Military TikToks Gone Wrong... Part 3

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  • Опубликовано: 19 сен 2024
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    Military TikTok Fails Gone Wrong
    Veteran Reacts To Funny Military TikToks

Комментарии • 760

  • @nikkoortiz
    @nikkoortiz  Год назад +177

    What military branch has the best tiktok fails?!

  • @paulherman5822
    @paulherman5822 Год назад +428

    Had a nephew whose first deployment was Bosnia. Got out, did a few years as a bailiff, got married (and is still married to her), joined the Navy with the easiest job that they have, tour guide on the USS Constitution. Realised that the advancement was lousy, went back to the Army and saw time in Iraq and Afghanistan. Several IEDs, not a scratch. Maxed as a noncom, got out and has worked with a military contractor ever since. He said, "Same uniform, same weapons, but overtime." 😁

    • @jediknight1294
      @jediknight1294 Год назад +12

      God I miss being PMC

    • @Khornecussion
      @Khornecussion 7 месяцев назад +3

      @@jediknight1294 I wanted to go military and then do proper mercenary work for something like Blackwater or other shady mercenary com- I mean... Privately contracted military organizations.
      Leukemia kinda stopped that.

    • @jediknight1294
      @jediknight1294 7 месяцев назад +1

      @@Khornecussion I did the private thing from the start I went to uni had surgery and the money dried up and the big boys with combat resumes started going back to the jobs me with a few classes went for. I miss it... Maybe one day Il go back.

  • @brandoncarter6369
    @brandoncarter6369 Год назад +135

    “It’s not a stereotype
    It’s a statistic”
    Shit had me laughing so hard

  • @jesteroffire
    @jesteroffire Год назад +67

    I’m in Navy recruiting and EVERY DAY I get calls from the local army base because soldiers have had enough and want to be sailors.

    • @Gabe-nx1bz
      @Gabe-nx1bz Год назад

      STOP THE CAP

    • @jesteroffire
      @jesteroffire Год назад +1

      @@Gabe-nx1bz brother, I wish it was cap.

    • @johnwanderin3872
      @johnwanderin3872 Год назад

      I tried enlisting in the Navy (before my med DQ) and was looking SeaBees so I could be in the “family business” but still do some soldier shit. Go figure.

    • @jameshughes6984
      @jameshughes6984 5 месяцев назад

      Bullshit

  • @SnortingAutisticKids
    @SnortingAutisticKids Год назад +76

    My dad served in the U.S Army for 18+ years, he was discharged medically and is alive and well. Thank you for your service Nikko!

    • @Astheticskyovermoon
      @Astheticskyovermoon Год назад +1

      Wow! Thank you, for your dad for the service! May God bless him! May God bless you and your family and give you success and happiness!❤

  • @kaidenhang908
    @kaidenhang908 Год назад +32

    Man I was searching on Google to see if Marines actually eat crayons and when I got to "do Marines" it immediately gave me the suggestion"do Marines actually eat crayons?" 😂

  • @guadalupeibarra5657
    @guadalupeibarra5657 Год назад +74

    "For my mom's papers" FELT that! 😂😂😂

  • @TheLovelorn192
    @TheLovelorn192 Год назад +39

    7:28 don’t forget, there is thin glass in there that separates the two liquids. The cracking when you activate it is the glass breaking.
    So basically “let’s drink deadly chemicals that have glass shards in em”

    • @michaelsingleterry1573
      @michaelsingleterry1573 Год назад

      Actually they are nontoxic so just glass is the problem

    • @Aredel
      @Aredel 10 месяцев назад

      @@michaelsingleterry1573nontoxic =/= safe to consume

    • @sciathoir
      @sciathoir 10 месяцев назад

      @@michaelsingleterry1573the ones made for children yes… these are chemlights, that shit is literal fuckin cancer…. And glass

  • @truly_I_say
    @truly_I_say Год назад +17

    I ran pool pt for my platoon for a while and I had this one soldier, black dude, who told me "straight up sgt.. I'll take a field grade before I get in that pool!" and he was ready to fight about it for real... we were in the shallow end too lol

  • @jenniferstewarts4851
    @jenniferstewarts4851 Год назад +12

    my fav joke is still... "Ok airforce we are meeting at 3 pm, for the army thats 15:00 hours, for the navy thats 6 bells into 4th watch... and for the marines... thats when Mickey's Big hand...."

  • @MoonFlux
    @MoonFlux Год назад +75

    I should join the Military as the "Camera guy"
    Because we all know the Camera Guy never dies, even in a nuke....

    • @nikkoortizshorts
      @nikkoortizshorts Год назад +4

      Haha yes 😂

    • @reikun86
      @reikun86 Год назад

      Haha True.

    • @TF2bot
      @TF2bot Год назад +1

      Wearing a gopro is scientifically proven to increase survivability in combat by 127%

    • @Vendetta_s
      @Vendetta_s Год назад

      @@TF2botI know it’s a joke but I hate to tell you… 💀 we all wish GoPro could. I think holding the camera is best option

    • @TF2bot
      @TF2bot Год назад

      @@Vendetta_s well I guess it is a cameraman and not a goproman

  • @soldierski1669
    @soldierski1669 Год назад +13

    Bumped into a guy who went from ARMY to NAVY, said the NAVY was more laid back, said you could get drunk alot more and they didn't seem to care.
    That being said, he was rotating my tires at a Pep Boys.

  • @uhtoasst1881
    @uhtoasst1881 Год назад +70

    THIS IS SPARTA 💯
    Nikko coming in clutch on a Sunday!!
    Thanks brother 🤟🏼

  • @JohnDoe-df2zz
    @JohnDoe-df2zz Год назад +5

    I needed these laughs. I retired from the Air Force in 2007, my son just left for boot camp today. Hoping he loves it.

    • @Aredel
      @Aredel 10 месяцев назад

      Got any advice for aspiring recruits?

  • @christopherdillard1
    @christopherdillard1 Год назад +35

    "Army and Marines, we work for a living."
    Come join us on a submarine, Nikko...

  • @Blondieee-ke5ez
    @Blondieee-ke5ez Год назад +9

    YOU WERE IN YOUR MOMS KITCHEN SIR WHEN WE ALL FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU 😂 TELL ME IM WRONG YOU CANT

  • @Landon-rq3ub
    @Landon-rq3ub Год назад +42

    I love the military TikTok fails that he makes

  • @Puggy42069
    @Puggy42069 Год назад +2

    Going from Army to Navy is such a massive W. Can confirm the Navy is 2nd to the Air Force.

  • @Maplex1030
    @Maplex1030 Год назад +1

    The pregnancy one is worse if you been in the fields for 9 months

  • @PhoebeRychener
    @PhoebeRychener Год назад +18

    Nikko out here making everyone's day better😂❤

  • @eduardostapenko6808
    @eduardostapenko6808 11 месяцев назад +1

    Top reasons i see to join the military:
    1: i will have someone telling what to do. And will get a home.
    2: i will be able not to have social life.
    3: something else i forgot to put here.

  • @americasgothart787
    @americasgothart787 Год назад +1

    Angry Cops did a whole skit on the idiots drinking the Chem lights. Funny as shit.

  • @crystaldunn1082
    @crystaldunn1082 7 месяцев назад

    Hey Nikko, military guys are the only ones that can handle my personality and aggression, civilian men run away from me.

  • @Cod_player_
    @Cod_player_ Год назад +3

    7:32 when I was like five or so, I drank some and I thought my stomach was gonna glow. Yes, I really did that.💀💀💀💀

  • @Raven_Enforcer
    @Raven_Enforcer 10 месяцев назад

    That big toe had a face. You know that soldier caught hell.

  • @Ima_sniperrr-Louisianacowgirl
    @Ima_sniperrr-Louisianacowgirl Год назад +6

    Thanks for making the day better!!! Nikko your frickin awesome keep sending it with the fantastic work!!!! 🤘

  • @huntermasterson1774
    @huntermasterson1774 Год назад +1

    I’m ROTC for my high school and watching your videos, helps me because I may want to go into the military one day

  • @DeltonRay
    @DeltonRay Год назад +3

    Do another video with narrator

  • @recking168W
    @recking168W Год назад +4

    honestly the army to navy thing is facts the navy dudes always seemed so much happier while us army dudes were depressed as shit slinging monsters 247

  • @feelinspiffy696
    @feelinspiffy696 Год назад +3

    5:56 nah, what was kowalski getting into

  • @KasperJay
    @KasperJay Год назад +2

    Hey mate,
    Would you consider doing a haunted location video with Narrator? I reckon that would be hilarious 😂

  • @Adam-om9hu
    @Adam-om9hu Год назад

    Damn that sleeping soilder in 2023 was a pretty boy. Makeup on, pampered eyebrows and on point hair😂

  • @maxgrucza1795
    @maxgrucza1795 Год назад +1

    Nikko has me saying brother brother now and i cant stop.

  • @LW-boxing-LA
    @LW-boxing-LA Год назад +4

    I love his reactions he a funny funny guy

  • @nickhinshaw38
    @nickhinshaw38 Год назад +1

    Orange is the only crayon to eat!!! It's the only one that's an actual color and flavor!!!

  • @landonbuenconsejo2856
    @landonbuenconsejo2856 8 месяцев назад

    We gone a sleep here tonight, Ohkay 😂 , literally had me crying and laughing at the same time. lol The 11B life hits different yeeee 🤪

  • @ShadowS1-01
    @ShadowS1-01 Год назад +5

    Love the military fails 😂

  • @michaelpadilla2674
    @michaelpadilla2674 Год назад +1

    Had a buddy once upon a time, not only twirl chem lights like he was at a rave with company commander, but break it and exchange chem light liquids with said company commander

  • @MilitaryPlayer141
    @MilitaryPlayer141 3 месяца назад

    Bro actually got his ass kicked out the plane 😂

  • @robertbrooks4413
    @robertbrooks4413 Год назад +1

    One thing that will always wake me up is a metal trashcan bouncing down a wooden floor.....

  • @giashah2637
    @giashah2637 Год назад +3

    9:22 "Extreemly intelemegence"

  • @michaelfairchild
    @michaelfairchild Год назад +3

    "There is no such thing as a bad idea" - Anyone whos been in the military.

    • @gizmo1802
      @gizmo1802 Год назад

      The good idea fairy strikes again!

  • @joshuakelley2882
    @joshuakelley2882 Год назад

    Every month we did water survival training, at least 2 black service members needing to be pulled out by the lifeguard.

  • @sphyrnidaegames8922
    @sphyrnidaegames8922 Год назад +1

    Godsend Video, THANK YOU!!!!!

  • @TheKingsapostle
    @TheKingsapostle Год назад

    Stereotypes are built on facts.

  • @Greek_Valkyrie
    @Greek_Valkyrie Год назад +4

    My dad started in the Army and went to Air Force. He served 21+ years (his words). My mom was Air Force and served 7-8 years.

  • @lcscarface
    @lcscarface Год назад +1

    Coastie here. We had an ex army, marine and an air force dude in my bootcamp company. Both the marine and air force dudes got kicked out. The army guy was squared away.

  • @criminalbrewing5509
    @criminalbrewing5509 Год назад

    Why did you join the ARMY?
    To pay for College... NO
    To pay for my Moms Surgery... NO
    To advance my Alcoholism... uh, wwha was tha squestion?

  • @erikbaumann5444
    @erikbaumann5444 Год назад +1

    The thud when he hit the tractor is priceless 😂😂😂

  • @kylehall3522
    @kylehall3522 Год назад +2

    I KNOW THE GIRL WHO THREW THE GRENADE I WENT TO BASIC WITH HER 5:00

  • @yomama269378
    @yomama269378 Год назад +2

    2:21 i had that happen to my right foot when i had to have a cast on to fix my tendon. i wound up with a couple inch deep crack in my foot for like 2 weeks or so shit sucks and its sooooooo painful.

  • @rebeccamount50
    @rebeccamount50 Год назад +2

    0:39 "Your injuries are not service related."

  • @NateDaGreat_TTV
    @NateDaGreat_TTV Год назад +1

    love these

  • @Mod0308
    @Mod0308 Месяц назад

    Me and my hubby used to grapple….he knew if I got my thighs around his neck he was DONE. LITERALLY almost put him out one time 😂

  • @justinfarrar1995
    @justinfarrar1995 6 месяцев назад

    On my first active duty contract in the Army, I recall seeing numerous marines transferring to the Army when I was PVT snuffy doing my in-processing. I seen at least 3 transitioning in the first 3ish years in the Army. 😂

  • @SmudgyContent
    @SmudgyContent Год назад +1

    My stepdaughter wanted to know which branch to join. Told her my mom was in the air force for 6yrs. She asked why Air Force. Said it’s Thè easiest branch in the military and sign up for couple years and have all them military discounts…

  • @Soggywaffles-the-real
    @Soggywaffles-the-real 9 месяцев назад

    The purple crayons hit different

  • @cakecastle8148
    @cakecastle8148 Год назад

    Love how a mosquito wings is flexing his nonexistant stripes, like bro...

  • @brycefreeden4081
    @brycefreeden4081 Год назад +1

    marines have best tikitoks when it comes to gone wrong or fails and BLUE CRAYON FROM CRAYOLA MMMMMMMMMMM

  • @Thetreetwig
    @Thetreetwig 2 месяца назад

    Tbh Nikko, hands down the blue crayon is the best.

  • @calebhaugh1894
    @calebhaugh1894 Год назад

    “Why’d you join the navy” “I liked top gun”

  • @agra3804
    @agra3804 3 месяца назад

    9:20 she's Brazilian. The first woman that completed the spec. Op. Course. Here, they have to pass through the same things that a man's gonna pass. She's amazing.

  • @americanboy338
    @americanboy338 Год назад +1

    Two guys in my AFROTC Detachment are prior enlisted Army, we’ve all been giving them shit. Granted, we haven’t begun our service yet, so there are some lines we can’t cross. But it’s still a fun time

  • @lindsyfish6704
    @lindsyfish6704 10 месяцев назад

    I got lucky, I learned about starting siphons from doing water changes in fish tanks growing up. If someone in your family is a big car guy during your childhood, you learn like this.
    Fish poop water is way better than fuel, imo.

  • @eduardostapenko6808
    @eduardostapenko6808 11 месяцев назад +1

    3:43 i want to become a soldier to get such good wake up reaction, you see, even arthellery strikes work pretty bad for me.

  • @msgoblue71
    @msgoblue71 Год назад +2

    I wanna see, Nikko fails! JK
    Nikko doesn't fail to brighten all our days. On his way to 2m! Thank you, Nikko for all that you do! We appreciate! 💙

  • @jg3_75
    @jg3_75 Год назад

    The marines with the Chem lights bro I shouldn’t be surprised but I fuckin screamed!!!

  • @thewolfman1721
    @thewolfman1721 Год назад

    Those cots are some POG shit. Infantry still sleeps on the ground🤙🏼

  • @hugeinjapan4635
    @hugeinjapan4635 Год назад

    Navy to Army ... 12 years total. Army was a culture shock. Army was undisciplined, unmotivated, inefficient ...basically a train wrecking into a dumpster fire for 6 years. Consequently ...army was more fun.

  • @sonarshep2814
    @sonarshep2814 Год назад

    Bro what wakes me up in 2023 is while I'm asleep in my rack, underwater, and I hear "fire, fire in the foward compartment, class charlie fire from _____" from a loudspeaker right next to me and then all hell breaks loose. LMAO

  • @ginger_puff
    @ginger_puff Год назад

    Knew a few guys who did green to blue and preferred it and 100% can verify the swimming statistic.

  • @crazeddiesel
    @crazeddiesel Год назад

    When you get your first duty station…… and you get stationed back home 😒

  • @farhadwardak4707
    @farhadwardak4707 Год назад

    The fucking Kowalski cut, I can’t breathe 💀

  • @darkvenomcz3683
    @darkvenomcz3683 11 месяцев назад

    That one dude with the trench foot, daaaamn

  • @cardengixoth6878
    @cardengixoth6878 Год назад

    You want a trigger phrase, Nikko? I'll give you one:
    Where the fuck is your CAC?!

    • @xiphos8219
      @xiphos8219 2 месяца назад

      I imagine your commander asking you this but in a calm voice is so much more triggering. Like, why is he being nice? That shit's important, he should be enraged... What does he know?

  • @TeacherTaj
    @TeacherTaj Месяц назад

    It's called siphoning, Nikko. Jesus.

  • @lifesyphon1
    @lifesyphon1 26 дней назад

    One thing I’ve learned from watching Nikki’s videos: the military is waaay gayer than I thought 😂

  • @clearnights5867
    @clearnights5867 Год назад +1

    0:56 It's just a PFC or LCPL on firewatch in the schoolhouse, not a drill sergeant 😂

  • @TheHistoryNerdWhoLovesMerica
    @TheHistoryNerdWhoLovesMerica Год назад

    My Dog was Just diegnosed with cancer and ive been a bit down lately but nicco's energy is a huge help

  • @lemorles-divine-smite6003
    @lemorles-divine-smite6003 Год назад

    That girl throwing the grenade was at my basic crazy swing it in a Nikko video 😂

  • @xxBlackxWindowxx
    @xxBlackxWindowxx 11 месяцев назад

    I can’t hide myself, I literally watch your vids when my Navy bf is doing work and I can’t talk to him.

  • @Sion_Revan
    @Sion_Revan 6 месяцев назад

    Paratrooper at 0:36 Achievement Unlocked: Made the Grade

  • @Trixeyboy
    @Trixeyboy 9 месяцев назад

    When I am old enough to join the marines when someone asks why’d you join I would say “crayon” and “ you got any”

  • @Hillybilly40
    @Hillybilly40 Месяц назад

    2:34 I get why my dad is so serious about changing socks lol

  • @LostDraugr
    @LostDraugr Год назад

    Don't be hatin on my Orange Crayolas!

  • @Mast3rB3ard
    @Mast3rB3ard 2 месяца назад

    Bro the brown crayons are the GOAT!!! They taste like apple pie

  • @jakehandon2664
    @jakehandon2664 Год назад

    Bro the person as a car he doesn’t identify as a race car he identifies as a racist 😂😂

  • @itsquarantinetime
    @itsquarantinetime Год назад

    "AIN'T NO STEREOTYPE IT'S A FUCKIN STATISTIC" the fucking truth amen im cackling

  • @heavytrooper2402
    @heavytrooper2402 11 месяцев назад +1

    No joke, I went to basic with this chick 4:57 she was a good person and did well overall. She just wasnt loud. Mostly due to the fact that english was her second language. I cant remember if she was national guard or active but I do remember that she joined to get her citizenship or somthing like that.

  • @Daniboi_24
    @Daniboi_24 Год назад +1

    I’ve been watching for a while and I would really like to see your reaction to the British army cadets

  • @Thiccbeard
    @Thiccbeard 10 месяцев назад

    You're not wrong about the swimming😂

  • @world--Star
    @world--Star Год назад +1

    5:55 Nikko say something really cool

  • @THELAKEDEVIL
    @THELAKEDEVIL Год назад +3

    In the British army we get for inspection every two weeks and that is a fact

  • @Racingdriver8
    @Racingdriver8 10 месяцев назад

    Yeah, the one thing that scares entire unit say zonk

  • @thegingeravenger1
    @thegingeravenger1 4 месяца назад

    The orange crayon tastes like my bad life choices

  • @jxlegend_clipz
    @jxlegend_clipz Год назад

    purple and red hit different

  • @Dinahopkins
    @Dinahopkins Год назад

    The orange crayon, low-key fire

  • @Nicolethemapper
    @Nicolethemapper 11 месяцев назад

    "He identifies as a race car" got me rolling 😂😂😂

  • @peklenc9727
    @peklenc9727 Год назад

    Nikko noooooooo. Please tell me you ain’t been siphoning incorrectly this whole time 😂 ain’t supposed to get shit in your mouth you pull the liquid to the halfway point stop it with your thumb and let gravity do the rest 😂

  • @JeffyGuu-e9r
    @JeffyGuu-e9r Год назад

    My dad used to be in the Air Force he killed himself just last year life has been hard but your videos make it Sumwat better