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@@karinodendaal5277 Yeah, we have all heard this cliché many times. Maybe, you think you figured out a way to not get hurt. Really, you have not thought it through. If you trust no one you cannot have love nor friendships. That leads to a very sad lonely life. Also, there are levels of trust that you give everyday. You trust that the food you get in restaurants is not poisoned. You trust that when you drive through a green light, other people are stopping at their red light. You are giving certain levels of trust all day long, Unless you live alone in woods somewhere, living off the land and off the grid. Since you are making comments on RUclips, I know that is not you. Living your best life, means learning discernment, on who is trustworthy, and how much trust to give when.
@@mick776gold I hear what you are saying. It is difficult to put into words the level of trust. I do not live in fear. I trust myself. I know who i am. I am a very content and happy single individual who loves life and sees challenges nothing more than opportunities. And I do trust, but never completely. Without any expectations or judgements are no disappointments.
My husband is such an amazing giver. We married young and have spent 41 years together. I am continually amazed at what a giver he is. Just tonight, he was mowing the lawn when I got home from work. I was on a work call that tarried on. He began making dinner. When I got off of the phone it was nearly done. I asked him how on earth he had the energy after working all day, then watching the grandchildren and followed by mowing the lawn, how he could have the energy left to make dinner…he replied as if he was surprised that I could even wonder.
I think men were made for it. Adam was taking care of all the plants and animals so he has the energy to work, nurture, and play whereas women are naturally overwhelmed by too much because Eve was made to simply keep him [in good] company…
@LorenaHarper good company also to encourage and support the man and to receive from the man. The attitude today is the opposite its "I don't need no man" and "that's what he's supposed to do for a queen" that's not encouraging nor receptive and that's what discourages a man. Always receive and always encourage and he'll continue to give
@@darts2428 The energy to support is different than being the one doing all the work. Not to say one is less important just saying God knew what He was doing when He architected us differently for different things… Idk people with the mentality you mentioned but I hear a lot of men say it… sounds like women are pre-overwhelmed 😂
You lucky but I can tell from your comment you appreciate everything your husband does and you tell him, that in itself is the key to a successful marriage.
@@Nishesquewell you knew that people who give trust without discernment will have a painful relationship. Don't curse others, with bad things. You don't know how the universe operates it will come back to you to teach you a lesson. So have some sense and compassion. Trust needs to be earned not everyone is trustworthy
You have to give trust, to earn trust. No o ne wants a relationship where their partner doesn't trust them. Whatever you put out you get back. THATS how the universe works.@@rene3759
So beautiful to read that ❤, I hope you guys can be happy as much as possible, wish you the best, very best in the world, may God bless you and give many more years 💕
Take over what? No woman goes “I would love to take care of that man for the rest of my life no matter what” For all that…you might as well be single. If the man can’t match your energy and it’s only you with the relationship burden on your shoulders then you might as well stay single . Why put up with all that drama.
@@Bri-nc8ypwomen do say that, even in the marriage vows. Women are also the ones who fight more to fix the marriages ie seeking personally or for the couple counselling, putting up with abuse Men are not taught how to live a woman and honor them too many have big egos, pride and lack of communication and emotional skills. This kinda of attitudes and behaviour destroy marriages. Not saying women are always perfect many women who also ruin their own marriages as well.
@@rene3759most women that leave marriages do so because they’re want to trade up, they lose attraction and affection towards their man. Let me guess you’re gnna say that it’s because the man wasn’t there emotionally 😂😂
At some point in the relationship-my man didn’t want to be a giver or a provider. He wanted that from me instead. All trust and security that I needed flew out the window and I wasn’t prepared to be the man in the relationship.
Hi, was it after he put you through some kind of professional school? Was it after he “kept” you? Because maybe he just needs some help now… Men don’t go from being givers to wanting to be a “kept” man. I’m curious to how yours is so exclusive ? If you care to share, that would be great! Much love
Im in 50’s and I’ve noticed since women are in the work force for economic reasons these men want to kick back… My friends husb successful Wall Street wanted to quit and become a dolphin trainer ( he doesn’t swim) U can’t make this stuff up. Welcome to 2024 everything is upside down 😖
@@UrDominioNread up on narcissist esp covert they love bomb you and switch it up. Fake everything… Many men do this few men are givers. Not with lifelong patriarchy in there DNA
Dam i dont agree that this applies to all relationships cause my man is so good with kids, n even tho he stay with a job. Im the bread winner and i love to spoil n give to him n kids. We dont feel no type of way as long as both put an equal amount of time and trust. But i do agree that the man is 100% the protector or it will feel unstable, and insecure
".... Constantly conscious of protecting yourself...". So well put! And I promise, surviving in this state of mind - because you are merely surviving, you are not living and definitely not thriving - will rob you of physical health, mental health, and emotional well-being EVERY single time!!!
As a 70 year old woman who learned the hard way, I support this message as pure truth!. When you are looking for a partner, look for someone who understands and accepts this.
I trust my husband…… because his trust is in God. That I can get behind and support 100000% Even if he gets knocked down… I know because he serves the almighty… he will get back up and get it right…. And I’ll be there to support him and cheer him on until he does … His heart is in the right place and his intentions are good. He’s worth all that and then some 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
I gwt it and completely understand it cause ive experienced both a man who provided exceptionally but his heart was cold. N i left that situation quick when i met a man with a good heart n pure intentions even tho i was now going to b main provider. 💯 completely worth it. I love it. Best decision i made in life
@@jioboy2676 Yeah, and men these days are just full of trust kindness, right? Why do you feel the need to bash women on multiple threads like you're doing? What are you trying to accomplish? Are you trying to show that men these days are hateful toward women? Because that's what you're doing.
I love your lessons, Rabbi. This particular one depicts what my marriage was, before I lost the love of my life through cancer. He continues to live in my heart and my loss is lessened by the indelible good memories he left with me. I wish that everyone who is getting married will have a marriage like I had, that is, like the one you are so wisely counseling about.
The younger generation sees how their father took care of their mothers and control ever aspects of her life to the point where she was miserable. When men say they will take care of a woman. He means because he provides she's his puppet. He controls the money and every thing.
We want to feel safe. When we feel safe our love and nurturing blooms like the most beautiful flower 🌺🌹 Took me a long time to find a man that could be the one 💖 lucky I found it
This is so true. Unfortunately so many marriages today are they other way around and it does nothing but build resentment and eventually will likely end in divorce.
And when the husband is the giver you want nothing else but show him you trust him. And he gives more . A beautiful circle I had for 45 years til he passed 😢❤
I cherish wisdom. When a man can feel that way it’s because she’s ready to receive she’s open . Women today are tied to past pains and are hurt and wounded . Healing is receiving. When we receive we open our emotions and authenticity , then he sees her. When she’s seeing herself this way he sees her also. A woman knows or should know she’s open and ready to receive , simply put she’s back into her natural state of being God made her to be . She’ll find a man who’s ready and has something to give . He’s made himself ready ahead of time by faith and vice versa. No other way , there’s only one way .
@@nomorecensoringme you cannot create a man who wants to take care of you. You have to find that. You also cannot create a woman who wants to follow a man. You have to find that kind of woman. Those type People Rabbi describing, unfortunately, are oh so Rare.
Good men and good women were always rare. Even in the past or worse inn the past people were shackled in marriage to monsters, particularly women when you consider their family selling them to the highest bidder not caring if she trusts the man or if the man will be kind to her
Truly spoken truly so Once the damage is done it’s hard to ever be the same again and sometimes a person has to hold back a piece of their heart because someone trampled it😢😢😢 And you can’t trust them again no matter how much you try and try
I have asked myself the same question. I think I can still believe and trust when I know that in his core in his soul and essence he does truly appreciate and respect and love and all I really need -he is truly is definitely trustworthy, it's only Marley a temporary failure to fulfill himself in reality but in his soul he truly do love you and when you give him that trust and understanding it gives him the strength to be his true goodness. Yes it's hard but it's the work of love that will create love again. Believe in his love and it will come back to you ❤
U can - every day you break the heart of God, and even in your best attempts, you are still disobedient to the wheel of God and God yet for forgives you and allows your life to continue for a new day. Genesis we are told that we are made in the image of God, so of course we can find healing from being let down from others just as God finds healing from being let down from us, and we can continue our relationship and grow the relationship and slowly, but surely we can learn to be more faithful in our relationships. And it’s not that we cannot forgive, and we cannot heal. It’s many times that we will not. It really is a form of obedience because God forgives us. We are told to forgive others, and we are also told in the Bible that if we do not forgive others, our prayers will be hindered. God bless you
@@user-ru8pp8qw6oI actually wrote down your post so I can read it as needed. This was definitely meant for me to see because i was wrestling with whether or not I can trust my husb due to bad decisions he's made. He's very hard on himself for his bad decisions. He feels like a failure,...which he's not. He does the best he can. We both want the best for each other. I have forgiven him and I pray he can forgive himself. You broke it down sooo well. Many thanks and sending much love ❤️❤
Listen to this man's wisdom. He knows how life works. People nowadays are inexperienced with life skills mastery, but they think they know better, yet they are miserable and constantly comparing themselves to others and competing to be younger, better looking, more successful, and so on. This is how you will feel happy and fulfilled, and when it's your time to die, you will die satisfied and at peace, and those who love you will be there until the end.
Thank you Rabbi! 😌 This feels good to hear and true to me - I wish for everybody, who also loves this message, that they find a fitting partner with good intentions. ❤ Listening to your wisdom, dear Rabbi Friedman, is very calming and comforting.
Yes. My ex, I loved him, but same.... He showed too much flirtiness...unfortunately, on English TV... they are encouraging 'sexually, much more open relationships '
In an epoch of time where these truths -or thoughts- are considered radical, they need shouted aloud more than ever. Family is disintegrating all around us, and we must shun this & hold on to our families, and SUPPORT our friends and communities to STAY & FIGHT for this intimacy. From a Son of Abraham of the Christian Tradition, my deepest heartfelt THANKS to you; I needed to hear this today. Hold Fast, Rabbi.
For some people, with trust comes forgiveness. My husb has made some bad decisions which broke a bit of trust. He was very hard on himself. He felt like a failure...which he is not. I forgave him and I pray he can forgive himself. We truly love each other and want the best for each other. If I asked for the moon, he would get it for me if he could.
My husband has always been a very generous provider. I trust him with my life. We have been together since I was 23yrars years old. We met in the spring of 1988 We respect, trust,and love each other
True. So true. First time I met my wife 18 years ago, this is how I felt. Unfortunately, today we are accused of being patriachal. But we are not going to give up. This is exactly what I am going to teach my children and every other young men and women who are willing to learn.
This rabbi is 100% correct. I love every word I’ve heard him say in this and other videos. I chuckle because I am a practicing cradle Catholic but could listen to this rabbi every day!
Better to walk away and find your own path in life even if it’s not the best thing to do sometimes. God always leads the way no matter what happends in life
G-d doesn't 'lead the way always no matter what happens in life'. Sounds like magic or something. If He did 'lead' we all would not make so many mistakes.
@@nomorecensoringme Also, mistakes are very useful for learning, especially regarding what not to do & why. So how do you know that people's mistakes aren't simply part of God's leading?
I agree with this... Providing isn't just financial but emotionally, physical and spiritual as well. When you give (provide for a woman) we naturally multiply. When this is out of balance all trouble seeps in.
U are so absolutely wise. I feel so blessed to have found your channel. God bless you for opening to the world and not only for Jewish people. Praise god for your faithfulness.
We're both givers in our marriage. I don't think anybody can give and provide a whole life without recieving. After around 10 years of our marriage my husband got seriously chronically ill. According to his logic, our marriage would end here, but we care for each other and walk through life together, each providing as much as we can.
The words you said for the man & the woman are EXACTLY what I told my ex. I also told him that he didn't know what true intimacy is. Wow this was so confirming. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for sharing this WISDOM ❤️💯🙏
I thought we had that. I trusted him completely, happily respected him and followed his lead for 13 years. Then I found out about all his secrets…💔 he’s repentant and seeking help/counseling, but I’m not sure how to trust again. At this point in my life I feel like the only I can truly trust is myself. 💔
It's so true! I don't trust my ex with my heart, my self-esteem, nothing. He really broke me down. I was no longer sharing how I felt about my dreams. He told me, I would fail at pursuing my dream. And even worse, he wanted it to be 50:50 and told me I should be submissive...sigh.
That’s why I got a divorce after 16 years of marriage because I couldn’t trust him I always felt like I was the giver .. it is not about money. He didn’t support emotionally.. and for that reason I couldn’t give him my heart and I felt like i needed to protect myself .. like he said it was a mess..
Been looking for this for so long. At a point in my life where I am going to get my education, grow closer to my faith, and letting life unfold before me and follow God's plan 🥰
@@jioboy2676 Then why don't women agree? You obviously don't care enough to even know what women think, yet you think you're some expert on them? If you can't find any good women, it's probably because YOU aren't a good man. But feel free to keep telling yourself whatever you like.
Real men are the provider,and real women make the most of what he provides. Men are supposed to love,protect, and shelter her from the cold ,evil, world. The woman is to provide a warm ,welcoming home,with dinner, and a clean orderly comfortable home to return to at the end of a long hard day. She is his reinforcement to face another rough day.
That's why he said, make the most of whatever he provides! She should struggle with the bare minimum even when she can contribute to the finances. But since the man wants hot and warm food on the table and a clean house to back from work to, a woman must let that thought of earning pass and get back to the kitchen. @@MsSandhu9
Truthfully Rabbi, they have the exact same role, just for different purposes. For the man, he is the provider of physical needs. A house, food, water, and safety. He is the protector from outside threats, such as someone or something that could potentially cause them or their family harm. For the woman, she is the provider of physical needs in a different way. Upkeep of the house, preparing the things to be eaten and drank, and a different kind of safety. She is the protector from inside threats such as someone or something that could cause them or their family emotional harm. She is the mans emotional safe place, because she holds the key to his heart. Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil All the days of her life. So I guess the same could and should be said for men... 🤷♀️ Who can find a virtuous husband? For his worth is far above diamonds. The heart of his wife safely trusts him; So she will have no lack of gain. He does her good and not evil All the days of his life. THAT is a marriage that will work. Indubitably. 👍
What? Hahahaha the worst tjing you can do as a man is opening ro your wife about all your worries and weaknesses, the next time youll argue, shell gonna bring it up
@@oranges557 If that is the case you didn't marry a "wife". You simply married a woman to fulfill your physical needs and pass your time. If you want a wife that is what you need to seek out and pursue. Whether single or already married. If you are single there are certain traits and characteristics about a woman that will reveal she is "wife material" for lack of better words. If you are married to a woman you wish to be your wife, you must find those characteristics and traits within her... Because she has them too. They are just buried beneath hurts from her past before she was with you. Those things make a woman feel OVER vulnerable which actually has the opposite effect of how it sounds. It is like taking a dog, pinning it down, and forcing it to expose its belly... All the time... To everyone... That feeling of forced vulnerability causes her to overreact to hurts that come from you, and to lash back in the only way she knows how. With her own words. Here is a hint on how to distinguish between the characteristics of a woman and a wife within a woman before marrying her... If she does those kinds of things before you get married... Gossips to you about people, says cruel things to or about others, treats others poorly... No matter how GOOD she treats you before you get married... Eventually that behavior WILL carry over into your relationship and your marriage. Take a closer and deeper look at the Proverbs 31 Woman. It lists all the characteristics of a wife, but to understand what you are looking for you can't just take the words that are written at face value. She must be AS a wife to you before she can become your actual wife. It is foolish to marry someone you don't trust, and leads to much heartache for both parties involved. And for those who have married a broken woman and wish to help her heal and transform into the the wife you are looking for... Forest Blakk is a man who has found a wife... His song, "If you love her" tells you everything you need to know.
Yep. My wife lied to me about meeting some other guy and ever since then the marriage has suffered for exactly the reasons he says. Lost trust. Can never get it back. Never.
Nice and starts this way. He better be able to trust her to care for him. Illness inevitably comes along. Both partners need to be strong on their own first.
The man’s role is to find the women, make her fall in love, provide, protect etc. do all the heavy lifting. Thanks but I already knew this intuitively from a very young age. When I do forget for a second society will be right there to remind me.
A man shall leave his mother and father and clieve to his wife, and they shall be bone of bone and flesh of flesh, the Hebrew word for bone is also essence, so a man and woman take on a new essence as a pair, being complete.
Men and woman are complete on their own. God doesn't make broken/incomplete things. Becoming new is becoming more. This does not mean the old version was incomplete or broken or lesser.
@rene3759 are you married? Have you studied Torah? Have you read the lectures of the sages? I ask because we seem to have different understanding. I am 77 and found my soul mate 61 years ago. I am complete with her and her with me. Together we are one. Just as Adam and Eve. My wife and I are not unique, I have observed many couples who exhibit the same attributes, just as the sages teach us. now I understand that you may not understand this or experience this, and so it is with many. Peace and blessings.
Trust is like the blood of a relationship. When it is gone, the relationship dies.
Trust no one.
@dcw863 and that I do unconditionally
@@karinodendaal5277 Yeah, we have all heard this cliché many times. Maybe, you think you figured out a way to not get hurt. Really, you have not thought it through. If you trust no one you cannot have love nor friendships. That leads to a very sad lonely life. Also, there are levels of trust that you give everyday. You trust that the food you get in restaurants is not poisoned. You trust that when you drive through a green light, other people are stopping at their red light. You are giving certain levels of trust all day long, Unless you live alone in woods somewhere, living off the land and off the grid. Since you are making comments on RUclips, I know that is not you. Living your best life, means learning discernment, on who is trustworthy, and how much trust to give when.
@@mick776gold
I hear what you are saying. It is difficult to put into words the level of trust. I do not live in fear. I trust myself. I know who i am. I am a very content and happy single individual who loves life and sees challenges nothing more than opportunities. And I do trust, but never completely. Without any expectations or judgements are no disappointments.
The rabbi is wrong here. Its the womens nature to raise the seed. To feed, grow and help.
My husband is such an amazing giver. We married young and have spent 41 years together. I am continually amazed at what a giver he is. Just tonight, he was mowing the lawn when I got home from work. I was on a work call that tarried on. He began making dinner. When I got off of the phone it was nearly done. I asked him how on earth he had the energy after working all day, then watching the grandchildren and followed by mowing the lawn, how he could have the energy left to make dinner…he replied as if he was surprised that I could even wonder.
I think men were made for it. Adam was taking care of all the plants and animals so he has the energy to work, nurture, and play whereas women are naturally overwhelmed by too much because Eve was made to simply keep him [in good] company…
@LorenaHarper good company also to encourage and support the man and to receive from the man. The attitude today is the opposite its "I don't need no man" and "that's what he's supposed to do for a queen" that's not encouraging nor receptive and that's what discourages a man. Always receive and always encourage and he'll continue to give
@@darts2428 The energy to support is different than being the one doing all the work. Not to say one is less important just saying God knew what He was doing when He architected us differently for different things… Idk people with the mentality you mentioned but I hear a lot of men say it… sounds like women are pre-overwhelmed 😂
I'd love to know more about your femininity on order for him to WANT to be the man for you! Please spill
You lucky but I can tell from your comment you appreciate everything your husband does and you tell him, that in itself is the key to a successful marriage.
My husband said this before. He said he wants to take care of me for the rest of his life. Which is very sweet.
And how did you respond??
How long till you get bored?
Only sweet?
Wonderful.
Red pill
For me, the foundation of any relationship is respect. Without it everything else easily crumbles into the sinking sand.
To have trust,one must be trustworthy.
True
Well we know what sort of extremely short relationship you’re going to have 👀
@@Nishesque good. we are releievd already
@@Nishesquewell you knew that people who give trust without discernment will have a painful relationship. Don't curse others, with bad things. You don't know how the universe operates it will come back to you to teach you a lesson. So have some sense and compassion. Trust needs to be earned not everyone is trustworthy
You have to give trust, to earn trust. No o ne wants a relationship where their partner doesn't trust them. Whatever you put out you get back. THATS how the universe works.@@rene3759
💯🎯 My husband and I have been together for 42 years because of trusting eachother!
That's awesome!
God bless your Union!!!❤❤
God blessed generation of yours now is all ruined as u know😂😂😂😂😂😂
So beautiful to read that ❤, I hope you guys can be happy as much as possible, wish you the best, very best in the world, may God bless you and give many more years 💕
This hits hard. When a man doesn't do those things; then the woman has to take over. Trust is essential. Being dead inside...is heartbreaking.
Take over what?
No woman goes “I would love to take care of that man for the rest of my life no matter what”
For all that…you might as well be single. If the man can’t match your energy and it’s only you with the relationship burden on your shoulders then you might as well stay single . Why put up with all that drama.
Being dead inside this line is truly fits I every woman
@@Bri-nc8ypwomen do say that, even in the marriage vows. Women are also the ones who fight more to fix the marriages ie seeking personally or for the couple counselling, putting up with abuse
Men are not taught how to live a woman and honor them too many have big egos, pride and lack of communication and emotional skills. This kinda of attitudes and behaviour destroy marriages. Not saying women are always perfect many women who also ruin their own marriages as well.
@@rene3759most women that leave marriages do so because they’re want to trade up, they lose attraction and affection towards their man.
Let me guess you’re gnna say that it’s because the man wasn’t there emotionally 😂😂
@@heisenburg8608sorry this has been your experience. It hasn't been in mine or most of the women I've talked with.
He is 100% correct - married 25 years
Wishing you another 25 years 💜
You are a very lucky man, but I bet you work at it everyday to go that extra mile to make each happy.
I really need to ask you something
@@susannaroseschaferthat’s the only way. And both sides don’t understand that in todays time
I'm not providing right now, and she is doubting me. Just going through a hard time.
At some point in the relationship-my man didn’t want to be a giver or a provider. He wanted that from me instead. All trust and security that I needed flew out the window and I wasn’t prepared to be the man in the relationship.
Same
Hi, was it after he put you through some kind of professional school? Was it after he “kept” you? Because maybe he just needs some help now… Men don’t go from being givers to wanting to be a “kept” man.
I’m curious to how yours is so exclusive ? If you care to share, that would be great! Much love
Im in 50’s and I’ve noticed since women are in the work force for economic reasons these men want to kick back… My friends husb successful Wall Street wanted to quit and become a dolphin trainer ( he doesn’t swim) U can’t make this stuff up. Welcome to 2024 everything is upside down 😖
@@UrDominioNread up on narcissist esp covert they love bomb you and switch it up. Fake everything… Many men do this few men are givers. Not with lifelong patriarchy in there DNA
Dam i dont agree that this applies to all relationships cause my man is so good with kids, n even tho he stay with a job. Im the bread winner and i love to spoil n give to him n kids. We dont feel no type of way as long as both put an equal amount of time and trust. But i do agree that the man is 100% the protector or it will feel unstable, and insecure
".... Constantly conscious of protecting yourself...".
So well put! And I promise, surviving in this state of mind - because you are merely surviving, you are not living and definitely not thriving - will rob you of physical health, mental health, and emotional well-being EVERY single time!!!
I pray that I'll meet someone with that kind of love and trust someday 💗 🙏🙏🙏
😪😪😪LORD have mercy on all of us that didnt have this as our experience
🕊
My God I was thinking the same thing..because it's happened to me many times before. 😢
❤️🙏🏼❤️
😢❤
@@ChristineMallo922😢😢😢😢 me too, victim of abuse and TOXIC monster..
@@lisacranmer8005im sorry to hear that. But im happy we made it!! :) We're survivors!
Peace to you dear! ✌
This is so true. How I stumbled into a marriage with such a man 15 years ago is is nothing short of a miracle.
Amen
Amen
Many blessings to you both!❤❤
She says she stumbled, doesn’t sound like she has a lot of confidence in deserving it? Much love
As a 70 year old woman who learned the hard way, I support this message as pure truth!. When you are looking for a partner, look for someone who understands and accepts this.
10 years in with my wife. No lying. No bullshit. Complete trust and love.
I’m so glad I found this Rabbi. He is spot on with his advise.
I trust my husband…… because his trust is in God. That I can get behind and support 100000% Even if he gets knocked down… I know because he serves the almighty… he will get back up and get it right…. And I’ll be there to support him and cheer him on until he does … His heart is in the right place and his intentions are good.
He’s worth all that and then some 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
True, true😊
I gwt it and completely understand it cause ive experienced both a man who provided exceptionally but his heart was cold. N i left that situation quick when i met a man with a good heart n pure intentions even tho i was now going to b main provider. 💯 completely worth it. I love it. Best decision i made in life
this is good! Thank you for this summary and reminder!
Trust , kindness and safety is everything. Thank you for your deep wisdoms & enlightened work in our world Rabbi.
Yeah nice when you give it out then terrible when ypi get nothing back
All those 3 are rare now a days in women in today's generation
@@jioboy2676
Yeah, and men these days are just full of trust kindness, right?
Why do you feel the need to bash women on multiple threads like you're doing? What are you trying to accomplish? Are you trying to show that men these days are hateful toward women? Because that's what you're doing.
@@jioboy2676 You attract what you are.
@@baracus1884 Not True... I have seen many contradictory examples of what u said
This is the message society needs now
Yes, yes and yes.
I wish I had a mentor like this in my life growing up and that I was wise enough to follow his words..
Man has to be the giver!! I ❤ that!!
Rabbi. Your wisdom is overwhelming. Thank you Rabbi.
This is not wisdom. It's all subjective and he is presenting is opinion as fact. It's bull.
so beautifully put!! wow
Exactly how I feel when I meet my wife, after 7 years I still feel the same way.
Complete trust and unconditional love
Thank you Rabbi Friedman for this teaching. Blessings to you.
I love your lessons, Rabbi. This particular one depicts what my marriage was, before I lost the love of my life through cancer. He continues to live in my heart and my loss is lessened by the indelible good memories he left with me. I wish that everyone who is getting married will have a marriage like I had, that is, like the one you are so wisely counseling about.
Thank you Rabbi. I hope the younger generation is listening to this.
This is what makes a great relationship.
Listen and learn kids.
The younger generation sees how their father took care of their mothers and control ever aspects of her life to the point where she was miserable. When men say they will take care of a woman. He means because he provides she's his puppet. He controls the money and every thing.
Thank you for the light Rabbi...😢❤
Man is
We want to feel safe. When we feel safe our love and nurturing blooms like the most beautiful flower 🌺🌹
Took me a long time to find a man that could be the one 💖 lucky I found it
This is so true. Unfortunately so many marriages today are they other way around and it does nothing but build resentment and eventually will likely end in divorce.
And when the husband is the giver you want nothing else but show him you trust him. And he gives more . A beautiful circle I had for 45 years til he passed 😢❤
I cherish wisdom. When a man can feel that way it’s because she’s ready to receive she’s open . Women today are tied to past pains and are hurt and wounded . Healing is receiving. When we receive we open our emotions and authenticity , then he sees her. When she’s seeing herself this way he sees her also. A woman knows or should know she’s open and ready to receive , simply put she’s back into her natural state of being God made her to be . She’ll find a man who’s ready and has something to give . He’s made himself ready ahead of time by faith and vice versa. No other way , there’s only one way .
So true. Never found it, but happy for those that have! A blessing to know! 🙏
We create it, not 'find it'.
@@nomorecensoringme you cannot create a man who wants to take care of you. You have to find that. You also cannot create a woman who wants to follow a man. You have to find that kind of woman. Those type People Rabbi describing, unfortunately, are oh so Rare.
Me too
Me too I am every happy for people who find true happiness but not so lucky myself.
Good men and good women are rare nowadays
Good men and good women were always rare. Even in the past or worse inn the past people were shackled in marriage to monsters, particularly women when you consider their family selling them to the highest bidder not caring if she trusts the man or if the man will be kind to her
Also think of it like this give your woman a house she'll give you a home give your woman your true love she'll give you a family. She multipli
Truly spoken truly so
Once the damage is done it’s hard to ever be the same again and sometimes a person has to hold back a piece of their heart because someone trampled it😢😢😢
And you can’t trust them again no matter how much you try and try
I have asked myself the same question. I think I can still believe and trust when I know that in his core in his soul and essence he does truly appreciate and respect and love and all I really need -he is truly is definitely trustworthy, it's only Marley a temporary failure to fulfill himself in reality but in his soul he truly do love you and when you give him that trust and understanding it gives him the strength to be his true goodness.
Yes it's hard but it's the work of love that will create love again. Believe in his love and it will come back to you ❤
U can - every day you break the heart of God, and even in your best attempts, you are still disobedient to the wheel of God and God yet for forgives you and allows your life to continue for a new day. Genesis we are told that we are made in the image of God, so of course we can find healing from being let down from others just as God finds healing from being let down from us, and we can continue our relationship and grow the relationship and slowly, but surely we can learn to be more faithful in our relationships. And it’s not that we cannot forgive, and we cannot heal. It’s many times that we will not. It really is a form of obedience because God forgives us. We are told to forgive others, and we are also told in the Bible that if we do not forgive others, our prayers will be hindered. God bless you
@@user-ru8pp8qw6oI actually wrote down your post so I can read it as needed. This was definitely meant for me to see because i was wrestling with whether or not I can trust my husb due to bad decisions he's made. He's very hard on himself for his bad decisions. He feels like a failure,...which he's not. He does the best he can. We both want the best for each other. I have forgiven him and I pray he can forgive himself. You broke it down sooo well. Many thanks and sending much love ❤️❤
Love is the highest value, and its foundation is truth and trust.
And you magically attain this at the age of 20-odd with precious little life experience and no sex B4 marriage
I lost trust in my husband when he was sick and. Had to protect myself. Sad when I realized I never had too.
100 % factual !
Listen to this man's wisdom. He knows how life works. People nowadays are inexperienced with life skills mastery, but they think they know better, yet they are miserable and constantly comparing themselves to others and competing to be younger, better looking, more successful, and so on. This is how you will feel happy and fulfilled, and when it's your time to die, you will die satisfied and at peace, and those who love you will be there until the end.
The more you trust, the more love and abundance flows between you both.
Thank you Rabbi! 😌
This feels good to hear and true to me - I wish for everybody, who also loves this message, that they find a fitting partner with good intentions. ❤
Listening to your wisdom, dear Rabbi Friedman, is very calming and comforting.
Truth! My husband has a sex addition and was very sexually coercive. Trusting his touch is something I can’t do anymore 🥺
Yes. My ex, I loved him, but same....
He showed too much flirtiness...unfortunately, on English TV... they are encouraging 'sexually, much more open relationships '
That is so sad. Praying you heal from this. ❤ I pray he will leave this addiction.
And why exactly did you marry a man like that?
@@karenjohnson5634Hallelujah Amen
Have you told him this?
100% true let go back to basics! When marriages actually lasted!❤️
In an epoch of time where these truths -or thoughts- are considered radical, they need shouted aloud more than ever. Family is disintegrating all around us, and we must shun this & hold on to our families, and SUPPORT our friends and communities to STAY & FIGHT for this intimacy. From a Son of Abraham of the Christian Tradition, my deepest heartfelt THANKS to you; I needed to hear this today.
Hold Fast, Rabbi.
For some people, with trust comes forgiveness. My husb has made some bad decisions which broke a bit of trust. He was very hard on himself. He felt like a failure...which he is not. I forgave him and I pray he can forgive himself. We truly love each other and want the best for each other. If I asked for the moon, he would get it for me if he could.
Thank you to the IGTK team for all you do to share the teachings of Rabbi Friedman with us. Blessings to you all.
What is IGTK
@@dawnketcham3965 it's Good To Know
My husband has always been a very generous provider.
I trust him with my life.
We have been together since I was 23yrars years old. We met in the spring of 1988
We respect, trust,and love each other
Trust, Respect & Kindness❤❤❤
Care for her or control her... Theres a fine line! 💜
I love and respect you sir for what you told, the world we live in has forgot the roles 🙏🏻🙏🏻
True. So true. First time I met my wife 18 years ago, this is how I felt. Unfortunately, today we are accused of being patriachal. But we are not going to give up. This is exactly what I am going to teach my children and every other young men and women who are willing to learn.
Just described my ex wife.... wasted 20yrs of my life caring and supporting a woman with hidden plans!
This rabbi is 100% correct. I love every word I’ve heard him say in this and other videos. I chuckle because I am a practicing cradle Catholic but could listen to this rabbi every day!
Truth is truth 💯 🎉
Better to walk away and find your own path in life even if it’s not the best thing to do sometimes. God always leads the way no matter what happends in life
G-d doesn't 'lead the way always no matter what happens in life'. Sounds like magic or something. If He did 'lead' we all would not make so many mistakes.
@@nomorecensoringme you have to walk with the lord then you will truly understand 🙏🏽✝️
@@nomorecensoringme
Man's failure to follow does NOT mean that God doesn't lead.
@@nomorecensoringme
Also, mistakes are very useful for learning, especially regarding what not to do & why. So how do you know that people's mistakes aren't simply part of God's leading?
@@nomorecensoringmeGod gives us Free Will. Some allow God to lead, some don't.❤❤
I agree with this... Providing isn't just financial but emotionally, physical and spiritual as well. When you give (provide for a woman) we naturally multiply. When this is out of balance all trouble seeps in.
From a Muslim woman, thank you for your blessed advice 🙏
Love this guy. Speaking facts. REMEMBER THIS!!! TRUST MUST BE EARNED AND EARNED AND EARNED ...DAILY....
You got to trust each other completely.
U are so absolutely wise. I feel so blessed to have found your channel. God bless you for opening to the world and not only for Jewish people. Praise god for your faithfulness.
Yes, it is a mess. You never feel settled or at peace.
And there is resentment..😢
We're both givers in our marriage. I don't think anybody can give and provide a whole life without recieving.
After around 10 years of our marriage my husband got seriously chronically ill. According to his logic, our marriage would end here, but we care for each other and walk through life together, each providing as much as we can.
Thank you Rabbi! Where there is not trust. You have to protect yourself. The 🏠 divide against itself, can't stand!
The words you said for the man & the woman are EXACTLY what I told my ex. I also told him that he didn't know what true intimacy is. Wow this was so confirming. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for sharing this WISDOM ❤️💯🙏
That is absolutely the truth. I wish I had that.
Only a few people have this chance I feel likr 😢
I thought we had that. I trusted him completely, happily respected him and followed his lead for 13 years. Then I found out about all his secrets…💔 he’s repentant and seeking help/counseling, but I’m not sure how to trust again. At this point in my life I feel like the only I can truly trust is myself. 💔
Agreed!And when we trust we must not betray that trust!😊
Trust is the key to a happy marriage. Both husband and wife are supposed to trust each other for a happy and lasting relationship.
TRUST IS THE KEY 🔑 ❤️
It's amazing how spot-on he is
That's fine, as long as it doesn't mean the woman submits. You can back someone without losing sight of yourself.
In biblical terms it does indeed mean that. Wives are to submit to their husbands and husbands are to love their wives.
It's so true! I don't trust my ex with my heart, my self-esteem, nothing. He really broke me down. I was no longer sharing how I felt about my dreams. He told me, I would fail at pursuing my dream. And even worse, he wanted it to be 50:50 and told me I should be submissive...sigh.
I needed to hear this today. Thank you.
That’s why I got a divorce after 16 years of marriage because I couldn’t trust him I always felt like I was the giver .. it is not about money. He didn’t support emotionally.. and for that reason I couldn’t give him my heart and I felt like i needed to protect myself .. like he said it was a mess..
Been looking for this for so long. At a point in my life where I am going to get my education, grow closer to my faith, and letting life unfold before me and follow God's plan 🥰
Trust is such a precious word and it 's very difficult to follow but make us good when it's to be followed ❤
And trust is so difficult to earn back because it just means you have to put forth more effort than the first time and most can’t commit to it
To feel that for a woman is rare and i believe in it with the woman i have now
To feel that with a man is rare too once upon a lifetime if you are lucky
@@rosameijering5161 Its more the case with woman now a days
@@jioboy2676
It's really not. The fact that you think that just shows that you have no clue what women think.
@@JJ-yc2sv Its really is...your denying wont change any Fact
@@jioboy2676
Then why don't women agree? You obviously don't care enough to even know what women think, yet you think you're some expert on them? If you can't find any good women, it's probably because YOU aren't a good man. But feel free to keep telling yourself whatever you like.
Lost my love. He died. Not far behind. Truthful, faithful.
Real men are the provider,and real women make the most of what he provides. Men are supposed to love,protect, and shelter her from the cold ,evil, world.
The woman is to provide a warm ,welcoming home,with dinner, and a clean orderly comfortable home to return to at the end of a long hard day. She is his reinforcement to face another rough day.
You mean to say she shouldn't work? Even if his salary is not enough?
That's why he said, make the most of whatever he provides! She should struggle with the bare minimum even when she can contribute to the finances. But since the man wants hot and warm food on the table and a clean house to back from work to, a woman must let that thought of earning pass and get back to the kitchen. @@MsSandhu9
Some wise words there. Trust and communication being able to talk to each other and share each othets dreams . 🌸
Thank you Sir.Amen😊
Intimacy is trust and the basis of love. ❤️🔥
Such wisdom! Exactly.
Amen! Beautifully said and so blessed and thankful for you and this and all you do. Moshiach now and thank you truly!
This feels good to hear! ♥️
My wife and I have has this relationship for over 20 years. It's nice to get affirmation on how we've treated each other.
Truthfully Rabbi, they have the exact same role, just for different purposes.
For the man, he is the provider of physical needs. A house, food, water, and safety. He is the protector from outside threats, such as someone or something that could potentially cause them or their family harm.
For the woman, she is the provider of physical needs in a different way. Upkeep of the house, preparing the things to be eaten and drank, and a different kind of safety.
She is the protector from inside threats such as someone or something that could cause them or their family emotional harm. She is the mans emotional safe place, because she holds the key to his heart.
Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.
The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
So I guess the same could and should be said for men... 🤷♀️
Who can find a virtuous husband?
For his worth is far above diamonds.
The heart of his wife safely trusts him;
So she will have no lack of gain.
He does her good and not evil
All the days of his life.
THAT is a marriage that will work.
Indubitably. 👍
What? Hahahaha the worst tjing you can do as a man is opening ro your wife about all your worries and weaknesses, the next time youll argue, shell gonna bring it up
@@oranges557 If that is the case you didn't marry a "wife". You simply married a woman to fulfill your physical needs and pass your time.
If you want a wife that is what you need to seek out and pursue. Whether single or already married.
If you are single there are certain traits and characteristics about a woman that will reveal she is "wife material" for lack of better words.
If you are married to a woman you wish to be your wife, you must find those characteristics and traits within her...
Because she has them too. They are just buried beneath hurts from her past before she was with you.
Those things make a woman feel OVER vulnerable which actually has the opposite effect of how it sounds.
It is like taking a dog, pinning it down, and forcing it to expose its belly... All the time... To everyone...
That feeling of forced vulnerability causes her to overreact to hurts that come from you, and to lash back in the only way she knows how.
With her own words.
Here is a hint on how to distinguish between the characteristics of a woman and a wife within a woman before marrying her...
If she does those kinds of things before you get married... Gossips to you about people, says cruel things to or about others, treats others poorly...
No matter how GOOD she treats you before you get married... Eventually that behavior WILL carry over into your relationship and your marriage.
Take a closer and deeper look at the Proverbs 31 Woman. It lists all the characteristics of a wife, but to understand what you are looking for you can't just take the words that are written at face value.
She must be AS a wife to you before she can become your actual wife. It is foolish to marry someone you don't trust, and leads to much heartache for both parties involved.
And for those who have married a broken woman and wish to help her heal and transform into the the wife you are looking for...
Forest Blakk is a man who has found a wife...
His song, "If you love her" tells you everything you need to know.
Gods rule of law is written in our hearts. Praise the Lord!
The constant self-protection is also exhausting. 😢
So true, thank you for such wisdom. Wishing you all healthy and loving relationships. You all deserve it, wishing you all well ❤.
Yep. My wife lied to me about meeting some other guy and ever since then the marriage has suffered for exactly the reasons he says. Lost trust. Can never get it back. Never.
U had every reason to man
Definitely, man who is responsible, provider, caring, dutiful n of course loyal too, woman willingly dedicate herself to him undoubtedly. Thanks 😊
Parents, help raise your boys to be real men.
And women as real women
There is alot respect trust in a man who would voice that a woman would be released from any anxiety fears it would be a safe haven of love
Nice and starts this way. He better be able to trust her to care for him. Illness inevitably comes along. Both partners need to be strong on their own first.
The man’s role is to find the women, make her fall in love, provide, protect etc. do all the heavy lifting. Thanks but I already knew this intuitively from a very young age. When I do forget for a second society will be right there to remind me.
Its something so pure in that!
Thank you for your advice ❤ I had the wrong concept ❤ thank you for explaining that wanting to take care of the man I loved was a wrong concept 💫
A man shall leave his mother and father and clieve to his wife, and they shall be bone of bone and flesh of flesh, the Hebrew word for bone is also essence, so a man and woman take on a new essence as a pair, being complete.
Men and woman are complete on their own. God doesn't make broken/incomplete things. Becoming new is becoming more. This does not mean the old version was incomplete or broken or lesser.
@rene3759 are you married? Have you studied Torah? Have you read the lectures of the sages?
I ask because we seem to have different understanding.
I am 77 and found my soul mate 61 years ago. I am complete with her and her with me. Together we are one. Just as Adam and Eve.
My wife and I are not unique, I have observed many couples who exhibit the same attributes, just as the sages teach us.
now I understand that you may not understand this or experience this, and so it is with many. Peace and blessings.