Yeah it’s very mentally I’ll the amount of guilt tripping and manipulation they display. personal trainer admitted to be jealous of me and the owner has talked smacked about me to my face and behind my back while I stay in the same room. Yeah totally normal brotherly behavior. I stay positive and god driven and willing to change like the stories of those of the Book of Daniel. It’s an amazing feat imo for me to continuously rise to higher vibrations than they impose on me.
Yeah it’s very mentally I’ll the amount of guilt tripping and manipulation they display. personal trainer admitted to be jealous of me and the owner has talked smacked about me to my face and behind my back while I stay in the same room. Yeah totally normal brotherly behavior. I stay positive and god driven and willing to change like the stories of those of the Book of Daniel. It’s an amazing feat imo for me to continuously rise to higher vibrations than they impose on me.
The most dangerous ones who could feel envy towards us are our own relatives (not my immediate family). Been there. Now, I am hundred miles away from them.
Yeah I can vouch. Had a distant relative (con artist) come to “help” me care for my grandpa when he had a stroke in my 20s. No one would come and help us and she got into his head and said she would come help. Bad idea. Grandpa told a friend before he died “I made a mistake”. That con artist not only stole his legacy (and my healthy trust fund he was passing on), but she isolated him so much, I was having to call to find him almost every day. Found out he was usually in the house but they were disconnecting the phone and leaving him or buying up all sorts of cars and things. I still feel guilt because I had moved to Canada and was fighting for him remotely. He was my best friend. I trust no one. ❤
Always listen to your intuition. Some people will come into your life to sabotage you. It doesn’t matter why they’re jealous of you it’s your job to discern who they are, and keep them at arms length.
It is not envy in a sense that they want "the same thing", it is more that, they think so low of you that they don't think you deserve it. They think you are a "peasant", and you don't deserve good things to happen to you. They just use you to pass their time and to stimulate themselves. It is a hard realization when it hits you.
They can and will destroy your life if you’re not aware just how dangerous they can be. I turned the other cheek many times as I’m loyal to those close to me. I’m a total loner now. I would never have believed it possible that people are often more full,of hate than love
If you are a sensitive person you are going to quickly realize that most people are fake and only get close to you because they want something out of you, the result is you become a loner coz you can't deal with fakeness.
Sad reality. I am beginning to believe there are more people who lack integrity than those who possess it. I know no one is perfect and we can all do things when we are en route to becoming adults that can hurt others even when we don’t realise it, or have not yet matured enough to understand the consequences. But, I am seeing most seems to never mature into adults with the real ability for empathy and never seemed to develop conscience. Selfishness at all costs seems to be most peoples blueprint for living their lives.
When you experience a non genuine friend/friends in your life, you become a loner and very protective of your space. I like to think that everyone can grow and change but you have to put the work in to become a good person/better version of yourself.
Take notes to what he is saying BE MINDFUL WHO YOU SHARE YOUR BUSINESS WITH stay away from people who secretly judge and are dedicated to misunderstand you stop being vulnerable to FAKE FRIENDS STOP SHARING SO MUCH OF YOUR THOUGHTS AND PROBLEMS with people pretend to love and care NOT EVERYONE IS DESERVING OF YOUR Vulnerability
No envy is drinking your own vial of poison and expecting the other person to die. And Jesus Christ says “No Weapon formed against His Saints will prosper”…
You have to maintain a crisp baseline understanding that there are no "gods" out there. ANYBODY who seems too good to be true...is. The more overwhelmingly intoxicating somebody is at first blush, the quicker you should run for the hills. Find somebody boring who mounts no campaign to conquer you.
Beware of being love-bombed. It's intoxicating when it happens, and these people can come to us when we're very vulnerable, like when we're in a state of grief. As Robert says, that kind of rapid intensity isn't natural, but when we're stumbling, we can fall prey to it. You can watch out for it, but there's no real protection. It's just life. When it occurs, try to love yourself through it.
My mother inlaw had some pictures of myself with my little sister, and she showed me the face, in many pictures she had that face looking at me, I did some tests to see if my mother inlaw was correct, well my heart was hurt, my little sister did indeed secretly hate me, I later found out that she was secretly behind my back going to my mum and older sister gossiping about me, then coming to my face with a smile. She passively aggressively bullied me then gaslight me, I didn't notice because I love her still do, what hurts is I actually gave her my life, I gave her more then half my wages when she was a young teenager, made sure I went around other girls to let them know don't mess with my sister. And deep down, she actually hated me FOR NOTHING, not just that, but gossiped to family about me. She was sending provocative pictures to a guy I was chatting with, then when I confronted her, she point blank Said "why r u jealous" so nasty, by the way she had a boy friend with a child to him, which i have never revealed what she was doing. I didn't understand because I would of took her side no matter what. I finally now say no to he. Myy boundaries r fully up with love and compassion. I literally gave her my unconditional love my life, and all the while she was playing me and lying about me, but coming to me as a victim of everyone. Now I am apparently evil because I finally found my worth and say NO. The funny thing is my mother inlaw spotted it.
You’re not alone . I’ve had family , those I unconditionally gave to and expected nothing who turned on me once I didn’t do exactly as they expected . It was clear that their relationship with me was conditional .
"you can murdered for it (envy)". In present day, they turn people against you, exclude you, subtle slights about you in your pack. So, do we tone our natural selves down or find people more like us? Outshining my Master seems to be my invisible superpower...so invisible I don't see it. Some people love me, some HATE me (but want to be me).
Science would NEVER move FORWARD if scientists embraced this crappy mantra “Never outshine the master” A TRUE master wants you to outshine them. The FAKES want you small and NOT outshining them !
A guy I knew over 20 years sabotaged personal and business relationships i was trying to make. It was envy of what might happen. It hurt to part ways until i realized what he'd done for so long.
Succeed on your own terms regardless if people are envious of you or not. The problem is when you take that shit personally which you never should. What you should do is to just stay focused on your career and purpose, period and nothing and no one else. This is actually a must, as Robert has nicely put it; "You're not going to get rid of envy". Thus, it's just better to embrace it all the time and never take it personally. Let envious people be the pathetic losers that they are instead. They will die on the inside while you shine bright in your own light.
Agreed! Jealousy and envy are normal human emotions that we all have, hence the notion of never taking it personal! Two issues I see, individuals who claim that they have people around them that are jealous of them can also be suffering from a little bit of narcissism, jealousy and envy at times can be not so easy to detect at first so people need to have enough self awareness to be accurate in their assessment! Secondly, I’m a little more understanding of someone’s perceived jealousy or envy towards me or other people! Who knows someone’s genetics, upbringing and environment?!?!? Where I don’t believe in a world of freewill then I’ve become a bit more empathetic towards someone’s hate even towards me! But as I sense it, I deal with that person accordingly, because as discussed, these people will literally ruin your life! It’s up to us as individuals to use our jealousy and envy appropriately and to not let it destroy us!
I have had so many issues with this. One girl even tried to poke holes in my relationship because she was jealous of my relationship, the whole friendship was a disaster downward spiral. Im extremely cautious now, a friend recently said “your so lucky you don’t have to deal with work” and I immediately withdrew form the conversation. I know if i feel envious it means I probably want something they have, but i have enough faith to know if it was meant for me I’ll have it or that i can work towards and have what they have anyway, so it doesn’t last long at all. My paranoia is that 90% of people seem to not be able to do the same..
I felt with jealousy constantly growing up. I allowed them to make me average like them when clearly I was meant to surpass them. Sorry not sorry. I now don’t tolerate any negatively and any person that’s envious . I get rid of them immediately. I’ve worked too hard to be who I am and I had to kick many people out of my life to do it. I don’t think I’m better than them in a human level but they just couldn’t go where I was going, where I am now.
ALL the time ...my whole life I have heard that. I never subscribed to that. I tried to deny that it was jealousy. I would think that perhaps I had inadvertently offended them? I don't like to intentionally draw attention to myself. When I hear "oh their jelous of you," I cry inside because I know it's just a matter of time before the spiritual attacks from that person begins. Then the sabotage, backstabbing...😢
IDC.... I myself have always been a secure individual; it was always outside forces trying to make me feel insecure due to however they deep down felt about THEMSELVES‼I can say 100% I haven't ever been envious of anyone. I just always believed if someone had something I didn't, that I wanted is to ACTUALLY WORK FOR THE LIKING OF THAT THING. Never take from others or hate on others because it blocks your own blessings 💯 It's funny how frenemies aren't only friends/associates but "family" too‼
There is always a Judas. A snake 🐍 in the grass who wants to lead you down the garden path. It’s always a friend who hates you the most. A wolf 🐺 in sheep’s clothes. A wise man can get more from his enemies that a fool can from his friends. Your enemies enemies are your friends. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
Schadenfreude and Mitfreude are German expressions. Honestly, as a German woman, I believe my people invented the concept of being envious. It‘s part of the culture and it‘s repulsive to me. I dislike so many envious people right now. They lurk everywhere in my surrounding.
Have had to learn very hard lessons about these people, they say and do the most horrific of things to you, manipulate you, always in competition, always gossiping behind your back. .. . .fake apologies. You try and cut them off and they feel as though they have been wronged. You can help and support these people but their behaviour reverts back to toxicity. They feel entitled to your help. The behaviours caused a lot of distress. Never again! As soon as I detect any toxicity, I distance myself quick sharp! Includes family members
Once you start surrounding yourself with winners & visionaries, your mindset will change and you'll start to have faith in the dreams God/Yeshua/Buddha/Allah/Krishna/The Great Spirit gave you, and they will actually come to pass. The more your circle decreases, the more your peace increases. You're always "acting funny", when you don’t do what they want you to do. You can't take everyone on YOUR journey: it's not your responsibility. Friends and family are the people who resist your personal development the most. Misery loves company. Be modest on broadcasting your victories successes, because it fosters animosity and jealousy among some family and friends. Eat well, dress impeccably at all times, exercise, and always greet people with a warm smile. Nothing beats the power of a positive attitude.
Someone said to me recently that an envious person will triangulate you, villainize you, then rescue the third person and become the hero. I steered clear of this person for a long time- they finally apologized after saying some nasty things and I let them in a tiny bit only to be met with still clear envy via gossip and lies…and hurting others in the process. I stay silent with the exception of a few close friends that I vented to- now it’s time to move on. More will always be revealed
I started withdrawing from a migh-maintenance, demanding "friendship" after I realized how much I missed being alone. She began phasing me out of the social circle and did so successfully. I've gone back to our hairdresser to learn that she has spread derogatory rumors around town. Thank god I moved out of that shithole of a place. I'm so much happier today..
Envy is a message that we want something like that for ourselves & what we should perhaps work towards. Unfortunately most people utilize envy as a form of comparison & measure their own worth by what OTHER people have. That’s when it’s dangerous. I think I’m lucky in that I naturally want everyone to be happy & succeed because I see it as contributing to overall world happiness & possibly peace. In the few times I feel envy I’m thinking to myself “I’m happy for them for having XYZ, and I don’t want to take it from them, nor do I assume they came about it by nefarious means, but I’d like to have it also. And perhaps, if possible, I will ask how they achieved it. Misery loves company & I feel so sorry for people who believe that others succeeding means that they are failing. Comparison is the thief of joy.
That last bit really hit home. I stopped sharing my achievements with old friends. I talk shop with a stranger half a world away since 99% of the people who supposedly love me never even ask to see my work.
It's great that this clip has made so many people in the comments turn their awareness toward people who are or have been envious of them and that they are committed to not allowing envious people in their lives, but have they been willing to acknowledge and consider their own enviousness?
I'd like to add that there are people who exhibit this drama or negative complaint not because they are the problem but because they depend on those who also infected them with this mentality and they are under a lot of stress. I think everyone vents when undergoing stress. And when you are surrounded by people who is like this in the first place you develop a beehive mentality. And then you realize oh god, what happened to me? There is a saying "don't bite the hand that feeds you". And it's not always as easy as cut them off. Whether they be family members or boss or co workers. People do have circumstances that forces them to interact with toxic people. And honestly it's really hard to just ignore them
envy for the good and positive things that a person has achieved so that you can be motivated to do better, not to hurt that person but use Envy as encouragement.
I don’t think there’s a positive connotation to the term envy. If you want to be motivated by someone or their achievements, then they are your inspiration which seems more seems the positive form of envy. Envy to me, sits right along with jealousy which can both turn a person dangerous if not controlled.
Bad friends teach you bad habits wit mostly negative thoughts & emotions. Good friends teach you good habits with mostly positive thoughts & emotions. Slowly keep busy and lessen your interactions with them. Always have an excuse to not meet them. Hopefully eventually they will get the hint.
@EYRM9 amen You’re preaching to the choir and I’d like to add The world is not my home and my life is not my own. ☦️ God said 👇🏾 The Great I Am is in your core. The Great I AM is the Light. Even when I’m hidden still I AM. I AM the flower, wind, rain, sinju, marrow, rock, author, maker, the touch that set in motion all that you see, all that you know, all that you don’t see or know. I knit you, I put breath in you, I’m coded in every cell, every nano second of time falls in step as I will it so, I AM in you, I AM all, even when you perceive nothing still I AM there. ⚔️🛡️☦️🤍☝🏾
I’m 71 years old and have experienced having frenemies in my life from time to time. Some friends have started out as true friends but at some point became a frenemy. Long story short, the parents of a good friend of mine went through a very acrimonious divorce when he and I were 14. The divorce made him very bitter and cynical and he was envious of kids like me who lived in a stable and loving home. This boy did all sorts of mean things to me and it got to the point where I transferred to a different high school to get away from him. As a senior and having gone through many relationships in my life I am more leery of people and their intentions and am careful who I let into my life. Actually the only two people I know now who I completely trust are my wife and my best friend. I’ve been let down by too many people in my 71 years and it has jaded me somewhat.
Proverb 26:24-26 Enemies disguise themselves with their lips, but in their hearts they harbor deceit. 25 Though their speech is charming, do not believe them, for seven abominations fill their hearts. 26 Their malice may be concealed by deception, but their wickedness will be exposed in the assembly.
Some people were subject to serious/severe abuse in the past though, so openly talking about that does not make them a "drama queen/king"... which is precisely what the abuser/malignant NPD case (or whoever) would love for all to perceive them as. So, let's not get that twisted.
This just happened to me,, all the signs were there, i came to the maximum limit and ended tat friendship today. How the hell youtube recommended this just after that
I know it's not the main point, but it was nice how Robert made it clear that some people just have bad luck. If you genuinely think someone's a good egg don't let people tell you otherwise. Those will be your best relationships if you're willing to be understanding and useful.
The people who are there for you when you are in a difficult place, maybe health wise for example. They get a kick out of your pain and feel superior because they feel inferior. When that person has something good happen to them, they feel better and the toxic friend feels annoyed and frustrated and ultimately envy. Their fragile persona can’t cope with the power shift.
Actually he "looks" like a man who's been through life's mill, paid his dues, shows the scars and has rich experience to share, and the talent to express it in a highly articulate way. Also, he "looks" like a person who doesn't glibly come up with shallow, vacuous observations from any armchair of self-gratifying, dues-free sarcasm. That's just my own impression, of course.
Be very careful whom you let in. Your energy is precious. Do not just drop your boundaries when lower vibrational people suddenly want to become your bestie. Be selective and picky. Real friends are few and far between. Remember that. Not everyone you meet is meant to stay.
I’m confused about the concept of hanging out with insecure people will make more insecure and hanging out with confident people makes you more confident. It makes sense on the surface, but when I actually think about it, it seems that most people are insecure about one thing or another. So it seems to me that if you’re hanging out with more confident people it’s good for you but bad for them because their confidence might be effected by your insecurities. And he talks as hanging out with people who are better than you is something you should do as something that is good for you. But aren’t you harming those same people? Can anyone help me understand this
This is very good advice, actually. The two difficulties you're having are, 1) interpreting the word "better" in a somewhat superficial way, and, 2) a failure to adequately consider the alternative. About the first, "better" doesn't mean "self-flauntingly, boastingly better." That would NOT be "better" people. Rather, people who are "better" are those with a solid, mature, healthily integrated self-understanding, a healthy altruism (which means, they're also not anybody's doormats), a healthy ambition in life to keep pushing themselves for more learning, discovery and rich exploitation of their own gifts in ways that contribute to the lives of many others. THAT is "better" and there is NO downside to trying to associate with, learn from, emulate such people. Don't confuse "confidence" of the best kind with narcissism. He's not saying, of course, 'Go out and find a bunch of narcissists to associate with." So, no, it's definitely NOT bad advice to spend time with the most healthily confident people you can. About the second, your failure to adequately consider the alternative. Usually when a concept presents some difficulties to comprehension, a very helpful trick is to imagine its extremes, so that the concept becomes stark and easily identifiable. So consider the alternative in the extreme: you can't really believe that there would be any upside to surrounding yourself and immersing yourself, your whole life, in a circle of people who are all plagued and riddled with crippling insecurities, jealousies, envy, mutual suspicion, petty rivalries, laziness and a refusal to get up and TRY, all of them scrambling after their perception of the biggest piece of a pathetically miserable small pie, ready to stab each other in the back to be the Big Fish in their fetidly ingrown small pond. You think you'd do yourself, or them, any good by wasting your life among them, ESPECIALLY by the way, if you did it with the notion "Okay, at least I'm 'better' than this crowd, so by being with them I'll improve them"? (As if they wouldn't read that right away, and you can imagine how they'd just lo-o-ove that.) I think that pretty much settles that. As for your last question. Again, what do you mean "people who are better than you"? If you mean they're TELLING you they're better than you, then guess what: they're not better than you. If you mean, more experienced, more wise, well-balanced, genuinely helpful and adept at maintaining boundaries, then, don't worry, Rocky, you won't be able to harm them by associating with them even if you wanted to (and we'll assume it's not your purpose to want to, right?).
@@kensears5099you’re missing Rocky’s point, if person A decides to drop his group of misfits let’s call them group B, to hang out with group C that he believes are of a better quality by the standards set in the video… won’t group C look at him as being from Group B and not on their level. So basically they would either welcome him or reject him. Essentially becoming what he did to those in group B, judge and jury. The irony. Robert has this wrong, and it’s vile when ppl dump friends for being misfits, that’s not friendship it’s just a transaction.. what can u do to better me. Or I’m out. This is why soo many ppl abandon friends when they fall, or when they become rich. Then sell the idea to others like it’s a net positive, when in reality they traded it in for more shallow relationships
Some people have actually gone through things. The world already tells you to pack it all away. Maybe why suicide rate is somhigh. People only want the happy, light bouncy energy talking how amazing life is constantly. I like hearing from authentic people. Not just those with lives of ease.
But if you learn to love and feel brain heart coherence, your life becomes so much easier or even say compliment to people who are happy, because if they manage to be happy or happily married they actually inspire many other people to do the same. Some explain that love and compassion can be also very infesious, in positive way, because its human nature.
It’s a bit odd how the speaker keeps saying that envy and lack of happiness for other people is so normal compared with being happy for people. It is natural to be happy for others. Moreover - we all have control over our emotions, and can choose to be happy for others and not go down the path of envy. Sure, chimps feel envy. But we’re not chimps. We have the power to choose good, and we should. Even when it’s hard.
I absolutely love Robert Greene and have several of his books. I agree with much of what he says, but respectfully disagree with some of his points here. Yes, envy/jealousy are unfortunately human traits, albeit lower energy level. But this is NOT natural or a default state to be in. Those who choose to play victim, are insecure, blame everyone/everything for their lives, or refuse to do work on themselves to heal their past traumas will of course display these lower human qualities. But the default state of human beings is love, kindness, compassion, community, honesty, etc. - characteristics that are very vivid in innocent children who still have that purity in them. Unfortunately we lose sight of these traits as we grow up, when falling victim to toxic environments (family, friends, school, career, etc). True that many have suffered horrific situations in their lives, and the pain and trauma they've gone through is very very real. We've all experienced this. But ultimately it is each and every one of our responsibilities to work on ourselves to heal from those traumas so that our inner love and kindness may resurface - that includes forgiving our little selves and what we've been through, forgiving (i.e. letting go, detaching from) those who've hurt us, whether family, friends, coworkers, partners etc. Basically cutting cords with all who no longer serve a purpose in our lives; wiping the slate clean to allow more aligned, kind, compassionate individuals and circumstances to enter our lives; and working on changing our lives for the better. Hurt people hurt people, but healed people also heal people ... remember that :) Sending love to everyone - wherever you are. May we all stay safe, away from evil people and environments, and work to be the best version of ourselves each and every day ♥
It is not true that everybody feels envy. There are people that do not feel envy and that is hard for them to even understand how it feels to be envious. I see more people celebrating people’s victories than failures
Unfortunately for myself, I’m simply a person, who bad things happen to. I seem to have a lot of problems with people, by probably a few major factors, like merely being civil, being alone (predatory people love this), and racial and gender factors play their part. I do work to save myself and mitigate people, however. I don’t like talking about it, for the purpose of just talking about it. I also don’t see it as my problem, that I don’t comply, with what people want from me. What they typically have wanted are things like free caregiving or, perhaps, a free place to live. Since that’s a no, yes, I’m the problem. I hat I’ve learned, however, is the key to it is to not simply mitigate people with strong boundaries, but to just not say anything. You must suffer in silence, until you’ve rid yourself of them, because no one has any empathy for you anyway. Often, they will side, with the person who’s trying to use you actually. They may often feel you should give up your life, to become a vessel for use. You may also be conveying the problem - to someone else, who also intends to be a problem. Where frenemies are concerned, even though I’ve had some successes and done some things, I don’t think I’ve done a great deal. But then, comes the people who have done absolutely nothing. They are also the types that don’t want to do what you’re doing, but they either still want what you have or they want to destroy what you have. Even the types that don’t want what you want, but simply don’t want you to have it either. And I’ve definitely met the type and been the target of, “I know you have your nice career going and your life seems to be comfortable. But, I’d feel more comfortable with you, if you played nursemaid to me, since I didn’t make any plans for my own care. By the way, you are GOING to be doing that.” Yeah, keep the fantasy going. So, what is the key? Be scarce. Learn how to be comfortable, celebrating your successes alone. Because quite often, even your own mother is not happy with those successes. Mine tried to destroy mine.
The backhanded compliments is the indicator for me to walk away with no explanation n don’t make a sound or explain n when they hit you up just tell I don’t want to talk to you ..I was relieved when I did that n I’m way better n I promised myself that my gut is valid n to listen to myself n I’m important enough to be honest with myself and what I want ..I am an asset now rather than a liability.
Believe it or not but I learned this by myself when I was a little kid. When I turned thirty I became enlightened spiritually and the weird thing is I never ever practice any spirituality hmmm after that awakening ten years ago concepts like this are so clear to me and then I realized that maybe Mr green is enlightened too and then I started seeing noticing the only difference between people awaken or sleep. Cheers
I remember reading a piece in Time magazine back in the late 1980s or 1990s about a conference on the subject of Envy Sickness that was going be held in Portugal.
I gotta say some people, who open up their problem, aren't necessarily insecure. Often, insecure people are loud and bias. Those perceived to be negative are usually too honest to a fault that can be draining at times. All they need is to be heard and probably some suggestions would help that person a lot. Charming people are happy to be with but may not be there when you are vulnerable or at lows; AND don't easily brush off people that have opinions and being vulnerable with you, relationships aren't black & white. So yes, we need to read people but that takes a loooong time to finally say, yes this person resonates with me or toxic 😛
I can’t remember which one envy or jealousy but one is I want what you have but the other is I want what you have and I don’t want you to have it either
I have a friend, a really close friend that like criticizing everything about me. From my decisions, my vocabulary, my behavior and my work ethic. It’s like she loves making me feel bad about who I am when I’m already not feeling good about myself. Multiple times I told her I want to stop being friends with her but she always make me feel like I’ve done something wrong and the I’ve done her wrong and she cries victim to my mom everytime trying to remain friends with me. I’ve grown to have resentment towards her and I wish she would get the f**** out my life.
I know it’s not the point but the thumbnail with Sophia Loren looking at Jayne Mansfield is often very misconstrued, at least according to Sophia Loren.
I saw it first hand recently. I met this person on a holiday. She was married but never hardly got any attention. Sadly I got some and she was so envious and tried to tell this guy that was interested in speaking me, that I had “ stomach issues” right in front of me. Still didn’t work, still continued to pursue me and every man that would smile my way, you could see the jealousy in her eyes. 😂 Your girl is a plain Jane so I’m not saying I’m gorgeous… but I can’t man. The people you meet.
that photo of Sophia Loren has absolutely nothing to do with envy. it has to do with the fact that Sophia was afraid that Jane Mansfield’s breasts were about to pop out of her dress.
hum.... when somebody tells me something good happened to her/him I feel happy. I really don't go through the envious stage before. the few times I thought it wasn't fair was because I knew first hand the person didn't deserve it, cheated, or something. for example when one of my friends in college succeeded and I knew she stole an other friend's course note, and this other friend couldn't study properly and failed. yeah, I was like "I am happy for you" I think I am very naive.
I dont believe anyone is all good or all bad. Sometimes it’s something beyond what we can see or have knowledge of at the time. It’s like not knowing your dad was as abusive or a sister/cousin whoever. But once you know then you can speak up. Or people being immoral. No we’re not god to judge but you can speak up and say something
Is Envy more of a problem today? Are You having that problem with your friends?
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The logic of envy is ugly .... like its the worst thing ever ....
Envy is a true sickness of the soul.
Yeah it’s very mentally I’ll the amount of guilt tripping and manipulation they display. personal trainer admitted to be jealous of me and the owner has talked smacked about me to my face and behind my back while I stay in the same room. Yeah totally normal brotherly behavior. I stay positive and god driven and willing to change like the stories of those of the Book of Daniel. It’s an amazing feat imo for me to continuously rise to higher vibrations than they impose on me.
Yeah it’s very mentally I’ll the amount of guilt tripping and manipulation they display. personal trainer admitted to be jealous of me and the owner has talked smacked about me to my face and behind my back while I stay in the same room. Yeah totally normal brotherly behavior. I stay positive and god driven and willing to change like the stories of those of the Book of Daniel. It’s an amazing feat imo for me to continuously rise to higher vibrations than they impose on me.
Once I sense an envy person around me, that person then has almost no chance to get close to me.
It’s dangerous.
💯
Very very wise
Everyone is envious to a degree.
@@xXyasabeXx that’s what ‘envious to a degree’ people would say. I take it you know every individual on the planet 🌎 wow 🤩.
The most dangerous ones who could feel envy towards us are our own relatives (not my immediate family). Been there. Now, I am hundred miles away from them.
Not all of them though. I understand where you coming from.
Struggling with this atm!
Female cousins.
You’re lucky
Yeah I can vouch. Had a distant relative (con artist) come to “help” me care for my grandpa when he had a stroke in my 20s. No one would come and help us and she got into his head and said she would come help. Bad idea. Grandpa told a friend before he died “I made a mistake”. That con artist not only stole his legacy (and my healthy trust fund he was passing on), but she isolated him so much, I was having to call to find him almost every day. Found out he was usually in the house but they were disconnecting the phone and leaving him or buying up all sorts of cars and things. I still feel guilt because I had moved to Canada and was fighting for him remotely. He was my best friend. I trust no one. ❤
Level up = lose friends …Stagnate = keep friends
And relatives unless it goes within their interests
So well put !
@@JusteSekilfo specially relatives
This!!!;
Added to the utility belt, will credit DomD every time I use it
The worst source of jealousy especially active jealousy is when it comes from your own immediate family members like siblings.
Parents are worse.
Yep disgusting behaviour these people are bottom barrel
Couldn't agree more!
The scariest.
Yes.
Always listen to your intuition. Some people will come into your life to sabotage you.
It doesn’t matter why they’re jealous of you it’s your job to discern who they are, and keep them at arms length.
Co-sign 💯
It is not envy in a sense that they want "the same thing", it is more that, they think so low of you that they don't think you deserve it. They think you are a "peasant", and you don't deserve good things to happen to you. They just use you to pass their time and to stimulate themselves. It is a hard realization when it hits you.
I think Jealousy is the Gateway drug to Narcissism.
Wrath, Envy, Greed, etc.
They don't call them the "7 Deadly Sins" for nothing!
Yeeeeeeh😮
They can and will destroy your life if you’re not aware just how dangerous they can be. I turned the other cheek many times as I’m loyal to those close to me. I’m a total loner now. I would never have believed it possible that people are often more full,of hate than love
Same
Same
Exact story of my life.I just can't understand how you envy another.You can never have everything,why bother being jealous of another.
I can resonate! My big sister tried to kill me at least twice that I know off!! This thing is so dangerous 😢
Ditto. So over it.
If you are a sensitive person you are going to quickly realize that most people are fake and only get close to you because they want something out of you, the result is you become a loner coz you can't deal with fakeness.
Sad reality. I am beginning to believe there are more people who lack integrity than those who possess it. I know no one is perfect and we can all do things when we are en route to becoming adults that can hurt others even when we don’t realise it, or have not yet matured enough to understand the consequences. But, I am seeing most seems to never mature into adults with the real ability for empathy and never seemed to develop conscience. Selfishness at all costs seems to be most peoples blueprint for living their lives.
Damn that’s me now. Lol
Yes! We can see through their manipulation. The love bombing, the guilt tripping, etc.
When you experience a non genuine friend/friends in your life, you become a loner and very protective of your space. I like to think that everyone can grow and change but you have to put the work in to become a good person/better version of yourself.
Exactly
You’re absolutely right
Take notes to what he is saying BE MINDFUL WHO YOU SHARE YOUR BUSINESS WITH stay away from people who secretly judge and are dedicated to misunderstand you stop being vulnerable to FAKE FRIENDS STOP SHARING SO MUCH OF YOUR THOUGHTS AND PROBLEMS with people pretend to love and care NOT EVERYONE IS DESERVING OF YOUR Vulnerability
I can feel jealousy and envy coming from these type of people right away!. The negative energy of these individuals is so overwhelming!
Envy is evil
Jealousy is righteous
Judgement is evil
Discernment is righteous
Easy to put in words very complex to understand
Envy is an energy that destructs the one who's receiving it and the one who's sending it.
No envy is drinking your own vial of poison and expecting the other person to die. And Jesus Christ says “No Weapon formed against His Saints will prosper”…
robert is so right … beware of friends
You have to maintain a crisp baseline understanding that there are no "gods" out there. ANYBODY who seems too good to be true...is. The more overwhelmingly intoxicating somebody is at first blush, the quicker you should run for the hills. Find somebody boring who mounts no campaign to conquer you.
I learned that boring means, safe, consistent, predictable and reliable so all the good things!
The purpose of life is not to play it safe
@@JenYin.em having principles is not synonymous with “boring”. Chaos is not synonymous with excitement and time of your life.
You can be interesting too. If you know how to have conversations. Art of communication is a real deal.@@JenYin.
Beware of being love-bombed. It's intoxicating when it happens, and these people can come to us when we're very vulnerable, like when we're in a state of grief. As Robert says, that kind of rapid intensity isn't natural, but when we're stumbling, we can fall prey to it. You can watch out for it, but there's no real protection. It's just life. When it occurs, try to love yourself through it.
My mother inlaw had some pictures of myself with my little sister, and she showed me the face, in many pictures she had that face looking at me, I did some tests to see if my mother inlaw was correct, well my heart was hurt, my little sister did indeed secretly hate me, I later found out that she was secretly behind my back going to my mum and older sister gossiping about me, then coming to my face with a smile. She passively aggressively bullied me then gaslight me, I didn't notice because I love her still do, what hurts is I actually gave her my life, I gave her more then half my wages when she was a young teenager, made sure I went around other girls to let them know don't mess with my sister. And deep down, she actually hated me FOR NOTHING, not just that, but gossiped to family about me. She was sending provocative pictures to a guy I was chatting with, then when I confronted her, she point blank Said "why r u jealous" so nasty, by the way she had a boy friend with a child to him, which i have never revealed what she was doing. I didn't understand because I would of took her side no matter what. I finally now say no to he. Myy boundaries r fully up with love and compassion. I literally gave her my unconditional love my life, and all the while she was playing me and lying about me, but coming to me as a victim of everyone. Now I am apparently evil because I finally found my worth and say NO. The funny thing is my mother inlaw spotted it.
You r a good person. Don’t have regrets. God will give you more
You’re not alone . I’ve had family , those I unconditionally gave to and expected nothing who turned on me once I didn’t do exactly as they expected . It was clear that their relationship with me was conditional .
I have that sister - no contact for 6 years, still very painful.
God blessed you with a loving, caring, and discerning MIL, treasure her ❤
"you can murdered for it (envy)". In present day, they turn people against you, exclude you, subtle slights about you in your pack. So, do we tone our natural selves down or find people more like us? Outshining my Master seems to be my invisible superpower...so invisible I don't see it. Some people love me, some HATE me (but want to be me).
Exactly
Science would NEVER move FORWARD if scientists embraced this crappy mantra “Never outshine the master” A TRUE master wants you to outshine them. The FAKES want you small and NOT outshining them !
A guy I knew over 20 years sabotaged personal and business relationships i was trying to make. It was envy of what might happen. It hurt to part ways until i realized what he'd done for so long.
I had a similar experience. He was my best friend's adult son. I could write a book about the crap I discovered after many years..
Succeed on your own terms regardless if people are envious of you or not. The problem is when you take that shit personally which you never should. What you should do is to just stay focused on your career and purpose, period and nothing and no one else.
This is actually a must, as Robert has nicely put it; "You're not going to get rid of envy". Thus, it's just better to embrace it all the time and never take it personally. Let envious people be the pathetic losers that they are instead. They will die on the inside while you shine bright in your own light.
Agreed! Jealousy and envy are normal human emotions that we all have, hence the notion of never taking it personal! Two issues I see, individuals who claim that they have people around them that are jealous of them can also be suffering from a little bit of narcissism, jealousy and envy at times can be not so easy to detect at first so people need to have enough self awareness to be accurate in their assessment! Secondly, I’m a little more understanding of someone’s perceived jealousy or envy towards me or other people! Who knows someone’s genetics, upbringing and environment?!?!? Where I don’t believe in a world of freewill then I’ve become a bit more empathetic towards someone’s hate even towards me! But as I sense it, I deal with that person accordingly, because as discussed, these people will literally ruin your life!
It’s up to us as individuals to use our jealousy and envy appropriately and to not let it destroy us!
There's a difference between envy and appreciation. You can appreciate where other people are in life and what they have without being envious.
Yeah I definitely was more this kind of person than a crabs in the bucket kind of person. 💯
I agree 💯 with that.
I have had so many issues with this. One girl even tried to poke holes in my relationship because she was jealous of my relationship, the whole friendship was a disaster downward spiral. Im extremely cautious now, a friend recently said “your so lucky you don’t have to deal with work” and I immediately withdrew form the conversation. I know if i feel envious it means I probably want something they have, but i have enough faith to know if it was meant for me I’ll have it or that i can work towards and have what they have anyway, so it doesn’t last long at all. My paranoia is that 90% of people seem to not be able to do the same..
When others are happy, and you are happy for them. You actually gain without any cost.
Exactly.
I felt with jealousy constantly growing up. I allowed them to make me average like them when clearly I was meant to surpass them. Sorry not sorry. I now don’t tolerate any negatively and any person that’s envious . I get rid of them immediately. I’ve worked too hard to be who I am and I had to kick many people out of my life to do it. I don’t think I’m better than them in a human level but they just couldn’t go where I was going, where I am now.
This just explained so much for me. Some of my friends hating on me as I work toward my goal is human nature. They can’t help themselves.
I have heard more times than I’d like “they are jealous of you” 😮💨
Noooo! I don’t want that 😔
That last part. That’s because you’re precious. 💎
ALL the time ...my whole life I have heard that. I never subscribed to that. I tried to deny that it was jealousy. I would think that perhaps I had inadvertently offended them? I don't like to intentionally draw attention to myself. When I hear "oh their jelous of you," I cry inside because I know it's just a matter of time before the spiritual attacks from that person begins. Then the sabotage, backstabbing...😢
IDC.... I myself have always been a secure individual; it was always outside forces trying to make me feel insecure due to however they deep down felt about THEMSELVES‼I can say 100% I haven't ever been envious of anyone. I just always believed if someone had something I didn't, that I wanted is to ACTUALLY WORK FOR THE LIKING OF THAT THING. Never take from others or hate on others because it blocks your own blessings 💯 It's funny how frenemies aren't only friends/associates but "family" too‼
A wise senior woman once said, ask yourself, "Do I like myself when I'm with this person?" If the answer is no, withdraw, distance yourself
I stay away from those who wallow in self-pity.
There is always a Judas. A snake 🐍 in the grass who wants to lead you down the garden path. It’s always a friend who hates you the most. A wolf 🐺 in sheep’s clothes. A wise man can get more from his enemies that a fool can from his friends. Your enemies enemies are your friends. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
Judas was not envy. Read the real story!
No the enemies of your enemies are your ENEMIES!. Wake up people!
Do not keep your enemies closer. Get away from them as fast as you can. I speak from experience.
@@alwaysblessed2794 if you have no friends then you have no enemies.
@@sophiawilson8696 you wake up sheepeople 🐑
Schadenfreude and Mitfreude are German expressions. Honestly, as a German woman, I believe my people invented the concept of being envious. It‘s part of the culture and it‘s repulsive to me. I dislike so many envious people right now. They lurk everywhere in my surrounding.
Have had to learn very hard lessons about these people, they say and do the most horrific of things to you, manipulate you, always in competition, always gossiping behind your back. .. . .fake apologies. You try and cut them off and they feel as though they have been wronged. You can help and support these people but their behaviour reverts back to toxicity. They feel entitled to your help. The behaviours caused a lot of distress. Never again! As soon as I detect any toxicity, I distance myself quick sharp! Includes family members
With God there is no place for envy,jealousy or insecurities!Just believe and you will experience it!❤
Once you start surrounding yourself with winners & visionaries, your mindset will change and you'll start to have faith in the dreams God/Yeshua/Buddha/Allah/Krishna/The Great Spirit gave you, and they will actually come to pass.
The more your circle decreases, the more your peace increases. You're always "acting funny", when you don’t do what they want you to do. You can't take everyone on YOUR journey: it's not your responsibility.
Friends and family are the people who resist your personal development the most. Misery loves company. Be modest on broadcasting your victories successes, because it fosters animosity and jealousy among some family and friends.
Eat well, dress impeccably at all times, exercise, and always greet people with a warm smile. Nothing beats the power of a positive attitude.
Someone said to me recently that an envious person will triangulate you, villainize you, then rescue the third person and become the hero. I steered clear of this person for a long time- they finally apologized after saying some nasty things and I let them in a tiny bit only to be met with still clear envy via gossip and lies…and hurting others in the process. I stay silent with the exception of a few close friends that I vented to- now it’s time to move on. More will always be revealed
I started withdrawing from a migh-maintenance, demanding "friendship" after I realized how much I missed being alone. She began phasing me out of the social circle and did so successfully. I've gone back to our hairdresser to learn that she has spread derogatory rumors around town. Thank god I moved out of that shithole of a place. I'm so much happier today..
Its dangerous... especially the lengths ppl would go through ....the amount of lies told on me...is astounding.
Great video.
Envy is a message that we want something like that for ourselves & what we should perhaps work towards.
Unfortunately most people utilize envy as a form of comparison & measure their own worth by what OTHER people have. That’s when it’s dangerous.
I think I’m lucky in that I naturally want everyone to be happy & succeed because I see it as contributing to overall world happiness & possibly peace.
In the few times I feel envy I’m thinking to myself “I’m happy for them for having XYZ, and I don’t want to take it from them, nor do I assume they came about it by nefarious means, but I’d like to have it also. And perhaps, if possible, I will ask how they achieved it.
Misery loves company & I feel so sorry for people who believe that others succeeding means that they are failing.
Comparison is the thief of joy.
That last bit really hit home. I stopped sharing my achievements with old friends. I talk shop with a stranger half a world away since 99% of the people who supposedly love me never even ask to see my work.
It's great that this clip has made so many people in the comments turn their awareness toward people who are or have been envious of them and that they are committed to not allowing envious people in their lives, but have they been willing to acknowledge and consider their own enviousness?
I'd like to add that there are people who exhibit this drama or negative complaint not because they are the problem but because they depend on those who also infected them with this mentality and they are under a lot of stress. I think everyone vents when undergoing stress. And when you are surrounded by people who is like this in the first place you develop a beehive mentality. And then you realize oh god, what happened to me? There is a saying "don't bite the hand that feeds you". And it's not always as easy as cut them off. Whether they be family members or boss or co workers. People do have circumstances that forces them to interact with toxic people. And honestly it's really hard to just ignore them
Very well said.
@@erykahhoney588 much appreciated! 🙏
This is so true, thank you
envy for the good and positive things that a person has achieved so that you can be motivated to do better, not to hurt that person but use Envy as encouragement.
There's an important difference between emulation and envy.
So basically to turn envy into inspiration❤😊
I don’t think there’s a positive connotation to the term envy. If you want to be motivated by someone or their achievements, then they are your inspiration which seems more seems the positive form of envy. Envy to me, sits right along with jealousy which can both turn a person dangerous if not controlled.
I went out with a friend for her birthday for the first time and man did she have some longtime friends with her that were haters. 😬
Did you tell her?
I have an aunt who is extremely envious of me to the point it’s sickening and obsessive
May god heal her soul
She has a vary nasty spirit
Bad friends teach you bad habits wit mostly negative thoughts & emotions. Good friends teach you good habits with mostly positive thoughts & emotions. Slowly keep busy and lessen your interactions with them. Always have an excuse to not meet them. Hopefully eventually they will get the hint.
This man has hit on so many key points, I’ve experienced in my life his so clear in his explaining it’s fascinating ❤
Purrrrrrrrre WISDOM from this man ☝🏾
@EYRM9 amen
You’re preaching to the choir and I’d like to add
The world is not my home and my life is not my own. ☦️
God said 👇🏾
The Great I Am is in your core.
The Great I AM is the Light.
Even when I’m hidden still I AM.
I AM the flower, wind, rain, sinju, marrow, rock, author, maker, the touch that set in motion all that you see, all that you know, all that you don’t see or know.
I knit you, I put breath in you, I’m coded in every cell, every nano second of time falls in step as I will it so, I AM in you, I AM all, even when you perceive nothing still I AM there.
⚔️🛡️☦️🤍☝🏾
I’m 71 years old and have experienced having frenemies in my life from time to time.
Some friends have started out as true friends but at some point became a frenemy.
Long story short, the parents of a good friend of mine went through a very acrimonious divorce when he and I were 14. The divorce made him very bitter and cynical and he was envious of kids like me who lived in a stable and loving home. This boy did all sorts of mean things to me and it got to the point where I transferred to a different high school to get away from him.
As a senior and having gone through many relationships in my life I am more leery of people and their intentions and am careful who I let into my life. Actually the only two people I know now who I completely trust are my wife and my best friend. I’ve been let down by too many people in my 71 years and it has jaded me somewhat.
Proverb 26:24-26
Enemies disguise themselves with their lips,
but in their hearts they harbor deceit.
25 Though their speech is charming, do not believe them,
for seven abominations fill their hearts.
26 Their malice may be concealed by deception,
but their wickedness will be exposed in the assembly.
Some people were subject to serious/severe abuse in the past though, so openly talking about that does not make them a "drama queen/king"... which is precisely what the abuser/malignant NPD case (or whoever) would love for all to perceive them as.
So, let's not get that twisted.
But the obsession is real strange tho.. like why you want to be that close to me then 😂😂😂
This just happened to me,, all the signs were there, i came to the maximum limit and ended tat friendship today. How the hell youtube recommended this just after that
I know it's not the main point, but it was nice how Robert made it clear that some people just have bad luck.
If you genuinely think someone's a good egg don't let people tell you otherwise. Those will be your best relationships if you're willing to be understanding and useful.
*Maturing is keeping enemies and get rid of friends!* 😊
This video is perfect timing. I am going through this now! Omg! Ugh!!! Lol 🤪😥🤣😂
GREENE feeling envy from another author when his number one in his teachings
The people who are there for you when you are in a difficult place, maybe health wise for example. They get a kick out of your pain and feel superior because they feel inferior. When that person has something good happen to them, they feel better and the toxic friend feels annoyed and frustrated and ultimately envy. Their fragile persona can’t cope with the power shift.
Whenever I see Robert, I always think, he looks like a healthy well adjusted man.
Really?
Well envy and narc go hand in hand for a narc you are forever enemy i tried now am off .....
I have a crush on him. He’s soothing to me. I could listen to him talk all day!
wtf does that even mean, hes struggling to breathe
Actually he "looks" like a man who's been through life's mill, paid his dues, shows the scars and has rich experience to share, and the talent to express it in a highly articulate way. Also, he "looks" like a person who doesn't glibly come up with shallow, vacuous observations from any armchair of self-gratifying, dues-free sarcasm. That's just my own impression, of course.
Be very careful whom you let in. Your energy is precious. Do not just drop your boundaries when lower vibrational people suddenly want to become your bestie. Be selective and picky. Real friends are few and far between. Remember that. Not everyone you meet is meant to stay.
I’ve been told out loud that I’ve been envied before which was really weird.
I’m confused about the concept of hanging out with insecure people will make more insecure and hanging out with confident people makes you more confident. It makes sense on the surface, but when I actually think about it, it seems that most people are insecure about one thing or another. So it seems to me that if you’re hanging out with more confident people it’s good for you but bad for them because their confidence might be effected by your insecurities. And he talks as hanging out with people who are better than you is something you should do as something that is good for you. But aren’t you harming those same people? Can anyone help me understand this
You're correct. This is not the best advice.
This is very good advice, actually. The two difficulties you're having are, 1) interpreting the word "better" in a somewhat superficial way, and, 2) a failure to adequately consider the alternative. About the first, "better" doesn't mean "self-flauntingly, boastingly better." That would NOT be "better" people. Rather, people who are "better" are those with a solid, mature, healthily integrated self-understanding, a healthy altruism (which means, they're also not anybody's doormats), a healthy ambition in life to keep pushing themselves for more learning, discovery and rich exploitation of their own gifts in ways that contribute to the lives of many others. THAT is "better" and there is NO downside to trying to associate with, learn from, emulate such people. Don't confuse "confidence" of the best kind with narcissism. He's not saying, of course, 'Go out and find a bunch of narcissists to associate with." So, no, it's definitely NOT bad advice to spend time with the most healthily confident people you can. About the second, your failure to adequately consider the alternative. Usually when a concept presents some difficulties to comprehension, a very helpful trick is to imagine its extremes, so that the concept becomes stark and easily identifiable. So consider the alternative in the extreme: you can't really believe that there would be any upside to surrounding yourself and immersing yourself, your whole life, in a circle of people who are all plagued and riddled with crippling insecurities, jealousies, envy, mutual suspicion, petty rivalries, laziness and a refusal to get up and TRY, all of them scrambling after their perception of the biggest piece of a pathetically miserable small pie, ready to stab each other in the back to be the Big Fish in their fetidly ingrown small pond. You think you'd do yourself, or them, any good by wasting your life among them, ESPECIALLY by the way, if you did it with the notion "Okay, at least I'm 'better' than this crowd, so by being with them I'll improve them"? (As if they wouldn't read that right away, and you can imagine how they'd just lo-o-ove that.) I think that pretty much settles that. As for your last question. Again, what do you mean "people who are better than you"? If you mean they're TELLING you they're better than you, then guess what: they're not better than you. If you mean, more experienced, more wise, well-balanced, genuinely helpful and adept at maintaining boundaries, then, don't worry, Rocky, you won't be able to harm them by associating with them even if you wanted to (and we'll assume it's not your purpose to want to, right?).
@@kensears5099you’re missing Rocky’s point, if person A decides to drop his group of misfits let’s call them group B, to hang out with group C that he believes are of a better quality by the standards set in the video… won’t group C look at him as being from Group B and not on their level. So basically they would either welcome him or reject him. Essentially becoming what he did to those in group B, judge and jury. The irony.
Robert has this wrong, and it’s vile when ppl dump friends for being misfits, that’s not friendship it’s just a transaction.. what can u do to better me. Or I’m out. This is why soo many ppl abandon friends when they fall, or when they become rich. Then sell the idea to others like it’s a net positive, when in reality they traded it in for more shallow relationships
Some people have actually gone through things. The world already tells you to pack it all away. Maybe why suicide rate is somhigh. People only want the happy, light bouncy energy talking how amazing life is constantly. I like hearing from authentic people. Not just those with lives of ease.
But if you learn to love and feel brain heart coherence, your life becomes so much easier or even say compliment to people who are happy,
because if they manage to be happy or happily married they actually inspire many other people to do the same.
Some explain that love and compassion can be also very infesious, in positive way, because its human nature.
It’s a bit odd how the speaker keeps saying that envy and lack of happiness for other people is so normal compared with being happy for people. It is natural to be happy for others. Moreover - we all have control over our emotions, and can choose to be happy for others and not go down the path of envy. Sure, chimps feel envy. But we’re not chimps. We have the power to choose good, and we should. Even when it’s hard.
OH MY WORD🤯 In the first 2 minutes Robert describes my ex to a "T" 🎯 Wishing I had taken this advice at the time
Being around insecure people will make you insecure.
I absolutely love Robert Greene and have several of his books. I agree with much of what he says, but respectfully disagree with some of his points here. Yes, envy/jealousy are unfortunately human traits, albeit lower energy level. But this is NOT natural or a default state to be in. Those who choose to play victim, are insecure, blame everyone/everything for their lives, or refuse to do work on themselves to heal their past traumas will of course display these lower human qualities. But the default state of human beings is love, kindness, compassion, community, honesty, etc. - characteristics that are very vivid in innocent children who still have that purity in them. Unfortunately we lose sight of these traits as we grow up, when falling victim to toxic environments (family, friends, school, career, etc). True that many have suffered horrific situations in their lives, and the pain and trauma they've gone through is very very real. We've all experienced this. But ultimately it is each and every one of our responsibilities to work on ourselves to heal from those traumas so that our inner love and kindness may resurface - that includes forgiving our little selves and what we've been through, forgiving (i.e. letting go, detaching from) those who've hurt us, whether family, friends, coworkers, partners etc. Basically cutting cords with all who no longer serve a purpose in our lives; wiping the slate clean to allow more aligned, kind, compassionate individuals and circumstances to enter our lives; and working on changing our lives for the better. Hurt people hurt people, but healed people also heal people ... remember that :)
Sending love to everyone - wherever you are. May we all stay safe, away from evil people and environments, and work to be the best version of ourselves each and every day ♥
Some people really do deserve their success especially when they didn’t go to the tutor center to get boys to do their work for them 🤗
It is not true that everybody feels envy. There are people that do not feel envy and that is hard for them to even understand how it feels to be envious. I see more people celebrating people’s victories than failures
Unfortunately for myself, I’m simply a person, who bad things happen to. I seem to have a lot of problems with people, by probably a few major factors, like merely being civil, being alone (predatory people love this), and racial and gender factors play their part.
I do work to save myself and mitigate people, however. I don’t like talking about it, for the purpose of just talking about it. I also don’t see it as my problem, that I don’t comply, with what people want from me. What they typically have wanted are things like free caregiving or, perhaps, a free place to live. Since that’s a no, yes, I’m the problem.
I hat I’ve learned, however, is the key to it is to not simply mitigate people with strong boundaries, but to just not say anything. You must suffer in silence, until you’ve rid yourself of them, because no one has any empathy for you anyway. Often, they will side, with the person who’s trying to use you actually. They may often feel you should give up your life, to become a vessel for use. You may also be conveying the problem - to someone else, who also intends to be a problem.
Where frenemies are concerned, even though I’ve had some successes and done some things, I don’t think I’ve done a great deal. But then, comes the people who have done absolutely nothing. They are also the types that don’t want to do what you’re doing, but they either still want what you have or they want to destroy what you have. Even the types that don’t want what you want, but simply don’t want you to have it either. And I’ve definitely met the type and been the target of, “I know you have your nice career going and your life seems to be comfortable. But, I’d feel more comfortable with you, if you played nursemaid to me, since I didn’t make any plans for my own care. By the way, you are GOING to be doing that.” Yeah, keep the fantasy going.
So, what is the key? Be scarce. Learn how to be comfortable, celebrating your successes alone. Because quite often, even your own mother is not happy with those successes. Mine tried to destroy mine.
The backhanded compliments is the indicator for me to walk away with no explanation n don’t make a sound or explain n when they hit you up just tell I don’t want to talk to you ..I was relieved when I did that n I’m way better n I promised myself that my gut is valid n to listen to myself n I’m important enough to be honest with myself and what I want ..I am an asset now rather than a liability.
They don't call them the "7 Deadly Sins" for nothing!
The photo of Sophia Loren does not show envy. It shows indignation and disapproval at the inappropriate dress.
yes, and her fear of Jane Mansfield‘s breasts about to pop out of her dress. Sophia has explained that so many times.
Boy have a lived this! Imagine finding out a friend you treated like family after moving to a new town . Nuts is an understatement!
Profound video!
Yes, always the victim! Energy drain!
Watch out for the coverts!
Believe it or not but I learned this by myself when I was a little kid. When I turned thirty I became enlightened spiritually and the weird thing is I never ever practice any spirituality hmmm after that awakening ten years ago concepts like this are so clear to me and then I realized that maybe Mr green is enlightened too and then I started seeing noticing the only difference between people awaken or sleep. Cheers
This was so deep
People judge too much. I hate drama.
Envy can become dangerous.The nutty ones confuse their wishes with reality.
I remember reading a piece in Time magazine back in the late 1980s or 1990s about a conference on the subject of Envy Sickness that was going be held in Portugal.
I gotta say some people, who open up their problem, aren't necessarily insecure. Often, insecure people are loud and bias. Those perceived to be negative are usually too honest to a fault that can be draining at times. All they need is to be heard and probably some suggestions would help that person a lot.
Charming people are happy to be with but may not be there when you are vulnerable or at lows; AND don't easily brush off people that have opinions and being vulnerable with you, relationships aren't black & white.
So yes, we need to read people but that takes a loooong time to finally say, yes this person resonates with me or toxic 😛
When i am lonely for a long time, i rush into being one’s friend but that does not mean i am a frenemy.
I can’t remember which one envy or jealousy but one is I want what you have but the other is I want what you have and I don’t want you to have it either
This dude is a narc. I have never felt this kind of envy for others having good things happen to them that i love. His entire book is a projection.
Yes it does😊
I have a friend, a really close friend that like criticizing everything about me. From my decisions, my vocabulary, my behavior and my work ethic. It’s like she loves making me feel bad about who I am when I’m already not feeling good about myself. Multiple times I told her I want to stop being friends with her but she always make me feel like I’ve done something wrong and the I’ve done her wrong and she cries victim to my mom everytime trying to remain friends with me. I’ve grown to have resentment towards her and I wish she would get the f**** out my life.
I’m by myself . I wasn’t given any “friend” to hang out with. I do visit with people who are my neighbors.
I know it’s not the point but the thumbnail with Sophia Loren looking at Jayne Mansfield is often very misconstrued, at least according to Sophia Loren.
Yes because those boobs were dangling
So men go through this as well. With women is 1000x worse.
I saw it first hand recently. I met this person on a holiday. She was married but never hardly got any attention. Sadly I got some and she was so envious and tried to tell this guy that was interested in speaking me, that I had “ stomach issues” right in front of me. Still didn’t work, still continued to pursue me and every man that would smile my way, you could see the jealousy in her eyes. 😂 Your girl is a plain Jane so I’m not saying I’m gorgeous… but I can’t man. The people you meet.
that photo of Sophia Loren has absolutely nothing to do with envy. it has to do with the fact that Sophia was afraid that Jane Mansfield’s breasts were about to pop out of her dress.
💯💯💯💯
Not everyones first reaction is to have envy 😅 and its not natural to have that as a first reaction. People differ.
Can we have Part 2, where’s the rest of the interview 🥹🫶
Link for the full interview in the description. Thank you for watching.
Anyone else bugged out that this envy stuff is the rule and not the acception?!
hum.... when somebody tells me something good happened to her/him I feel happy. I really don't go through the envious stage before. the few times I thought it wasn't fair was because I knew first hand the person didn't deserve it, cheated, or something. for example when one of my friends in college succeeded and I knew she stole an other friend's course note, and this other friend couldn't study properly and failed. yeah, I was like "I am happy for you"
I think I am very naive.
what if that person is just a victim of narc people?
❤act together ❤
I dont believe anyone is all good or all bad. Sometimes it’s something beyond what we can see or have knowledge of at the time. It’s like not knowing your dad was as abusive or a sister/cousin whoever. But once you know then you can speak up. Or people being immoral. No we’re not god to judge but you can speak up and say something