After being a yes man my whole life I finally said a firm NO to an invitation I had no desire to go to, the pressure was immense, there were several people around me, it was uncomfortable, I didn’t make up an excuse, I just said I don’t want to NO. but after it was done I felt so good. Tired of saying yes all the time, gotta set boundaries.
@Sagnik Mallick If you’re constantly saying yes to things you don’t want to do and it’s stressing you out it isn’t good for mental health. Also you put out an image of a yes man that people can take advantage of. A firm ‘’ No ‘’ shows confidence and while it may make for a slightly awkward moment, ultimately people will be ok with that answer and respect your boundaries. Try it !
But people always try to make me guilty and i eventually cave in after a few minutes of them making me feel guilty of putting myself first ... putting what i have to do first.
I also had a very similar situation many moons ago with a guy hounding the hell outta me to go to his gigs he was putting on. In his mind, if he hounded long enough, he'd basically hound me into submission like they do on the streets of North Africa, and he'd got round me a hell of a lot of times, and it was seriously making me ill, it really was, because it was a hell of a long way from my home to attend these nights out, and he was even just assuming that when he snapped his fingers, that i'd instantly stand to attention, and tbh, that bothered me BIIIIIIIIIIG TIME, because it is completely disregarding the fact that i have health issues and my mother is disabled, plus i have my own routine to adhere to, and the end came when he attempted to get me to come out on a night when the winds were practically a hurricane, and he started being funny with me, and i told him a firm "NO CHANCE AM I COMING OUT IN THAT WEATHER", but he was still persistent, but off with me, but point is, i didn't go on that occasion, and i knew i'd won a battle that day, but like an idiot, i let him get around me, i went to another show he put on, and then the hounding started once again, so i sat down with myself, and actually said "you had success last time saying NO, deliver it to him again, because if you keep letting him win, he's getting even more comfortable with this", so i just in the end, despite him attempting to get around me again, i just simply stated "I WON'T BE ATTENDING ANY MORE SHOWS FROM HERE ON PAL", and he didn't ask since ! Like this bloke says, "NO IS A WALL, YES IS A DOORWAY", never truer words spoken 👏👏🙌🙌🙏🙏❤️
One last thing too about this guy, he once hounded me to come to a show, i agreed, i was texting him in the morning, i even text him 2 hours before i left telling him i was on my way, i got there, approached him, said Hiya ect, and his reply was "oh, i didn't even know you was coming tonight (he's a heavy weed smoker), and that's when i decided to just be firm and use the magic word NO from here on if i was uncomfortable with a situation
"Living in the fear of exploitation is more damaging than the exploitation itself" - Sadguru 🙏. Always so thoughtful and full of wisdom. I really needed to hear this.
For anybody who does not understand: you gotta create an environment which you are all about yes and happiness instead of creating an environment of no's. When you are force to say yes vut your answer is no. It is not the environment you wanna be your whole life
Me reading the comments, realising you're the only one who understood his awnser. With his awnser he tries to get you into action by changing your environment. Starting with a tiny little world; choosing people who to say yes to. And step by step expanding this little world. Eventually you have created your environment in which you can say yes all the time without being exploited.
Creating your own small world of yes actually helps in saying no to circumstances your r supposed to say no without feeling guilty. Wonderful !!!!!!!!!!!!! Thankyou sadhguru ..u r a blessing 🙏🙏🙏
realize that many people say yes all the time when they mean NO, when u say NO , people will secretly respect you and understand your boundaries, then it will be easier the next times cause you’ve done it once already. The goal is to simply not say YES to anything you really don’t wanna do. You might feel guilty but it’s worth setting boundaries to what people can expect from you. Hope this helps!
We need to give an excuse “Oh I have to help my mother with the grocery shopping” or “I’m going out of town” no reception (Sequioa Woods) Look up excuses to give when you don’t want to see someone. That’s what everyone does to me. Or just tell the truth. “I would love to go! But I went out yesterday and need some rest today.” The truth is better. People understand. (Just don’t insult them, and if you say no enough a side effect is they might not invite you out again. So YOU have to let them know when you want to go out again!)
Iam watching this video after not finding answer to "how to say no" from Sandeep Maheshwari video.... Sadhguru has a lot of stuff to speak for all doubts and questions
What to do when the small trusted group of people around with whom I was happy with saying yes, Does not like it or take well(they think I am changing my behaviour) when I say no sometimes.
I disagree.not sure he understood her point. If others keep expecting u to keep doing wat they ask with no respect for yr space or time, then u r heading for a breakdown or gonna resent d lack of time to do things for yrself
It seems a lot does not understand what guru means. He answered the question in a higher sense, I guess only the one with higher intellect will understand what he means.
@@redheesh I use to be a people pleaser when I was younger and always looking for validation, I got walked over and used like a door mat, I cringe just thinking about it lol, but other than this video i usually agree with Sadguru
@@bigvee401 Same here. Me too agrees with him generally on most topics. May be what he meant here is that the eventual goal is a society that anyone can always say yes and not be afraid of getting exploited. But until that utopia comes, saying always yes will make our life very miserable.
Sadhguru ur answers to my questions is always very profound which stops me for the while to ponder over it. But anyways you are the answer to my every question to handle this mad world and fits into it. Thank you Sadhguru 🙏
well that wasnt confusing was it 😂.. I think if you know the negatives outweigh the positives then no is the right awnser.. but if everything in your life is a no.. then maybe it's time to seek out what makes you say hell yeh 🙏💫
So irrelevant answer to a simple question. She was asking how to say NO politely and he explained saying no is negative - open a area in life to say yes? He didnt understand the question
I do disagree with you No is the way of opening a door that you did not experience. We say yes when we can commit what we said yes for. And No when we can not bear or not have the capacity to do so. No is an answer which identify your character of being. With all respect to your many good philosophy speeches . I do disagree with you this time.
1) south Indian people 2) this content is broadcasted world wide so English... 3)is it compulsory to use Hindi everywhere? They can speak any language they want
Power distance & reciprocity driven cultures find it hard to say no. Cultures that find hard to say no, say yes to things without meaning it resulting in empty promises delivered only via incessant follow-ups. Empty yes and follow-up culture leads to inefficient economy.
After being a yes man my whole life I finally said a firm NO to an invitation I had no desire to go to, the pressure was immense, there were several people around me, it was uncomfortable, I didn’t make up an excuse, I just said I don’t want to NO. but after it was done I felt so good. Tired of saying yes all the time, gotta set boundaries.
@Sagnik Mallick If you’re constantly saying yes to things you don’t want to do and it’s stressing you out it isn’t good for mental health. Also you put out an image of a yes man that people can take advantage of. A firm ‘’ No ‘’ shows confidence and while it may make for a slightly awkward moment, ultimately people will be ok with that answer and respect your boundaries. Try it !
But people always try to make me guilty and i eventually cave in after a few minutes of them making me feel guilty of putting myself first ... putting what i have to do first.
Relatable.
I also had a very similar situation many moons ago with a guy hounding the hell outta me to go to his gigs he was putting on. In his mind, if he hounded long enough, he'd basically hound me into submission like they do on the streets of North Africa, and he'd got round me a hell of a lot of times, and it was seriously making me ill, it really was, because it was a hell of a long way from my home to attend these nights out, and he was even just assuming that when he snapped his fingers, that i'd instantly stand to attention, and tbh, that bothered me BIIIIIIIIIIG TIME, because it is completely disregarding the fact that i have health issues and my mother is disabled, plus i have my own routine to adhere to, and the end came when he attempted to get me to come out on a night when the winds were practically a hurricane, and he started being funny with me, and i told him a firm "NO CHANCE AM I COMING OUT IN THAT WEATHER", but he was still persistent, but off with me, but point is, i didn't go on that occasion, and i knew i'd won a battle that day, but like an idiot, i let him get around me, i went to another show he put on, and then the hounding started once again, so i sat down with myself, and actually said "you had success last time saying NO, deliver it to him again, because if you keep letting him win, he's getting even more comfortable with this", so i just in the end, despite him attempting to get around me again, i just simply stated "I WON'T BE ATTENDING ANY MORE SHOWS FROM HERE ON PAL", and he didn't ask since ! Like this bloke says, "NO IS A WALL, YES IS A DOORWAY", never truer words spoken 👏👏🙌🙌🙏🙏❤️
One last thing too about this guy, he once hounded me to come to a show, i agreed, i was texting him in the morning, i even text him 2 hours before i left telling him i was on my way, i got there, approached him, said Hiya ect, and his reply was "oh, i didn't even know you was coming tonight (he's a heavy weed smoker), and that's when i decided to just be firm and use the magic word NO from here on if i was uncomfortable with a situation
Absolute YES will kill our personal life. Saying bold NO required in many situations.
Yes
actually I m also suffering from the condition where I want to say no but I couldn't
It's impossible when you're kind
When we finally say no or I can't! We free ourself and make room to say a true yes... And be happy to say it
Agree
Fr the frst time i felt sadguru dnt address the question fully... saying no is hard as well n saying yes to all is harmfull too
When you hate your self you say yes
When you love yourself you say no
"Living in the fear of exploitation is more damaging than the exploitation itself" - Sadguru 🙏.
Always so thoughtful and full of wisdom.
I really needed to hear this.
For anybody who does not understand: you gotta create an environment which you are all about yes and happiness instead of creating an environment of no's. When you are force to say yes vut your answer is no. It is not the environment you wanna be your whole life
Me reading the comments, realising you're the only one who understood his awnser. With his awnser he tries to get you into action by changing your environment. Starting with a tiny little world; choosing people who to say yes to. And step by step expanding this little world. Eventually you have created your environment in which you can say yes all the time without being exploited.
Saying yes to people makes me loss focus on my life and influence me on other things that don’t interest me. I want to say no to say on my journey
He actually is great in saying, that yes is better than no, but it is not always possible!
Ok his answer was going everywhere else, but to the point.
No
Creating your own small world of yes actually helps in saying no to circumstances your r supposed to say no without feeling guilty.
Wonderful !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thankyou sadhguru ..u r a blessing 🙏🙏🙏
Whenever someone asks about how much money I earn I get embarrassed...
This video helped me a lot
I still don't know how to say No, out of my little trusted circle.
realize that many people say yes all the time when they mean NO, when u say NO , people will secretly respect you and understand your boundaries, then it will be easier the next times cause you’ve done it once already. The goal is to simply not say YES to anything you really don’t wanna do. You might feel guilty but it’s worth setting boundaries to what people can expect from you. Hope this helps!
We need to give an excuse “Oh I have to help my mother with the grocery shopping” or “I’m going out of town” no reception (Sequioa Woods)
Look up excuses to give when you don’t want to see someone.
That’s what everyone does to me.
Or just tell the truth. “I would love to go! But I went out yesterday and need some rest today.”
The truth is better. People understand. (Just don’t insult them, and if you say no enough a side effect is they might not invite you out again. So YOU have to let them know when you want to go out again!)
Iam watching this video after not finding answer to "how to say no" from Sandeep Maheshwari video....
Sadhguru has a lot of stuff to speak for all doubts and questions
I didn't get the answer properly
I have a question that in the little word you have to say yes but there is situation you can not say yes at that time what We have to do?
What to do when the small trusted group of people around with whom I was happy with saying yes, Does not like it or take well(they think I am changing my behaviour) when I say no sometimes.
Invaluable lesson!
Women should learn to say NO more often. Especially when we are being forced to do something.
Put it simply it’s peer pressure. The people that use “come on.” Are the people to avoid.
I disagree.not sure he understood her point. If others keep expecting u to keep doing wat they ask with no respect for yr space or time, then u r heading for a breakdown or gonna resent d lack of time to do things for yrself
I agree with you, sadghuru as always got away with very generics answer.
It seems a lot does not understand what guru means. He answered the question in a higher sense, I guess only the one with higher intellect will understand what he means.
where is the answer to - how to say NO ?
Very important subject
Always saying yes can open you to exploitation, sadguru I have to disagree with you,
Yes, always saying yes can lead to exploitation for sure!! 100%%
I second that 100%
@@redheesh I use to be a people pleaser when I was younger and always looking for validation, I got walked over and used like a door mat, I cringe just thinking about it lol, but other than this video i usually agree with Sadguru
@@bigvee401 Same here. Me too agrees with him generally on most topics. May be what he meant here is that the eventual goal is a society that anyone can always say yes and not be afraid of getting exploited. But until that utopia comes, saying always yes will make our life very miserable.
Instead of saying no to negativity (from your point),
Say yes to positivity (from your point)
Sadhguru ur answers to my questions is always very profound which stops me for the while to ponder over it. But anyways you are the answer to my every question to handle this mad world and fits into it. Thank you Sadhguru 🙏
well that wasnt confusing was it 😂.. I think if you know the negatives outweigh the positives then no is the right awnser.. but if everything in your life is a no.. then maybe it's time to seek out what makes you say hell yeh 🙏💫
When you dont know the answer to something, say something that the people wont understand and pray that they wont follow up on that question
If we are unable to create a small circle of such people, how should we deal with it
Sir we can create such for others but what about us ?? How to react to others for there is a suspicion in environment they created for us..
So irrelevant answer to a simple question.
She was asking how to say NO politely and he explained saying no is negative - open a area in life to say yes? He didnt understand the question
How's the Josh,
High Sir
Say no let friend goes, if you say yes he will go after abusing you!
What he is saying ? If somebody ask for something we have to tell yes ah ?? Wrong answer
i didn't get the appropriate answer to the questiion.
I do disagree with you No is the way of opening a door that you did not experience. We say yes when we can commit what we said yes for. And No when we can not bear or not have the capacity to do so. No is an answer which identify your character of being. With all respect to your many good philosophy speeches . I do disagree with you this time.
I am even more confused now....❓
3:15
No
no answer..... yes and no depends on the situation you have to have courage to say no
I didn't get my answer..
Sadhguru is so cute 😇
He hadn't understood her question
u r right!!
Why didn’t he answer the question!?
He answered it only in a higher sense, I guess only the one with higher intellect will understand what he means.
@@dante0817 then what he means?
When I say No to my friends after that they said nikal lu**re
I Would Like To Propose This Very Girl
Haha! I've learnt to say no by now 😂
He did not answer the question.
fuck....
thanks for posting this
India k nhi h kya ye? Jo ek shbd bhi hindi nhi use krte
1) south Indian people
2) this content is broadcasted world wide so English...
3)is it compulsory to use Hindi everywhere? They can speak any language they want
Can't he actually answer straight to the people's question😐 never he answers to the point. May be becoz he dont have answer.
Indian Karl Marx
🤣
Power distance & reciprocity driven cultures find it hard to say no.
Cultures that find hard to say no, say yes to things without meaning it resulting in empty promises delivered only via incessant follow-ups.
Empty yes and follow-up culture leads to inefficient economy.
Irrelevant answer guru g
Sorry to say
Кто-то что-то понял ?
~♥~
Disappointed by his answer.
Ok........... f#* k this answer
Absolutely wrongly addressed the question
Complete nonsense