Why Do I Hate Myself?
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- Опубликовано: 6 апр 2014
- I'm Kati Morton, a licensed therapist making Mental Health videos!
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Talking to people seems to trigger my self-loathing. I feel like with everything I say I make myself look stupid. And when I talk to people that bitterness and sadness towards myself seeps through which makes me feel worse.
I feel the same. Nice to know it isn't just me.
True…I say things that sound so stupid afterwards. I keep going on about it in my head, convinced everybody think I’m a joke
Same here it’s sucks. I stay quiet most the time because I don’t trust myself then when I do say something it’s a foot in the mouth and can’t stop thinking bout it. When I screw up say sorry but can’t forgive myself.
Same here.
I used to think that about myself too until I accidentally recorded myself having a conversation at work. When i listened back to it, I sounded like a perfectly nice person. It hasn't stopped the self loathing but it has encouraged me to talk to more people and see that anyone who tries to make me feel bad is a jerk@@yvasquez2449
I feel like I was put into this body like it's some kind of sick joke. I honestly don't know how I've last this long.
Mark Abraham I always feel the universe likes to taunt me like it puts a bunch of bad events in for sick kicks then puts one positive to make you think hey, things are fine, then the sick kicks happen again.
I feel you
I’ve felt this way for years it really does suck and idk how I’m still here
Mark Abraham Ive attempted suicide multiple times but I’m too scared to go through with it. I can’t find a less painful way to die.
Me too. Im too sensitive for this fucking world
Ive never felt like I belonged. Ive never felt like anyone gave a shit about me. Even when I was in relationships, I always thought I had to keep their interest. I never thought anyone truly wanted me. Ive always felt like just wanting to die and escape, but something holds me back from killing myself. So this world is like a prison cell, and Im trapped with everyone who gives less fucks about me than I already dont. Well time to go to work. The irony is that Im a CSA.
Hey, ive been there and still feel the same way.
my only analyzation ive come to is that, Nature cares about you. Humans are always changing
I’m in the same place rn
I think more people feel this way more often than not, than would ever dare say. We are taught to feel guilty about thinking about suicide. I hope you are able to hold on and find joy. Or even just contentment. I’ve been down so long joy seems over ambitious. My spiritual teachers help...Eckhart Tolle, Mooji, and even “regular” people who clearly care about “me” and their fellow humans like Katie. There is beauty to be seen, things to laugh at, hugs to get and give, and life to live. Like Katie reminds us, “All relationships take work, especially the one with ourselves.” And things reflect the attention they are given... I know this to be true. So until the unavoidable exit comes, I’ll keep putting my big girl pants on and giving it the old college try... and I truly hope and pray that who ever reads this will as well.
I know that
We carry a lot of pain. What I slowly learned to do was practise giving a lot of fucks about myself with self-care. I often say to myself reassuringly
"We're ok. I'm ok." I'm here listening and caring about my needs and myself. Everyday we win when we keep doing the grind. We can guarantee that there will be moments of contentment and moments of deep aching sadness. It is like prison. We have to feed the positives and give all our attention to small joys and "LIVING in the NOW" so that the negative withers and shrinks away to be a ghost in the past where it belongs. Just a harmless chapter in some dusty old book.
for me, the hardest part about trying to find a positive view is feeling guilty because I let myself feel good. Is that normal?
It is a normal feeling. It's the same thing I experience to this day. The cause is that you don't believe you deserve it, thus, you can inferior that someone is implying that you are unworthy of it. To put it simply, you've been abused mentally/emotionally and this is your coping mechanism.
it's normal if you decide it's normal...your feelings are yours and yours alone
We all have the right to feel that our opinions are important and that we deserve to be valued!
if i feel good about myself someone is going to put me down
I am the same way
I feel self hatred much worse when I'm around people. People are my trigger, because I don't know how to have relationships. Any relationship I have or ever had was not normal.
I hate myself for not being interesting and provide others some happiness and joy just by being around and being Me. That's just not who I am. And lately I feel so guilty that I just disappeared.
I don't want to exist and to just take from people and annoy, I want to feel good on my own, but it's so hard, it's just not going to go away. I cope by staying isolated.
I may be really flawed as a person for this, but I know how a good relationship should be like, I just can't do it.
As I get older, I keep losing people and as of now I have no one just family. It's getting real dark, and sad, and harder to work through
Same. My inability to make friends makes me hate myself. I have good acquaintances, but I can't seem to push it any further. Nobody goes out of their way to include me in anything or contact me unless they need or want something. And I know if I could just make a friend I wouldn't feel like such a garbage unlikable person, but it seems impossible for me.
Saoirse Formidiblum I feel like I’m in the same boat. My friend group had people in it who were horrible to me and always putting me down but they hung out with the people I did like. I stopped hanging out and disassociated for so long it just became awkward and more anxious the more time went by to go out/ask friends out, out of fear of rejection. A dangerous cycle. Now 2 years have flown by I’m not accomplished and find myself with absolutely 0 friends to hang out with. I hate myself. This is not the person I want to be but I feel like I’ve got no escape. I feel like I’m trapped in a grey world where everyone else is having experience and I’m just lonely. I kinda want to die to be honest but I know that’s the wrong choice as my feelings could change in the future and my future will change even if I have to crash down to complete chaos. I feel weak but I’m too stubborn to righteous to be suicidal but also to make a serious change in my life. Also extreme anxiety and self hatred is a big hindrance to me progressing as a human plus a meaning for life /my life or responsibilities that are worthy (children)
That's me, every word
all of this is me and the exact reason why I watched this vid
Exactly it's been a while that im stuck in this situation n it's getting harder n i swear the more i try to force myself b positive the less it works
Self loathing. I can't stand who I've become, how I act (or fail to act/take action) I am so stuck- I wish I could think positively as I used to, I used to have goals- dreams- plans- feelings that I will prevail- now it's "apathy" I see no future- there's just nothing there. I need help.
you sound alot like me what do you think happened?
look at who is making you feel this way in your life!
In DBT, I've learned a skill called turn the mind. It's basically when you realize you're having bad thoughts and use memories, imagery, or music to turn your mind around.
me too kevin. thats why i found this video. i spoke to a friend yesterday who reminded me to 'fake it till you make it' - because i told her I can't say these things to myself in the mirror, about being beautiful because i don't believe it at all. She said, you say it anyway and you keep saying it, after a while it doesn't sound so crazy, after a while...it starts to make sense...and so on. X the little lies we tell ourselves might not be lies, they might be undoing the lies we have already been telling ourselves.
'fake it till you make it' it's True.
It's a bit like forcing oneself to laugh or smile until one actually feels better. While it doesn't solve the underling problem, it is part of a process to change and go against the current negativity that is often present when it comes to self-loathing.
One way to think about it is like this:
A person with a lot of self loathing has -100 points.
That number wont change in any significant way and will stay negative unless that person adds some + points everyday.
At first it will feel like nothing and that it doesn't matter because that person also has a -2 negative bonus for gaining points.
But over time, one will get both better and more used to adding points as well as the points added will accumulate and that -2 negative bonus will also eventually get smaller/go away.
Hope this helps.
Mine are both internal and external.
+Brett Crawford (Transgirl1984) same here..wish you the best
earlybirddreamful Oh, thanks.
+Brett Crawford (Transgirl1984) you're welcome!
Ikr I was waiting for that in the video
Same
To me all this self-haterd stems from not being met emotionally as a kid - which leads to feeling rejected and feeling bad and disgusting for having feelings. My approach has been to reprogram my subconcious negative self talk with having a strong counter-defence against the negative self-talk. Like for example everytime I get a negative thought about myself I meet that thought with a defence that says: No, I will not allow negative self-talk like that. Eventually after a lot of training , your ego will eventually pick up on whats going onand will eventually shut up ( to some extent.)
I've dealt with some self-hatred before, and I've noticed it helps to take baby steps. Don't try to make yourself love yourself right away. If you dislike who you are, try to focus on the things you are good at, even if that's just "I have good intentions" or "I don't mean to be a jerk on purpose." Start with stuff like that. At least you're not mean to be mean. And then when you've convinced yourself about that, start thinking more like "well I'm not that bad, I have friends that like me, so I guess I'm just kinda neutral." I'm not a bad person, but I'm not really a good person either. And then when that becomes your truth, move on to "I can improve some things in my life and in others lives." And so on until you've trained your brain to think more positively. Along the way, you might even notice some problematic behaviors on your part that you might fix, in order to become a better person. And when you aren't in that negative mindset, you can notice these behaviors and say "Okay, so I need to do some work on myself" instead of "I'm just terrible anyways who cares?"
❤️
The circumstances of this very, very competetive life dont allow us to feel ok. Because we are CONSTANTLY in demand of being better, slimmer, more muscular, have more friend, have more money, have the best vacation ever etc etc.....
***** And sex...
Self-hatred has made want to end it several times, especially when I mess up simple tasks. I wasn't always like this, when I was a kid I had ambition, I was confident, I loved myself. But over the years, through a combination of stress, bullying, and loneliness I've began to see myself as more of a burden on this world, and started to think that may the Earth would be a better place without me.
Dont worry, Earth sucks with or without you
Is it considered self-hatred when you don't cut or burn or physically harm yourself but think about something horrible happening to you?
I do that a lot
Elizabeth Sebalac I hope not pain scares you
One thing that helps me is to post 3 positives for the day. Sometimes it is really hard to find anything positive but if you really, really look you can always find something. Something simple like I'm still breathing. I post them then explain why they are a positive. I did this every day during my darkest periods and it really helped.
being mindful helps too!
I don't see things as positive or negative. Only realistic and fact. I'm quite tired of people calling me negative just because I'm being honest and real about my situation
oblivious108 ik that feelings...
Being rational and overly negative are not the same.
Archon Katiara Blackdawn You're right. That still doesn't prove that I'm negative. Your point being?
Even if you're being honest, that doesn't mean it can't be negative. Please search up the word if you are not clear on what it means.
Sappy What are you talking about?
"The most hurtful things are the ones we tell ourselves."
I realized that I am so rebellious I even rebel from my own self telling me what to do. So I learned a way to use reverse psychology on myself when I am feeling really self-loathy. I make a "To-Done" list instead of a "To-Do" list.
I will write all day long on the list after every accomplishment including what might seem trivial or expected of me like getting out of bed, taking a shower, eating a meal at home, taking my son to school, etc. I find that when I make "To-Do" lists I get overwhelmed and never start them, but when I make "To-Done" lists it becomes a game to add to the list. After only one day I start viewing myself with more compassion and begin focusing on my strengths.
JablesTables Thank you for sharing that amazing tipp! Lots of love
Still, remember- sometimes it can come from discrimination and overly-disciplinary parents. Having being bullied nearly every day of school starting at the first few days of the year and having parents with high expectations of you begin to mess you up. Even now, I hate myself. I strive to be perfect, I try to punish myself if I'm not. It's not pity, but rather pure punishment and hatred towards yourself, and being overly self-disciplinary.
AmyLoves BB
I completely understand what you are saying. That described my lifestyle
Your story is exactly like mine. My siblings have a great life, and everything going for them, and my parents are so angry that I am struggling so much. I beat myself up so much for every mistake.
Kati, I'm in recovery from anorexia/bulimia and I've always struggled with self hate and it's worse since I've been weight restored and I cannot thank you enough for this video. You're amazing and I'm so glad I found you on RUclips. Thank you so much!
Katiee Kupcake Keep fighting! And of you feel Bad maybe you can look at how far you have already come. This is amazing! You are the only one who really knows how Hard this journey has been. You can be proud of your self and maybe with that energy you can do the Rest of your way and also fight that negative thoughts.
Sending you lots of love
i just noticed the meditating frog in the background! :) Thanks Kati!
Sometimes I have these weird feelings where I feel so bad and disgusted with myself for no reason I feel like I wanna get out of my body I get this weird shivering sensation like I wanna commit suicide I can't take it anymore.Someone help with an advice please?
I get that sometimes, the festering self hatred that just boils until you can't take it anymore. I recommend writing about all the things you feel, taking the time may help wash away the feelings. If not, also maybe call up a friend, or distract yourself somehow. Usually for me these bouts of intense feeling wear off after about 30 min, so just try to vent the feelings in a healthy way. Cheers!
DBT! It helps me regulate my emotions.
+cellogirl11RW I've just started dbt and hoping it'll help with those kind of feelings too!
oh my god same.
I feel the same way.
Writing or drawing those thoughts/feelings, then destroying it in someway helped me move on from them.
Kyle Whybrew I am essentially writing an elaborate mailbomb, and sending it to thousands at a time.
I’m on the second category :( I hate myself for hurting someone in the past ,today I found a praying mantis near my bathroom I bring it to a nice place in the garden I stayed there watching it’s graceful movements and its fragile body, paying attention to small things makes me
somehow stop ruminating.
Thanks for your videos.
Some part of me wants to feel good about how I look or how I come across to others, but I fear not being humble or real with myself. Logically, I know that if I’m feelin' myself or I’m confident one day, that doesn’t make me arrogant or an immoral person, but emotionally, I put myself down for those few moments of self love. I’ve never quite come to terms with that before, so Kati, I thank you for your channel. In this short video, I learned how beneficial it is to cherish my moments of self appreciation, and tackle my internal insecurities. But further yet, you have helped me to understand the value of therapy as a tool to break those hurtful cycles of thought we all have.
I started an instagram that was inspirational to help others through depression, self harm, EDs, ect. that's what helped me.
I have lived with self-hate nearly all my life.I'm not sure if it's external or internal; I think it's both. But probably all my fault anyway. it usually is.
Same
Same. It’s my fault most definitely. But I bet it isn’t you.
Sharon Minton i feel like everything I do, is just dumb. Being happy or trying to be happy is just stupid. It’s driven me crazy. As weird as it sounds, me being in this state is my fault. I feel like it’s my fault. I like chaos... i don’t know why. ima fucking weirdo
I'm trying to help this girl I really like to get out of depression and self-hatred. She's such a great girl, but she thinks she doesn't deserve anyone. I'm not sure, I think she's still upset about her break up earlier this year, or it's just self-...not hatred but she doesn't like herself.
I really care about this girl I want her happy. But she just shut me out today. It hurt. I'm going to keep trying. This has helped me a little. Thank's so much!
Matt Persiani
hey keep trying to reach out
Matt Persiani keep trying. personally, I do that to people who care about me a lot mostly because I feel like a burden. But trust me, SHE DOES NOT HATE YOU.
I wish i had someone like you in my life.
I just got complimented and I cried. Not cause I was so happy about it but because I didn't believe the person and it felt like they are lying to me. I think that showed me that I hate myself even more than I thought I would.
I love how upbeat and chipper you always are.You are a good modal for kindness in general.:)
I hope Kati sees this..and says something because this is so sweet!
Watching this video actually made me happier, you have such a positive energy!! I love it
Facebook is DEFINITELY a trigger, that's why I deleted it!
Social media is a social cancer.
Fakebook it's not good for society at all.
Good for you! If more people did exactly the same thing as you, the world would be a better place.
About 92% of all Facebook posts are people bragging about themselves (MY vacation, MY wonderful kids, MY BF/GF, what I"M having for dinner at this restaurant, etc), and 5% are stupid posts the sender alone thinks are funny/significant. Only 3% of all the posts have anything important/worthwhile to say. Not worth my time.
Amen, Sister Mindy. Facebook ~ 🐫💩
I recently talked with someone who triggered that worthless feeling in me by a break-up without any reason at high school graduation. I shared that I had C-PTSD and was just seeking insight to help remove some questions that haunt me. It blew my mind to hear him share that he had been tormented by his own shame and anger after being abused by a coach in high school. I had been loving and compassionate, nothing I did was wrong. But he had felt like the only way to cope was to run off to the farthest college and sever all ties so he wouldn't have to explain what had happened. He then spoke a number of positive traits about me to replace those feelings of worthlessness. I know the root is deeper, but that part of it was turned completely around and cannot plague me anymore. I added 2 journal pages recently with those words and other positive words people have used to describe me over the years (that I probably poo-poohed). The list was very long and started to depict a person I really like. So, my identity issues are also helped by this. Still plenty to do, but it's a good start on a tough root.
i always have self-hate pretty much all the time, I'm more concerned about making or seeing other people happy than myself
*****
thank you :)
That’s not self hate we are supposed to put others before ourselves
"A living dog is stronger than a dead lion" where there is life there is hope!
I agree
***** I used this video in my women's group on Monday. The ladies LOVED it. They actually requested that I let you know how much they liked it. And I got the best compliment - they said that you and I are very similar and that you reminded them of me. :) :) :) Thank you for all you do.
I needed this...Maybe someday I'll make progress. But for now, it's nice to hear someone say it out loud and to read comments that I can relate to.
I didn't realize I hated myself for years. A reiki practitioner "prescribed" me aromatherapy for self love, and that's when I finally figured it out.
I've done a lot of work, but even still, sometimes I really hate myself. It's my inner voice repeating things I heard as a kid. My mom was emotionally abusive, and then I was also bullied for 7 years. My inner voice tells me things like I'm stupid, I'm annoying, nobody likes me, I'm a screw up, I'm a failure, I'm worthless.
What I have been doing is trying to reprogram my inner voice. When I catch myself thinking about the ways I hate myself, I turn it around: I'm not stupid or a failure or a screw up, everyone makes mistakes and it's normal. I'm human and it's ok. I'm not annoying and people like me (and then I list off my family and friends), but it is impossible for everyone to like me and that's ok and doesn't mean I'm a bad person. I know I always do my best to live by my morals and be kind to everyone, and all I can ever do is my best. I'm not worthless, my opinions, experiences, and interests matter just as much as anyone else's.
Stuff like that.
I also try to look into the mirror every time I'm alone in front of one, and look into my eyes and try to feel with my heart: I love you just as you are, no one's perfect and that's ok.
I think about how I love pretty much everyone else, and they all make mistakes and have flaws and yet I still love them, so I can love me too. I try to take that feeling of love I have for others and project it onto the person I see in the mirror.
It can start with a single random thought. I'm covered in injuries as I punch my self often. I hit my chest so hard tonight that I fell and nearly blacked out as my heart lost its rythm. I never feel sorry for myself, I just hate with intensity,
Punching is my preferred style of self-harm. I especially favor head-butting the walls. Can't stand myself.
I know this maybe is no help, but you are both two beautifully unique incredible creatures. You are human and therefor it is okay to be flawed. But that does not mean you can not be amazing. I send you two some love and hope it reaches you a little
I hate myself too. I wish it werent so. I do not see myself continuing on like this it is too hard, gone on for too long. I can no longer function. I am afraid of everything and am constantly avoiding everyone and everything.
I always lnew i was different than the happy children. Not much of a home life then got addicted to porn. Thats been a killer
Man i wish i could punch the living shit out of myself
I don't want my mom to worry though so i just imagine it
I was a dick to one of my best friends and I hate myself for it... she said she isn't mad anymore but how can I forgive myself, especially when I thought of myself as being a really good friend?
Prove her and yourself that you are worthy of forgiveness
Actions speak louder than words
I have social anxiety for over ten years now, beginning with age 13. It got a lot better now, I have lots of social contacts even though most of them are pretty trivial. I realized that the main problem isn't the anxiety tho. It's the self hatred. I am very convinced that I am not loveworthy and a bad person. Everyone would argue with me about that, as I come off as this very kind girl. But I build a construct of proof around this picture I have of myself.
Almost every social interaction is like an act for me. I feel as if I play a role every time hoping that they won't see the 'real' me, boring, unlovable, stupid, hypocratic, mean, egoistic and egocentric, shallow etc. I don't even know how to play myself anymore. Some days it works out and I'm happy that I made a good impression. Other days I got the feeling that their oppinion tends to seeing me as a weird person. That they are hoping to avoid any contact with me. And I feel shattered. Everything hurts, only by sensing some kind of rejection, or by overthinking all the embarrassing and weird things I've said and done.
Sometimes it feels like a nightmare. All this time wasted, being alone or thinking about who I am, what I seem to be, how other people think about me.
Ah, it's a dark path.
I hope it got better for you
It's not just people who are downright toxic, but in my case I feel so lonely and would much rather be alone than spending time with all of these people who's life script is "there is no happiness, success is totally hard to achieve, everybody's relationships are fundamentally sad". They can be nice and genuinely want to help, but subtly tell you that there is no hope. That triggers me the most. I crave so much for people who are optimistic and who don't lie to themselves. One day I happened to have to take a taxi somewhere and I swear that driver is a one in a million person. You could feel it in everything he said that his mental and emotional purpose was not to dwell on the negatives, it's like we found joy in every trivial topic lol. I'm glad I meet people like this even in situation like that, it's a reminder that I'm not crazy.
Yeah, I feel like every action can be contagious and work it's way through my community. I try to be generally kind to everyone, not to please them, but because I want to be surrounded by kind people. Life doesn't have to be miserable. It doesn't mean it's always easy, but I don't need to make things worse. I can choose to focus on the good things.
Thank you for this video. My biggest issue right now with my depression is just a deep rooted hatred of myself and it feels like every time I try to get help I get told the same thing. "You just have to find people who accept you." And that doesn't work nor does it feel realistic to me but your advice is something I believe I can actively do to help myself. I've never liked the kind of advice where people just say it'll get better or I just have to wait for something to happen to make it better. I want to be able to actively do something to help myself because that's the only way I feel I can get better. So thank you a lot for this video.
The last time I saw self hate come up was after talking to my spouse who is invalidating and unsupportive with my issues. I am not able to rely on him for support. Sadly, I self harmed in front of him and this shocked him and shit him up. He felt terrible afterwards cause he believed he pushed me too far and did not handle things appropriately.
thank you! you look so genuine and passionate, i really had a bad day and being self hatred 24/7, thank you again for making me feel better be positive!
This was just perfect timing! I've been feeling really low and bad about myself this past week, barely wanted to even get out of bed! Thankyou so much for your videos :)
I am so glad to have found your channel. I have been on a waiting list to see someone for my self harm and anxiety since November and I have no idea how long it is going to take. I have already had 3 admission interviews and I am starting to get really desperate. Just listening to what you have to say really calms me down. Thank you.
i love kati morton videos, she is sooooo helpful, and getsto the root of issues.... Thank you may god bless you in All you do!!!!
i used to look in the mirror and say u r nothing nobody cares for u bu that is starting to fade away since i wached this video it helped me allot this mornin i saw my self in the mirror and said to myself you mean something and i smiled for the first in weeks
I just really wanted to say that what you're doing is really great & helpful & just thank you for being so uplifting
when Katie says "stay tuned" that really blesses me!
You're amazing, Kati. It's like you read my mind and upload the exact videos that I need that week! Thanks for being you xoxo
Love Kati Mortons Videos soo much, such a helpful, cheerful, altruistic, loving and caring person!!! One can see her passion for her job, so nice to watch :-)
Anyone in this headspace is not alone. I was there 2 years ago, began a daily 10 minute meditation practice and began journaling 3 things I’m grateful for each morning and evening and it’s changed my life. I’m now genuinely grateful for the mental health breakdown that led me to these patterns.
I love this! ."...clouds will be puffier"
Something that helps me is I write a letter to myself about the issue that brings me down. But I write this letter from an imaginary friend that is trying to encourage me and tells me positive things I've done and how I helped him before, and also include what advice they may suggest to help your situation, then put it away somewhere others won't read it. After a few hours or later that night, reread it and I promise you it will make you feel better and encouraged to work thru it. Then I burn it and that no longer exists. My therapist who is awesome like Kati and even have same personalities, asked me to do this and I thought it was too strange to do it, but she convinced and I'm glad she did. And an unexpected reward in it is seeing you will do whatever it takes and that we can overcome thoughts and feelings like being embarrassed. I hope this help everyone it speaks too and stay safe during these times.
Thank you sooo much kati for this weeks video, I am that person that always thinks negatively and I am trying my best to change it. And the doing a positive day story that is my next post for your website. You are truly amazing!!! Also you are right when you say the more positive your outlook the less negative, to those who are struggling, my road to recovery has not been easy but I try everyday I reflect on the day before (briefly !!!!) and see what I can do today to make my life better. Again not easy but given time life becomes less impossible and more possible!!!!!
Kati, thank you for this great video! I love how you make things so logical and simple, such that positive change doesn't seem so daunting. Your videos really help me! xoxo
Think this has just become my favourite RUclips channel. Due to start CBT and this channel is amazing :-)
I like the idea of creatively writing about a more ideal day and what I think that may be like. Even just thinking about it without having even written a word gives me an increased sense of elation. Wonderful, thanks!
Thanks Kati! I love the attitude you depict! What helps me is jogging outside the park or the treadmill, and I encourage myself by telling myself that jogging is going to help me feel better in the end, because I always feel great after a good workout!
I often think that no matter what I choose to do with my time and my life I will feel like a mistake of a person, that there's nothing I do is right and nothing will make me happy 'cause I'm always tired no matter what I do.
This channel is so helpful in many levels! Keep up the good work :D
And what if we hate ourselves simply because we are physically repulsive?
Then try to look at yourself through the eyes of someone who loves you; your family and friends don't think you're repulsive, they think you're wonderful and beautiful!!
Don't feel so alone. A lot of people hate themselves for a lot of reasons. I hate myself too.
TheHebenonVial I don't have "friends" or family..!! I had all the odds against me when i was born. If i knew what was going to happen to me, how much suffering I'd endure, i just wish the RCH in Melbourne, didn't keep fighting to keep me alive. I died twice, why keep trying. All i know is rejection, an lonliness. Everyone turns the other way, i am just "baggage" to ppl. I'm not their problem/responsibility. I don't want to be a burden either. I wasn't supposed to survive. Even after everything said and done, i live in darkness, my very own hell hole. I've asked for help so many times, no one seems to be able to help me. Excuse after excuses and lies after lies. I'm sick and tired of trying to fight a battle that i keep losing. Over and over i fall further in the cracks of society. I'm 44, i know how to ask for help, im not afraid to ask either. I see by their actions, that they've got their own problems, and don't want or need mine.
Society is shallow and will probably judge you for how you look. But you don't have to be judge yourself so harshly. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. If you think you are beautiful and worth it, then what does it matter what anyone else thinks? Also, I would recommend watching "The Hunchback of Notre Dame" or "The Phantom of the Opera". You simply can't judge a book by its cover. There is so much more to a person than the way they look and I hope you find this helpful. Much love. I highly doubt you are as "physically repulsive" as you think.
Thank you for articulating this. I haven't been able to put it into words and I felt like nobody else really experienced it this way
Wow I’m a new subscriber/watcher you are a very caring person. Your videos have great advice I have become a little more self confident. Thank u for all your help.
It's never external. People who have been raised in a healthy family, develop a healthy self-image. You're talking about surface feelings and causes, and self-hatred isn't surface. It cracks me up how people think fixing this is so simple. "just do this" or "just do that." People who don't have this problem, don't understand it either.
Thank you. I really have a big problem about hating myself and your video helped me a lot. Thanks.
These videos help sooo much
Thank you. I really needed this today.
This is one of my favorites. So much good advice in here.
Thank you. There are alot of things I do that makes me fell this way. Now I can work on a positive change
Love your videos, Kati! You're so intelligent
I loved this video and your lingo! Keep it up chicky!! 👍🏼💜
This is my emergency video. I recognized that i‘m talking bad to myself and seeked especially this video. I watch it and now I can get to sleep without obsessing negatively about myself. Thank you Katie!
Katie thank you so much for your videos, you seriously help so much! Sending all the positive vibes your way
Complinsults! HAHA! That's the kinda stuff I say, your lingo, animated persona and language is very much on my wavelength, so I can relate to this very well. This video definitely helped me and it does take my head out of that fog, i's another perspective, really cool. I usually hate that cheesy stuff on facebook, quotes and the like, but this is great! I am in my diploma of counselling and sometimes it's just totally refreshing to hear real talk, like this! Thanks!
Thanks for these great videos!
Thank you! So much Kati..you truly are making a difference in my life...God Bless You!!!😊👏💖💖💖
Kati Morton you are my favorite mental health channel
Thank you Kati I can totally relate with the "compliment insults" thing
My perfect day...no work, no kids,( no dishes,laundry, cleaning, mopping), no school, no bills, no errands to run, no worries... nothing but a hot beach, wind blowing, and Seagull's stealing my lunch. Ok lets remove the birds from this story too ;) Love you Kati!
***** I had to write a paper this week for my women's psychology class. Question was how would you help a friend who had an eating disorder. I referenced one of your videos in my paper :) Im in my senior year finally! Almost have BS in psychology! Have a question about interviewing for grad school though but don't know if you take personal messages or who I should ask
I really needed to see this,I've been ruminating alot lately and beating myself up.Thanks
Awesome video, I've been dealing with self hatred for a few years now, but I will totally take some of your advice
You are just awesome. I keep finding your videos & they are so relevant. Thank you
Your advise about surrounding ourselves with people who make us feel good about ourselves is my problem, no one I know makes me feel good about myself, and I keep trying to meet new people, but it goes nowhere and I feel bad again. Like, I'll meet a new co-worker at work, and at first we talk a lot, but then they get established and be part of the cool crowd and I'm suddenly not noticed anymore. That's where my emotional damage comes from, always used to meet other people and tossed aside when the new "friend" in my life meets other people around me.
Anyone else here have that problem?
Thank you for making these kind of serious videos
Your videos are so helpful. Thank you ❤️
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!
Love the videos keep up the great work
Kati brightens my day
Thank you Kati. I go into ruminating cycles/intrusive thoughts/OCD kind of thoughts but it’s getting better. I’m a recovering codependent.
I hate myself. Every day since I was probably in sixth grade. It feels like realism rather than positive vs negative. I realize I am slow. I am dumb. I am incompetent at everything I have ever tried. I am not good enough. I deserve to suffer for living a life better than I should have. I have no friends. Everyone I love I let down and they leave. I am a failure. This is what my self hatred sounds like. It feels like a mantra, a chant, a meditation. It's my normal day.
Thank you for sharing positive tips! They help me a lot :)
You are really cool Kati, thanks for making these videos.
WOW, thank you so much for the advice. ive dealt with self loathing since i was a kid. i cant even begin to explain how helpful i found this video to be. thank you very very much. im not very good at keeping a journal but i think ill give drawing my best days in cute little comic form
this is really helpful thank you so much
Omg! I wanna hug you. Cuz Im not nice to myself. Im my own bully. But u have a great point. "Focus on the good days".
thank you its taken some time doing this but i'm so happy to report it does work so awesome Kati
This is great! I'm so glad you made a video of this topic, I'm sure it'll help many and give a great clue where to begin. :)
Fantastic video, absolutely love the word 'complinsults' so perfect! thank you
this is an amazing video! when you wanted us to imagine a day that we have felt good about ourselves, i could not help myself laughing and crying at the same time. I do not know the reason but i felt complex emotions. those good days existed in my life and just remembering about those days made me laugh and cry at the same time. thank you. i already feel better 😙
Hi Kati,I am so happy I found you!:)))) Your work is so awesome! I wanted to share some topics I will be working on with my students during group activities, that I noticed to be prevalent in our schools, which are:1. Positive Self-talk/ Self-Esteem/ Self-Respect;2. Self-Control/ Anger Management;3. Age Appropriate Social Skills/ Healthy Boundaries;4. Respecting Authority Figures;5. Coping Skills (Dealing with Change, Managing Stress)6. Concentration Skills/ Following Instructions-Attentiveness.I would love if you could talk about these issues so I can present your videos as the intro to my Mindfulness sessions.THANK YOU!!!!!