Divorced for not having curves

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  • Опубликовано: 21 окт 2024
  • How does a woman get divorced after a week of marriage? This is why compatibility and vetting before marriage is important.
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Комментарии • 355

  • @alvirarahman1559
    @alvirarahman1559 3 года назад +179

    Hope this sister finds another beautiful soul from Allah (S.W.T), who loves her for who she is. Ameen.

    • @aaminahdiallo229
      @aaminahdiallo229 3 года назад +9

      Amin ya Allah; this is so sad and sickening from this guy

    • @Ahmed-ye5sd
      @Ahmed-ye5sd 3 года назад +3

      Ameen

    • @AC-mp7cx
      @AC-mp7cx 3 года назад +1

      Women be obsessed with height and alot of other stuff lmao

    • @alvirarahman1559
      @alvirarahman1559 3 года назад +6

      @@AC-mp7cx Both sides have good and bad, but hey, thanks for showing male toxicity here.

    • @alvirarahman1559
      @alvirarahman1559 3 года назад +3

      @@sheikhjahidhossainjunayed4525 u spelled Nazi wrong. I suggest u go back to school and get educated before lecturing people here.

  • @opocoyo
    @opocoyo 3 года назад +244

    If he knew that her being curvy was so important then why did he marry her? Weak men are so annoying. Why get families involved, plan a wedding and hurt people's feelings. Things like this lead to potentially long lasting issues. May Allah soothe the sister's heart, bless her with a real man of taqwa and guide the brother.

    • @yasinfazley8313
      @yasinfazley8313 3 года назад +5

      Frrrr

    • @enesje61
      @enesje61 3 года назад +17

      How would we know if she is curvy if woman are not allowed to dress with tight clothing?

    • @shankaroont4959
      @shankaroont4959 3 года назад +1

      Amiin

    • @aatif7518
      @aatif7518 3 года назад +15

      Well, attraction is important and the bro should have checked it before marrying her

    • @yasinfazley8313
      @yasinfazley8313 3 года назад +7

      This is why Allah has ordained modest clothing for women and men, and it's the reason why modesty is emphasized more on women islamically, e.g hijab.

  • @zoomermcboomer4771
    @zoomermcboomer4771 3 года назад +123

    This is most likely because of the desensitisation of naked women online and everywhere. It warps our expectations and makes us expect more than what is possible. When all the top photoshopped models are displayed everywhere it conditions our minds to believe unrealistic things.

    • @aliay2743
      @aliay2743 3 года назад +3

      yes indeed

    • @beachboy_boobybuilder
      @beachboy_boobybuilder 2 года назад

      Zoomer - totally wrong. The inherent problem is not the men, but the women. They have been brain washed by western feminism.

    • @abadran8174
      @abadran8174 Год назад

      This is less true than we think. We just keep saying it all the time, so much so that "it must be true"
      The real reason is that man is polygamous and when you force man to be monogamous, his brain will reject the one wife. It will see her ugly and unfit to receive his DNA. Onve polygamy is made available, man sees his first wife beautiful again. The brain rejects the first wife because it is designed like that, to spread the seed. So it will do everything to you to push you away from that woman, ED included. You'd be hard and get soft at the sight of her. We just followed the west and were tamed and domisticated as their cattle.

  • @deedeee6271
    @deedeee6271 3 года назад +127

    Don't know if a man needs to read this, but women are like, people, who have feelings, emotions, ambitions, hopes and dreams, just like you do. Perhaps if you saw them like this, this behavior would cease. Wow.

    • @xy5853
      @xy5853 3 года назад +13

      @Daniel J. Gonstaz you dont get the point… she means that some men treat women as if they were sex objects and that all no more no less… but she implies that women are people too…

    • @Ahmededits98
      @Ahmededits98 3 года назад +4

      yeah of course they are but people could still have personal preferences men or women can love certain body types or specific facial structures men usually like curves in women and women usually like men with hair more than balding men there are women who are disgusted not just dislike DISGUSTED of manboobs but in long term marriage men and women should be more accepting of the other in term of looks because women will gain weight after pregnancies and men will lose their muscle and hair with age it's ok to marry someone base on your own personal preferences but it's important to learn to accept what heir body might change to, of course in the health limit.

    • @beachboy_boobybuilder
      @beachboy_boobybuilder 2 года назад +8

      deedee - please stop using typical feminist shaming tactics. The brother is not incorrect. There is nothing wrong with having a sensible standard. It is a very sad fact that muslim men are always forced to marry down, whilst muslim women always marry up. It is an extremely bad deal for the man.

    • @abadran8174
      @abadran8174 Год назад +1

      @@beachboy_boobybuilder normally, he would keep her, marry another woman, and love both. And actually love the variety. But we're good little domestic cattle.

    • @abadran8174
      @abadran8174 Год назад

      Muslim feminist is the most deformed creature that ever existed on God's earth, wallahi!

  • @springleaves4958
    @springleaves4958 3 года назад +166

    Marriage is about compatibility. All the curves or muscles won't keep a marriage going. Anyone who goes for the first fluttering feeling won't last. The looks will fade on both men and women. You see supermodels being cheated on, you hear of macho good looking men being cheated on too. Looks should not be the first thing, especially if you have been brain washed by media. Everyone needs to calm down and reprogram their minds. Yes, you will need to look but not go over board because of what you see on the street. Marry because you are more compatible in character, in deen and you have attraction. But please turn off the tv, social media and stop looking at fake people. Start taking your role of being a man or a women seriously. We have responsibility and accountability.

    • @hayadait-naceur6710
      @hayadait-naceur6710 3 года назад +12

      I totally agree with you.

    • @m0hamed_kamz70
      @m0hamed_kamz70 3 года назад +7

      Masha Allah very well said.

    • @aatif7518
      @aatif7518 3 года назад +3

      Attraction is important
      And Deen doesn't bring the attraction men require

    • @springleaves4958
      @springleaves4958 3 года назад +12

      @@aatif7518 what are you looking for? Supermodel? You clearly don't understand. I understand men and women need attraction. But it's not the saviour or lasting thing in a marriage. Its character that last with deen. You think your supermodel wife with no deen will understand your manly needs? She will be looking at your bank balance.

    • @aatif7518
      @aatif7518 3 года назад +1

      @@springleaves4958 did i say attraction is the most important?
      Did you watch the video?
      Deen is the first thing and THEN COMES BEAUTY and nothing wrong with these expectations as said in the video

  • @bintsoftness9511
    @bintsoftness9511 3 года назад +28

    No one says that having preference is haram. But acting like a childlish "man", is really disgusting. If he likes curvy women, he should make sure to look for curvy women and marry them, instead of marrying that poor girl and divorcing her after one week. Its silly and not mature!

  • @curiousmind8510
    @curiousmind8510 3 года назад +74

    Women get more curvy with pregnancies, after giving birth. Young virgin girls are often thin, that's normal. Women's bodies change with time. Some women gain weight if she takes birth control pills.
    And secondly, people adapt to each other's body with time, and start loving each other's bodies no matter what.
    This guy doesn't have patience, good character. He didn't deserve this young lady.

    • @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200
      @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 3 года назад +10

      I think birth control pills is Haram cause there is evidence that shows it reduces estrogen of women and increases chance of depression.. I'm not a scientist lol but I heard about that

    • @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200
      @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 3 года назад +1

      I'm not declaring anything btw lol. Just my opinion

    • @esthellakomerl8084
      @esthellakomerl8084 3 года назад

      So true.

    • @R14iify
      @R14iify 3 года назад +3

      @@malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 excess estrogen is converted to testosterone in a woman causing virilization. It's very common in women with PCOS and the birth control would actually help control their weight. It might cause growth of breast tissue but would still most likely decrease their overall body weight. As for the psychiatric effects, nothing has been established but I have heard numerous anecdotes about mood swings.

    • @AC-mp7cx
      @AC-mp7cx 3 года назад

      women do this to men too

  • @slike601
    @slike601 3 года назад +48

    The Thing is that nobody really talks about these topics like you do.
    Even if there are people, they don't talk that openly about it. I really appreciate the fact about this.
    By the way 🤣 4:35
    yes, absolute true words🙌👌

  • @srashid8073
    @srashid8073 3 года назад +49

    This did not answer the question at all. It was the girl asking you for advice but it sounded like you only explained why the man should have fully examined her body before deciding to marry her. Everyone has a preference and an ideal but that is not reality.
    The reality is no one is perfect and attraction is not about perfection but rather beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Therefore, if he thought he was attracted to her before marrying her then he already made that choice. She is not a product whose packaging he opened and decided to return it because he was not happy with what he saw once he brought it home.

    • @esthellakomerl8084
      @esthellakomerl8084 3 года назад +5

      Well said..

    • @shahee6579
      @shahee6579 3 года назад +1

      Yeah I'm left more confused

    • @bloominggarden906
      @bloominggarden906 3 года назад +1

      Well I think it's obvious if a girls is thin or curvy... Also it's helpful if his mom or girl relative sees her without the covering, to have a look at her appearance because thet probably know what his preference his

    • @trajictempr8574
      @trajictempr8574 3 года назад +8

      Exactly she was asking how to cope not what a man wants🤦🤦

    • @Muslimah393
      @Muslimah393 2 года назад +5

      Exactly. I pray the sister has recovered and Allah grants her someone more suitable and more compassionate. Ameen
      The answer here sound to justify the man’s action rather than comforting the girl as she was clearly crying for help.
      InshaAllah she’s recovered and is doing well.

  • @islamo9200
    @islamo9200 3 года назад +64

    I hope someday this mean bad man find that "Curvy" mean woman, break his heart and make him suffer, exactly like what he did to his ex wife by breaking her heart, taking her virginity, throwing her like a trash, and destroying her life ! Divorce for a woman is very very shame, it is very horrible in our society and only women suffer! May God help her and give her a better husband.
    حسبنا الله ونعم الوكيل.

    • @qasis42
      @qasis42 3 года назад +9

      Yes he's not a real man

    • @AC-mp7cx
      @AC-mp7cx 3 года назад +2

      women look for height and big something else too

    • @suma6881
      @suma6881 3 года назад +6

      @@AC-mp7cx not all women bro

    • @AC-mp7cx
      @AC-mp7cx 3 года назад

      @@suma6881 most. in the west, most.

    • @sh-tz2xs
      @sh-tz2xs 2 года назад

      @Der selektive Mutist hey incel i see u commenting this everywhere , if you're not a man enough to take marriage seriously in islam tgen don't get married because u shouldn't just get married and divorce " whenever u like " as u claim it is not a game

  • @yousoufessa2438
    @yousoufessa2438 3 года назад +57

    But don't forget how pornography ruined preferences and put unachievable standards and shifted the beauty from the face to the body and that is the problem of both sides as men we should look away and as sisters you should look away and wear the right clothes and above all we should all avoid mixing
    ٣٠ قُلْ لِلْمُؤْمِنِينَ يَغُضُّوا مِنْ أَبْصَارِهِمْ وَيَحْفَظُوا فُرُوجَهُمْ ۚ ذَٰلِكَ أَزْكَىٰ لَهُمْ ۗ إِنَّ اللَّهَ خَبِيرٌ بِمَا يَصْنَعُونَ30 Tell the believing men to restrain their looks, and to guard their privates. That is purer for them. God is cognizant of what they do.
    ٣١ وَقُلْ لِلْمُؤْمِنَاتِ يَغْضُضْنَ مِنْ أَبْصَارِهِنَّ وَيَحْفَظْنَ فُرُوجَهُنَّ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا مَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا ۖ وَلْيَضْرِبْنَ بِخُمُرِهِنَّ عَلَىٰ جُيُوبِهِنَّ ۖ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا لِبُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ آبَائِهِنَّ أَوْ آبَاءِ بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ أَبْنَائِهِنَّ أَوْ أَبْنَاءِ بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ إِخْوَانِهِنَّ أَوْ بَنِي إِخْوَانِهِنَّ أَوْ بَنِي أَخَوَاتِهِنَّ أَوْ نِسَائِهِنَّ أَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُهُنَّ أَوِ التَّابِعِينَ غَيْرِ أُولِي الْإِرْبَةِ مِنَ الرِّجَالِ أَوِ الطِّفْلِ الَّذِينَ لَمْ يَظْهَرُوا عَلَىٰ عَوْرَاتِ النِّسَاءِ ۖ وَلَا يَضْرِبْنَ بِأَرْجُلِهِنَّ لِيُعْلَمَ مَا يُخْفِينَ مِنْ زِينَتِهِنَّ ۚ وَتُوبُوا إِلَى اللَّهِ جَمِيعًا أَيُّهَ الْمُؤْمِنُونَ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ31 And tell the believing women to restrain their looks, and to guard their privates, and not display their beauty except what is apparent thereof, and to draw their coverings over their breasts, and not expose their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their husbands' fathers, their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers, their brothers' sons, their sisters' sons, their women, what their right hands possess, their male attendants who have no sexual desires, or children who are not yet aware of the nakedness of women. And they should not strike their feet to draw attention to their hidden beauty. And repent to God, all of you believers, so that you may succeed.

    • @aatif7518
      @aatif7518 3 года назад +3

      Body also includes beauty
      Face is not only beauty
      Shape must be good

    • @shamsafadumo6321
      @shamsafadumo6321 3 года назад +2

      Mashallah

    • @thatpakiguy3445
      @thatpakiguy3445 2 года назад +1

      Yes akhi pornography is a big problem... and not just pornography but the fact that we see all these naked girls walking around in public in the streets, also messes up our minds

  • @kipom3529
    @kipom3529 3 года назад +7

    He just played the girl. You can tell a woman is curvy enough for your liking through her Islamic dress

  • @emiliakova2056
    @emiliakova2056 3 года назад +52

    I am shocked and upset so much because of this story! So the guy was attracted enought to have intimacy with her (if he wasnt he would not be able to, let's be honest!). What is gonna be if the guy's wife is very beautiful and 100% fits with his expectations, but then she got pregnant, gave a birth to his baby in suffer and pain. And after that her body has changed in a bad way? He is gonna leave her too? Really scary story

    • @muhammadmafaz8530
      @muhammadmafaz8530 3 года назад +1

      It's like this if chemistry worked in the beginning his mind will be fixed with her for long run. But if beginning if beginning is incorrect then it will be hard to fix. I'm telling with my proposal experience.

    • @esthellakomerl8084
      @esthellakomerl8084 3 года назад +6

      @@muhammadmafaz8530, then do the decent thing and don't get married untill there is chemistry bw you and your potential spouse.. But when married, then be responsible and honour your wife. This concept that there has to be chemistry from the beginning is not true.. Relationships can be built on.

    • @AC-mp7cx
      @AC-mp7cx 3 года назад

      this happens to men too

    • @_4zad
      @_4zad 3 года назад +1

      Well, we don't know if they were intimate. Maybe he just saw her and said no but regardless people need to make sure they aren't just getting into marriage without checking both physical and mental compatibility, I agree.

    • @shadowstorm5261
      @shadowstorm5261 2 года назад +2

      @@esthellakomerl8084 dating is not allowed in Islam. you will know if you are compatible when you meet each other for the interview and ask the right questions before you get married

  • @MAbuRowais
    @MAbuRowais 3 года назад +12

    If a man saw his wife before marriage and maybe asked his sisters to look up certain details he couldn’t like scent of mouth or body, general shape of the body and so on, it’s unlikely he would divorce her because of too less curves. For me it’s not even a reason as long as she has character which compensate. The character in the is something which lasts generally longer and hopefully until death when it’s good of course. But curves and looks will change and the man will get used to.

  • @MBounceLikeTigger
    @MBounceLikeTigger 3 года назад +26

    Most of these problems have started because we left the sunnah. If women covered, men wouldn’t know that women can look like this, this, or that. They would be happy with their wives. No temptation. I know people who live in villages with no internet and all the women are covered and the men who have even very ugly wives by our standards are so incredibly attracted to and love their wife.

    • @venusiangirl
      @venusiangirl 3 года назад +7

      Men watch PORN!!!! Are you serious??????? Men want their wives to look like pornstars but that will never happen, men are also supposed to be honest, cover their eyes... stop blaming women ffs.

    • @venusiangirl
      @venusiangirl 3 года назад +3

      @Mynameis Mine read again the previous comment of the man above, he is literally accusing women and we all know that it’s the m*an’s fault when they are the one’s who are addicted to po*rn. You m*en should seriously educate yourself and go to therapy and heal yourself and stop blaming women.

    • @venusiangirl
      @venusiangirl 3 года назад +5

      @Mynameis Mine those are not muslim women, aren’t they all literally western women????? That all of you men watch???

    • @venusiangirl
      @venusiangirl 3 года назад +1

      @Mynameis Mine dude you are being defensive with me for no reason. He’s literally blaming women and he had the audacity to write that even ugly women are married because they live in a place where there is no connection, sure let’s talk about those men abusing women and raping them and the kids too. If you don’t know religion very well do not bother with me at all.

    • @ahmedelmehdi8992
      @ahmedelmehdi8992 3 года назад +4

      She's not wrong. Men are supposed to avoid p*rnography and looking at scantily clad women in public, because it increases their lust and reduces s*xual sensitivity.
      This will ultimately lead to a man needing unrealistic amounts of stimulation to be able to org*sm in the presence of his wife. Lower your gaze. It's not the fault of the woman
      if the man is seeking out an unrealistic standard on men, sure, she should be exercising, eating well and communicating with her husband regarding what he wants, and this goes both ways, but it's ultimately all about lowering your gaze.

  • @trajictempr8574
    @trajictempr8574 3 года назад +10

    Brother I'm pretty sure you didn't answer her question properly, she basically asked how to cope after this divorce and to give some advice yet you continued to blabber around about a man's preference, true and man and woman can have their preferences. But rlly?? How did that man not know before, he just used her and divorced her in a week??? Now that's not a man, what disgusting and file person he is. You should've addressed this fact too. Besides from that I agree.

  • @onlyallahisworthyofworship5599
    @onlyallahisworthyofworship5599 3 года назад +26

    Maybe it wasn't the main reason but the brother wanted to avoid hurting her. It doesn't sound like it was truly the main reason if he saw her already. But the way to avoid such a scenario is to get your female relatives to see her in her normal clothes at home.

    • @Zazezoo
      @Zazezoo 3 года назад +14

      Very shallow man!
      An imam said a sister was divorced after 2 days! How humiliating!
      A man doesn’t need curves or beauty to be satisfied. This is the shayateen messing with us Muslims and we are falling for it. That’s why men must lower their gaze and prevent this ridiculous expectations.
      May Allah guide us all, ameen!

    • @aatif7518
      @aatif7518 3 года назад +11

      @@Zazezoo men do need beauty to be satisfied
      And it's okay to have expectations!
      See the video
      Attraction is important

    • @HeyShades
      @HeyShades 3 года назад +5

      @@aatif7518 Facts, there is no way I'm marrying an ironing board

    • @aatif7518
      @aatif7518 3 года назад +1

      @@Zazezoo beauty is important

    • @aatif7518
      @aatif7518 3 года назад +7

      @@HeyShades 💀 Ya Allah 😂🤣
      But don't have high expectations too brother
      Middle ground is the best

  • @faiyadh9558
    @faiyadh9558 2 года назад +7

    Well, one thing is pretty clear by this, Looks DO matter! so before one marries based on compatibility, family, peer pressure, and most of future potentials and compromise be open about your visual interests, no matter how shallow it seems. I would rather agree if a man (or a woman) who tells me shallow things like height, curves, hair, smile, baldness, and weight than a couple trying to suppress those things to complement the feminist and modern culture and be mature. Well, there you have it, psychological harm. And THAT is why Islam allows those visual reasons.

  • @arsfra
    @arsfra 3 года назад +17

    once me and my wife got married, we immediately go to train our bodies and Alhamdulillah we have decent shape.

    • @ColonelFluffles
      @ColonelFluffles 3 года назад +5

      @Rain No love is about shape. It's biological. It's not everything, of course not. But it is a lot. You just cannot fall in love with someone if the person is physically unattractive. You just can't unless you're the exception.
      And old age is a bad example because you've already developed a strong bond and love between each other by then through physical attractiveness at a young age. And you care less about looks when you're older.

    • @blumacaw9399
      @blumacaw9399 2 года назад

      Aww that is so cute

  • @dawuda1986
    @dawuda1986 3 года назад +5

    This is shameful, this why non Muslims think we women have no worth in Islam. May Allah guild this brother. He took her gift that she can only once ( if she was a virgin) . I’m sorry for her. What if she had gotten pregnant, this is a horrible thing for a Muslim man to done. A black mark on marriage and Islam. So so sad.

  • @muhammadmafaz8530
    @muhammadmafaz8530 3 года назад +6

    This happened to me brother but my wife refused to divorce me and I try to be a good husband for her. I'm very hardly trying to fix my mind. Even try to find a 2nd wife it's hard to find and propose also financially difficult. I'm in a great suffer. But I believe this is great test for me from almighty. He expects me to handle this issue islamically. There are lots of brothers like me but they don't express.

    • @beachboy_boobybuilder
      @beachboy_boobybuilder 2 года назад

      I feel for you brother. My younger brother is very handsome but he was forced into islamic arrange marriage with a pakistani woman who is obese, unattractive, looks 20 years older than she actually is and also has a very bad attitude.

    • @beachboy_boobybuilder
      @beachboy_boobybuilder 2 года назад

      Brother, this is why marriage for 99% of muslim men is a really bad deal. Muslim men are always forced to accept mediocrity and marry down, whilst muslim women make zero effort to improve themselves and they always marry up. This is why I refuse to marry. I am much happier being a bachelor.

  • @OddlySatisfyingPets
    @OddlySatisfyingPets 3 года назад +16

    In sha Allah I am going to do my homework for sure.

  • @larcm3
    @larcm3 2 года назад +9

    Curvey women become fat women after pregnancy which is not good. So it's best to marry a slim woman. After pregnancy a slim woman will become the right amount of curvy

  • @asmaas.8539
    @asmaas.8539 3 года назад +15

    So if I am not attracted to my husband, I can Divorce him?

    • @Blaze72sH
      @Blaze72sH 2 года назад +1

      YESS

    • @shadowstorm5261
      @shadowstorm5261 2 года назад +2

      @@Blaze72sH no

    • @Blaze72sH
      @Blaze72sH 2 года назад

      @@shadowstorm5261 It was sarcastic that's why I put it in capital.

    • @ChiqueIndustries
      @ChiqueIndustries Месяц назад

      @@Blaze72sHno don’t spread lies, women can’t divorce but they can ask for a divorce for this reason. Women have rights.

  • @sayrarazaq4791
    @sayrarazaq4791 3 года назад +2

    On a serious note
    Absolutely amazing talk
    Eye opener

  • @farahzobair4918
    @farahzobair4918 3 года назад +1

    We cannot judge completely. If one feels they have made a mistake it is better to divorce quickly than later when kids are involved and many years of marriage have passed.

  • @a5amr2
    @a5amr2 2 года назад +3

    Women look very different in hijab and make up. That's why it's a must for a man to see the woman within guidelines before marriage. In fact some women are unrecognisable without make up. Young men will fall for this trap. You need to see woman when she wakes up otherwise you are in for a shock.

  • @yousseifismaeal1858
    @yousseifismaeal1858 3 года назад +2

    Amazing Islamic Guidance for the Ummah, Thank you, brother Gabriel, may Allah bless you with Jannat El-Firduas in the hereafter!

  • @fatik870
    @fatik870 3 года назад +16

    Disappointed in this answer, his answer basically defended the man based on the man not stating his preferences. Brother Gabriel didn’t answer the female’s question. Please do better!! Women are coming to you for advice.

    • @Flying_Ram3715
      @Flying_Ram3715 3 года назад +6

      I agree with you, he is rather a biased adviser.

    • @turkihazem
      @turkihazem 2 года назад +3

      There is nothing he can do they already divorced he is talking about it in public for people to avoid this instead of blaming and complaining

    • @shadowstorm5261
      @shadowstorm5261 2 года назад +5

      he didn't. maybe it's because you're a woman you understood it differently.
      from my point of view as a man, he basically called him an idiot for going through marriage when he didn't like the way she looked. he isn't biased at all.
      then he tried telling the men to look in the future when choosing a spouse before destroying a marriage like this.
      Though I do agree he didn't really answer the question in this video. He must have forgotten. I don't blame him, he goes through so many cases like this every day and it must be affecting him.
      He probably advised her directly on how to let go before or after the video was made.

  • @mariebarbee7491
    @mariebarbee7491 3 года назад +5

    He got married for the wrong reasons!!!!!!

  • @salamkala14
    @salamkala14 3 года назад +6

    Ooof what turn off disgusting 🤮 no akhlaaq in this men they literally get in my dms saying they like black women for their bodies and all gross men would be a lot happier if he controls his eyes he would be able to control his heart or you suffer

  • @Caramelhime28
    @Caramelhime28 Год назад +3

    He should have gone for an African girl then

  • @m.a1153
    @m.a1153 3 года назад +5

    This Akhi is good- Ma'shala TabarakhAllah.
    Assiat me with Nikah, bi'ithnilah

  • @muslimah3006
    @muslimah3006 2 года назад +1

    Exactly!! It is very important to be attracted too but do not go overboard with it. With these unrealistic standards of beauty, if you prioritize looks, you will one day be dissapointed as time goes because looks fade away with age, body changes with pregnancies. Sure you can try to maintain your shape and looks through different ways but its never the same. You'll always find a better looking person outside. Try to not commit and ruin the lives of people because you give too much importance to beauty.
    Attraction is as important as Compatibility. But prefer Compatibility as long as he/she is good looking (in your opinion) dont go out there with unrealistic expectations.

  • @Iamgone1961
    @Iamgone1961 Год назад +1

    What about the changes that childbearing brings, and slender woman can blossom after having children, in my opinion this is this man’s loss. Whoever this girl is, I hope you have found a good man who loves you irrespective

  • @BeeSee05
    @BeeSee05 3 года назад +15

    If I remember correctly, there's a scholarly opinion that a woman can appear before her suitor without her hijab, and wearing the clothes she normally wears at home.
    This might help to prevent these situations in the future... Innocent sisters being taken for a ride, having their emotions played with, used sexually even though he's not attracted to her, and then divorced.

  • @mohanadhmd
    @mohanadhmd 3 года назад +3

    Said some good information. But, brother, you didn't answer her question. The sister was looking for closure and perhaps a means to not fall into the same mistake. None of that was talked about in the video

  • @navedian739
    @navedian739 2 года назад

    Super topic Merciii 👌🏻very rare shsikhs, imams or female dae'yas talk of this, this is NOT the time to be shy, it's ok to talk it out loud so🤣jazakallah my convert akhy

  • @anasibndawood6696
    @anasibndawood6696 3 года назад +3

    Beautiful. I agree

  • @MSBJ7
    @MSBJ7 4 месяца назад +1

    This is very scary for females, that a man could just use you like that in nikah and then leave you a week later, especially if you have not prior sexual intimacy. This is shocking disheartening and just plain wrong! May be its a good idea for a female and her wali to let the guy see the female in her everyday clothes (all cover of course) so that they both can make sure there is attraction. I am sorry this happened to this sister.

  • @1saadx
    @1saadx 4 месяца назад

    On the flip side, you have women seeking divorce once the salary of their husband goes down or when he's lost a job for an extended period of time.

  • @autumn4838
    @autumn4838 3 года назад +6

    At least he is speaking the truth.

    • @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200
      @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 3 года назад +3

      He is a empty lowly man.. You may be too

    • @autumn4838
      @autumn4838 3 года назад +1

      @@malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 I’m not a man, and I agree with him, at least he is not sugar coating. At first I was reluctant, coming across his videos, whatever he is saying is right. (Not specifically about this video).

    • @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200
      @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 3 года назад +6

      @@autumn4838 You agree with a man that took a daughter from her family and made a covenant with her and break it because of her body which he should have judged with knowledge before marrying her? Okay God bless personally I cant marry a woman like you I want a firm woman who will make my home Whole not a slave 😂 I am sure some men do like it though enjoy lol

    • @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200
      @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 3 года назад

      @@autumn4838 Oh I'm not talking about Jibreel lol I'm talking about the man who hes talking about

    • @autumn4838
      @autumn4838 3 года назад +2

      @@malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 I am not agreeing with that man, he shouldn’t do that at first, but we don’t know the full story. In addition,both men and women have right in Islam.

  • @bloominggarden906
    @bloominggarden906 3 года назад +9

    Without hijab part is strange.... Imagine showing yourself to every single guy who comes to see you

    • @marinaabdulaeva
      @marinaabdulaeva 3 года назад +3

      Agree 💯

    • @filastinehorra9380
      @filastinehorra9380 2 года назад +4

      Im a man and I agree. and anyway don't settle for a guy that is persisent on the "curves" lol. As long as you are beautiful and have akhlaq and are pious . Same for man, I would never settle for a woman that is persisent on "finance" . I'll look and wait for the good one even if it means I end up alone "Rather be alone than with bad company" ( which i dont believe will happen because I have faith in Allah Azzawajal's qadr and rizq) Dua'a and Sabr are KEY.

  • @Chad123-g3d
    @Chad123-g3d 3 года назад +3

    I had no idea as a muslim that you can look at a woman without her hijab at her house.That always bothered me because it seemed like a gamble

    • @angelinataherin3102
      @angelinataherin3102 3 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/hbojqx7-l98/видео.html

    • @farhiyaa4880
      @farhiyaa4880 3 года назад +5

      no you cant..Allah tells Muslim women to cover herself in prescence of a non mahram

    • @Chad123-g3d
      @Chad123-g3d 3 года назад

      @@farhiyaa4880 did you even watch the video ?! I doubt it

    • @America_1st_the.rest.r_last
      @America_1st_the.rest.r_last 2 года назад +1

      U can only when you go to sincerely vet her with family before agreeing

    • @mehmet20003
      @mehmet20003 Год назад

      Where did he say you cant look at an uncovered women? Honestly I never heard him say that

  • @esthellakomerl8084
    @esthellakomerl8084 3 года назад +9

    It saddens me that this has happened.. Why are men so shallow?? Surely, there are other factors to consider before you decide to divorce her? Like her honour and dignity.. What about the feelings of her parents?? How upsetting it is for them.. I agree with sheikh but if he did marry her, then he should have been a gentleman and honoured her - not treat her like trash.. He deserves a flirtatious curvy wife who isn't going to be faithful.

    • @shadowstorm5261
      @shadowstorm5261 2 года назад +1

      she still has her honour and dignity after divorce. he just lost his for quite a stupid reason. did he not see her before getting married?

    • @luckyyyinlove
      @luckyyyinlove Год назад +1

      Both genders care about appearance

  • @filastinehorra9380
    @filastinehorra9380 2 года назад +4

    Wanting a curvy women or a muscular man or whatever criterias you have is not the problem. The problem is abusing people. He knew that she was not curvy when they met so he shouldn't have started anything with her (Unless she catfished him with fake curves lol) or atleast he should have said that he wants a curvy women beforehand just to give a hint to the women that it is not the man for her she shouldn't settle for him. Dishonesty is what caused this failure ..what a Dishonest man
    Also this is a message for the women , coming from a man : We all want beautiful wives and you all want handsome men. It is important that you beautify yourself but not to much with makeup as to change how you really look! It can be very dangerous as these kinds of situations might also happen...Don't be a deceiver just be Honest

  • @aminagreene
    @aminagreene 3 года назад +5

    Assalamu alaikum brother, I appreciate the beneficial info in your videos and your approach, however, I feel disappointed after hearing your response to this sister. Although what you said about being attracted to the person before marrying them is important and I can not agree more, this sister was wronged, she said he saw her before Nikkah yet he divorced her after one week, and her question to you was, how does she let him go because she still loves him? I did not hear you give her any advice regarding how she can heal and move on, she is obviously dealing with pain and needs sincere advice and it may be that she deserves much better than him, and if she puts her trust in Allah and asks Him He can bless her with better. May Allah reward your efforts and guide us all to what is pleasing to Him.Ameen

    • @trajictempr8574
      @trajictempr8574 3 года назад +1

      Exactly what I said, and I as a man agree

  • @user-kd2kd1jr9s
    @user-kd2kd1jr9s 2 года назад +1

    This reason can be comparable to women divorcing their husband after being disappointed with his “size”. My point is women don’t divorce for that reason and still love their husband. There are some things that are beyond that person’s control but we’re so desensitised and shallow these days that these ridiculous reasons for divorce are occurring.

    • @aishaa.1369
      @aishaa.1369 2 года назад +1

      Right

    • @goldrays4862
      @goldrays4862 2 года назад

      It's not as comparable because, alhamdulillah most women are virgins when they get married (at least the Islamically raised, Islamically adhering) and if you've never had it, you will adapt to whatever your marriage brings (a woman's anatomy molds around a man's).
      The reason I believe most women SAY they want big ones is anxiety and fear caused by western women (who behave like unpaid prostitutes) anatomy becomes disfigured and stretched from molding around multiple men's).

    • @aishaa.1369
      @aishaa.1369 2 года назад +2

      @@goldrays4862 okay so you're saying we can adapt but you people have standards!!!!!

    • @user-kd2kd1jr9s
      @user-kd2kd1jr9s 2 года назад

      @@aishaa.1369 my guy needs to learn basic biology the vagina doesn’t become saggy mate which is basically what he’s saying 🤣 stop making excuses.

  • @kanizfatima3447
    @kanizfatima3447 Год назад

    There is nothing wrong with having a physical preference and in my case I always found to find more women being strict on certain physical standard like being a certain height and being a certain weight but it is not fair to be divorced after marriage due to looks

  • @IM-3000
    @IM-3000 Год назад

    And now our people see just "not virgin"

  • @crystaldawn8875
    @crystaldawn8875 2 года назад

    Its true attraction is important first mental energetic and physical personality..all of it is very important for both men and women! When me n my mate met i was covered in beautiful modest clothing not a stitch of fake up the connection was instant! To this day he admits he was drawn to my modesty and my character everything else was a happy suprise for us both! Breaking the medias spells is critical to having real relationships with you future mate. Still together almost 20 years. If your not attracted be honest in a respectful way phasads can hurt so deeply just dont do it!

  • @wafajamila5668
    @wafajamila5668 3 года назад +4

    Whoever marries a woman because of her external beauty, Allah will make her beauty his evil

    • @Blaze72sH
      @Blaze72sH 2 года назад +3

      Evidence?

    • @shadowstorm5261
      @shadowstorm5261 2 года назад +4

      that's not authentic. one of the qualities of things to look for in a spouse is beauty

    • @America_1st_the.rest.r_last
      @America_1st_the.rest.r_last 2 года назад

      Are you ugly or something? It's like saying if you decline to marry a guy for his job position,....... see where I'm going with this?

    • @greyralph1637
      @greyralph1637 Год назад

      Ooh triggered feminatsi

  • @nidaeshaque
    @nidaeshaque 2 года назад +3

    As much as I'm for men having certain preferences as to whom they want to marry, some of them needs to calm down with their high expectations. Do they expect every woman on earth to look like that brazilian model that they have been haram-gazing all throughout the internet while they (men) look, you know, average or below average. This is not jannah nor are the women of this dunya meant to look like hoor al ayn. You want perfect women?! Fear Allaah and try to get to jannah, you'll have plenty of perfect women there by the permission of Allaah. Not here. Here, even though certain preferences are acceptable, they need to lower their expectations. You're not going to get perfect women here. That's just how this dunya is.

    • @America_1st_the.rest.r_last
      @America_1st_the.rest.r_last 2 года назад +1

      Also in this dunya are shallow women adopting western feminist values and want a successful handsome guy. Why is the first thing they always ask what we do for a living? We don't know the full story. And he is stuck paying before and after either way. Still, he is 100% stupid for not making sure way before. But he is also 100% in the right to have a preference, especially since it only mentions "curvy" which is a very very basic request. But all these angry annoying females jump straight to assume he's asking for some unattainable unicorn model... like seriously listening to yall rationalizing and jumping to conclusions is more than enough to keep guys from choosing you. We only hear her side of the story, it's fishy from the start. No way a man can go thru all that time (because apparently it was enough time for her to love him) and not realizing what she looks like. It's pathetic how families are still forcing arranged marriage when one or both partners don't want it. Those parents will eventually have to answer on youm al qyama

  • @marryjane8849
    @marryjane8849 2 года назад

    Admiring brother Romania sabr to not call this guy what he is 😂😂😂

  • @aishaa.1369
    @aishaa.1369 2 года назад +4

    Sorry this was complete bullshit....you don't have to measure each and everything of your partner to be compatible afterwards!!! 😂

  • @the_struggler_24_7
    @the_struggler_24_7 2 года назад

    4:19 What if I have got ocd about finding attractive? I mean I am a confused guy... I am not certain about literally anything ;'3

  • @aminahbergliotrolsdorph7557
    @aminahbergliotrolsdorph7557 3 года назад +3

    سلام عليكم..
    Physical attraction is important aspect..
    In this Times of hypersexuality everywhere 🌏..
    Fluid..
    But we are Blessed with Islam Deen Al Fitrah..
    Lowering our Gaze..
    Our minds too

  • @ameerallietalks
    @ameerallietalks 2 года назад

    May Allah reward you in abundance Ameen

  • @trademarkuk7504
    @trademarkuk7504 3 года назад +11

    Women need to have a solid approach to males & quit being damsels- they too need to mention the fact what is the mans preference having in mind the world creates a superficial image of the female.....let’s not forget that sisters.
    Btw it’s lovely to see a confident attitude in a women that can discuss certain things with the wali too - regards to their preference.

    • @Mazzie2022
      @Mazzie2022 3 года назад +4

      Of course blame it on women it is all their fault after all. Women have preferences the same as men and believe me there are many many handsome and attractive men.

  • @Diamondraw4Real
    @Diamondraw4Real 3 года назад +13

    Shouldn't the husband just talaq as soon as he realizes he isn't attracted to her? We can't assume they consummated the marriage bc sometimes ppl don't right away. The prophet PBUH divorced a woman right away bc she had leprosy he didn't wait til a week had passed.

    • @ummabdullah4342
      @ummabdullah4342 3 года назад +2

      @Ammar Humayd yes sure is!first time hearing from a man,SubhanAllah!
      May Allah make everything easy for u!

    • @onlyallahisworthyofworship5599
      @onlyallahisworthyofworship5599 3 года назад +4

      @Ammar Humayd how can you agree to marry when you wasn't sure about having attraction?

    • @Diamondraw4Real
      @Diamondraw4Real 3 года назад +2

      @Ammar Humayd nobody except you two know what happened between you. So its your choice to spread an accusation. But you're the man. Not a weak woman.
      You could've divorced her immediately. Idk what else I can say. There was a sheikh years and years ago. He had a daughter who was married with his permission, but after a while she told him that her husband had married her just to beat her (then they looked into it and found out it was bc he was actually from a different sect and was hiding that fact). The sheikh was shocked and also learned a lesson and to caution others. Make Astikhara and best wishes for the future. Everyone goes through trials but we have to take control of your own life.

    • @Diamondraw4Real
      @Diamondraw4Real 3 года назад +1

      @@onlyallahisworthyofworship5599 pressure from family? Ppl have reasons but like Gabriel Romani said, attraction usually/likely won't come later. If their preferences are many different types then maybe the personality or intellectual differences is the problem not anything lacking in physical attraction.

    • @nastehamo667
      @nastehamo667 3 года назад +8

      Can you show me the hadith where prophet divorced a woman? I never heard before

  • @noonqueen
    @noonqueen Год назад

    Mashallah tabaraka Allah

  • @botladola
    @botladola 3 года назад

    Im in a situation where the woman i am considering for marriage is someone that I am attracted to. I want her to wear normal clothes so I can see her body figure properly. But whenever we meet she always wears very baggy clothes. We have good connection but I just don't find her attractive.

    • @Ahmed-ye5sd
      @Ahmed-ye5sd 3 года назад

      Maybe have a mahram to look for you. InshaAllah

    • @sweettea1193
      @sweettea1193 3 года назад

      Ask your female mahram to look for you.

    • @America_1st_the.rest.r_last
      @America_1st_the.rest.r_last 2 года назад

      She can't read your mind. Wanting is not the same as asking. And it's in your right

  • @shamsafadumo6321
    @shamsafadumo6321 3 года назад

    Salam alaikum, may allah reward you for your knowledge

  • @blackberrybubblegum6884
    @blackberrybubblegum6884 2 года назад

    6:05 lmaooo!

  • @Ninjatech1980
    @Ninjatech1980 3 года назад

    jazak Allah khair....

  • @z.a.1237
    @z.a.1237 2 года назад +1

    First of all ,he didnt Marry her out of love cos when you love a Person you see her / him beautiful. Secondly ,he could Ask to her about her appearance in general Lines ( not details of course cos It Is inappropriate and haram ). This Is what happen when heartless immature Kids want to Marry young Just cos of Lust.

    • @mehmet20003
      @mehmet20003 Год назад

      First love only comes after marriage since dating is haram, and you only really know that person after marriage.
      Also, what you are saying is completely against the sunah. You should marry young bc of lust to avoid sin. Marriying young is sunnah, and bc of lust marriage can become fard on you, so what are you talking about. Also, the reason you marry is bc of lust in the first place since you have this desire for the opposite gender if you didn't even desire the opposite gender yoi woudnt even want to get married ir is part of the fitrah.

    • @z.a.1237
      @z.a.1237 Год назад

      @@mehmet20003 Actually not ,many people Marry because they love a Person or because they are in Need of love and companionship . You can love a person in 100 percent pure way. Actually we are suggested to Marry people we love and respect. But unfortunatly for selfish immature people love equal Lust ,wich Is TOTALLY wrong. First of all ,we should love people in ALLAH SWT. No ,Lust Is not the only reason to Marry at all. This could be One of the reasons but nit the only reason to Marry ,Brother. To have someone with whom growing in the Deen Is One big reason for exemple ,as marriage Is half of the Deen. Plus you have to be a responsible man in order to Marry. Emotionally ,psychologically and financially. And you have to fear ALLAH SWT about your spouse. Otherwise ,you Better practice self control and self discipline , as It Is suggested to men Who are not ready to Marry or cant do It . This kid was not rispectful nor had fear of ALLAH SWT . He was not only not mature for marriage ,he was not mature in his Deen at all. No respect nor empathy to the girl that he treated like an object and no Fear of ALLAH SWT at all. Yes It Is Sunnah to Marry young in Age ,not selfish childish in the Mind. Infact marriage Is half of the Deen ,meaning the other half should be already complete before you Marry. Salam.

  • @yahyahaider7942
    @yahyahaider7942 3 года назад +1

    MashaAllah great message my brother

  • @hssnov
    @hssnov 3 года назад

    جزاك الله خيرا

  • @marinaabdulaeva
    @marinaabdulaeva 3 года назад

    I have questions my friend and her husban they both had good families, got to know each other as Islam teach us as usual and got married, few weeks later find out that someone did sihr to my friend, to kill him self, this guy ( husband ) Telling her that her own mother had done it, and forbidding this girl from having contact with her own sister and mother, not even letting her to go father's home (Allah knows best) Then this man lost interest in him ( Allah knows best ) they had more and more discussion day by day, sometimes the Jin was spoke instead the girl, and one day they had fight her husband slap him and she slapped him back. He kicked her out of the house, just a month after their marriage ( and Allah now's best) , alhamdulila She did not get pregnant and now they live with they own life.
    What do you think about this kind of situation?

  • @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200
    @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 3 года назад +19

    This man is a worm.. You have judgement and foresight to build your family before you chose her.. This is very infirm character lol I dont respect him

    • @jrrr5064
      @jrrr5064 3 года назад

      I have a doubt. Can I ask you?

    • @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200
      @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 3 года назад

      @@jrrr5064 Yes insha Allah but I will also reffer you to sources and don't just believe what I say without thinking and looking for yourself. But yes t'fudal akhi

    • @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200
      @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 3 года назад

      @@jrrr5064 W'ala oukhti lol

    • @jrrr5064
      @jrrr5064 3 года назад

      @@malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 Can a Muslim man divorce his wife without a valid reason? Can a Muslim woman divorce her husband without a valid reason? Is divorce makruh according to the Qur'an? Not the hadith.

    • @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200
      @malikialgeriankabyleswag4200 3 года назад

      @@jrrr5064 Are you sure you don't want Hadith? I will bring only books of the Salaf (not 'Salafis' lol, Muwatta of Malik etc). But okay I will bring evidence from the Quran for you, give me one minute sis

  • @isthi000ify
    @isthi000ify 3 года назад +2

    💯💯💯💯💯

  • @enesje61
    @enesje61 3 года назад +4

    Brother Gabriel, i still do not understand how the process goes off looking at your potential future wife. If she is dressed islamicly u wont see her curves nor any exposed body parts. I really cant understand on how we man can check a woman out halal way? because we have to lower our gaze? Can u please tell us more about this, because I know of myself for me a certain body type is important. Not as important as deen ofcourse but id like to be attracted to my wife. Tanks for your video and may Allah be pleased with u brother.

    • @sabrinacoolest
      @sabrinacoolest 3 года назад +5

      You ask your mother or sisters to ask her . And they come back to feedback to you

    • @enesje61
      @enesje61 3 года назад +1

      @@sabrinacoolest ahh yes thank i did not think off that. Thank you sister

    • @sabrinacoolest
      @sabrinacoolest 3 года назад

      @@enesje61 no problem.brother . Asalamu alaikum

    • @mafiqalbighairullah1753
      @mafiqalbighairullah1753 3 года назад +3

      If you want to marry her and you have visit her family ect. It’s allowed to look at her and some scholars said that it’s also allowed to see her face, hands, arms, feet, hair and neck (Search for the different opinions of the madhab from Imam ahmad, Shaaffi, Malik and Abu Hanifa)
      Imaam al-Nawawi said in Rawdat al-Taalibeen wa ‘Umdat al-Mufteen (7, 19-20): “When (a man) wants to marry (a woman), it is preferable (mustahabb) for him to look at her so that he will have no regrets. According to another view, it is not preferable but it is allowed. The first view is correct because of the ahaadeeth, and it is permitted to look repeatedly, with or without her permission. If it is not easy to look at her, he may send a woman to check her out and describe her to him. A woman may also look at a man if she wants to marry him, for she will like in him what he likes in her. What is permissible for him to look at is the face and hands, front and back. He should not look at anything else.”
      From al-Mugheerah ibn Shu’bah: “I proposed marriage to a woman, and the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ‘Have you seen her?’ I said, ‘No.’ He said, ‘Look at her, because it is more fitting that love and compatibility be established between you.’” According to another report: “So he did that, and he married her and mentioned that they got along.”
      (Reported by al-Daaraqutni, 3/252 (31, 32); Ibn Maajah, 1/574)

    • @aatif7518
      @aatif7518 3 года назад +4

      @@sabrinacoolest well moms and sis asking the bride, it might not be fully correct
      Some may lie, etx

  • @SayfumaniMyG
    @SayfumaniMyG Год назад

    I really dont care for the ukht.
    To be fair, I dont care for nost akhwat.
    I know good Ikhwan and just because they dont have this big d energy, akhwat wont even look at them.
    So marry someone that doenst even care hhhh
    Alhamdulillah, what goes around comes around.

  • @ballroomblue1270
    @ballroomblue1270 3 года назад +4

    Mashallah

  • @afdilemma8785
    @afdilemma8785 3 года назад +3

    by the way..you are definitely an attractive man 😅😅

  • @humee727
    @humee727 2 года назад +1

    lol halalywood 😂😂

  • @Chad123-g3d
    @Chad123-g3d 3 года назад +2

    We should motivate women to hit the gym at home that is

  • @sayrarazaq4791
    @sayrarazaq4791 3 года назад +2

    Halaalywood
    🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭