Are you an INFJ? If you're still unsure whether you're an INFJ, we made this video to help you with that: ruclips.net/video/D89N3_fFwrA/видео.html PSIHugPSIHeartPSIHeyPSICheers
Remember my fellow INFJ's, these are all things you can work with. I used to be extremely closed up about my feelings, now I am very open about them. Im setting less high expectations for myself, and im working on everything else. You can beat all of these bad traits, I believe in you and you know you can do it.
Haha, thanks, friend. It's wild that I didn't even know it was a rare type when I took the test 2 weeks ago. And I am at a point in my life where I'm trying to find a balance between myself. I'm working on all of these and I'm making progress. It can be done it's just wild that I'm seeing this video pop up while I had what could basically be a therapy session with my friend earlier tonight.
Trying! When I find the courage to open up I often get told I'm too much or causing everyone stress, which just reinforces the habit of not telling ppl things lol
You got this, IU totally get that. I'd recommend talking with a therapist as if you might come off as too much, it may be because you have so much difficult emotions you are dealing with in silence. Therapy can be scary at first, but it's so incredibly helpful. It's important to keep going though@@moondroparcana
The worst part of being an INFJ is feeling like you always give so much to absolutely everyone, and then not feeling like you get enough in return. But then hiding the fact that it hurts because it would make them feel bad too and that’s the LAST thing you want!
I feel this to my core. I always worry about what people think of me and I overthink situations and conversations constantly. I want attention, but at the same time I want to be left alone and I’m too afraid to open up.
As an INFJ, I feel as if I always have to be perfect, and it's exhausting. I tend to have mood swings, I definitely bottle things up, and I feel as if I have to be the one who holds things and I'm definitely known to be a bit stubborn. It really describes me so much, and I hope one day I'll be able to stop setting such high standards for myself.
It feels like you stole my whole thoughts... Mee too sis.. I rather want things on track that I planned.. And I am too stubborn for my family and I want to be perfect in my schedule that I would be upset if anything interferes... It's tooo frustrating 😭
You don’t have to be perfect. Perfection is unattainable for humans. You’re fighting a losing battle. You’re just a human, like everyone else. Accept it.
@@definitelynotJumana You don’t have to be perfect. Perfection is unattainable for humans. You’re fighting a losing battle. You’re just a human, like everyone else. Accept it.
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actually i found it but it really takes time,i was having a small chance to make friends with her but she approach me first so i kinda grateful because at least i have one person that only understands me as an INFJ
Being an INFJ is so hard, we love planning and perfecting everything but in the same time, we love to procastinate and overthinking. I want to socialize but i want to be alone :')
I also find I don't have a good feel for how long something takes. So when I plan my workday, I think a project will take an hour. When it takes four, it throws off my entire plan and I get stressed out.
I tried for a long time to bottle up my emotions, and even recently when it came to a breaking point I still started with "I don't mean to burden you" or "If you feel uncomfortable or annoyed you can tell me to stop"
Same here For school projects I do most of the work and usually I pick somebody who has trouble learning so this project will help boost their grades. Actually is the opposite they pick me I was a loner so they want me to help them. And I was so happy. And after everything was done I asked them, "Are you ok with this?" "I am not forcing you to say what you don't want" " Do you like it?" And they are like "It's perfect" and after still thinking maybe he or she was nice and did not want to upset me. Its so exhausting
@@HEROSASUKE99I can’t agree more Sometimes I feel like a therapist who herself need therapy I seriously tend to bottle my feelings And when I talk abt them later on I feel embarrassed on opening up It’s seriously tiring😩
The hardest part of being an INFJ is that we always want to be selfless because we care too much, but will end up regretting it because we doesn't feel appreciated. Yet, still doing it again and again.
Another “dark side INFJ” thing is we’re a walking contradiction. And we have lots of interests, as well as want people to know them, but don’t want to say them
I’m a Virgo but I have no idea how that affects being INFJ. XD I loved this video, my mother and I are both INFJ’s and we tend to feed off of each others overthinking! It’s helped me a lot though, it’s easier to remind myself not to over think! Anyone know about Virgo? I’m really curious and love learning :3
1: ✓ bottling up negative emotions 2: ✓ abruptly cutting people out of their lives 3: ✓ extremely high expectations 4: ✓ moodiness 5: ✓ self-destructive 6: ✓ stubbornness oops
Being an INFJ is kinda like you are positive in everything and negative in everything, like profectionist and procrastinator, or also at least for me extrovert AND introvert.
As an ENFP I urge all you INFJ’s to find someone you can trust or at the very least find creative ways to let out the emotions. Regardless of personality type some worries and anxieties are not healthy when bouncing around in your head. Much love for my INFJ brothers and sisters. ❤
The hardest challenge for me being an INFJ is the feeling of isolation. No matter how hard I work to make deep relationship with other people, I'm always ending up alone and feel alien in my own world.
As a INFJ i’m feeling exactly the same way, i wish i could do something to change this, sometimes i feel so selfish because i feel like i’m not grateful for my family and my friends but i just can’t stop feeling alone even if i’m not. So I’d rather be alone than with people.
I personally think the hardest part of being an INFJ is how I can NEVER balance between two opposite traits of my personality. it's like being a walking contradiction. I tend to be hardworking, but also lazy. I procrastinate, but I'm a big perfectionist. I'm always optimistic about my big dreams, but I'm also pessimistic about them. I don't like it when I get disrespected, but I disrespect myself even more. I hate not having a plan or not being able to plan something out, but I equally hate going by a routine or a list because it always makes me feel rushed. I like to have a lot of friends, but i fear social interactions with all of my heart. Compliments make me feel good about myself, but they also make me feel undeserving. See how confusing and frustrating that is? And what's even harder, is that some people who are like me find it very difficult or sometimes impossible to be passionate or ambitious about something, because we either simply get bored after it gets uninteresting, or become too obsessive over how perfect it needs to be And it gets very overwhelming having to be torn between polar opposite traits of my personality. Having the ability to understand and sympathize with many people to the point of being worn down by their concerns and feeling but never being understood myself makes it even more overwhelming Edit: would any of you find it ironic that this long rant was written by a 15 year old? 🙃🙃
Exactly what I wanna say but often when we try to tell these things to others no one cares to listen in the end I just keep these kind of thoughts to myself thinking that maybe I am bothering someone and it's only me being weird🥺🥺
@@agampreetkaur4523 exactly. It's very difficult to find someone who'd listen to us and understand us instead of calling us weird and indecisive. One of the main reasons why we like to keep to ourselves is if we attempt to talk to someone about our real selves. They never understand
I can realate to that its true because you want to tell someone how you fell but than your think you are going to brother him/her and than you tell yourself you shouldnt tell it and keep everything to yourself isnt easy because after a time your going to burnout
Hey there’s all infj’s here! But I agree, I don’t think I’ve ever met an infj and now that I think about it I’ve always felt something off about all the friends I do have
@@elchin5805 same. I was quite, well how do I put it, dissatisfied when I saw that an INFJ was one of the rarest personality types. It made sense too. Recently I’ve been feeling lonelier than ever, without having one friend with common interests 🙁 I hope one day I meet a person who is like me and we can be the bestest of friends 🙂🌱
@@nissachavez23 Never let your personality type upset you mate because we're blessed to have this personality. It's the rarest type and that's what makes us unique individuals of this world.
Being misunderstood is my biggest fear as an infj. And then I make up all these conversations in my head trying to clear the misunderstanding, but never really clear them irl
This is so true,it's like, io have a high expectations in an exam that I study so much time and it's easy for me but then I do it so much worse, thinking that I do it great but no,I hate that...
I'd say I probably most fear getting to deep in over my head and not being able to dig myself out ... So I guess commitment issues and thusly everything has to be perfect before I commit ... Anyways, keep on keeping on infj friend
True. But at the same time, i also feel like i shouldnt care. There are times when im anxious about something and that anxiety will disappear randomly and i brush it up as if im overreacting or i forgot about it.
Being an INFJ is hard because it feels like a constant mental showdown between anxiety and fear of failure but also wanting deep, emotional relationships. It's like a struggle of being introverted but wanting the benefits of extroversion... if that makes sense.
In a nutshell, we have friends, but we can't make real connections whit them. Is hard af to show how we feel, because we know nobody is going to understand us.
I'm really glad that as an INFJ, I try to improve my character and slowly get rid of my flaws instead of pretending they just don't exist. Of course, it's very hard to completely get rid of your flaws but every time I lessen the extremeness of my flaws I feel much better than I did before and much more proud of myself! I've actually only recently become aware of my inability to accept changes and I'm currently working on becoming more open to changes so wish me luck! :D
Good luck. I never saw these traits in me, but then I got into a relationship and now I do lmfaoooo. Really hard for me to truly recognize and change these things because I feel like everything I do makes sense, but I know I'm most likely just in denial.
@@shamstam Exactlyy, sometimes me thinking that everything I do makes sense in turn makes me think what if everyone's just smart and I'm the dumb one. I'm just in denial really. I can relate so hard, being aware of the stuff is easy but actually seriously acknowledging that stuff and wanting to change is hard.
Finding out I was "rare" was more of a epiphany for me than a source of Pride. It made everything else make more sense; why I felt like no one understood me, why I couldn't find people who I truly connected with, and why I felt like an Alien sent down to observe the Earthlings. Luckily I've found some IRL friends (3) who have the same type, and who I can commiserate with now. x)
From an outsiders perspective (INTP) with an INFJ sister: We dont really like each other that much because I know how manipulative she can be and we can see right through each other which creates this passive agressive sphere. She literally says stuff like "Dont tell them this or I will tell them your darkest secrets you didnt know I know about". So I'd say interactions like that and me not knowing how to handle that broke our trust in each other. Not sure if this is relevant to your comment but Id thought id share it anyways.
@@simianto9957 Oh, thats okay. As an infj, i think she doesnt want to be open about those things she doesnt want anyone to know because most of us are shy, but its still bad that she tries to manipulate you. I think you both should communicate more and understand each other :)
Believe me I can relate to what you just said so completely I mean wow I'm still processing this because. I just I'm 62 years old and it's taking me this long to find something out wow I've been in and out of therapy since I was 24 years old I don't know I would think that maybe I would have..... I mean I'm not 100% sure but I am pretty sure that cuz I have most of the traits I am like seven out of eight of the positive ones in the negative ones I mean I just I just stopped it because there was something the most homework after that damn that's all end up getting caught up in all these crazy situations helping people and end up like you said getting hurt thank you for your input
if you're wondering why there are so many infj's online when we're the rarest personality type, my theory is that we just prefer to socialize like this lol
As an INFJ I found these relatable, though some were more relatable than others. I especially related to the bottling up emotions, and pushing people away.
Okay but being an INFJ feels like a living hell just because of how contradicting your thoughts are. Really makes you question who you are and every choice you make that it feels like you're going crazy. To all my fellow INFJs out there. We will make it through! Keep your head up!
The hardest thing about an INFJ is understanding everyone else and their issues but you're never able to discover yourself or find your own solutions..
Well the key to understanding yourself is gone curious of yourself. Ask yourself questions as to like why am I feeling this or what is this? It's not impossible to discover yourself... You will be a lot stronger for it once you reach the depths of yourself
Im an INTP with an INFJ sister. But like damn because we know each other so well she shows her manipulative side very often and I dó understand her which doesnt make things better because we see through each other like glass. She literally manipulates me by saying stuff like "Dont tell them this or I will tell them your darkest secrets you dont even know I know about
I'm an INFJ and i realated to every single things you said and the hardest part of being INFJ is that i can't find someone who is just like me that's why i always end up alone my expectations are very high , I want other to treat me care for me just like I do for them and that's why i always gets disappointed
Same, like there was this time more than one ppl wants to talk to me about something and i try to talk to them all at once. I fell asleep in class afterwards
Same. Only relationship I can keep going with is with my husband. Something about having that intense deeper relationship keeps it in lock. Just like with my children. They're mine & we share a life together, so I am bonded with them. I am also close with certain family members..but cannot fully open up to anyone else who makes me uncomfortable. If I cannot trust someone, I pull away. I'm not even close with my own mother and my siblings only know half of me I want to show them. It's difficult. I've learned as I've gotten older to FORCE myself to change. To be authentic, to calm down, let things roll off my back, and trust that most people aren't out to get me and that they have their own trauma to deal with. It helps a lot.
Being an infj isn’t that special- it just feels like I’m weirder than everyone else ngl i didnt think so many people would actually respond i kinda feel better ig
@@Alexandra-hg9pz that’s pretty dumb. Not you, but the circumstance. why did they find that out anyways? It doesn’t change anything at all, you’re literally the same person with a new label
As an INFJ, I’d say my biggest weakness is that I become too loyal to people I’m close to, and then it’ll become impossible to make any other connections ;-;
INFJ here, and can relate to ALL of the points you brought up. It's a work in progress to work on these toxic traits, but it's the only way I know how to live. It'll be hard to re-wire my brain into acting/being different
I don't know why everyone thinks being an INFJ is great coz it's rare It's not easy to be an INFJ, I wish I had a different personality tbh We try to understand everyone, but we ourselves are so complicated that others fail to understand us. We want to socialize but are extroverted only toward family and close friends or sometimes not towards them either coz our moods really fluctuate We never even realize when we start moving away from people in a lonely corner I keep really high expectations of myself, coz I don't wanna disappoint anyone Most of the time when I'm down or going through something, I mostly cry alone, I don't have a shoulder, rather I don't want one coz I don't wanna put my problems on others As much as I like to laugh and smile, I like to stay alone... My fellow INFJs, we know this is relatable, but I'm sure there's always a way to be happy and live a better life. Let's try to change ourselves for the better, of course, we can't change our personality but we can definitely change our habits, right? I hope everyone is doing well. BIG HUGS!! Edit: Thank you for the likes and replies, hopefully, we can share our problems and find those people in our life who will understand us. Once again let's change for the better. Loads and loads of Love, Support, hope and best wishes
It's very much relatable. I have typed INFJ on several tests, including in school. I also have learned about the types, really analysed it. Sometimes I relate to other types but INFJ is how my mind ticks. These problems are tough ones and i too deal with them. However, with those you are more open to, if you have managed to find someone you trust, tell them. I hate being negative and talking about my issues as I worry I make other's feel down, especially when my mam has accused me of making her upset because she saw me cry. That situation made me feel so guilty and upset. HOWEVER, it is still important to talk about your feelings. Even if you don't understand them, and are so overwhelmed that you can't explain properly, and need to think, just let people know. I tell my boyfriend when I'm upset because he asked me to. It really helps, and I always tell him to let me know if anything ever bothers him. It's no burden to me. It's ok not to live up to expectations. I have really struggled this year with my work, but I have learned that being good at things is not always your best. Sometimes your best is just ok. And that's ok :) be kind as you are to others :) I have no solution for the one about cutting ties. I am bad at keeping in contact because I often focus on very close relationships, such as my family and boyfriend. I really try to remember to reach out to friends, but I have let go of many. I feel no loss in less interaction, but certainly guilt, because I never really stop caring about people. I forgive quickly, unless I am hurt repeatedly, then I turn cold. The 'door slam' is what that would be I suppose 😅 Also my boyfriend didn't think I was introverted because I am so open to him, but the opposite with others haha 😂 But I am actually probably more easily over stimulated and socially drained than he is 😂 Hugs :)
You have no idea how much this comment spoke to me. You described how I feel in a way I could never. I'm really bad at explaining how I feel. Sending love
Extremely relatable but for me I've just given up hope that's I'll find someone who'll understand... I just feel like I'll end up being disappointed as usual if I do :(
Honestly I just feel like I’m crazy. I understand everything yet nothing, feel dumb yet the smartest person on the planet. I am extremely hard on myself and yet get cocky with things every once in awhile. So yeah, I feel insane.
Tbh being an infj is not at all that special as people like to exaggerate it, we are just messed up people trying to live our lives through this hell hole of our super intuitive inner side and a natural habit of overthinking with tons of trust issues everyday, just wanna give a hug to all my fellow infj's out there, you are a fighter! Omg I didn't expected this to blow up....thank you so much for the back hugs! Love you fellow INFJ's And again, not all INFJ's are like that too...yeah some may have been successful to overcome their weaknesses which I'm trying to do too, that's the way human beings evolve and become stronger, but that doesn't mean that an infj can't overcome all this, it takes time and experience to control these traits and use them for our own benefit
I recently performed the test and discovered that I'm an INFJ, and now I have answers to most of my questions that were never answered by anyone else. The most shocking part is the thoughts that I mostly get dissolved about others that allow me to understand them in a better way but I ain't have words to explain mine.
being one of the rarest personality type doesn’t always mean positive aspects. it also includes the fact that finding another INFJ is almost impossible and not even yourself can understand your emotions. overall it sucks. sending love to all my fellow INFJ’s!
Once you start cutting out the people who don't even try to get you and start being more open about your INFJ ass, other INFJs will come along. When I came across the test, I sent a link to many of my friends out of curiosity. And in my inner circle were 3 other INFJs and some pretty close personality types. But they are also hard to handle sometimes - just like me. We need a LOT of acceptance on and from various levels.
Fr I deadass went full philosophical on the quote, “ever wonder why were here?” From red vs blue in gym class today. Ps if you don’t know what that is or haven’t watched it then you should.
@@Someguy028 BRUHH-- LITERALLY- I FEEL DEPRIVED OF A GOOD CONVERSATION. like god, he could just be made up, by some old greedy man, the whole idea of the world, the universe is irrelevant, we are gonna die, but I still wanna know, like what if aliens are controlling us, deadass, what if we are being controlled by people outside of us, like we are a game and this is some stupid roleplay to them.
@@cosmic9arrow I thought of this in multiple different ways. Whenever I get up to play my ps4 everyday(I'm grounded now tho) and or waking up, getting on the bus, and continuing. If that's what you mean then most definitely yes)'-'(
I am deffinetly a INFJ. In all my freindships i am the one person whos always open and always listens and tries to help. I love to help people feel good about them self while I am secretly suffering. I have many, many hardships in life. I try to hide my emotions even though I need help, I dont want people to worry about me. I try to tell myself I am cool and are helping not hurting, I have increadably low self esteem. I never feel confident and are constantly worrying about what people think of me even ifs the way I eat or the way I look. When i grow up i want be a counselor and wnt to help all the people with mental problems. I hope one day I can change the world. this channle has helped me out. it has helped me figure out I have secret annxoity and secretly hate myself. thank you for all the advice and facts. :)
@@sophiaisabelle027 I think the best way to overcome it is to focus on the moment and be aware of the people and things around us...good luck everyone 🧡💙🌏
For me, the hardest part of being a INFJ is trying to match everyone's energy when I'm with them, to the point I don't know who's the real me without feeling like I'm just pretending Edit: To everyone that liked and replied, let’s all gather together and give each other a hug, we really need it
As an INFJ, I always see deeper meaning in everything. Because of that, I tend to over analyze people being nice to me and think they actually have an entire scheme behind it. I have extreme trust issues.
The hardest thing about being and INFJ is our ability to see through people and understand them and yet none of the other personalities can understand us INFJ. I guess it's how it is for the personalities to be balanced well.
This is just me but I feel as though it is situational for the other personalities for example I am a infp yet I am a lot less open which leads to hardly anyone caring/trying to care. While infj’s May get it the most it can happen to other people as well
Yeah, especially when you can basically HEAR the person's thoughts and cut them off in conversation because you know them that well. You never mean to make them feel like you don't care or you think they're predictable you just wanna engage in the conversation because you're interested
Mm. As an INFJ, I for one can always see when you're compulsively lying, but I leave it alone because maybe you'll be happy of I do, or of you have a bad day, or need a hug. But people never see through the stupid lies I tell so it's like they don't know me, they believe me when I say my days' been great, and never am I offered a hug. It's okay tho, I know other have it worse. Lmao just wanted to vent
INFJs can have friends, actually... often very good friends. It's possible that you haven't met anyone who takes the trouble to understand you properly yet, though. Try to be open to it and you'll hopefully get there, and in the meantime just... try not to overthink it, either. A good criteria for a potential friend is "Does this person truly care about other people?" ^_^
oof, as an INFJ, that does hit hard, but, ofc we do have friends, but just a few of them, and whoever they are have a REEEEEEEALLY close bonds w/ them. So in my perspective, quality is better than quantity.
This made me feel so much better after knowing tons of people go through the same thing and that people understand. This is one thing I would never be able to express in my own words. ❤
All these are so true, and honestly I don't know why people "deeply crave to be INFJ" to feel "cool and special" when in fact, you as an INFJ don't feel special at all but instead you spend your time overthinking and trying to figure out what the hell is wrong with you for being the way you are and then realizing you're doomed for life if you don't try to change yourself and the traits of your own freaking personality. It's a struggle.
There are a lot of INFJ's online because we are searching the internet to try to understand ourselves. However, even after all this time, I still don't understand myself...
Kinda reminds me of another quote someone said: "Sex is like fire, inside fireplace (marriage) it will warm up your home, anywhere else and it will burn the entire place down". So don't play with fire :)
@@yungfelix5079 meaning sex is not only skin deep thing it connects souls of people so you have to be very careful while doing it, if you do it properly in the right context as it was intend then it can be a great thing, but if you are reckless with sex you can get into all kinds of trouble both emotional and physical, you shouldn't play around with it. It affects both parties.
This is a good and fairly accurate video. I'm an INFJ-T. A few things though: I don't tend to lash out, I usually bottle it up and tell them it's fine when they've wronged me, but I may distance myself from them for a bit. I don't really cut anyone out of my life, but when things start to get overwhelming, I put some distance between us for a time. I still try to offer help, but I'm less available. I just feel like I need time to sort through things. The high expectations is an interesting one. While I'm generally a perfectionist, I don't hold those same expectations for others. As long as people try, I'm happy with that. Everything else was spot on! Thank you for the video!
To be clear alot of people bottle up thier emotions , that doesnt make you infj , the real infj is when you listen to almost everyone and care about their emotions while you cannot do the same yourself , you can never trust anyone to open up to , also this makes you wanna be away from everyone as much as possible bc if you know people then that means you have to listen without being listened to.
And I have this thing that I can't stop doing😔cut relationship with friend because of disappointment, I have high expectations with people and I hate that.
I’m happy to see there is always people to understand you and you’re never alone, it’s really underwhelming and I love this community, not just INJF, also others who tried to understand us, so grateful x)
As an INFJ i have to say i feel a little bit insane. Like i just don't fit in and i've been trying my whole life to 'come up with a personality, or show a side of me' that others will like. And now, i'm having an identity crisis because i just don't know who am i. I feel like i'll never find someone who understands me and value my traits, like truly. So, it's not fun being an INFJ, cuz i have to please myself when i'm alone, but i also feel the need to please others when i feel like going out and socialize. And even tho i know this is not good, i just don't know what to do about it.
i read this and all i could think was, same girl, same. just exactly same. its rather fascinating how there are actually people like me, because most of the time i feel like NO ONE is (which is usual but, i feel it ig more extreme.) a few months ago i came to realise im a misfit. a label cant work for me. a style. an aesthetic. so i try to just do what feels good, and don't care too much about, anything whatsoever
You don't need others to like you. Just be kind to people and you don't have to go through an identity crisis cause whatever you do or how you are like it's you. So, don't be afraid of welcoming the new you and just go at it cause it's you.
Don't do anything about it. Stop trying to be somebody else, be yourself. The only thing you can do to improve yourself is listen. People will tell you and if it don't that's their problem.
I relate to all of these - especially in my younger years - when my boundaries were shit. As I got older, I started to chill out, let go, and develop healthier boundaries.
Test: you are an INFJ Friend: you are an INFJ Parents: you are an INFJ Heart: you are an INFJ God: you are an INFJ Brain: let’s take the test again for the tenth time just to make sure...
Yeah, there's always that small doubt in some corner. " what if..... it's not what it seems? Let's do it again just one more time" . Trying to chase and CATCH that " 100% " assurance and satisfaction really drives one crazy xD
I think the hardest thing about INFJs is we want answers and facts and perfection. But, we are artist and musicians and writers, and we are good at it. But a lot of the time we do not like these activities we are good at because we become obsessive and controlling and want it to be perfect but no matter how hard we try it will never be perfect to us. We are the type A yet left brain people. It is frustrating. You can tell us all you want how amazing we are at something but only we can decide for ourselves whether we’re good at it. Don’t try to change our minds, we do not trust your word because we know opinions are not facts. And we want facts.
@@egoistagatto7942 I've though about what you said for a while, and I can see that I had the same situation like these where I give up on something or a project just because I didn't reach the perfection I wanted or *was it the perfection you believe they wanted?* Think about! We INFJs do things while considering many perspectives and opinions, for a simple example, an INFJ author ,who writes novels, would prefer to focus on adding events that would catch most attention and favoritty rather than putting his unique ideas, that's why they'll be obssessive whether what they made is "perfect" in any readers' eyes! Just like a fact that none can deny easily! So in conclusion, you loved your theatre activity cuz you found yourself filled with ideas and passion for it, but because you pressured yourself with others' perspectives when someone is not satisfied with your results, you as well become the same while not noticing. (Pls correct me if I misunderstood you! And sorry for my bad grammar 😅✋I hope I helped you see and understand the situation more clear )
1. bottling up negative emotions 1:16 2. abruptly cutting people out of their lives 1:53 3. extremely high expectations 2:31 4. moodiness 3:04 5. self-destructive 3:34 6. stubbornness 4:13 I hope I could help! (: -INFJ
I go between an ENFJ/INFJ. I feel like this video helped me realize the duality that is displayed in my personality. I have been described by others throughout my life as “bossy” yet “quiet” and “friendly” yet “mean”. I realize this is likely because I am highly sensitive and absorb everything around me on top of already having my own things to worry about, so when I am overstimulated, I tend to lash out or become bitter although generally that is not how I am. I am usually bubbly and friendly and I have learned to openly express my feelings (part of my E), so I can see how this duality could confuse other people. I love spending time with others while also having my own time so my feelings are always contradicting, but I am getting better at knowing when I need to step away and who to avoid to keep my own peace and thus maintain positive relationships around me. Reading the comments, this duality seems to be the case for many others too, so it is nice to hear others’ experiences as well.
INFJs are literally walking contradictions. As human beings we are social creatures yet we dislike social interaction most of the time. We are super emotional and really deep thinkers yet we fake a persona to fit in. We are artists and desire to create, yet it all has to be done by our own specific processes. We desire for every one around us to be happy and feel free while we live in our self created pain. We are are actually quite black in white in how we feel, yet we hardly have a straight answer for what we’re thinking.
Yes I always feel like I have an extreme personality, I can be cruel, cold but also I can be kind and warm. I would neglect everything when I don’t want to feel anything but also thought about things so deeply.
ngl i started crying when i read the INFJ description on the myers briggs test. it felt like for the first time in my life someone understood how i felt.... i’m too uncomfortable to talk to even my closest friends about something that’s even remotely personal to me
Haha also same! But very encouraging all the same. I'd taken Myers-Briggs tests a few times and initially got INFJ but thought "No that can't be right if it's so rare..." but this video really confirms a lot of issues I've been noticing about myself or suspecting. Helps to know what my weaknesses are so I can work on them!
I am married to an INFJ, and have a sister that is an INFJ as well. They often expect the rest of us to know what is happening inside of them without actually communicating what is happening inside of them. My mantra is “we cannot read your mind”.
Being an INFJ...we always live in our own world and expect this world to be the same, I find very difficult to adjust myself to new things and we pressurize ourself mentally alot. It's very difficult to make yourself fit into normal things that this entire world does. N one more thing, we are not that good at finding a true friend because we don't trust anyone easily (in my case it's like this). So, being an INFJ is very exhausting cuz we are rare and we don't fit in with everyone. This is what think in my case. (Like if u r an INFJ).
As an INFJ, I take everything to heart without showing it (I tend to be overemotional, but only in my head if that makes sense). Every little criticism I receive is a big deal to me even if it wasn't meant to be and I end up doing everything I can to fix it because it's in my nature to try to be "perfect" even though perfect is unachievable... Being INFJ is so complex and exhausting, I wish I could not care as much of what others think!!
This is true, with text messages after someone sends a message it ends up taking me over an hour just to write it, because I worry so much about how it would impact the other person, when it's just a simple text message. It's quite exhausing.
i feel like being an INFJ is hard because you're always giving yourself to others when they need someone, but you don't realize you're the one that needs support the most. you dont realize it because you're busy being everyone else's support and it starts to drain your energy so you hide away, shut down and recharge. if that makes sense.
That's not always the case. Being someone else's support isn't always tiring for INFJ's. In fact, they don't have many opportunities to be there for someone (emotionally) because our society is growing more and more private. It's more like they want to be the support.
@@se1kura928 I would say it is like wanting to be the support until you realize someone just contacts you for the sole reason to be the threapist again and not for the fun stuff anymore. It's like...helping gives me energy back until it get's into this kind of pattern and suddenly it drain's energy every time i see they try to contact me. My best friend is very outgoing and dramatic, but helping them gives me always energy back, we have a good time and still laugh a lot. The people that share their problems and go right afterwards are...tirying on the other hand
since i was a kid i struggled explaining my own thoughts and emotions to others and thats made me feel diffrent from anyone i know...but now every thing is clear in just built different.
Biggest tip I can give to fellow INFJs is to remember that you can’t save everyone and you can’t help someone who won’t help themselves. Also go out and meet tons of people, it’s uncomfortable but that’s how you find those people you make really close relationships with
Thank you. Sending you a hug back. I hope that you will take some time for yourself and be kind to yourself 'cause as an INFJ I know how we can beat ourselves up and keep having negative thoughts. That's literally what I'm going through and I don't want anyone else to go through it.
This is the funniest thing to me right now after connecting with this stuff. I thought I was nuts for a minute. Happy to find out that it’s just my personality trait. Took me 15mins to go through a huge roller coaster of emotions. Best RUclips account around. Obviously this isn’t proven but man I believe it could be fact. This is the first time I’m hearing these studies of tendencies and it’s so relatable for me.
This is so true to me. I see everything in perspective especially when it's presented like this. Always have been keeping things to myself thinking that nobody will ever understand me. And I think I find that easier than having to explain myself further too and be vulnerable.
I need to be completely left alone at least 3 times a week otherwise I don't cope! My nightmare would be a large group holiday with no chance to be alone or the Big Brother house! I'd lock myself in the toilet for a good hour to just sit alone and pretend I'm constipated haha
...and that is the reason why I will never try relationships. Practically all people I know who are in relationships, every single bit of "alone/refuel" time gets completely shoved out, which would bug the living shit out of me. Because you know, if someone is needing alone time, then that person MUST be hiding something (aka BS drama which I also intently hate).
@@gamr13th for me, my girlfriend BECAME the alone time. if i ever felt like relaxing or just refueling i'd go and talk to her. don't be like me. we broke up and now i can't function.
@@Becky-vb8fs I also relate to this. This last month I spent my time with a lot of people and don't get me wrong, I had a great time. But coming home I didn't have any source of energy in me. As an INFJ, I notice we tend to need our personal space from time to time :")
What people think about INFJs: - This is the best personality since it is the most rare - The think/say we are *unique* What we think: what does he/she mean by unique? In the good way or in the wrong way? Why am I questioning this tho? This is not overthinking right? Hold on, am I overthinking about overthinking?
I need an answer for everything, especially about myself because even I get confused with myself lol I've taken countless online tests about almost everything about me, be it my eye colour, or my romantic type, or even a mental illness (I'm through that phase) I just get really wound up if it's unclear. I used to repeatedly ask my friends what job I'd be good at, what am I good at etc and I find it annoying too
@@georgememmott4398 ok wtf that is so me i look up everything having to do with me whether it's personality or health related and it's been almost two years and I haven't been able to decide if i really want to stick with my current undergrad course lol fml
I don’t want to be rare :( bc an infj so Its like this feeling of overthinking and 3:52 thingy?? I DONT KNOW HOW TO DESCRIBE IT and you feel what other ppl might be feeling but other ppl are clueless of how u feel ahh:’) But yeah I agree what u said
I've known I was INFJ-T for a while now, taken the test multiple times and gotten the same result each time. Never realized how much of my actions were on account of my personality type. I'm a perfectionist but huge procrastinator, I've always known I'm incredibly intelligent but never put forth the work (been told by almost all teachers over the years), and I try to help all my friends through their problems expecting nothing in return but satisfaction knowing I did good, want to socialize and be quick and witty like other people but my brain has to sit and think of the perfect response instead of speaking my mind. Love these videos from y'all, definitely been a big help on my journey to finding myself, so thank you.
yeah. And when I say I'm fine, I usually trick ppl into thinking I am. I don't want people to see what's really going on, it's embarrassing & I hate it, hate it hate it! And this is why I can never get help. Therapy, Counseling? No, because I don't want anybody to know. I don't want to talk to anybody about this. Not even a stranger. People are too judgemental, I'm scared that someone is going to judge me. 😀 and someone will 😆
Took the personality test and was told I was INFJ in 2012 but it makes sense I don’t like labeling myself we are all unique as individuals no matter what you are
After a point, I've just stopped expecting anything from anyone, because I know I have high standards that no one will bother meeting. I'm a definition of "disappointed but not surprised"
1. bottling up negative emotions 2. Abruptly cutting people out of their lives 3. Extremely high expectations 4. Moodiness 5. Self destructive 6. Stubbornness
As an INFJ, our hearts are always at stress. I'm afraid we will die from heart attack for hiding all of these emotions inside. I've always wanted to be understood but ended up misunderstood esp by my parents *sigh*.
don't mention it. I sometimes feel that I'm 23 years old and I've spent most of all these years with my mother and siblings but they still don't understand me. In fact, it's like they don't even know me
1. Bottling up emotions, makes me really ill. 2. I have cut so many people out of my life including my real father. 3. I'm told I'm very moody 5. Very self destructive and ALWAYS overthink 6. Very stubborn Totally me
I have felt this and the frustration it brought is overwhelming. We exist with you, Soleil. I hope we find "our people" and get to live fulfilling lives.
How come everyone says they’re an infj but they werent even professionally cased by a psychologist- its the rarest personality type and you most likely arent an INFJ
Being an INFJ is really hard, you always tend to care more, that's why the moment you lose your caring spirit for someone, it means you're too hurt to be there for them any longer. It's not easy to cut them off, but eventually, you'll do.
Im an INTP with an INFJ sister. But like damn because we know each other so well she shows her manipulative side very often and I dó understand her which doesnt make things better because we see through each other like glass. She literally manipulates me by saying stuff like "Dont tell them this or I will tell them your darkest secrets you dont even know I know about.
Personally, I dont think it's a good idea to date someone who's an INFJ too. Do you really wanna date yourself? I think anyone can love and understand INFJ with the right process. I think this will work if both INFJs are ripe. Two unripe INFJs dating is super hit or miss.
I actually found someone that is an INFJ like me and even with 10 years of age difference we can have the best deep talks and get along very well. We're friends so I can't tell you how it is when you date, but I can say that it's great to have someone to talk to and who can relate to you & understand you on a deeper level.
Are you an INFJ? If you're still unsure whether you're an INFJ, we made this video to help you with that: ruclips.net/video/D89N3_fFwrA/видео.html PSIHugPSIHeartPSIHeyPSICheers
I'm an INxJ
Can you create something for INTJ, too? Thanks :)
I have no clue what I am, and I’m fine with that 💜
Edit: wow I’ve made over 100 comments on this channel. That’s insane lol
I'm also an Infj.
This video has helped me so much
a infj is like the therapist friend who doesnt get therapy back
This.
👍
😢
There couldn't have been a more accurate description
That’s why I see my own therapist.
Me: Extremely high expectations
Also me: *Procrastinates*
Can relate!!
Same - withholding effort is a defense mechanism against potential failure
Research on perfectionism (common for INFJ's) and ways to overcome it
Saaame
Perfectionism creates procrastination, for when you feel like you can't do something perfectly, you'd rather do nothing.
Hello fellow INFJs
Heyyyy MvPerryyyyyyy!!
Why hello there!
Hey, how yall doin?
Hiii
Hi Famous guy
Remember my fellow INFJ's, these are all things you can work with. I used to be extremely closed up about my feelings, now I am very open about them. Im setting less high expectations for myself, and im working on everything else. You can beat all of these bad traits, I believe in you and you know you can do it.
😭🙏🏽🔥♥️👏🏽 appreciate the encouragement
Haha, thanks, friend. It's wild that I didn't even know it was a rare type when I took the test 2 weeks ago. And I am at a point in my life where I'm trying to find a balance between myself. I'm working on all of these and I'm making progress. It can be done it's just wild that I'm seeing this video pop up while I had what could basically be a therapy session with my friend earlier tonight.
Never
Trying! When I find the courage to open up I often get told I'm too much or causing everyone stress, which just reinforces the habit of not telling ppl things lol
You got this, IU totally get that. I'd recommend talking with a therapist as if you might come off as too much, it may be because you have so much difficult emotions you are dealing with in silence.
Therapy can be scary at first, but it's so incredibly helpful. It's important to keep going though@@moondroparcana
“The worlds rarest personality type.” I’m putting this on my resume.
Hey, put me as a reference
omg same
Every one in one hundred people have it, why bother?
Good idea
i d o n t f e e l s p e c i a l b e c a u s e i a m n o t i n f j a n d t h e w h o l e c o m m e n t s e c t i o n i s
The worst part of being an INFJ is feeling like you always give so much to absolutely everyone, and then not feeling like you get enough in return. But then hiding the fact that it hurts because it would make them feel bad too and that’s the LAST thing you want!
Completely agree.
So, i am just learning how to be grateful for all i have right now)
Your opinion on this?)
THIS ^^^^^^^
@@Fer-vx6df hi) sorry, but what is this?😄
@@NA-rs5mi oops, the thing Arrianna said
@@Fer-vx6df sorry for my misunderstanding😅
I found her comment interesting, so wanted to know her opinion on my feedback)
My biggest struggle as a INFJ: no matter how hard I try I feel like I never fit in anywhere..regardless if people like me or not
Same. It's really hard, right? I don't even know if my circle of friends really see me as a friend, cos I really don't communicate much.
I feel this to my core. I always worry about what people think of me and I overthink situations and conversations constantly. I want attention, but at the same time I want to be left alone and I’m too afraid to open up.
@@azurablue98 I ended up didn't understand about true meaning of friendship and those love language :')
Same. Feels like im from another planet or something
Yes, even when I was young in my teens & 20s I felt alienated from people even my own family...
As an INFJ, I feel as if I always have to be perfect, and it's exhausting. I tend to have mood swings, I definitely bottle things up, and I feel as if I have to be the one who holds things and I'm definitely known to be a bit stubborn. It really describes me so much, and I hope one day I'll be able to stop setting such high standards for myself.
It feels like you stole my whole thoughts... Mee too sis.. I rather want things on track that I planned.. And I am too stubborn for my family and I want to be perfect in my schedule that I would be upset if anything interferes... It's tooo frustrating 😭
You don’t have to be perfect. Perfection is unattainable for humans. You’re fighting a losing battle. You’re just a human, like everyone else. Accept it.
@@definitelynotJumana You don’t have to be perfect. Perfection is unattainable for humans. You’re fighting a losing battle. You’re just a human, like everyone else. Accept it.
mee too... I tend to break the bottle suddenly
Exactly.
Worst case scenario for INFJ: Getting backstabbed
Yeah.. tell me about it.. it's a never ending thinking loop.. isn't it..??
@@androiddoctor2015 yeah
im thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me thinking about me........................... (help)
If I ever got backstabbed I'll probably think that they had their reasons and it was somehow my fault so I'll let it go.
@@dustinasdf959 same
For me, the hardest part of being INFJ is that, you'll probably won't meet someone like you who could understand the real you
i felt this sm...😔
I fekt
actually i found it but it really takes time,i was having a small chance to make friends with her but she approach me first so i kinda grateful because at least i have one person that only understands me as an INFJ
Yeah
I can feel it
Being an INFJ is so hard, we love planning and perfecting everything but in the same time, we love to procastinate and overthinking. I want to socialize but i want to be alone :')
It almost feel like I wrote that myself, it's so true
@@ashleydelgado3786 i think I did write that myself😂that’s exactly me
procrastination sucks ass!
Fuuck yesss
I also find I don't have a good feel for how long something takes. So when I plan my workday, I think a project will take an hour. When it takes four, it throws off my entire plan and I get stressed out.
I tried for a long time to bottle up my emotions, and even recently when it came to a breaking point I still started with "I don't mean to burden you" or "If you feel uncomfortable or annoyed you can tell me to stop"
Same here
For school projects I do most of the work and usually I pick somebody who has trouble learning so this project will help boost their grades. Actually is the opposite they pick me I was a loner so they want me to help them. And I was so happy. And after everything was done I asked them, "Are you ok with this?" "I am not forcing you to say what you don't want" " Do you like it?"
And they are like "It's perfect" and after still thinking maybe he or she was nice and did not want to upset me. Its so exhausting
@@HEROSASUKE99I can’t agree more
Sometimes I feel like a therapist who herself need therapy
I seriously tend to bottle my feelings
And when I talk abt them later on I feel embarrassed on opening up
It’s seriously tiring😩
THIS IS SO INFJ TT
The hardest part of being an INFJ is that we always want to be selfless because we care too much, but will end up regretting it because we doesn't feel appreciated. Yet, still doing it again and again.
Lol 😂 I feel so called out rn...🙆♀️♥️ lots of hugs and love.. just wanted to let you know that there will be someone who will appreciate you someday
So related....
I feel so called out 😞😞😞
Why r u screaming at me 😂😂
thats not a real infj. just because you relate to one thing, doesn't mean you are. you fit into plenty other categories
Another “dark side INFJ” thing is we’re a walking contradiction. And we have lots of interests, as well as want people to know them, but don’t want to say them
I can relate ;( And that sucks, to be honest.
So true! I’m a libra and I’m the most unbalanced person on this planet
@@marlaelektra I myself am a Sagittarius, so my whole INFJ being makes it even more contradictory
I’m a Virgo but I have no idea how that affects being INFJ. XD I loved this video, my mother and I are both INFJ’s and we tend to feed off of each others overthinking! It’s helped me a lot though, it’s easier to remind myself not to over think! Anyone know about Virgo? I’m really curious and love learning :3
@@victoriariggles6498 I don’t really know a whole lot about Virgo’s, but even a quick google search works for astrology usually works 👍
1: ✓ bottling up negative emotions
2: ✓ abruptly cutting people out of their lives
3: ✓ extremely high expectations
4: ✓ moodiness
5: ✓ self-destructive
6: ✓ stubbornness
oops
same .-.
same T_T
me, especially with the cutting relation. idk why i kinda dont like to be into deep relation.
imagine
@@helldronez yeah, its kinda scary if you know what can happen especially if you've seen or had it happen before
i feel really comfortable here to see people having similar problems as me
Being an INFJ is kinda like you are positive in everything and negative in everything, like profectionist and procrastinator, or also at least for me extrovert AND introvert.
Yes, this
INFJs are walking contradictions
When I say the struggle😭
This is so accurate whattt this is the only personality test that matches me perfectly and these are things that I thought were problems with just me
I thought I was bipolar for years but guess I'm just an infj t
For being a “advocate” we really don’t advocate for ourselves. 😞
Yeah but at least we advocate others
As a fellow INFJ Advocate I agree unfortunately.
Yeah..,😔
Yes as a fellow advocate I can unfortunately agree
I even tried to do so but.....
I left😔😔 it's not easy
Them: you can't just cut people out of your life!
INFJ: *snip snap*
so me, like idk if it’s supposed to be a problem but if you’re no longer benefiting me positively “snip snap”
@@arielfarra7979 Exactly
It became a habit 😅
What was that? I can't hear you from the sound of my giant scissors!
Yep XD
As an ENFP I urge all you INFJ’s to find someone you can trust or at the very least find creative ways to let out the emotions. Regardless of personality type some worries and anxieties are not healthy when bouncing around in your head.
Much love for my INFJ brothers and sisters. ❤
Thank you ❤
Thank you
As an INFJ, I absolutely love ENFPs
thats the problem when you lose them you cant get them back
my partner is an ENFP and I thank God every day that he "gets me"
The hardest challenge for me being an INFJ is the feeling of isolation. No matter how hard I work to make deep relationship with other people, I'm always ending up alone and feel alien in my own world.
I am sorry. I wish I knew how to help. -ENFP
As a INFJ i’m feeling exactly the same way, i wish i could do something to change this, sometimes i feel so selfish because i feel like i’m not grateful for my family and my friends but i just can’t stop feeling alone even if i’m not.
So I’d rather be alone than with people.
aAaaaAaaaa same
Yep! Me too. 💜
yeah fr, the feeling of isolation is horrible
I personally think the hardest part of being an INFJ is how I can NEVER balance between two opposite traits of my personality. it's like being a walking contradiction. I tend to be hardworking, but also lazy. I procrastinate, but I'm a big perfectionist. I'm always optimistic about my big dreams, but I'm also pessimistic about them. I don't like it when I get disrespected, but I disrespect myself even more. I hate not having a plan or not being able to plan something out, but I equally hate going by a routine or a list because it always makes me feel rushed. I like to have a lot of friends, but i fear social interactions with all of my heart. Compliments make me feel good about myself, but they also make me feel undeserving. See how confusing and frustrating that is?
And what's even harder, is that some people who are like me find it very difficult or sometimes impossible to be passionate or ambitious about something, because we either simply get bored after it gets uninteresting, or become too obsessive over how perfect it needs to be
And it gets very overwhelming having to be torn between polar opposite traits of my personality. Having the ability to understand and sympathize with many people to the point of being worn down by their concerns and feeling but never being understood myself makes it even more overwhelming
Edit: would any of you find it ironic that this long rant was written by a 15 year old? 🙃🙃
Exactly what I wanna say but often when we try to tell these things to others no one cares to listen in the end I just keep these kind of thoughts to myself thinking that maybe I am bothering someone and it's only me being weird🥺🥺
@@agampreetkaur4523 exactly. It's very difficult to find someone who'd listen to us and understand us instead of calling us weird and indecisive. One of the main reasons why we like to keep to ourselves is if we attempt to talk to someone about our real selves. They never understand
This is facts,
especially the creative project part and ambition
😳😳😳😳😳😳🤯 wow. .. I just didnt realize how identical two complete strangers could be.. that is incredible
I can realate to that its true because you want to tell someone how you fell but than your think you are going to brother him/her and than you tell yourself you shouldnt tell it and keep everything to yourself isnt easy because after a time your going to burnout
As an INFJ, I wouldn't wish this personality on anyone. It's kinda lonely.
it really is. i felt before that it's both a blessing and a curse, but everything has its own ups and downs.
I wish I had a friend who is INFJ. Maybe then I could put up with life.
Hey there’s all infj’s here! But I agree, I don’t think I’ve ever met an infj and now that I think about it I’ve always felt something off about all the friends I do have
@@elchin5805 same. I was quite, well how do I put it, dissatisfied when I saw that an INFJ was one of the rarest personality types. It made sense too. Recently I’ve been feeling lonelier than ever, without having one friend with common interests 🙁 I hope one day I meet a person who is like me and we can be the bestest of friends 🙂🌱
@@nissachavez23 Never let your personality type upset you mate because we're blessed to have this personality. It's the rarest type and that's what makes us unique individuals of this world.
Being misunderstood is my biggest fear as an infj. And then I make up all these conversations in my head trying to clear the misunderstanding, but never really clear them irl
INFJ is like O negative we can give help to everyone but we can't help ourselves
oh god i am O Negative blood also..
I am an empath, INFJ and O positive lol
@@itsmeemilia88 lol that is funny for me
Was seriously going to post this
That's not quite true. O negative types can take O negative blood. 🤷♀️
The one thing INFJ’s fears the most is failure and I hate failing
Oh my God I agree it's such a hell pit that I can't climb back😭
This is so true,it's like, io have a high expectations in an exam that I study so much time and it's easy for me but then I do it so much worse, thinking that I do it great but no,I hate that...
I'd say I probably most fear getting to deep in over my head and not being able to dig myself out ... So I guess commitment issues and thusly everything has to be perfect before I commit ... Anyways, keep on keeping on infj friend
True. But at the same time, i also feel like i shouldnt care. There are times when im anxious about something and that anxiety will disappear randomly and i brush it up as if im overreacting or i forgot about it.
My whole body tightens and my feet and hands start sweating 💀
Being an INFJ is hard because it feels like a constant mental showdown between anxiety and fear of failure but also wanting deep, emotional relationships. It's like a struggle of being introverted but wanting the benefits of extroversion... if that makes sense.
It's like you want to have friends but dont know if they will understand you
In a nutshell, we have friends, but we can't make real connections whit them. Is hard af to show how we feel, because we know nobody is going to understand us.
It makes totally sense man. Man i just figured out im infj and i am now seeing it all clearly and yet i dont know what to do with myself.
That makes complete sense
Ohh exactly , you said exactly the same , I am also infj-t
I'm really glad that as an INFJ, I try to improve my character and slowly get rid of my flaws instead of pretending they just don't exist. Of course, it's very hard to completely get rid of your flaws but every time I lessen the extremeness of my flaws I feel much better than I did before and much more proud of myself! I've actually only recently become aware of my inability to accept changes and I'm currently working on becoming more open to changes so wish me luck! :D
Luck darling!!!
@@milkrice8508 Thank you!
Good luck. I never saw these traits in me, but then I got into a relationship and now I do lmfaoooo. Really hard for me to truly recognize and change these things because I feel like everything I do makes sense, but I know I'm most likely just in denial.
@@shamstam Exactlyy, sometimes me thinking that everything I do makes sense in turn makes me think what if everyone's just smart and I'm the dumb one. I'm just in denial really. I can relate so hard, being aware of the stuff is easy but actually seriously acknowledging that stuff and wanting to change is hard.
Im happy for you, the changues that are happening to me... well I just dont like them
As an INFJ i don’t know if i should be proud of the fact “INFJ the world’s rarest personality” or the fact that it is really a struggle at some point
Either way, you are probably intolerable.
I Start drinking and drugs early in my life becase of that intens Feeling of lonlyness
@@flo-.-9148 I hope you are in a better place now in life
ur not alone
Finding out I was "rare" was more of a epiphany for me than a source of Pride.
It made everything else make more sense; why I felt like no one understood me, why I couldn't find people who I truly connected with, and why I felt like an Alien sent down to observe the Earthlings.
Luckily I've found some IRL friends (3) who have the same type, and who I can commiserate with now. x)
I lowkey hate being an infj, I easily get hurt and find it hard to socialize with everyone.
From an outsiders perspective (INTP) with an INFJ sister: We dont really like each other that much because I know how manipulative she can be and we can see right through each other which creates this passive agressive sphere. She literally says stuff like "Dont tell them this or I will tell them your darkest secrets you didnt know I know about". So I'd say interactions like that and me not knowing how to handle that broke our trust in each other. Not sure if this is relevant to your comment but Id thought id share it anyways.
@@simianto9957 Oh, thats okay. As an infj, i think she doesnt want to be open about those things she doesnt want anyone to know because most of us are shy, but its still bad that she tries to manipulate you. I think you both should communicate more and understand each other :)
@@jds1110 Yeah I also think we should communicate more. I see her around 1,5 hours a day and then we talk for what, 10 minutes?
Believe me I can relate to what you just said so completely I mean wow I'm still processing this because. I just I'm 62 years old and it's taking me this long to find something out wow I've been in and out of therapy since I was 24 years old I don't know I would think that maybe I would have..... I mean I'm not 100% sure but I am pretty sure that cuz I have most of the traits I am like seven out of eight of the positive ones in the negative ones I mean I just I just stopped it because there was something the most homework after that damn that's all end up getting caught up in all these crazy situations helping people and end up like you said getting hurt thank you for your input
Same. I feel you
if you're wondering why there are so many infj's online when we're the rarest personality type, my theory is that we just prefer to socialize like this lol
Definitely, you don't see there reaction to what you say which is something I worry about, and you can just say stuff easier online in general ig
exactly, and of course we will all gravitate to videos that talk about being an infj as we’re trying to understand ourselves!
True, I really hate socialising. And hate is a strong word.
I am absurd
Yup
As an INFJ I found these relatable, though some were more relatable than others. I especially related to the bottling up emotions, and pushing people away.
Okay but being an INFJ feels like a living hell just because of how contradicting your thoughts are. Really makes you question who you are and every choice you make that it feels like you're going crazy. To all my fellow INFJs out there. We will make it through! Keep your head up!
frr, and thankss same to youu
Ha, this is way too relatable
ikr and yes!
very importent to find friends and family that make you get out of your own head. That's what i've found anyway.
Thank You!! I really need that😔
The hardest thing about an INFJ is understanding everyone else and their issues but you're never able to discover yourself or find your own solutions..
Yes,and feeling helpless
Well the key to understanding yourself is gone curious of yourself. Ask yourself questions as to like why am I feeling this or what is this? It's not impossible to discover yourself... You will be a lot stronger for it once you reach the depths of yourself
And no one helps you to do so as you have helped them to.
Bro you just described my entire existence...
Im an INTP with an INFJ sister. But like damn because we know each other so well she shows her manipulative side very often and I dó understand her which doesnt make things better because we see through each other like glass. She literally manipulates me by saying stuff like "Dont tell them this or I will tell them your darkest secrets you dont even know I know about
"you cut out people out of your life abruptly"
I have never feel so called out like this
bruh same
Facts....
Samee
Uhm, I feel attacked
Same
I'm an INFJ and i realated to every single things you said and the hardest part of being INFJ is that i can't find someone who is just like me that's why i always end up alone my expectations are very high , I want other to treat me care for me just like I do for them and that's why i always gets disappointed
I hate it dude, I can’t even maintain friendships because I’m always emotionally and mentally exhausted. People won’t ever get it.
Same, like there was this time more than one ppl wants to talk to me about something and i try to talk to them all at once.
I fell asleep in class afterwards
Same. Only relationship I can keep going with is with my husband. Something about having that intense deeper relationship keeps it in lock. Just like with my children. They're mine & we share a life together, so I am bonded with them. I am also close with certain family members..but cannot fully open up to anyone else who makes me uncomfortable. If I cannot trust someone, I pull away. I'm not even close with my own mother and my siblings only know half of me I want to show them. It's difficult. I've learned as I've gotten older to FORCE myself to change. To be authentic, to calm down, let things roll off my back, and trust that most people aren't out to get me and that they have their own trauma to deal with. It helps a lot.
Same, its even more harder when you are an INFJ, have social anxiety, are a perfectionist and bottle up your emotions to the extreme
Healthy boundaries
At his point, I'm a complete loner 😌. I like it.
Being an infj isn’t that special- it just feels like I’m weirder than everyone else
ngl i didnt think so many people would actually respond i kinda feel better ig
Me 2...infjs are lost souls just trying fit in
@@Alexandra-hg9pz that’s pretty dumb. Not you, but the circumstance. why did they find that out anyways? It doesn’t change anything at all, you’re literally the same person with a new label
Yeah, and even if it’s “rare” one can clearly see everybody in these comments who is an infj is completely different
@@fadedsophomore óh I felt that.🙈
Me too, so it means we’re not that special after all I guess.💀
As an INFJ, I’d say my biggest weakness is that I become too loyal to people I’m close to, and then it’ll become impossible to make any other connections ;-;
Sounds like an emotional laziness run amok.
me feels you
And then when you cut tie someone, you never gain another friend to replace them 😔
Me too :/
its true
INFJ here, and can relate to ALL of the points you brought up. It's a work in progress to work on these toxic traits, but it's the only way I know how to live. It'll be hard to re-wire my brain into acting/being different
I don't know why everyone thinks being an INFJ is great coz it's rare
It's not easy to be an INFJ, I wish I had a different personality tbh
We try to understand everyone, but we ourselves are so complicated that others fail to understand us.
We want to socialize but are extroverted only toward family and close friends or sometimes not towards them either coz our moods really fluctuate
We never even realize when we start moving away from people in a lonely corner
I keep really high expectations of myself, coz I don't wanna disappoint anyone
Most of the time when I'm down or going through something, I mostly cry alone, I don't have a shoulder, rather I don't want one coz I don't wanna put my problems on others
As much as I like to laugh and smile, I like to stay alone...
My fellow INFJs, we know this is relatable, but I'm sure there's always a way to be happy and live a better life. Let's try to change ourselves for the better, of course, we can't change our personality but we can definitely change our habits, right?
I hope everyone is doing well. BIG HUGS!!
Edit: Thank you for the likes and replies, hopefully, we can share our problems and find those people in our life who will understand us.
Once again let's change for the better.
Loads and loads of Love, Support, hope and best wishes
It's very much relatable. I have typed INFJ on several tests, including in school. I also have learned about the types, really analysed it. Sometimes I relate to other types but INFJ is how my mind ticks.
These problems are tough ones and i too deal with them. However, with those you are more open to, if you have managed to find someone you trust, tell them. I hate being negative and talking about my issues as I worry I make other's feel down, especially when my mam has accused me of making her upset because she saw me cry. That situation made me feel so guilty and upset.
HOWEVER, it is still important to talk about your feelings. Even if you don't understand them, and are so overwhelmed that you can't explain properly, and need to think, just let people know. I tell my boyfriend when I'm upset because he asked me to. It really helps, and I always tell him to let me know if anything ever bothers him. It's no burden to me.
It's ok not to live up to expectations. I have really struggled this year with my work, but I have learned that being good at things is not always your best. Sometimes your best is just ok. And that's ok :) be kind as you are to others :)
I have no solution for the one about cutting ties. I am bad at keeping in contact because I often focus on very close relationships, such as my family and boyfriend. I really try to remember to reach out to friends, but I have let go of many. I feel no loss in less interaction, but certainly guilt, because I never really stop caring about people. I forgive quickly, unless I am hurt repeatedly, then I turn cold. The 'door slam' is what that would be I suppose 😅
Also my boyfriend didn't think I was introverted because I am so open to him, but the opposite with others haha 😂 But I am actually probably more easily over stimulated and socially drained than he is 😂
Hugs :)
You have no idea how much this comment spoke to me. You described how I feel in a way I could never. I'm really bad at explaining how I feel. Sending love
@@amziedragon6619 Exactly, my goal is to find a girlfriend like your boyfriend who understands us.
Extremely relatable but for me I've just given up hope that's I'll find someone who'll understand... I just feel like I'll end up being disappointed as usual if I do :(
@@amziedragon6619 Thank you so much, for the advice
Honestly I just feel like I’m crazy. I understand everything yet nothing, feel dumb yet the smartest person on the planet. I am extremely hard on myself and yet get cocky with things every once in awhile. So yeah, I feel insane.
Perfectly articulated.
This is so true to me as well. Feels nice knowing theres others like this out there lol
Well said, thank you
Damn, accurate
😭😭😭😭😭THIS IS ACCURATE
Tbh being an infj is not at all that special as people like to exaggerate it, we are just messed up people trying to live our lives through this hell hole of our super intuitive inner side and a natural habit of overthinking with tons of trust issues everyday, just wanna give a hug to all my fellow infj's out there, you are a fighter!
Omg I didn't expected this to blow up....thank you so much for the back hugs! Love you fellow INFJ's
And again, not all INFJ's are like that too...yeah some may have been successful to overcome their weaknesses which I'm trying to do too, that's the way human beings evolve and become stronger, but that doesn't mean that an infj can't overcome all this, it takes time and experience to control these traits and use them for our own benefit
I super agree
❤️👍✌️
Perfectly said. Thank you
Can't disagree with you
Yess
I recently performed the test and discovered that I'm an INFJ, and now I have answers to most of my questions that were never answered by anyone else. The most shocking part is the thoughts that I mostly get dissolved about others that allow me to understand them in a better way but I ain't have words to explain mine.
being one of the rarest personality type doesn’t always mean positive aspects. it also includes the fact that finding another INFJ is almost impossible and not even yourself can understand your emotions. overall it sucks.
sending love to all my fellow INFJ’s!
I feel this! I always long desperately to find other INFJs and that it's almost impossible to fulfill this wish sometimes feels so unbearable to me.
My brother is INFJ too, but I still can't understand my emotions. I don't feel like we're the same at all...
Once you start cutting out the people who don't even try to get you and start being more open about your INFJ ass, other INFJs will come along. When I came across the test, I sent a link to many of my friends out of curiosity. And in my inner circle were 3 other INFJs and some pretty close personality types. But they are also hard to handle sometimes - just like me. We need a LOT of acceptance on and from various levels.
Thanks dude hope running doin well too💖😅🤗
@@SnowWhite1099 sameee!! finally found a lot here
I'm a little scared at how much this is accurate for me
Take the test becuse these traits are pretty common
If you related to this, we would make good friends. 😂
I'm a little scared as well because this is accurate 100% for me too.. I understand how you feel.
I'm scared more because l am from Russia. What?
it is accurate but i always thought those traits were just cause of my autism depression adhd and anxiety
First basic thing about us INFJ's,is that our thoughts are so deep that others cant reach and understand us,the real and deep us
Fr I deadass went full philosophical on the quote, “ever wonder why were here?” From red vs blue in gym class today. Ps if you don’t know what that is or haven’t watched it then you should.
@@Someguy028 i can discuss that
-ENTP lmao
@@Someguy028 BRUHH-- LITERALLY- I FEEL DEPRIVED OF A GOOD CONVERSATION. like god, he could just be made up, by some old greedy man, the whole idea of the world, the universe is irrelevant, we are gonna die, but I still wanna know, like what if aliens are controlling us, deadass, what if we are being controlled by people outside of us, like we are a game and this is some stupid roleplay to them.
@@youllneverknow3585 you ever wake up and feel like you just hopped back in the game?
@@cosmic9arrow I thought of this in multiple different ways. Whenever I get up to play my ps4 everyday(I'm grounded now tho) and or waking up, getting on the bus, and continuing. If that's what you mean then most definitely yes)'-'(
I am deffinetly a INFJ. In all my freindships i am the one person whos always open and always listens and tries to help. I love to help people feel good about them self while I am secretly suffering. I have many, many hardships in life. I try to hide my emotions even though I need help, I dont want people to worry about me. I try to tell myself I am cool and are helping not hurting, I have increadably low self esteem. I never feel confident and are constantly worrying about what people think of me even ifs the way I eat or the way I look. When i grow up i want be a counselor and wnt to help all the people with mental problems. I hope one day I can change the world. this channle has helped me out. it has helped me figure out I have secret annxoity and secretly hate myself. thank you for all the advice and facts. :)
No one:
Literally no one:
Me as an infj: overthinking about being an overthinker
So true! This is really sad. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣💔
SAME OML DX
I also overthink a lot. Quite unhealthy if I do say so myself...
@@sophiaisabelle027 I think the best way to overcome it is to focus on the moment and be aware of the people and things around us...good luck everyone 🧡💙🌏
@@yusra9428 thanks for the advice :)
As a INFJ, I worry about my heart. I literally give myself headaches
Me too, sometimes I can't sleep because I become aware of my heartbeat
Same.
Me too
same
omg same lol
For me, the hardest part of being a INFJ is trying to match everyone's energy when I'm with them, to the point I don't know who's the real me without feeling like I'm just pretending
Edit: To everyone that liked and replied, let’s all gather together and give each other a hug, we really need it
Same😪
Yeah I also feel so left out.
This
!!!! yes ong
Exactly what I’m struggling with
As an INFJ, I always see deeper meaning in everything. Because of that, I tend to over analyze people being nice to me and think they actually have an entire scheme behind it. I have extreme trust issues.
The hardest thing about being and INFJ is our ability to see through people and understand them and yet none of the other personalities can understand us INFJ. I guess it's how it is for the personalities to be balanced well.
@@shravyathakkellapati7276 exactly it gets really frustrating sometimes
This is just me but I feel as though it is situational for the other personalities for example I am a infp yet I am a lot less open which leads to hardly anyone caring/trying to care. While infj’s May get it the most it can happen to other people as well
Yeah, especially when you can basically HEAR the person's thoughts and cut them off in conversation because you know them that well. You never mean to make them feel like you don't care or you think they're predictable you just wanna engage in the conversation because you're interested
Mm. As an INFJ, I for one can always see when you're compulsively lying, but I leave it alone because maybe you'll be happy of I do, or of you have a bad day, or need a hug. But people never see through the stupid lies I tell so it's like they don't know me, they believe me when I say my days' been great, and never am I offered a hug. It's okay tho, I know other have it worse. Lmao just wanted to vent
True, I always cried for that reason
Pros of being a INFJ: you get to constantly be with your best friend, you!
Cons of being an INFJ: your only friend is your best friend.
thats not a trait exclusive to infj’s youre just lonely lol
@@insignificant. thats so "i typed myself based on dumb stereotypes and not the cognitive functions"
Aww so true
INFJs can have friends, actually... often very good friends. It's possible that you haven't met anyone who takes the trouble to understand you properly yet, though. Try to be open to it and you'll hopefully get there, and in the meantime just... try not to overthink it, either. A good criteria for a potential friend is "Does this person truly care about other people?" ^_^
oof, as an INFJ, that does hit hard, but, ofc we do have friends, but just a few of them, and whoever they are have a REEEEEEEALLY close bonds w/ them. So in my perspective, quality is better than quantity.
This made me feel so much better after knowing tons of people go through the same thing and that people understand. This is one thing I would never be able to express in my own words. ❤
All these are so true, and honestly I don't know why people "deeply crave to be INFJ" to feel "cool and special" when in fact, you as an INFJ don't feel special at all but instead you spend your time overthinking and trying to figure out what the hell is wrong with you for being the way you are and then realizing you're doomed for life if you don't try to change yourself and the traits of your own freaking personality. It's a struggle.
yess ikrrr
IKRRRR
Omg yeah
It’s like +10 difficulty sum times😂
All true...
There are a lot of INFJ's online because we are searching the internet to try to understand ourselves. However, even after all this time, I still don't understand myself...
Yeah me to
Omg how do you know what i do? HAHA honestly is so cool to realize you're not the only one that feels this way
;(
Me either.
So True
There's an INFJ quote I like: There's fire in him. If loved correctly he will warm your entire home. If abused, he will burn it down
Kinda reminds me of another quote someone said:
"Sex is like fire, inside fireplace (marriage) it will warm up your home, anywhere else and it will burn the entire place down".
So don't play with fire :)
@@REplayer001 yes because if you are a male thats just looking to "play with fire" for fun, but if you get her pregnant-
@@yungfelix5079 meaning sex is not only skin deep thing it connects souls of people so you have to be very careful while doing it, if you do it properly in the right context as it was intend then it can be a great thing, but if you are reckless with sex you can get into all kinds of trouble both emotional and physical, you shouldn't play around with it. It affects both parties.
@@REplayer001 exactly
This is an interesting thread.
This is a good and fairly accurate video. I'm an INFJ-T. A few things though: I don't tend to lash out, I usually bottle it up and tell them it's fine when they've wronged me, but I may distance myself from them for a bit. I don't really cut anyone out of my life, but when things start to get overwhelming, I put some distance between us for a time. I still try to offer help, but I'm less available. I just feel like I need time to sort through things. The high expectations is an interesting one. While I'm generally a perfectionist, I don't hold those same expectations for others. As long as people try, I'm happy with that. Everything else was spot on! Thank you for the video!
To be clear
alot of people bottle up thier emotions , that doesnt make you infj , the real infj is when you listen to almost everyone and care about their emotions while you cannot do the same yourself , you can never trust anyone to open up to ,
also this makes you wanna be away from everyone as much as possible bc if you know people then that means you have to listen without being listened to.
Then thats definitely me. lol
And I have this thing that I can't stop doing😔cut relationship with friend because of disappointment, I have high expectations with people and I hate that.
After a long time of bottling up, i apparently started trusting my close ppl a lil n opened upto them (they are only 2ppl🙂)
@@amruthavalli1260 glad you did that
this is a perfect description, i really want to open up but at the same time it terrifies me
2% are still around like 150 million right? So you’re not alone
The correct INFJ population Is
237 000 000(hundred millions)
Very much not alone. I think we complain too much sometimes.
that makes me feel so much better
That's really putting it into perspective 😄
I’m happy to see there is always people to understand you and you’re never alone, it’s really underwhelming and I love this community, not just INJF, also others who tried to understand us, so grateful x)
As an INFJ i have to say i feel a little bit insane. Like i just don't fit in and i've been trying my whole life to 'come up with a personality, or show a side of me' that others will like. And now, i'm having an identity crisis because i just don't know who am i. I feel like i'll never find someone who understands me and value my traits, like truly. So, it's not fun being an INFJ, cuz i have to please myself when i'm alone, but i also feel the need to please others when i feel like going out and socialize. And even tho i know this is not good, i just don't know what to do about it.
I thought INFJs bottled up their emotions
i read this and all i could think was, same girl, same. just exactly same. its rather fascinating how there are actually people like me, because most of the time i feel like NO ONE is (which is usual but, i feel it ig more extreme.)
a few months ago i came to realise im a misfit. a label cant work for me. a style. an aesthetic. so i try to just do what feels good, and don't care too much about, anything whatsoever
Showing a side that others will like & feeling the need to please others. That's high Fe, which isn't always fun.
You don't need others to like you. Just be kind to people and you don't have to go through an identity crisis cause whatever you do or how you are like it's you. So, don't be afraid of welcoming the new you and just go at it cause it's you.
Don't do anything about it. Stop trying to be somebody else, be yourself. The only thing you can do to improve yourself is listen. People will tell you and if it don't that's their problem.
I relate to all of these - especially in my younger years - when my boundaries were shit. As I got older, I started to chill out, let go, and develop healthier boundaries.
Test: you are an INFJ
Friend: you are an INFJ
Parents: you are an INFJ
Heart: you are an INFJ
God: you are an INFJ
Brain: let’s take the test again for the tenth time just to make sure...
Yeah, there's always that small doubt in some corner. " what if..... it's not what it seems? Let's do it again just one more time" . Trying to chase and CATCH that " 100% " assurance and satisfaction really drives one crazy xD
Or when you don't feel worthy of the "rarest personality" title
Bro this is internally me
@@rebelagainsttheblues is it really the rarest? I thought there was another one, I don’t feel that special
Yes
I think the hardest thing about INFJs is we want answers and facts and perfection. But, we are artist and musicians and writers, and we are good at it. But a lot of the time we do not like these activities we are good at because we become obsessive and controlling and want it to be perfect but no matter how hard we try it will never be perfect to us. We are the type A yet left brain people. It is frustrating. You can tell us all you want how amazing we are at something but only we can decide for ourselves whether we’re good at it. Don’t try to change our minds, we do not trust your word because we know opinions are not facts. And we want facts.
Ouch! That hurts alot 😔...
This comment is the reason why I quitted my precious theater activity and why I don't get 9+ anymore at my english exams...
@@egoistagatto7942 why so?
@@user-nt4ls7ri7o because everytime I want to do something my way, I never fully reach my goal even if the others love what I do
@@egoistagatto7942 I've though about what you said for a while, and I can see that I had the same situation like these where I give up on something or a project just because I didn't reach the perfection I wanted or *was it the perfection you believe they wanted?* Think about! We INFJs do things while considering many perspectives and opinions, for a simple example, an INFJ author ,who writes novels, would prefer to focus on adding events that would catch most attention and favoritty rather than putting his unique ideas, that's why they'll be obssessive whether what they made is "perfect" in any readers' eyes! Just like a fact that none can deny easily!
So in conclusion, you loved your theatre activity cuz you found yourself filled with ideas and passion for it, but because you pressured yourself with others' perspectives when someone is not satisfied with your results, you as well become the same while not noticing.
(Pls correct me if I misunderstood you! And sorry for my bad grammar 😅✋I hope I helped you see and understand the situation more clear )
1. bottling up negative emotions 1:16
2. abruptly cutting people out of their lives 1:53
3. extremely high expectations 2:31
4. moodiness 3:04
5. self-destructive 3:34
6. stubbornness 4:13
I hope I could help! (: -INFJ
Ayyyy, the famous time traveller cat, thank you :)
Thank you! I have no idea how but thank you!
XD guess I’m not early lol
Hey, that's me. 100%
Sounds accurate to myself
I go between an ENFJ/INFJ. I feel like this video helped me realize the duality that is displayed in my personality. I have been described by others throughout my life as “bossy” yet “quiet” and “friendly” yet “mean”. I realize this is likely because I am highly sensitive and absorb everything around me on top of already having my own things to worry about, so when I am overstimulated, I tend to lash out or become bitter although generally that is not how I am. I am usually bubbly and friendly and I have learned to openly express my feelings (part of my E), so I can see how this duality could confuse other people. I love spending time with others while also having my own time so my feelings are always contradicting, but I am getting better at knowing when I need to step away and who to avoid to keep my own peace and thus maintain positive relationships around me. Reading the comments, this duality seems to be the case for many others too, so it is nice to hear others’ experiences as well.
INFJs are literally walking contradictions. As human beings we are social creatures yet we dislike social interaction most of the time. We are super emotional and really deep thinkers yet we fake a persona to fit in. We are artists and desire to create, yet it all has to be done by our own specific processes. We desire for every one around us to be happy and feel free while we live in our self created pain. We are are actually quite black in white in how we feel, yet we hardly have a straight answer for what we’re thinking.
Yes I always feel like I have an extreme personality, I can be cruel, cold but also I can be kind and warm. I would neglect everything when I don’t want to feel anything but also thought about things so deeply.
Why is this so accurate
istg this is me in a nutshell
Thank u for this
@@blablible7156 😳 This is exactly like me~
ngl i started crying when i read the INFJ description on the myers briggs test. it felt like for the first time in my life someone understood how i felt.... i’m too uncomfortable to talk to even my closest friends about something that’s even remotely personal to me
Ure not alone! x)
Same here, I can't even talk out my situations with my best friend
And just appear to be fine
Same here .
Same here sis I felt the same 🥺
same. nothing made sense before until i read the result
This was 5 minutes and 12 seconds of me being called out
I'm in this video, and I don't appreciate it XD DX
Same
Haha also same! But very encouraging all the same. I'd taken Myers-Briggs tests a few times and initially got INFJ but thought "No that can't be right if it's so rare..." but this video really confirms a lot of issues I've been noticing about myself or suspecting. Helps to know what my weaknesses are so I can work on them!
@@Emarella you are special! Never think otherwise about yourself
XD me too😂🙏
I am married to an INFJ, and have a sister that is an INFJ as well. They often expect the rest of us to know what is happening inside of them without actually communicating what is happening inside of them. My mantra is “we cannot read your mind”.
Being an INFJ...we always live in our own world and expect this world to be the same, I find very difficult to adjust myself to new things and we pressurize ourself mentally alot. It's very difficult to make yourself fit into normal things that this entire world does. N one more thing, we are not that good at finding a true friend because we don't trust anyone easily (in my case it's like this). So, being an INFJ is very exhausting cuz we are rare and we don't fit in with everyone. This is what think in my case. (Like if u r an INFJ).
True
So true and it's really hard for me to control my emotions. So I got used to hiding them and that's actually counterproductive TT
So true, that's happened to me too.
true true. eventually it gets very lonely and then you’re dealing with yourself and yourself only it sucks
That's so so true... It's mentally exhausting to be an INFJ :(
As an INFJ, I take everything to heart without showing it (I tend to be overemotional, but only in my head if that makes sense). Every little criticism I receive is a big deal to me even if it wasn't meant to be and I end up doing everything I can to fix it because it's in my nature to try to be "perfect" even though perfect is unachievable... Being INFJ is so complex and exhausting, I wish I could not care as much of what others think!!
You will learn to not care too much about what other people think as you experience more of life.
True :')
Same
Yes! I've had people tell me I take criticism very well, calm and learn from it but inside I'm saying don't cry, don't cry!
This is true, with text messages after someone sends a message it ends up taking me over an hour just to write it, because I worry so much about how it would impact the other person, when it's just a simple text message. It's quite exhausing.
i feel like being an INFJ is hard because you're always giving yourself to others when they need someone, but you don't realize you're the one that needs support the most. you dont realize it because you're busy being everyone else's support and it starts to drain your energy so you hide away, shut down and recharge. if that makes sense.
That's not always the case. Being someone else's support isn't always tiring for INFJ's. In fact, they don't have many opportunities to be there for someone (emotionally) because our society is growing more and more private. It's more like they want to be the support.
I can totally relate to this
I Relate
i can relate
@@se1kura928 I would say it is like wanting to be the support until you realize someone just contacts you for the sole reason to be the threapist again and not for the fun stuff anymore. It's like...helping gives me energy back until it get's into this kind of pattern and suddenly it drain's energy every time i see they try to contact me.
My best friend is very outgoing and dramatic, but helping them gives me always energy back, we have a good time and still laugh a lot. The people that share their problems and go right afterwards are...tirying on the other hand
since i was a kid i struggled explaining my own thoughts and emotions to others and thats made me feel diffrent from anyone i know...but now every thing is clear in just built different.
Being an INFJ practically requires you to be an optimistic pessimist.
t. an INFJ
i was starting to think it was just me 😂
So literally a bloomer. You know the world is shit and know shit will keep happening to you, yet you still try to be happy anyways.
I'm a INFJ and I just call myself a realist. Most people see that as pessimism sometimes, when in reality it's just being honest with yourself.
You just described me lol
Nail on the head!
Biggest tip I can give to fellow INFJs is to remember that you can’t save everyone and you can’t help someone who won’t help themselves. Also go out and meet tons of people, it’s uncomfortable but that’s how you find those people you make really close relationships with
Thank you soooo much! God bless!
Sure as heck feels that way....
ENFP here, can’t we at least make an effort to help there people?
Excellent advice!
Thank you
It's terrifying how relatable all of this is... Including the comment section
Hugs to all my fellow INFJs :]
Thank you. Sending you a hug back. I hope that you will take some time for yourself and be kind to yourself 'cause as an INFJ I know how we can beat ourselves up and keep having negative thoughts. That's literally what I'm going through and I don't want anyone else to go through it.
thanks :D
Huggies!!!!! I love hugs :)
*return hug*
This is the funniest thing to me right now after connecting with this stuff. I thought I was nuts for a minute. Happy to find out that it’s just my personality trait. Took me 15mins to go through a huge roller coaster of emotions. Best RUclips account around. Obviously this isn’t proven but man I believe it could be fact. This is the first time I’m hearing these studies of tendencies and it’s so relatable for me.
This is so true to me. I see everything in perspective especially when it's presented like this. Always have been keeping things to myself thinking that nobody will ever understand me. And I think I find that easier than having to explain myself further too and be vulnerable.
Being an INFJ can be so mentally exhausting that you need those alone moments to refuel and find what makes you feel alive.
I need to be completely left alone at least 3 times a week otherwise I don't cope! My nightmare would be a large group holiday with no chance to be alone or the Big Brother house! I'd lock myself in the toilet for a good hour to just sit alone and pretend I'm constipated haha
@@Becky-vb8fs I relate to this so much! 😭
...and that is the reason why I will never try relationships. Practically all people I know who are in relationships, every single bit of "alone/refuel" time gets completely shoved out, which would bug the living shit out of me. Because you know, if someone is needing alone time, then that person MUST be hiding something (aka BS drama which I also intently hate).
@@gamr13th for me, my girlfriend BECAME the alone time. if i ever felt like relaxing or just refueling i'd go and talk to her. don't be like me. we broke up and now i can't function.
@@Becky-vb8fs I also relate to this. This last month I spent my time with a lot of people and don't get me wrong, I had a great time. But coming home I didn't have any source of energy in me. As an INFJ, I notice we tend to need our personal space from time to time :")
I'm an INFJ, and most days, my psyche feels like a punching bag.
What people think about INFJs:
- This is the best personality since it is the most rare
- The think/say we are *unique*
What we think: what does he/she mean by unique? In the good way or in the wrong way? Why am I questioning this tho? This is not overthinking right? Hold on, am I overthinking about overthinking?
It so okay...i think so too
You are not alone.im with you
What in my mind:
Is it okay?i say that.ugh
Relatable
I need an answer for everything, especially about myself because even I get confused with myself lol
I've taken countless online tests about almost everything about me, be it my eye colour, or my romantic type, or even a mental illness (I'm through that phase) I just get really wound up if it's unclear. I used to repeatedly ask my friends what job I'd be good at, what am I good at etc and I find it annoying too
@@georgememmott4398 ok wtf that is so me i look up everything having to do with me whether it's personality or health related and it's been almost two years and I haven't been able to decide if i really want to stick with my current undergrad course lol fml
I don’t want to be rare :( bc an infj so Its like this feeling of overthinking and 3:52 thingy?? I DONT KNOW HOW TO DESCRIBE IT and you feel what other ppl might be feeling but other ppl are clueless of how u feel ahh:’)
But yeah I agree what u said
I've known I was INFJ-T for a while now, taken the test multiple times and gotten the same result each time. Never realized how much of my actions were on account of my personality type. I'm a perfectionist but huge procrastinator, I've always known I'm incredibly intelligent but never put forth the work (been told by almost all teachers over the years), and I try to help all my friends through their problems expecting nothing in return but satisfaction knowing I did good, want to socialize and be quick and witty like other people but my brain has to sit and think of the perfect response instead of speaking my mind. Love these videos from y'all, definitely been a big help on my journey to finding myself, so thank you.
Pro tip: INFJ cares about Myers-Brigg tests more than others
Can you tell me where I can take it?
@@shhhh133 there’s a website called 16 personalities which is actually pretty good.
Genuine. I asked my parents to try it after finding out I was a INFJ type. They are completely against it, however I find it extremely interesting.
@@amethystlake maybe because we at last can understand ourselves and think others want that too?
@@TheKatylala It isn't, it's just something inaccurate.. if you want something more serious take the keys2cognition test
Negative side of INFJ: 1) bottled up emotions
Me: Well that's escalated quickly and accurately
Yep
I feel personally attacked 😂
my worst problem
yeah. And when I say I'm fine, I usually trick ppl into thinking I am. I don't want people to see what's really going on, it's embarrassing & I hate it, hate it hate it! And this is why I can never get help. Therapy, Counseling? No, because I don't want anybody to know. I don't want to talk to anybody about this. Not even a stranger. People are too judgemental, I'm scared that someone is going to judge me.
😀 and someone will 😆
@@choi4391 This is why we dying in the RUclips comment section
INFJ: Sometimes tired of being an INFJ
Also INFJ: But I still love it.
I am INFJ but i wanted to be ENFP because Robert Downey jr. was ENFP
Embracing the dark side can get too comfortable, huh?
Same here
Took the personality test and was told I was INFJ in 2012 but it makes sense I don’t like labeling myself we are all unique as individuals no matter what you are
After a point, I've just stopped expecting anything from anyone, because I know I have high standards that no one will bother meeting. I'm a definition of "disappointed but not surprised"
Same
Same here ... ive realized that same thing over time.
It's better this way...
Too true.
Holy shit I can’t
As an INFJ i hate when people hurt me but when it comes to me I can't hurt them i feel very bad 💔
Same here... That just doesn't feel right deep in my mind... But I don't know why?
Yeah same here like I bottle up the emotion and literally cannot get angry at them it’s like my mind doesn’t allow it.
And is there feeling why they dont feel like this when they hurt?
I try to hurt them back but it just don't work
Yeah, I often keep my thoughts back just to don't hurt other people but in the same time they run all over me being ignorant and egoistic
1. bottling up negative emotions
2. Abruptly cutting people out of their lives
3. Extremely high expectations
4. Moodiness
5. Self destructive
6. Stubbornness
Guys, we are still making it cheers to us!
I really relate to the last one change is a big fear I have because when smt changes it’s never good
As an INFJ, our hearts are always at stress. I'm afraid we will die from heart attack for hiding all of these emotions inside. I've always wanted to be understood but ended up misunderstood esp by my parents *sigh*.
I’m also afraid that might happen too me
Exactly, I've also felt misunderstood since I was a child, but at least we know who we are. Sending good vibes ✨
Sad part about being INFJ is we can't get back the care and love we give others and we start feeling worthless because of it.
hahahah true, my friends told me I would not live long, from heart attack of course😅😅
don't mention it. I sometimes feel that I'm 23 years old and I've spent most of all these years with my mother and siblings but they still don't understand me. In fact, it's like they don't even know me
1. Bottling up emotions, makes me really ill.
2. I have cut so many people out of my life including my real father.
3. I'm told I'm very moody
5. Very self destructive and ALWAYS overthink
6. Very stubborn
Totally me
am I looking into a mirror
frrr
6, bad listeners and want to give advice upfront to make yourself feel better xx
number 5 is literally killing me
I had a doubt that am I really an infj... But after watched this, Iam 100% sure...😶
being INFJ always makes me think that I don’t belong here, I don’t belong in this world, I’m weird, some kind of things😭
As a fellow INFJ, while I do agree with you, at the same time I need to say that we all have a place here.
I have felt this and the frustration it brought is overwhelming. We exist with you, Soleil. I hope we find "our people" and get to live fulfilling lives.
Same. You are not alone💞
How come everyone says they’re an infj but they werent even professionally cased by a psychologist- its the rarest personality type and you most likely arent an INFJ
@@qiwunu Well, given the world population is in the billions,rare doesn't mean less than 1k people.
It's sad to see lots of INFJ people overly cared about someone but never get cared by anybody else. Keep strong kings
THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE READING THE COMMENTS AND FELT TOTALLY UNDERSTOOD.
Facts
Same!
Mind blown.
Exactly...
Being an INFJ is really hard, you always tend to care more, that's why the moment you lose your caring spirit for someone, it means you're too hurt to be there for them any longer. It's not easy to cut them off, but eventually, you'll do.
Im an INTP with an INFJ sister. But like damn because we know each other so well she shows her manipulative side very often and I dó understand her which doesnt make things better because we see through each other like glass. She literally manipulates me by saying stuff like "Dont tell them this or I will tell them your darkest secrets you dont even know I know about.
As we INFJ's are constantly looking for people who really get us on a deep level, wouldn't that mean that we could all be potential soulmates here?
As an INFP, I definitely agree. Would love to meet people who will be able to accept me on a deeper level.
Personally, I dont think it's a good idea to date someone who's an INFJ too. Do you really wanna date yourself? I think anyone can love and understand INFJ with the right process. I think this will work if both INFJs are ripe. Two unripe INFJs dating is super hit or miss.
I used to but not anymore. Don't care if anybody relates to me. I stopped setting my expectations that high
I actually found someone that is an INFJ like me and even with 10 years of age difference we can have the best deep talks and get along very well. We're friends so I can't tell you how it is when you date, but I can say that it's great to have someone to talk to and who can relate to you & understand you on a deeper level.
*Yes*
I'm an INFJ and this described me perfectly, thank you so much for making an amazing video!