autistic and ND kids - trying to change who they fundamentally are won't work, only causes stress and trauma to that child, instead of uplifting them and educating those around them and promoting patience and empathy. Coming from someone who has ADHD and is also probably autistic :) (sorry this got so long didn't mean to bombard you, I just feel very passionately about this)
Hi TJ, I really enjoyed this video. I’m not very technologically inclined, so learning about ACC was fascinating. For the record, when you were speaking directly I found you very warm, personable and easy to understand.
She has probably learned to mask so well as a survival reflex for the reasons she spoke of
I'm so glad to see a public interview of such an intelligent autistic person articulating these problems. As an autistic person myself, I often find it difficult to explain these things in the moment - the difficulties, the difference, the emotions - and this video gives me a new language to speak these thoughts with.
😭😭😭 this is so healing. So grateful for her for putting herself out there. I feel such deep connection and hope because of the normalizing of who we are!
This is so true. The focus should ALWAYS be on communication rather than speech. A speech-generating device is the exact same as using speech as communication. It has all the core words, the opportunity to type your own words, it provides people who have limited to no communication to speaking. I have seen children who were believe to never be able to communicate use a device, and it aided in their verbal communication as well. AAC truly is worth considering if you feel your child or another adult are in need of another way of communicating. Even if it is for the purpose of assisting, like for this individual, it will definitely be worth considering.
Hi everyone: It's so nice to see you again on RUclips. I want to meet you all one day. Take care and stay safe.
TJ, thank you so much for sharing your story. I've grown up, worked & volunteered with autistic people all my life. They're such a pleasure to be around. I would highly recommend that (if you haven't done it already) you get autism wristbands for your sons to wear when out & about to make officers & others aware & less likely to respond inappropriately to your sons. I would also recommend getting a sign for your car that tells people there are autistic people in the car. That way if you get into any sort of emergency situation, the people helping you can respond more appropriately to the situation. I really hope this helps you, as much as it's helped friends who I've recommended it to.
This is an amazing and extremely educational video for most folks who only know about autism from portrayals in movies and TV. The only ones shown are very much at one end of the scale and are always non-verbal and afraid of everything. I think it's wonderful to see someone who most people wouldn't even know is autistic. And it's so important for everyone to see that there is indeed a spectrum.
Also, it's so impressive how articulate TJ is in spoken communications when she explains how much better she can communicate with her AAC. Thanks to TJ for agreeing to video this conversation. I hope it helps her and other people with autism by educating the rest of us!
I love that you are doing so much better now at interviewing adults on your channel and making the interviews feel different in tone then the kid interviews . Much respect.
I love TJ’s account ! I’m so excited to see them here. What an incredible autistic advocate they are, both for the intersectionality of Black Autistics but also for those who are non speaking and minimally speaking ! I’m Autistic and have been considering trying AAC out myself. :)
It's very valuable to teach kids how to best move thru society whatever their color or ability. People need to know because every action has consequence. But awareness is important too..
Thank you for sharing your love with us. I cried when hearing this important truth about guidance to children.
I have my adult autism and adhd assessment in a week! I was never diagnosed as a child as it was missed and my old family raised me to believe I was wierd and the odd one out. If I'd been diagnosed earlier on I could have had so much more support. It's nice to see people recognising it more in adults. I has a stigma of being a naughty child diagnosis and that just not so! Think hardest part for me is socialising, multitasking and people thinking I'm rude or uninterested when it couldn't be further from the truth! Thank you or helping to open people's eyes
TJ, your outlook on speech is very inspiring. Thanks for sharing.
When this was very eye opening about race and autism and how other forms of communication are so much more accurate. I really liked this and I agree that society needs to focus on things other than speech for communication.
I feel like I understand how TJ feels: I can communicate well enough verbally, but it's only when I communicate via writing that I can say precisely what I mean.
Thank you very much, Chris. The more we understand about differences, the better the world can be.
Every autistic person I know and seen is highly intelligent and kind-hearted, some of the most amazing individuals in the world, much respect and love to all autistic folks out there ! You guys are so inspiring
I am an autistic 15 year old❤. So amazing to have it makes me feel special.🎉
I love this, I’m so tired of people telling others to “ use their words”. We can communicate with out speaking
It's actually the same as how people would rather text than talk on the phone but it's just an in person version of that. I actually def understand the logic of that, you can say more and in the exact way you want to say it before it's spoken into existence. So honestly it's not that weird at all.
I’m autistic and prefer calling to texting 😭😭😭 I can’t hear your tone over text
@@straberryshinigami15g97 my ideal scenario would be: I text, you talk 🙂
@@sarahleony SAME!!
@@straberryshinigami15g97 hi there
I love that mindset of TJ's, it should be more about communication than about speech. Couldn't agree more! What an awesome person you are, TJ. I hope moving forward that more people make the space for you to communicate in the way that feels most comfortable and natural to you. 🧡🌻
I found this interview to be very insightful and informative. I want to know more! TJ has so much to share with the world!
Well that was eye-opener!
My niece is said to have it. Her eye contact is very brief. She is 12. But she doesn’t have any speech issues, yet she doesn’t like to talk. Any attempt at having a conversation with her is bound to fail. But she writes so well, so clearly.
In fact, her teachers say that she writes more than necessary, and that she has an urge to elaborate every tiny point.
Thank you for this entire video. I love her communication, the discussion on intersectionality. Race matters, not because we want it to but because the system was racialized at its inception and true advocacy and change cannot come when all issues aren't included in the action plan. Love this channel!
Im autistic and I feel this so deeply. So glad she is bringing awareness to this. 🤍
Love the idea of kids growing up with more ways of communicating! Glad us adults are becoming more aware so that it can be implemented.
Great interview! thank you! For people who communicate easily with words it can be difficult to understand the point of view of an autistic person. We need more videos like this!
Wow, TJ is so intelligent and articulate! Thank you for sharing her story!
Thank you for sharing your ideas and opinions, TJ. You did it beautifully both through your spoken words and your AAC.
Love the video, I have a sibling that was recently diagnosed with autism's grade 2 (we suspected he had because I have a cousin with it and others with other disabilities) so is really special to see that there are so many ways to communicate.
My little brother last month turned 6 years old but last year around June he was able to speak (before he talked like a baby, could said some words but not a whole sentence) and the change he has had in this year and a half is amazing for our family. He has conversations with us now, like the Miss said, sometimes he is not able to express himself and would get angry or go away when is upset with me (we have an age gap of 18 years so sometimes I don't want to play with him), before he didn't like to give hugs but now he does and even run to give them, love my little brother so much ~~~ Now that we have a diagnosis for him and he loves to play outside now (before he was afraid of a swing, slide and other children's games but now no)
One of our cousins has a son a little younger than my brother and they play together and that has make him more open to express himself.
It was a wholesome video, thanks for sharing your story and if somebody read this thanks.
Amazing video, thank you so much for the interview and education.
I remember my earliest childhood when i didn't talk much because of trauma. I really felt like my mouth was too heavy to move for speaking and instead i was feeling like my fronthead would explode of trying to send telepathic thoughts.
Thank you so much for bringing up intersectionality! I'm white and don't know a ton about autism but I didn't actually think/realise there are additional challenges to being black and autistic. It was very educational. I initially wanted to see this video because I have a cousin who's non-verbal and the other verbalises so I wanted to know more. I ended up learning more than initially intended and I'm very grateful for this amazing interview!
Thank you so much TJ for sharing your experience! I think you're helping countless people, through education, advocacy and support!
This channel has further inspired me to go into working with SEN children. Thank you.
Such warmth, compassion and intelligence. I will follow her as well!
Thank you so much for bringing up the additional danger and stigma many autistic people experience because of their race. So helpful to hear your perspective!!
So happy to see TJ on your channel! ❤ She is so cool!
I love watching those with disabilities advocating for themselves and for their communities.
i love ur instagram account, its been so helpful! im so happy to see an interview from you! im fangirling right now
I have the opposite problem! I always feel pressured to communicate via text or email. There are many situations in which I would feel more comfortable speaking via phone, particularly when it comes to communicating medical information. It really irks me that doctors expect me to discuss personal medical information via email.
it all starts in the school system!! i wish asl was more available in public schools, im in my first year of college and it’s the first time i’ve been able to take a class for it. like you said tj, the bias towards speaking individuals not only hurts non speakers but it doesnt allow speakers to even take steps towards being more inclusive. society needs to place more value on silence. with social media, music, news, etc bringing in so much outside stimuli we no longer allow ourselves to be comfortable in silence and i feel that if we are able to reach that point then, finally will the biases begin to break down.
I have selective mutism and people judge me before they even know me :(
I'm a 32 yr white Autistic ADHD woman. Thank you so much for sharing the struggles for black autistic people, I hadn't even thought about those things. So thank you for broadening my view on autism for people of color 🤎🖤
with autism and ADHD
I've never identified with anyone in my whole life more than this person. Just off of a few sentences alone. Advice to my brothers and sisters who also relate: We need to push our limits, we have no choice. Society is not kind to us. We need to accept that because them being better is not realistic. Btw, I would never be able to form that sentence verbally on the spot to ANYONE the way I did just now. But I want to be able to feel the good things normal people feel in day to day life that they take for granted. I deserve it, I don't deserve everything that happens as a result of being this way. I will fight for it. And no one will know the struggle.
"You don't like to talk." No that's not it
"You're so serious, weird" No not quite. If those are true, it'd be for different reasons than the ones you see to draw these conclusions
"You're slow" No, I'm actually not. Really
As a fellow autistic adult I'm so happy that TJ is getting this message out there! I only need assistive speech technology sometimes (when overloaded or in a meltdown) but it needs to be more accessible and acceptable for all of us to use.
How do u see life? And how to u see getting old?
Believe it or not, speech has been a detriment to my life. It's been a failure in communicating to others, especially about what I want and need. And plenty of people tell me to keep speaking, to keep going at it until I get good at it. But I can't. I can't process a conversation in a group, I can't respond. Meanwhile if I am able to type with text, I can be so much more expressive and even mask where I am not able to in person.
It’s the same for me! I’m not as articulate when i talk or i can’t find the right words but typing/texting I am always able to have more time to think about what i want to say. Not being able to verbalize how you feel doesn’t not make you less intelligent.
I'm an autistic adult who is diagnosed with and I personally don't use adaptive technology irl but I can respect and understand why some may need to use it. But I personally think its equivalent to tone indicators and how they're used online.
I was originally diagnosed with high functioning autism but since that label isn't actively used any more so I suppose it's just autism or ASD as another word for it.
I was diagnosed when I was 3. And my brother is also diagnosed with autism and goes to special school which I never had a opportunity to go to special school but I'm glad he made it in ❤️
If anyone's got questions, feel free to ask away and I'll see if I can reply (thats if youtube notifications will show them up)!
This has been one of the most informative video about autism and racial barriers/discrimination that sadly still exist here in the United States.
Thank you for sharing your truth and bravery with us. I appreciate you so much. I am autistic too.