Same! There was one time when my friend at that party was hanging out with a boy (that I actually hate, so I was quite angry with her because I've told her that that boy is a mess) so I was basically alone taking care of another friend who was crazy drunk and sobbing. It was such a mess.
I get jealous of the extroverts at the party who are totally enjoying themselves, laughing, chatting, dancing, being free. I'm standing there observing it all and wishing i could be free and enjoy.
That means you are shy not introvert.... because introvert is kinda nature of human that love isolation from being in noise or interacting with people....😊.....you are jealous for not attending the crowd means you are shy type person.....not introvert ❤️
***** The realization that you can't both have friends and also ditch them when they want to hang out with you? Obviously there are more ways to socialize than at parties, but you can't realistically expect to be able to keep declining someone's invitations and still keep your social ties with them. This is precisely one of the significant dilemmas of socialization that introverts have. If you just plain don't want any friends that will end up inviting you to parties then you aren't a demographic this is even concerned about.
Vulcapyro "but you can't realistically expect to be able to keep declining someone's invitations and still keep your social ties with them" Unless they are worth being called friends and understand that not everyone is like them and aren't being a douche about it. The rest, I can live without comfortably. There is a difference between big party and small gathering.
tinkerwithstuff Took the words out of my mouth, eh fingers. A true friend will understand if asking you to go to a party is like asking if you want a colonoscopy.
That works 9 out of 10 times. Some parties you can't avoid without some serious egg on your face. IE a relative's bar mitzvah , wedding etc. It being family would make it easier though, because you know everyone there and remember at least half their names (in my case). This is good advice for when it's unavoidable.
Im confused, are you talking about sovling a problem or... how do you avoid it while............. not avoiding it? (maby easy for most bot nor for some.. thing like me...)
I’m so terrified of social interaction that it’s affecting essential parts of my everyday life. I’m in college and if you don’t go to parties or don’t hang out with your classmates after class, you get left behind. You never have a project partner, you get bad grades, you finally graduate with zero connections and then this miserable circle follows you into the real world when you have to find work. It’s a never ending cycle of crapiness and I wish I never had become an introvert.
I feel very similar to your feelings.High School and college were the worst of times.I usually found a few friends who were not that outgoing and we got drunk to stop feeling like we didn't fit in.Now that I am in the work world, I chose the wrong career for an introvert, wasted many years.We are supposed to be very creative, right now I am wanting to create a better income for myself.Being an introvert in the USA is no fun at all.If I had a ton of money I would move to some remote place in the Arizona desert, buy a large area of land, and only socialize with other introverts.
bloo jkl45 grades and social interaction don’t correlate stop making excuses for your life. I often find that the classes I don’t speak to people in, I concentrate and do better in. Just introduce yourself to someone, start a friendly conversation- it’s really not that hard.
You have not "become" an introvert, you're born this way like lady gaga sings. Introverts are great leaders! And there are many introverts leading the world. People like Barack Obama, elon musk, Marilyn Monroe and many more people are all introverts. I know it sucks cause I am kinda in the same situation. But I'm sure it's all gonna work out
I remember sometimes I would get told at parties why am I so shy or so quiet, and I would have to be nice and say politely 'I don't know'. But in my head my response was 'I DON'T LIKE WASTING WORDS'.
+Ben Montes I know your struggle except that I'm in college and those who I speak with always ask me why I don't talk or do the stuff they do and then they go about telling me how I should be and I'm like if there's nothing important to talk about there's no need to speak.and then it goes on every single day.
I'm also in college, and one of the reasons why I stopped going to parties is because I would sometimes feel like I'm trying too hard to blend in the environment or I simply felt I didn't belong so I got more involved with clubs and other things.
I understand this cuz we’re in quarantine now and eveyone is like “I wanna go out and do something” but I’m fine in quarantine. I’m just not the type of person who likes to go out a lot. Yeah it’s sometimes boring and I have nothing to do but I’m not desperate to see friends and that😂
Bad advice. Extroverts tend to take advantage of things without even realizing it. Introverts getting drunk will be exposed and humiliated. Introvert wakes up the next day, and finds out that gossip about them getting smashed has spread like wildfire is hell on earth.
+CarsonFacePalmer i know. Human is an animal that belongs to a group. So if you cant not be awkward and talk to people why the fuck you call yourself a human. Funniest part is that most introverts are proud of being one, which is so plainly stupid
Hey, the most important thing is it is ok now. You survived that and hopefully for a long time you will be spared of such events. Have some good tea (or beverage of your choice) and enjoy a good time of just relaxing:) Parties are an awful way of spending time anyway.
Aww, I know that feeling.. Maybe you can try going with a semi-extroverted friend who'll keep you socialised and safe at the same time, or at least a really sympathetic friend or fellow introvert..
Just don't think about the fear. Loosen up, grab a glass, smile a little and do as if you are very content with yourself. Before you know it people will be flocking around you!
get a Doc to prescribe you some klonopin. I remember back when I had panic attacks sooo bad and the only way I could make it through parties etc..Was to take 1mg of Klonopin, smoke a bowl, ( weed..some headdies), and have a beer. But that was 10 yrs ago and Im no longer like that. But I still hate parties.
When there's noone home, i really enjoy it. I can do whatever i want, it's quite, peaceful, and just relaxing. I don't get bored as i have plenty of different stuff to do. And yes, i do have (a) friend(s), but i usually only hang out with one.
Being an introvert is easy, realizing it was hard. When I read Quiet by Susan Cain a bunch of stuff fell into place. I'd advise anybody to read it, even extroverts can learn something from it, like that it isn't just something you can turn off. You can hide it but you can not turn it off. I just wish the business world would stop focusing on extroversion. I swear going to job fairs at my university was one of the most stressful things I have ever done, and interviews were really stressful as well because we're taught that the interviewer wants a conversation , and as an introvert you want to be anywhere but there. Doesn't matter that I had a really high GPA, understood what was needed from me, and willing to work for it because I could not keep the extroverted interviewer's interest.... Sorry went on a rant there. After failing to land a job in my major's vocation, I've been thinking that universities need to work with employers in promoting all personalities.
Erick K that book is ace! I am an extrovert who means to wards introversion- I like parties but I will retreat after a while to be by myself and me only ☺
I'm ordering this book. Thank you. I forgot who I was, dealing with extroverts just to get a damn paycheck. You and this video just reminded me, I am an AWESOME introvert with a lot to contribute to the world in my own quiet way. :-)
Employers want people who can handle social situations and work well in groups, because skills needed for a job can be taught, working well among people on the other hand cannot be.
"introverts have to go to parties and do small talk" hell no I've never went to a party in my whole life and never will, screw social interactions I'm staying home eating cake and playing games
I am an extreme introvert. I cherish my time alone more so than being with others. I'd rather stay home and read a book, watch my favorite show, or listen to music alone in my room than be out with friends at a party. I feel comfortable with a small number of people. Two, three, four at the max. I get nervous meeting new people. I'd rather have no friends than go through the awkwardness of meeting new ones. That's just how we are :)
This is stupid. Don't force yourself to going to a party if you don't want to. Stay home and do whatever you want. But if you actually find yourself on a party, you don't need any escape plans, just say you already want to go home and go home. Don't force yourself to play by their rules, this is exactly why there are so many depressed introverts that think there is something wrong with them. Try to explain to your friends how you feel, if they really are you friends, then they will understand, if not, then they are not worth it. Sigh
None of my friends seem to understand. Especially since I'm a college student. It's "normal" to go to parties, concerts, be in clubs, and just always know what's going on on or off campus. College is too extrovert centric which is why I've been having such an awful time.
diradosveta TOP 10 CZ Erm, this doesn't work for everyone... Sometimes you HAVE to go, as said on the beginning. And I for example don't have the courage to tell someone I don't want to be there and want to go home, even if they're my friends/family, it's not that easy. So excuses are safer for me.
I was playing with a a cat when a big family party LOL Must of them just dancing, playing basketball(I don't hate basketball), and singing Most of them are EXTROVERTS !, THEY'RE absurd and they love mundane normy stuff
Last time I went to a party every conversation I had died in 30 seconds flat. I get so nervous I can't think and people must sense it. I feel like I repel people. It makes me kind of hate extroverts.
or you're just bad in conversations, or you look ugly. you can watch videos about how to start converstation, how to continue it, how to get friends etc. etc.
... I had that very same problem here's what you do... ask.alot.of.questions... everyone and I mean EVERYONE is narcissistic and love to talk about themselves... questions like so what do you do? have you lived here long? how are you finding the hors d'oeuvres? (depends on type of party don't ask this on a casual setting) this stupid little questions like that are an abomination for both of us... because we don't give a damn... (or at least I don't) but... it will keep them talking for hours... here's a list on topics you can ask about: fashion music art literature video games relation to EVERYONE at the party TV shows EVERYTHING ELSE!!! with the exception of: topics to avoid Politics religion that is it... good luck...
For some reason it sounds like being introvert is bad. But to me it's not. I can only talk about my experience, but maybe you can relate. I might not be someone to talk a lot, but if participating in a conversation I tend to focus more on the content. I am actually always expecting my opposite to say something of value and I am eager to extract that very knowledge my conversation partner tries to convey. However, that's exactly why small talks turns me off so much. It appears bland, unnecessary and mildly treacherous. That's probably why innitiating a conversation in the first place feels so odd. There is in fact no particular reason to talk to someone you don't know unless of course you need help. But on a party you are literally just killing time trying to have fun. And forcing yourself to have fun is counterproductive. I don't mean to generalize this, but if there is something I hate about extroverts it is their superficiality. Some People should slow down their need to talk and instead listen more carefully, because that's how you "look up" the facts. From what I've learned in my 21 years of life, it is that miscommunication is one of humanites greatest problems.
ooh i can't stand those people who are just talking all the time and not even trying to listen to other people. It's even worse when two persons of this kind talk to each other, because it looks like they're talking to a wall ,if you know what i mean :) sometimes it seems to me that throughout our entire lives we're trying to make somebody listen to us, but at the same time we don't listen to others hope you get my point
Kate Wonder Ohh I can relate to that so much. It feels bad when someone doesn't even wait for your anser. Mostly I just keep nodding in that case while thinking: "Congratz bro here is your prize I approve your talk with a special badge crafted only to suite your chest" The funny thing is, many people like me for just doing that - listening. They seem to think I sucked up everything they said, without waiting for my response. One more thing referring to: "...when two persons of this kind talk to each other, because it looks like they're talking to a wall" If there is some sort of excitement coming up in a conversation there are those moments somtimes. I am just craving for the right words and stay silent for a while, thinking of the right formulation to get my point across. But that seems to turn off many people, they intuitively try to fill this void. As if they would prefer a talk thats similar to a sound track being played over an actually interactive and reactive talk.
>It feels bad when someone doesn't even wait for your anser. i know that feeling! especially when you're trying to say something in response and that person interrupts you and keeps babbling... it just makes me want to leave immediately. that's why a don't understand the importance of small talk, when people are trying to talk to as many people as they can, when they don't even care about them. talk for a talk - what's the point in that?
+Syifa Nurkhalisa; thats been every teachers advise for how to improve in the classroom. 'talk more, ask more questions'. i even have a stutter to boot.
The number one tip for improving social interaction for me has always been, "don't get caught up in your own head." Number two. "Good posture equals self confidence." You can't feel sorry for yourself while standing like Superman/Wonder Woman.
i just got invited to my friends graduation party and my first reaction was to decine but instead of feeling shitty for it i decided to go and im nervous but very proud of myself.
@@Lizardstookover it was great! i felt so proud of myself for going and it wasnt as bad as i thought it would be. i know i woud have felt worse if i stayed home it was so worth it. sending you love i know you can do it!
Gosh. My life is fucked up. Its so hard making friends being introvert. I walk weird because i'm focusing walking 'normal'. I got the feeling everyone is looking at me and judging me.
+christian sercan You might be shy. Introversion is more about getting energized with alone time. Being afraid about what others think is more like shyness. Bill Gates is an introvert and he will speak his mind with conviction. It doesn't matter who is listening. Someone who is shy is afraid of judgment and confrontation. With that in mind, you can start taking decisive steps towards improving your self-esteem.
I have a great tip: Just sit in front of your computer the whole day and watch some series so you don't have to interact with anyone. Then go grocery shopping at 8pm, so that there are about 5 people in the whole store who all don''t want to talk. Also study from home and always invite just 2 friends or less to your home, where you can be comfortable and tell them to leave at every time, because you need to go grocery shopping, learn or do any other task that seems right in the moment. I mean... It works for me :D
Tip: Try talking to a girl who you know is going a few weeks before you go to the party and get to know her and meet her at the party at the same time. This will build an instant bond and the night will probably go your way.
I use all of these to a point, but I've noticed that people talk how I'm always quiet, both behind my back and to my face, and I'm unable to "own" my introversion, to say stuff like: hey, I'm just introverted, so what? and carry on, so I feel like they think I'm weird and less worthy which led me to having anxiety and sometimes even panic attacks. And yeah, it sucks. The best part is that I can talk with all these people individually or in small groups, but put them all together and I just lose my cool. :/
So I have to go to a dinner with my parents friends and I am going to try to apply these to the dinner: 1. plan your escape (bathroom, I can't ACTUALLY leave cuz my parents are gonna be there and they have the car) 2. locate your place to go if things get too overwhelming (bathroom) 3. give yourself a task (study the menu) 4. find other introverts (my brother) 5. know when to give yourself a break (bathroom again...how do I go to the bathroom like ten times in two hours without attracting suspicion and unwanted attention?)
Just wanted to add to what else you can do for step 3, make origami out of table napkins or serviettes (my sister did it once which fascinated one of my mum's friend's little kids) :P
Another great tip, look for an animal. A cat or a dog, or even fishes. They are great for introverts, they don't require conversation. And also other introvers will seek them out, creating a cozy circle of silence.
Dont look at fishes please, you will look like a freak (Coming form an introvert) Also, dont you fucking dare disturbing the dog, just pet him or play with him if he wants to, dont pursue the fucking creature unless someone is disturbing him, then go consolate him
Perhaps an introvert can make a video about how extroverts should just leave us the hell alone and not take offense if we don't want to attend your party XD
IntrovertedSkorpyo Unfortunately you are right. A lot of people with the introverted personality are prone to addiction, even to things like marijuana and opium, and rely on it just in order to feel good. In the long run though, it makes these people even more anti-social and depressed. Why go out when you can get doped up in your room? I have a small problem with it myself. And yes, it is too bad that we live in an extroverts world, especially in the U.S. We are forced to adapt and to fit into social norms that don't even seem logical to us.
Dae Dalus I really don't understand why people need to have these limitations like daily Jobs - from 8am to 6pm to get money, so you can survive. I like the idea that you can be free of limitations and get creative. Like Project jobs and etc. Comments here are very helpful, thank you all!
Raivis Tomsons I'd say the general economy and industry of American business, as well as our pop-culture in whole is quite pitted against those with introverted tendencies, and with little consideration for typical worldviews and personality types of introverts
INTJ-Skorpyo7 Is INTJ your personality type? My university tracked me for about a year and concluded that I am INFP. If I remember, both of those personalities make up about 1% of the population haha.
I relate with this so much... An extrovert friend of mine invited me to her party at a bar a few months ago, and i worked myself to such a state of panic that i ended up not going (she would be the only person i would be at friendly terms with at the party). My relationship with her has been weird and distant ever since then though...
Penny K. yah, ive been there, one of my friends invited me over, finally convinces me to go, snapped and ran out of his house, was gone for about 30 mins. havent really talked to him much, aside from the nod when passing
I don't get anxiety from parties, i just get very bored. I want to enjoy parties and going out so I'll pregame with my roommates. Drinking, smoking playing some video games before we hit the town. I enjoy this way more than going out. We go out and find a party and usually within a half hour I regret going out. I don't drink so sometimes I'm the dd for my friends so I can't leave. I get stuck at some party, bored out of my mind and all I want to do is go back home sit in my room put on some music. I love sitting in my room alone, turning all the light off, smoke a joint, put on some music, and get lost in my thoughts.
Best tip: when talking to someone focus on them. Direct your attention outward instead of internally. Most likely the other person is feeling slightly anxious as well and if you can ease their tension yours will disappear as well.
OK with the advice, except the 1st one : preparing ANY excuse doesn't work, because it is often excruciating for introverts to lie. Find a real excuse: you feel tired or sick.
Agree. I used this some time ago. I just told the host, a good friend who could understand, that I was feeling socially akward and that it was better for me to leave. It so happened that night museums opened doors and I past a good time visiting a museum.
Try this step: always leave the party on a high. Get out of there before your energy is drained. Extroverts will try to talk at you and steal your energy - beware!! There's a playlist of INTROVERT SURVIVAL VIDEOS on my channel BTW
Exactly. The video was going well until she said some parties cannot be avoided. I won't even go to job parties, so what kind would be fucking obligatory to me? Fuck obligatory parties up the ass with no lube and plenty of thorns.
family occasions such as birthdays... getting dragged by friends because you are the only one with a car etc...introverts do have social lives, friends and family isn't just for extroverts.
Okay so, I get really tired after parties and I CANNOT talk to a group of over 6 people without my energy draining away and getting a headache. I also hate it when I'm in class and we're working and the noise level is through the roof. Other than that, I like socializing if it's with a close friend and/or someone with whom the conversation won't get awkward. Anyone else?
omg samee! I hate it when its too loud in class and I can't talk to my classmates because when the topics of talking are over, there will be that awkward silence. Also every time when I have to talk to people like for buying something or asking about the direction if I'm lost, I do dozens of scenarios in my head about what to say and what to do
I have the same problem.I plan a bunch of scenarios in my head of what that person could possibly say then they say something completely different! I'm like "Will you just stick to the plan in my head?!" I also have the same problem in class.People will just talk and talk while the teacher is trying to teach and I think "Why did you come here if you're just going to set yourself up to fail in life?Just stay home if you're going to act like an idiot because i don't want you dragging me down when your disruptions land you working at a dumpster."
Sometimes people think that the "i need time alone for recharge" is because you don't like them or you are avoiding them or you are too boring. But i just really need to be alone!!!
It's nice to know that I'm not alone in that department! Yeah, this happens to me all the time! Talking gently is my preventative measure to reduce the possibility of anything escalating to yelling, but I have really bad anxiety when people around me are yelling! Do you have any way of reducing that anxiety?
+Andrew Wysocki Well you could try avoiding these kind of situations by talking gently like you said. If you are talking to a friend you could ask them to speak more quietly but sometimes that doesn't work so maybe you can try getting out of the room or even put on headphones so you don't have to deal with them anymore lol. But for example if a teacher is yelling well.. you can't do much unfortunately. Try covering your ears I guess? Glad I'm not alone either! Hope this helps 😊
MrMetalHead1100 not quite true. Everyone (excluding people with certain disorders, e.g. APD) gets lonely. Look up Eysenck's personality theory for a real explanation of introversion/extraversion that also covers neuroticism and psychoticism which were omitted from this video due to either a lack of research/understanding or for the sake of simplicity.
Saul Goodman, okay to be fair it's severe APD that removed a person from loneliness, as in crippling serial killer levels of APD. Not really a majority, more a minority amongst minority's. Oh, and I show up on the APD spectrum as well. Not yet established the severity of my case, but I don't really get loneliness. I don't quite understand it. I can mimic it fairly well though.
There are different types of introverts. Some genuinely don't like people, while some want to be alone but still wants company every now and then. Some introverts like being alone, but not feeling lonely in other words.
Ask the host if they need help? Are you nuts? 1, that sounds impossible and very stressful. You need to find out who the host is. You need to break expectations and rules to ask them, they'll most likely say no and just want you to enjoy yourself. 2. What will they think of you? Maybe they'll think you're trying to rob them or other people. Maybe they think you're trying to get closer to them. You never know! 3. The host is probably in a huge group of people and would be super intimidating to pull them away to ask this. And seriously, who would say they want help with stuff? 4. You have to talk to EVERYBODY at the party. You have to go up to people in the middle of doing something, ask for trash then answer the same questions over and over. "Why are you collecting trash?" "Are you with the host?" "Is the party ending early?" It's just so stressful. I'm not sure who thought this was a good idea, but it wasn't an introvert. Oh also I have complaints with finding introverts
If I was alone at a party the LAST thing I would want is someone coming up to me. Introverts wouldn't stick together, and joining a small group is stressful too. All the attention goes on you if they accept you, making you be more engaged, and if you're not, you just stand there while they continue talking about whatever else. I think GOING with other introverts is a better option. Honestly what were you guys thinking?
Well it's also nice to help the host. The host most likely has a lot of stress too because of preparing cleaning up making sure everybody's happy. So it is relieving when the host gets help. Even if you're an introvert, you can help too.
The worst thing about parties is that they make me realize the difference between myself and others, between my anxiety and feeling awkward to them having fun, flirting and enjoying themselves. Really depresses me, because i want to be like them, but just can't. I'd like to add another suggestion for party survival: Don't get high or drunk. A couple of beers.. sure. But don't get wasted. It will lower your self control which will help all those feelings of anxiety and stress come out. And trust me.. people will realize. One way or the other.
***** Because humans are social animals, and society is organized around that fact. It's the way of the world. And because of that, as Samurailord correctly said, extroverts are better suited to function in the world we live in. It's a lot like early birds vs. night owls. Like it or not, the world seems to revolve around getting up early in the morning. Unfortunately, I'm a night owl. It makes it very hard to get along in the world. Everything seems to operate on the basis of being up and active in the morning. I'm a lawyer, and about 95% of my court appearances are in the morning. It's even worse for those of us on the west coast, which is three hours "behind" the east coast. If I need to call an insurance adjuster on the east coast and it's 2:00 in the afternoon here, it's already 5:00 pm over there and everyone's gone home for the day. If the majority of people are a certain way, the rest of us unfortunately just have to "suck it up" and adapt. It's a struggle, but it's the way things are.
***** For many reasons. No matter if you wanna be successfull in your job, if you wanna get laid, make money as an enterpreneur or just live a happy and fullfilled life.. you need to be an extrovert for everything. At least as a man you are expected to be a dominant, alpha male bursting with self-confience, endless energy and a "i'll have it my way" attutide.
Samurailord sorry man, but thats not true. You can do this things even in a "introverted" way. If you try to change yourself and behave different then you are you will only attract other people who try to hide their "true nature", instead of finding people and relationships with humans, who also went through hardships, but ultimately survived and found a way to "live" in their own way, instead of letting society change them.
Ugh your comment is so true it makes me even that much more aware of what sets me apart from other people... The worst part is knowing that there's really nothing to be done in order to change my personality...
I'm not sure if I'm an introvert or just weird but I am very extroverted when I meet new people, I can make conversation with strangers really easily. But once I know someone and am obligated to make conversation with them I hate it. I also avoid large parties because they stress me out, unless I'm with people I have never met before at the party. Is that a thing or am I just crazy?
It is the same for me. I also think when you meet new people you always have something to talk about...like where they live and their hobbies....but when you know a person it becomes more difficult to start a conversation and find something to keep talking
An introvert with extroverted qualities (or vice versa) is called an ambivert, but basically the terms introvert and extrovert are basically whether you get stimulation from being alone or with other people. So people can be really social but will need alone time, and they will be introverts. However, I am SO introverted that it's not even funny anymore, and HATE parties, smalltalk, social situations etc
Maybe you are both. (Ambivert) Also, I think no one is a complete introvert or extrovert. I have a 95% of introverts characteristics and a 5% of extrovert characteristics. For example I'm very shy when I have to give a presentation in front of my classmates. And I hate it. But this year I had to go to a competition in which I had to GIVE A DANM PRESENTATION IN FRONT OF SCIENCE PROFESORS. I was really paranoic that day. But the magic happen and I did a "regular" presentation without Freaking out. Also when I have to make new friends I am a total introvert. But talking to Stranger that I know I won't see them EVER IN MY LIFE is like magic happen and I look like an extrovert. TOTALLY Weird my friend. What-What!?
I use the give yourself a job idea quite often. Before an event I ask the host or event planner if there is anything I can help with. It gives me something to do so I don't feel so self conscious. It also gives me an in to interact with others, especially when I have been asked to photograph an event. My camera is my prop! I am able to discuss photography with others. A camera is a good conversation starter!
you should have mentioned that there are also ambiverts like me. I can an introvert and extrovert at the same time depending on the situation and my mood.
I don't really feel insecure or afraid in any way at a party, just bored. I don't find anything to do (besides eating, which I could be doing alone on my own). I feel more irritated than anything, I hate the loud music, I hate loud places and people, I hate dancing and I hate the feeling of being in a group, thats why when I go out with friends I go with one at a time, never in groups, or even small groups. Just me and other friend. That's my limit
about the step three, if you're an introvert with social anxiety, this is really not gonna help you, like, helping with serving the food, oh my god, for me it's even worse than staying in a party for too long
***** can't relate. i would rather stand doing nothing than serving food, feeling like i'm bothering people, i would prolly do awkward thing, drop food or smtgh, i cant even imagine.
***** good tips but most of the time i'm the one that over-react in my head and i feel ridiculous, i mean yea i can stay calm, thats what i always do at my best
I have noticed that it may be hard to want to go out and interact with people when your an introvert, but the more you do it the easier it becomes. It may not seem like it but you really can change who you are (for example an introvert can become an extrovert if they wanted to enough) and frankly the more you practice in social interactions the less awkward you become as well. It is never to late to change.
do introverts come in the "lesser introvert" model? because i like social things, especially with friends and sometimes i'm the hyped up in the group, but when it comes to strangers it's all different, i get quiet and just don't act silly or don't make stupid jokes... maybe it's just shyness? is it different or is it the same?
I'm an introvert too and I have exactly the same problems! when I'm with my best friend, I'm totaly different than in my class (I don't have real friends in my class...) And sorry if there are some mistakes, I'm from Germany...😊
I'm an introvert too and I have exactly the same problems! when I'm with my best friend, I'm totaly different than in my class (I don't have real friends in my class...) And sorry if there are some mistakes, I'm from Germany...😊
It happens to me too, I like going to places if I go with my friend or someone I know that isn't necessarily my friend, but if I don't know anybody there I'm like wtf can I do here and I just stay there like a lifeless body
yes! I've been doing all those things for years and some people don't even know I am an introvert. Learning to leave when I am not having fun and not feel ashamed of it was a breakthrough... so the first step is very important.
This video (especially the start where it explains things about introverts and extroverts) made me feel so much better! I am an introvert and quite shy as well and I always have these troubled thoughts about having to socialize! A tip to other introverts : it is true that we prefer small groups of people, so don't try to socialize by going to partys! You will shine when with the right people. (See! I always knew it is not bad to be an introvert! ahah I'm saying this to my mother who always pushes me to socilaize and go to partys and makes me feel even worse in the end!)
I had this school party i had to attend (literally no excuses allowed) and when i arrived i just hid in the bathroom the whole time until it was over, many people asked me where i was that night, i kinda ignored them but oh well
Oh my god I completely understand that. At school I sit nearly every lunch break in the bathroom because I want to.. escape? or to hide I guess.. I hardly doubt my friends even notice that
omg that's sooo me! always when my one best friend was staying home and I was left completely alone at school (the rest of the school's population does not count of course), I always used to go to the bathroom every break and lock myself up in a toilet cabin until the break was over and classes began... again and again... ;-;
Omg this randomly just reminded me i was at a friends house and there were like 10 of us and i went upstairs to go to the toilet and on the way back i found their dog and just sat on the floor with it for like 15 minutes cause i didnt want to talk to people 😂
Here are more tips :) 1.) if u wanna leave just call your mom and pretend that your mom wants you to come home 2.) if you need a breather go to the bathroom 3.) come early so you know where the bathroom and other places in the house 4.) if you feel anxious or drained leave, it’s not worth it 5.) if your not having fun leave it’s fine
Or you could follow my one easy step: Never go to parties. Don't feel pushed to do these things if you really don't want to. Don't let extroverts push you around.
As an introvert i could say: I want to go to parties and enjoy. I don't feel push, i just want to get some drink and have a nice night. But if i don't match, or know someone... fuck off, i tried it. Introverts aren't antisocial (generally)
***** I used to drink a lot to force myself to be an extrovert and developed a drinking problem. Why? Because I was making friends with alcoholic extroverts and had to drink to keep up and "be fun". Now I don't drink at all and have done some serious housecleaning with those "friends". I like other introverts and a big party to them is a dinner with 8-10 close friends (those don't happen very often). I agree with OP, don't go to parties if they make you unhappy. Using chemicals to force yourself into being something you are not for other people who don't really care to understand you is not worth it. :)
Thanks! These tips will help me! I am an introvert married to an extrovert. He gets invited to parties and loves for me to come too. He knows it's hard for me and exhausting. He always give me the control to decide when to leave, but maybe with these tips, I will be able to enjoy myself a little longer before making the great escape.
Im an introvert with an extremely extroverted personality. I can be the life of the party, give speeches in front of thousands of people no problem. However, I only have short spurts of energy to do this before I become "brain dead" where I need my alone time. Once my energy is drained I can be cranky and moody. I always wanted to badly to compete for the center of attention with extroverts for popularity but im now realizing that im in a losing race. MY brain chemistry and energy level always gets depleted whenever i try to participate in large social activities or popularity contests.
+El Gringo Dude same. When I talk to someone in a group of people I don't know, I may have the energy to show off to all of them. But then later on I lose interest and I just don't wanna talk to them anymore. I mean I wanna talk to people and don't wanna be alone, make friends, but then feel like I don't want to move on with it. Is this normal :( ?
+Triple D seems like you are my clone, im having the exact same problem. Whenever im in groups with 3-5 people i feel comftable and even can laugh a lot. But when im alone with another one or a girl, i have to think of everything twice about what i want to say. The result is that i never have good converstations with people moreover they dont really want to do something with me plus i dont get a a grilfriend easily.
+El Gringo Same, I'm usually the sarcastic, punny friend that cracks most of the jokes to get people laughing. Though I love seeing and making people happy, just being in a huge, crowded environment drains me and I've even had anxiety attacks in the past because of it. However, something I've discovered for myself to help me stay calm in huge places has helped. Like reading alone at a cafe or restaurant, people will leave me alone, and sometimes another introvert or book lover in general will come over and talk to me about my book. Or going to a concert that I would love to go to, but there is too many faces there and it's all cramped. I only go to those with a maximum of two close friends, or I go by myself. I also live in PA, so most concerts take place in large fields, people who stand or sit in the fields pay less, this is what me and other introverts do since it's not cramped and you get to see all of the light and stage work. Sorry for the long post that probably doesn't have much to do with your comment. Have a good one, now.
same unless you're some kind of strange very shy extrovert but i doubt that could be called extrovert. so yeah you're introvert but then again seeing how you're negative about life with little/no friends you might be a mix, you should be enjoying your hobbies if you're introvert maybe books/movies, maybe your job, drawing,gaming, research, anime, (again i dont know how/why would you not have friends now) if you really dont enjoy much in your life try to overcome and get social life, you can watch tutorials on youtube, or/and you should research and try more things/hobbies to see what you enjoy, i have few friends and barely see them but i have a ton of hobbies so if i get bored of one i get another (carpentry,gaming, movies,tv series,anime,books,manga,work,drawing,youtube vids, music, etc)
gytis dramblewolfskis my problem is that even if i want to talk to people (lets say on a break in school or break in work) and we are in a group and they are talking about something... most of the times i just have no idea what to say except "yea, mhm, aha, sure, mmm ye right" :|
Suvvri well in a group it's harder as other people might have something better to say, they will remember your bad interaction more etc, better try to do conversations with 1 person again watch tutorials, first i watched few videos of how to get friends then i got recomendations to improve social skills,like how to continue conversation which is what you lack most i guess. i like mickael valmont videos. first you gotta have few hobbies,like you play guitar in your vids and you are kind of a youtuber which can help you continue conversation few times,and more importantly you're more interesting if you got are passionate about something. And you're supposed to talk about stuff you don't know much about as well(small talk), everything should slowly improve if you get into many interactions, and get a little guidance,(the videos) looks can help too btw.
That's how it goes for us, we prefer to talk about things that we can think about. Small talk is mostly just a waste of time and we can't focus on it, especially with multiple people. I haven't really had a close friend while at school, but at uni I found a guy I could easily talk to (it was still near impossible for us to talk while in a group though). Eventually you'll find someone too but before you do, survive :D
I CONSTANTLY tell my extrovert friend that quote "It's not that i want to be alone, i want to be left alone" and she always gets offended and thinks i hate her and everyone around me .____.
I am living the life of a introvert living alone no friends I want excitement in my life I want human interaction and people mistake me for a introvert
Ever tried joining a sports club or something similar? You meet new people and mostly they also do things outside of sport or club activities together. At first it feels akward but in the end you really expanded your social circle. :)
As a 32 year old introvert I know these steps work. I kind of figured them out on my own. Still can't go to a club or something like that with a lot of people. Thick crowds, loud music, blinking lights etc... But a normal party, sure. And alcohol doesn't work. Unless you drink yourself until you pass out. That usually isn't fun though.
Me at a party: *Finds the one person I know*
*Clings to them and follows them around for the entire party*
Nightstorm haha same 😂😂😂😂
Same! There was one time when my friend at that party was hanging out with a boy (that I actually hate, so I was quite angry with her because I've told her that that boy is a mess) so I was basically alone taking care of another friend who was crazy drunk and sobbing. It was such a mess.
This is literally me. I just got back from a party and did the same shit.
I do that, but they just walk to the extroverted people and I get forced to following them singing and dancing like crazy
That was exactly me last night but she got annoyed 😂
I am literally at a party right now, sitting in the corner, and watching this....
Why go to a party when you can stay in your bedroom reading a novel and drinking tea
Why did I only now discovered this videos it shown 100% of my behavior at parties.
How can you hear the video with all the loud music?
Lina Laughs headphones
🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️😂😂😂😂
Welcome to Finland, here being introvert is the norm. It's a safe haven in an extrovert world.
can I go there? please?
Sweden too!
If it wouldn't be cold there I'd honestly consider :D
damn it, well i guess I´ll have to move someday ^^
Yep, moving to Finland.
I get jealous of the extroverts at the party who are totally enjoying themselves, laughing, chatting, dancing, being free. I'm standing there observing it all and wishing i could be free and enjoy.
Exactly how i feel sometimes
That means you are shy not introvert.... because introvert is kinda nature of human that love isolation from being in noise or interacting with people....😊.....you are jealous for not attending the crowd means you are shy type person.....not introvert ❤️
Literally alcohol is the solution
@@martindempers7732lol yes😂
@@theblissedcorner1728 you can be shy and an introvert
i cant tell if i'm an introvert or if i just hate everyone.
+olivia s probs both
+olivia s maybe a cynic
+olivia s Me too!
agreed !
+olivia s same...
don't worry my fellow introverts , we shall take this world and make the extroverts live in an introvert world.
How? by wiping out most extroverts?
Ahsan That's a plan I can get into, good thinking
Ahsan I was thinking about converting them but your way works to.
Comander Alpha Doge we must unite
How are we supposed to do that? That would involve leaving the house!
why do I watch this, I dont even get invited to parties :/
Would you want to be?
I don't even like parties (ok, sometimes) I need a lot recovery time for such things
Hey!
Tim Grabowski Lol same
Tim Grabowski same
I like to party, i want to party, i just don't know how to be social.
I only go to parties of there’s a lot of people so that I can hide in the crowd and dance without people noticing me and talking to me
Totally relatable
Omg same! I love parties but I just want to be by myself
I feel u u feel me
Sigh😌
this
For introverts stepping into a party is like entering a restricted area in the Assassin's Creed games.
Rayyan Ali lmao bro im dead
Lmfao true 😂😂😂
lmao i felt this one
Good one
Indeed😂
I don't need to watch this video. Here's all an introvert has to do to survive a party:
Step 1) Don't go
Step 2) Feel relief
***** Why can't someone run from social gathering? What would stop them?
***** The realization that you can't both have friends and also ditch them when they want to hang out with you? Obviously there are more ways to socialize than at parties, but you can't realistically expect to be able to keep declining someone's invitations and still keep your social ties with them. This is precisely one of the significant dilemmas of socialization that introverts have. If you just plain don't want any friends that will end up inviting you to parties then you aren't a demographic this is even concerned about.
Vulcapyro
"but you can't realistically expect to be able to keep declining someone's invitations and still keep your social ties with them"
Unless they are worth being called friends and understand that not everyone is like them and aren't being a douche about it. The rest, I can live without comfortably.
There is a difference between big party and small gathering.
tinkerwithstuff Took the words out of my mouth, eh fingers. A true friend will understand if asking you to go to a party is like asking if you want a colonoscopy.
That works 9 out of 10 times. Some parties you can't avoid without some serious egg on your face. IE a relative's bar mitzvah , wedding etc. It being family would make it easier though, because you know everyone there and remember at least half their names (in my case). This is good advice for when it's unavoidable.
Party survival guide for introverts mk2:
1) Find door
2) Open door
3) Walk through door
Tadaaa!
Why solve a problem when you can avoid it?
depends on which side of the door you start on
900bot mind blown
Im confused, are you talking about sovling a problem or... how do you avoid it while............. not avoiding it? (maby easy for most bot nor for some.. thing like me...)
Well obviously it's preferable just to not go.
This is a just-in-case measure should you suddenly and inexplicably find yourself at a party. Somehow.
that's genius! pussying out is way better than challenging your inner demons.
I’m so terrified of social interaction that it’s affecting essential parts of my everyday life. I’m in college and if you don’t go to parties or don’t hang out with your classmates after class, you get left behind. You never have a project partner, you get bad grades, you finally graduate with zero connections and then this miserable circle follows you into the real world when you have to find work. It’s a never ending cycle of crapiness and I wish I never had become an introvert.
I feel very similar to your feelings.High School and college were the worst of times.I usually found a few friends who were not that outgoing and we got drunk to stop feeling like we didn't fit in.Now that I am in the work world, I chose the wrong career for an introvert, wasted many years.We are supposed to be very creative, right now I am wanting to create a better income for myself.Being an introvert in the USA is no fun at all.If I had a ton of money I would move to some remote place in the Arizona desert, buy a large area of land, and only socialize with other introverts.
bloo jkl45 grades and social interaction don’t correlate stop making excuses for your life. I often find that the classes I don’t speak to people in, I concentrate and do better in. Just introduce yourself to someone, start a friendly conversation- it’s really not that hard.
You have not "become" an introvert, you're born this way like lady gaga sings. Introverts are great leaders! And there are many introverts leading the world. People like Barack Obama, elon musk, Marilyn Monroe and many more people are all introverts. I know it sucks cause I am kinda in the same situation. But I'm sure it's all gonna work out
Fucking same dude, it sucks 😓
All my conversation are uncomfortable.
I remember sometimes I would get told at parties why am I so shy or so quiet, and I would have to be nice and say politely 'I don't know'. But in my head my response was 'I DON'T LIKE WASTING WORDS'.
Ben Montes a better response would be 'because I'm a f**king introvert, deal with it'
That's too savage.
+Ben Montes I know your struggle except that I'm in college and those who I speak with always ask me why I don't talk or do the stuff they do and then they go about telling me how I should be and I'm like if there's nothing important to talk about there's no need to speak.and then it goes on every single day.
I'm also in college, and one of the reasons why I stopped going to parties is because I would sometimes feel like I'm trying too hard to blend in the environment or I simply felt I didn't belong so I got more involved with clubs and other things.
I wouldn't even say anything, just smile and shrug lol
Step 1: Don't go.
Phew, even that step got me stressed out.
Theres one big piece of advice that solves the introvert at a party problem: DRINK. and if you don’t drink then.. rip fellow introverts
And don't feel guilty because you're not socializing enough or sitting by yourself.
Extroverts: How can you be alone for that long?
Me: HOW DO YOU GO EVERYWHERE. AND TALK. TO EVERYONE. AND ENJOY IT.
I understand this cuz we’re in quarantine now and eveyone is like “I wanna go out and do something” but I’m fine in quarantine. I’m just not the type of person who likes to go out a lot. Yeah it’s sometimes boring and I have nothing to do but I’m not desperate to see friends and that😂
No, a large party is WAY scarier than an overdue trip to the dentist.
Just get drunk m8
Truest fact EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bad advice. Extroverts tend to take advantage of things without even realizing it. Introverts getting drunk will be exposed and humiliated. Introvert wakes up the next day, and finds out that gossip about them getting smashed has spread like wildfire is hell on earth.
Unknown Error ikr
I haved experienced already a few times around a fews days to about a few months overdue trip to a dentist.
Party Survival Guide for Introverts:
Don't go.
^ wisdom
Truth.
Hail CTHVLHV
Good one..?
+CarsonFacePalmer i know. Human is an animal that belongs to a group. So if you cant not be awkward and talk to people why the fuck you call yourself a human. Funniest part is that most introverts are proud of being one, which is so plainly stupid
Hail CTHVLHV
I don't understand all the hate you have towards introverts. They do something to you as a kid or something?
I went to a party yesterday and I was freaking out. I nearly started crying because my anxiety was triggering me.
Hey, the most important thing is it is ok now. You survived that and hopefully for a long time you will be spared of such events. Have some good tea (or beverage of your choice) and enjoy a good time of just relaxing:)
Parties are an awful way of spending time anyway.
Ava you better be joking
Aww, I know that feeling.. Maybe you can try going with a semi-extroverted friend who'll keep you socialised and safe at the same time, or at least a really sympathetic friend or fellow introvert..
Just don't think about the fear. Loosen up, grab a glass, smile a little and do as if you are very content with yourself. Before you know it people will be flocking around you!
get a Doc to prescribe you some klonopin. I remember back when I had panic attacks sooo bad and the only way I could make it through parties etc..Was to take 1mg of Klonopin, smoke a bowl, ( weed..some headdies), and have a beer. But that was 10 yrs ago and Im no longer like that. But I still hate parties.
Everyone with social anxiety make some noise!
Me and fellow introverts: **nervous mumbling**
... you know social anxiety is a fear of social interaction right?
@@sanjanam520 Yeah and it's definetely not the same as introversion. They may overlap tho
Laughed way too hard at this 😂
I'm an introvert but I like socializing. IF I CAN do it. I'm so awkward around people.
When there's noone home, i really enjoy it. I can do whatever i want, it's quite, peaceful, and just relaxing. I don't get bored as i have plenty of different stuff to do. And yes, i do have (a) friend(s), but i usually only hang out with one.
Same
Glad I'm not the only one
Boggy Bolt Same. Except i don't have friends to invite lol
Oh God finally found somebody like me
same
Being an introvert is easy, realizing it was hard. When I read Quiet by Susan Cain a bunch of stuff fell into place.
I'd advise anybody to read it, even extroverts can learn something from it, like that it isn't just something you can turn off. You can hide it but you can not turn it off.
I just wish the business world would stop focusing on extroversion. I swear going to job fairs at my university was one of the most stressful things I have ever done, and interviews were really stressful as well because we're taught that the interviewer wants a conversation , and as an introvert you want to be anywhere but there.
Doesn't matter that I had a really high GPA, understood what was needed from me, and willing to work for it because I could not keep the extroverted interviewer's interest....
Sorry went on a rant there. After failing to land a job in my major's vocation, I've been thinking that universities need to work with employers in promoting all personalities.
Introverts have a lot to offer!
Erick K
Erick K that book is ace! I am an extrovert who means to wards introversion- I like parties but I will retreat after a while to be by myself and me only ☺
I'm ordering this book. Thank you. I forgot who I was, dealing with extroverts just to get a damn paycheck. You and this video just reminded me, I am an AWESOME introvert with a lot to contribute to the world in my own quiet way. :-)
Employers want people who can handle social situations and work well in groups, because skills needed for a job can be taught, working well among people on the other hand cannot be.
Intovert: *hides in corner*
Extrovert: *parties hard*
Ambivert: *RUNS IN CIRCLES*
I do those 3 things while (in order)
Sober
Drunk
High
Lil uzi vert: starts dancing
I’m all three lmao
Ambrivert Check!
@@Leo-bd7fw Yeah but don't over do it
"introverts have to go to parties and do small talk" hell no I've never went to a party in my whole life and never will, screw social interactions I'm staying home eating cake and playing games
j1a2y3m4y5 same😂
ahahah yeah, fuck normal social interactions
Quete Importa Fuck cars!!
+Klein Don't know what you mean but yeah fuck cars!
j1a2y3m4y5
Yahhhhhhhhh
I am an extreme introvert. I cherish my time alone more so than being with others. I'd rather stay home and read a book, watch my favorite show, or listen to music alone in my room than be out with friends at a party. I feel comfortable with a small number of people. Two, three, four at the max. I get nervous meeting new people. I'd rather have no friends than go through the awkwardness of meeting new ones. That's just how we are :)
Me too 👌
Morgan Vizzini Same, but I'm an extreme extrovert one line.
Me too
Same
Same! Here.
This is stupid. Don't force yourself to going to a party if you don't want to. Stay home and do whatever you want. But if you actually find yourself on a party, you don't need any escape plans, just say you already want to go home and go home. Don't force yourself to play by their rules, this is exactly why there are so many depressed introverts that think there is something wrong with them. Try to explain to your friends how you feel, if they really are you friends, then they will understand, if not, then they are not worth it. Sigh
I wish this would work for parents though.
This is why I don't have friends...
if only it were that easy to explain...
None of my friends seem to understand. Especially since I'm a college student. It's "normal" to go to parties, concerts, be in clubs, and just always know what's going on on or off campus. College is too extrovert centric which is why I've been having such an awful time.
diradosveta TOP 10 CZ Erm, this doesn't work for everyone... Sometimes you HAVE to go, as said on the beginning. And I for example don't have the courage to tell someone I don't want to be there and want to go home, even if they're my friends/family, it's not that easy. So excuses are safer for me.
#6 find a dog or cat that you can play with
I was playing with a a cat when a big family party LOL
Must of them just dancing, playing basketball(I don't hate basketball), and singing
Most of them are EXTROVERTS !, THEY'RE absurd and they love mundane normy stuff
... or a gerbil?
HAHA this is so tru😭
I don't like animals. Man I am seriously thinking of suicide.
Last time I went to a party every conversation I had died in 30 seconds flat. I get so nervous I can't think and people must sense it. I feel like I repel people. It makes me kind of hate extroverts.
or you're just bad in conversations, or you look ugly. you can watch videos about how to start converstation, how to continue it, how to get friends etc. etc.
gytis dramblewolfskis
"...or you look ugly"
What does that have to do with anything?
gytis dramblewolfskis "or you look ugly"? How god damn superficial can thou get？！
... I had that very same problem here's what you do... ask.alot.of.questions... everyone and I mean EVERYONE is narcissistic and love to talk about themselves... questions like
so what do you do?
have you lived here long?
how are you finding the hors d'oeuvres? (depends on type of party don't ask this on a casual setting)
this stupid little questions like that are an abomination for both of us... because we don't give a damn... (or at least I don't) but... it will keep them talking for hours...
here's a list on topics you can ask about:
fashion
music
art
literature
video games
relation to EVERYONE at the party
TV shows
EVERYTHING ELSE!!! with the exception of:
topics to avoid
Politics
religion that is it...
good luck...
Radioactive Panda i dont mean you look ugly as in you're born,ungly. I mean you wear light blue baggy jeans,dont watch your head,you smell etc.
For some reason it sounds like being introvert is bad. But to me it's not.
I can only talk about my experience, but maybe you can relate.
I might not be someone to talk a lot, but if participating in a conversation I tend to focus more on the content.
I am actually always expecting my opposite to say something of value and I am eager to
extract that very knowledge my conversation partner tries to convey.
However, that's exactly why small talks turns me off so much. It appears bland, unnecessary and mildly treacherous.
That's probably why innitiating a conversation in the first place feels so odd. There is in fact no particular reason to talk to someone you don't know unless of course you need help. But on a party you are literally just killing time trying to have fun.
And forcing yourself to have fun is counterproductive.
I don't mean to generalize this, but if there is something I hate about extroverts it is their superficiality.
Some People should slow down their need to talk and instead listen more carefully, because that's how you "look up" the facts.
From what I've learned in my 21 years of life, it is that miscommunication is one of humanites greatest problems.
ooh i can't stand those people who are just talking all the time and not even trying to listen to other people. It's even worse when two persons of this kind talk to each other, because it looks like they're talking to a wall ,if you know what i mean :) sometimes it seems to me that throughout our entire lives we're trying to make somebody listen to us, but at the same time we don't listen to others
hope you get my point
Kate Wonder
Ohh I can relate to that so much.
It feels bad when someone doesn't even wait for your anser.
Mostly I just keep nodding in that case while thinking:
"Congratz bro here is your prize I approve your talk with a special badge crafted only to suite your chest"
The funny thing is, many people like me for just doing that - listening. They seem to think I sucked up everything they said, without waiting for my response.
One more thing referring to:
"...when two persons of this kind talk to each other, because it looks like they're talking to a wall"
If there is some sort of excitement coming up in a conversation there are those moments somtimes. I am just craving for the right words and stay silent for a while, thinking of the right formulation to get my point across.
But that seems to turn off many people, they intuitively try to fill this void. As if they would prefer a talk thats similar to a sound track being played over an actually interactive and reactive talk.
>It feels bad when someone doesn't even wait for your anser.
i know that feeling! especially when you're trying to say something in response and that person interrupts you and keeps babbling... it just makes me want to leave immediately. that's why a don't understand the importance of small talk, when people are trying to talk to as many people as they can, when they don't even care about them. talk for a talk - what's the point in that?
Kate Wonder
Have a nice day Kate
thanks you too Bananenbauer123
I already do these on a regular basis. Even a classroom full of students is tiring.
Indeed!
Diego Sheish truee especially everyone always says "why are you so quiet? talk more"
+Syifa Nurkhalisa; thats been every teachers advise for how to improve in the classroom. 'talk more, ask more questions'. i even have a stutter to boot.
Really? In my case, since I've seen my classmates for years, I'm used to them, and it doesn't affect me very negatively.
TOTALLY TRUE!
The number one tip for improving social interaction for me has always been, "don't get caught up in your own head."
Number two. "Good posture equals self confidence." You can't feel sorry for yourself while standing like Superman/Wonder Woman.
Actual good advice here
When in doubt... find the cats
The Modern Hermeticist lol what
Or dogs
When in doubt... pinkie out
The Modern Hermeticist I'm an extrovert with cats.
I are here meow :3
i'd like to think im an introvert, what gives me the most energy is watching youtube vids after work, by myself, alone, so gratifying
Starts at 2.58.
Unless you don't know if you're an introvert.
Also ignore if you're not neurotic. Eysenck's personality theory. Trust me. I'm a non-neurotic introvert.
i just got invited to my friends graduation party and my first reaction was to decine but instead of feeling shitty for it i decided to go and im nervous but very proud of myself.
how was it? 😭 I’m in the same situation
@@Lizardstookover it was great! i felt so proud of myself for going and it wasnt as bad as i thought it would be. i know i woud have felt worse if i stayed home it was so worth it. sending you love i know you can do it!
@@brenna5305 thank you so much for responding (: i’m glad it went alright !
Gosh. My life is fucked up.
Its so hard making friends being introvert.
I walk weird because i'm focusing walking 'normal'.
I got the feeling everyone is looking at me and judging me.
Same.
+christian sercan Thats not being an introvert, thats social anxiety
+christian sercan
You might be shy. Introversion is more about getting energized with
alone time. Being afraid about what others think is more like shyness.
Bill Gates is an introvert and he will speak his mind with conviction.
It doesn't matter who is listening. Someone who is shy is afraid of
judgment and confrontation. With that in mind, you can start taking
decisive steps towards improving your self-esteem.
+christian sercan We are, Introverts must die.
This is not introvertion. It's shyness
Best escape plan: Sneak out, allways works for me :D
Used this one yesterday.
Whatsgoingoninmycrib
Escaped?
+ESTAndere Yep. Snuck right out the front door an hour into the party.
Nice! :D
Ha ha! Yes! I've actually done this multiple times!
I have a great tip: Just sit in front of your computer the whole day and watch some series so you don't have to interact with anyone. Then go grocery shopping at 8pm, so that there are about 5 people in the whole store who all don''t want to talk. Also study from home and always invite just 2 friends or less to your home, where you can be comfortable and tell them to leave at every time, because you need to go grocery shopping, learn or do any other task that seems right in the moment. I mean... It works for me :D
Alicia Katharina awesome mastery of these problems! ;-)
Ludwig Cornely Thank you, I'm becoming a professional since I live alone :D
Alicia Katharina
Actually good advice.
I didn't even realize that I do all of those, without noticing.
Only go out when it's dark/rainy/snowy when others preffer to stay indoors
Are you sure we aren't the same person? Haha
Tip: Try talking to a girl who you know is going a few weeks before you go to the party and get to know her and meet her at the party at the same time. This will build an instant bond and the night will probably go your way.
I use all of these to a point, but I've noticed that people talk how I'm always quiet, both behind my back and to my face, and I'm unable to "own" my introversion, to say stuff like: hey, I'm just introverted, so what? and carry on, so I feel like they think I'm weird and less worthy which led me to having anxiety and sometimes even panic attacks. And yeah, it sucks.
The best part is that I can talk with all these people individually or in small groups, but put them all together and I just lose my cool. :/
Same with me. I can talk to one person at a time when no one is around, but in a group I just don't get the situation.
I'm so happy that there are more people like me xD
Welcome to the club! :)
Yah when ever I hang out with like 6 friends at once I go mute and they keep asking me if I am ok and I hate it.
How you doin' Anna? :P Seriously though, yeah that's the worst thing you can do, ask an introvert why they're quiet, it only makes things worse :D
So I have to go to a dinner with my parents friends and I am going to try to apply these to the dinner:
1. plan your escape (bathroom, I can't ACTUALLY leave cuz my parents are gonna be there and they have the car)
2. locate your place to go if things get too overwhelming (bathroom)
3. give yourself a task (study the menu)
4. find other introverts (my brother)
5. know when to give yourself a break (bathroom again...how do I go to the bathroom like ten times in two hours without attracting suspicion and unwanted attention?)
Just wanted to add to what else you can do for step 3, make origami out of table napkins or serviettes (my sister did it once which fascinated one of my mum's friend's little kids) :P
Hazel Chief-rabbit Thx
Mimansa Bhalla No probs :)
+Mimansa Bhalla How did it go?
Hamstar Csatornája Awkwardly
Another great tip, look for an animal. A cat or a dog, or even fishes. They are great for introverts, they don't require conversation. And also other introvers will seek them out, creating a cozy circle of silence.
Dont look at fishes please, you will look like a freak
(Coming form an introvert)
Also, dont you fucking dare disturbing the dog, just pet him or play with him if he wants to, dont pursue the fucking creature unless someone is disturbing him, then go consolate him
And slap the assholes pursuing him
Thank you for not playing music in the background of this helpful video❤️ much appreciated
1 step party survival: Don't go.
Good idea
GibyTheCat The best. :)
MrKitten I know right? Home alone is a real treat. :)
LOL that's right !
A NewWorld17 yeah! right?
Perhaps an introvert can make a video about how extroverts should just leave us the hell alone and not take offense if we don't want to attend your party XD
Amby Cakes buzzfeed has a video like that
We already know that.
~Me, who is an extrovert.
God, if only I graduate high school and move in a house. I'll have peace and quiet
I dont think extroverts actually watch "How to interact with an introvert" stuff its mostly for us to feel like we relate to each other.
Yesss
You missed the most important step: alcohol
introverts are more into heroin
IntrovertedSkorpyo Unfortunately you are right. A lot of people with the introverted personality are prone to addiction, even to things like marijuana and opium, and rely on it just in order to feel good. In the long run though, it makes these people even more anti-social and depressed. Why go out when you can get doped up in your room? I have a small problem with it myself.
And yes, it is too bad that we live in an extroverts world, especially in the U.S. We are forced to adapt and to fit into social norms that don't even seem logical to us.
Dae Dalus I really don't understand why people need to have these limitations like daily Jobs - from 8am to 6pm to get money, so you can survive.
I like the idea that you can be free of limitations and get creative. Like Project jobs and etc.
Comments here are very helpful, thank you all!
Raivis Tomsons I'd say the general economy and industry of American business, as well as our pop-culture in whole is quite pitted against those with introverted tendencies, and with little consideration for typical worldviews and personality types of introverts
INTJ-Skorpyo7 Is INTJ your personality type? My university tracked me for about a year and concluded that I am INFP. If I remember, both of those personalities make up about 1% of the population haha.
Watching a video about my personality makes me feel comfortable
I relate with this so much... An extrovert friend of mine invited me to her party at a bar a few months ago, and i worked myself to such a state of panic that i ended up not going (she would be the only person i would be at friendly terms with at the party). My relationship with her has been weird and distant ever since then though...
Penny K. yah, ive been there, one of my friends invited me over, finally convinces me to go, snapped and ran out of his house, was gone for about 30 mins. havent really talked to him much, aside from the nod when passing
@@analternateaccount2003 That's nothing. At my prom I ended up locking myself on the toilet cubicle and sobbing for 1,5 hours.
I don't get anxiety from parties, i just get very bored. I want to enjoy parties and going out so I'll pregame with my roommates. Drinking, smoking playing some video games before we hit the town. I enjoy this way more than going out. We go out and find a party and usually within a half hour I regret going out. I don't drink so sometimes I'm the dd for my friends so I can't leave. I get stuck at some party, bored out of my mind and all I want to do is go back home sit in my room put on some music. I love sitting in my room alone, turning all the light off, smoke a joint, put on some music, and get lost in my thoughts.
+piratesfan1995able OMG i think the same way!
I HATE party's I just hate being social and worried and
Yess i get bored too 😑
Or just stay in your home. Heaven!
Best tip: when talking to someone focus on them. Direct your attention outward instead of internally. Most likely the other person is feeling slightly anxious as well and if you can ease their tension yours will disappear as well.
OK with the advice, except the 1st one : preparing ANY excuse doesn't work, because it is often excruciating for introverts to lie. Find a real excuse: you feel tired or sick.
Yves22 Yeah, tell the truth. People need to start recognizing that it's ok to not feel ok at certain situations
first it made sense, but now that i read u, it rescued me from unconfortable situations. and i dont like lieing so...
Agree. I used this some time ago. I just told the host, a good friend who could understand, that I was feeling socially akward and that it was better for me to leave. It so happened that night museums opened doors and I past a good time visiting a museum.
well not all introverts find it hard to lie. the only thing you have in common with these people is that you all hate parties
ok but can my escape route be running out the door without saying goodbye or telling anyone
step3 helps a lot. i tried it at a party. not only i didn't get bored but it helped me create a positive image to others.
Try this step: always leave the party on a high. Get out of there before your energy is drained. Extroverts will try to talk at you and steal your energy - beware!! There's a playlist of INTROVERT SURVIVAL VIDEOS on my channel BTW
I'm a well trained introvert, but talking to a ton of people drains my energy to the point of going...yeah, no.
I always jet out early...:D
you're talking about weed right?
Theo Bijveld
Lol. Mary Jane does the opposite for me. Makes me dead tired. :D
Theo Bijveld
That is a pick-me-up for me! Does the trick, and I make the haters hate!
So what yours tips for introverts going to their own wedding
Seeing this title just gave me so much peace. I always psyche myself out when I’m invited to a party and don’t know their other guest 😂😅
Or #6: Just don't go to the party.
+helenGD
xD that's me. oh the excuses I come up with
PASTAAAAAAAA!!!(o^^o) Haha :)
+PASTAAAAAAAA!!!(o^^o) Hetalians, Hetalians everywhere
I HAVE FOUND MY HETALIAN PEOPLE
Exactly.
The video was going well until she said some parties cannot be avoided. I won't even go to job parties, so what kind would be fucking obligatory to me?
Fuck obligatory parties up the ass with no lube and plenty of thorns.
Do people really get forced to go to parties though?
some do because they see you'll dwell into depression otherwise
family occasions such as birthdays... getting dragged by friends because you are the only one with a car etc...introverts do have social lives, friends and family isn't just for extroverts.
ikr i'm an introvert and I simply just don't go to parties. why should you do something you don't like?
exactly
Well, sometimes you just run out of excuses or get dragged there by extrovertet friends. I went to partys just because I didn't want to be mean...
Okay so, I get really tired after parties and I CANNOT talk to a group of over 6 people without my energy draining away and getting a headache. I also hate it when I'm in class and we're working and the noise level is through the roof. Other than that, I like socializing if it's with a close friend and/or someone with whom the conversation won't get awkward.
Anyone else?
omg samee! I hate it when its too loud in class and I can't talk to my classmates because when the topics of talking are over, there will be that awkward silence. Also every time when I have to talk to people like for buying something or asking about the direction if I'm lost, I do dozens of scenarios in my head about what to say and what to do
I have found my people
I have the same problem.I plan a bunch of scenarios in my head of what that person could possibly say then they say something completely different! I'm like "Will you just stick to the plan in my head?!" I also have the same problem in class.People will just talk and talk while the teacher is trying to teach and I think "Why did you come here if you're just going to set yourself up to fail in life?Just stay home if you're going to act like an idiot because i don't want you dragging me down when your disruptions land you working at a dumpster."
LillyPotter352
RIGHT? And I especially cannot stand when I plan out a scenario and everything goes to plan.... except then I forget the scenario.
+Ria D. yup the struggle is real XD
Step 1: Plan your escape
I feel fully understood
Sometimes people think that the "i need time alone for recharge" is because you don't like them or you are avoiding them or you are too boring. But i just really need to be alone!!!
Huh this is actually quite correct.
I always get anxiety when people yell
anyone else?
Me too and I look around awkwardly having no idea about what to do
It's nice to know that I'm not alone in that department! Yeah, this happens to me all the time! Talking gently is my preventative measure to reduce the possibility of anything escalating to yelling, but I have really bad anxiety when people around me are yelling! Do you have any way of reducing that anxiety?
+Andrew Wysocki Well you could try avoiding these kind of situations by talking gently like you said. If you are talking to a friend you could ask them to speak more quietly but sometimes that doesn't work so maybe you can try getting out of the room or even put on headphones so you don't have to deal with them anymore lol. But for example if a teacher is yelling well.. you can't do much unfortunately. Try covering your ears I guess?
Glad I'm not alone either!
Hope this helps 😊
Omg same??? Like when someone yells at me I just cry
Everyone gets anxiety when they're being yelled at; it triggers the body's fight-or-flight response
Protip from an Introvert:
Get Drunk.
always works
The CoIRe what if you dont drink
Alcohol is essential for this protip to work
So what if you're not old enough to legally drink?
Katrijn Ooms live a little
going to a party in like one hour... wish me luck 😖✊🏼
Howd itgo?
Same, had to watch this before going 💀
@@SarahHugzBuddy i actually remember it going really well + met a childhood friend by coincidence! best of luck !!!
the fact that being alone is depressing for me probably means I'm just socially awkward, not introverted lol
MrMetalHead1100 not quite true. Everyone (excluding people with certain disorders, e.g. APD) gets lonely. Look up Eysenck's personality theory for a real explanation of introversion/extraversion that also covers neuroticism and psychoticism which were omitted from this video due to either a lack of research/understanding or for the sake of simplicity.
Saul Goodman, okay to be fair it's severe APD that removed a person from loneliness, as in crippling serial killer levels of APD. Not really a majority, more a minority amongst minority's. Oh, and I show up on the APD spectrum as well. Not yet established the severity of my case, but I don't really get loneliness. I don't quite understand it. I can mimic it fairly well though.
There are different types of introverts. Some genuinely don't like people, while some want to be alone but still wants company every now and then. Some introverts like being alone, but not feeling lonely in other words.
Ask the host if they need help? Are you nuts? 1, that sounds impossible and very stressful. You need to find out who the host is. You need to break expectations and rules to ask them, they'll most likely say no and just want you to enjoy yourself. 2. What will they think of you? Maybe they'll think you're trying to rob them or other people. Maybe they think you're trying to get closer to them. You never know! 3. The host is probably in a huge group of people and would be super intimidating to pull them away to ask this. And seriously, who would say they want help with stuff? 4. You have to talk to EVERYBODY at the party. You have to go up to people in the middle of doing something, ask for trash then answer the same questions over and over. "Why are you collecting trash?" "Are you with the host?" "Is the party ending early?" It's just so stressful.
I'm not sure who thought this was a good idea, but it wasn't an introvert.
Oh also I have complaints with finding introverts
If I was alone at a party the LAST thing I would want is someone coming up to me. Introverts wouldn't stick together, and joining a small group is stressful too. All the attention goes on you if they accept you, making you be more engaged, and if you're not, you just stand there while they continue talking about whatever else. I think GOING with other introverts is a better option. Honestly what were you guys thinking?
I knew from the first 10 seconds that an introvert didnt make this video
zaneomega2 there are many kinds of introvetrs tho, including the extrovert-like ones
Revi M Fadli that's not an introvert then... that is called an extrovert
Well it's also nice to help the host. The host most likely has a lot of stress too because of preparing cleaning up making sure everybody's happy. So it is relieving when the host gets help. Even if you're an introvert, you can help too.
The worst thing about parties is that they make me realize the difference between myself and others, between my anxiety and feeling awkward to them having fun, flirting and enjoying themselves. Really depresses me, because i want to be like them, but just can't.
I'd like to add another suggestion for party survival: Don't get high or drunk. A couple of beers.. sure. But don't get wasted. It will lower your self control which will help all those feelings of anxiety and stress come out. And trust me.. people will realize. One way or the other.
***** Because humans are social animals, and society is organized around that fact. It's the way of the world. And because of that, as Samurailord correctly said, extroverts are better suited to function in the world we live in.
It's a lot like early birds vs. night owls. Like it or not, the world seems to revolve around getting up early in the morning. Unfortunately, I'm a night owl. It makes it very hard to get along in the world. Everything seems to operate on the basis of being up and active in the morning. I'm a lawyer, and about 95% of my court appearances are in the morning. It's even worse for those of us on the west coast, which is three hours "behind" the east coast. If I need to call an insurance adjuster on the east coast and it's 2:00 in the afternoon here, it's already 5:00 pm over there and everyone's gone home for the day.
If the majority of people are a certain way, the rest of us unfortunately just have to "suck it up" and adapt. It's a struggle, but it's the way things are.
***** For many reasons. No matter if you wanna be successfull in your job, if you wanna get laid, make money as an enterpreneur or just live a happy and fullfilled life.. you need to be an extrovert for everything. At least as a man you are expected to be a dominant, alpha male bursting with self-confience, endless energy and a "i'll have it my way" attutide.
Samurailord
sorry man, but thats not true.
You can do this things even in a "introverted" way.
If you try to change yourself and behave different then you are you will only attract other people who try to hide their "true nature", instead of finding people and relationships with humans, who also went through hardships, but ultimately survived and found a way to "live" in their own way, instead of letting society change them.
Ugh your comment is so true it makes me even that much more aware of what sets me apart from other people... The worst part is knowing that there's really nothing to be done in order to change my personality...
***** What's that?
I'm an introvert with RBF and people always ask
"Are you okay?"
And I'm like....
"...... Peachy ....."
I'm not sure if I'm an introvert or just weird but I am very extroverted when I meet new people, I can make conversation with strangers really easily. But once I know someone and am obligated to make conversation with them I hate it. I also avoid large parties because they stress me out, unless I'm with people I have never met before at the party. Is that a thing or am I just crazy?
It is the same for me. I also think when you meet new people you always have something to talk about...like where they live and their hobbies....but when you know a person it becomes more difficult to start a conversation and find something to keep talking
An introvert with extroverted qualities (or vice versa) is called an ambivert, but basically the terms introvert and extrovert are basically whether you get stimulation from being alone or with other people. So people can be really social but will need alone time, and they will be introverts. However, I am SO introverted that it's not even funny anymore, and HATE parties, smalltalk, social situations etc
Maybe you’re an ambivert?
*Hannah M* you are an ambivert
Maybe you are both. (Ambivert)
Also, I think no one is a complete introvert or extrovert. I have a 95% of introverts characteristics and a 5% of extrovert characteristics.
For example I'm very shy when I have to give a presentation in front of my classmates. And I hate it.
But this year I had to go to a competition in which I had to GIVE A DANM PRESENTATION IN FRONT OF SCIENCE PROFESORS. I was really paranoic that day. But the magic happen and I did a "regular" presentation without Freaking out.
Also when I have to make new friends I am a total introvert. But talking to Stranger that I know I won't see them EVER IN MY LIFE is like magic happen and I look like an extrovert.
TOTALLY Weird my friend. What-What!?
I use the give yourself a job idea quite often. Before an event I ask the host or event planner if there is anything I can help with. It gives me something to do so I don't feel so self conscious. It also gives me an in to interact with others, especially when I have been asked to photograph an event. My camera is my prop! I am able to discuss photography with others. A camera is a good conversation starter!
you should have mentioned that there are also ambiverts like me. I can an introvert and extrovert at the same time depending on the situation and my mood.
Everyone is
Nobody is only extro/introvert all the time
I don't think you know how this works
Miky Ježek people on a autism spectrum are.
Ashkan Ahmadi Me too!!!
THAT IS LITERALLY EVERYONE YOU IDIOT, STOP TRYING TO BE SPECIAL, IF YOU WANNA BE SPECIAL, GET A HOBBY
I don't really feel insecure or afraid in any way at a party, just bored. I don't find anything to do (besides eating, which I could be doing alone on my own). I feel more irritated than anything, I hate the loud music, I hate loud places and people, I hate dancing and I hate the feeling of being in a group, thats why when I go out with friends I go with one at a time, never in groups, or even small groups. Just me and other friend. That's my limit
im an extrovert once a few shots have hit the back of my throat lolol
what kind of shots? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
...the white, sticky kind?
Mr Otaku that's my favourite kind ;)
Lang Kuoch ewwww lmao xD
Mr Otaku Hahah, you started it bro
i....do not like parties.
Agreed.
about the step three, if you're an introvert with social anxiety, this is really not gonna help you, like, helping with serving the food, oh my god, for me it's even worse than staying in a party for too long
because a lot of communication of offering food is non verbal. you bring a platter of food and they know what youre offering- easy.
***** can't relate. i would rather stand doing nothing than serving food, feeling like i'm bothering people, i would prolly do awkward thing, drop food or smtgh, i cant even imagine.
moose the awkward thing is getting their attention when theyre in a closed group :/
Kirothe Avenger that"s one of the thing i'd fear
***** good tips but most of the time i'm the one that over-react in my head and i feel ridiculous, i mean yea i can stay calm, thats what i always do at my best
I have noticed that it may be hard to want to go out and interact with people when your an introvert, but the more you do it the easier it becomes. It may not seem like it but you really can change who you are (for example an introvert can become an extrovert if they wanted to enough) and frankly the more you practice in social interactions the less awkward you become as well. It is never to late to change.
do introverts come in the "lesser introvert" model? because i like social things, especially with friends and sometimes i'm the hyped up in the group, but when it comes to strangers it's all different, i get quiet and just don't act silly or don't make stupid jokes... maybe it's just shyness? is it different or is it the same?
I'm an introvert too and I have exactly the same problems! when I'm with my best friend, I'm totaly different than in my class (I don't have real friends in my class...)
And sorry if there are some mistakes, I'm from Germany...😊
I'm an introvert too and I have exactly the same problems! when I'm with my best friend, I'm totaly different than in my class (I don't have real friends in my class...)
And sorry if there are some mistakes, I'm from Germany...😊
Yeah, i thought so. It's more of comfort zones with introverts, am i right?
Matthew Ford That's the definition of "introvert". Introverts are not autistic.
It happens to me too, I like going to places if I go with my friend or someone I know that isn't necessarily my friend, but if I don't know anybody there I'm like wtf can I do here and I just stay there like a lifeless body
yes! I've been doing all those things for years and some people don't even know I am an introvert. Learning to leave when I am not having fun and not feel ashamed of it was a breakthrough... so the first step is very important.
Only 30% are introverts? Wow
We are special... Kind of :D
We are unicorns ~❤
+Karen Flores Yeeeessss :DD
This still doesn't seem right, I was the only introvert in the school....
HammerBlow500 okay....
This video (especially the start where it explains things about introverts and extroverts) made me feel so much better! I am an introvert and quite shy as well and I always have these troubled thoughts about having to socialize! A tip to other introverts : it is true that we prefer small groups of people, so don't try to socialize by going to partys! You will shine when with the right people. (See! I always knew it is not bad to be an introvert! ahah I'm saying this to my mother who always pushes me to socilaize and go to partys and makes me feel even worse in the end!)
Im introvert and i have problem in socializing with others. That makes others think that im a snobbish person.
+Tterressa Abellera Don't worry, you're not alone. That's exactly how I feel :(
xXDisneyFanAtHeartXx we should hangout together 😀😀😀
Yeah :D I think we'd be perfect friends
xXDisneyFanAtHeartXx i think it would be great
me too :)
I'm introvert,and on my 11 birthday i escaped and sat in car wondering when tf will people leave...they broke EVERYTHING in my room......
dicks...
Those people really weren't considerate...
Klara Djordjevic Fuck where those your friends?
not any more
theyre dead now
Locks are your friends
I had this school party i had to attend (literally no excuses allowed) and when i arrived i just hid in the bathroom the whole time until it was over, many people asked me where i was that night, i kinda ignored them but oh well
I sat outside looking at kittens. Sad life we're having bud.
Oh my god I completely understand that. At school I sit nearly every lunch break in the bathroom because I want to.. escape? or to hide I guess.. I hardly doubt my friends even notice that
omg that's sooo me!
always when my one best friend was staying home and I was left completely alone at school (the rest of the school's population does not count of course), I always used to go to the bathroom every break and lock myself up in a toilet cabin until the break was over and classes began... again and again... ;-;
Omg this randomly just reminded me i was at a friends house and there were like 10 of us and i went upstairs to go to the toilet and on the way back i found their dog and just sat on the floor with it for like 15 minutes cause i didnt want to talk to people 😂
Here are more tips :)
1.) if u wanna leave just call your mom and pretend that your mom wants you to come home
2.) if you need a breather go to the bathroom
3.) come early so you know where the bathroom and other places in the house
4.) if you feel anxious or drained leave, it’s not worth it
5.) if your not having fun leave it’s fine
Or you could follow my one easy step: Never go to parties. Don't feel pushed to do these things if you really don't want to. Don't let extroverts push you around.
yusuke are you and kolabara lovers or how ever you spell it you seem like it
As an introvert i could say: I want to go to parties and enjoy. I don't feel push, i just want to get some drink and have a nice night. But if i don't match, or know someone... fuck off, i tried it.
Introverts aren't antisocial (generally)
Btw: alcohol helps. Weed: .... sometimes, it's complicated.
***** I used to drink a lot to force myself to be an extrovert and developed a drinking problem. Why? Because I was making friends with alcoholic extroverts and had to drink to keep up and "be fun". Now I don't drink at all and have done some serious housecleaning with those "friends". I like other introverts and a big party to them is a dinner with 8-10 close friends (those don't happen very often). I agree with OP, don't go to parties if they make you unhappy. Using chemicals to force yourself into being something you are not for other people who don't really care to understand you is not worth it. :)
Simon The Digger YES!!!
BRING A GOOD FRIEND WHO DOESNT KNOW ANYONE EITHER, THIS HELPS EASE THE PRESSURE OR TENSION
STEP 2: TYPE IN CAPS TO GRAB ATTENTION
STEP 3: POINT OUT THE OBVIOUS!
Ryan Syn STEP 4: ????
siloPIRATE STEP 5: PROFIT
I would do literally anything this voice tells me to do.
Annnnything?
Hand Sanitizer Attack
While I'm not even trying to make it sexual... ANNNNYTHING.
Anything?
If the voice told you to eat your hands, would you do it?
Thanks! These tips will help me! I am an introvert married to an extrovert. He gets invited to parties and loves for me to come too. He knows it's hard for me and exhausting. He always give me the control to decide when to leave, but maybe with these tips, I will be able to enjoy myself a little longer before making the great escape.
3:35 The restrooms! Once I spent half a party hidden the restrooms playing games in my phone.
I stick around a corner and do my stuff, which is playing games, or was.
Magalí Fernández Then why did u go to the party
Rey Río Because it was my friend's 15th Birthday Party (That's some serious shit here)
Aah la quinceañera, no?
Rey Río Si xD
Im an introvert with an extremely extroverted personality. I can be the life of the party, give speeches in front of thousands of people no problem. However, I only have short spurts of energy to do this before I become "brain dead" where I need my alone time. Once my energy is drained I can be cranky and moody. I always wanted to badly to compete for the center of attention with extroverts for popularity but im now realizing that im in a losing race. MY brain chemistry and energy level always gets depleted whenever i try to participate in large social activities or popularity contests.
Same, honestly.
+El Gringo Dude same. When I talk to someone in a group of people I don't know, I may have the energy to show off to all of them. But then later on I lose interest and I just don't wanna talk to them anymore. I mean I wanna talk to people and don't wanna be alone, make friends, but then feel like I don't want to move on with it. Is this normal :( ?
+Triple D seems like you are my clone, im having the exact same problem. Whenever im in groups with 3-5 people i feel comftable and even can laugh a lot. But when im alone with another one or a girl, i have to think of everything twice about what i want to say. The result is that i never have good converstations with people moreover they dont really want to do something with me plus i dont get a a grilfriend easily.
felix ml Yeah I can handle it if another guy or girl comes in but I just lose my interest after awhile like I wanna go somewhere else
+El Gringo Same, I'm usually the sarcastic, punny friend that cracks most of the jokes to get people laughing. Though I love seeing and making people happy, just being in a huge, crowded environment drains me and I've even had anxiety attacks in the past because of it. However, something I've discovered for myself to help me stay calm in huge places has helped. Like reading alone at a cafe or restaurant, people will leave me alone, and sometimes another introvert or book lover in general will come over and talk to me about my book. Or going to a concert that I would love to go to, but there is too many faces there and it's all cramped. I only go to those with a maximum of two close friends, or I go by myself. I also live in PA, so most concerts take place in large fields, people who stand or sit in the fields pay less, this is what me and other introverts do since it's not cramped and you get to see all of the light and stage work. Sorry for the long post that probably doesn't have much to do with your comment. Have a good one, now.
not sure if im introvert or anti-social-no-life-shit
honestly same
same unless you're some kind of strange very shy extrovert but i doubt that could be called extrovert. so yeah you're introvert
but then again seeing how you're negative about life with little/no friends you might be a mix, you should be enjoying your hobbies if you're introvert maybe books/movies, maybe your job, drawing,gaming, research, anime,
(again i dont know how/why would you not have friends now) if you really dont enjoy much in your life try to overcome and get social life, you can watch tutorials on youtube, or/and you should research and try more things/hobbies to see what you enjoy, i have few friends and barely see them but i have a ton of hobbies so if i get bored of one i get another (carpentry,gaming, movies,tv series,anime,books,manga,work,drawing,youtube vids, music, etc)
gytis dramblewolfskis
my problem is that even if i want to talk to people (lets say on a break in school or break in work) and we are in a group and they are talking about something... most of the times i just have no idea what to say except "yea, mhm, aha, sure, mmm ye right" :|
Suvvri well in a group it's harder as other people might have something better to say, they will remember your bad interaction more etc, better try to do conversations with 1 person again watch tutorials, first i watched few videos of how to get friends then i got recomendations to improve social skills,like how to continue conversation which is what you lack most i guess.
i like mickael valmont videos.
first you gotta have few hobbies,like you play guitar in your vids and you are kind of a youtuber which can help you continue conversation few times,and more importantly you're more interesting if you got are passionate about something. And you're supposed to talk about stuff you don't know much about as well(small talk), everything should slowly improve if you get into many interactions, and get a little guidance,(the videos)
looks can help too btw.
That's how it goes for us, we prefer to talk about things that we can think about. Small talk is mostly just a waste of time and we can't focus on it, especially with multiple people. I haven't really had a close friend while at school, but at uni I found a guy I could easily talk to (it was still near impossible for us to talk while in a group though). Eventually you'll find someone too but before you do, survive :D
I never went to a public party before in my life. 🤔
I CONSTANTLY tell my extrovert friend that quote "It's not that i want to be alone, i want to be left alone" and she always gets offended and thinks i hate her and everyone around me .____.
I hate parties. Can't we just hang out, drink beer, and watch Netflix?
dramasweety I agree. At parties there's too much pressure to dance. I don't dance, and other people get offended and upset when I tell them this.
I am living the life of a introvert
living alone
no friends
I want excitement in my life
I want human interaction
and people mistake me for a
introvert
Crave human interaction
Try to socialise
Realise people are dicks
Retreat to solidarity
Repeat
Paramesh Subramoni same
GamesAndGains lol! so true.
Ever tried joining a sports club or something similar?
You meet new people and mostly they also do things outside of sport or club activities together.
At first it feels akward but in the end you really expanded your social circle. :)
If you need friends come and watch my channel. All... 80 of us...
0:05
The extrovert
Complains about the music and how its horrible
The introvert walks up to the extrovert and says
*"Hold My beer"*
I always find bringing a shovel to a party is useful.
Ikr, insanely helpful in finding an escape route.
Escape rope for getting away from all the Zubats in the world.
Ryan Whiteman minecraft parties don't count
Okay Starfire.
Ryan Whiteman to bury the bodies?
As a 32 year old introvert I know these steps work. I kind of figured them out on my own. Still can't go to a club or something like that with a lot of people. Thick crowds, loud music, blinking lights etc... But a normal party, sure.
And alcohol doesn't work. Unless you drink yourself until you pass out. That usually isn't fun though.
I've heard people say they go to casinos because of the lights and noise. I don't get it. :-(
Noise cancelling headphones work
Anybody else here been called anti-social by their friends??
Everyone calls me antisocial but you just have to accept it. It's not going to go away no matter how hard you try. It's in you mind.
My friend has anxiety problems and said that I was worst than her a socialising...
+Danique Hoekstra oh god yes T.T
+Akira dreemurr lol? people that aren't your friends can still call you an anti social ;-;
u know wats worse than being called anti social being called quiet.i feelkilling everyone who calls me that
Still one of my favorite channels that really got me through some hard times. Wish it was still active.