My parents lived with me and died whilst I was with them as I refused to send them to a ‘home’. . I am so grateful for the time I had with them and value it above going and chasing my happiness, like chasing is something to aspire to. They didn’t stop me from having a career and family or friends. I am blessed.
It’s really commendable because in this current generation rarely any kids do that, so you are very very exceptional, hope this will motivate someone else and thank you for sharing your story . My dad passed away early in my life and as I was working far away from home in India and my brother and family were living less than 50 feet away, my mother chose to live alone. Then we all siblings with our family migrated to USA and we were forced to leave our mother behind and though we made arrangements for taking care of her, during every phone conversation the question she asked was when are you taking me over there? As it was only few months since we came here and we were still struggling to make a foothold in USA, being new immigrants with families and menial jobs, A family meeting was called by our oldest Sister who brought us to USA, and well settled. In the meeting she told us she will move the papers to bring our mother to USA, provided anyone of the rest of the siblings give assurances that he/ she will take care of her because she’s not willing to do that. Nobody responded, within a couple of minutes and I even without consulting with my wife volunteered to take care of her, and my sister told me Thomas you just came here and struggling to make it and you don’t know how challenging is it to take care of a 83 year old mother here in this situation and I answered, Sister I have wife and three kids going to school and no matter what is my situation I have no option but need to take care of them and our mother raised seven children and l think I have the moral responsibility to take of her so no matter what, I will take care of her as I ami am taking care of my wife and children. And she came to USA few months later, lived rest of her life happily with my family and died at the age of 93 peacefully. I consider those 10 years as a blessing, and felt very happy being able to give back something in return for the unconditional love and challenges she faced while raising me.
My mother is over 70 years old and lives alone in a poor, rural area. When she's sick or in pain, she often hides it from her children and grandchildren, afraid to worry us. One time, she fell and couldn't get up; she couldn't even reach her phone to call for help. Luckily, my older sister happened to visit her that day. After that incident, I decided to leave my city job and move my family back to live closer to her. Since my little family moved back, I've noticed a significant improvement in her mental health. She's happier, especially when she plays with my young son. She tells stories from the old days, and there's the sound of children's laughter, small joys... things you can't buy with a phone, no matter how expensive it is.
God bless you for the right decision! I can intellectually understand the message from this video. However, it gives the feeling of such a loneliness and lack of gratitude - the best quality we have in our lives closely connected, if not to actually means it - LOVE. Gratitude. That is what God is waiting from us in exchange of most precious gift of all - life itself.
Solitude is my new normal since my sick husband died. I did think my adult sons would fill the ‘void’ doing the manly things but now I understand that expectation is causing suffering. Now I realize I’m on my own and will now practice un attachment. Full Circle here I am ready to do the work. 💜
Happiness is also temporary, it's a journey and not a destination. Life is fleeting and you must live in the moment to enjoy it, let go of attachment as it only leads to disappointment
It is not just a question of happiness, your parents when they get old cannot manage physically what they once did. So do you just abandon them? No, for goodness sake they gave you life so show compassion and kindness and take care of them in return with loving kindness
My parents lived with me until they passed away, and I stayed by their side because I couldn’t bring myself to send them to a care home. I’m incredibly grateful for the time we shared, and I treasure it far more than the idea of chasing after 'happiness' as if it were something to catch. They never held me back from pursuing my career, building a family, or maintaining friendships. I truly feel blessed
Speaking for myself, there is no greater joy for parents or children when we care for them in old age. My Mom was my best friend. They took care of you when you were a baby. When we care for our parents, we will have great blessings, peace, and gratitude. Nothing will bring you more joy. As difficult as it can be sometimes. I spent the last week with my mom, she was in a bad way healthwise, but nothing will ever make either of us happier. We got to say goodbye. She was 89 in 2011 when she passed. Don't cry because it's over, but smile because it happened. PS. Not everybody is cut out for this journey.
I live in my own hut,on my son and daughter- in-laws property, I am there if they need me, I would never interfere with their lives and journeys, and they give me the same respect. It is not the ideal answer, but for now it’s working. I wish everyone in my position find happiness and security. Love to all from Australia ❤❤
Thanks for this video. I am a 66 year old retired teacher, widowed and living with my son who is divorced. I have some issues with my legs which makes it difficult to walk out on my own without a stick. At home I happily complete all my daily chores, like cooking, cleaning, feeding the pets , and set apart time for my daily Puja and meditation. I also take online classes via zoom so that I don't have to go out and work . I am provided by government pension,so I feel i have a fulfilled life, mornings spend in quiet meditation, sipping tea alone, watching spiritual videos. I have my own room, and although,by all perspectives I may not be dancing and socializing and gossiping ,I find a quiet peace and contentment within. I do sometimes long to go out for vacations, but since that is not to be, i have" let go" that desire too. I live in gratitude and acceptance for what life has given me. My adult children still need me as my daughter,too, is recently widowed and seeks advice. And I am keeping house for my son. I feel fulfilled. I strongly resonate with this video , and thanks for sharing. It is as if The good Lord is talking to me via the video.My life has completed one cycle , I am once again single ,free, joyous, without a worry in the world, letting to of all desires, and having not much possessions to call my own and consequently not really bothered of what will happen to them when I pass away. I have a roof over my head and and meals on my table and bills are paid. What more would I want.
In an ideal world we would all love and support one another. In healthy families this is perfeclty possible - regular visits, shared activities, phone calls etc. But not in dysfuntional families where on eor both parents or their children are toxic, bitter and manipulative. In that case, living in close proximity with one another would be deeply traumatising.
Im 60 next birthday and i dont put any pressure on my kids, i will do anything for them as long as i am capable. I brought them here, they didnt ask to be here.
ftreedom of what? Take response and help others is better no one iven Buda can escape from dukka sufering .. in old age pain of body is natural and Buda have this eny one and pain itself is sufering if some one love make childe he atract or atach for women and desire sexual mast be there otherwise no childe camming so we need become real not bola bola dreaming abut free from atachment imposibile..
I've been missing my son for a couple of months as he's trying to sort things out for himself. I'm feeling lonely and, at times, bitter. Thank you for this video that helps me to 'sort things out', to regain new perspectives.
Attachment is a mental state. I can live very close to my daughter and still be internally distant, without needs and without expectations and still enjoy my grandchildren. Supporting each other is only possible if I don't live too far away. ..
This was my story for awhile. My son-in-law's parents live far away and he is often angry with them. He has only seen them 3 times in 15 years. I have had to endure his anger that with them that was directed at me. My daughter wanted to make him happy so I had to stay away way more than I wanted. I always was there to help out whenever they needed some help. I live 60 miles away so my visits involved me packing for a week stay. Now that I am 72 it is not an easy trip anymore. All three babies were born at home and my daughter had issues which left her in bed for while. I actually lived there each time for three months each time. My help has eneabled them to have a successful business and save money. They have a home that is half paid for and much more time to spend with their kids. I am grateful that they trust me and that we can have difficult conversations without it affecting anyone's relationship. My daughter will say to me..Mom, I think it is time for you to go home. This is so nice to know that we can all have our lives and not feel the need to hurt feelings when it is time to resume our seperate lives. I also know that they are planning for the day when I may need them more. We all take good care of our health so I expect that to not happen any time soon. The granddaughters I have absolutely adore and trust me with their little secrets. It is funny though because if there are any little secrets they always tell their parents anyhow. It has beena wild trip for me. I never expected to lose a child , a husband, and live only on social security but I am very content and happy.
It is absolutely normal for parents to be attached to their children, and for children to be attached to their parents. That is family: unconditional love, trust and support.
Looking after your parents is an act of selflessness, humility, love, duty. You can do all the meditation u want but inflicting pain by ignoring parents means you have only learnt attachment to a selfish desire for a practice of yoga. Subtle difference!
Life is a choice. It’s also a vicious circle. What goes around comes around. I consider it my sacred duty to be present whenever my parents need me. It’s not about attachment but my love for them. It’s a joy and a blessing to make sure they are happier as they age. Many of us believe that a retirement home is best for our parents. But best for who. What our parents did is their karma, how we respond will be our karma ❤
The ideal will be something in the middle: In old age one should be to a point independent, have one’s own interests and hobbies, activities and distractions, so as to live one’s own life and let the children live theirs, and not be a bit to them, but, at the same time, the old person can meet once in a while with his/her children and grandchildren and spend pleasant time with them.
It's amazing how a change in perspective, as Buddhism teaches, can make such a difference. Focusing on gratitude and compassion shifts my energy in a positive way
There is so much self reflection in this thread. It’s nice to see that RUclips has places that explore the human condition with respect and care for each other. Every family is different, but I see so much love and consideration for family situations and each other in the comment section. Glad to share this world with many of you.
Live with children by all means . Or they with you but neither be a burden to another . Have your own Life , your own income and it could be great . There is no one formula fits all
Attachment is the biggest self-curse one can inflict upon themselves unknowingly. This story is an eye-opener for those who share this view. Thanks very much for the dessiimination of such wisdom 🙏🙏🙏💐❤️
Emotional,dependence is never a good way to live. My mother, grandmother, and mother all lived together for a few years. It is one of my best memories and the experience shaped me. We were not dependent. We were strong individuals. Being an individual made it beautiful.
❤❤❤My parents lived with me and died whilst I was with them as I refused to send them to a ‘home’. . I am so grateful for the time I had with them and value it above going and chasing my happiness, like chasing is something to aspire to. They didn’t stop me from having a career and family or friends. I am blessed.💛💛💛
It is better to understand than be understood, better to comfort than be comforted, better to love than be loved. It is by self forgetting that one finds. It is by dying in mind that one awakens to eternal life.
many people live close to their children and grandchildren to support and help them, not with expectation to get help and support, love and giving is a natural mutual and reciprocal energy field. Religion often frames people through archetypal ideologies which do not reflect contemporary life.
My dad loved his newfound friends and life in his village. If he’d stayed with me and my husband, he’d have been isolated and on his home from 7-6 five days a week. That’s no life. I’m so glad he had four great years of all-day laughter and friends ❤
For over 2000 years, the young cared for their elderly parents - but now in the USA they shove their parents into a nursing home where immigrants ( who are a despised minority) take care of them while the billion dollar nursing industry rakes in the profits all the while reducing costs and care. Is this what this channel is suggesting is an improvement?
My parents lived with me until the end of their life and it was the best decision for them and myself. I feel so in peace now they are gone . It was hard at times but their life was extended by the decision I took to take them home.
What a wonderful explanation of how to live life with happiness ❤ time and lives are changing with choices.. no one wants to abandon their parents but sometimes with responsibilities of jobs children and their activities sometimes life becomes stressful and difficult… so children can’t give quality time to their parents… I now 70, don’t want to burden on my children… live on my own ,I have my hobbies my friends my volunteer time with community.. and close to my children and grandchildren …love to explore the world 🌎
I’m 70 too. I’m doing well, so I am not a burden to my children. I enjoy them, when I can, but we are all very busy having active lives. I enjoy them living fulfilling lives. In contrast, My 92 year old mother is critical and unpleasant expecting all of us to cater to her. She causes problems between us complaining about us, so no one wants her around anymore. If she was even a little more humble and grateful, maybe we would welcome her presence.
I looked after my mother and maiden aunt untill they went to their permanent resident. I would never send them to a home . I lost my dad when I was very young. Yes it’s not easy care… but today I have so much peace inside my heart because of tge choices I made for them and let them live with me untill the end. I think there is not just one path but others to .. one has to work out which gives most peace to both sides
Good asvice. On the other hand, sometimes people need help coping with disability and illness, and moving closer to where one's children live might enable mutual support and kindness without cloying control and demands.
If you haven't had any of your children young adults or a child transition from this world before you count yourself truly blessed ❤️ a few old age pains is nothing to complain about believe me . Let your children feel free to live their time here bringing up their family just as you have.
Thank you for this video 🙏 I have found it helpful, for looking towards letting go of attachments to my expectations of my adult children visiting me, which is a source of deep emotional pain as these expectations go unfulfilled. Thanks also for the idea expressed/suggested that as an ageing parent that I focus upon parenting my inner-child, I feel joy writing this 🙏 The Lord grant you eternal and eternally Peace and all Good 🙏
In short "Do not give responsibility of managing your life to your children for as long as you can manage on your own". Your children will likely appreciate it, and will likely be glad to help as needed. And keep the Doors of Life open as long as you can.🌈🌞‼
I also had my mother living with us for 20 plus years. I feel I did the right thing and helped her in her years of need. She died in her own bed here with us in attendance. It was the right thing to do and I don't have any remorse or regrets
In an ideal world, seniors would be taken care of so that they don’t have to resort to living in a tent in a city park or on a riverbank. Many seniors didn’t have jobs with pensions or 401k’s. So, these same people don’t have many options. We must teach new generations the importance of taking care of their elders.. they could hear history that they would never learn about, otherwise.
Most people can't handle this lesson in attachment based on conversations I have had where Parents admit the reason they had children was to take care of them in old age. I have have noticed a new phenomena where parents keep their sons way to long in the households of America. This creates more suffering ruining the freedom of the son to growing up and even provide future grand children which seems like an easier lesson to deal with then messing up their son lives early on....
Life is filled with soooo many emotions,attachments some we have been told what we could,and should expect. But another Buddhist teachings telling me to follow our OWN destiny. Amaste
I too am 92 years old. I live in Canada, while my children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren live in Europe. Many years ago, when I decided it was time, for me to return to Canada, my children decided to remain in Europe. I let go of their daily presence and the seeming need of other attachments. As a result, as my life continued and, as one by one, my friends died, I learned to relish the freedom of my old age. From now, until my death, I am as happy as I allow myself to be.
Good lessons I learned in my own old age. All what is said here is like my own story as I and my husband of 57 years are seeing these all over again. We are together -which is a blessing for sure. Thanks & much merit for the wisdom & insights here. Anumodana!
I feel that the elderly should live in a household with the younger generation as regular family members or in a adjuncted unit nearby - depending on needs and preferences. At least there should be regular visits and hanging out together - helping each other. My grandmother lived with us. It was nice for her and for us - she just belonged with us. In the same house, two stories up lived her sister, my great aunt. She was a wonderful influence and a great support for our family. We learned a lot from her. She was there before and after my grandma's passing - an important anker in our social network. I am grateful for both of these women's care and influence, their legacy. The younger ones can learn from the life experience and skills of the older ones. Young and old should be together and have each other. All these huge costs of old people's homes - crazy. As a young adult in a foreign country I attended a young adults' ward on Sundays for a while. It was awkward. I missed the senior generation as well as young kids and families swirling around. We need each other. And how much do grandchildren and parents also need grandparents! We should all be envolved with all stages of life to not lose perspective. The circle of life - let's be in it. I do not like it how the elderlies are shoved away into isolation in old people's homes. They say, it needs a village to raise a child. The more so it also needs the older generation!
My mother came to live with me when she developed dementia. It was the right thing to do. But while she was fully capable before dementia she lead her full life in her own place. In the video it was pointed out that expecting our grown children to take care of us and to be their center of attention becomes a burden to them. As older people, we are coming in full cycle of our lives. We still have things to do in our last stage of life. Taking care of our children when they were young was part of that cycle but we have come in full circle and we need to continue growing and learning.
Such a thoughtful perspective! Wishing everyone here health, happiness, and the wisdom to make choices that bring peace in their later years. 🙏 May we all find strength and clarity on our paths.
Hmmmm…. What if your friends have complicated and busy lives with lovely and caring families? Would you expect them to include you in their family circle?
It is true that attachment is a source of suffering because if that thing or person you're attached to goes, then you will indeed suffer...However if we avoid any form of attachment then nobody should ever marry. Nobody should ever have children...Idk, I think that as humans attachment is a natural feeling...Can you really love without attachment? Is it not normal to be attached to those you consider close like your family or your pet? You may try to avoid suffering but one way or another suffering will find you..It's part of life...A natural process
It is every children’s duty to take care of their parents during their old age .. when parents do really took care of them by giving good health education good relative and ensure settled life with good wife and family and financial support sometimes ..
Excellent timing to hear this S it applies to a variety of relationships of attachment as growing old becomes more clear. Suffering is clinging… Thank you
it is a folly to live alone in old age It is possible to live with children withoutinterfering with them Not expect warmth but give the warmth They also need love
Aging comes with multiple disabilities that require attention. Moving closer to children for support is not a bad idea. Spirituality is not always living a life of complete isolation to gain its outcome. Humans need socialization and social connection to thrive.
Yes You dont have to stay physically away from them and keep your mind away from attachments like many of us do in my couldture in India at the same time you help the young generation growand thrive help them with detached attachment
This video prioritizing detachment applies to a family without real love and with interest only in themsleves and their own lives. Families with love as the attachment connection do just fine. And people who place themselves and their spirituality first are beacons of light and love and wisdom for others. What it comes down to is alignment with real self which is love and light, and what is called here attachment is really joy and enjoyment of people aligned within themselves and heart, in love confidence self love and people aligned with others in the same state. Love binds in a natural divine connection and is not called attachment. Attachment stems from neediness not love.
The parent/child relationship is meant to move toward separation. As a parent, my purpose was to bring my child up to be an independent person. That phase of life is over now, and there is time for self-reflection and personal growth. No two people are completely alike. It's possible to love someone deeply, appreciate who they are, accept their differences, and not live next door.
Asians love to take care of their parents. They still live with their parents. Their bonding is very strong. I am 43 and stay with my 73 years old mother. I am so happy that we stay together. My life will be empty without my mother. In this fake world, where you are not sure whether your wife will be loyal to you or your friends will stay beside you in your bad times. Your parents are someone who will always be your side. Take care of them, is the mantra and you will be Happy.
I wished the video added one word "your living children", I am a bereaved parent. I lost my son 3 and half years ago. Detachment applies only to living children, never to the ones who passed. I am struggling with grief. I will appreciate if you talked about grief and loss of a child. Thanks much.
I am a Buddhist. I did not hear this concept in my Buddhist philosophy. But Buddha said children should help parents who are invalid. That's the bottom line. My children are emphasizing that I should live close to them now that I am getting older even though I am going strong and enjoy my independence. All these depends on the attitude of the children
This is very much relevant to eastern cultures where they might be viewing their children (or women), as their “possessions’, so I’m sure this kind of teachings will help them. As for us in the Western culture, I think we already know this…🎄💒
This video doesn't encourage children Not to take care of their parents. It is about your expectations about others that can cause suffering and pain. Children are yours,but actually not. Because they go their own way in life when they are adults. Parents are therefore caretakers of children. And when parents expect their children to become something they want and that doesn't happen that too causes suffering. Friendships in life can also cause suffering. Is someone a friend because of things they want to use from you? Or they expect you to follow what they say and are upset when you don't? Unconditional Love for someone shouldn't depend on what you expect from others
I move away from my daughters, when my parents became ill. My father died, and my mom required care and supervision. She died a year after Dad. I decided to stay in the small rural town, 3 hours from my children. My children resented me for the move. I've been away for 15 years, and they rarely visit, maybe once a year. However, the busy city life they lead is just too much for me. So I stay here, in my little cottage in the woods, and am perfectly content.
Fathers spend more time at work than with their children and now the same is happening with the mothers. I read somewhere that, from a mother's perspective, our children are born through us, not to or for us. It took me a long time to understand this. But since watching this, I am only beginning to understand however, it is no longer from a mother's perspective but the father as well
Christian’s have the opposite belief and have some very good relationships with their children. It’s what gives you happiness and keeps you healthy within your relationships rather than the distance of residence.
I can tell you from personal experience that it's not always a good idea. My MIL living on the same property (with her son for 33yrs but the last 12+ he's been married), now living with us the last 2+yrs, has basically destroyed our already damaged marriage. Before her dementia they used each other as surrogate spouses, and I was excluded from things I should have been included in (such as holiday planning and cooking). She also didnt think I was good enough for her son, not a good wife etc and poisoned his mind which caused a lot of issues. Now that she lives with us, she's mean and unmedicated, and everything is about her. Our marriage has always been on the back burner our whole almost 13yrs. I don't think it will survive this.
Delicate this video to my mother who chose her sons over her youngest daughter 😢. I am growing alone although we have 6 siblings. I have no rights to complaints because I carry the smallest voice in this 💔 family.
You are a woman. This world will not nurture you. You need to get strong and nurture yourself, and understand that none of this is your fault or under your control. You can have a happy life, but it must be yourself you rely on. Been there.
Sorry for that …. I as woman can never do wrong by my sex . I have 4 daughters and I make sure that a great life is ahead of them . They are welcome in our home forever
My parents lived with me and died whilst I was with them as I refused to send them to a ‘home’. . I am so grateful for the time I had with them and value it above going and chasing my happiness, like chasing is something to aspire to. They didn’t stop me from having a career and family or friends. I am blessed.
@@Tarantella1924 Have pleasure always and Thanks for watching
It’s really commendable because in this current generation rarely any kids do that, so you are very very exceptional, hope this will motivate someone else and thank you for sharing your story .
My dad passed away early in my life and as I was working far away from home in India and my brother and family were living less than 50 feet away, my mother chose to live alone. Then we all siblings with our family migrated to USA and we were forced to leave our mother behind and though we made arrangements for taking care of her, during every phone conversation the question she asked was when are you taking me over there? As it was only few months since we came here and we were still struggling to make a foothold in USA, being new immigrants with families and menial jobs, A family meeting was called by our oldest Sister who brought us to USA, and well settled. In the meeting she told us she will move the papers to bring our mother to USA, provided anyone of the rest of the siblings give assurances that he/ she will take care of her because she’s not willing to do that. Nobody responded, within a couple of minutes and I even without consulting with my wife volunteered to take care of her, and my sister told me Thomas you just came here and struggling to make it and you don’t know how challenging is it to take care of a 83 year old mother here in this situation and I answered, Sister I have wife and three kids going to school and no matter what is my situation I have no option but need to take care of them and our mother raised seven children and l think I have the moral responsibility to take of her so no matter what, I will take care of her as I ami am taking care of my wife and children. And she came to USA few months later, lived rest of her life happily with my family and died at the age of 93 peacefully. I consider those 10 years as a blessing, and felt very happy being able to give back something in return for the unconditional love and challenges she faced while raising me.
@Tarantella1924 Exactly and that's how it should be. Not abandoning them when they are old.
You are sn exception.
@@SathiNair-k7p I hope not.
My mother is over 70 years old and lives alone in a poor, rural area. When she's sick or in pain, she often hides it from her children and grandchildren, afraid to worry us. One time, she fell and couldn't get up; she couldn't even reach her phone to call for help. Luckily, my older sister happened to visit her that day. After that incident, I decided to leave my city job and move my family back to live closer to her. Since my little family moved back, I've noticed a significant improvement in her mental health. She's happier, especially when she plays with my young son. She tells stories from the old days, and there's the sound of children's laughter, small joys... things you can't buy with a phone, no matter how expensive it is.
@@TheWisdomGarden1 Thanks for watching
Blessed are you. Blessed will you always be. Never hurt her. Always keep her happy. It will bring immense happiness and prosperity to you.
In
@@SriShridhar Thank you for your encouraging words !
God bless you for the right decision! I can intellectually understand the message from this video. However, it gives the feeling of such a loneliness and lack of gratitude - the best quality we have in our lives closely connected, if not to actually means it - LOVE. Gratitude. That is what God is waiting from us in exchange of most precious gift of all - life itself.
The point is don’t do something out of expectation or obligation. But if something is done out of love, embrace it.
@@FatMatters much love
Isn't obligation an actual love?
@@zorkabiljecki7408 no.
Solitude is my new normal since my sick husband died. I did think my adult sons would fill the ‘void’ doing the manly things but now I understand that expectation is causing suffering. Now I realize I’m on my own and will now practice un attachment. Full Circle here I am ready to do the work. 💜
@@kimberlybegonia2869 good job and have pleasure always and Thanks for watching
I'm so sorry for your loss x
This is right on. If we depend on our children or anyone else for our happiness, we will suffer. We need to make our own happiness!
@@j.johnson2270 very true Thanks so much for watching
Happiness is also temporary, it's a journey and not a destination. Life is fleeting and you must live in the moment to enjoy it, let go of attachment as it only leads to disappointment
It is not just a question of happiness, your parents when they get old cannot manage physically what they once did. So do you just abandon them? No, for goodness sake they gave you life so show compassion and kindness and take care of them in return with loving kindness
Plan to go to a nursing home now itself
My parents lived with me until they passed away, and I stayed by their side because I couldn’t bring myself to send them to a care home. I’m incredibly grateful for the time we shared, and I treasure it far more than the idea of chasing after 'happiness' as if it were something to catch. They never held me back from pursuing my career, building a family, or maintaining friendships. I truly feel blessed
@@TheInnerSecrets-p8o good work, Thanks so much for watching.
Speaking for myself, there is no greater joy for parents or children when we care for them in old age. My Mom was my best friend. They took care of you when you were a baby. When we care for our parents, we will have great blessings, peace, and gratitude.
Nothing will bring you more joy. As difficult as it can be sometimes. I spent the last week with my mom, she was in a bad way
healthwise, but nothing will ever make either of us happier. We got to say goodbye. She was 89 in 2011 when she passed.
Don't cry because it's over, but smile because it happened.
PS. Not everybody is cut out for this journey.
Thanks for that and have pleasure always in watching my videos
Very helpful advice. Most grateful.
Yes!!! Lovely!!!
I live in my own hut,on my son and daughter- in-laws property, I am there if they need me, I would never interfere with their lives and journeys, and they give me the same respect. It is not the ideal answer, but for now it’s working. I wish everyone in my position find happiness and security. Love to all from Australia ❤❤
Wow that is great have pleasure always and Thanks for watching
I'm 73, single and have no children....but the lessons are still valid ❤🙏
@@stephenridley1153 Thanks so much for watching and take care wherever you are.
Thanks for this video. I am a 66 year old retired teacher, widowed and living with my son who is divorced. I have some issues with my legs which makes it difficult to walk out on my own without a stick. At home I happily complete all my daily chores, like cooking, cleaning, feeding the pets , and set apart time for my daily Puja and meditation. I also take online classes via zoom so that I don't have to go out and work . I am provided by government pension,so I feel i have a fulfilled life, mornings spend in quiet meditation, sipping tea alone, watching spiritual videos. I have my own room, and although,by all perspectives I may not be dancing and socializing and gossiping ,I find a quiet peace and contentment within. I do sometimes long to go out for vacations, but since that is not to be, i have" let go" that desire too. I live in gratitude and acceptance for what life has given me. My adult children still need me as my daughter,too, is recently widowed and seeks advice. And I am keeping house for my son. I feel fulfilled. I strongly resonate with this video , and thanks for sharing. It is as if The good Lord is talking to me via the video.My life has completed one cycle , I am once again single ,free, joyous, without a worry in the world, letting to of all desires, and having not much possessions to call my own and consequently not really bothered of what will happen to them when I pass away. I have a roof over my head and and meals on my table and bills are paid. What more would I want.
@@nandinisinha6117 Thanks so much for watching have pleasure always share the video to others so that they can learn also
@@ZenPhilosophy1723 yes
Perfectly said. 👌👍🏻.
In an ideal world we would all love and support one another. In healthy families this is perfeclty possible - regular visits, shared activities, phone calls etc. But not in dysfuntional families where on eor both parents or their children are toxic, bitter and manipulative. In that case, living in close proximity with one another would be deeply traumatising.
@@mjbreitmeyer2666 Have pleasure always and Thanks for watching
Yes, toxic aging parents do not deserve their children’s attention!
Absolutely ❤
Im 60 next birthday and i dont put any pressure on my kids, i will do anything for them as long as i am capable. I brought them here, they didnt ask to be here.
@@freedom4life123 That is great
My father expressed the same to me. This made relating to him a joy.
We all asked to be here or we wouldn't
@@kentmccoy592 l don't recall asking, in utero. My mother resented my existence in the first place, so she didn't even ask.
Non attachment & non expectation leads to freedom & joy . Love and blessings .
@@luckydesilva6733 much love thanks for watching
ftreedom of what? Take response and help others is better no one iven Buda can escape from dukka sufering .. in old age pain of body is natural and Buda have this eny one and pain itself is sufering if some one love make childe he atract or atach for women and desire sexual mast be there otherwise no childe camming so we need become real not bola bola dreaming abut free from atachment imposibile..
I've been missing my son for a couple of months as he's trying to sort things out for himself. I'm feeling lonely and, at times, bitter. Thank you for this video that helps me to 'sort things out', to regain new perspectives.
@@casard5235 Thanks so much for watching
Attachment is a mental state. I can live very close to my daughter and still be internally distant, without needs and without expectations and still enjoy my grandchildren. Supporting each other is only possible if I don't live too far away. ..
That is good and Thanks so much for watching
This was my story for awhile. My son-in-law's parents live far away and he is often angry with them. He has only seen them 3 times in 15 years. I have had to endure his anger that with them that was directed at me. My daughter wanted to make him happy so I had to stay away way more than I wanted. I always was there to help out whenever they needed some help. I live 60 miles away so my visits involved me packing for a week stay. Now that I am 72 it is not an easy trip anymore. All three babies were born at home and my daughter had issues which left her in bed for while. I actually lived there each time for three months each time. My help has eneabled them to have a successful business and save money. They have a home that is half paid for and much more time to spend with their kids. I am grateful that they trust me and that we can have difficult conversations without it affecting anyone's relationship. My daughter will say to me..Mom, I think it is time for you to go home. This is so nice to know that we can all have our lives and not feel the need to hurt feelings when it is time to resume our seperate lives. I also know that they are planning for the day when I may need them more. We all take good care of our health so I expect that to not happen any time soon. The granddaughters I have absolutely adore and trust me with their little secrets. It is funny though because if there are any little secrets they always tell their parents anyhow. It has beena wild trip for me. I never expected to lose a child , a husband, and live only on social security but I am very content and happy.
It is absolutely normal for parents to be attached to their children, and for children to be attached to their parents. That is family: unconditional love, trust and support.
Thanks so much for watching
You mentioned parents and children.
How about the grandparents?
Thats not the point of the story.
Bullshit ..
Dependency is an illness , all wild animals weaning their off spring ..forever it is a biological design ..we are not so different
It’s very “normal”. This video is about whether it makes people happy. Many “normal” behaviors cause unnecessary suffering.
Looking after your parents is an act of selflessness, humility, love, duty. You can do all the meditation u want but inflicting pain by ignoring parents means you have only learnt attachment to a selfish desire for a practice of yoga. Subtle difference!
@@KunjanChauhan Thanks for watching
Thanks, you said that beautifully! I think humans have the tendency to go from one extreme to the next.
Life is a choice. It’s also a vicious circle. What goes around comes around. I consider it my sacred duty to be present whenever my parents need me. It’s not about attachment but my love for them. It’s a joy and a blessing to make sure they are happier as they age. Many of us believe that a retirement home is best for our parents. But best for who. What our parents did is their karma, how we respond will be our karma ❤
Thanks for watching
The ideal will be something in the middle: In old age one should be to a point independent, have one’s own interests and hobbies, activities and distractions, so as to live one’s own life and let the children live theirs, and not be a bit to them, but, at the same time, the old person can meet once in a while with his/her children and grandchildren and spend pleasant time with them.
Have pleasure always and Thanks so much for watching
Honor thy father and mother. Being close but honoring their own lifes is a blessing for all.
@@kandndad3527 Thanks so much for watching
I am at that place which you talked about in this video. It came at just the right time, and made me see the truth. Thank you so much.
Thanks so much for watching the support of watching have pleasure always.
It's amazing how a change in perspective, as Buddhism teaches, can make such a difference. Focusing on gratitude and compassion shifts my energy in a positive way
@@ListeningtotheSoul Thanks so much for watching
There is so much self reflection in this thread. It’s nice to see that RUclips has places that explore the human condition with respect and care for each other.
Every family is different, but I see so much love and consideration for family situations and each other in the comment section.
Glad to share this world with many of you.
@@sleepyhollowgirl1294 Thanks for watching.
I am a Christian and I fully agree with the message of non attachment to people or things at any age.
Thanks for the video much appreciated 🙏🏻
Much welcomed Thanks for understanding the message
Live with children by all means . Or they with you but neither be a burden to another . Have your own
Life , your own income and it could be great . There is no one formula fits all
@@kiransinghrawat5018 Have pleasure always and Thanks for watching
good point
Attachment is the biggest self-curse one can inflict upon themselves unknowingly. This story is an eye-opener for those who share this view. Thanks very much for the dessiimination of such wisdom
🙏🙏🙏💐❤️
Am glad you liked the video have pleasure always 🙏
Emotional,dependence is never a good way to live. My mother, grandmother, and mother all lived together for a few years. It is one of my best memories and the experience shaped me. We were not dependent. We were strong individuals. Being an individual made it beautiful.
Thanks for watching that is Agood enlightenment
I don’t want to live with my children, I live in a retirement home. I wouldn’t want to complicate both my life or indeed my childrens .
Take care wherever you are and Thanks so much for watching
❤❤❤My parents lived with me and died whilst I was with them as I refused to send them to a ‘home’. . I am so grateful for the time I had with them and value it above going and chasing my happiness, like chasing is something to aspire to. They didn’t stop me from having a career and family or friends. I am blessed.💛💛💛
Thanks so much for watching
@@ZenPhilosophy1723 ❤❤❤
Sila, samadhi and prajñā - the cultivation of ethical behaviour, meditation and wisdom is the best path for all. 🙏
@@petewebb6952 Thanks for watching and have pleasure always
It is better to understand than be understood, better to comfort than be comforted, better to love than be loved. It is by self forgetting that one finds. It is by dying in mind that one awakens to eternal life.
@@robertharrelson5024 Thanks so much for watching and have pleasure always.
As Jesus said: It’s giving that we receive.
many people live close to their children and grandchildren to support and help them, not with expectation to get help and support, love and giving is a natural mutual and reciprocal energy field. Religion often frames people through archetypal ideologies which do not reflect contemporary life.
@@susanvanaken
My dad loved his newfound friends and life in his village. If he’d stayed with me and my husband, he’d have been isolated and on his home from 7-6 five days a week. That’s no life. I’m so glad he had four great years of all-day laughter and friends ❤
That is very good, am glad you watched the video have pleasure always
I take care of my mom and I wouldn't change it.
@@janicetelfer6211 That is good and Thanks so much for watching
Super!! This is a load of nonsense
For over 2000 years, the young cared for their elderly parents - but now in the USA they shove their parents into a nursing home where immigrants ( who are a despised minority) take care of them while the billion dollar nursing industry rakes in the profits all the while reducing costs and care. Is this what this channel is suggesting is an improvement?
@jimosborne2 right!
My parents lived with me until the end of their life and it was the best decision for them and myself. I feel so in peace now they are gone . It was hard at times but their life was extended by the decision I took to take them home.
@@merita47 Thanks so much for watching
What a wonderful explanation of how to live life with happiness ❤ time and lives are changing with choices.. no one wants to abandon their parents but sometimes with responsibilities of jobs children and their activities sometimes life becomes stressful and difficult… so children can’t give quality time to their parents… I now 70, don’t want to burden on my children… live on my own ,I have my hobbies my friends my volunteer time with community.. and close to my children and grandchildren …love to explore the world 🌎
Wow that is amazing, Thanks so much for watching
I’m 70 too. I’m doing well, so I am not a burden to my children. I enjoy them, when I can, but we are all very busy having active lives. I enjoy them living fulfilling lives.
In contrast, My 92 year old mother is critical and unpleasant expecting all of us to cater to her. She causes problems between us complaining about us, so no one wants her around anymore. If she was even a little more humble and grateful, maybe we would welcome her presence.
I looked after my mother and maiden aunt untill they went to their permanent resident. I would never send them to a home . I lost my dad when I was very young.
Yes it’s not easy care… but today I have so much peace inside my heart because of tge choices I made for them and let them live with me untill the end. I think there is not just one path but others to .. one has to work out which gives most peace to both sides
@@beadas1108 Thanks so much for watching.
Good asvice. On the other hand, sometimes people need help coping with disability and illness, and moving closer to where one's children live might enable mutual support and kindness without cloying control and demands.
@@karenmcgady7637 Thanks for that Thanks for watching.
If you haven't had any of your children young adults or a child transition from this world before you count yourself truly blessed ❤️ a few old age pains is nothing to complain about believe me .
Let your children feel free to live their time here bringing up their family just as you have.
True 👍Thanks so much for watching.
Thank you for this video 🙏 I have found it helpful, for looking towards letting go of attachments to my expectations of my adult children visiting me, which is a source of deep emotional pain as these expectations go unfulfilled. Thanks also for the idea expressed/suggested that as an ageing parent that I focus upon parenting my inner-child, I feel joy writing this 🙏
The Lord grant you eternal and eternally Peace and all Good 🙏
@@BECOMEASALITTLECHILD Thanks so much for watching Share it to others so that they can learn.
Human attachment is fundamental to all humans and not having it leads to the greatest suffering of all: emptiness and disconnection.
@@spinnettdesigns Thanks for watching
In short "Do not give responsibility of managing your life to your children for as long as you can manage on your own". Your children will likely appreciate it, and will likely be glad to help as needed. And keep the Doors of Life open as long as you can.🌈🌞‼
@@rafiquekhan320 Am glad you liked the video have pleasure always and Thanks for watching
I also had my mother living with us for 20 plus years. I feel I did the right thing and helped her in her years of need. She died in her own bed here with us in attendance. It was the right thing to do and I don't have any remorse or regrets
@@beverleybailey3161 Thanks for watching and have pleasure always
In an ideal world, seniors would be taken care of so that they don’t have to resort to living in a tent in a city park or on a riverbank. Many seniors didn’t have jobs with pensions or 401k’s. So, these same people don’t have many options. We must teach new generations the importance of taking care of their elders.. they could hear history that they would never learn about, otherwise.
Thanks for this note, Thanks so much for watching.
Most people can't handle this lesson in attachment based on conversations I have had where Parents admit the reason they had children was to take care of them in old age. I have have noticed a new phenomena where parents keep their sons way to long in the households of America. This creates more suffering ruining the freedom of the son to growing up and even provide future grand children which seems like an easier lesson to deal with then messing up their son lives early on....
Am glad you liked the video have pleasure always
Thank you for sharing such enlightening teachings. They bring peace and clarity to my daily life. Truly inspiring!
@@MindfulAwakening11 much welcomed share to others so that they can learn.
Life is filled with soooo many emotions,attachments some we have been told what we could,and should expect. But another Buddhist teachings telling me to follow our OWN destiny. Amaste
@@michelewills6350 Thanks for watching
One size does not fit all. We all have different characters and lives. I am an introvert and 92 years old.
Much love and Thanks so much for watching
I too am 92 years old.
I live in Canada, while my children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren live in Europe.
Many years ago, when I decided it was time, for me to return to Canada, my children decided to remain in Europe.
I let go of their daily presence and the seeming need of other attachments.
As a result, as my life continued and, as one by one, my friends died, I learned to relish the freedom of my old age.
From now, until my death, I am as happy as I allow myself to be.
Good lessons I learned in my own old age. All what is said here is like my own story as I and my husband of 57 years are seeing these all over again. We are together -which is a blessing for sure. Thanks & much merit for the wisdom & insights here. Anumodana!
Have pleasure always and share to your family and friends to learn more.
do not have any feeling for anyone or anything , do not need to feel good or feel bad. nothing will affect u. live in peace
I feel that the elderly should live in a household with the younger generation as regular family members or in a adjuncted unit nearby - depending on needs and preferences. At least there should be regular visits and hanging out together - helping each other. My grandmother lived with us. It was nice for her and for us - she just belonged with us. In the same house, two stories up lived her sister, my great aunt. She was a wonderful influence and a great support for our family. We learned a lot from her. She was there before and after my grandma's passing - an important anker in our social network. I am grateful for both of these women's care and influence, their legacy. The younger ones can learn from the life experience and skills of the older ones. Young and old should be together and have each other. All these huge costs of old people's homes - crazy. As a young adult in a foreign country I attended a young adults' ward on Sundays for a while. It was awkward. I missed the senior generation as well as young kids and families swirling around. We need each other. And how much do grandchildren and parents also need grandparents! We should all be envolved with all stages of life to not lose perspective. The circle of life - let's be in it. I do not like it how the elderlies are shoved away into isolation in old people's homes.
They say, it needs a village to raise a child. The more so it also needs the older generation!
@@kasko8550 Thanks for that take have pleasure always in watching my videos.
so true
I am familiar with Buddhist teachings and I disagree with your advice . 🙏👲🧑✈️🧑💻🙏. 🌳🧓🏠🌳.
My mother came to live with me when she developed dementia. It was the right thing to do. But while she was fully capable before dementia she lead her full life in her own place. In the video it was pointed out that expecting our grown children to take care of us and to be their center of attention becomes a burden to them. As older people, we are coming in full cycle of our lives. We still have things to do in our last stage of life. Taking care of our children when they were young was part of that cycle but we have come in full circle and we need to continue growing and learning.
@@kava2021 Thanks for watching
This is what true love is about.
Doing everything to help loved person to live free life.
Thanks for watching and understanding the message
Wise words, we can feel free, let go and love whatever comes and enjoy life 😂❤
Thanks for watching
Thank you for this exploration of thoughts about older ages. It is hard to know our purpose when we gain an older age. I appreciate these thoughts.
Much love for watching
Such a thoughtful perspective! Wishing everyone here health, happiness, and the wisdom to make choices that bring peace in their later years. 🙏 May we all find strength and clarity on our paths.
@@buddhisminenglish101 Thanks so much for watching
do not have any feeling for anyone or anything , do not need to feel good or feel bad. nothing will affect u. live in peace
A real thanks of gratitude for making this video❤
Thanks so much for watching have pleasure always and Thanks for watching Share to others so that they can learn also.
Friends are the family you chose. Chose wisely!
Very True, Take care and Thanks so much for watching
choose
Hmmmm…. What if your friends have complicated and busy lives with lovely and caring families? Would you expect them to include you in their family circle?
Children should take care of their parents. Even living with parents is beautiful
Thanks so much for watching and have pleasure always.
great video. Wouldn’t it be better to be an animal. No attachment. Just raise the kids to be adults and let them live their life.
@@ksjames1859 great love thanks for watching have pleasure always.
It is true that attachment is a source of suffering because if that thing or person you're attached to goes, then you will indeed suffer...However if we avoid any form of attachment then nobody should ever marry. Nobody should ever have children...Idk, I think that as humans attachment is a natural feeling...Can you really love without attachment? Is it not normal to be attached to those you consider close like your family or your pet? You may try to avoid suffering but one way or another suffering will find you..It's part of life...A natural process
@@dodoraptor8387 am glad you liked the video have pleasure always
do not have any feeling for anyone or anything , do not need to feel good or feel bad. nothing will affect u. live in peace
@David-x2c8l Easier said than done...Isn't this the equivalent of being a zombie? How can humans not feel emotions? That would be a very dull life.
yes agree. They are your family anyway ,children , it's natural to be attached to your family.
@@dodoraptor8387 - to reach enlightenment , that is the true way
It is every children’s duty to take care of their parents during their old age .. when parents do really took care of them by giving good health education good relative and ensure settled life with good wife and family and financial support sometimes ..
True, am glad you liked the video have pleasure always
@@HareKrishnaHareRama101 real love is expecting nothing back .
@@HareKrishnaHareRama101 well said!
Excellent timing to hear this S it applies to a variety of relationships of attachment as growing old becomes more clear.
Suffering is clinging…
Thank you
@@rebeccaelle135 much welcomed and Thanks for watching.
Every word in this video is like a soothing balm for the soul. Keep up the amazing work!
@@BuddhasTeachings24 Thanks so much for watching
it is a folly to live alone in old age It is possible to live with children withoutinterfering with them Not expect warmth but give the warmth They also need love
@@sundarsrinivasan8327 Have pleasure always and Thanks for watching
Buddhism is not just a religion but also a meaningful philosophy of life. Thank you for the profound insights in this video!
Have pleasure always by watching and Thanks for the support.
Just the right topic at my perfect time. I will seek this direction 😊
@@kayl674 Thanks for watching and have pleasure always in watching my videos.
Aging comes with multiple disabilities that require attention. Moving closer to children for support is not a bad idea. Spirituality is not always living a life of complete isolation to gain its outcome. Humans need socialization and social connection to thrive.
Thanks so much for watching
Yes You dont have to stay physically away from them and keep your mind away from attachments like many of us do in my couldture in India at the same time you help the young generation growand thrive help them with detached attachment
Thanks so much for watching
Thank you this message has to be shared..it came when I need it most
Thanks so much for watching Share the message to your family and friends.
This video prioritizing detachment applies to a family without real love and with interest only in themsleves and their own lives. Families with love as the attachment connection do just fine. And people who place themselves and their spirituality first are beacons of light and love and wisdom for others. What it comes down to is alignment with real self which is love and light, and what is called here attachment is really joy and enjoyment of people aligned within themselves and heart, in love confidence self love and people aligned with others in the same state. Love binds in a natural divine connection and is not called attachment. Attachment stems from neediness not love.
@@FuchsiaFire444 Thank you for watching
Give what you can take what you can. Enjoy your life
Much love and Thanks so much for watching
The parent/child relationship is meant to move toward separation.
As a parent, my purpose was to bring my child up to be an independent person.
That phase of life is over now, and there is time for self-reflection and personal growth.
No two people are completely alike. It's possible to love someone deeply, appreciate who they are, accept their differences, and not live next door.
@@madelinemaize1426 great advice, Thanks for watching and have pleasure always.
Asians love to take care of their parents. They still live with their parents. Their bonding is very strong. I am 43 and stay with my 73 years old mother. I am so happy that we stay together. My life will be empty without my mother. In this fake world, where you are not sure whether your wife will be loyal to you or your friends will stay beside you in your bad times. Your parents are someone who will always be your side. Take care of them, is the mantra and you will be Happy.
That is very good and Thanks for watching.
I wished the video added one word "your living children", I am a bereaved parent. I lost my son 3 and half years ago. Detachment applies only to living children, never to the ones who passed. I am struggling with grief. I will appreciate if you talked about grief and loss of a child. Thanks much.
There is a video that I made about grief just check my videos, Thanks so much for watching.
I am a Buddhist. I did not hear this concept in my Buddhist philosophy. But Buddha said children should help parents who are invalid. That's the bottom line.
My children are emphasizing that I should live close to them now that I am getting older even though I am going strong and enjoy my independence.
All these depends on the attitude of the children
Thanks just watch the video to the end you will understand the message well.
These videos are my go-to for positivity. Even on the toughest days, they help me find something good. So happy to be part of this community! 💛✨
Have pleasure always much love for the support
do not have any feeling for anyone or anything , do not need to feel good or feel bad. nothing will affect u. live in peace
In India we live with our children ❤
@@Soumi-dc2ri it's good and thanks so much for watching.
Stay in India. In the USA the family breaks apart.
In India we live with our children....... and fight together 😂
Good to know. In India it is "BANAPRASTHA". It is the mind one should turn to at old age for peace.
@@imcftsnetovision9069 very great and Thanks so much for watching.
When someone makes plan on what they want when they get older, there no need to be dependent on others. Times have changed and so must we.
@@gloriabegay6641 very well, Thanks so much for watching
"Your video was truly inspiring and insightful; you did an incredible job bringing the topic to life!"
Thanks so much and have pleasure always
This is very much relevant to eastern cultures where they might be viewing their children (or women), as their “possessions’, so I’m sure this kind of teachings will help them. As for us in the Western culture, I think we already know this…🎄💒
@@dianag.9866 Thanks for watching
How profound. Just the spiritual medicine i need
Have pleasure always and Thanks for watching
Thank you. Very helpful to me as a new Grandmother. 🙏🏼❤
@@kalinasofia much welcomed have pleasure always
One hundred percent correct..❤
Am glad you liked the video have pleasure always
Love this. Thank you.
@@AnnelisedeWet Thanks so much for watching
Not always, it depends on so many things, I think!
Thanks so much for watching have pleasure always
This video doesn't encourage children Not to take care of their parents. It is about your expectations about others that can cause suffering and pain. Children are yours,but actually not. Because they go their own way in life when they are adults. Parents are therefore caretakers of children. And when parents expect their children to become something they want and that doesn't happen that too causes suffering. Friendships in life can also cause suffering. Is someone a friend because of things they want to use from you? Or they expect you to follow what they say and are upset when you don't? Unconditional Love for someone shouldn't depend on what you expect from others
@@brianderiemacker5234 Very true Thanks for understanding and Thanks for watching have pleasure always.
Thank you for sharing these timeless lessons from Buddhism and Zen wisdom
@@CandleOfWisdom Have pleasure always in watching my videos
Its personal choice some people like to b social as long they live & some r happy by themselves. Whatever is ur choice live with that & stay happy
@@monanaheed1333 Thank so much for watching
I move away from my daughters, when my parents became ill. My father died, and my mom required care and supervision. She died a year after Dad. I decided to stay in the small rural town, 3 hours from my children. My children resented me for the move. I've been away for 15 years, and they rarely visit, maybe once a year. However, the busy city life they lead is just too much for me. So I stay here, in my little cottage in the woods, and am perfectly content.
@@stacyrosa6672 Thanks so much for watching.
Very useful contained true meaning of life journey of relationships Not only with children as well the others.Thanks
@@jennyto9163 Have pleasure always for watching much love for the support.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Much Thanks for watching
Fathers spend more time at work than with their children and now the same is happening with the mothers. I read somewhere that, from a mother's perspective, our children are born through us, not to or for us. It took me a long time to understand this. But since watching this, I am only beginning to understand however, it is no longer from a mother's perspective but the father as well
Am glad you watched the video have pleasure always.
which is why three generations should live under one roof….. we discard the elderly
@@nadamijak9338 Thanks for watching
Just what I needed to read today ❤❤❤ thank you 😀
Have pleasure always and Thanks for watching
great video, now I won't feel guilty for ignoring my parents
@@zanderthegreat888 Have pleasure always for watching
Christian’s have the opposite belief and have some very good relationships with their children. It’s what gives you happiness and keeps you healthy within your relationships rather than the distance of residence.
@@Dargyful That is a good opinion, Thanks so much for watching
Nothing's wrong for the parent living close to their children ... I would love to take care of my mom in her old age.
@@i-jc8753 thanks so much for that opinion and Thanks for watching
Wow, it opened my my heart i fully understand now.
@@mackay6417 Have pleasure always and Thanks so much for watching.
I can tell you from personal experience that it's not always a good idea. My MIL living on the same property (with her son for 33yrs but the last 12+ he's been married), now living with us the last 2+yrs, has basically destroyed our already damaged marriage. Before her dementia they used each other as surrogate spouses, and I was excluded from things I should have been included in (such as holiday planning and cooking). She also didnt think I was good enough for her son, not a good wife etc and poisoned his mind which caused a lot of issues. Now that she lives with us, she's mean and unmedicated, and everything is about her. Our marriage has always been on the back burner our whole almost 13yrs. I don't think it will survive this.
@@desert_moon ooh! Sorry for what you are going through, take caution and take care Thanks for watching.
Delicate this video to my mother who chose her sons over her youngest daughter 😢. I am growing alone although we have 6 siblings. I have no rights to complaints because I carry the smallest voice in this 💔 family.
@@felixc914 so sorry take heart all will be well, share to your family and friends to also learn more like you.
aww 😔
You are a woman. This world will not nurture you. You need to get strong and nurture yourself, and understand that none of this is your fault or under your control. You can have a happy life, but it must be yourself you rely on. Been there.
Sorry for that …. I as woman can never do wrong by my sex . I have 4 daughters and I make sure that a great life is ahead of them . They are welcome in our home forever