Perhaps instead of just saying the person holding resentment needs to move past it, just perhaps the person causing the resentment first needs to stop doing whatever it is that causes the resentment.
2-way street. If one who causes the resentment make change to be a better person from own mistake. The other should not keep bringing it up and onto the main discussion when they've changed. At that point, it is them who is holding onto baggages while the other acknowledged and made efforts to learn.
Both need to happen. The resented party isn't really given the space to show the resentful party they don't want to make them resentful anymore if the other person isn't giving them the chance because they can't let go of said resentment. Basically, give them a chance. If they aren't given a chance, they can't show you they've changed. If they haven't changed, it will show itself soon again that way as well.
@@sarahgh5389 exactly, they fail to mention this one point. sure you can forgive, and let go of resentment. sure. sure. but what if it keeps happenning? That's when you have to draw the line, and move on.
Then you leave. If you did the work to forgive them and move past your resentment but they‘re not putting in the work to change their hurtful behaviours, leave them. They WILL suffer your loss, believe me.
How long did you take to let go of your resentments? I’m trying really hard to change too but there are certain qualities good or bad that made us, us. I feel like I’m spiraling downwards like you mentioned about Adam during your resentful phase.
This was probably the best and most cohesive video I have seen on this topic. I started with trying to understand how to forgive, because growing up I didn't have that role model to show me how in a healthy manner. I knew how to be the brightest person in the room, but could never understand how handle various emotions nor truly FEEL forgiveness in the overall situation until a couple months ago either. This idea of resentment isn't limited to romantic relationship, but by many other relationships in an individual's life. Your explanation truly has an articulate and all-encompassing aspect to it. Thank you so much for your insights.
I hope this helps someone the way it did for me. Jesus forgave those who wronged Him out of deep love and COMPASSION, even when He was unjustly treated. ❤ His forgiveness was rooted in His understanding of human weakness and His commitment to show mercy. On the cross, Jesus famously prayed, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing" (Luke 23:34). This shows that even in the face of betrayal and suffering, Jesus chose to see the bigger picture-that people act out of ignorance, fear, or misguided intentions. Jesus' example of forgiveness teaches that love and mercy are more powerful than anger or resentment. He didn’t let the wrongs done to Him define His response, but instead, He chose forgiveness as a way to bring healing and reconciliation. This act of forgiveness is central to His teachings and serves as an example of how we, too, can forgive, EVEN when it’s difficult.
Sorry but it seems like this woman is the problem…..the over use of your lips needs to be reduced and shared amongst your partner (just an fyi). Also she didn’t hesitate to list all the issues he caused her but didn’t break down 1 item of herself. We’re not perfect but I truly hope those who make these videos re-watch them.
Thanks so much for sharing @cdoublebeats733 and I’m so sorry to hear you’re dealing with some challenges in your relationship. Just know it is possible to turn things around. It wasn’t that long ago that we were experience a lot of resentment too. It did take learning a new way and taking really uncomfortable action though. Our 4 week Recreate Your Relationship program would be perfect for what you’re currently experiencing. In just 4 weeks you’ll Discover The Simple & Easy 4 Step Proven Framework To Better Communication & Connection In Your Relationship! You can learn more and sign up here👉astonsimmonds.com/recreate
@antoninaorlova2169 she's got a list of things. But for the most part, I didn't spend enough time with her. I prioritized things that were not important before her needs. I realized that too late.
When your boyfriend celebrated his ex’ 50th Birthday with a high-end heart necklace and didn’t celebrate our 10th Year Anniversary… what should I do????
When your partner continues to cross your boundaries, gaslights you, then does not take responsibility after asking them to stop that builds a lot of resentment
I appreciate you guys making this video. It was extremely helpful for me. I’ve been genuinely struggling with resentment with my partner recently and beating myself up over it. Self reflection and forgiveness has always been something I prided myself in but must’ve forgot along the way. Thank you guys.
This is it for me. I built resentment to the point of torching our relationship. Although too late now, it is finally freeing to understand this feeling 🙏
What do you do when your husband is emotionally abusive? How do you forgive that? It keeps happening over and over again. I can't keep letting him treat me that way!
Seems the issue could be illiteracy or unwillingness to read and comprehend the vow / terms or condition of the initial treaty. When a business contract counteroffer becomes null and void, its not usual for the two parties be maintaining business relations with no verbal or written agreement first. Intimate partnership agreements , a great deal of suffering and deadly risks for entire community and nation with violent ripple domino effect. Thanks for sharing your success and helping others with your time.
Perhaps instead of just saying the person holding resentment needs to move past it, just perhaps the person causing the resentment first needs to stop doing whatever it is that causes the resentment.
2-way street. If one who causes the resentment make change to be a better person from own mistake. The other should not keep bringing it up and onto the main discussion when they've changed. At that point, it is them who is holding onto baggages while the other acknowledged and made efforts to learn.
Both need to happen. The resented party isn't really given the space to show the resentful party they don't want to make them resentful anymore if the other person isn't giving them the chance because they can't let go of said resentment.
Basically, give them a chance.
If they aren't given a chance, they can't show you they've changed.
If they haven't changed, it will show itself soon again that way as well.
Thank you for this post ❤
This video has help me identify how to let go of resentment in my relationship.
Such a beautiful video ❤
I understand forgiving and letting go of pain and not holding on to what they did, but when is enough enough if they repeat the mistakes.
struggling with this too!
@@sarahgh5389 exactly, they fail to mention this one point. sure you can forgive, and let go of resentment. sure. sure. but what if it keeps happenning? That's when you have to draw the line, and move on.
Resentment can be what they have done to you
You said that right
That's why you need to forgive them
10:32 "You can not grow if you're not willing to let go" strongest words ever
What if you forgive and the behaviors that hurt you don’t change?
Then you leave. If you did the work to forgive them and move past your resentment but they‘re not putting in the work to change their hurtful behaviours, leave them. They WILL suffer your loss, believe me.
@@newyorkgirl1997heavy on it
How long did you take to let go of your resentments? I’m trying really hard to change too but there are certain qualities good or bad that made us, us. I feel like I’m spiraling downwards like you mentioned about Adam during your resentful phase.
This was probably the best and most cohesive video I have seen on this topic. I started with trying to understand how to forgive, because growing up I didn't have that role model to show me how in a healthy manner. I knew how to be the brightest person in the room, but could never understand how handle various emotions nor truly FEEL forgiveness in the overall situation until a couple months ago either. This idea of resentment isn't limited to romantic relationship, but by many other relationships in an individual's life. Your explanation truly has an articulate and all-encompassing aspect to it. Thank you so much for your insights.
it really is right? I'm in tears right now....searching for a way to help my wife
Wish I could of shown this video my ex 3 years ago! But if she never wanted to work on herself by herself you’re doomed from the start I suppose!
I hope this helps someone the way it did for me.
Jesus forgave those who wronged Him out of deep love and COMPASSION, even when He was unjustly treated.
❤ His forgiveness was rooted in His understanding of human weakness and His commitment to show mercy.
On the cross, Jesus famously prayed, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing" (Luke 23:34). This shows that even in the face of betrayal and suffering, Jesus chose to see the bigger picture-that people act out of ignorance, fear, or misguided intentions.
Jesus' example of forgiveness teaches that love and mercy are more powerful than anger or resentment.
He didn’t let the wrongs done to Him define His response, but instead, He chose forgiveness as a way to bring healing and reconciliation.
This act of forgiveness is central to His teachings and serves as an example of how we, too, can forgive, EVEN when it’s difficult.
Sorry but it seems like this woman is the problem…..the over use of your lips needs to be reduced and shared amongst your partner (just an fyi).
Also she didn’t hesitate to list all the issues he caused her but didn’t break down 1 item of herself.
We’re not perfect but I truly hope those who make these videos re-watch them.
But how? How do you forgive and choose to let go? I feel like I can say that then one month later I feel hurt all over again when I think of the past.
understand that your mind and the thinking isn’t who u are
Thank God for this video.....Im going through bitter resentment from my dear wife and I want to do all I can to help her and save our marriage.
Thanks so much for sharing @cdoublebeats733 and I’m so sorry to hear you’re dealing with some challenges in your relationship. Just know it is possible to turn things around. It wasn’t that long ago that we were experience a lot of resentment too. It did take learning a new way and taking really uncomfortable action though.
Our 4 week Recreate Your Relationship program would be perfect for what you’re currently experiencing. In just 4 weeks you’ll Discover The Simple & Easy 4 Step Proven Framework To Better Communication & Connection In Your Relationship! You can learn more and sign up here👉astonsimmonds.com/recreate
I am currently at this stage now and I thinking breaking up but at the same time i feel like I want to do something.
My wife just broke up with me because of resentment.
She just gave up on me even when I was making genuine changes she didn't believe me.
@@Bob-fh3yk What did she resent you for?
@antoninaorlova2169 she's got a list of things. But for the most part, I didn't spend enough time with her.
I prioritized things that were not important before her needs.
I realized that too late.
When your boyfriend celebrated his ex’ 50th Birthday with a high-end heart necklace and didn’t celebrate our 10th Year Anniversary… what should I do????
Thank you so much for this video. I needed to hear this for me and for my relationship with my wife.
Crap video. There are major misdeeds that partners do that cause deep seated resentment. Not "I don't like your accent"
Jeez let Adam talk 😂
Typical female. I'd resent never being able to talk.
When your partner continues to cross your boundaries, gaslights you, then does not take responsibility after asking them to stop that builds a lot of resentment
This was so good!
3:10
Such a perfect summary of what resentment is!
never
I appreciate you guys making this video. It was extremely helpful for me. I’ve been genuinely struggling with resentment with my partner recently and beating myself up over it. Self reflection and forgiveness has always been something I prided myself in but must’ve forgot along the way. Thank you guys.
This is it for me. I built resentment to the point of torching our relationship. Although too late now, it is finally freeing to understand this feeling 🙏
I don’t no how to for give her for diliberatly with holding stoping birth control to get pregnant
Such genuine share from you guys. Thank you
❤
Where do you go from here though? After forgiving all parties including yourself?.
So good. ❤
What if she does not want to forgive me or forgive herself for letting it happen?
Love how she used this video to enumerate all of his faults.. I expect he'll soon be making a video on "how to loose your ball and chain".
What do you do when your husband is emotionally abusive? How do you forgive that? It keeps happening over and over again. I can't keep letting him treat me that way!
Leave? You can't fix that. They have to fix that.
I'm so grateful for this video! Tysm
i don't know how to do things in this
Powerful
Hi! I absolutely love this video, one of the more helpful and relatable ones! I’d love to see a video about how to forgive
Hi @lillymoran1975, thanks for the feedback and great suggestion! ❤️
Thank you, I found it really useful.
Seems the issue could be illiteracy or unwillingness to read and comprehend the vow / terms or condition of the initial treaty. When a business contract counteroffer becomes null and void, its not usual for the two parties be maintaining business relations with no verbal or written agreement first. Intimate partnership agreements , a great deal of suffering and deadly risks for entire community and nation with violent ripple domino effect.
Thanks for sharing your success and helping others with your time.
How can I ask a question or get advice on this subject ☺️
Hi Danielle, feel free to ask me here and we may be able to cover it in a future video! ❤️