Dinosaur Jr.'s J Mascis on Straight Edge and More - Soft Focus - Episode 6

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  • Опубликовано: 2 авг 2024
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    As a founding member of Dinosaur Jr., J Mascis has been one of our favorite Fender-wielding front-guys for the better part of a quarter century. Even during that band's intermittent sabbaticals of the late 90s and early aughts, he kept at it, pulling together durable outfits such as Witch and J Mascis and the Fog and also kicking around with Mike Watt and helping to get the Stooges back together. In this special interview conducted in the United Kingdom, J opens up to Ian about the secrets of songwriting, an east-coast punk upbringing, and his near total disregard for the bass guitar.
    **
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Комментарии • 797

  • @killerbunyip
    @killerbunyip 7 лет назад +645

    At least J is talking. I've seen him twice in the past couple of years. His solo show he said ``Thank you'' at the end. With Dinosaur, about 30 minutes into the set, he and Murph started on different songs. They stopped, looked at each other, J looks down at his pedals, looks back up at us and says: ``We seem to have a discrepancy in our setlist.''

  • @adamblister6005
    @adamblister6005 9 лет назад +909

    This is the only interview with J. Mascis where J. Mascis isn't the weird one.

    • @Ojoe2010
      @Ojoe2010 9 лет назад +2

      +Pete Agassi lol, good one :D

    • @sebadcabre
      @sebadcabre 8 лет назад +15

      +Pete Agassi I don't think I've ever seen an interviewer use a hidden piece of paper to ask questions.

    • @nuckels188
      @nuckels188 6 лет назад +14

      Does he think he's in the beatles or

    • @deadlightdrifter3462
      @deadlightdrifter3462 6 лет назад +1

      So true

    • @gloryxkid
      @gloryxkid 5 лет назад +5

      There’s another noisey video with him and he’s actually laughing and having a good time

  • @louiso.4325
    @louiso.4325 6 лет назад +488

    I can't imagine how frustrating it must be to have a disdain for drugs but to have people constantly think you're on them

    • @ericgenestvideoclips
      @ericgenestvideoclips 5 лет назад +35

      I ve had that since I'm 14... Sometimes it's pretty annoying, yes...

    • @cybertronian2005
      @cybertronian2005 5 лет назад +60

      see also, Frank Zappa

    • @senileanimal7772
      @senileanimal7772 4 года назад +3

      Barney Os. People tell me that all the time i hate it

    • @zibro6379
      @zibro6379 4 года назад +2

      I can relate...

    • @shippo36able
      @shippo36able 4 года назад +8

      I understand this thought. I am an epileptic adult, and people often assume I am a tweaker, a methhead, and I'm like,man I smoke enough pot to kill a horse. Assumptions are for assholes.

  • @chogokin666
    @chogokin666 8 лет назад +449

    Two extremely high energy individuals!

  • @tylerlovejoy992
    @tylerlovejoy992 3 года назад +81

    "I feel like J has seen the face of God and nothing impresses him anymore"

  • @digitaldeficiency4893
    @digitaldeficiency4893 3 года назад +21

    "911 whats your emergency?"
    "uhh, yeah, so, there's like a umm... a fire..."

  • @indianapwn3s
    @indianapwn3s 8 лет назад +127

    This is like straight out of Portlandia

  • @Univox68
    @Univox68 8 лет назад +387

    damn i wonder what he sounds like when he's actually tired.

    • @flowerdoodle2438
      @flowerdoodle2438 8 лет назад +4

      Hilarious!

    • @adamblister6005
      @adamblister6005 8 лет назад +4

      +Univox sixtyeight comatose

    • @oshikiri999
      @oshikiri999 5 лет назад +21

      Some say his voice begins to come exclusively from his nose.

    • @SnaFOo75
      @SnaFOo75 4 года назад

      @@oshikiri999 lool

    • @oshikiri999
      @oshikiri999 4 года назад +1

      @@SnaFOo75 haha at least someone gets it 😂

  • @bauzel5890
    @bauzel5890 3 года назад +46

    J is so fucking relaxed, listen to him is somekind of anti-stress therapy.

  • @barefootiguana2760
    @barefootiguana2760 8 лет назад +138

    Camera man on the left picks his nose and plays with it at 5:03

  • @MrFluffypunk
    @MrFluffypunk 6 лет назад +21

    I cannot actually watch this... His voice... it's bringing up similar feelings to being stuck behind a really slow, shuffling old man on a narrow sidewalk when you're late to catch a train.

  • @MegaMumbles
    @MegaMumbles 11 лет назад +31

    I love this interview. Both the interviewer and the interviewee can hardly form a cohesive statement. It's like back and forth banter. Exactly what I like to see in an interview.

  • @GrandmasDay32
    @GrandmasDay32 7 лет назад +56

    Dude sounds like Chris Griffin. Like he's always on the verge of belching.

  • @michaelhirstny
    @michaelhirstny 5 месяцев назад +3

    Give it up to Ian the interviewer. He got so much interesting stuff out of a famously hard to interview person. The TV "question" was so awesome.

  • @danielstoddart
    @danielstoddart 5 лет назад +75

    "The Boston scene was really straight edge right?"
    "Yeah but I was like at school cos I was kinda came to y'know straight edge kinda on my own and you're just like I was into punk and all the punks seemed like oh they were all junkies and all this stuff and then y'know you find Minor Threat single comes out and you're like wow dude this is way more relatable cos my town was full of hippies and like the way to rebel was kinda not to do drugs I was just so sick of all these acid burnouts around town and so yeah I was already like that's where I was at totally like I just couldn't take it anymore and I just hated drugs and all the druggie hippies and stuff and so when that came out I was like wow this is way more relatable to me than like junkie New York Dolls kinda punk and stuff cos that's y'know exactly where I was at in that moment and so it was pretty awesome."

  • @oaksnice
    @oaksnice 8 лет назад +235

    - And, you know. Yeah
    - Aha yeah
    - But yeah, you know
    - Yeah yeah! So did you?
    - Ahh, uhm yeah
    - Yeah

  • @artblack01
    @artblack01 9 лет назад +58

    He's talking more than the interviewer, that's new.

  • @JOcasio1977
    @JOcasio1977 3 года назад +9

    Jesus christ..I came for an interview and stayed for the guided meditation

  • @peachmelba1000
    @peachmelba1000 9 лет назад +26

    The vocal fry is strong with this one...

  • @airsoftvulture
    @airsoftvulture 3 года назад +9

    writing songs is likefishing just waiting for something to come to u, always knew this never expressed the thought

  • @elmoblatch9787
    @elmoblatch9787 5 лет назад +104

    "I just hated drugs." - not something you hear all that often from rock stars

    • @josh-rz3uq
      @josh-rz3uq 4 года назад +28

      Other than J, there's Frank Zappa, Buzz Osborne, Mike Patton, Ian MacKaye (although I think he would object to being called a rock star), Gene Simmons. Not a whole lot, but they do exist.

    • @Firebrand1967
      @Firebrand1967 4 года назад +2

      @@josh-rz3uqand Ted Nugent.

    • @josh-rz3uq
      @josh-rz3uq 4 года назад +9

      @@Firebrand1967 Yep, but Ted is also insane.

    • @Firebrand1967
      @Firebrand1967 4 года назад +1

      @@josh-rz3uq Ok, whatever...but he IS indeed a straight-edged rockstar nonetheless.

    • @josh-rz3uq
      @josh-rz3uq 4 года назад +16

      @@Firebrand1967 That he is. He's also proof that you don't need drugs to absolutely lose your shit.

  • @gc8972b
    @gc8972b 4 года назад +16

    If I had a friend like these guys back in the day, wouldn`t have been so frustrated and pushed so hard to not look weird

    • @assvibes3866
      @assvibes3866 6 дней назад

      Great comment lol I think this is the function of much RUclips interview watching

  • @snevs
    @snevs 9 лет назад +89

    If you can't sleep put this video on.

    • @FawazK
      @FawazK 3 года назад +3

      This got a chuckle out of me. Thank you.

  • @NickHarman
    @NickHarman 7 лет назад +68

    It's as if they both have wigs on.

  • @ksrhys-
    @ksrhys- 8 лет назад +53

    For the first 10 minutes, this interviewer is weirdly hilarious, he looks anxious like he just saw a spider on J's head but he couldn't tell if it was real or if it was there because of all that acid he took 3:21

    • @RealAsaMitaka
      @RealAsaMitaka 10 месяцев назад +4

      this is the funniest fucking comment ive read in a while

  • @ThePhil230
    @ThePhil230 12 лет назад +14

    He's pretty talkative in this interview. Great stuff, I love Mascis.

  • @Chr_07
    @Chr_07 7 лет назад +195

    Is this an episode of Tim and Eric?

  • @joshuareyna5624
    @joshuareyna5624 5 лет назад +14

    Jay speaks through his guitar playing.

  • @davidjameschamberlain
    @davidjameschamberlain 9 лет назад +6

    how does he not here lou, he's one of my favorite bassists because he sounds so good

  • @paniccat
    @paniccat 11 лет назад +7

    I could listen to his voice all the time, any time.

  • @TheKohlslaw
    @TheKohlslaw 9 лет назад +195

    He reminds me of Chris from family guy but all grown up.

    • @angusbrooks1077
      @angusbrooks1077 9 лет назад +20

      why did you have to draw this comparison :|
      youve fucked it from now on lol

    • @adamelliott3059
      @adamelliott3059 9 лет назад +14

      but talks at Cleveland's pace

    • @grant5603
      @grant5603 8 лет назад

      hahahaha

    • @tomholihan4850
      @tomholihan4850 7 лет назад +2

      Right on. Cleveland-speak ; cadence ,is essentially perfect.

    • @vincemcc79
      @vincemcc79 6 лет назад

      haha - he does sound like him!

  • @mattiasjp
    @mattiasjp 3 года назад +8

    Intense energy from these two guys. 😄
    But I actually think it’s really nice to see.

  • @neaippehtuuppin
    @neaippehtuuppin 4 года назад +3

    When he asked about TV, with some negative connotations, I just laughed, because I knew J mascis was into it, from what I heard. I remember an interview in the early nineties, J Mascis was talking about the soap operas he watched. His response here was like when I was talking to someone at work years ago, and I mentioned how I hated soap operas and TV, and he was like yeah, like he agreed, then went into depth about all the soaps he enjoyed watching.

  • @michaelcarey9359
    @michaelcarey9359 4 года назад +10

    Guy talks about "acid burnouts" in Amherst (they call them "professor" in town), but in all reality, imagine running into Mascis in front of DP Dough, without any clue who this old "acid burnout" is and asking him, well, uhhh.... ummm, yeahhhh anything.
    Yeah, dentist's kid, presumptions and all, just a reluctance to admit he was a bit off back then.

  • @michaeloneill8452
    @michaeloneill8452 3 года назад +4

    J Mascis and Ian can do whatever they want to do. Cant believe they talked for that long.

  • @eveninarcadia438
    @eveninarcadia438 8 лет назад +13

    People hating on the interviewer should do some fucking homework. Ian Svenonius is a legend. He is well respected by everyone he has interviewed for Soft Focus.

    • @wowimaoi
      @wowimaoi 8 лет назад +4

      +Even in Arcadia Maybe so, but that doesn't really mean that people can't dislike him. I watched his interview with Malkmus from Pavement and it made me legitimately uncomfortable the way he linked together such separate events. It sounded along the lines of... "Speaking of real...You like basketball?" WHAT

    • @PAULLONDEN
      @PAULLONDEN 8 лет назад

      +Even in Arcadia
      A 'legend" in New York City art circles.....for the rest he's a sycophant bullcrap spouter...
      Like..."One Of The The Most Bewitching Musicians Of Our Time"........................................
      Just like Mascis he should take some valium to battle his restless legs syndrome,or get behind a fucking table or get an armchair with some sympathetic lighting instead of this uncomfortable cold overexposed setting..which definitely is not very becoming for "J"......
      Then maybe he wouldn't have to pull his socks up or buttoning up his jacket....

    • @ShaneKennedy1969
      @ShaneKennedy1969 8 лет назад +3

      I don't like interviewers who make statements & then expect the interviewee to add to it. They make it too much about THEM.

    • @wetigaz
      @wetigaz 8 лет назад +4

      He may be renowned but he is a bad interviewer in this instance at least.

    • @TetsumatsuKai
      @TetsumatsuKai 6 лет назад

      doesn't mean he is good at interviews

  • @krisdavis1050
    @krisdavis1050 3 года назад +8

    When I want to calm down I just listen to J. talk about music

  • @TheSludger
    @TheSludger 10 лет назад +11

    Mascis got the same voice I have when I get up at 6:00am for going to work ...

  • @joeyrogerson83
    @joeyrogerson83 9 лет назад +8

    J seems surprisingly comfortable, I would think that being these two know each other a bit or that they are two artist types with similar dispositions.

    • @DanHintz
      @DanHintz 2 месяца назад +1

      they played gigs together. ian is a somewhat famous musician too.

  • @WCB360
    @WCB360 11 лет назад +18

    "we're in the united kingdom"
    "..right"

  • @austenslost
    @austenslost 11 лет назад +10

    i can just imagine J opening his basement door and being like "oh shit" XD

  • @adamblister6005
    @adamblister6005 8 лет назад +32

    16:44 wtf is he drinking?????? looks like he almost gagged on it.

  • @jackkeenan2348
    @jackkeenan2348 9 лет назад +25

    Interviewer looks like a werewolf

  • @Noisey
    @Noisey  12 лет назад +8

    We're working on it hombre.

  • @FatherRikhi
    @FatherRikhi 10 лет назад +22

    Man, J Mascis should do more spoken word, killer talking voice and all. I'd buy any albums of him telling childrens stories in a heartbeat.

    • @oppothumbs1
      @oppothumbs1 8 месяцев назад

      Introduction to children, in the voice of J: straight edge gay I say my pledge it ain't easy, up so close, the things she put me through the distance in her eyes make me wait. Hardcore, waiting for the sun, sympathetic ears, bear arms before we sang, they said we are good even if she would no put out. TV's my mass media it's so hot, my girl she's cool, but mass transportation is the only place I think, yeah I think, I'm alone with my thoughts but I got caught in the slipknot.

    • @mercurial71
      @mercurial71 5 месяцев назад

      That would be so good if you had trouble sleeping. “J reads The Hound of the Baskervilles” in ten hours and 8 minutes ❤.

  • @plumanuspranks4899
    @plumanuspranks4899 4 года назад +13

    If you get really stoned with a stranger and then have a conversation this is the result

  • @kevincardinale8969
    @kevincardinale8969 11 лет назад +8

    I've never been able to understand why people don't get that Ian is kidding. It's meant to be satirical--he's pretty obviously putting on an exaggerated personality to make fun of interviewers. Not only that, he manages to reel out genuinely funny questions that are as insightful as the responses they provoke. I think he's totally entertaining and well-intentioned.
    I think if people knew about his history, like that he was in a band on Dischord, they wouldn't be calling him a douche.

    • @DanHintz
      @DanHintz 2 месяца назад

      people are dumb.

  • @grandnaguszek7417
    @grandnaguszek7417 8 лет назад +29

    -You're from Amherst. Are you from Amherst??

    • @esojaloerra174
      @esojaloerra174 4 года назад

      Shouts out A town

    • @jhaj457
      @jhaj457 3 года назад +2

      Brilliant, always check your sources. Better late then never;)

  • @PK-jr3rg
    @PK-jr3rg 3 года назад +3

    too cool, great chemistry always interesting and entertaining!

  • @bmxryan
    @bmxryan 6 лет назад +11

    Did this interviewer want to talk to J about drugs because he was on acid asking questions? #thatSTARE😳

  • @jigrodrigues
    @jigrodrigues 3 года назад +8

    Nice to see Chris Griffin talking about his music

    • @cobra5088
      @cobra5088 7 месяцев назад +1

      I can't unhear it now. It would be funny if family guy did a segment with chris and j mascis conversing.

  • @khaaleliilighntingcoronado9009
    @khaaleliilighntingcoronado9009 5 лет назад +8

    J has inspired me to be sober and clean during my rock n roll journey. ALOT of things led me to being sober but he was a huge reason why. Look at alot of artist they're burnt out, can't sing the same, play the same, hardly have energy or patience. J only focuses on the music instead of drugs and the baggage that comes with drugs and alcohol. Look how long he's been going and how many fucking songs hes created. No drugs or excuses on why he couldn't finish albums or tours.

  • @holoskyrios6158
    @holoskyrios6158 8 лет назад +2

    Wow, what a great interview !

  • @DownUFO
    @DownUFO 11 лет назад +22

    J.'s the king of lazy. watching this video and hearing him speak retroactively undid all the work i've done for the past week,

  • @DanHintz
    @DanHintz 2 месяца назад

    great as usual. every soft focus episode i have seen has been interesting.

  • @devinkhoury4490
    @devinkhoury4490 4 года назад +6

    for some reason that was the shortest 20 minutes ever

    • @mercurial71
      @mercurial71 5 месяцев назад

      Because there were only seven words… Ents take a long time to say anything, but what they do say is very important.

  • @escherpainting8622
    @escherpainting8622 2 года назад +5

    J's clearly a performer. You see him do interviews with no audience and he barely even opens his mouth, but there's a group of (possibly paying?) audience members and he drives the conversation, almost.

    • @gregrohsful
      @gregrohsful 10 месяцев назад

      I think its because the interviewer is an off beat or traditional. Even at dinosaur jr shows he's not talkative.

  • @jerryskid1
    @jerryskid1 11 лет назад +1

    What great format for an interview. Crazy!

  • @thekidwiththefa
    @thekidwiththefa 11 лет назад +5

    Funny that people think that J and the interviewer come off as 'twats'. I like this interview since this guy seems to know how to talk to J and relate to him. This is a super fucking cool interview.

    • @DanHintz
      @DanHintz 2 месяца назад

      a lot of dumbasses in this thread who don't get it.

  • @andrewcameroncline3733
    @andrewcameroncline3733 8 лет назад +7

    question: "you know (band/person/film)? i don't know..."
    answer: "...yeah"

  • @TheReelDealFilmReviews
    @TheReelDealFilmReviews 8 месяцев назад +2

    I thought at the start it was Fred Armisen 😂

  • @Overlorddz
    @Overlorddz Месяц назад

    Saw Dinosaur JR last week in The Hague, oh man that was so awesome and peaceful.

  • @johnnyscifi
    @johnnyscifi 4 года назад +2

    Both J, and Svenonius are ones of a kind!!!

  • @sderoski1
    @sderoski1 3 года назад +1

    I saw Dinosaur at Irving Plaza before they had the first record on Homestead, the show was called the Boston tea party and the other bands were the Neats, Salem 66, and Flies, pretty fun

  • @EctInc
    @EctInc 11 лет назад +6

    Holy fuck I learned something about Scooby Doo. and being from that area, J's reaction hits home.

  • @DukeSecom
    @DukeSecom 11 лет назад +5

    He's probably thinking, '...I've never felt so alive!'

  • @boggy.subtitulos
    @boggy.subtitulos 3 года назад +1

    Lot of energy coming from these guys! Love Dinosaur Jr. tho 👌🏼

  • @Totallydistortedfilm
    @Totallydistortedfilm 11 лет назад +5

    Wow, I just got to hear what J Mascis' ring tone sounds like.

  • @id3072
    @id3072 7 лет назад +35

    Put the speed on 1.25... You'll thank me.

    • @fuddinblackmetal
      @fuddinblackmetal 5 лет назад +2

      This made the interview bearable. Thank you lol

    • @cactaceous
      @cactaceous 4 года назад +1

      Yo! Thanks for the tip idea. Much better. Haha.

    • @davehoward22
      @davehoward22 4 года назад +2

      Put it on 0.25 it takes a month

    • @bobbobbyjones
      @bobbobbyjones 4 года назад

      Thanks

    • @hankgege2199
      @hankgege2199 4 года назад

      Lol😄 dude the whole audience is sleeping and snoring away

  • @masonmanning3955
    @masonmanning3955 9 лет назад +8

    he really likes his negative approach tshirt

  • @aleklockhart1625
    @aleklockhart1625 Год назад

    When he’s taking about oi and call it “the sound of the streets” that got me good hahaha

  • @mingmorgan
    @mingmorgan 7 лет назад

    from barcelona...thanks noisey...thanks ian and of course thanks joe!!!

  • @cryptomnesiac
    @cryptomnesiac 8 лет назад +1

    need to bring this series back

  • @danielthomas1036
    @danielthomas1036 10 лет назад +6

    J is the coolest guy in the world

  • @donculig2525
    @donculig2525 8 лет назад +7

    "you're from... Amherst....are you from Amhert" HAHAHA this interviewer is really good..usually.. this just seems like he's got jetlag or something

  • @poopdogg666
    @poopdogg666 7 лет назад +3

    Wow i didn't know that Ian Svenonius was the interviewer for this show. His music is amazing.

    • @DanHintz
      @DanHintz 2 месяца назад

      most of the idiot comments in this thread come from people who do not get that this is an act and they have no idea who he is.

  • @rod.857
    @rod.857 7 лет назад +8

    J sounds like and adult version of chris from family guy

  • @timsissucks69
    @timsissucks69 10 лет назад +3

    NEGATIVE APPROACH shirt hot damn! saw them with casualties this week

  • @BulletProofSoul1029
    @BulletProofSoul1029 Год назад +4

    I can get what J means about drums. I'm thinking he hears where he wants the fills and accents. I can actually hear that in his song writing now that he pointed it out.

  • @IStehSHIT
    @IStehSHIT 9 лет назад

    I really Love this

  • @HerenowGoneforever
    @HerenowGoneforever Год назад +1

    Another overlooked genius.

  • @jhaj457
    @jhaj457 3 года назад +4

    Interviewer: "Your house burnt down.."
    J: "hmm"
    Interviewer: "I am sorry about that" (13:19) the interviewer looks in a a way like he burnt it down himself.

    • @HillsSilent
      @HillsSilent Год назад

      It's all coming together now...

  • @jasonkim3758
    @jasonkim3758 9 лет назад +9

    yeah... yeah... yeah.... yeah!.... yeah.... yeah....

  • @peteagassi
    @peteagassi 11 лет назад +5

    "I also know, we are in the united kingdom right now..."
    "Right."

  • @ryanjavierortega8513
    @ryanjavierortega8513 7 лет назад +2

    Man, Mascis shoes are dope!

  • @blairmckenzie
    @blairmckenzie 12 лет назад

    anyone know where that castle at the beginning is in the uk?

  • @jvasey
    @jvasey 4 года назад +3

    I wish I was there with a cattle prod for every time the interviewer aborts a sentence

  • @JasonTopo
    @JasonTopo 7 лет назад +8

    13:17 that was weird

  • @phillipolivas7619
    @phillipolivas7619 10 лет назад +20

    Ian seem to be on opiates... Scratching his face the whole interview.

    • @paulpz2004
      @paulpz2004 10 лет назад +7

      yeah his complexion screams, "just stpepped off the good H train"

  • @gorillawalk2
    @gorillawalk2 7 лет назад +3

    What a bizarre ass couple of dudes, don't know if I could hang out at that pace. Man, I love your music though J.

    • @DanHintz
      @DanHintz 2 месяца назад

      you should check out ian's music as well.

  • @thomasraven
    @thomasraven 4 года назад +4

    They really had to dig to find an interviewer who's more socially awkward than J. :P

  • @AlwaysReady4Luv
    @AlwaysReady4Luv 9 лет назад +2

    two super handsome men talkin good stuff bout music *thumbs up*

  • @Beardo138
    @Beardo138 10 лет назад +2

    J Mascis is not a pothead. In fact, he's still straight to this day.

  • @fuzzylumpkin49
    @fuzzylumpkin49 8 лет назад +12

    Great interview. J is awesome. ^_^

  • @jeremyseymour7905
    @jeremyseymour7905 4 года назад +6

    I could care less whether or not musicians/bands are straight edge as long as their stuff sounds great when I'm all bleeped-up. DJ is no exception.

  • @ceevishus4130
    @ceevishus4130 Год назад

    my favorite musician, J. Mascis

  • @dyr234
    @dyr234 3 года назад

    I always though that Ian was just some wacky interview dude then last night I discovered nation of ulysses and I was quite impressed.

  • @timothychase95
    @timothychase95 11 лет назад

    very interesting answer about writing songs with the drum parts in mind...

  • @thisisjables
    @thisisjables 7 лет назад +17

    Who the hell thinks Boston is the LA of the East? Dude is talking out of his ass.

  • @thomasraven
    @thomasraven 10 лет назад +6

    You didn't even tell J there'd be an audience? Fail 1. The interviewer seems to think the whole thing is about him. Fail 2. It looks like this is lit by some work lights from Home Depot. Fail 3. The interviewer thinks he's hidden his crib notes but we see him fiddling with them. Fail 4. All this from the first six minutes.

    • @brunozapaterparreno8760
      @brunozapaterparreno8760 10 лет назад +12

      your comment gave me diarrhea. Fail 5. You're an idiot. Fail 6. You suck. Fail 7