Parents of Teenage Boy Hide his Female DNA from him! | House M.D. | MD TV
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- Опубликовано: 27 фев 2023
- House's team resents being made complicit in a web of lies the parents have told their son when they bring him in for treatment that may be related to his intersexuality.
From House M.D. Season 5 Episode 16 'The Softer Side' - A teenage boy collapses in severe pelvic pain after playing basketball. The parents reveal that the boy has genetic mosaicism, i.e. male and female DNA, and that he is unaware of his condition. When he was born, they chose male for him and raised him accordingly, never telling him about his unique condition.
House (2004) Dr House, an ingenious and unsociable physician who flouts hospital rules, clashes with fellow doctors and his assistants as he comes up with controversial hypotheses about his patients' illnesses.
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Развлечения
"You gave birth to a freak of nature, doesn't mean it's a good idea to treat him like one." Brought tears to my eyes. Deep down, House cares.
You think calling a human being a 'freak of nature' is a caring thing to do?
@@dmf1301 I don’t think that is where this person was going with that. Dr. House said that to his parents to likely give them an emotional smack to how they’ve been treating him as if he needed fixing. An action that could have killed him.
The fact that House did that kind of smack is brave of him and gives a hint that he treats everyone the same. (Even if it’s him being a snot.) It gave the parents a sudden shock, enough of one where they may have thought about it and possibly stopped trying to “fix” their kid.
Please don’t just assume someone is being mean.
Because
Assume makes an Ass of U and Me
Especially if the assumption is wrong.
@@firebladetenn6633 From the perspective of the 'freak of nature' - it WAS a mean thing to say.
And I say that as another 'freak of nature' - I'm not intersex, but that's not the only condition you can be born with that prompts people to call you a freak. It's not actually fun to be called a freak, you know.
He said it right in front of the kid, too! How could that possibly make the kid feel good that his own doctor called him a freak?!
And also... Dr. House is a fictional character. His feewings won't be hurt that I called him mean. If you want to be offended on behalf of a fictional character, I suppose you can be, but I don't believe that makes me an 'ass.'
But if it makes YOU feel happy to call real people names for calling OUT negative behaviour in fictional characters (which happens in the real world, too), then I guess you can go right ahead.
I've heard far worse, as I said. :p
He is a freak of nature
I wouldn't call him a freak of nature, it's a genetic disorder that he didn't cause and it shouldn't be shameful. But because of what his parents did, he probably felt alone and like a freak because he felt different then then the other kids. He is not a freak, he has or her has a rare condition.
I think his parents should have told him way before this point. Intersex individuals deserve the same amount of care as anyone else
Female
@@annikenlittle9644 the child isn’t female; they’re intersex. They possess both male and female sex characteristics.
The child is male, He had some female sex characteristics but he is mostly male. Intersex is a medical condition, a genetic mutation. I wish they had the full episode up so we had the full context. The Gender cultists love to bring Intersex up as evidence that it's some kind of 3rd gender but it's all bullshit.
@@annikenlittle9644 look up intersex..🤦♀️
@@annikenlittle9644 the kid is neither male nor female. We’ll call him “he” since he was raised male, but he has both sets of biology. And he deserved to know it.
Protecting your kids from the truth is not protecting them. It’s just an excuse to protect yourself
This kind of truth can mess with your mind.
@@RKingis A lot of truths will, but it’s better than living a lie
@@jessicajennings9148 Look up the story of David Reimer & Dr. Money.
@@RKingisAnd at some point the truth comes out and everything comes crashing down. It's better to know the truth early than live a lie and suddenly everything falls apart and the person is left standing in the rubble
@@buecherdrache1 That's why I pointed out the story of David Reimer. The twin brothers ended up committing suicide. Had the parents told their twin boys the truth from the start, maybe things could have been better.
I don't care how "difficult" this was for the parents - this is the DUMBEST way they could handle this. What, were they gonna tell him to keep coming home for his vitamin shots after he moved away for college? Tell him they would keep paying for it, no need to go through his insurance at work? Tell doctors to lie to an adult patient?!
They don't think ahead, that's the point.
It's a house of cards but with lies. A lie being supported by another lie or two. Eventually it will fall down.
@@gorillaau Yep
Um, that's kinda the moral reaction the producers want you to feel.
@@forthehonorforge4840 and yet so many people in the comments are trying to justify it
I know someone who is intersex. She is in her 80s now and when she was born the decision was made to bring her up as a boy "because men have an easier life than women!" When she reached adolescence and said she was a girl her mother was furious and blocked every attempt she made to become a woman. When my friend turned 21 she left home and found a doctor who helped her fully become a woman. If a child is intersex you can't decide for the child which gender they should be. Just let them be children until they are old enough to make their own choice.
Men dont have an easier life than women nowadays that is for sure. Back then it was different and admittedly it was still a mans world but times have changed.
The suicide rates are far higher for men than for women, i wonder why...
A doctor doesn't help you become anything. You either are or aren't. Intersex people are what they are, and the real ones have to decide for themselves. A doctor does not change that.
The irony is she fell into the need and desire to be a made up concept that doesn't matter. Man, woman and went out of her eay to have her body altered to appeal to a fake social idea.
The more time you waste fitting into a social construct the more you make your entire exsistant reliant on other and their opinions.
I am me. Me is I. Period. If I felt like a man or a woman. I'd never change anything I'd just be me.
@@forthehonorforge4840 Doctors do assign gender and take gender affirming requests upon parents' request.
@@iwannasleepplz since when? They got paid for it? Like sex or gender is dependent on an experts opinion not on objective reality?
People think kids are a blank canvas that the parents paint on. They’re actually more of a ceramic bowl that’s already been fired up. You can paint on it, but you can’t change it from a bowl to a vase. If you try to change it to something it’s not, it might break. Kids might be young, small, and a little bit stupid sometimes, but they are their own people.
Well said
That's a really beautiful metaphor.
Finally!
Someone who speaks Common Sense!
Great way to put it.
That, and there are many more painters at work than just the parents
Grandparents, extended family, teachers, schoolmates, friends, the parents and grandparents of the latter two
Random people they met that made an impression
"..Did we make the wrong choice?"
You chose to lie to your child, and make a crucial life decision for them without bothering to ask how they felt about it all; yes, you did make the wrong choice, regardless of everything else.
@@RaptorFromWeegee so what happens when it dawns on them santa, the easter bunny, etc isn't real? I can understand lying and telling them that america is a free country so they aren't terrified for their child lives, or that they're the man of the house to make them feel proud or something, but the first example is just going to make them feel bad once they learn
@@lotusleaf1365 Not really. Ultimately, they'll cherish the childhood they had and be all the better for it.
@@RaptorFromWeegee lying about Easter bunny is not the same as lying about their biology
@@rebekahopara4179 Nothings the same as anything. And by the way, it "THE East Bunny", not "Easter Bunny". Bunny is not a surname.
@@RaptorFromWeegee So you're defending that chemically misbalancing your child is okay because children have no agency?
EDIT: Never mind, I read your last reply, and you're just speaking out of your ass.
I love it when doctors go honest on people and I hate it when parents do not.
I'm Muslim, not yet a parent, and not a doctor; you're gonna hate me every which way, so I'm gonna tell you the truth.
Many people regretted having cosmetic surgery, especially when it was botched, not what they expected or they found out that they were bamboozled by the doctor to have it.
Most settled out of court, so you won't see them in the news.
Choose your medical provider wisely, especially if you are getting your gender reassigned!
@@kairinase First, why would I hate you every which way? Second, I would not get cosmetic surgery but, never settle out of court. Third, WHAT is gender re-assignment?
@@glenhardy4770 well its brainwashing without actually saying it
@@collinrist2008 Brainwashing? I believe you are barking up the wrong tree.
@@kairinase What happened? I have been looking for your answers. 😀
My daughter is intersexed. She knew pretty early on. Nobody was allowed to cut her or dose her with hormones.
Thanks
Noice.
good. allowed her body to develop in the direction it was supposed to.
Could you explain how did you tell her all that and at what age?? And did she has to choose one gender: man or woman??
i'm pretty sure it wasn't a conscious choice for the child that it would be a choice made for her by her body, given how the original comment was worded. That the child developed in the more feminine direction.
My question is how do you navigate pronouns and prevent confusion before puberty.
The parents lying to the kid was a grave mistake. Be truthful, even if it’s a painful truth.
imagine if your parents lied to you saying you were the opposite sex keeping that from you and you find out as an adult🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Very true, Thirteen did a great job with this, showing such tact and care. She is exactly what this kid needed at an early age, somebody to help guide the family into making better decisions.
Even worse, imagine if that kid came out as a trans girl. What would the parents do then?@@raven4k998
@@raven4k998I don't see what's funny about that.
It doesn't matter to a BABY if it is intersex. The parents lied to protect themselves from having a child that is against societal norms.
Yeah...except intersex people always favor one sex over the other. This episode is a bit of a misrepresentation.
@@tylerstewart3181 so you take the chances of a 50/50? What happens if you choose the wrong gender?
@@Everlost_Nation it doesn't work that way 😂😂😂
@@tylerstewart3181 Thats not true there are non-binary intersex people. Never say ALWAYS as a rule about human beings, because the only ALWAYS rule is that humans ALWAYS do whatever makes the individual happy.
Fr
No one should "choose" for an intersex person. They are their own people; if they feel strongly to one gender, they can make a choice for themselves. OR! They can be intersex their whole life; if it isn't destroying their health, then they should live life the way they feel.
Medicine did not always have this view
@@jewel65 Medicine also once believed that health was determined by the balance of four humors in the body. Life expectancy was 45 in those days. I'd suggest we listen to medicine today.
@@sycration medical science advocates and practioners once said suffocation and heart inflammation was preferable in practice than natural immune systems. That was also the same people who told you that the life expectancy of the past was 45 years and they should not be questioned now.
I would say that if the person is intersex I which they have no functional reproductive organs, then yes a secondary evaluation is in order in consultation with the intersex person.
I'm sure they were told at the time that they had to choose. Since the child was a baby, they weren't going to choose for themselves.
I always found the "they don't need to know about that" argument stupid.
THE KID IS GOING TO FIND OUT EVENTUALLY!!! It only hurts the parents, and there will be some QUESTIONS for them on why they hid it from them.
Some people use the same logic with adoption and not telling their adoptive kids that they're adopted. You'll damage the relationship with said child the longer you keep it a secret from them.
That and it communicates that the parents don't trust the kid or don't feel they are competent enough to handle the truth.
And if you tell them from the beginning, you can control the narrative and help them feel positive about themself. In the case of intersex maybe “we love you as you are and you tell us if you want to be a boy, girl, or both/neither when you’re ready.” In the case of adoption, “We loved you so much from the beginning, we’re lucky as parents that we got to pick you.”
It hurts the kids and the parents are hurting themselves by being liars
They are just lazy people that don't want to bother having difficult conversations
As a future doctor I can confirm that telling parents "it's your fault" is the best strategy 😂🤣
yes
Fr as someone who dislikes beating around the bush (unless necessary) sometimes they need to hear it straight to get it through their thick skulls
No tell the police and them get the police to tell the parents with a lawyer present
@@jons9721 In the long run, having cops and lawyers micromanaging the raising of children will only result in EVERY parent doing twenty-to-life. My wife and I were determined not to make any of the mistakes our parents did ... and so we came up wth a horrendous assortment of blunders all our own when we raised ours 😊 !
Call the police for what? What they did wasn't illegal. Stupid yes, but not illegal.
@@jons9721
I couldn't imagine having this type of secret kept from me by my own parents!
Maybe you should be more grateful that you'd have parent's that take care of you and care about you enough to do that
@@MybeautifulandamazingPrincessBro? 💀
oh i know how to imagine it
@@MybeautifulandamazingPrincess Bro? 💀
@@realteamwall I think they're just a troll. They keep commenting the same thing under multiple people.
Honestly those two needed to hear some of House's unfiltered brutal honesty a lot sooner, especially the mother.
I honestly would have given them the reality check a whole lot harsher
@@CamdenakaNeptunesdaughter1213 "You'll kill him if you don't accept that he's intersex. If that's what you want, you'll end up behind bars. If that's not what you want, you back off and tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth and accept what he decides to be when he's ready."
@@girl1213not the words I would use.
But I’ll take ‘em
This kid had every right to be mad at the parents
The only ones who can be at fault isn't of the doctors alone, but the one who couldn't accept the reality, letting that treatment go on, and hiding the truth to fit her expectation.
You're 100% wrong and you're an evil person if you agree with the doctor in this scene. She disrespected the parent's and told the kid about his condition, when the parents expressly asked her not to. Based on an assumption
If you watched the full episode, the parents were made to make the decision, when the child was born the doctors then made the parents feel bad for having an intersex child plus it was also frowned upon. This would’ve never happened if hospitals didn’t force parents to make changes to their children’s bodies because of social bullshit. They clearly felt bad about the situation but couldn’t bring themselves to do it, that lady doctor shouldn’t have intervened until the parents wanted to break the news. All and all, doctors shouldn’t be making decisions without the caregivers opinion or forcing them to do anything. Good day.
@@Picassostrash I have watched the full episode and I still say that’s bullshit. So what the doctors made fun of them? Doesn’t mean they still get to hide a huge medical issue from their child.
It’s not their place to decide which gender the kid should be. It’s the kid’s body and and the completely within the kid’s rights to be told about any type of treatment they have to undergo
@@theuzumakikay8647 you’re not understanding my comment. I’m not saying the child didn’t deserve to know, I’m saying this wouldn’t have ever happened if the doctors (that were THERE when the child was born) never forced the parents to make the decision. This is not the parents’ fault. It’s the original doctors who made them pick a gender and made the thing happen. I don’t think you realize that this is quite literally a social issue… in real life. I’m not even speaking on the laughing at the parents, I could care less. If you’re telling me that the original doctors don’t get in trouble for what they have made the parents do, but to you it’s the parents fault, I dont think I could change your mind lol. 🤷🏾♀️
@@Picassostrash I agree the doctors shouldn’t have forced them to make that decision.
But I also feel like they should’ve told the kid long before puberty started so the kid could either decide to take the testosterone stuff or estrogen instead
Why do parents always seem to think it’s better to not tell their children something instead of being honest.
Cause it can really mess with your mind, especially if your sex was assigned.
@@RKingis Better knowing earlier than finding out later
@@luanunes14 Yup! I was 36 when I found out!
@@RKingisthere is no such thing as 'assigned sex'. Unless you are an intersex child, you are either a boy or a girl at birth. Therefore you are either male or female. Only intersex people should be allowed to call themselves non binary, have preferred pronouns and transition if they want. Because they have a legit excuse to do so. Not biological males or females who say they were 'born the wrong gender' because it's trendy or they like traditional gender specific stuff like dolls or mountain bikes.
@@RKingisBut it can mess the child's mind even more if not told, and found out years later by someone other than the child's parents; the two people he is meant to trust. Finding that out can eventually break that trust. It can even lead the child to suicide. Is that what the parents want for their child?
If my parents hid medical information from me like that, I would probably never speak to them again.
Its an insane amount of distrust to introduce into the relationship. The kid can literally never fully trust their parent again after something like that.
@@TheLastSane1or any other person for that matter
My parents lied to me for 30 years.. refused to acknowledge I'm autistic
@@507thDarthbobI'm sorry to hear they lied to you for that long, I have both ADHD and Autism, I was first diagnosed with ADHD as a very young child so my front lone in my brain is still developing until I'm in my 30s and it took until I was about between 13 and 16 to get diagnosed with Autism, the reason it took Autism to be diagnosed in my teen years was that my mum didn't know I would have Autism or if I did have it then she didn't know when I'd get it
The parents just made it harder on the kid. If they had just been honest with him from day one he have a healthier outlook on being intersex. Sadly this is very real. Same with the surgeries performed on very young intersex kids. They cause physical and emotional complications.
It would be confusing for a kid growing up to know this thing but parent still need to inform their kid about it and they should not push thier ideals to the kids let them decides what they want ,like sports and hobbies so they identify thier kids gender prefence ..
@@oh_emm278 Kids are more resilient than you give them credit for. If they grew up with it being normal, they wouldn't be confused at all.
@@Ikajo Depends on the child. If we're talking about a child who happens to be neurodiverse, it could be very challenging. Some of the children with autism I work with have trouble distinguishing between boys and girls, let alone understanding that sometimes people can be both or even non-binary.
@@DigiDestined13 My 34 year old son has autism. He went through a phase in high school when he asked if some people he saw were boys, girls or intersexes. If you treat people who are intersexes as just another group of people so will people with autism.
@@oh_emm278It's not more confusing than anything else. Everything is confusing for children, and teaching them is the only way to lessen that confusion.
Hiding it from their child made it an issue it never needed to be. All that does it create shame. Unnecessarily.
"Did we make the wrong choice?"
It should not be *YOU* who makes the choice...
Actually, if he's under the age of 18, it is their responsibility
@@meggrotte4760 It's not their 'responsibility'. It's their CHOICE whether to make it their 'responsibility' or not.
Nobody should have the *right* to decide on the gender of another person by giving them any sort of drugs/medication BUT the person THEMSELVES.
@@Sapphiresenthiss when a person is legally an adult then they can make a choice
Kids should not be making the choice
@@meggrotte4760 exactly
Right or wrong I've always involved my kids in their own medical care. I did my best to tell them the pros, and the cons. I told them what I would do. I also told them it wasn't my life. Usually they did what I recommended.
You see what many new parents fail to realize and some never figure out. Kids aren't as stupid as adults think they are. Kids are amazingly intelligent and highly resilient. They can handle more than you think they can.
Kids are like sponges, soaking up knowledge and the world around them. Perhaps no hard facts but are amazingly intuitive on what occurring around them.
@@gorillaau That is true. Just uh.. Dont believe that *all* of them are intelligent. Alot of us are, yes, but that doesn't mean there's not bad ones in the batch.
To hide the biological identity of a child that must know as they grow has the potential to destroy the foundation of a family; denial, complacency, self-justification of erratic and deluded choices; all to adhere to a personal set of psychological rules in order to function throughout every day life. A new low for human society
However hard it is, kids deserve to know the truth, whatever the situation
intersecuality is an actual thing that happens, babies born with underdeveloped reproductive organs that can look either male or female, most parents have there child go through surgery at a extremally early age however this often causes issues once the child reaches the toddler years, more often then not it becomes apparent once the child begins puberty, if anyone is worried there child may be intersex the best thing you can do is wait, wait for the clear signs of what they identify as or have often hormone checks to see what hormone is more domain
Sometimes it is not known externally by the parents until puberty.
@@HopeGardner3amed And sometimes even longer
The government 🥼 experiment on us. I still don't understand who told people we can pick or agenda, God is not please. So many lost Souls , rather no souls at all
@@Max-xg4tt I like this take too, because with intersex folk who are not harmed by being left alone, I hate that the end goal is to make them male/female *eventually.* As if they HAVE to go through some medical procedure if the parents will it, or make the child choose. I've met people who grew up without the option and turned out to be trans/nonbinary in spite of what their parents turned them into. And if no harm is done to let them develop as they are, I don't see why it's necessary for the illusion of "normalcy."
Parents quickly choosing a sex, usually the sex of the most developed genitalia, have surgery, and raise the child as that sex without telling him or her....to be clear, that was something DOCTORS and PSYCHIATRISTS used to urge on parents, for decades. The professional fear was that being raised without a sex/gender would be too traumatic for children in Western culture at the time.
Love that House cares for his patients, even in a very sandpaper rough and honest way.
Someone once told me that lies, no matter how benevolent they are, are a whetstone upon which truth is sharpened.
What that means?
The longer you maintain a lie, the more painful it becomes when it inevitably is revealed.
The more you lie, the more you have to make up, and is harder to keep track of the lies.
@@RKingisYou can keep lying about any issue. The truth will come out sooner or later.
@@gracealexandre3381 Well, especially when you can't keep track of the lies. The more you lie, the more you have to build in lies, and eventually, it all comes tumbling down.
It's understandable, they'll probably never forgive their parents for lying to them and keeping the fact they were born intersex a secret. The parents should've let them decide for themselves who they are.
Who is "They"? As House said "just because he is a freak of nature, does not mean he needs to be treated as one."
difficult situation, i think but yeah somehow let your kid grow up and however way possible let them decide weather they want to grow upo female or male
Have some compassion for parents who made that decision years before this conversation was mainstream, when many doctors would have advised parents to pick a gender.
Also, some interested kids don't need hormones and might not know they are different until a health problem occurs, like infertility in adulthood. Casimir Pulaski was a military hero of the American Revolution, had a mustache, male pattern balding, and lives his whole life never knowing. It wasn't until his grave was excavated and an extensive generic investigation was done that anyone knew he was genetically female. Intersex is a whole spectrum.
Being born intersex can cause serious pain and medical problems especially during puberty.
@@lubystkaolamonola529 If OP was intending to treat the child in question as a freak, they’d refer to them as an “it”. Something they didn’t do. “They” is gender neutral, and a pronoun. It’s been used for hundreds of years. Great way to announce you’re incapable of comprehending basic English.
This reminds me SO MUCH of my own experience. My parents found out I was born on the high functioning Autism Spectrum when I was 11 and they told me after they had me go to a lot of social programs til I was 14. They also forced me to do competitive swimming (which I hated) even though I wanted to do something else.
Sorry, but where does swimming lessons fit into this?
@@tripleg2513 being forced to play a sport I didn’t want to like him.
@@ajdoms0187 it's not really the same thing. Swimming lessons are something most parents make their kids do. If they can't afford them they usually teach them themselves.
@@tripleg2513competitive swimming and taking swimming lessons are two different things (sorry if this came off rude I didn’t mean for it to be)
@@tripleg2513 Swimming lessons for all kids is something I support. Competitive swimming is not. If someone doesn't want to swim up and down a pool for hours per week, please don't force them too. This from someone who coached high school swimming for 12 years.
Fun fact: YOU TELL YOUR CHILD IF THEIR BODY IS QUIT LITERALLY DIFFRENT
RATHER THAN LYING AND WORRING ABOUT HIS FEMALE SIDE, WORRY ABOUT TEACHING HIM THAT HE IS DIFFRENT AND THAT HE SHOULD BE HAPPY ABOUT WHO HE IS.
Yes, im aware im using he/him pronouns lets not get controversal, its a show, but in real life if a person wants to change them they can but if they are already defined as something previously then you use what you got for the time being.
"Our new patient. Part girl. Part boy... All Thirteen's dream date." I'm laughing and I really shouldn't be. This is a serious matter and I couldn't stop laughing.
“Why isn’t he better?”
“That’s where your IDIOCY came in.” DAYUM! 😂😂😂😂😂
i dated an intersex person once. luckily, they (preferred pronoun) were told by their parents from a young age. it helped a lot when medical emergencies came up. TELL YOUR KIDS THE TRUTH.
So uh did the have both parts? Did ya do it? how did they prefer to look? More masculine or feminine or neutral?
Parents often forget what the consequences will be. Kid grows up to find out his folks weren't honest that's it damage irreversible.
This kind of truth can really mess up your mind.
@@RKingisagreed because that child when they become an adult will end up finding out why their parents lied to them as a child instead of being 100% truthful to them as a child
@@PrinceYamiUchihaCosplay Plus, it's fairly common even when they don't know, there are events in their lifetime that causes them to wonder if they're male, or female.
Best way to never see your "son" again once he hits 18....
To be honest, those parents were just lazy. They wanted everything to resolve itself without having to take any responsibility
This is exactly why therapy should be thoroughly tried before any medication or surgery.
3:16 "i wanted to dance but my parents says no"
Well i see they are not really doing the best for their child, arent they?
You never realize how much you miss shows like this until you see the junk they have on cable today.
Why are you still paying for cable television in 2023? TV is literally brainrot. Always was. Get a hobby or use streaming services to watch something with actual intent, and not just mindlessly waste all your free time flipping through channels.
These parents are morons. This isn’t the kind of thing that can be hidden forever. What would it be like if he found out as an adult? What a perfect way to make your kid hate you and never want to see you again.
They stole their child's autonomy. Not treating your child like a separate individual is the definition of a bad parent.
By today's standards, yes absolutely. But it used to be this was actual advice doctors gave to the parents of intersex children, and this episode actually starts with a flash back of when the kid was born where that happens.
as a "freak of nature" in OTHER ways, it actually feels kinda... nice...
to be told I'm worthy of at least being treated with dignity.
This is why you dont do this to kids, you tell them the truth and naturally their body and mind will be more prominent in one of the genders. Lying to a kids would cause humiliation, depression and trust issues. But if he knew he would know why he was different instead of probably feeling like a freak when of course he is not. A genetic disorder is not shameful. But doing this to you kids is.
If I had an intersex child, I’d give them a gender neutral name and let them decide when they are old enough to understand 🤷🏽♀️
Many intersex conditions don't become obvious until puberty doesn't go as expected.
Those parents have a lot to apologize for.
0:11 the foreshadowing of Forman saying the correct diagnosis immediately
Lying is simpler than telling the truth? Sounds like the guilty conscious of someone who doesnt want to face consequences.
Lying is almost a guarantee to break trust. Is that a worthy risk?
Happens to intersex kids still.
To be clear, not all intersexed infants and their parents know, sometimes for years and years...in the past, sometimes never!
Casimir Pulaski lived his whole life, was a military success, traveled hundreds of miles to become an honored hero of the American Revolution, died and was buried never knowing he was genetically female. Among other things, he had a mustache and male pattern balding.
He even has counties named after him in seven states.
This comment intrigued me so I looked into it.
Turns out, it's just a popular theory as the guy died from a cannon blast of grapeshot in 1779, to have his remains (maybe) discovered 74 year later in 1853. The examination and DNA tests were inconclusive.
@@El_Kalvoda Well that's a let down. Sounded so interesting!
What kind of teacher would assign the poetry of Sylvia Plath to eleven years old kids!! Wtf?
She put her head in the oven while her kids were napping in the other room!
Yeah, the writers should have talked to some English teachers. Probably would have been better to cite a popular song or a celebrity who died from suicide as an inspiration for his poem.
@@emilyrosine7801 1000%, Emily.
A popular musical celebrity, or even a more accessible poet with a broader range of emotional tone,
and then the child choosing a melancholy option from their work to emulate, would have made a lot more sense.
Midcentury, bleak confessional poet whose complex, challenging poems were full of very adult problems and above all mental health struggles and suicidal ideation?
At this point, very few teachers would assign that to a class of 11 year olds for so many reasons!
"hey kids. Why don't you write a poem about really leaning into suicidal ideation? I'm sure this won't cause any problems for either of us"
I doubt even most high school English teachers would give such an assignment now.
To be honest the poetry unit in 5th grade involved Poe, Plath, Hughes and Silverstein. Did we understand it all, no but we started to understand broader emotional literature.
You also have to remember that between 10-12 is when Shiloh, Old Yeller, Where the Red Fern Grows, Hatchet, and The Giver are pretty standard literature.
My 12th grade teacher made us read Sylvia Plath so I was 17/18 and I remember absolutely hating it, it was so depressing
This kid is too pure for this world 🥺🥺
Intersex people aren’t freaks of nature though.. it’s more common than we realize, some people don’t even know it exists to begin with and yes, it’s relatively rare, but so are lots of things. It doesn’t make you a freak
It's honestly not even as rare as we think. It's just as rare as red heads.
@Taco Bell right there's more of us than redheads. People are just ignorant 🙄
@@phoenixstarseed6088 You're still male or female. 😘
@@YTWXNot always. Some intersex people end up identifying as male or female but not all of them.
@@MellowMink NOPE.
"we wanted to protect you" yeah sure you totally didn't want to mold him to your liking.
That's not really what happened here. In the full context of the episode, they were following the advice given to them by doctors when the kid was born. It was a different time, and back than this was considered standard practice for intersex children. Medical and psychological experts thought children needed to have a proscribed gender to grow up healthy and well adjusted. Parents would be pressured into both making the choice and hiding it from their children.
To be clear, I'm not saying that makes it right, only that the parents are probably being honest when they say they thought they were doing the right thing.
I think the parents were being honest about their intentions - They really did think they were protecting their child from the "curse of being born different" so to speak.
They were wrong, and perhaps deluded in thinking they could maintain the lie, or that it was right to maintain it - These parents in this episode always struck me as the types to keep putting off telling Jackson a little bit longer and a little bit longer forever, until something forces their hand to do so. And something would - At the latest, imagine when he moves out and doesn't have his "vitamins" anymore.
The thing is that the harmful part isn't the truth, or the lie, but the act of lying. All the work put into hiding the truth, into carefully crafting a mirage and placing blinders over their child's eyes to keep him from looking at what they're afraid of him seeing - That's exactly what Jackson found hurtful ("you knew ever since I was born..."), and that only gets worse over time.
Boys can do dancing and like boys not just girls
The conversation was much more basic circa 2010
Maybe you're neither. Maybe you're both. Maybe you're just a human being.
The sad part is that this is common irl. Like so many people don't find out that they were intersex until way later in life. As well as some documents will perform surgeries on intersex kids without even telling the parents.
It's poetic that the parents' lies and overprotectiveness eventually got them to spill out that he is partially a girl.
Things like this is why I get so frustrated and annoyed when people accuse trans people of being obsessed with gender.
This child is intersex, neither fully female nor fully male, yet the idea of him not being able to conform entirely to one or the other is extremely distressing TO THE PARENTS.
In a world where society wasn’t obsessed with gender, the child could just grow and develop in peace and decide which gender, if any, he wants to identify when he’s older.
Most trans people aren’t intersex, though. And unless you’re intersex, I don’t think you can just magically change your gender.
@@sunshineimperials1600 not really my point as I was talking about transphobes accusing trans people of being obsessed with gender, when the opposite of true.
But since you brought up this entirely new and unrelated topic:
There have been numerous and consistent studies that and have brain neural structure of trans people more closely match the gender they identify as than the sex they were born with.
It’s wild that some of y’all will fully believe that the humans body can be intersex, but refuse to believe the brain cannot also deviate from the sex binary.
The brain is part of the body. If the body can mix things up, so can the brain.
@@percyross7612 Brains deviate all the time, that’s why we have mental disorders such as schizophrenia and chronic depression. Should we allow them free-range over everyone else, or properly treat them in medical facilities?
@@sunshineimperials1600
A simple deviation from the norm is not a good enough reason to isolate, discriminate or force mental treatment on them.
If there is no objective problem their state causes, it's up to them to decide how they want to interact with discrepancy between the identification of the brain and their assigned gender or their biology. The brain holds the person's character. Not the body.
@@sunshineimperials1600: We do treat them. We give them gender affirming care, like HRT and surgeries. That's not "free-range over everyone else," whatever that's even supposed to mean. It's literally just helping them get a body which more closely resembles what their brains tell them they are supposed to be.
"Did we make the wrong decision?"
The right decision would be to tell him the truth
"Eventually you have to talk to your parents again"
You really don't, ever
Cases like this, parents should try to be like Superman's parents; tell your kid the truth, that they're not like "normal" people and the world probably isn't going to understand but your family is. Being different is hard, but it's even harder if your family give you reason to think they don't accept you for who you are either.
It's always so interesting seeing the reactions of people who didn’t know this was a real-life thing and/or didn’t believe it was real
I think this is a complicated issue, but I also don't like how much it conforms to gender stereotypes. Just because he/they like dance more than sports means that they're a girl.
Early 2000s... was sadly very common. MD. House was fairly progressive for the time, but not nearly progressive enough.
it was just the kid who said that. the doctor didn't agree. she was just trying to let him decide for himself without persuading him.
Similar to what another commenter said, the show was not saying "if you like sports that makes you a boy, if you like dance that makes you a girl." The mother, from an older generation that pushed gender norms hard, tried to enforce gender norms out of fear that she made the wrong choice ("if they like dance, maybe they were meant to be a girl and I chose wrong for them - but if I get them into sports and they like it maybe I didn't make the wrong choice"). It's not good logic, but fear and confusion rarely lead to good logic.
The child, now questioning their gender identity, also asked if their friendship with a boy was actually romantic feelings for the boy simply because there was a chance they may identify as a girl.
Boys can have romantic feelings for boys. Girls can have platonic friendships with boys. And this character likely knew that, but again fear and confusion rarely lead to good logic.
The doctor actually made the point that she also plays/played basketball and was "talking sports" with the kid. The show was not trying to enforce or encourage gender norms, it was trying to point out the subtle and not-so-subtle ways we push gender norms in real life.
@@RilianSharp and @Dani Flaherty, I suppose you're right, but I think it's just something that could be very easily misconstrued by the cishets™ if you know what I mean
@@Joey-kd8lj It seems ironic that you say it could be misconstrued "by cishets" to endorse stereotypes.
The people I see who misconstruct it the most seem to be *Trans* Rights Activists, whether or not they are trans. TRAs keep on acting as if trans-identified people are being women/ men by conforming to stereotypes. There is, for example, an executive who goes by the name Pippa Bunce on some days and Philip Bunce on others. He claims to be a man on some days, and a woman on other days. Guess on which days he wears pink dresses?
Transgenderism as currently understood (not every trans-identified person) is one big endorsement of stereotypes, a claim that stereotypes matter more than your body in making you what you are.
But of course, this kid is not trans and you and I are both discussing another topic now, one we got to based on the kid's dancing/ baseball interest.
"We hoped it would be simpler for you" doesn't work out because people are complicated. There's nothing shameful about it until you make it shameful. Being intersex is just another cool variation of humanity, like eye color or height or skin tone. It's also roughly as common as having red hair!
This is so infuriating!!! I don’t know what it’s like to be intersex or to be lied by my parents about it. But when my parents found out I was on the high functioning Autism Spectrum when I was 11, they didn’t hide it from me, they had me go to social programs to actively improve my social skills instead.
My daughter is as well..did it take you a long time to start talking properly.I try my best to educàte people around her but I dont want her to be uncomfortable.sorry to pry
If i found out my parents hid something like this from me, i would disown them. No contact. They can roam off and rot.
We need to create awareness to THESE CASES and STOP GENITAL MUTILATION OF INTERSEX CHILDREN!
Everyone is so focused on first world countries about mental health issues created on healthy children who weren't "assigned at birth", and ignore the real issue and the horrors committed by John Money's Gender Identity Theory at John Hopkins Hospital.
All 3 of them
House being a trans, intersex and LGBTQ ally all while being an absolute asshole is the best thing
House isn't bigoted, he hates everyone equally.
I spent a life time of pain dealing with intersex. My parents and doctors messed up and failed in every way you can imagine,
If you don't mind sharing, how old are you? Hopefully the recent acknowledgment that such people exist will help the generation who are kids now.
@@loudidier3891 Im 72 years old and I very active working.
Intersex is not rare, about 1.7% of the population has one form or another of it.
I have an extreme form of one of the more common types of this. Even today I find many in the medical community have little working knowledge of these conditions. But with exposure the word is getting out and slowly pe
ole are learning about us and how we should be treated.
@@davidmicheletti6292 as a doctor, I am so angry with how this has been dealt with. It’s truly abusive to children, and I’m so sorry you had to go through that. It reminds me of the nonsensical obsession with forcing kids to be right-handed. It’s just as ridiculous that we force gender upon kids, and the trauma it leaves them with is unforgivable.
@@cassie1790 Thank you for your comment.
@@cassie1790 is there any cause or contribution that turns a fetus intersex from the parents or during pregnancy?
I can't with House saying 'all 13's dream date' while looking at her, and Thirteen giving him a side eye 🤣😂
Someone please tell the kid that him liking boys doesnt have to mean hes a girl. Its ok if he is. But he doesnt have to be
Pov: No father figure
It's not that simple for a intersex child.
Intersex humans are not freaks of nature. Poor kid. His parents shouldn't hide that type of information ever.
He said that the kids a freak in nature due to how incredibly rare it is for any living being to be born with both female and male DNA
@@zoylist8it's actually not as rare as we think. It's as common as red heads.
@@tacobell1299 well considering how only 1.7% of the world population was born with intersex traits (there’s different forms to it though) and how only 2% of the world population are actually red heads, I’d say it’s pretty rare and yes with 7.888 billion people in world that’s still a large amount of both redheads and intersex people it would still be defined as quite rate
@@tacobell1299that’s sort of a fallacy. It’s much, much rarer than redheads to have a truly intersex person. It’s only by including relatively common hormone disorders that you get that stat. And those people with such conditions don’t really consider themselves intersex, nor do they fit the typical understanding of the term. Intersex like the character in this clip is super, exceedingly rare.
They kind of are. It’s not a genetic normality.
Great episode.
Funny how Foreman is not only the first one to speak up, but also calls out the correct diagnosis within the first 10 seconds.
i can sympathize with the parents, but their way of raising an intersex child was so wrong
Lying to ur Child is never the right choice if they start to ask question. Stay silent aslong as they dont ask? Sure. Lying to their face? No. It will come out at some point and the earlier they get to know about it the more time they have to figure their life out.
4:25 this scene succinctly shows why it is important to teach kids about sex, gender and the more complicated aspects of it.
Because kids inevitably interract with those complicated aspects, as shown in this episode.
And when they end up interracting with those aspects, and all they know about intersex people is that they are the thing that is when you are not a boy or a girl, and have spent your entire life being told that those two are the normal options, you will end up like the kid in this clip. Thinking you are a freak.
When if we taught kids about intersex conditions better, this scenario would be less likely. Cause it would be more normalised to the kid experiencing it.
And while yes, the kids around them would likely use it as a point of attack for bullying, as kids will commonly use any difference to do that, it won't be an automatic response like you see here.
I feel like intersex people are always, left out in discussions about gender and sex. They are rarely talked about. I wonder if intersex people feel the same way and if that's a problem for them.
I am so SICK of the excuse of “we were just trying to protect you”. No you weren’t. You were trying to make things easier for YOU at the expense of your child’s wellbeing. These lies landed him in a hospital bed! Kid has every right to be angry. This is why I applaud House for being real here. He may have sounded mean and uncaring with his words but I don’t care. I’d much rather a mean person tell me the harsh truth than for “nice” people to tell me a comforting lie. Because it seems like the mean person cares more for the child than the “nice” parents do. This is why I don’t trust nice. Nice doesn’t mean kind or caring.
House: (To parents) that's where your stupidity came in. He was just dehydrated. You nearly killed your kid because you feared him making choices on his own.
The kid deserved to know from the beginning. They were gonna find out eventually.
House: You gave birth to a freak of nature.
Kid: I'm still here!
They couldn't do an MRI without House's agreement, so he can't blame the parents' idiocy without his complicity
Oh boy, I'm sure the comments in this video will be extremely thoughtful, sensitive, and normal.
These parents should not have kid
Poor kid
No you were trying to protect your perfect image of a child. My brother is adopted my mother never lied to him and told him the truth that he was adopted. You always tell children the truth. If you don't they don't trust you and they're supposed to you're their parents.😢😢
It's not that simple in these cases.
@@RKingisThe kid was born intersex, neither male nor female. Trying to force them to identify as one or the other through deception is the problem here; it's very simple to understand that.
@@MellowMink Tell that to my family! 😂. They've been rather nasty.
I mean the fact that they give him androgens would suggest that despite being born intersex,that biologically he was supposed to be female. Intersex doesn’t necessarily mean they’re both per say it just means that they can have some traits from XX and some traits from XY. The parents decided they wanted a boy but it seems rather counter-intuitive if they have to give him male hormones to be male.
Not really, intersex is also know as "true hermaphrodism" which means that the reproductive system and whole body is both male and female and is fully functional unlike some other forms of sex chromosomes. They give him testosterone so he can have a male puberty. It has nothing to do with him being a female since he was neither male nor female to begin with but somewhere in between. Doctors meddling with his body is what gave him all of these issues
Second time I've seen a clip where House says something horrendous like that to or in front of a child patient. I know he's meant to be rule-shirking and rough around the edges, but "freak of nature" in front of a 13 year old who's already talking about suicide? Wtf. And saying it in reprimand to the parents doesn't make it less damaging when the kid is right there.
What was the other one?
@@brandoncolis3841 S2E13 where he tells a 15 year old that she's not a girl, in the most callous way possible. And again it seems like he might be trying to aim the snark at the parent in the room, but it's still really crappy.
To be fair, the 15 year old girl in the other episode was a manipulative sociopath, so House may not have been very empathetic toward her. Here though, he shouldn't have said that, I agree.
The kid wasn't talking about suicide; the parents found the poem, assumed the worst and misled the doctors about his mental health. He might have felt something similar to that, but he said he gets sad but doesn't consider suicide.
@@aiki2803 Okay well "freak of nature" coming from a doctor is probably not going to do anything positive.
This is hurting so deeply man
So they didn't bother to check for the contraindicators for the contrast dye at all? I'm at least assuming a simple blood test would have shown his kidneys functioning below capacity before hand due to the dehydration, they would have ordered dialysis right after or not have done it at all. 😒
These parents are the kinds of people who think it's in trans kids best interests to shut down their attempts at being comfortable with themselves. Simply because it's not simple enough. Thus, when it's actually a physical problem of intersexuality, that kid's life and mental stability is put in danger.
Intersex, not trans. Very different.
@@frenchfriedbagel7035yeah he knows. The comment says these parents are that Kind of people who would do that. He’s not equivocating trans and intersex people.
You should study intersex surgeries. Lying is nothing new, nor enforcing stereotypes of genders. But they did choose his sex.
Parents must be from Florida.
I too am a freak. Not intersex, but a freak nonetheless. Welcome to the club, kid. 😂
Why wouldn't you tell the kid? That makes no sense.
I was normal as a kid but very shy. I was called freak by others, just becsuse I was shy. And yes, it hurt so bad. And then, as a teen, the name calling got worse when they started doing drugs and I wouldn't. I eventually found music as an out. I became a musician because, not only was music beautiful, but music never judged me either. And even as a musician still manage to stay away from drugs, only I wasn't called a freak anymore.
God bless you ❤
parents made a critical mistake withholding this important piece of health information. If your kid developed diabetes you'd tell them so they'd know how to navigate the world with it, manage, and take care of themselves and most importantly learn to advocate for themselves and their healthcare when they are adults. Its the same if your kid is intersex. Their bodies are not the same as most people. They gotta know so they also know how to navigate the world and how to take care of themselves, communicate and advocate for themselves when it comes to medical issues.
Tell her or face prison.
such an important topic!!!!