LETTING GO OF THE NARCISSIST
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- Опубликовано: 7 сен 2024
- #narcissist #narcissisticabuse Letting go of a narcissistic relationship can be one of the hardest things anyone can do. It can be hard to understand why letting go of an abusive, destructive person can be so difficult. Trauma bonding, gaslighting and confusion can keep us hanging on to something that is destroying us.
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Here is contact information for when immediate help with abuse or self harm is needed. It is recommended that you use a computer or phone that your abuser cannot monitor:
Emergency: 911
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1- 800-799-7233
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
National Hopeline Network: 1-800-SUICIDE (800-784-2433)
Crisis Text Line: Text "DESERVE" TO 741-741
Lifeline Crisis Chat (Online live messaging): suicideprevent...
Self-Harm Hotline: 1-800-DONT CUT (1-800-366-8288)
www.ywca.org/w...
YWCA - 202-467-0801
Canadian Assaulted Women's Helpline: 1-866-863-0511
UK National Domestic Abuse Hotline: 0808 2000 247
South Africa POWA: 011 642 434/6
Australia: 1-800-RESPECT
Thank you for sharing this and stepping forward to help other survivors, I know I feel absolutely ashamed with myself for thinking my ex covert narcissist was ever anything worthy of my love, time, or attention. It's really painful to go through this type of abuse and to try to heal from it. But one thing I want to point out is the narcissist targets good people for a reason, because they have value and we survivors can move on and heal from this experience because we have all the things the narcissist envys and is jealous of, we are strong, caring, compassionate, people who have a lot to offer others, the narcissist wants our characteristics, our joy and happiness that they can only ever pretend to have, that's part of the reason they try to tear us down, because they hate what they can't have and if they can't have any light they want to try to destroy yours, deep down they know they are horrible and worthless and if they can bring you down it makes them feel better about how pathetic they know they are. It's sick and twisted but that's what they are all about, please understand your value and worth my fellow survivors, stay strong!
EXACTLY they pull you down into their sadistic world, it's sooo twisted was married to a narrisist for 28yrs it was belittled and made to feel unworthy and continually abused and chested on, now live in peace and see him for what he really is they cowards and BULLIES, do leave go its only way to get your life back.
Thank you for this amazing comment ❤
Said with real empathy. After watching this video, I actually started to let go of the anger and said to myself for the first time, 'it is time to let go'.
🙏🏽 💯
It was like passing a final exam.
I fell for her, 1985. We married, 1996. We had a child, 2006, and I finally "met" her, 2018.
Fuckola...that bad idea sure had a long fuse, now didn't it?
I completely understand. A relationship with a narcissistic person isn't like any other previous relationship where 2 people simply determine that they just aren't meant to be together. Those relationships can be painful as well...but definitely not as painful as dealing with a narc. Truthfully I don't give a crap about the narc I had my children with. It's not about him. Hasn't been for year's. What constantly worries me as a mother are the extremely harmful effects it had on my children... It's absolutely 💔 The narc doesn't co-parent. They counter-parent. It's an extremely dark energy you are dealing with from day one. I pray for my children constantly. Their father was and is extremely well versed and keenly aware of his diagnosis. He always knew exactly what he was doing to play all of us like mere chess pieces. People need to be extremely aware that God has witnessed 'everything'. Please have faith 💚🙏💌 You aren't/weren't 'crazy'... Only the narc want's you to believe that...They will try to win at any cost to your well-being, sanity as well as their perceived belief that they 'own' your children's mind's, heart's and soul's. Let Go and Let God...🎯
I have an adopted schizophrenic bpd brother. Everything is the world's fault. Has blamed since he could talk. This condition is the epitome of this narcissistic trait. Shame on handing my life over to this manipulative person to figure out. Thank you for, in a sense, being my emotional instruction guide in managing this difficult person I inherited. No wonder I had married into another family of them, unknowingly. Every word you say is 100% spot on. To the point.
Let go and cut ties like Im doing now.
Thank you I feel like you really care about survivors
You’re welcome. I do and I’m glad that comes across. ❤️
Your caring comes across very strongly. We appreciate you. All blessings to you. ⭐👍
@@jenniferyates8100Absolutely
Healing from narcissism is indeed difficult due to the trauma bond, not love. We also have to come to grips with why we couldn't see who they really were, and why we didn't pay attention to clear red flag warning signs. Of course they didn't show us who they really are, but they often show over the top mirroring and praise and flattery at your point of weakness. Plus they even fool the professionals who diagnose them and treat them, so they are really good at convincing you and acting. The red flag warning signs are harder to identify with a covert narc. who is very manipulative and has really good excuses.
Plus you have to reconcile that the person you thought they were is not at all who they are, so you are having to grieve who you thought they were. The addiction to the narcissist and the nice-mean cycle is very difficult. We bond to others more closely through intense emotional experiences, positive or negative. In the love bombing cycle you are bonding through heightened positive emotions, and then when they begin to devalue you, it's all negative, woven with nice behavior.
It's true the narcissist sees the problem as you, fully you. They project all their behavior onto you. Often if we are empaths we will attract narcs, but we have to get really good at paying attention to our gut sense, and detecting red flag and yellow flag warning signs and having a three strikes and you're out. Anyone can goof once or twice, but three times shows a pattern. Then too, if someone is causing you stress, is unable to respect your needs and boundaries, then it's time to give them a wide birth or cut them out of your life completely.
Well said. Thank you.
Perfectly perfectly said👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Most people can’t come close to understanding this
I can remember how at some point I felt somehow one dimensional and it began to strip away at my sense of value. I fought back and got out of that Narc rut. I’m free!
Thank you. I miss her and she was a friend. It’s so hard to accept that this is how she was. But the behavior fits. So hard to accept that she is this broken. But nothing else seems to fit. She came to me in need and in a panic and I helped her so much and invested so much. And thought we developed a real and special friendship. And I was manipulated and fooled. Feels so bad and so hurtful.
So sad, you can hear the emotion in her voice. Totally identify
I could write a book, I think we all could. You may never see the justice, but God knows and he will deal with these people.
This is unusually sincere. Thank you for sharing.
I fell for her, 1985. We married,1996. We had a child,2006, and I met her, 2018.
Wow! This hit deep…I feel ya…good luck❤️🩹
I fell for him, 1974, we married 1984, had a child 1997, and a stranger stood before me in 2018.
Thank you for being you. I can sense your deep compassion for others and desire to help hurt people heal.
So I just found out today that the person that I was involved with almost a year was a narcissist and it hurts deeply. I was forced to walk away because he just all of a sudden just quit want to talk with me and if he did he was extremely hateful and mean for no reason.. this video does really help and thank you so much for posting this This truly does help a lot!!
I wasn't sure this video would apply, its not a partner but a grandmother that is on my mind with this. But every single thing still applies. It feels like she died. And a family legacy I deeply cared about with her.
So true , always get the blame. Progect what they are doing on to you👎No matter how much you loved them.
Spot on...! Very accurate! 🙏 "Blame" business is shocking 😢! After all they have done x
Another great video thank you 🙏🏾 ❤️
Thank you!
I was with my ex for 4 years. The relationship was toxic from the beginning. She never respected my boundaries. No matter how I approached her about it. She alway made things up to be mad at me about. She wasn’t outwardly angry. Sometimes but not always. She was mostly passive aggressive. She would poke until i lost my cool and then used my anger against me. Until i just completely check out. Mentally and physically. I didn’t want to do anything. Just go to work and crash on the couch. Which she even up using that too. I found out about 3 months ago she was cheating on me. Lied to my face multiple times when I confronted her. So I moved out. 2 days after i moved out she moved that person in. Now she’s living her “best life” with this new person. Giving them everything i begged her for. Sucks getting past all that. Especially since I ended up being homeless and living out of my car. She hasn’t once called to see if im okay or if im even alive. Like i never even mattered to her. Like the past 4 years of building a life meant nothing to her. She just moved on. I cry every day about it. Especially at night. I know things will get better eventually. But i finding it hard to cope with it all.
Perfectly said
The Narcissist also knows that you’re too nice to ever be able to hurt them back. They take advantage of that
i am in the process of awakening to my partners narcissism and looking back at thirty years of my own constant giving her another chance. I feel foolish beyond belief to constantly being trying to "allow" for the hard life she has had. A person of colour, abandoned as an infant, poverty, racism and more must have forged a personality of extreme self protection that would never be hurt again and I thought I could help her find the kindness she had lost. Can't be done! I have ended up feeling that I have failed. Wish me luck!
Despite knowing all I know, its so so hard to heal, to let go and forget... a year in since I was replaced, and it still hurts as though it happened yesterday 😔
Where's the letting go part? Oh just take it and move on. Great, that's what she said. Thanks
I appreciate you
Very well done. Thank you! It's incredible work your are doing. Thank you angel.
It honestly felt like a death. Though I wanted out of the toxic marriage, the initial separation was so sudden. He just left, moved and completely abandoned me and our 2 young children, left behind a huge mess for me to clean up, all the bills, and left me to do all the work to fix the house and sell it, all on my own. He attempted to hoover, saying he found God, and wanted us to do counseling. (I heard that many times before so I didn't fall for it) it's been 3 years and the first 2 years was complete hell, goingthroughdivorceand custodybattle, so many false accusations, flying monkeys, his entire family turned against me and harassed me. Now it's all over and he is gone. He didn't want to have anything to do with the kids, just wanted to fight me in court. They use the court system to further abuse you. We are at peace, I've bought a new home in a different state, going back to school, expecting to graduate with my Batchelor degree in November this year. My only struggle is dating, I would like to find someone to build a healthy relationship with but scared to death. I have 2 narc ex husband's, the first one tried to kill me, literally, and the second tried to destroy me in every area of my life.
Feel for you
Glad to hear you are on the other side of hell and healing…fellow survivor..Good Luck❤️🩹
Yea there is justice !
Thank you so much for your help, for understanding and validating, you are awesome!
Thank you! I’m glad my content is helpful. 😊
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I will keep watching your videos while I go through the divorce with my narcissist. I'm scared ,worried , how he's going to respond too being served .
After so many years with a Narco I just can’t move on but I am liking your advice which is giving me much needed hope Thanks
Another great video! Thank you for posting.
Yes ( typo)
Thank you
I have been listening to videos on narcissists since 2019 and you are my favorite. You get right to the point without the technical details. Do you offer any one on one services? I’ve really struggled to find support in leaving my 24 year narcissistic marriage
I don’t do any one on one services, but I hope my content can be helpful. I would encourage you not to give up on finding professional one on one help. Either way, you can find a way through this as long as you don’t give up on yourself.
There were no dreams only lies...❤!Thank YOU!🙏
I’ve just been betrayed for the tenth and hopefully the last time. And you are exactly on point with feeling like they’re dying. A part of you dies too. But I must shed the skin to start anew ❤
Thank you so much, it hurts really bad, your words made me feel better. Thank you🙏🏾
U are so real and authentic what u said really resonated with me thanks so much ❤❤
very helpful, thank you
❤
Gggreat video and great music
Thanks once again. This video explained a lot to me!
And they left right after the baby was born
All of this stuff sounds a lot like this guy we had in charge of our whole country, not too long ago.. Man, what was that guys name again, really really orange looking guy, wrote love letters to dictators and junk.. you know the one I'm talking about, right? Seems like an extremely angry guy, same triggers and all that.. maybe I'm wrong but wow, wouldn't it be horrible if a narcissist was actually in charge of our entire country? We wouldn't let something like that happen tho, would we? We wouldn't, would we?
And you think pedo Joe is better?
💔💔💔💔💔💔
What if you did marry them and have a baby and a house
It’s hard because the guy is weak point blank
I keep finding narcs cuz my mom is one but now that I know what it is I’m trying. To not be with one and catch it early on 🫶