He's 6 ft, fit, got a job, and his own apartment without roommates AT 22... She lost her mind. He's gonna have a new girl in like 5 minutes if he wants one.
This kid's father's a real man. Told the son exactly what he needed to know regardless it hurt or not. For a 22 year old to have his head screwed on right now a days hid father is right he is rare. His parents raised a good one.
I'm 100% confident that she either cheated already or at the very least intended to. That would also explain why she got mad at him for just smiling at another woman. Cheaters tend to project onto their partners.
If she did, she isn't very smart. Cheaters try to hide their affairs, not bring them to their SO's apartment. If it was an actual affair, they would meet at a hotel or his place. The ex clearly still has feelings for her and probably wanted more. I'm not sure what her thinking was, but I don't blame OP for making the decision he did.
That ex dude being cocky-part was the dead give away for me. I've met some mf that acted like that, merely for the fact, that he had hooked up with a chick that was a friend of mine and was secretly afraid about "competition" while kind of flexing about that without going to the point
@@wsol80no feelings. He just wanted to "lean" om her. And when he got bored dump. No one takes woman who is currently cheating or did before, for gf. She is just his amusement and toy for now. She cried because she understood how she fucked up
@@wsol80 She wasn't just not smart, she was cocky. Thought she could have this emotional affair (and that's what it was, not telling her bf the circumstances of "going back to the good old days when her ex could lean on her in rough times", acting guilty when her bf came home, lying that she wouldn't be upset the other way around, tending to her ex's needs over his) in the comfort of her bf's home, thinking her bf would be staying out longer for dinner. She thought she could fuck around and threw it all away.
Even if she didn't, her shock when he came home showed that she was entertaining the thought about getting back with her ex, which in my books is the same thing as cheating.
@@Dionysos_____Alters Let men be men. That guy needed a punch or two for his attitude. And it doesn't stop you from wacking your gf too, while you are at it.
A man with self respect. I remember a male friend of mine about his girlfriend cheating on him and he asked me how can I make this work? I preceded to show him some tough love. I directly quoted Billy from The Boys and told him “Where is your f@cking rage, your self respect”.
As a woman, I'm you with my male friends. They get cheated on and have been thoroughly brainwashed into thinking it's somehow their fault their partners cheated. They come to me asking how win the cheating partner back, and I'm like, baby boy, the first step is going to therapy to realize you deserve better. Most of them had narc moms and spineless/absent dads though.
So we all know that the woman not standing up for you in the presence of conflict of another man is a massive red flag, but they way the dad EXPLAINS it makes him the goat and clears up ANY confusion on the matter. Freaking Mr. Miyagi over here
I'm not saying he came to the wrong conclusion but all those "sure signs" are really not in my opinion. He's 22, so his girl is probably the same or even younger. The way OP explains it, things moved pretty fast and he reacted immediately after the ex asked the girl if she wants him to leave. To expect a 20ish year old to navigate two men playing power games and immediately cutting in when some snarky remark is done is just wild to me. Like every girl has a PhD in Bro all of a sudden. Not defending her or what came before. But other than not mentioning that the old friend was an ex (def. weird), I really don't see any transgression that couldn't be explained with immaturity or "it all happened so fast". Why even meet at his apartment, when she knows he could come home any second? To cheat? Naw. And if they already cheat, why not meet up the same way they already have been? Even him not feeling anything for her in that moment could just as well be a sign of him being overwhelmed and emotionally shutting down, since this was less than 24h later, if I read it right. His decision might be the right one in the end, but how he came there and the advice he was given based on it is pretty questionable, imo.
@@Michael_800 Emotional cheating is a thing and the fact she defended him and stood up for him means she was well on her way to getting to the other point. Regardless of being caught or not, she lied by saying he was just an old friend. He did the right thing, it's his apartment and he had a right to kick the guy out. Once trust is broken, it's very very hard to get it back. He dodged a bullet.
@@celestialmaiden4606you hit the nail on the head there. The only (and i do mean only) way that someone can/should maintain a relationship with an ex is if they are family friends and they have to "play nice" so that drama isn't sturred up when there are gatherings. And even then scrutiny is still prudent. so at the end of the day for me the Giant blood-red flag waving about the room is that she is that frendly with an ex.
@@Michael_800honestly this is very insightful and it certainly gives me an alternate perspective to look at this from. One of the things that sticks out to me that I just can't get over about this story is that things in it happened lightning fast. 2.5 years, ruined by a bad decision, into a failed dialogue, and some (while very wise) off-the-cuff advice.
@celestialmaiden4606 but she isn't necessarily cheating emotionally. She was being there for a friend. If he hadn't come home while he was still there we don't know how things would have gone.
Pops is really wise. OP is very lucky to have that kind of support from his parents. Imo Lily deserved it, trust is the foundation of an relationship and breaking that trust means the whole relationship crumbling into pieces. She has to carry the weight of her own actions, end of discussion.
While I wouldn't say she deserved it, I would still say that those are the consequences of her actions. Whether she was doing something behind his back, or just simply not wanting her boyfriend to be mean to her friend (and being naive enough to believe that that friend being an ex wouldn't matter), her action and the consequences it had cannot be taken back. That's just the way it is. I still hope that both of them can better themselves from this experience and live healthier lives.
@@noobslayer6915 as a woman myself I would never invite an ex over. That's just so disrespectful, although it might seem mean or such, I don't care if he's sad or been going through a tough time, there is a reason for our break up. I feel that an encounter with an ex can lead to nothing good, Lily should have backed up her boyfriend. I hope that they can both live the rest of their lives happy and content aswell.
@@noobslayer6915he was cocky in op house for a reason, and there is a reason she went after him, and protected him while shitting into someone's heart. She was silent when he said "reminiscing about old times" because she knew that op knew what it meant. Then when Kyle had his entertainment for a night she realized how she fucked up, after op not picking the phone
@@noobslayer6915 Yeah, father's analysis is to be taken with salt of grain. In reality the girl was completely lost in that situation, it hardly means that she took her ex's side and came to his defense, although it may appear so. But whatever the case, the damage is done. OP is already disrespected and his feelings changed.
The father might have overanalysed it but he wasn't completely in the wrong. Notice how the gf did not even once counter the ex for his cocky mannerism to the op. I want to give the gf a benefit of doubt,but a girl can't stand getting her bf being mistreated that too in his own damn house. She could have corrected the ex in a stern way right from when he introduced himself to the op. @@arhael3594
I can fully see how nothing was intended to happen and she was just too shy to tell him it was her ex, and then realized how she messed up. And that she did, of course she should have told him that before.
The guy clearly had some plans for her. Why does a guy seek out his ex anyway? Sounds like he broke up with someone himself and went out looking for a replacement. Either she's incredibly naive or she's just acting dumb, so she wouldn't have to take any responsibility for starting to go down a path with an obvious outcome. Plausible deniability.
Correct choice because let’s be honest even if there wasn’t anything going on and she was being truthful, she broke his trust the moment she didn’t tell him it was her ex and took her ex’s side. The relationship maybe could’ve been salvaged if she took his side but the moment she didn’t all trust is gone and no matter how much he and her love each other the relationship would have broken apart. Also Pops is the man and a legend spitting words of wisdom and helping his son laugh.
Even IF they didn't have sex and she didn't cheated on him physically -She invited her ex into HIS house behind his back -Said ex was very disrespectfull towards OP and she only interveened before OP gets violent -She then got angry at OP for how he reacted -She left the appartment right after blowing out on OP she probably cheated but even if she didn't, she showed enough disrespect to end the relationship.
@@yozarahirvi4750At the very least it’s emotional cheating even if they didn’t do anything physically. What she was doing was definitely walking the line and possibly considering it
@@peterhen7050Yeah that would have been another deal breaker for me, she wouldnt stay to sort things with her BF but had hours of her time to sort things with her Ex before that. Once she stepped out, he doesn't know where she went...but she created that on her own.
The disrespect from the ex “do you want me to leave the house that you don’t own while the owner is telling me to leave 🥺” and the fact where when he was asked politely the first time he just made an excuse and didn’t take the hint.
Those lyrics he said in the story really sealed the deal. Love is is easy, you don’t have to put effort in it and even if you love those people you can still betray them. Now loyalty is hard cause it’s about actions, no matter if you like em or not you still have to have their back and be there for them. She along with a lot of cheaters seem to show the love aspect but they always prove they aren’t loyal.
yes totally. There’s a therapist on youtube who believes love is an act not a feeling, you can say you love someone all you want but if that’s all you do, what does it mean? but he SHOWS his love to his wife by cleaning the kitchen for her, being a father to their kids, helping with problems etc.
@@kirreiYeah, but that's the thing about something like "love".....everyone interprets it their own way....even though I'd still say that the basics of love are universal.
Loyalty is a concept that many ppl struggle with. Its easy to stay loyal when everything is going great and nothing troubles you. Only when you face consequences choosing loyalty can you prove that you are truly loyal.
Like the dad said, where do you think she is now? Like yeah, after following the ex out she probably stayed the night with him and after that things might not have been as rosy as she thought it would be or she realized she had made a big mistake so she wanted to try and salvage her relationship with OP only for him to kick her ass out. Good for him, self respect is one of the most important things a person can own in life. The dad is a good one.
If they were already unfaithful and could meet at the ex's place so easily, why go through the trouble of meeting at OPs place and basically making sure they are discovered? Makes no sense. The whole story is full of assumptions. Not saying he shouldn't break up but he knows nothing about what happened before or after, he just takes his dads word for it.
@@Michael_800 You make a good point, however, I counter with this. Why would you stay with someone who has proven to be more loyal to an ex than to you. She may very well have not cheated but to put someone else ahead of her bf in his own home shows her feelings for the ex exceeded her loyalty and respect towards her bf. Therefore, like the dad said, where do you think she is now?
@@valerixcrim3716 How has she proven that, though? The only thing, other than her saying "old friend" instead of Ex I could find was, when OP initially asks to end it here, the Ex said "but we are still talking" and her apparently not looking at OP and I guess not immediately saying "if he says end it here, let's go". Every other thing, like them sitting on opposite sides of the couch, but looking at each other talking (how else do you talk?), her jumping when he comes in (just surprised, lotta girls are jumpy), them "making no effort to continue their conversation", like dude wants to be ignored when he just came home? None of these things are suspicious per se, unless you want to view them that way. Maybe she really is the dumbest cheater in the world. But If you give her the smallest benefit of the doubt it sounds like just a misunderstanding/douchy ex trying to be tough and it all landed on her because she didn't say it was her ex. Really not trying to white knight here, but with how this all snowballed into him dumping her the very next day without ever hearing her side of things, maybe she had a good reason to not introduce him as an ex, but rather an old friend, which is probably also true. That being said, she still should've at least said "an old friend I had a thing with long ago" just to avoid situations like this.
Anyone that has sympathy for the girl. The Ex was told this wasn't her apartment and he still has the balls to ask the girl who doesn't live there if she wants him to leave. If he was actually scared that Op was gonna beat her or something he would have escorted her out no he left and probably waited for her because he expected her to come. Even if they didn't sleep together or did anything Ex still knows he has influence despite not dating because Lily obviously gives him that idea that Ex is as or more important than Op.
I really don't get how him saying that reflects on her. Could he not be an insecure douche, trying to make himself look cool? Like he wants to get back together and only pretended he had something to get off his chest? No guy at that age is postering without a "female" egging him on? Or just a comment, that OP took wrong and is now relaying in a different way, considering he blew up right after it was said? Not saying she def doesn't cheat, but there's a lot of jumping to conclusions going on here.
@@Michael_800 the guy is likely insecure he is 5'9 wearing tim which the dad jokes about them giving him a height lift so he looks taller. he is shorter, lighter, and likely less muscular. She doesn't have to have told him anything but how she acted can still give him the confidence to be like that and I'm sorry if you have a partner that can nonverbally encourage people to be disrespectful in your space something is going on I don't care who you are.
@@BaeBunni Does that mean you are submissive to everyone that's an inch taller than you because you fear being beat up? What happened to smaller guys being assholes to compensate? I think you are reading way more into this situation. Maybe she "nonverbally encouraged" him. Totally possible. But maybe they are also just immature college kids. One of them tried to be all suave in front of his ex and it all escalated from there. Just gives off some pickup artist, everyone is playing mind games vibe. In the real world there are misunderstandings, people put their foot in their mouth and misjudge situations. Girl definitely shouldn't have hidden that he's her ex. But IMO that's the only thing she really did wrong, without doing some mental gymnastics. Could still be enough to end it with her. But I feel like the dude didn't get the best counsel from his dad and reddit. No one played devils advocate and tried to diffuse the situation, so I hope he never realizes that and asks himself if he made a rushed decision.
The fact that she LIED to him about who she was meeting is already a nono for me. Everything after that just made it way way worse. Bringing another man to MY apartment? Staying late night hours talking looking eye to eye WITH YOUR EX? Not even mentioning not getting my back when a cocky SOB try to talk me out on my own home. Just think about it for a second... this woman was a fcking time bomb.
Guarantee she always goes after "tough dudes" then complains about their behavior towards her. The lack of reaction to his cocky attitude spoke volumes.
And if things went further between them, she'd just say "oh, it just happened." No it didn't ...why do you think your ex sought you out in the first place...
Bro the dad in story was A REAL ONE I swear mf was so woke like I’m glad the op and his dad are just so humble even tho the op’s situation was hard asf ESPECIALLY when his girl might be cheating behind his back. Glad it didn’t end in a fight or something worse just glad he decided to try and leave her behind.
The momment the ex asked her "do you want me to leave?" She had to say something along the lines lf "im sorry, but its his appartment, you need to listen to him". The momment she is not trying to descalate in his bf favor, you know she has something going on, and its not good.
It's wild that she invited her ex over. Like WTH. And as well, when OP said to get out of my house, and the ex is like "lily do you want me to leave". That's weird and wild. Like bich get out of my home. Shout out to the father, he reminds me of my pops.
This is satisfying because it feels like the man got the absolute upper hand on a cheater and held them completely accountable, all before any cheating even happened. You know she regretted her decisions, and she paid for them.
Even if nothing happened between them and it was just a misunderstanding, him feeling nothing afterwards means that it’s over. Even if nobody did anything wrong, the moment either person feels like that the relationship at the very least needs to take an indefinite pause
The way she’s all panicking a a day later sounds like she did I something with the ex and after post nut clarity she realized the shit she has done and now trying to salvage her broken relationship
The ex’s response/reaction to this guy kindly asking him to call it a night tells you all you need to know about the ex’s motives at the very least, and her not immediately siding with her boyfriend is also telling
Regardless of any situation with an ex or whatever, I would have lost it purely at a guy telling me he was still talking or not done when I told him it was time to leave MY house.
She might think that she has ✨ empathy ✨. But if she really, did, she would have seen this coming from miles away. Meeting an ex, while you're already in a relationship really is a hot potato. Nothing good ever comes from it You could argue that the OP is insecure and paranoid for not even hearing his girlfriend out. But OP was apparently more upset at the fact that his girlfriend moved behind his back and didn't take his side. (Especially when she's so hypocritically preventing all members of the opposite sex from approaching him. While happily chatting with her own ex about 'the good times'.
If you’re dating someone and they do this, it means they do not respect you nor the relationship. That is an automatic break-up. Why? Cause you’ll have a problem with it, she will say ‘you’re just jealous’ or ‘being unreasonable’ and in the end of the day the worry will hurt your relationship, she will still not respect you and she will still most likely cheat because thats the path she chose. A real Woman or man would know not to even try and warrant something like this. And a real woman would never fking disrespect their man by bringing another into his house. She belongs to the streets
The moment a man who i told to leave asks my Gf "Do you want me to leave?" that´s it im draggin is ass out, your not ignoring and disrespecting me in my own house like that
First guy I have respect for from these posts. Regardless of if anything happened between them which most likely it did or was gonna at some point. You saw the instant disrespect and red flag and wasn’t willing to take the chance and left the bitch there and then. Either way she crossed the line. Well done man
Complete lack of respect. Ex-boyfriend sounds like a real winner. Don't let the door hit you on the way out. I would've told the girlfriend to leave with her ex, that the relationship is over. Then see how she reacts.
The ex is not a "nice" person, I mean, if this is a real story, the dude basically antagonized the owner of the house to say the least. He's rude af. Lily also has the audacity of 'lying' to OP while asking for permission to use his space. She probably texted him, she could've texted him and be like, my old friend who's also my ex is having a rough time and wanted to have a chat with me. I was wondering if we could use your apartment. But now that I typed that, I'm like...oh lord, that sounds bad, why OP's 'gf' does this to him LOL.
I’m 28 & have gone through this shit countless times. I’ve completely dropped any long term expectations & literally just f*ck. Finding a woman that actually deserves commitment is damn near impossible now.
@@darkriku12💯 In a society where adultery is not a crime and sex is seen as a mere pleasurable act rather than intimate and special, it should be expected for cheaters to be common, female or male both think cheating as a small thing
She met in his apartmant so he wouldn’t think something was happening, but also didn't say who she was meeting? ... Make it make sense... She planned on fooling around with her ex in that apartment. The ex asking her if she wanted him to leave suggests either: She talks so little about OP, that the Ex sees him as doormat Or..She'd already been sleeping with him and possibly seemed willing to break up right there.
she's out of her mind for disrespecting him like that and possibly cheating on him with such an ex. he'd have no problem finding a girl who'd actually respect him, his home, and their relationship. i mean im a dude but if i was a girl there's no way i'd be so cruel to a dude in his own home.
The fact she couldn’t even look him in the eyes is really suspicious lol. That’s really something she needed to have talk to him about first. It’s not that hard to think something wasn’t happening.
You have to establish boundaries as soon as the relationship starts.I tell her what will make me immediately break up with her and if she has a problem there is the door.
To the streets with she who cheats! Don't worry, as long as you get a good long workout at the gym and stay with your brotherhood throughout, you'll work through the heartbreak and become a better man.
First, the wrong idea is the right idea. Second, she did think about it, she just didn't plan it well Third, she cared more about her ex's feelings than his, it would not surprise me if she didn't make it clear that even though she has a key, it's not legally her apartment. She knew damn well what she was doing, she couldn't wait to get it in with him, she didn't even bother to plan a rendezvous point out of the way. Even if she didn't screw him physically, she's emotionally cheating on him..just as bad. Then she tries to gaslight him by throwing down the empathy card which is a common narcissist tactic. She stormed out, where'd she go? Probably to rage f**k her ex while hedging her bets with him. She screwed him at her boyfriend's place to give herself a thrill and she got it. If he took her back, she would just become a more efficient liar and screw the ex at every opportunity. Good for him calling his Dad to steel his resolve and having the backbone to stand up for himself. Good for him that this didn't after he married her and she pulled paternity fraud on him. She knew damn well what she was doing, her tears didn't work and now he's free, she played herself. Don't think for a moment that she didn't tell her close friends her plan, but they'll probably have her back publicly...they usually do that. You can bet your last dollar that she'll try to come back later. Now she'll always remember him as the one that got away.
Tbh, talking with an ex isn't the bad thing. If you can move past that and just be friends, it shows maturity But the fact that she lied and said an "Old friend" and then brought him into her bf's apartment, is insane
The way she packaged that bullshit speaks volumes. An old friend? THAT'S YOUR FCKING EX! You knew if you said my EX it would've been an obvious no so you packaged it up right B?
The kid is lucky to have a dad like that. Thankfully for him he's still young and never really got established with this chick; he should've dropped her as soon as he realized it was her ex she invited over.
Maybe it's just me, but I don't think she cheated on him. He was 100% right about everything he said and he definitely should have broken up with her. However, I think this is what the ex wanted. I think he cooked up this plot to take her back. He made up some BS about needing a someone to listen, hit her up, chatted with her and convinced her to let him over. He won her over a bit during the conversation enough for her to actually treat him like a friend a bit and stand up for him when asked to leave by her boyfriend. This set the stage for her fight with her boyfriend. He knew they would break up, and guess where she's gonna go now for emotional support because he just used her for emotional support. The ol' switcharoo.
pretty sure that's what happened. tbh tho, it's such a basic move that if you fall for it you're FAR too guillable for any kind of commitmwnt or responsability. Like seriously, there's being an idiot but that goes beyond it...
@@dob_z If you believe that you have been blessed enough to have never met TRULY gullible people. I mean... I once told a 16 y guy who believed our city's sewer were infested with crocodiles (that was in the italian mountain, the only crocodiles there are at the zoo, the climate is far too cold for them to survive). They exist and they are a PAIN to deal with
It doesnt matter if she cheated or not. The whole chain of events shows how untrusty she was. Totally disrespectful in every possible way. Dude, you realize she brought a man that once said "i love you" while fcking her, TO HIS HOUSE? And lied to him about it too? That's the biggest red flag I've ever seen in my life.
The action on its own was scummy, but that alone with some begging and apologizing I could probably consider a second chance. The moment she backed up the other guy then tried to blame you, i don't give a shit what you do it is over.
Literally the one thing I value more than all else is honesty/trustworthiness, just don't lie to me and you can get away with so much. The fact that she knew she needed to say "friend" instead of "ex" is enough for me. That's an intentional cover up that she knew ahead of time she needed to lie about. If you're ever in a tough situation and you want to really show me that "nothing is going on" behind my back, then step 1 should always be "tell the truth", keep me fully in the loop.
I ended my relationship in a similar fashion. Got two promotions, and I'm moving up in the world. Hitting the gym, making a lot of money. Focus on yourself.
Poor guy. Guarantee this Ex was asking to get back together or for sexual relations. She was dishonest and disrespectful to organise this. Disloyal taking the dues side and immature to run out. For all we know she ran out to the Ex and left the BF. Leave her to the streets
God daum OP. Next time please pick a girlfriend who is not emotional dence/immature. Like she talks about empathy but gave you none. How could once accidentally not see how sketch and messed up that is
He's 6 ft, fit, got a job, and his own apartment without roommates AT 22... She lost her mind. He's gonna have a new girl in like 5 minutes if he wants one.
Fax, honestly bro was a keeper and she let him go for her ex who sounds like a prick
Most of these stories are fake, this one seems like one of them. But at least the stories are entertaining.
Most of them are made up with juicy stories to pull your attention and get views
Who gives a crap if they're real or fake. Just take it for what it is....entertainment.
@@yennefer440lol ok
This kid's father's a real man. Told the son exactly what he needed to know regardless it hurt or not. For a 22 year old to have his head screwed on right now a days hid father is right he is rare. His parents raised a good one.
The "everything's happens for a reason" line got me, my mom says that all the time to me when im down
@@korosensei1325this comment got me my mom always says that shit and I’ve never really believed it. 😂
@@eddiesincyr dawg I was the same way till like a year ago, she was onto sumn😭
Chrisdblabla calling a 22 year old a kid. Shocking
@@korosensei1325 I hate this phrase. Anything that happens in this universe, happens for no fucking reason.
I'm 100% confident that she either cheated already or at the very least intended to. That would also explain why she got mad at him for just smiling at another woman. Cheaters tend to project onto their partners.
If she did, she isn't very smart. Cheaters try to hide their affairs, not bring them to their SO's apartment. If it was an actual affair, they would meet at a hotel or his place.
The ex clearly still has feelings for her and probably wanted more. I'm not sure what her thinking was, but I don't blame OP for making the decision he did.
That ex dude being cocky-part was the dead give away for me. I've met some mf that acted like that, merely for the fact, that he had hooked up with a chick that was a friend of mine and was secretly afraid about "competition" while kind of flexing about that without going to the point
@@wsol80no feelings. He just wanted to "lean" om her. And when he got bored dump. No one takes woman who is currently cheating or did before, for gf. She is just his amusement and toy for now. She cried because she understood how she fucked up
@@wsol80 She wasn't just not smart, she was cocky. Thought she could have this emotional affair (and that's what it was, not telling her bf the circumstances of "going back to the good old days when her ex could lean on her in rough times", acting guilty when her bf came home, lying that she wouldn't be upset the other way around, tending to her ex's needs over his) in the comfort of her bf's home, thinking her bf would be staying out longer for dinner. She thought she could fuck around and threw it all away.
Even if she didn't, her shock when he came home showed that she was entertaining the thought about getting back with her ex, which in my books is the same thing as cheating.
Finally. A dude with some self respect. This is refreshing.
facts
What a simp. He considered beating the ex's ass. Why? Always strike your partner first, not the ex.
@@Dionysos_____Alters💀💀bro's 11
@@Dionysos_____Alters Let men be men. That guy needed a punch or two for his attitude. And it doesn't stop you from wacking your gf too, while you are at it.
@@Dionysos_____Alters 🤣
A man with self respect. I remember a male friend of mine about his girlfriend cheating on him and he asked me how can I make this work? I preceded to show him some tough love. I directly quoted Billy from The Boys and told him “Where is your f@cking rage, your self respect”.
Nice
nice
Where's the video of the dog in the mask
As a woman, I'm you with my male friends. They get cheated on and have been thoroughly brainwashed into thinking it's somehow their fault their partners cheated. They come to me asking how win the cheating partner back, and I'm like, baby boy, the first step is going to therapy to realize you deserve better. Most of them had narc moms and spineless/absent dads though.
So...ummm don't get me wrong here but spill the ☕ I'm invested rn
So we all know that the woman not standing up for you in the presence of conflict of another man is a massive red flag, but they way the dad EXPLAINS it makes him the goat and clears up ANY confusion on the matter.
Freaking Mr. Miyagi over here
I'm not saying he came to the wrong conclusion but all those "sure signs" are really not in my opinion. He's 22, so his girl is probably the same or even younger. The way OP explains it, things moved pretty fast and he reacted immediately after the ex asked the girl if she wants him to leave. To expect a 20ish year old to navigate two men playing power games and immediately cutting in when some snarky remark is done is just wild to me. Like every girl has a PhD in Bro all of a sudden.
Not defending her or what came before. But other than not mentioning that the old friend was an ex (def. weird), I really don't see any transgression that couldn't be explained with immaturity or "it all happened so fast". Why even meet at his apartment, when she knows he could come home any second? To cheat? Naw. And if they already cheat, why not meet up the same way they already have been?
Even him not feeling anything for her in that moment could just as well be a sign of him being overwhelmed and emotionally shutting down, since this was less than 24h later, if I read it right.
His decision might be the right one in the end, but how he came there and the advice he was given based on it is pretty questionable, imo.
@@Michael_800 Emotional cheating is a thing and the fact she defended him and stood up for him means she was well on her way to getting to the other point. Regardless of being caught or not, she lied by saying he was just an old friend. He did the right thing, it's his apartment and he had a right to kick the guy out. Once trust is broken, it's very very hard to get it back. He dodged a bullet.
@@celestialmaiden4606you hit the nail on the head there.
The only (and i do mean only) way that someone can/should maintain a relationship with an ex is if they are family friends and they have to "play nice" so that drama isn't sturred up when there are gatherings.
And even then scrutiny is still prudent. so at the end of the day for me the Giant blood-red flag waving about the room is that she is that frendly with an ex.
@@Michael_800honestly this is very insightful and it certainly gives me an alternate perspective to look at this from. One of the things that sticks out to me that I just can't get over about this story is that things in it happened lightning fast.
2.5 years, ruined by a bad decision, into a failed dialogue, and some (while very wise) off-the-cuff advice.
@celestialmaiden4606 but she isn't necessarily cheating emotionally. She was being there for a friend. If he hadn't come home while he was still there we don't know how things would have gone.
Pops is really wise. OP is very lucky to have that kind of support from his parents.
Imo Lily deserved it, trust is the foundation of an relationship and breaking that trust means the whole relationship crumbling into pieces.
She has to carry the weight of her own actions, end of discussion.
While I wouldn't say she deserved it, I would still say that those are the consequences of her actions.
Whether she was doing something behind his back, or just simply not wanting her boyfriend to be mean to her friend (and being naive enough to believe that that friend being an ex wouldn't matter), her action and the consequences it had cannot be taken back. That's just the way it is.
I still hope that both of them can better themselves from this experience and live healthier lives.
@@noobslayer6915 as a woman myself I would never invite an ex over.
That's just so disrespectful, although it might seem mean or such, I don't care if he's sad or been going through a tough time, there is a reason for our break up.
I feel that an encounter with an ex can lead to nothing good, Lily should have backed up her boyfriend.
I hope that they can both live the rest of their lives happy and content aswell.
@@noobslayer6915he was cocky in op house for a reason, and there is a reason she went after him, and protected him while shitting into someone's heart. She was silent when he said "reminiscing about old times" because she knew that op knew what it meant. Then when Kyle had his entertainment for a night she realized how she fucked up, after op not picking the phone
@@noobslayer6915
Yeah, father's analysis is to be taken with salt of grain. In reality the girl was completely lost in that situation, it hardly means that she took her ex's side and came to his defense, although it may appear so.
But whatever the case, the damage is done. OP is already disrespected and his feelings changed.
The father might have overanalysed it but he wasn't completely in the wrong. Notice how the gf did not even once counter the ex for his cocky mannerism to the op. I want to give the gf a benefit of doubt,but a girl can't stand getting her bf being mistreated that too in his own damn house.
She could have corrected the ex in a stern way right from when he introduced himself to the op.
@@arhael3594
The “Where do you think she’s at right now” line punched me in the gut.
with the way she was reacting, despite saying nothing happened, she clearly felt more guilt than "nothing" would imply.
how she act implies at least she was not against something more could happen this evening
I can fully see how nothing was intended to happen and she was just too shy to tell him it was her ex, and then realized how she messed up. And that she did, of course she should have told him that before.
“Lily do you want me to leave?”
Boyyyyyyyy infuriating
I woulda went berserk
The guy clearly had some plans for her. Why does a guy seek out his ex anyway? Sounds like he broke up with someone himself and went out looking for a replacement.
Either she's incredibly naive or she's just acting dumb, so she wouldn't have to take any responsibility for starting to go down a path with an obvious outcome. Plausible deniability.
Correct choice because let’s be honest even if there wasn’t anything going on and she was being truthful, she broke his trust the moment she didn’t tell him it was her ex and took her ex’s side. The relationship maybe could’ve been salvaged if she took his side but the moment she didn’t all trust is gone and no matter how much he and her love each other the relationship would have broken apart. Also Pops is the man and a legend spitting words of wisdom and helping his son laugh.
Even IF they didn't have sex and she didn't cheated on him physically
-She invited her ex into HIS house behind his back
-Said ex was very disrespectfull towards OP and she only interveened before OP gets violent
-She then got angry at OP for how he reacted
-She left the appartment right after blowing out on OP
she probably cheated but even if she didn't, she showed enough disrespect to end the relationship.
@@yozarahirvi4750Agreed
@@yozarahirvi4750At the very least it’s emotional cheating even if they didn’t do anything physically. What she was doing was definitely walking the line and possibly considering it
@@SillyRamenI wonder where she went when she left? I'm sure nothing happened before, not so sure it didn't happen after.
@@peterhen7050Yeah that would have been another deal breaker for me, she wouldnt stay to sort things with her BF but had hours of her time to sort things with her Ex before that.
Once she stepped out, he doesn't know where she went...but she created that on her own.
The disrespect from the ex “do you want me to leave the house that you don’t own while the owner is telling me to leave 🥺” and the fact where when he was asked politely the first time he just made an excuse and didn’t take the hint.
Lol. Girl seriously thought that she could get away with that bullshit. 😂
The raw disrespect is just astounding. What the hell was she even planning to do?
His dad gave me the advice i never known i needed. Thanks op dad
Those lyrics he said in the story really sealed the deal. Love is is easy, you don’t have to put effort in it and even if you love those people you can still betray them. Now loyalty is hard cause it’s about actions, no matter if you like em or not you still have to have their back and be there for them. She along with a lot of cheaters seem to show the love aspect but they always prove they aren’t loyal.
yes totally. There’s a therapist on youtube who believes love is an act not a feeling, you can say you love someone all you want but if that’s all you do, what does it mean? but he SHOWS his love to his wife by cleaning the kitchen for her, being a father to their kids, helping with problems etc.
@@kirreiYeah, but that's the thing about something like "love".....everyone interprets it their own way....even though I'd still say that the basics of love are universal.
Loyalty is a concept that many ppl struggle with. Its easy to stay loyal when everything is going great and nothing troubles you.
Only when you face consequences choosing loyalty can you prove that you are truly loyal.
As soon as he said he felt indifferent, i knew that was over. The opposite to love isn't hate, its feeling absolutely nothing for thr person.
Like the dad said, where do you think she is now? Like yeah, after following the ex out she probably stayed the night with him and after that things might not have been as rosy as she thought it would be or she realized she had made a big mistake so she wanted to try and salvage her relationship with OP only for him to kick her ass out. Good for him, self respect is one of the most important things a person can own in life. The dad is a good one.
If they were already unfaithful and could meet at the ex's place so easily, why go through the trouble of meeting at OPs place and basically making sure they are discovered? Makes no sense. The whole story is full of assumptions. Not saying he shouldn't break up but he knows nothing about what happened before or after, he just takes his dads word for it.
@@Michael_800 You make a good point, however, I counter with this. Why would you stay with someone who has proven to be more loyal to an ex than to you. She may very well have not cheated but to put someone else ahead of her bf in his own home shows her feelings for the ex exceeded her loyalty and respect towards her bf. Therefore, like the dad said, where do you think she is now?
@@valerixcrim3716 How has she proven that, though? The only thing, other than her saying "old friend" instead of Ex I could find was, when OP initially asks to end it here, the Ex said "but we are still talking" and her apparently not looking at OP and I guess not immediately saying "if he says end it here, let's go". Every other thing, like them sitting on opposite sides of the couch, but looking at each other talking (how else do you talk?), her jumping when he comes in (just surprised, lotta girls are jumpy), them "making no effort to continue their conversation", like dude wants to be ignored when he just came home? None of these things are suspicious per se, unless you want to view them that way.
Maybe she really is the dumbest cheater in the world. But If you give her the smallest benefit of the doubt it sounds like just a misunderstanding/douchy ex trying to be tough and it all landed on her because she didn't say it was her ex.
Really not trying to white knight here, but with how this all snowballed into him dumping her the very next day without ever hearing her side of things, maybe she had a good reason to not introduce him as an ex, but rather an old friend, which is probably also true. That being said, she still should've at least said "an old friend I had a thing with long ago" just to avoid situations like this.
@@Michael_800come on lily, we know its you
@@Michael_800even if she has no intention of cheating. She is too naive to be in a relationship with. Good riddance.
The fact she told him she wouldn’t talk to him again is the most damning thing to me lol
Like if nothing happened why does she feel so guilty
Anyone that has sympathy for the girl. The Ex was told this wasn't her apartment and he still has the balls to ask the girl who doesn't live there if she wants him to leave. If he was actually scared that Op was gonna beat her or something he would have escorted her out no he left and probably waited for her because he expected her to come. Even if they didn't sleep together or did anything Ex still knows he has influence despite not dating because Lily obviously gives him that idea that Ex is as or more important than Op.
I really don't get how him saying that reflects on her. Could he not be an insecure douche, trying to make himself look cool? Like he wants to get back together and only pretended he had something to get off his chest? No guy at that age is postering without a "female" egging him on? Or just a comment, that OP took wrong and is now relaying in a different way, considering he blew up right after it was said?
Not saying she def doesn't cheat, but there's a lot of jumping to conclusions going on here.
@@Michael_800 the guy is likely insecure he is 5'9 wearing tim which the dad jokes about them giving him a height lift so he looks taller. he is shorter, lighter, and likely less muscular. She doesn't have to have told him anything but how she acted can still give him the confidence to be like that and I'm sorry if you have a partner that can nonverbally encourage people to be disrespectful in your space something is going on I don't care who you are.
@@BaeBunni Does that mean you are submissive to everyone that's an inch taller than you because you fear being beat up? What happened to smaller guys being assholes to compensate?
I think you are reading way more into this situation. Maybe she "nonverbally encouraged" him. Totally possible. But maybe they are also just immature college kids. One of them tried to be all suave in front of his ex and it all escalated from there.
Just gives off some pickup artist, everyone is playing mind games vibe. In the real world there are misunderstandings, people put their foot in their mouth and misjudge situations.
Girl definitely shouldn't have hidden that he's her ex. But IMO that's the only thing she really did wrong, without doing some mental gymnastics.
Could still be enough to end it with her. But I feel like the dude didn't get the best counsel from his dad and reddit. No one played devils advocate and tried to diffuse the situation, so I hope he never realizes that and asks himself if he made a rushed decision.
@@Michael_800he didn’t make a rush decision lmao
You can’t lie to your bf about inviting your ex in HIS house and let your ex disrespect him and take your ex back and get mad at your bf
Expectation: "You treat others how you want to be treated!"
Reality: You treat others how they treat you.
Indeed. As the saying goes "What goes around comes around"
Pops is a real OG, he raised his son right
The fact that she LIED to him about who she was meeting is already a nono for me. Everything after that just made it way way worse. Bringing another man to MY apartment? Staying late night hours talking looking eye to eye WITH YOUR EX? Not even mentioning not getting my back when a cocky SOB try to talk me out on my own home. Just think about it for a second... this woman was a fcking time bomb.
Guarantee she always goes after "tough dudes" then complains about their behavior towards her. The lack of reaction to his cocky attitude spoke volumes.
And if things went further between them, she'd just say "oh, it just happened." No it didn't ...why do you think your ex sought you out in the first place...
that dad sounds amazing, and knew exactly what to do in the situation
Bro the dad in story was A REAL ONE I swear mf was so woke like I’m glad the op and his dad are just so humble even tho the op’s situation was hard asf ESPECIALLY when his girl might be cheating behind his back.
Glad it didn’t end in a fight or something worse just glad he decided to try and leave her behind.
That "woke" word triggers me and I dont know why :D
The momment the ex asked her "do you want me to leave?" She had to say something along the lines lf "im sorry, but its his appartment, you need to listen to him".
The momment she is not trying to descalate in his bf favor, you know she has something going on, and its not good.
W dad and 304 lily. She belongs to the streets.
It's wild that she invited her ex over. Like WTH. And as well, when OP said to get out of my house, and the ex is like "lily do you want me to leave". That's weird and wild. Like bich get out of my home. Shout out to the father, he reminds me of my pops.
This dude seems so chill. I wanna be his friend.
This is satisfying because it feels like the man got the absolute upper hand on a cheater and held them completely accountable, all before any cheating even happened. You know she regretted her decisions, and she paid for them.
Even if nothing happened between them and it was just a misunderstanding, him feeling nothing afterwards means that it’s over. Even if nobody did anything wrong, the moment either person feels like that the relationship at the very least needs to take an indefinite pause
Might be the single most mature take on a relationship I've seen on reddit in a long ass while
OP dad did a solid and handed him everything he needs, simple and clean.... His gf was Gaslighting him so much... Like i hav empathy.. my aaaaassss.
I personally love the call, dad and the Bulls he was watching. Dad just knew his son called to talk about the game first lol
Dude, props to your pops. Seems like a great guy.
Loyalty over love, RESPECT BROTHER 🔥🔥🔥 what’s the point of love if they’re isn’t any loyalty
That dad is absolutely goated, what a legend
She thinks BF is a chump. Kick her to the curb.
The way she’s all panicking a a day later sounds like she did I something with the ex and after post nut clarity she realized the shit she has done and now trying to salvage her broken relationship
If your girlfriend invites her midget ex in your own appartment, and takes his side, then she has no respect for you.
Well that’s very sad. Pop’s has some real wisdom tho.
Nice to see "My name" has some self-respect.
You did the right thing pal, you'll find someone better than lilly, trust
The ex’s response/reaction to this guy kindly asking him to call it a night tells you all you need to know about the ex’s motives at the very least, and her not immediately siding with her boyfriend is also telling
Regardless of any situation with an ex or whatever, I would have lost it purely at a guy telling me he was still talking or not done when I told him it was time to leave MY house.
She might think that she has ✨ empathy ✨.
But if she really, did, she would have seen this coming from miles away.
Meeting an ex, while you're already in a relationship really is a hot potato. Nothing good ever comes from it
You could argue that the OP is insecure and paranoid for not even hearing his girlfriend out.
But OP was apparently more upset at the fact that his girlfriend moved behind his back and didn't take his side.
(Especially when she's so hypocritically preventing all members of the opposite sex from approaching him. While happily chatting with her own ex about 'the good times'.
You got the whole point. Great empathy, storming off your boyfriend while he is being disrespected.
The comment about woman care for someone they want them out of harms way, so true
Is it just me or he got one of the best dad's out there?
If you’re dating someone and they do this, it means they do not respect you nor the relationship. That is an automatic break-up. Why? Cause you’ll have a problem with it, she will say ‘you’re just jealous’ or ‘being unreasonable’ and in the end of the day the worry will hurt your relationship, she will still not respect you and she will still most likely cheat because thats the path she chose. A real Woman or man would know not to even try and warrant something like this. And a real woman would never fking disrespect their man by bringing another into his house. She belongs to the streets
The moment a man who i told to leave asks my Gf "Do you want me to leave?" that´s it im draggin is ass out, your not ignoring and disrespecting me in my own house like that
First guy I have respect for from these posts. Regardless of if anything happened between them which most likely it did or was gonna at some point. You saw the instant disrespect and red flag and wasn’t willing to take the chance and left the bitch there and then. Either way she crossed the line. Well done man
"Old Friend", lol. They definitely smashed as well. She knew what she was doing when she invited that man over.
"I seen it already" was a joke at the start.
But Pop's advice shows that he really has seen it already.
Complete lack of respect. Ex-boyfriend sounds like a real winner. Don't let the door hit you on the way out. I would've told the girlfriend to leave with her ex, that the relationship is over. Then see how she reacts.
The ex is not a "nice" person, I mean, if this is a real story, the dude basically antagonized the owner of the house to say the least. He's rude af. Lily also has the audacity of 'lying' to OP while asking for permission to use his space. She probably texted him, she could've texted him and be like, my old friend who's also my ex is having a rough time and wanted to have a chat with me. I was wondering if we could use your apartment. But now that I typed that, I'm like...oh lord, that sounds bad, why OP's 'gf' does this to him LOL.
I’m 28 & have gone through this shit countless times. I’ve completely dropped any long term expectations & literally just f*ck. Finding a woman that actually deserves commitment is damn near impossible now.
This is wild, some of these sound AI generated but some sound real. Hearing that people go through this multiple times is a trip.
The fish you catch does depend on the fishing spots
@@darkriku12💯 In a society where adultery is not a crime and sex is seen as a mere pleasurable act rather than intimate and special, it should be expected for cheaters to be common, female or male both think cheating as a small thing
She met in his apartmant so he wouldn’t think something was happening, but also didn't say who she was meeting?
...
Make it make sense...
She planned on fooling around with her ex in that apartment. The ex asking her if she wanted him to leave suggests either:
She talks so little about OP, that the Ex sees him as doormat
Or..She'd already been sleeping with him and possibly seemed willing to break up right there.
I wish I had a relationship with my dad like this guy has with his dad
she's out of her mind for disrespecting him like that and possibly cheating on him with such an ex. he'd have no problem finding a girl who'd actually respect him, his home, and their relationship. i mean im a dude but if i was a girl there's no way i'd be so cruel to a dude in his own home.
The fact she couldn’t even look him in the eyes is really suspicious lol.
That’s really something she needed to have talk to him about first. It’s not that hard to think something wasn’t happening.
His dad is a GOAT.
Reminds me how much I miss my dad.
You have to establish boundaries as soon as the relationship starts.I tell her what will make me immediately break up with her and if she has a problem there is the door.
To the streets with she who cheats!
Don't worry, as long as you get a good long workout at the gym and stay with your brotherhood throughout, you'll work through the heartbreak and become a better man.
First, the wrong idea is the right idea.
Second, she did think about it, she just didn't plan it well
Third, she cared more about her ex's feelings than his, it would not surprise me if she didn't make it clear that even though she has a key, it's not legally her apartment.
She knew damn well what she was doing, she couldn't wait to get it in with him, she didn't even bother to plan a rendezvous point out of the way.
Even if she didn't screw him physically, she's emotionally cheating on him..just as bad.
Then she tries to gaslight him by throwing down the empathy card which is a common narcissist tactic.
She stormed out, where'd she go? Probably to rage f**k her ex while hedging her bets with him.
She screwed him at her boyfriend's place to give herself a thrill and she got it.
If he took her back, she would just become a more efficient liar and screw the ex at every opportunity.
Good for him calling his Dad to steel his resolve and having the backbone to stand up for himself.
Good for him that this didn't after he married her and she pulled paternity fraud on him.
She knew damn well what she was doing, her tears didn't work and now he's free, she played herself.
Don't think for a moment that she didn't tell her close friends her plan, but they'll probably have her back publicly...they usually do that.
You can bet your last dollar that she'll try to come back later.
Now she'll always remember him as the one that got away.
She hid the fact that she invited over her ex. I would have done the same thing
I'm expcting lily to be comforted now by that cocky bloke and that will not even surprise me if it really did happen.
Tbh, talking with an ex isn't the bad thing. If you can move past that and just be friends, it shows maturity
But the fact that she lied and said an "Old friend" and then brought him into her bf's apartment, is insane
She was never your girl, it was just your turn.
That father is a real man.
His dad is awesome 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
She belongs to the streets- starting a new chapter is the best thing for you.
The way she packaged that bullshit speaks volumes. An old friend? THAT'S YOUR FCKING EX! You knew if you said my EX it would've been an obvious no so you packaged it up right B?
The nerve of her to bring her ex into his apartment then allow him to disrespect him like that.
The council of 5'9ers do not claim this man.
The kid is lucky to have a dad like that. Thankfully for him he's still young and never really got established with this chick; he should've dropped her as soon as he realized it was her ex she invited over.
W boyfriend moment. Also he has an amazing dad, that's rare
Who tf would ever think it’s a good idea to bring their ex into their new bf/gf apartment when they’re not home? Like are you stupid?
Maybe it's just me, but I don't think she cheated on him. He was 100% right about everything he said and he definitely should have broken up with her. However, I think this is what the ex wanted. I think he cooked up this plot to take her back. He made up some BS about needing a someone to listen, hit her up, chatted with her and convinced her to let him over. He won her over a bit during the conversation enough for her to actually treat him like a friend a bit and stand up for him when asked to leave by her boyfriend. This set the stage for her fight with her boyfriend. He knew they would break up, and guess where she's gonna go now for emotional support because he just used her for emotional support. The ol' switcharoo.
pretty sure that's what happened.
tbh tho, it's such a basic move that if you fall for it you're FAR too guillable for any kind of commitmwnt or responsability. Like seriously, there's being an idiot but that goes beyond it...
@Sethoshini95 there's no such this a gullible people, only very manipulative people who can fool just about anyone.
@@dob_z If you believe that you have been blessed enough to have never met TRULY gullible people. I mean... I once told a 16 y guy who believed our city's sewer were infested with crocodiles (that was in the italian mountain, the only crocodiles there are at the zoo, the climate is far too cold for them to survive).
They exist and they are a PAIN to deal with
It doesnt matter if she cheated or not. The whole chain of events shows how untrusty she was. Totally disrespectful in every possible way. Dude, you realize she brought a man that once said "i love you" while fcking her, TO HIS HOUSE? And lied to him about it too? That's the biggest red flag I've ever seen in my life.
@@henriksti2 Totally agree with you. Just saying there was some manipulation going on there too.
The action on its own was scummy, but that alone with some begging and apologizing I could probably consider a second chance. The moment she backed up the other guy then tried to blame you, i don't give a shit what you do it is over.
Ye major red flag.
Literally the one thing I value more than all else is honesty/trustworthiness, just don't lie to me and you can get away with so much. The fact that she knew she needed to say "friend" instead of "ex" is enough for me. That's an intentional cover up that she knew ahead of time she needed to lie about.
If you're ever in a tough situation and you want to really show me that "nothing is going on" behind my back, then step 1 should always be "tell the truth", keep me fully in the loop.
Why did they fall silent. Why did the ex act cocky. Why the ex ask her if it isn't even her apt. Why didn't she back him up. That's fucking wack.
Ngl but the start sounds like red flags against op. It sounds like she's not allowed to be alone with male friends.
Bro the dad radiated gigachad energy
That 21 savage song lyrics tho 😂🔥
OP : Knock knock
Me : Who’s there?
OP's dad is a real one
chad dad, so much wisdom
OP and his dad are solid men.
Even if lily ended things well with her EX but spending time alone with them while having a boyfriend,wtf
“Where do you think she’s at right now?0
That is a good story!!
The MVP of this story OP's dad .
This dad is the GOAT!
Anyone else thinking of the song "say my name, say my name, say baby i love you..🤣
I ended my relationship in a similar fashion. Got two promotions, and I'm moving up in the world. Hitting the gym, making a lot of money. Focus on yourself.
Aight his dad's comment about the boots made me chuckle 😂
Salute to your father man, he is absolutely right. He is wise
Everytime a drink when the narrator says "My Name" 😂😂😂
right after this shit went down he should have called his pops again. Not just to talk but just to have the feeling that you are not alone
Poor guy. Guarantee this Ex was asking to get back together or for sexual relations.
She was dishonest and disrespectful to organise this. Disloyal taking the dues side and immature to run out. For all we know she ran out to the Ex and left the BF.
Leave her to the streets
God daum OP. Next time please pick a girlfriend who is not emotional dence/immature. Like she talks about empathy but gave you none. How could once accidentally not see how sketch and messed up that is