What I've Learned from Four Years off Alcohol

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  • Опубликовано: 19 июн 2024
  • Follow Up Video - • How to Rewrite Your St...
    Today I am celebrating my 4th year off alcohol which I believe is my greatest achievement to date. Every year I mark today with a dinner with family and friends but this year I am unable to do that.
    This year I wanted to make a video talking through some of the things I’ve learned, the changes that have happened in my life and some of the struggles I have faced (& still do face) throughout this process.
    Giving up booze isn’t easy but I can confirm it is definitely worth it.
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Комментарии • 246

  • @pat53chris54
    @pat53chris54 3 года назад +250

    Matthew your mum and I are very proud of you and all your achievements , we love you so much well done . Dad xx

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +23

      Thanks dad :)

    • @chiefchimp4377
      @chiefchimp4377 3 года назад +8

      @MGTOW WISDOM keep pushing. You can do it. All the best

    • @Trivico
      @Trivico 3 года назад +3

      @MGTOW WISDOM
      How are you doing?
      Feel free to reach out if you need support.
      Wish you all the best 🙏

    • @janeclose1431
      @janeclose1431 3 года назад +3

      What a fantastic son you have. You must be so so proud of him! He is a marvel! It is good that he had you for the strong support! J

    • @staceyharvey6329
      @staceyharvey6329 2 года назад +1

      God bless you Matthew, Mum & Dad! I’m the mum of an adult son who has been alcohol free for 2 yrs & I say that every day is the best day having my son healthy 🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻❤️

  • @universalradio6944
    @universalradio6944 2 года назад +24

    21 years sober. Your story is almost a complete copy of my journey. I gave up alcohol, cigarettes and coffee at the same time, man, it was hell.
    Back on the coffee now though.
    Biggest shock to me was finding most of my friends were drinking buddies, not really friends. So I had a few years where I was a bit lonely, but it was totally worth it. Now I have proper friends who don't care that I don't drink.
    I also found that as each day went by, and when you first start out you count each day, I didn't want to drink as that would reset my sober counter. After a while I stopped counting days and just got on with my life.
    The benefits to my life have been much better health ( I'm not dead ! ), better sleep,unbelievably better decision making, way more money ,better relationships, more time to do as I please, and I no longer wake up and wonder what did i do last night? And did I mention the money I saved ? Retired at 60 , ride my motorbike, go fishing, lunch with my wife... sober was the best thing I ever did.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  2 года назад +1

      This is great to hear, I have had similar experiences on all levels and I agree it was worth it. Thanks for sharing for others to read.

    • @carleewalman1877
      @carleewalman1877 Год назад +1

      What a great story!!

    • @incremental_failure
      @incremental_failure 8 месяцев назад

      Coffee is beneficial for the liver. It's one of the few addictions that actually have mostly good qualities.

  • @-aussie-
    @-aussie- 3 года назад +20

    Alcohol weakens me as a man.
    Vulnerable Hollow indecisive

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +4

      This is common to so many of us John, you are very fortunate to have that level of self awareness which means you can now make the change. Thank for your comment.

  • @sttonep242
    @sttonep242 3 года назад +27

    I stopped cold turkey. One morning I was just sick of the health problems alcohol gave me. I realized it gave me more problems than benefits

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      I have a similar story! So glad I made the decision, my health has never been better. Congrats on making the decision and thank you for watching and commenting :)

    • @adrianhill407
      @adrianhill407 3 года назад +2

      I’m the same. Now I realise alcohol gave me more problems than just health. Good decision.

    • @ThomasDoubting5
      @ThomasDoubting5 3 года назад +2

      I did that with smoking stupid habits we get into.

  • @missygoldstein12
    @missygoldstein12 3 года назад +20

    at some point i realized that alcohol was the great pretender. It gave me extreme pleasure and euphoria for a few hours, but this would mortgage the entire next day where i'd be listless, depressed as hell, brain fog, total sadness, apathy, inability to do anything...was it worth it? No.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +3

      I agree, it is absolutely not worth it. I think it kept me in some of those states for many year! Thanks for your comment,

    • @missygoldstein12
      @missygoldstein12 3 года назад +3

      @@MatthewToman7 to think some people live their entire lives in this state. This is not a judgement against them. It's just sad.

  • @davidmager300
    @davidmager300 3 года назад +43

    Ive struggled with drinking off and on for years. Like you I started drinking quite young. But I'm a chef by trade, I'm also Irish. So it was simply a part of my life. Quite the intricate part. One day while sobering up in the line. Not the first time. I had an epiphany. Since then I've surrounded myself with people that support my decision and will help hold me accountable. Its been hellisly difficult at times and recently the thoughts of drinking have been creeping back. But im fighting it. Its been seven months.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +2

      Hi David, thanks for watching the video and taking the time to comment. Over the years I have battled with the pull back towards alcohol but thankfully never caved, I have also done want you have done and surround myself with people who support my decision to give up the booze and I think this is key. You are the average of the 5 people you spend most of your time with so you have to be careful. I am on Facebook and Instagram under my own name, if you ever need to have a chat hit me up :) 7 months is a massive achievement so be proud of that. I look forward to connecting with you further.

    • @POLYLIVING
      @POLYLIVING 3 года назад +3

      Great job! I’m a chef/stripper/trucker so I’m sure u can imagine the substance abuse I’m surrounded by. I’m a wellness coach as well. I love feeling good. Alcohol is such a negative deterrent

    • @tomlund4951
      @tomlund4951 3 года назад +1

      You don’t have to do it alone... you find a meeting and read the books and get a sponsor and you can live a life better than you can conceive of at this point... that’s the fact that keeps me coming back ... what a trip !

  • @HInc7647
    @HInc7647 3 года назад +20

    140 Days AF - I landed a job that I really wanted 2 days ago ( after being made redundant in June 2020) - for the first time ever I haven’t had to say yes to a job and it not be everything I want. There is always something that I have always had to sacrifice be it pay, distance or long hours...
    I know at the interview I put my best self forward and I know it is because I am not drinking.
    I feel so awesome and proud of myself right now for getting a job I want in not only in the pandemic which has been horrible for job seekers but having the strength to keep going even when I want to turn to wine because I’m sad.
    Not drinking is the best thing I have done for myself. Xx
    Ps. I’m 33 so seems to be an age for reflection!

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      I am so happy to hear this, this is great news! Yes I can second that it is the best decision I have made in my life also. Congratulations on your success so far, please do keep me updates on your journey and thank you for the support :)

  • @andreicd
    @andreicd 3 года назад +29

    I was drinking moderately on the weekends in the club for like 4 years. When I started getting a bit bloated in the stomach I got a gym membership and stopped that for a while. If you want to get rid of a fatty liver you need to do fasting and get on lemon water or tea. I never thought that drinking moderately on the weekends would be noticeable in time but it is. Clean your body guys, do sports, make a fasting schedule, and get rid of carbs especially sugar.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +3

      Thanks for the advise Andre I appreciate that. I never enjoyed the gym or working out but since I activated my healthier life I can’t go without it. Keep up the good work :)

    • @everyday316
      @everyday316 3 года назад +2

      Thanks for posting. Please can you outline the fasting regime you followed for fatty liver?

    • @andreicd
      @andreicd 3 года назад +5

      @@everyday316 Sure. The idea is to reduce the carbs as much as possible and your eating window has to be 6 hours max a day , ideally 2 or 4 hours. Example: You wake up, skip breakfast, only drink lemon water or tea without sugar ( any carb will raise your insuline and not burn fat ) , at about 5 pm you start eating and finish at around 8 pm max. You cand also do some easy exercise streching, just for overall health. With this regime in maximum 6 months you might even see abs. It's simple biology but we have been brainwashed by the western style of eating with 3 meals a day, if your body dosen't take a brake from eating to lower insuline it can't burn fat.

    • @vanillaghetto
      @vanillaghetto 3 года назад +2

      @@andreicd And I would add that your eating window time should be moved to earlier in the day, if you don't stay up quite late!

  • @adrianhill407
    @adrianhill407 3 года назад +9

    My last drink was 31 December 2019. Did dry January, which I did not expect to achieve, and just never went back to it. Had been thinking for a while that I had developed a dependency and ought to do something about it. I would say that I love drinking but even more, I love not drinking. Must say I saw saw immediate health benefits and over time, all the other benefits you talk about. Was 58 when I packed it in. Started drinking in pubs age 15. Being sober has become something I am quietly rather proud of.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +2

      And you should be, congratulations! I loved it but I am the same as you I love not doing it more. Thanks for the comment Adrian.

    • @leevancleef358
      @leevancleef358 2 года назад +1

      Congrats! Im 57 and on day 18

  • @thel1355
    @thel1355 2 года назад +13

    My Father was an alcoholic and it ruined our family. I decided when I was a child to never drink lest I like it too much. My Dad eventually killed himself with alcohol.
    I do not live an especially healthy lifestyle, but I am conspicuously healthier than most of my peers, and I suspect being a lifetime tee-totaler has a lot to do with it. Never too late to stop poisoning yourself.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  2 года назад +1

      I am sorry to hear that about your dad. I think it’s a good move to avoid completely, I am glad I had the strength to move on and stop completely. Thanks for your comment

    • @thel1355
      @thel1355 2 года назад +2

      @@MatthewToman7 I am introverted and somewhat stubborn by nature, so the social penalties and difficulties of being the only non-drinker in the room were less of a burden for me. For highly social people, it's much harder to do what I did, and I often wonder if it was the right choice on balance. Thanks for the response. I applaud your commitment.
      I tend to be rather open to letting people do what they want with their own bodies, and so I'm tentatively in favor of legalising more recreational drugs than are permitted now. Nonetheless, it's worth reflecting on the fact that if alcoholic drinks were invented today, they'd almost surely be banned or very nearly banned.

  • @kevinmeehan1714
    @kevinmeehan1714 3 года назад +15

    Great video! I'm four months alcohol free now and it's the best decision I've made in life.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      Congratulations Kevin thats great news! Yeah I can agree with you, I also feel it was the best decision I have done in my life. Keep me posted on your journey. :)

  • @jamiegosden2946
    @jamiegosden2946 3 года назад +7

    Hey Matt. I'm the same as you. 1 year ago on the same day , I quit alcohol, cigarettes became a whole foods Plant based vegan.
    Life changing. Dropped 10 kilograms, skin no longer dry, whites of my eyes are whiter but work life same and my business still struggles... but then my priorities at 55 have changed , so financial success isn't what matters in life.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Hi James, good to hear from you and congratulations. What is your business? I do agree your priorities change when you have a clear mind.

  • @LeanneJuliette
    @LeanneJuliette Год назад +2

    This was sooooo powerful thank you!! I've been yo-yoing between stopping drinking and starting back again. I'm not a social drinker - but was drinking more wine at home than was healthy. Mostly from boredom. I have stopped on and off for a about a year now and have finally committed to stopping drinking fully. Thank you for your honesty.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  Год назад

      Thank you for your comment Leanne. Keep me updated on your journey :) good luck with it.

  • @concong4183
    @concong4183 3 года назад +10

    Well done, gasun! I'm on my 23rd day. I managed to stop in 2015 for two years, but then was hit by a personal crisis and started up again after having sworn to never touch it again. I know how my life changed for the better during those two years off it, and I want those days back again. It's more than well-worth it.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      Congrats Con! If you done it before you will do it again :)

    • @concong4183
      @concong4183 3 года назад +1

      @@MatthewToman7 Thanks for the encouragement, Matthew. Happier days ahead.

  • @carolesteinberg7463
    @carolesteinberg7463 3 года назад +10

    My last drink was over 2 years ago. I totally forget about alcohol. I just quit thinking I was taking a month
    Break but I never started again.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      That as the way to do it :) Thanks for watching the video and taking the time to comment.

  • @KlaraMcDonnell
    @KlaraMcDonnell 3 года назад +14

    Congratulations. I drank a lot less the last few years but decided last November to never drink alcohol (or energy drinks again) and I know I won't. This video will help so many people, especially in these hard times.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +2

      Thanks klara. Glad to see you are doing so well, I have been following your journey on instagram xxxx

  • @matti7953
    @matti7953 3 года назад +1

    Extremely well put. Thank you for this.

  • @jayalanchristianson7070
    @jayalanchristianson7070 3 года назад +1

    Beautiful and concur. Thank you for your time and wisdom.

  • @jho3341
    @jho3341 3 года назад +2

    Your an inspiration and speaking nothing less that the TRUTH!!
    I'm in the early stages of my new journey, and just in these 3 months I am noticing a major difference, like life changing difference. Thanks for the video, and the inspiration!

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      Thank you for watching the video and taking the time to comment, I really appreciate it. I do agree, I also seen the results early on. I know you are only at the beginning but I can assure you it only gets better :)

  • @2WheelsForever
    @2WheelsForever 3 года назад +2

    Very proud of you, dude. You seem like a good guy. Thanks for the inspiration. Stay Bad Ass, your genuine goodness of spirit shines through...I can see it.
    Stay cool and stay strong.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      Thank you. I appreciate you taking the time to watch he video and comment on it :) I hope everything is going well where ever in the world you are.

  • @crowley144
    @crowley144 3 года назад +1

    Amazing, this is just the encouragement I needed

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Great to hear Micheal. Keep me posted on your journey what ever that may be. Thanks for watching the video and taking the time to comment :)

  • @elijahdunmore7526
    @elijahdunmore7526 3 года назад +1

    Hi Matthew congratulations on your 4 years of sobriety I have been sober for 1 year and 2 month thanks for sharing Matthew glad you are doing great 🙏

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Congratulations Elijah well done on 1 year and 2 months. Thanks for your message and taking the time to watch the video. :)

  • @tonypmcmahon
    @tonypmcmahon 2 года назад +1

    Fantastic message Matthew ... its true that experience is the best teacher. You have clearly lived it.
    Your experience strength and hope will no doubt help countless others who have alcohol problems . You look just like your Dad at this age... im kinda waiting on you playing a banjo abd bursting into a Gerry Rafferty song.
    I love your parents... they can be proud of you and your journey.
    God Bless keep up the good work
    Tony.☘️🙏

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  2 года назад +1

      Thanks Tony I appreciate the message and the chat today. See you soon

  • @kabinkeen5485
    @kabinkeen5485 3 года назад +1

    Matthew has learned and shared a lot from his extended period of abstinence. He speaks clearly and sincerely about its benefits... I want to be more like him in the way he's winning this battle.
    The Q & A is also tough and informative and his replies are born from experience and adversity.
    Good luck and I'm subscribing so I can listen to this one over and over! Much to learn!

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thank you Kabin for the message I really appreciate it and for taking the time to watch the video.

  • @stephenfermoyle4578
    @stephenfermoyle4578 2 года назад

    YOU ARE THE BEST EXAMPLE FOR US ALL THANK YOU

  • @runningcafe1
    @runningcafe1 3 года назад +3

    Fantastic video mate. I've been off alcohol since October last year and, like you, the quality of my life has improved dramatically. Nice one

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Congrats Craig! Thanks for watching the video and taking the time to comment :)

  • @yagerbomb696969
    @yagerbomb696969 3 года назад +2

    I really enjoyed this video, I’m starting to cut alcohol out of my life. I connected with tour situation almost exactly. Very calm and transparent.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      I am glad this video helped, its the main reason that I videoed it. Thanks for the feedback.

  • @RaphaelaLaurean
    @RaphaelaLaurean 2 года назад +1

    I really enjoyed this. Thank you for sharing your story.

  • @claranally7745
    @claranally7745 3 года назад +8

    Great inspirational video..I was born in the US but at age 12 my Irish parents moved me and my siblings back to Co. Mayo where my father bought a pub. Ps my dad is an alcoholic. At the age of 12 until 15 i was bartending and going to nightclubs..This was 1982..until 1985. Fast forward many years later I'm still drinking excessively and hate myself for it. I have a master's degree as a teacher but I'm not reaching my full potential. I know alcohol is holding me back. Ive always made horrible relationship decisions due to the drink.. Thanks for this video

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      It’s a positive that you recognise this Clara! Once you aware you can then do something about it, thanks for sharing your story and taking the time to watch the video and comment.

    • @sidstovell2177
      @sidstovell2177 Год назад +1

      Hope you got some help.
      Best of luck. July, 2022.

  • @virginiasmith5278
    @virginiasmith5278 3 года назад +1

    Thank you for this!
    The book This Naked Mind has helped me a lot.

    • @Hughbens
      @Hughbens 2 года назад

      Annie Grace?

  • @MrAitraining
    @MrAitraining 3 года назад +8

    Being lonely is a key to my drinking but the sickness is I prefer to be alone. Not a good situation.

    • @chilloften
      @chilloften 3 года назад +1

      Alone=all one. It’s not a bad thing, at all.

    • @janeclose1431
      @janeclose1431 3 года назад +3

      I understand how you feel. It is so difficult being alone in this struggle. Stay strong. J

    • @MrAitraining
      @MrAitraining 3 года назад

      @@janeclose1431 Thank You

  • @HabitsV2
    @HabitsV2 2 года назад +2

    Well done Matthew. Keep it up. I'm on my new journey for many years and, as you say, the best decision I have ever made.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  2 года назад

      Thanks kevin I appreciate the message. Congrats on your journey so far. Thankfully I haven’t looked back. Great videos by the way you are helping a lot of people.

  • @grudeman
    @grudeman 3 года назад +3

    Fantastic video man have a very similar story to yours, only I'm sober 1 year I didn't drink every day or in the morning ect, but emotionally it was really really damaging me. I feel so much happier and as you said I have complete control over my mind it's very liberating. I like you knew for a couple of years before I quit I had a problem and I really wasn't happy doing it. Best of luck with your business and career 👍 god bless

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      Hey dude, thanks for watching and taking the time to comment. Yeah the emotion hit a bit harder with the fear attached :) Congrats on hitting the year mar, I can assure you it’s only gets better from here.

  • @peteypickles3262
    @peteypickles3262 3 года назад +4

    You have a very mature attitude for someone in your 30's. I was not as clear on this issue when I was younger.

  • @hughiegreene2991
    @hughiegreene2991 3 года назад +2

    10 years Dec20, not that the amount of days matters but just to say it’s possible and your life will get better. Respect to you my friend. Best decision I have made.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      Same, best decision also. Everyday it gets better thankfully. Congratulations on your 10 years, that’s an amazing achievement!

  • @mb6194
    @mb6194 3 года назад

    Wow a lot of things you said in this video hit home. Great video, helpful and inspiring ♥

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thanks for watching and for the comment. :)

  • @Turtleportal
    @Turtleportal 7 месяцев назад +1

    7 days sober I feel it already. Can only imagine how it’s going to only get better. One day at a time.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  7 месяцев назад

      Congratulations! May it continue 💪🏼❤️

  • @9210amanda
    @9210amanda 3 года назад +2

    I feel so inspired to quit alcohol completely! Thanks so much

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thank you Amanda for your comment I really appreciate the support

  • @elijahdunmore7526
    @elijahdunmore7526 3 года назад +4

    Hi Matthew glad to hear that you have been alcohol free I love sobriety youtubes I have been alcohol free for 1 year and 2 month I am so happy to be alcohol free thanks for sharing your youtube channel stay safe and enjoy 🙏

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      Hi Elijah thanks so much for the comment and congrats on reaching 1 year 2 months. I love it also and wouldn’t change it for the world :)

    • @elijahdunmore7526
      @elijahdunmore7526 3 года назад

      Thanks 😊

  • @HolisticUni
    @HolisticUni 3 года назад +2

    Great job man!!! Sobriety is the way!!

  • @everyday316
    @everyday316 3 года назад +2

    Well done. Helpful video, thanks for posting

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thank you very much for watching and taking the time to comment. :)

  • @manoucheboysweddingband-n.3527
    @manoucheboysweddingband-n.3527 3 года назад +2

    Brilliant video buddy! Hope you’re well! 🙏

  • @HotRodMarketing
    @HotRodMarketing 2 года назад

    Congratulations brother. I'm recently celebrated 6 years.

  • @cherylr8472
    @cherylr8472 3 года назад +5

    This is so relevant to my life, it effects everything. Motivation, relationships, eating, health, when your (Sober) naturally radatating on a higher level, alcohol can only bring you down, I start each week feeling tired from drinking on a Saturday and then a Sunday eating rubbish, I battle through the next few days catching up on sleep and feeling anxious, vicious circle 🔵 i ordered the book from Allen carr, and im really going to give it my best shot. The biggest thing for me is social aspect everyone I know drinks, and I honestly feel like im missing out when I don't, I can and will do this 🎉

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +3

      I felt like that as well at the start, the fear of missing out but actually I have an even better social life now and I also got my Sunday mornings back :)

    • @benben5847
      @benben5847 Год назад

      Yes, the feeling of missing out is common especially when one starts out on the alcohol free path but you’ve got to think about all that you are missing out on by drinking. All that time recovering from alcohol, loss of physical, mental and emotional energy, free time wasted being hung over, unwanted weight gain, damaged complexion and liver which are related. Looking like crap and often finding oneself running low on money. We miss out more than we gain when drink. Jimmy Carrs book is a good one. Stay strong 💪

  • @terrigelbaum8066
    @terrigelbaum8066 3 года назад +3

    What a turn around in just 4 years.........I wonder what our lives ,as children, would have been like if mother had stopped drinking. I wonder if mother had RUclips if things might have been different for her, for us. Thanks and good job. You look beautiful and look so happy.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      Thank you Terri for this message, I really do appreciate the support. It has been a journey for the past 4 years but I just take one day at a time. I think youtube is a great platform to educate and inspire and grateful we have it. x

  • @StephenCDoherty
    @StephenCDoherty 2 года назад +1

    Great video! I'm always suspicious of alcohol, so to find out 'who is in charge', I made it a personal goal of completing 90 days off alcohol straight through the holidays. I'm at day 52. So far so good!

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  2 года назад

      Nice! Yeah alcohol definitely took charge in my life :) congrats on day 52! Let me know how it went when you reach 90 days. I think you will see results :)

  • @John-cx3nm
    @John-cx3nm Год назад +1

    Thanks for posting bro

  • @blakejohnson8639
    @blakejohnson8639 3 года назад +3

    Thanks for the great video. I recently stopped taking Xanax to sleep after I became addicted to it. It works on the same GABA pathway as alcohol so I believe this needs to be my next step. It sounds overwhelming but I feel like shit every time I drink. Will be an adjustment socially. Thanks for your inspiring words.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Hi Blake, thanks for your message and taking the time to watch the video. I have cut out so many other things as well as alcohol, I also believe they are all connected. I think having a clean healthy lifestyle suits us all best :)

  • @outphoxed91
    @outphoxed91 2 года назад +5

    I'm a bit over 2 weeks sober.. 31 years old.. I tried to get sober for my 30th birthday and I got to almost 200 days... then relapsed because I thought i had it under control... man was I wrong lol Tried doing it alone and failed multiple times. I'm going to AA meetings about twice a week and it's working so far

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  2 года назад +1

      Hey Will great to hear from you. The main thing is you got back on track and AA is the best way in this case :) I tried from my 30th to stop and it took me until 33/34 now I’m 5.5 years off it and the life changes are unbelievable which I’m sure you have started to experience.

    • @sidstovell2177
      @sidstovell2177 Год назад

      A family member told me yesterday that he was celebrating 20 years sober. Got there in the beginning at AA. Good luck!!

  • @xpansionteam1537
    @xpansionteam1537 2 года назад

    Brilliant thanks for this 💙

  • @JLBERRY
    @JLBERRY 3 года назад +3

    We tolerate what we don’t hate.

  • @nedracabral3201
    @nedracabral3201 3 года назад +3

    Thanks for the video, I need to start now. It's just been 2 days...

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Just take one day at a time. Thanks for the comment Nadia.

  • @sleeplessinstockwell
    @sleeplessinstockwell Год назад +1

    Excellent video bro hope all is still going well with you

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  Год назад

      Thank you for the message 🙏🏼 hope all is good with you :)

    • @sleeplessinstockwell
      @sleeplessinstockwell Год назад +1

      @@MatthewToman7 all good, 19 months in

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  Год назад

      @@sleeplessinstockwell amazing! How’s it going for you?

  • @mystars5283
    @mystars5283 3 года назад +1

    Thank you, Matthew :)

  • @gorillagodzilla8138
    @gorillagodzilla8138 3 года назад +1

    How I became the stop drinking expert was firstly I went to rehab and whilst in there getting a bit of time up without using any drugs or alcohol I realised I can actually live life without this crap and a dam good life also. No more hang overs feeling like shit having to apologize to everyone for my behaviour the night before no having to be around people that use abuse lie steal and cheat of you.. Thank God..
    I don't even do meetings because there is too many dickheads in the rooms.. You can do this also don't give up.. Peace Freedom Love..

  • @rogerhugh177
    @rogerhugh177 3 года назад +1

    Sound advice,very good communicator

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thank you, and thanks for the support. :)

  • @biblicalgodisonlytruegod
    @biblicalgodisonlytruegod 3 года назад +4

    A REALLY fun and easy read book is “The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober”. ! ! !

  • @clayryan1196
    @clayryan1196 2 года назад +1

    Hope you get more followers. You have good stuff in your video.

  • @SarahGodfrey1
    @SarahGodfrey1 3 года назад +1

    Amazing video 👏🏼

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thank you Sarah for the support ❤️

  • @AvatarEnd777
    @AvatarEnd777 3 года назад +10

    Imagine a world where we all help each other, like Matthew does, and focus on our real problems, rather than focusing of our different races and allowing us to all be divided by it.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thanks for the comment :) I agree completely.

    • @Mr99RICH99
      @Mr99RICH99 3 года назад +1

      That world would include a REAL medical industry that actually helps people insteading of poisoning them

  • @MrHatapustas
    @MrHatapustas 3 года назад +2

    i gave up at 33 too )) but only 9 months sober atm , dont see that i am coming back to that ! Payed all my debts and credit card , much happier right now ) everyone should try

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      That’s amazing news! I agree, everyone should give it a go.Thank you for taking the time to watch the video and comment :)

  • @mikefixac
    @mikefixac 3 года назад +1

    I was a beer only drinker for most of my life. Not a lot, but still to where it was a problem, especially of course as I look back. Looking back, being sober, it's so easy to see, but when in the morass, I was blind to what my beer drinking was doing to me. For the most part, because it wasn't a big problem, I enjoyed my drinking. But now that I've quit drinking, it's so clear what a waste of time alcohol consumes, and also what it does to our health--that being our liver. Anyone who's been alcohol free, and is truly alcohol free, easily realizes there's no comparison to which life is better--one without alcohol or one with alcohol.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thanks for the comment Michael, yes 100% there is no comparison!

  • @BobBob-uv9fq
    @BobBob-uv9fq 3 года назад +2

    I may have a couple bottles once a week ,but I have them later on in the evening,it means I can’t go anywhere to get more when I m Merry ,I can sit and just enjoy a couple

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      It sounds like to have a healthy relationship with alcohol Bob which is great! Thanks for taking the time to watch the video and for the comment :)

  • @cpkay33
    @cpkay33 3 года назад +1

    glad you touched on the struggles. too many videos avoid this topic and it's a reality.

  • @FastJetPerformance
    @FastJetPerformance 2 года назад +1

    These comments are just a gold mine of knowledge 👍

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  2 года назад +1

      Thanks for taking the time to comment I appreciate it♥️

  • @sarahsmyth5383
    @sarahsmyth5383 3 года назад +3

    Great video I quit and my business has gone from busy to ridiculous over a few months although I'm still craving I know that if i drink even 1 it will be back to black for me.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Hi Sarah, nice to hear form you thanks for watching. I crave it at times as well but the rewards are to great to even tempt me back :) Thanks for watching and the comment.

  • @DAClub-uf3br
    @DAClub-uf3br 8 месяцев назад

    Stopping drinking is the easy step. Recovering is what is hard. I am about 4 years into sobriety and have not found happiness.

  • @DeirdreAnneBarry
    @DeirdreAnneBarry 3 года назад

    Thank you

  • @marksadventures3889
    @marksadventures3889 3 года назад +1

    I'm at 7 years now clean and dry. I spend a lot of time in the fresh air, walking, cycling, camping. I did AA for the first year and then felt i wasn't growing until I left, after all - when you break a limb and it fixes do you keep the plaster on for the rest of your life? No. You move on. I moved on. I stopped because i had to.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      Congratulations Mark! Yeah I feel the same, I wasn’t prepared to wallow in it and just got on with things, it was the best decision I have ever made.

  • @trushatg
    @trushatg 2 года назад +1

    God bless you

  • @keithireland6627
    @keithireland6627 3 года назад +1

    Well done.

  • @alanperez7657
    @alanperez7657 3 года назад +3

    I'm done however I dont think it's going to turn into success neccesarily. We shall see.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Alan that is great to hear, please do keep me updated on your journey.

  • @ThomasDoubting5
    @ThomasDoubting5 3 года назад +5

    You must be the only Irishman in history to go four years without alcohol, jokes aside it's takes one hell of a man to admit to himself he's got problems let alone share it with the world 👍

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +2

      I would imagine I am one of few lol. Thanks for taking the time to watch the video and also comment, I appreciate it :)

  • @markwalsh6714
    @markwalsh6714 Год назад

    Great video Thankyou. I’m off any alcohol for 6 months. I’ve the summer holiday looming in the near future. Where the weathers are hot and the Negronis are flowing. Any tips for a sober 2 weeks ?

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  Год назад +1

      Hey mark thanks for the message. A lot can depend on who you are going with, if they understand the path you are now on it will make it a lot easier. I have been tested on holiday before and thankfully made it through. I am not sure if you have been taking non alcoholic beers but these could really help on a holiday situation. Drink a lot of water and eat desert :) holidays can be tough but once you get through one you will get though many, I now travel full time and find myself in the sun and in holiday mode a lot and it isn’t a bother to me anymore. Let me know how you get on.

    • @markwalsh6714
      @markwalsh6714 Год назад +1

      @@MatthewToman7 great advice thank you. I’m loving guiness o.0 at the moment so it makes it easier. Watch this space !

  • @mapleleafer74
    @mapleleafer74 3 года назад +1

    THANKS FOR THE MESSAGE, A POSITIVE ONE. GOOD THAT YOU'RE NOT IN THE PROPERTY BUSINESS NOW, THAT'S A BUSINESS FOR GREEDY, SELFISH PEOPLE.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thanks for the comment and taking the time to watch the video. Yes I am also glad to be out of that industry :)

  • @benhitt5145
    @benhitt5145 3 года назад +1

    You saying that you had felt of years before that you wanted to quite before you did really struck home with me. I have made a couple of attempts at quitting before. How long did it take you to get past the physical struggles of quitting. I understand that mental may never go away but what about getting past the physical withdraw. I feel like if I had a number like 2 weeks or 1 month or something I could hold out knowing there is a point coming where it is a bit easier

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +2

      I was like you and made a few attempts lasting maybe 2-3 weeks, but the time I officially stopped it was different, as hard as it was I knew I didn’t want to go back! It took me about 2 and a half months before I could hang out with my friends while they were drinking for a few different reasons, I couldn’t fully trust myself and also I couldn’t explain my decision to anyone anymore as no one really understood why I was stopping. All my friends seen my drinking as normal and didn’t really get it, thankfully I got though those few months and here we are. What I would suggest, if you make it one month just try to do another one and see how you feel then, if you do another month check in and see how you feel then. I am pretty sure you will start to feel better and see some results. Once you start to experience the positive results things get easier.

  • @Bossanovawitcha
    @Bossanovawitcha 11 месяцев назад +1

    feels like I am restarting below zero, and having allowed alcohol to take all my resources and health and energy.. feels like there’s no chance of getting it all back - but I know there’s gotta be hope, right

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  11 месяцев назад +1

      You will get it back and then some, I can say that from experience. I started at zero and built my life on my own terms. You can do it also

  • @michaelkrishna_
    @michaelkrishna_ 3 года назад +1

    matt can you help. im 48 and Irish too. i can tell you my story. im on a hari krishna vegan low carb stirct diet and that will save me. but i have to stop the drinking now. i wonder can u help me

  • @feelinsupersonic1606
    @feelinsupersonic1606 3 года назад +1

    Never knew David from corrie was Irish top acting 👏 👍 👌

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      Lol, I will take that as a compliment :)

  • @rigobertotapia8436
    @rigobertotapia8436 Год назад

    I go back and forth on drinking I want to quit right now. But I hate feeling sick I can't stop. I need to work.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  Год назад

      There are many great organisations that can help even over phone or zoom. Have you looked into any of them?

    • @rigobertotapia8436
      @rigobertotapia8436 Год назад

      Their is and people are reaching out to help me. Wife noes I have a problem but I always tell her I will figure it out. I work 10- 12 hours a day but with drinking to just get up and going is not sustainable in the long run I drink like 10 beers a morning and I'm fine at night because my body thinks it can function like that as long as I can fuel it. I'm 34 but if I hit my 40s I noe i won't be able to handle it.

  • @floramcdonald5524
    @floramcdonald5524 3 года назад +3

    I had 3 years off alcohol and I learnt that when I started drinking again I couldn't just have a couple of drinks

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      I am the same, I don’t think it would ever be an option to just have one or two .

    • @Plethorality
      @Plethorality Год назад +1

      @@MatthewToman7 i was a one or two girl.
      I still stopped, cause what was the point? I dont miss it.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  Год назад

      @@Plethorality that’s the thing once you stop you don’t. Takes a minute but you really don’t miss it.

  • @achrafcheraitia4946
    @achrafcheraitia4946 2 года назад +1

    Kudos 👏 I'm working on quit drinking in order to quit smoking. But I don't feel ready to quit drinking definitely. Is it possible to drink sometimes after a long period of abstinence without relapsing? It would really help me if someone with your kind of experience could answer me.
    Thank you a lot

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  2 года назад +2

      For me I would never risk it. Life has been so much better without it and I would never go back. I do think drinking smoking and other stuff all go hand in hand it’s hard for me to do one without the other.

    • @achrafcheraitia4946
      @achrafcheraitia4946 2 года назад

      @@MatthewToman7 I can feel the pleasure and the pride from the place you are. Hope to get there soon.
      Thank you

  • @sevans606
    @sevans606 10 месяцев назад

    I haven't drank alcohol since 17/08/2020. No looking back

  • @shanelennon2697
    @shanelennon2697 3 года назад +1

    ❤️❤️❤️

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thanks Shane, couldn't have done it without you.

  • @garylockhart526
    @garylockhart526 3 года назад

    Don't let your past become your future.

  • @toby7785
    @toby7785 2 года назад +3

    9 days sober today guys ❤

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  2 года назад +1

      Congratulations Toby :)

    • @MsSheilaC
      @MsSheilaC 2 года назад +1

      How are you doing?

    • @toby7785
      @toby7785 2 года назад +3

      @@MsSheilaC 75 days today. Never felt better. Physically and mentally! I am the best version of myself I have ever been.

    • @MsSheilaC
      @MsSheilaC 2 года назад +2

      @@toby7785 thats awesome!!! Keep up the great work

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  2 года назад

      Amazing Toby well done.

  • @johnPaul-qn3dg
    @johnPaul-qn3dg 3 года назад +2

    More money, loads more, I've a healthy bank balance now, alcohol's expenses are not only about the price of a drink or going out, it's about more visits to doctors, missing work and borrowing, I was always borrowing. Also I look a lot better, for a 50yo I'm in great shape and, yes, handsome. You also lose interest in it, during the whole covid crisis I was never tempted once, never even thought about it.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      Thanks great news John. I have lost interest in it also and thankfully no temptation at all. :)

  • @thefunnypigglets9663
    @thefunnypigglets9663 3 года назад +1

    How long does it take to start feeling better

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      For me it took a few months to start to feel better, I was very distracted at the time by my health issues. Within the 1st six months I was able to go back into a pub with my friends without the fear of ordering a drink. I progressively feel better daily to be honest and I think that outlays event going back drinking alcohol. Thanks for your comment I appreciate you taking the time to watch my video.

    • @MrAitraining
      @MrAitraining 3 года назад +1

      The physical threats were never a motivation to stop for me. Most alcoholics don't care. I'm gonna die? great. Sad but true. It's always been mental and spiritual for me.

  • @louislebron8799
    @louislebron8799 2 года назад

    Matthew, Is there any way to send an email directly to you? I would greatly appreciate it. This is very personally and has to do with a family member. I watched your video, and your story resonated with me. I would truly like to help this family member, but I do not know how. Thank you.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  2 года назад

      Hi Louis, thanks for your message. Can you message me on Instagram or Facebook? I am under Matthew Toman on both.

    • @louislebron8799
      @louislebron8799 2 года назад

      @@MatthewToman7 Thank You, I will try

  • @baldersn4474
    @baldersn4474 Год назад +1

    U have to change your life..U cant just put the bottle down and carry on like u did before...Therapy also helps..The drimk is just the bamd aid in my experience..

  • @herosmantle
    @herosmantle 3 года назад +1

    I read this as four years *of* alcohol :D

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Lol, I think I could do doe 20 years of alcohol 😂

  • @trickyrat483
    @trickyrat483 3 года назад +2

    Drink! Drink! Drink!
    Are those my feet?

  • @obbhoy
    @obbhoy 3 года назад +1

    Jus watched this, was deadly, defo makes you think

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thanks for the watch and the comment :)

  • @bernardmiller5347
    @bernardmiller5347 3 года назад +1

    To answer the big question can this be done? You have to want, desire, and have the drive to actually quit. When your young you feel like a super hero and jump on the wagon thinking that you are invincible. Some people just phase out of it as they age. Some people don’t and cirrhosis of the liver is the end result. One of my parents loved Martinis she died of cirrhosis of the liver. Here’s the naked truth Vodka, Whiskey, Gin are the same consistency as Gasoline a man drove a car with vodka in the tank and the car burned the same as if it had gasoline. Imagine what it’s doing to the sensitive internal organs of the body. Ask yourself this is it safe to drink a glass of gasoline? If you obviously say no then when you sit at a bar turn the tables on the liquor. It’s the same so do you need it? Chances are you will walk out. I drank like that for years Eight years ago I backed out of it slowly. I’m happier now then I was then. Don’t get me wrong I have couple beers once a week to flush out my liver. It was twice the size it is now. Parties are a no go.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      Thanks for the comment Bernard, I drank like that for almost 20 years.... I am grateful to be alive.

  • @alexa.9446
    @alexa.9446 3 года назад +4

    The benefits of alcohol are imaginary. In fact alcohol has only downsides. It is often represented as sophisticated and pleasurable but that’s a scam. The career of a drinker always ends the same way.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      I agree.. I did have some good nights out and met some great people, life long friends, but I have also done that sober so I don’t feel like I am missing out on much. Thanks for the comment Mark :)

  • @Wallaby1961
    @Wallaby1961 3 года назад +3

    Think of the money you save😉👍🏻

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад +1

      It has been a lot, I’m not going to lie lol

    • @MrAitraining
      @MrAitraining 3 года назад +1

      That was never a primary reason to stop for me.

    • @Wallaby1961
      @Wallaby1961 3 года назад

      @@MrAitraining me neither but it’s certainly a welcome by product 😉👍🏻

  • @gilbanrith8703
    @gilbanrith8703 3 года назад +1

    Mate you look like Ant the commando

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  3 года назад

      I get that a lot, I am getting a hair cut today and might go a bit shorter than usual lol

  • @incremental_failure
    @incremental_failure 8 месяцев назад

    Your case of a "pint of Guinness at the pub" doesn't really sound like actual alcoholism. The real alcoholics like myself used to down 500-700ml of vodka/gin a night, every night. This was enough that you'd wake up still drunk, by afternoon you'd be sober and then start again.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  7 месяцев назад +1

      Glad to hear you’ have determined what someone else’s experience is :) best of luck with your sobriety journey. 🙏🏼💙

    • @incremental_failure
      @incremental_failure 7 месяцев назад

      @@MatthewToman7 I think you want attention and claim certain life experience. Nothing wrong with that, we need topics for RUclips videos after all.

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  7 месяцев назад +1

      @@incremental_failuresending you a lot of love 💙🙏🏻 have a great weekend.

  • @billymurray9043
    @billymurray9043 3 года назад

    4 years off "of" alcohol.

  • @todddenny4882
    @todddenny4882 11 месяцев назад +1

    You’re smarter than me, because I stopped @ 54yrs old 🤷🏼‍♂️

    • @MatthewToman7
      @MatthewToman7  11 месяцев назад

      Everything happens in the right time.