Oopsie, the correct quote for 7:37 is: His soul joined to Dinah, the daughter of Jacob, and he loved the young lady, and spoke kindly to the young lady. Shechem spoke to his father, Hamor, saying, “Get me this young lady as a wife.” Genesis 34:3-4 WEBUS Gen 1:1-4 is my placeholder text.
oh wow that surely makes this video way less gruesome :D ty though for keeping us updated, knowlige is power and power too the people! so erm.... i was just thinking *signet ring and staff? why tf would he have a signet ring? where letters with beeswax already a thing back then?* quote: *Actual examples have been found from the Indus Valley and Mesopotamia civilisations, which were active from 3300BCE and 150BCE respectively.* from the site ''stamps direct'' so i learned even more then i came for :3
@@channel_lurkerI mean it’s still entirely ambiguous, just different wording. The people writing these would not have distinguished the two, the woman’s consent would not be considered. Maybe he loves and speaks kindly to her, but we still don’t know if she loves him 🤷♀️
@@raininghail4049 wait a minute, you thought when i said *oh wow that surely makes this video way less gruesome :D* i realy meant it? i gues ill just copy paste this here then: sarcasm noun noun: sarcasm; plural noun: sarcasms the use of irony to mock or convey contempt.
I learned all of this as a kid it all registered for me but they also talked a lot about the consequences of their actions in the ones where their was actually consequences, and in the one’s where they are just bad people comparatively, it just seems like they were a product of their time.
@@creativebaby7966I learned from my mom, she’s a big Christian, and she basically reads this stuff before bed every night, and she didn’t hold back on the more mature scenes
Other way around. It was Rachel, he wanted to marry Leah. Laban gave him Rachel in the dark and then said it was customary to marry the oldest sister first.
@@AlwaysADekarangerthey wanted to make an weird innapopriate things with the 2 angels and the context is ALL the people from sodom wanted to do that weird sin
Randomly remembering the tale of three rabbis arguing about something, and eventually God himself comes down to say that the underdog was the correct one and the other two respond in unison "well its still only 2v2 so we'll call it a tie" which is just the most Jewish thing I've ever heard
There are two possibilities I could take away from this: 1-God is chill dude(despite his overkill wrath)you could hang with 2-The Israelites went overboard with making them sound Big by having God show up like once week which results in it being obvious it Bullsh\t, it’s kinda similar to when a 8 year old threatens someone on Xbox with the whole “My dad works at Microsoft” play
@@eli3998 just as much as it's the most christian, most muslim thing most x thing. why would this be specific to jewish people beyond the specific scenario including rabbis?
I grew up as a fundamentalist Christian, so none of this is new to me, but it's strange being reminded of how effed up everything is and how much it's just glossed over. We definitely never had these characters on the felt story board.....
Well considering that we believe it; for us, it's part of history. We can't kid ourselves; history as a whole isn't pretty, and not even the best of men are faultless. The Bible says we're all born in sin because of Adam and Eve's disobedience; we're all destined to end up doing at least one bad thing during our time here. It's all of a matter of accepting the hand of mercy God has extended for us.
@@videogollumer I'd ask why all of humanity is at fault for the actions of two individuals but that would soon start me agonizing over the fundamentally broken logic of theodicy.
I think this is the advantage of translating the Bible into modern day English. Everyone talks very eloquently, like an old fantasy novel where the characters are ideals so you have a harder time grasping them. Like a whole verse being translated to “ok, no one indulge this guy’s 🐤 fetish!” Is easy to grasp.
@@nouvellelune8699it depends what theology you believe, some denominations don’t belief in original sin, others belife that because the brokenness of the world because of Adam and Eve, we are born with sin, the early church fathers found answers to these questions a long time ago, most atheist don’t bother though.
As someone who grew up Orthodox Jewish, I have to praise you for your accuracy. Most of the people who discuss these stories usually get a lot of things wrong or just focus on the most outrageous aspects of it (he married his cousin at a time when it was a common custom? No way!!!!!!!!!!!) but you actually do a pretty good job focusing on the intricacies and different interpretations of what was written. You did omit a couple of things, like how God didn't even find 10 GOOD PEOPLE in Sodom & Gomorrah, or how the origin stories in Genesis are meant to establish relationships between nations, but overall you did a much better job than anyone I've seen on this site at conveying the original meaning of the texts.
@@krisaaron8180 I think the bible was specifically referring to "good men". Women and boys under 13 weren't usually counted in these types of instances.
@@nieselregen420 that's the Bible for you (although I'm sure there'll be an explanation saying they're also evil, as is common with these types of stories)
When i was a kid...i thought some of these stories were silly, hardcore or so messed up they should be pretty rare. Now as an adult and being more interested in gossip, history and news around me...these stories doesn't seem rare, strange nor uncommon to me anymore. In christian households, discretion many times shelters children against their growth and wisdom.
In christian households, the atrocities and draconian policies supposedly perpetrated by god are somehow justified by going great lengths to try and warp the moral codes of men.
More like we as a society have grown past such barbaric understandings of what is moral and just, and are understandably ashamed of what was once considered permissible behavior.
@@dIancaster Not entiretly true that "we" as a society...¿wich of many societies you are talking about? christians(MOrmons, protestants, chatolic, anglican, ortodox, evangelist, jehova's witness, etc?, LGBTQ?globalist? liberal? communist?, socialist?, fascist? anarchist? Enviromentalist? Vegan? muslim (shi, sunni, salafis, etc etc), jew (sephardic, ashkenazim, levite, etc). There is no "we" in the sense you are trying to portray.
@@dIancaster Have we, though? Grown past such barbarism? No, we haven't. The patriarchy still exists. While feminism has managed to curtail the worst excesses of misogyny, all the fundamental aspects of the patriarchy that are found in the old testament are still there, like jealousy and denouncing women for daring to have a sexuality, to name but two. Women continue to be murdered for being women every day. The Weinstein scandal (which thankfully was followed by a noteworthy protest movement that resulted in considerable improvements, at least for now) isn't even a decade old. And the patriarchy will continue to exist until its economic basis these days, capitalism*, gets abolished. *capitalism didn't give rise to the patriarchy because it obviously wasn't around then (how and why the patriarchy came to be is its own, interesting story), but today it is the underlying reason for its continued existence. This claim is supported by none other than the early Soviet Union under Lenin (1917-1924), the first serious attempt at dismantling capitalism, which saw significant improvements for women regardless of their economic background, such as the right to get divorced and to have abortions (these achievements were later reversed by Stalin, unfortunately), the possibility to enroll in university (this was thankfully not undone by Stalin, in the 50s and 60s as many as 60% women made up some university courses) and communal care for children so the mothers were relieved from childcare and could work or study. I mention this because for meaningful change, it's important to deal with the economic basis of the exclusion and discrimination of women: Feminism must be anti-capitalist and anti-capitalism must be feminist to actually have a chance of being effective beyond more or less superficial improvements.
Hey, a Hebrew speaking Jew here, and in Dinah's story, the literal translation of the word "ויענה" is "and then he tortured her" which is used multiple times in the Tanakh to describe rape.
Good to know! So, rather than "lying with her" it would mean that he subjected her to some unworthy or indecent act, which would be more in line with the moral meaning of the story: "not premarital sex, even if there is a promise of marriage in between"
@@Shadow1YazMurdering every single man in the city while they lay weak with pain, robbing all the wealth from the city and enslaving all the women and children were not necessary steps in "rescuing" one woman.
@@joshuaspaulding2978 The word is ambiguous, and doesn't indicate what precisely it refers to, if it was rape or premarital sex. In any case, it seems that the prince definitely loved her, going so far as to circumcise himself and encourage the rest of his people to achieve the marriage.
Somewhat off-topic but can I just say that I love how you depict biblical characters with the colorful clothes and flashy jewelry they would have actually worn (if they were real historical people) instead of the traditional but completely wrong white togas and austere brown-on-brown esthetic you see in bible movies.
I think the reason is because colorful clothes meant riches and the characters are more sympathetic to the audience if they are poor because of the "underdog effect" so modern interpretations depict them as such
@@keesh2736 Regardless of the existence of YHWH, upwards of at least half of the Bible is completely made up, as evidenced by about 300 years of Archaeology dedicated to proving that it is all real failing spectacularly.
You know they started with the story of Adam and Eve right? The story that shows that all humanity come from only 2 people? And they at some point got to the story of Noah, you know the story where only 6 people reformulated the earth after everyone else except the men's parents perished in a flood. Incest was not only practiced it was necessary for the continuation of the human race.
I’m a Christian, although I’ve never attended Sunday school. The whole concept is so bizarre to me, trying to make kid-friendly fairytales out of the most adult stories imaginable, with more sex and bloodshed than a Tarantino movie
So how do you make God banging Jesus mum Mary and impregnating her, then God killing that same child of his cuz people do bad things, kid-friendly? Talk about a bizarre concept. It's almost like the ENTIRE Bible is completely bizarre. Kinda like a fairy-tale, no?
Most of people still cant register fact that Christ is rainbow goat-peacock with nickname Morning Star... And that Satan and most of "demons" are actually loyal servants of the God.
@@iamsalaya since when are people “supposed” to only learn how to live a holy life as a child? Many people learn how to live a holy life after converting to Christianity as adults. It’s a parents responsibility to teach their children how to lead a good life (holy or unholy), not regular school or Sunday school. If you wouldn’t allow your kids watch a movie that’s full of sex, murder, prostitution, rape, genocide then I don’t know why you’d think it was appropriate for them to study a book full of the same things
@@iamsalaya yet again why are you “supposed” to raise your kids like that? The journey towards God is always a solo journey; The Bible and parents, priests, rabbis ect can only provide guidance for that journey. It should also be left up to the individual to decide when they’re ready to undertake that journey, forcing a child to undertake that (difficult) journey before they are ready is like forcing a kid to do any other activity before they’re ready.
I love how this messed-up parts often tries to convey some moral message as we see how the author purposedly placed a random story of Judah in Genesis 38 while describing the story of Joseph to contrast Joseph's encounter in Genesis 39.
@@matthewdonaldson2662If that mountain is filled with the corpses of bad people, or the result of a bad action that you are preaching against, then it's good.
Why do people argue over creationism vs. evolution, quoting scripture, The Ark Museum kinda stuff? I find the treatment of children and women in the Bible as proof enough for me that it was written by man. I don't need to figure out if the Earth is 2000 years old or not, to decide if the Bible is real or not. I literally can tell by how they suggest treating women and children, that there is 0% chance it's the perfect Word of God.
@@godgetti It’s not the “perfect world of God” because we made it that way (Eve and Adam ate the apple) and now we are forever sinful people. Women and children are not treated well in some cases because again there are terrible people in the world but women are still loved by God and do have great moments in the bible (like every different type of person). Also the whole evolution thing is different with every church and person (like I do believe in some form of evolution). This is a Christians prospective though so it won’t obviously coincide with your views. Hope it helps though, have a good day
@Savannah-1936 I was talking about instances in the Bible where children are treated poorly WHERE THE BIBLE SAYS THAT'S GOD'S WILL. Like the children of the Dude that saw Moses's wee wee.
@Savannah-1936 what is the Christian Perspective on Noah's son seeing Noah's wee wee, therefore those children of That Noah Son would serve the children of Noah's other sons... That is mistreatment of children, and the Bible does NOT condemn this slavery. Christian Perspective?
@@danielawesome36the warning is there to warn Christian’s that their entire world view could be shattered or the Bible in itself has lots of rape murder which is a pretty sensitive topic
As a Roman Catholic, some of these stories were told later on in our education, and we were even encouraged to dive deeper and read lesser known stories on our own.
and so what you are saying is even after hearing this insane bs, you still couldn't figure out its all made up? Cuz if I'm honest, that's worse than just not knowing.
I really like how you make videos about the bible. Unlike other youtubers, you put the references up on screen for what you're currently talking about, and you don't misinterpret things. Keep up the good work.
Hey man I love your vids and just wanted say you make amazing content and to keep it up!!! I cant wait for your next upload, usually watch them the moment they come out.
@@ct-7822 To read it at a pace that you can actually digest everything takes about a year in my experience, but of course some people skim it and go much faster.
@@ct-7822 When I was like 15 ish, I got to the gold statue part and declared myself too bored to continue, but I still consider getting that far an achievement.
It's hilarious. Religion is basically a lunch buffet, people pick and choose passages to post on Facebook but most people don't know any of the raunchy stuff.
@@One.Zero.One101 I especially loved trolling the adults in my life as a kid by reading out loud the Songs of Solomon and the crowd went "There's no *BEEEEEPIN* way!!!".🤣
@@One.Zero.One101while I was a devout Catholic what I struggled with the most was not how messed up the stories were (I already believed enough apologetics to explain that away) but in whether those stories happened at all or as exactly as described. I was not a literalist for the most part but I definitely believed in Biblical inerrancy, also I accused less devout Catholics of cherry picking from the religion when hypocritically I was doing the exact same thing in other aspects. It wasn’t until I left Christianity altogether four years ago when I decided to read the Bible in its entirety to better familiarize myself with the stories I grew up with and to know what I was never told about and treating the Bible as “mythology” has taken off most of the theological baggage I still had, the full version is definitely much more interesting than the sugarcoated version of the stories a lot of us were fed as kids.
So thousands of years ago an omnipotent being decided to get involved in the relationships of individual men and women…but since then said being has become too “busy” or something. Seems plausible…
Why do people complain about fundamentalist Christians taking the Holy Bible literally but then they turn around and make fun of Genesis fully ignoring that it's supposed to teach about sin. That's why there is sin in it. Deus Vult!
@@naeco1602 And while you're over there saying that while simultaneously saying kids should be taught about gender theory. (Idk your actual beliefs this is just my speculation)
@@wolfofthedreadliestwolves4767 how in any way is this related to the current topic? nobody is saying that bro you're fighting the voices in your head atp
Although Sarah was also Abraham's sister. His half-sister. They had the same dad. Guy married his sister. So, he wasn't actually lying when he told them that she was his sister.
I've found that most people basically know the Lot story through Sodom and his wife turning into salt. But telling them what happens next with his daughters has usually been skipped in their Sunday school educations, and they won't believe you until you pull up an actual Bible and have them read it themselves. It gets a lot of "What the...." reactions.
This is why Islam is better than Christianity. Because we do not believe a prophet ever drank a drop of wine, or committed a small sin such as borrowing money with interest, let alone a big one such as incest.
As a preacher's kid I can confirm they absolutely gloss over this kind of shit. Also, asking about it in Sunday school cause you were a little weirdo who read the whole bible will absolutely get you hauled up in front of the pastors for being "inappropriate" and "not a good example to the other children" lmao
That is absolutely the wrong response for them to have. A kid who actually reads the Bible is someone you want to put in the "advanced class"(whatever that looks like in your church)
Ikr? Saw this in my feed while working on getting rid of the worst headache. Was finally able to actually sleep and recover more. Just opened it like, "Heck yeah, finally slept enough to watch this"
As a Catholic girl who was told to read bible and I surprising happily obliged, cause I’m a book worm and a religious rabbit, I can confirm I have read all of these and I was in utterly shocked and my family was surprised that I was laughing over reading the Bible sin the genesis part lol… I never told them, I know the important part for them is only the New Testament after all
It's wired when chirstians act like prophets and great old testament figures do bad stuff like yeah... only Jesus was sinless even David killed a man to sleep with his wife so
a lot of this stuff happens again in a very slightly different way in the new testament cuz they wanted to tie in to the old testament. Not sure how you read all this and didn't think "wow, what poorly written bs!" like I did, since I actually was a book worm ever since the 3rd grade tho. I mean, out of every book I've ever read, the bible was by far the the most nonsensical and self refuting and just plain childish. The people's reactions to things that happen in the bible only fall into one of 2 camps. 1. Not a sane or even useful solution to the problem. or 2. murder. its like game of thrones if it was written by hodor.
@@SanityTV_Last_Sane_Man_Alive I actually did thought about that, plot twist tho… I never leave my religion cause I have a lot of active participation with the church’s community services, and I think about that as a way of helping people so yeah…
The Abraham Cycle is definitely one of the more WTF passages in the Bible, which is saying a lot. I'm actually a bit surprised that you didn't include the covenant of the pieces, where God tells Abram to chop of bunch of animals in half in the middle of the night, and then a furnace and a torch pass between the pieces. It feels like a scene out of a David Lynch movie. Incidentally, my personal theory about the passage is that it shows some influence of the cult of Ishtar on the Abraham cycle, because the animals involved in the ritual are associated with her cult (heifer, she goat, ram, turtledove, pigeon).
That was a fairly common way of consecrating an oath at the time, so even if it reads as weird to a modern audience, it's not necessarily "messed-up" in the same sense as the stuff in this video.
@@LincolnDWard Fair enough, but I still say that it still seems strange from a modern persepective. The part about the furnace and the torch especially make it seem fairley surreal.
As a kid I learned all of this just out of curiosity. I'll never forget the story of Sodom and Gomorrah. Any parts that had angels I was keenly excited for, and it's what later launched me into angelology; which *then,* in turn, opened my eyes to non-canonical texts for the Bible... which then turned me agnostic. Man, crazy shit.
I'm assuming you think this all happens by some cosmic coincidence? That everything came from nothing? A super natural creator makes more sense then that smh
@@wolfofthedreadliestwolves4767Right. But for some bizarre reason, your "supernatural creator" doesn't need a creator. Even if a creator existed, what's to say that it's the Abrahamic one and not the 40,000 others?
3:18 there's a cultural bit of importance missed by Lot both being at the gates to welcome visitors, and preventing the Angels from staying in the Town Square. Bear in mind, I'm not an expert on this, but to the best of my knowledge... Lot's position at the front gates, is an indication that he was an elder of the city. Someone important enough to be welcoming visitors, and essentially being a Representative Face of the city. Not a mayor, but possibly part of the ruling council. The Town Square in those days, was essentially a Public Layover spot, for travelers and traveling convoys. Supposedly safer than camping out in the wilderness, or on the Roads... where brigands, bandits, and wild animals might invade/attack. Most, if not all, towns/cities of any size had them. Because it incentivised travelers stopping in town. As well as nicer towns, seeing repeat business & possible establishing trade routes that pass through the area... Or alternatively, shifting trade routes away from cities where it would be considered unwise to stop for the night. *It's telling that Lot, **_as a representative of the city,_** is unwilling to allow visitors to spend the night in the Town Square.*
@@TheJimbles That's history. Like from actual historian type history. What a lot of people, sadly including actual ignorant Christians as well as ignorant skeptics, fail to acknowledge... Is that much of the Bible is History. To the point where similar contemporary texts are judged in relation to the Bible manuscripts. I mean, if it's myths you're talking about... there's this Atheist one... en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christ_myth_theory About how Jesus Christ never existed. Kinda similar to the idea that Israel never existed.
You're saying that staying in the town square is better then his home? He was trying to protect them, it was illegal in sedom to have guests or give charity.
@@avremelkatz6006 Where's this coming from? I'm pointing out that "Travelers" in those days, would have "Normally" have overnighted in the town Square. If they were not interested in an inn, for reasons of financial or logistical reasons. _(Tight budget, or having an actual caravan.)_ Indeed, the entire point of the Town Square was to encourage Travelers to stop for the night. It was the Cheap option... but it was also supposed to be safer than camping on the Road... or traveling at night. No bandits or wild animals like Lions to deal with. Where's this idea of legality springing from?
Thanks for putting videos like this out. I geew up reading and hearing these stories and didnt realize the full craziness until i got in college and heard perspectives like yours
As an atheist kid forced to go to Sunday school, they pulled the known atheist kids and the less intensely religious kids into another room and told us these parts as “warnings” while the other religious kids watched movies 🥲👍
@@HalalOtaku404 I was in a really religiously extermist area as a kid so I don’t think other places generally do this 😭 but to be fair we were Jehovas’ Witnesses, and they are a bit more intense (not normally to my kingdom hall’s degree though!) then normal Christians and Catholics are 🤷♀️
@@casperslays1 Only thing I can say is that religious schools can get extreme. I'm muslim and haven't been to a Madrasa but there have been reports of abuse there and im also sure they can teach unwise and wrong stuff to the Muslims so for a atheist child, it certainly would've been a nightmare
If you read the bible or ANY religious text written between 10000 bc and now, you'd realize that ALL religuous text is "intense." Fear doesn't come from passivity and chill.
The best thing is how almost nobody who went to a religious school knew any of this beforehand. I’m Jewish and went to a yeshiva where they taught us these stories, but kind of in steps. Like they taught us the less hardcore stories first (noahs mishaps, Avrahams sister-wife deal, etc) and the more R-rated stories in like 5th grade (ie Dinah and the chain of Incest). The point of these stories are to make these religious figures more human, these things aren’t right by any means but they were the “normal” of the time they happened depending on what you believe. Cutting them out puts a sugarcoating of purity on these people when they are in fact, very human and make mistakes we are supposed to learn from
There is a lot weird things going on with Jesus right now. He's really mad at the sleeping church and how they don't talk about sins (like how these stories are often told). If you remember Exodus, you would remember that people need to spread the blood of the lamb to their temples to endure God's plagues. Cause... the world is getting a black death soon. Also, isn't it so weird that Aryans/Anglos/whites are so suspiciously connected with angels by name and language? English literallly means "language of the angels." Perhaps they are the lingering results of Genesis 6.
@@justice8718 wow, didn’t even try to hide the white supremacy there bruv. And English refers to Angles (not angels), Saxons and Jutes etymologically. Not the damn angels :/
@@MrAndido "Oh muh white supremacy", literally, you are the one glorifying them with this sentence. The Nephilim are "the men of renown" for a reason. Now the devil is literally trying to genocide them and... the mermaids... for some reason. Stop being a dumb leftist, that mindset enabled the Nephilim and allowed them to corrupt all flesh on the earth with all the "diversity" in the world that remained for thousands of years and grew like a cancer. The weakest and smallest Nephilim survived the flood simply because they could get on their own arks without sinking them.
As a Christian and a Pastor's Kid, we were absolutely told these stories once we were of age and encouraged to not gloss over the uncomfortable parts of the Bible but read it on our own and read in context. So yeah, already knew all of these :)
Just a little heads up; Jacob/Israel was NOT okay with Simeon and Levi sacking Shechem. Also, Jake forgot the part where Reuben did the deed with Bilhah, mother of his half-brothers Dan and Naphtali. Reuben, Simeon, and Levi were Jacob's first three sons; and from what I can tell, these actions essentially cost them each the inheritance as the heir whose line that the Messiah would be born into, thus it ended up falling to Judah. This is my interpretation, at least; but either way, what Jake said about Judah having been on a roll was a MASSIVE understatement.
@@keesh2736 Jacob hadn't even reunited with Esau yet by that time! He wasn't okay with it because he was worried that his sons actions would incur the wrath of other Canaanite cities, possibly driving them to unite against him and his household. The Canaanites outnumbered them drastically; he was worried that they'd all get slaughtered!
The messiah wasn’t concept at the time contrary to what Christians think but it could be the explanation why judean/Jewish people are the main important ones in the Tanakh even though they are descendent of the elder son
@@chimera9818 Jesus was always there. God appeared at Abraham's tent in the guise of not 1 but 3 men (father, Son, Hol Spirit). "Rack Shack and Benny" as we'd call them because their old names are hard to remember and Veggietales was my childhood, thrown into the furnace but King Nebuchadnezzar of Babylon and there was a 4th figure that appeared and stood with them and none of them burned but did not come out with them, this 4th figure was an early appearance of Christ.
One thing about the Judah and Tamar story. I like to think about this with inheritance in mind. Er, Onan, and Shelah. Once Judah died Er would receive 2 shares of dad's stuff while Onan and Shelah would each get one share. Basically a 50/25/25 split of dad's stuff. When Er died Onan got an immediate raise from 25% to 67%. Tamar's first born sun would be considered Er's so once a son was born Onan would go from getting 67% of dad's stuff to 25%, a huge pay cut. As far as Tamar - if she had no sons to support her in her old age she would be an old crone in grinding poverty. Hence, she took matters into her own whatever and got two sons.
@@yourlittleinsomniac5369 That was the custom back them. If your brother died without any sons with his wife then you would be required to bang away with your sister in law until she gave birth to a male child, who would then be legally considered the son of the dead brother, able to inherit whatever his legal father was entitled to, as well as taking care of his mother, your sister in law. Therefore, the biological connection between Onan and Tamar's first son would be irrelevant.
I learned this in 'religion' at 5th grade. 'Religion' was a regular subject in school ( without grades though). The teacher really indulged in these kind of stories, to be found not just in abrahamitic religions - I understood the meaning of them couple of years later ;-)
@@eumim8020 are you mentally disabled how the hell is that Inflammatory? the og commenter said litterally nothing against any groups or anything offensive in anyway
I like the intro to the Extra Creditz channel: "Myths are not stories that are untrue. Rather, they are stories that don't fit neatly into the historical record, and serve as the foundation for a culture."
@@Pollicina_db you mean how Jesus “preaching” about fallowing the law of Moses (including the laws about murder & genocide & rape & slavery) and said that they were permitted till the end of humanity. 🙄
Have you done a vid about the two sets of “Ten Commandments”, which are totally different and the ones everyone recites are not the ones in the Ark of the Covenant?
As a Christian it kills me when many claiming to represent God when it comes to anything. One big one since I was a kid was burning books. Anyone that has read the Bible knows there is as much death, destruction, and other adult themed stories inside.
Well, I think it’s about the context isn’t it. Those stories about death and adult themes are not presented as good things to do. They end up being major downfalls to the characters each time.
In the fundamentalist church I went to ( in a very small town), the goal was to have a Sunday service with 100 people in attendance, whereupon we would be burning Beatles records. We never got to 100, for which I was very grateful.
@@5thMilitia Not sure which parts of the Torah you're talking about, but generally when people say statements like that, they usually make the mistake of removing the Torah from the context in which it was written.
@@loganleroy8622 You say that, but the brutality and violence is often done with intent of furthering god's will and the prosperity of his chosen people.
It should be mention that Ham "seeing his father's nakedness" is most likely an expression for having intercourse with his father's wife which makes that whole episode even more messed up.
Actually not the wife. The most common interpretation was that Ham either raped him or castrated (like with Kronos...) But the way the story tells it, it may have been literally...
@@adrianblake8876 it actually isn't. The other times the expression is used is when someone sleeps with someone else's wife ie Reuben with Jacob's concubine.
@@chowyee5049 Actually, there the verb is to discover, while here it's to see... Also the fact that Shem and Japeth go out of their way to *literally* not look, may mean it was meant literally... Added in post: Reuben's story doesn't even use THAT term, this is the only mention of "nakedness" in Genesis (that, and when Joseph calls his brothers "spies who've come to see the nakedness of the land")...
I got lucky and went to a school where thirteen and up these parts weren't hidden. The pastor, while I don't agree with everything he said, had the mentality of we had the right to know there were things we can't explain as good in our religion. I appreciate it because, as I love studying all religions and mythologies and such, I subconsciously might have judged others for the messed up parts.
Technically, tamar didnt disguise herself as prostitute, but rather judah confused her for a prostitute because of how covered up she was, she was actually rewarded for her modesty with great descendants, potentially the messiah
As someone who was raised christian and still is, reading these stories as a kid screwed me up mentally but watching this video was one of the best laughs I've had.
@@mariatrinitymya8618 Bible must be read in context of original culture and the fact that many fragments in fact were written by crazy mountain hermits. Jesus in bible was actually behaving extremely feminist and provocative (what miss in translation after society become less patriarchal). To make analogy, he would be someone associated today with LGBT marches.
Somewhere back years ago, I had read that "thumping your musket," or "chocking the chicken" was called Onanism. Apparently, that term never stuck around.
It did stick around in Japan. “オナニー” (pronounced “onani”) is their word for… um… spanking the monkey. It’s derived from a German word, which is derived from the Biblical character of Onan. And, that’s also why they call fleshlights“onaholes”.
This is great. All the questions I used to have from our ever contradicting Christian Bible(s) answered and put together very nicely. Awesome work bro! 👍🏼👍🏼
As an adult convert to Christianity (because I always had low self-esteem and a thing for feeling unreasonably guilty), I can confirm that after finally sitting down and actually thinking about all this shit (including all the shit in the NT which by no means gets a pass)-rather than relying only on highly selective in-group proselytization-I promptly left faith and regretted tf out of the last 24 years of my life. Moral of the story. Don’t make major life decisions while under the influence of emotionally charged music, manipulative rhetoric, and extremely heinous threats of eternal torture. That is all.
As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (we're not mormons anymore), I can safely say, my seminary teacher did NOT skip this part. Seriously, if you're thinking sunday school is boring, so why should I go to seminary when it's basically the same thing? Well, this is why. Seminary teachers are more likely to talk about the crazy stuff than sunday school. Seminary is like sunday school, but during the school day (or before, if you don't care about sleep) and not on sunday.
Приколы
Oopsie, the correct quote for 7:37 is:
His soul joined to Dinah, the daughter of Jacob, and he loved the young lady, and spoke kindly to the young lady. Shechem spoke to his father, Hamor, saying, “Get me this young lady as a wife.”
Genesis 34:3-4 WEBUS
Gen 1:1-4 is my placeholder text.
Good on you for correcting a mistake
@@chngdusername Are you telling me Jake Doubleyoo's last name isn't Doubleyoo?
oh wow that surely makes this video way less gruesome :D
ty though for keeping us updated, knowlige is power and power too the people!
so erm.... i was just thinking *signet ring and staff? why tf would he have a signet ring? where letters with beeswax already a thing back then?*
quote: *Actual examples have been found from the Indus Valley and Mesopotamia civilisations, which were active from 3300BCE and 150BCE respectively.*
from the site ''stamps direct''
so i learned even more then i came for :3
@@channel_lurkerI mean it’s still entirely ambiguous, just different wording. The people writing these would not have distinguished the two, the woman’s consent would not be considered. Maybe he loves and speaks kindly to her, but we still don’t know if she loves him 🤷♀️
@@raininghail4049 wait a minute, you thought when i said *oh wow that surely makes this video way less gruesome :D* i realy meant it?
i gues ill just copy paste this here then:
sarcasm
noun
noun: sarcasm; plural noun: sarcasms
the use of irony to mock or convey contempt.
As a jewish person, i can tell you we were DEFINITELY told most of this as children and just REALLY didn't register it-
Yeah, during the sodom and gomorrah I was like, "yeah, yeah, this sounds famili-wait wtf? WAIT WHAT THE FUCK?"
Teachers were never subtle with that too, I heard most of these in 4th grade for the first time 💀
I learned most of this stuff in grades Yud and Yud-Aleph
I learned all of this as a kid it all registered for me but they also talked a lot about the consequences of their actions in the ones where their was actually consequences, and in the one’s where they are just bad people comparatively, it just seems like they were a product of their time.
@@creativebaby7966I learned from my mom, she’s a big Christian, and she basically reads this stuff before bed every night, and she didn’t hold back on the more mature scenes
As a Christian kid who was forced to attend Sunday school, I can confirm most of this wasn’t told to us.
Yeah depends on your teacher some will say the footnotes some will double down cause none of god children would ever do harm or anything bad.
and as a Jewish kid in a secular elementary and middle schools in Israel we learned most of it
I tell you this: Christians usually "forget" to mention this stuff. This is coming from a Christian
@@SaltoDaKid yeah, they TOTALLY wouldn't do anything bad, right? They're Gods children after all
as someone who was a jewish kid, we were ABSOLUTELY told most of this, but i think we were too young to REALLY register what we were told.
You forgot the part where Jacob sleeps with his wife Rachel on his wedding night but gets massive post nut clarity and realises it is her sister Leah.
How can that just happen. I mean it's dark and all I guess 😂
His father in law did it. Exchanged the girls
Say what.
yea but that wasnt his fault
Other way around. It was Rachel, he wanted to marry Leah. Laban gave him Rachel in the dark and then said it was customary to marry the oldest sister first.
03:33 "The men of Sodom , surrounded the house, both young and old, all the people from every quarter." The implication is CRAZY
Context behind it?
@@AlwaysADekarangerthey wanted to make an weird innapopriate things with the 2 angels and the context is ALL the people from sodom wanted to do that weird sin
@@AlwaysADekarangerthey wanted to gangr*pe two angels, like imagine how down bad they were 😭
@@Ivory-yb3tfit specifically says the men of sodom which is interesting unless men in this case just means people generally.
@@johnmcauliffe8824 say gex
“Are you done haggling with the supreme ruler of the universe?” summarizes a lot of myths
Randomly remembering the tale of three rabbis arguing about something, and eventually God himself comes down to say that the underdog was the correct one and the other two respond in unison "well its still only 2v2 so we'll call it a tie" which is just the most Jewish thing I've ever heard
There are two possibilities I could take away from this:
1-God is chill dude(despite his overkill wrath)you could hang with
2-The Israelites went overboard with making them sound Big by having God show up like once week which results in it being obvious it Bullsh\t, it’s kinda similar to when a 8 year old threatens someone on Xbox with the whole “My dad works at Microsoft” play
@@gameover9390 its the first one god is chill but can bring down the hammer when needed
@@eli3998 just as much as it's the most christian, most muslim thing most x thing.
why would this be specific to jewish people beyond the specific scenario including rabbis?
Lot's people were known for their bargaining acumen,
I grew up as a fundamentalist Christian, so none of this is new to me, but it's strange being reminded of how effed up everything is and how much it's just glossed over. We definitely never had these characters on the felt story board.....
Well considering that we believe it; for us, it's part of history. We can't kid ourselves; history as a whole isn't pretty, and not even the best of men are faultless. The Bible says we're all born in sin because of Adam and Eve's disobedience; we're all destined to end up doing at least one bad thing during our time here. It's all of a matter of accepting the hand of mercy God has extended for us.
@@videogollumer I'd ask why all of humanity is at fault for the actions of two individuals but that would soon start me agonizing over the fundamentally broken logic of theodicy.
I think this is the advantage of translating the Bible into modern day English. Everyone talks very eloquently, like an old fantasy novel where the characters are ideals so you have a harder time grasping them. Like a whole verse being translated to “ok, no one indulge this guy’s 🐤 fetish!” Is easy to grasp.
@@nouvellelune8699it's basically like this, one of your parents get an std before having you, now you got it, and so will all your descendants
@@nouvellelune8699it depends what theology you believe, some denominations don’t belief in original sin, others belife that because the brokenness of the world because of Adam and Eve, we are born with sin, the early church fathers found answers to these questions a long time ago, most atheist don’t bother though.
As someone who grew up Orthodox Jewish, I have to praise you for your accuracy. Most of the people who discuss these stories usually get a lot of things wrong or just focus on the most outrageous aspects of it (he married his cousin at a time when it was a common custom? No way!!!!!!!!!!!) but you actually do a pretty good job focusing on the intricacies and different interpretations of what was written. You did omit a couple of things, like how God didn't even find 10 GOOD PEOPLE in Sodom & Gomorrah, or how the origin stories in Genesis are meant to establish relationships between nations, but overall you did a much better job than anyone I've seen on this site at conveying the original meaning of the texts.
The lack of even 10 good people always bothered me too. Did that mean all the children were evil too?
@@krisaaron8180 I think the bible was specifically referring to "good men". Women and boys under 13 weren't usually counted in these types of instances.
well the town was gae, so they probably didn't even have children@@krisaaron8180
@@YehudiNimol But they were still smitten. Talk about collective punishment
@@nieselregen420 that's the Bible for you (although I'm sure there'll be an explanation saying they're also evil, as is common with these types of stories)
When i was a kid...i thought some of these stories were silly, hardcore or so messed up they should be pretty rare. Now as an adult and being more interested in gossip, history and news around me...these stories doesn't seem rare, strange nor uncommon to me anymore. In christian households, discretion many times shelters children against their growth and wisdom.
In christian communities, discretion many times shelters perpetrators against persecution (that one was too obvious to let it pass).
In christian households, the atrocities and draconian policies supposedly perpetrated by god are somehow justified by going great lengths to try and warp the moral codes of men.
More like we as a society have grown past such barbaric understandings of what is moral and just, and are understandably ashamed of what was once considered permissible behavior.
@@dIancaster Not entiretly true that "we" as a society...¿wich of many societies you are talking about? christians(MOrmons, protestants, chatolic, anglican, ortodox, evangelist, jehova's witness, etc?, LGBTQ?globalist? liberal? communist?, socialist?, fascist? anarchist? Enviromentalist? Vegan? muslim (shi, sunni, salafis, etc etc), jew (sephardic, ashkenazim, levite, etc). There is no "we" in the sense you are trying to portray.
@@dIancaster Have we, though? Grown past such barbarism? No, we haven't. The patriarchy still exists. While feminism has managed to curtail the worst excesses of misogyny, all the fundamental aspects of the patriarchy that are found in the old testament are still there, like jealousy and denouncing women for daring to have a sexuality, to name but two. Women continue to be murdered for being women every day. The Weinstein scandal (which thankfully was followed by a noteworthy protest movement that resulted in considerable improvements, at least for now) isn't even a decade old. And the patriarchy will continue to exist until its economic basis these days, capitalism*, gets abolished.
*capitalism didn't give rise to the patriarchy because it obviously wasn't around then (how and why the patriarchy came to be is its own, interesting story), but today it is the underlying reason for its continued existence. This claim is supported by none other than the early Soviet Union under Lenin (1917-1924), the first serious attempt at dismantling capitalism, which saw significant improvements for women regardless of their economic background, such as the right to get divorced and to have abortions (these achievements were later reversed by Stalin, unfortunately), the possibility to enroll in university (this was thankfully not undone by Stalin, in the 50s and 60s as many as 60% women made up some university courses) and communal care for children so the mothers were relieved from childcare and could work or study. I mention this because for meaningful change, it's important to deal with the economic basis of the exclusion and discrimination of women: Feminism must be anti-capitalist and anti-capitalism must be feminist to actually have a chance of being effective beyond more or less superficial improvements.
Hey, a Hebrew speaking Jew here, and in Dinah's story, the literal translation of the word "ויענה" is "and then he tortured her" which is used multiple times in the Tanakh to describe rape.
Dang… now I know it’s the “thanks for rescuing me” take.
Good to know! So, rather than "lying with her" it would mean that he subjected her to some unworthy or indecent act, which would be more in line with the moral meaning of the story: "not premarital sex, even if there is a promise of marriage in between"
@@Shadow1YazMurdering every single man in the city while they lay weak with pain, robbing all the wealth from the city and enslaving all the women and children were not necessary steps in "rescuing" one woman.
@@serafin_795I like how it’s about how bad premarital sex is bad but nothing about the rape
@@joshuaspaulding2978 The word is ambiguous, and doesn't indicate what precisely it refers to, if it was rape or premarital sex. In any case, it seems that the prince definitely loved her, going so far as to circumcise himself and encourage the rest of his people to achieve the marriage.
Somewhat off-topic but can I just say that I love how you depict biblical characters with the colorful clothes and flashy jewelry they would have actually worn (if they were real historical people) instead of the traditional but completely wrong white togas and austere brown-on-brown esthetic you see in bible movies.
Most of the world believes them to be real and who's to say they weren't
@@keesh2736they said "if"
@@keesh2736You could say that for literally any of the thousands of mythologies.
I think the reason is because colorful clothes meant riches and the characters are more sympathetic to the audience if they are poor because of the "underdog effect" so modern interpretations depict them as such
@@keesh2736 Regardless of the existence of YHWH, upwards of at least half of the Bible is completely made up, as evidenced by about 300 years of Archaeology dedicated to proving that it is all real failing spectacularly.
"Back then it was normal, isn't that something?" was the teacher's go-to with the incest.
You know they started with the story of Adam and Eve right? The story that shows that all humanity come from only 2 people? And they at some point got to the story of Noah, you know the story where only 6 people reformulated the earth after everyone else except the men's parents perished in a flood. Incest was not only practiced it was necessary for the continuation of the human race.
Sadly it was
How else were they going to populate? Lol
Incest wasn't technically a commandment until the Law of Moses, so it was totally OK then.
You got my sub right around when you claimed that "Flat bread... (is) the equivalent of Microwave nuggets". - Excellent teaching skills.
I’m a Christian, although I’ve never attended Sunday school. The whole concept is so bizarre to me, trying to make kid-friendly fairytales out of the most adult stories imaginable, with more sex and bloodshed than a Tarantino movie
So how do you make God banging Jesus mum Mary and impregnating her, then God killing that same child of his cuz people do bad things, kid-friendly? Talk about a bizarre concept. It's almost like the ENTIRE Bible is completely bizarre. Kinda like a fairy-tale, no?
Most of people still cant register fact that Christ is rainbow goat-peacock with nickname Morning Star...
And that Satan and most of "demons" are actually loyal servants of the God.
@@iamsalaya Isn't genuine answer that most of holly book was written by crazy ancient hermits?
@@iamsalaya since when are people “supposed” to only learn how to live a holy life as a child? Many people learn how to live a holy life after converting to Christianity as adults. It’s a parents responsibility to teach their children how to lead a good life (holy or unholy), not regular school or Sunday school. If you wouldn’t allow your kids watch a movie that’s full of sex, murder, prostitution, rape, genocide then I don’t know why you’d think it was appropriate for them to study a book full of the same things
@@iamsalaya yet again why are you “supposed” to raise your kids like that? The journey towards God is always a solo journey; The Bible and parents, priests, rabbis ect can only provide guidance for that journey. It should also be left up to the individual to decide when they’re ready to undertake that journey, forcing a child to undertake that (difficult) journey before they are ready is like forcing a kid to do any other activity before they’re ready.
I love how this messed-up parts often tries to convey some moral message as we see how the author purposedly placed a random story of Judah in Genesis 38 while describing the story of Joseph to contrast Joseph's encounter in Genesis 39.
What POSABLE so called “moral” message can you send from the story of the so called “righteous” lot sacrificing his virgin daughters for gang rape 😨
Preaching morality atop a mountain of corpses isn't really the way to go, but hey that's just my opinion.
@@matthewdonaldson2662If that mountain is filled with the corpses of bad people, or the result of a bad action that you are preaching against, then it's good.
@@matthewdonaldson2662 In order to confront evil, one must stare it in the face. The Bible is unflinchingly honest.
I love Bible as literature
"Are you done haggling with the supreme ruler of the universe?" 🤣🤣🤣
I remember hearing all of this as a child, and then only after reading genesis again as an adult was I a little bit horrified
Why do people argue over creationism vs. evolution, quoting scripture, The Ark Museum kinda stuff? I find the treatment of children and women in the Bible as proof enough for me that it was written by man. I don't need to figure out if the Earth is 2000 years old or not, to decide if the Bible is real or not. I literally can tell by how they suggest treating women and children, that there is 0% chance it's the perfect Word of God.
@@godgettiI always thought hey they just brought out the woman to kill. Where's the man always the woman I'll vouch. Watch for it
@@godgetti It’s not the “perfect world of God” because we made it that way (Eve and Adam ate the apple) and now we are forever sinful people. Women and children are not treated well in some cases because again there are terrible people in the world but women are still loved by God and do have great moments in the bible (like every different type of person). Also the whole evolution thing is different with every church and person (like I do believe in some form of evolution). This is a Christians prospective though so it won’t obviously coincide with your views. Hope it helps though, have a good day
@Savannah-1936 I was talking about instances in the Bible where children are treated poorly WHERE THE BIBLE SAYS THAT'S GOD'S WILL. Like the children of the Dude that saw Moses's wee wee.
@Savannah-1936 what is the Christian Perspective on Noah's son seeing Noah's wee wee, therefore those children of That Noah Son would serve the children of Noah's other sons... That is mistreatment of children, and the Bible does NOT condemn this slavery. Christian Perspective?
"And just as a warning, this video contains stuff that happens in the bible"
Funniest content warning I've ever heard
Atheist after this: 😡😡🤬🤬🤬🤬
@@jevonmagnus You seem to be misunderstanding something. Please read my comment again.
@@danielawesome36the warning is there to warn Christian’s that their entire world view could be shattered or the Bible in itself has lots of rape murder which is a pretty sensitive topic
@danielawesome36 ??? I'm an Atheist, but I'm not angry!
@@Writer_Productions_Map this is a joke😭😭😭😭😭
As a Roman Catholic, some of these stories were told later on in our education, and we were even encouraged to dive deeper and read lesser known stories on our own.
Leave that evil religion that hides and protects pedophile priest
This is so true
and so what you are saying is even after hearing this insane bs, you still couldn't figure out its all made up? Cuz if I'm honest, that's worse than just not knowing.
YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THE INBREEDING THING. Just so you know.
@@jasonh.8754 I know lmao I have common sense dw 🤣
I really like how you make videos about the bible. Unlike other youtubers, you put the references up on screen for what you're currently talking about, and you don't misinterpret things. Keep up the good work.
Hey man I love your vids and just wanted say you make amazing content and to keep it up!!! I cant wait for your next upload, usually watch them the moment they come out.
As a Christian who grow up in a Christian household I can indeed say I knew almost all of these things (I actually read my Bible)
How long did it take you to read the bible
Not the whole thing but I try to read my Bible when I can
@@ct-7822 To read it at a pace that you can actually digest everything takes about a year in my experience, but of course some people skim it and go much faster.
@@ct-7822 I affirm what LincolnDWard said.
@@ct-7822 When I was like 15 ish, I got to the gold statue part and declared myself too bored to continue, but I still consider getting that far an achievement.
as a person raised in a christian household, watching the live chat made me laugh so hard.
It's hilarious. Religion is basically a lunch buffet, people pick and choose passages to post on Facebook but most people don't know any of the raunchy stuff.
@@One.Zero.One101 I especially loved trolling the adults in my life as a kid by reading out loud the Songs of Solomon and the crowd went "There's no *BEEEEEPIN* way!!!".🤣
@@One.Zero.One101while I was a devout Catholic what I struggled with the most was not how messed up the stories were (I already believed enough apologetics to explain that away) but in whether those stories happened at all or as exactly as described. I was not a literalist for the most part but I definitely believed in Biblical inerrancy, also I accused less devout Catholics of cherry picking from the religion when hypocritically I was doing the exact same thing in other aspects.
It wasn’t until I left Christianity altogether four years ago when I decided to read the Bible in its entirety to better familiarize myself with the stories I grew up with and to know what I was never told about and treating the Bible as “mythology” has taken off most of the theological baggage I still had, the full version is definitely much more interesting than the sugarcoated version of the stories a lot of us were fed as kids.
This is a great summary and illustration. I ended up watching all of your videos. Great work, thanks.
So thousands of years ago an omnipotent being decided to get involved in the relationships of individual men and women…but since then said being has become too “busy” or something. Seems plausible…
I mean‚ current population is thousands of times higher than it was back then so maybe He just hasn't the time anymore
@@benikujaku4567but.. he is omnipotent
How do you know He isn’t now?
Why do people complain about fundamentalist Christians taking the Holy Bible literally but then they turn around and make fun of Genesis fully ignoring that it's supposed to teach about sin. That's why there is sin in it. Deus Vult!
This is giving me flashbacks of that one time I read all of Genesis when I was twelve. Thanks, Jake. Thanks for rediscovering that traumatic memory.
Oh so you haven't even read revelations yet?
Whatever you do, don’t read Leviticus and exodus
That is why a young mind should not read it because they don't have enough maturity to register those information yet.
@@naeco1602 And while you're over there saying that while simultaneously saying kids should be taught about gender theory. (Idk your actual beliefs this is just my speculation)
@@wolfofthedreadliestwolves4767 how in any way is this related to the current topic? nobody is saying that bro you're fighting the voices in your head atp
“Just as a warning, this contains stuff that happened in bible.” Is the funniest thing I’ve ever heard
"GOTH IHOP" remains one of the funniest things I've read.
@@hoilst265 I also loved "femboy hooters".
@@aidennevada243 i love working there :3
telling lies about prophets of god is no funny, the truth is in Islam, try reading these stories from Islamic books and your mind will be changed.
No@@technical5880
“Abrahamic Mythology” already know this video is gonna have infamous “Millennial Writing”
You're correct.
Although Sarah was also Abraham's sister. His half-sister. They had the same dad. Guy married his sister. So, he wasn't actually lying when he told them that she was his sister.
I've found that most people basically know the Lot story through Sodom and his wife turning into salt. But telling them what happens next with his daughters has usually been skipped in their Sunday school educations, and they won't believe you until you pull up an actual Bible and have them read it themselves. It gets a lot of "What the...." reactions.
This is why Islam is better than Christianity. Because we do not believe a prophet ever drank a drop of wine, or committed a small sin such as borrowing money with interest, let alone a big one such as incest.
To be fair, the daughters were born and grew up in Sodom so... They were just following local customs. When in Rome, do as the Romans.
@@altromonte15 Or just do the Romans, as they probably said in Sodom
I learnt everything as a little child. All the stories where told to me. But I came to understand them more as I grew up
lol ok I LOVE telling that story! The horrified looks…
As a preacher's kid I can confirm they absolutely gloss over this kind of shit. Also, asking about it in Sunday school cause you were a little weirdo who read the whole bible will absolutely get you hauled up in front of the pastors for being "inappropriate" and "not a good example to the other children" lmao
Growing up in the south in a large Southern Baptist church I was kind of the weirdo because I actually read the Bible.
I think experiences will vary based on the church and the individuals teaching the Sunday School class lol. Not all teachers are lame like that
That is absolutely the wrong response for them to have. A kid who actually reads the Bible is someone you want to put in the "advanced class"(whatever that looks like in your church)
I mean yeah speaking about murder and rape to kids isn't good for the most part
Not in my old church. The pastor would actually explain stuff if you asked, inappropriate or not
I could watch these for hours. Please make more.
Absolute, incontrovertible GENIUS! I've watched these videos many, many times over and they still crack me up every single time!
hi jake ur animations are pretty cool and i didnt even know a single thing about greek mythology until ur vids so thank you soooo much
I absolutely love comments like this!!
When you know exactly what you are going to do tomorrow morning
I don’t?
What?
Edit: Nvm, just realized this is from the night before 😭
Ikr? Saw this in my feed while working on getting rid of the worst headache. Was finally able to actually sleep and recover more.
Just opened it like, "Heck yeah, finally slept enough to watch this"
@@thegrimghoulthis was before the video premiered when a video is premiering you could comment before the video released
It’s is Saturday in America so he probably meant going to church tomarrow
My favorite part of Genesis has always been when Peter Gabriel and Phil Collins were both singing lead
This artstyle is so simple while still being cute and detailed, so nice!
As a Catholic girl who was told to read bible and I surprising happily obliged, cause I’m a book worm and a religious rabbit, I can confirm I have read all of these and I was in utterly shocked and my family was surprised that I was laughing over reading the Bible sin the genesis part lol… I never told them, I know the important part for them is only the New Testament after all
It's wired when chirstians act like prophets and great old testament figures do bad stuff like yeah... only Jesus was sinless even David killed a man to sleep with his wife so
Who doesn't laugh when the blind men ask the pharisees if they want to be disciples of Christ?
a lot of this stuff happens again in a very slightly different way in the new testament cuz they wanted to tie in to the old testament. Not sure how you read all this and didn't think "wow, what poorly written bs!" like I did, since I actually was a book worm ever since the 3rd grade tho. I mean, out of every book I've ever read, the bible was by far the the most nonsensical and self refuting and just plain childish. The people's reactions to things that happen in the bible only fall into one of 2 camps.
1. Not a sane or even useful solution to the problem.
or 2. murder.
its like game of thrones if it was written by hodor.
Reading the bible honestly made me disgusted in my religion and left it ☠️
@@SanityTV_Last_Sane_Man_Alive I actually did thought about that, plot twist tho… I never leave my religion cause I have a lot of active participation with the church’s community services, and I think about that as a way of helping people so yeah…
5:00 what r u doing step-patriarch
Totally forgot when Abraham had Ishmael.
Only to later banish him and his slave mother to the desert.
Would totally like a part 2.
The Abraham Cycle is definitely one of the more WTF passages in the Bible, which is saying a lot. I'm actually a bit surprised that you didn't include the covenant of the pieces, where God tells Abram to chop of bunch of animals in half in the middle of the night, and then a furnace and a torch pass between the pieces. It feels like a scene out of a David Lynch movie.
Incidentally, my personal theory about the passage is that it shows some influence of the cult of Ishtar on the Abraham cycle, because the animals involved in the ritual are associated with her cult (heifer, she goat, ram, turtledove, pigeon).
The covenant of the slices is in the "non messed up" recap...
@@adrianblake8876 It isn't. I doublechecked before posting the comment.
That was a fairly common way of consecrating an oath at the time, so even if it reads as weird to a modern audience, it's not necessarily "messed-up" in the same sense as the stuff in this video.
@@LincolnDWard Fair enough, but I still say that it still seems strange from a modern persepective. The part about the furnace and the torch especially make it seem fairley surreal.
The influence is likely in the reverse where the cult of Ishtar was influenced by Abraham
Do a crossover with Mythology Guy and Overly Sarcastic Productions
Yes
Yes
yes
Yes
Yes
📌Religion is basically a lunch buffet, people pick and choose passages to post on Facebook but most people don't know any of the raunchy stuff.
As a kid I learned all of this just out of curiosity. I'll never forget the story of Sodom and Gomorrah. Any parts that had angels I was keenly excited for, and it's what later launched me into angelology; which *then,* in turn, opened my eyes to non-canonical texts for the Bible... which then turned me agnostic. Man, crazy shit.
And what exactly did you find in those texts?
Whenever I come across WILD biblical stories I like to actually look them up in the bible to validate their realness
And Sodom is very real.
I'm assuming you think this all happens by some cosmic coincidence? That everything came from nothing? A super natural creator makes more sense then that smh
@@wolfofthedreadliestwolves4767, you are gatekeeping a person for checking the bible...?
@@wolfofthedreadliestwolves4767you know what they say about assuming
@@wolfofthedreadliestwolves4767Right. But for some bizarre reason, your "supernatural creator" doesn't need a creator.
Even if a creator existed, what's to say that it's the Abrahamic one and not the 40,000 others?
3:18 there's a cultural bit of importance missed by Lot both being at the gates to welcome visitors, and preventing the Angels from staying in the Town Square.
Bear in mind, I'm not an expert on this, but to the best of my knowledge...
Lot's position at the front gates, is an indication that he was an elder of the city. Someone important enough to be welcoming visitors, and essentially being a Representative Face of the city.
Not a mayor, but possibly part of the ruling council.
The Town Square in those days, was essentially a Public Layover spot, for travelers and traveling convoys. Supposedly safer than camping out in the wilderness, or on the Roads... where brigands, bandits, and wild animals might invade/attack.
Most, if not all, towns/cities of any size had them. Because it incentivised travelers stopping in town. As well as nicer towns, seeing repeat business & possible establishing trade routes that pass through the area...
Or alternatively, shifting trade routes away from cities where it would be considered unwise to stop for the night.
*It's telling that Lot, **_as a representative of the city,_** is unwilling to allow visitors to spend the night in the Town Square.*
Ah yes.... Trying to draw some wisdom from the absolute batshit insanity of these completely absurd fairytales. Good for you.
@@TheJimbles That's history. Like from actual historian type history.
What a lot of people, sadly including actual ignorant Christians as well as ignorant skeptics, fail to acknowledge...
Is that much of the Bible is History.
To the point where similar contemporary texts are judged in relation to the Bible manuscripts.
I mean, if it's myths you're talking about... there's this Atheist one...
en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christ_myth_theory
About how Jesus Christ never existed.
Kinda similar to the idea that Israel never existed.
You're saying that staying in the town square is better then his home? He was trying to protect them, it was illegal in sedom to have guests or give charity.
@@avremelkatz6006 Where's this coming from?
I'm pointing out that "Travelers" in those days, would have "Normally" have overnighted in the town Square. If they were not interested in an inn, for reasons of financial or logistical reasons. _(Tight budget, or having an actual caravan.)_
Indeed, the entire point of the Town Square was to encourage Travelers to stop for the night.
It was the Cheap option... but it was also supposed to be safer than camping on the Road... or traveling at night.
No bandits or wild animals like Lions to deal with.
Where's this idea of legality springing from?
@@Paulthored the whole reason he didn't want them in the town square,
1st time here. Loved it. You just got a new sub :) Excellent break down, with the verse on top, perfect.
Thanks for putting videos like this out. I geew up reading and hearing these stories and didnt realize the full craziness until i got in college and heard perspectives like yours
"until i got in college" And so the emotions begin to flare, and intellectualism drowns.
As an atheist kid forced to go to Sunday school, they pulled the known atheist kids and the less intensely religious kids into another room and told us these parts as “warnings” while the other religious kids watched movies 🥲👍
Im Muslim but nahhh that's just horrid and disgraceful 😭
I dont think any Sunday school would do that but I mean, I can be wrong
@@HalalOtaku404 I was in a really religiously extermist area as a kid so I don’t think other places generally do this 😭 but to be fair we were Jehovas’ Witnesses, and they are a bit more intense (not normally to my kingdom hall’s degree though!) then normal Christians and Catholics are 🤷♀️
@@casperslays1 Only thing I can say is that religious schools can get extreme. I'm muslim and haven't been to a Madrasa but there have been reports of abuse there and im also sure they can teach unwise and wrong stuff to the Muslims so for a atheist child, it certainly would've been a nightmare
@@casperslays1Well JW isn’t even Christianity, so I would encourage you to try to look at the Bible from a fresh perspective.
If you read the bible or ANY religious text written between 10000 bc and now, you'd realize that ALL religuous text is "intense." Fear doesn't come from passivity and chill.
The best thing is how almost nobody who went to a religious school knew any of this beforehand. I’m Jewish and went to a yeshiva where they taught us these stories, but kind of in steps. Like they taught us the less hardcore stories first (noahs mishaps, Avrahams sister-wife deal, etc) and the more R-rated stories in like 5th grade (ie Dinah and the chain of Incest). The point of these stories are to make these religious figures more human, these things aren’t right by any means but they were the “normal” of the time they happened depending on what you believe. Cutting them out puts a sugarcoating of purity on these people when they are in fact, very human and make mistakes we are supposed to learn from
There is a lot weird things going on with Jesus right now. He's really mad at the sleeping church and how they don't talk about sins (like how these stories are often told). If you remember Exodus, you would remember that people need to spread the blood of the lamb to their temples to endure God's plagues. Cause... the world is getting a black death soon.
Also, isn't it so weird that Aryans/Anglos/whites are so suspiciously connected with angels by name and language? English literallly means "language of the angels." Perhaps they are the lingering results of Genesis 6.
I too, was taught this in Hebrew school
@@justice8718 wow, didn’t even try to hide the white supremacy there bruv. And English refers to Angles (not angels), Saxons and Jutes etymologically. Not the damn angels :/
@@MrAndido "Oh muh white supremacy", literally, you are the one glorifying them with this sentence. The Nephilim are "the men of renown" for a reason. Now the devil is literally trying to genocide them and... the mermaids... for some reason.
Stop being a dumb leftist, that mindset enabled the Nephilim and allowed them to corrupt all flesh on the earth with all the "diversity" in the world that remained for thousands of years and grew like a cancer.
The weakest and smallest Nephilim survived the flood simply because they could get on their own arks without sinking them.
Okay, the days of Noah have returned. ruclips.net/video/ZohV4mQw4w0/видео.html
This genesis 6 world needs to burn.
8:03 I actually learned this in public school instead of church.
As a Christian and a Pastor's Kid, we were absolutely told these stories once we were of age and encouraged to not gloss over the uncomfortable parts of the Bible but read it on our own and read in context. So yeah, already knew all of these :)
Incest is incest, context be damned.
Just a little heads up; Jacob/Israel was NOT okay with Simeon and Levi sacking Shechem. Also, Jake forgot the part where Reuben did the deed with Bilhah, mother of his half-brothers Dan and Naphtali. Reuben, Simeon, and Levi were Jacob's first three sons; and from what I can tell, these actions essentially cost them each the inheritance as the heir whose line that the Messiah would be born into, thus it ended up falling to Judah. This is my interpretation, at least; but either way, what Jake said about Judah having been on a roll was a MASSIVE understatement.
He was not okay with it because they excused their genocide by saying it was for family and then selling their brother
@@keesh2736 Jacob hadn't even reunited with Esau yet by that time! He wasn't okay with it because he was worried that his sons actions would incur the wrath of other Canaanite cities, possibly driving them to unite against him and his household. The Canaanites outnumbered them drastically; he was worried that they'd all get slaughtered!
The messiah wasn’t concept at the time contrary to what Christians think but it could be the explanation why judean/Jewish people are the main important ones in the Tanakh even though they are descendent of the elder son
@@chimera9818 Don't you mean "aren't descendant"?
@@chimera9818 Jesus was always there. God appeared at Abraham's tent in the guise of not 1 but 3 men (father, Son, Hol Spirit). "Rack Shack and Benny" as we'd call them because their old names are hard to remember and Veggietales was my childhood, thrown into the furnace but King Nebuchadnezzar of Babylon and there was a 4th figure that appeared and stood with them and none of them burned but did not come out with them, this 4th figure was an early appearance of Christ.
As a Christian, I already know what he is gonna include here...
That would be awesome!
My first thought was “Noah’s gonna get drunk here isn’t he” and low and behold
My first thought was, "We're getting Dinah's and Tamar's stories, aren't we?".
One thing about the Judah and Tamar story. I like to think about this with inheritance in mind. Er, Onan, and Shelah. Once Judah died Er would receive 2 shares of dad's stuff while Onan and Shelah would each get one share. Basically a 50/25/25 split of dad's stuff. When Er died Onan got an immediate raise from 25% to 67%. Tamar's first born sun would be considered Er's so once a son was born Onan would go from getting 67% of dad's stuff to 25%, a huge pay cut. As far as Tamar - if she had no sons to support her in her old age she would be an old crone in grinding poverty. Hence, she took matters into her own whatever and got two sons.
If the son is conceived and born after she's married to Onan, then why is the child recognized as Er's in the matter of inheritance?
@@yourlittleinsomniac5369 That was the custom back them. If your brother died without any sons with his wife then you would be required to bang away with your sister in law until she gave birth to a male child, who would then be legally considered the son of the dead brother, able to inherit whatever his legal father was entitled to, as well as taking care of his mother, your sister in law. Therefore, the biological connection between Onan and Tamar's first son would be irrelevant.
I learned this in 'religion' at 5th grade. 'Religion' was a regular subject in school ( without grades though). The teacher really indulged in these kind of stories, to be found not just in abrahamitic religions - I understood the meaning of them couple of years later ;-)
I live in Israel and it is mandatory to study the Torah and it is so funny to hear you explain my material for the test
Hope Palestinians gain freedom from occupation
@@zainmudassir2964 bro wtf the commentor said nothing inflammatory why are you trying to start shit?
@@alfieingrouille1528he just want attention
@@alfieingrouille1528
>"it is mandatory to study the Torah"
>"nothing inflammatory"
I believe you're missing the whole point
@@eumim8020 are you mentally disabled how the hell is that Inflammatory? the og commenter said litterally nothing against any groups or anything offensive in anyway
The 8:50 spilled his seed on the ground visual was so hilarious 🤣
I'm agnostic but was raised Christian and this has to be the funniest but most comprehensive retelling of Bible stories I've ever heard 😂😂😂
I remember all of this from the church, they would never skip this weird parts even if there were kids 😂
i honestly canNOT comprehend how you make the most creative and diverse character designs ever like please teach me your ways
eye colors I assume
The ancient Israelites calling the Moabites and Ammonites inbred is one of those sick burns that still slaps 3000 years later
Ancient Israelites marry their first cousins that inbreeding also Araham was half brother to Sarah his wife.
@sophiawilson8696 Father and daughter is more extreme in terms of inbreeding.
I love your hilarious take on these stories!
I remember learning this stuff as a kid.
Did- no one else’s Sunday schools cover it???
Alternate title. Alabama old people with a little magic.
It's very weird to hear my belief system referred to as "mythology" but given everything I suppose it's only fair.
Mythology can mean the more supernatural or old stories part of religion and it applies to living religions too it doesn't say they are myths
Well as a christian I would bet that most of these stories never happend and honestly they don’t matter much to what Jesus was preaching about
They fit the definitionm every mythology was at some point a belief system that people based their world view around
I like the intro to the Extra Creditz channel: "Myths are not stories that are untrue. Rather, they are stories that don't fit neatly into the historical record, and serve as the foundation for a culture."
@@Pollicina_db you mean how Jesus “preaching” about fallowing the law of Moses (including the laws about murder & genocide & rape & slavery) and said that they were permitted till the end of humanity. 🙄
Have you done a vid about the two sets of “Ten Commandments”, which are totally different and the ones everyone recites are not the ones in the Ark of the Covenant?
Did I miss the part where Adam & Eve, being the first humans, bore two sons and no daughters yet both sons somehow begot children of their own?
Damn, the part with the megaphone killed me. Good job on the animations, they are amazing
As a Christian it kills me when many claiming to represent God when it comes to anything. One big one since I was a kid was burning books. Anyone that has read the Bible knows there is as much death, destruction, and other adult themed stories inside.
Well, I think it’s about the context isn’t it. Those stories about death and adult themes are not presented as good things to do. They end up being major downfalls to the characters each time.
In the fundamentalist church I went to ( in a very small town), the goal was to have a Sunday service with 100 people in attendance, whereupon we would be burning Beatles records. We never got to 100, for which I was very grateful.
@@loganleroy8622 Not really, the law of moses is terrible to
@@5thMilitia Not sure which parts of the Torah you're talking about, but generally when people say statements like that, they usually make the mistake of removing the Torah from the context in which it was written.
@@loganleroy8622
You say that, but the brutality and violence is often done with intent of furthering god's will and the prosperity of his chosen people.
I kind of feel bad for Sarah for having to put up with all of this.
Brilliant, haha love the style so I subbed, I,s like your take on The Nephilim, seriously,
6:04 It’s kind of like Pinocchio from Shrek. He got around the truth with technicalities.
It should be mention that Ham "seeing his father's nakedness" is most likely an expression for having intercourse with his father's wife which makes that whole episode even more messed up.
Actually not the wife. The most common interpretation was that Ham either raped him or castrated (like with Kronos...)
But the way the story tells it, it may have been literally...
@@adrianblake8876 it actually isn't. The other times the expression is used is when someone sleeps with someone else's wife ie Reuben with Jacob's concubine.
@@chowyee5049 Actually, there the verb is to discover, while here it's to see...
Also the fact that Shem and Japeth go out of their way to *literally* not look, may mean it was meant literally...
Added in post: Reuben's story doesn't even use THAT term, this is the only mention of "nakedness" in Genesis (that, and when Joseph calls his brothers "spies who've come to see the nakedness of the land")...
Remember this. God is three distinctive entities at once. God the Father, The Holy Spirit, and Christ. The woman represents the Holy Spirit.
@@adrianblake8876to be fair it might just be because no one (aside from ham) wants to see their dads kosher hot dog.
My new favorite channel!!
In Russian we use name "Ham" as common word in meaning of boor/cad/etc.
I got lucky and went to a school where thirteen and up these parts weren't hidden. The pastor, while I don't agree with everything he said, had the mentality of we had the right to know there were things we can't explain as good in our religion. I appreciate it because, as I love studying all religions and mythologies and such, I subconsciously might have judged others for the messed up parts.
Technically, tamar didnt disguise herself as prostitute, but rather judah confused her for a prostitute because of how covered up she was, she was actually rewarded for her modesty with great descendants, potentially the messiah
sooo, prostitutes were the MOST dressed???
@@SanityTV_Last_Sane_Man_Alivein the desert? You betcha.
@@SanityTV_Last_Sane_Man_AliveI believe they were covered to not show who they were
They could afford it and it was good advertisement. The better dressed, the most sought after.
She went and sat in the part of the road where prostitutes sat, and dressed the part in the culture of the day. She knew what she was doing.
"She's my sister!" Slap! "She's my wife" Slap! "She's my sister AND my wife" "Oh, okay, have these sheep and camels then."
"Canaantown"
The Story of Ham seeing Noah's nakedness is so much darker than what the video described.
4:45 I audibly gasped.
As someone who was raised christian and still is, reading these stories as a kid screwed me up mentally but watching this video was one of the best laughs I've had.
You're still a christian? How come?
Well, there is a reason why Lovecraft was inspired by bible...
Me too. I am a female and the bible indirectly condemn women. So I was very shocked and traumitized
@@mariatrinitymya8618 Bible must be read in context of original culture and the fact that many fragments in fact were written by crazy mountain hermits. Jesus in bible was actually behaving extremely feminist and provocative (what miss in translation after society become less patriarchal). To make analogy, he would be someone associated today with LGBT marches.
@mariatrinitymya8618
Well I urge you to do some reading and understand the historical context of those things.
Somewhere back years ago, I had read that "thumping your musket," or "chocking the chicken" was called Onanism. Apparently, that term never stuck around.
It did stick around in Japan. “オナニー” (pronounced “onani”) is their word for… um… spanking the monkey. It’s derived from a German word, which is derived from the Biblical character of Onan. And, that’s also why they call fleshlights“onaholes”.
This is actually so accurate. Great job!
accurate from Jew and Christianity perspective, take a look on Islamic perspective and i promise your mind will be changed
Great video! How on earth did you get the spilling of seed on the ground past the RUclips censors? That was salacious!
Can't wait for all the Sunday School teachers to be barraged with questions for all these stories tomorrow morning!! 😂
Let us know what he says😅
This is great. All the questions I used to have from our ever contradicting Christian Bible(s) answered and put together very nicely.
Awesome work bro! 👍🏼👍🏼
Lol. This is actually very well done. No, wasn't told this stuff back in Sunday school. But did my own reading back in the day 😅
The bit with the "Nobody is allowed to indulge this guys cuck fetish " had me rolling. This video is great XD
I just found your channel and I gotta say this is some of the best stuff I've seen in a while.
As an adult convert to Christianity (because I always had low self-esteem and a thing for feeling unreasonably guilty), I can confirm that after finally sitting down and actually thinking about all this shit (including all the shit in the NT which by no means gets a pass)-rather than relying only on highly selective in-group proselytization-I promptly left faith and regretted tf out of the last 24 years of my life.
Moral of the story. Don’t make major life decisions while under the influence of emotionally charged music, manipulative rhetoric, and extremely heinous threats of eternal torture. That is all.
Great vid. Though from the title I assumed it was the band Genesis. I was expecting a 10-minute loop of "Apocalypse in 7/8"
Alternate title : Genesis spicy edition 🌶️
Oh, this was good, great summary of these stories. I've always liked the Abraham "She's my sister" saga.
and his son Isaac followed suit
Same here It's kinky hee hee 🎉
As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (we're not mormons anymore), I can safely say, my seminary teacher did NOT skip this part. Seriously, if you're thinking sunday school is boring, so why should I go to seminary when it's basically the same thing? Well, this is why. Seminary teachers are more likely to talk about the crazy stuff than sunday school.
Seminary is like sunday school, but during the school day (or before, if you don't care about sleep) and not on sunday.
Thank you for pointing out that sex slavery is not a sign of improvement in any sense.
Can you do more Egyptian mythology?
That part where someone Haggles with god and successes is my favorite part of the bible
needs a part 2 asap
I'm always surprised how much I once learned and forgot just to remember it while watching a video like this or reading Wikipedia.